Freud_Burlingham_1943_War_and_Children_k_text

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the destruction which goes on around them andby shelter life. Or else they avoid these dangers,are evacuated to the country and suffer othershocks through separation from the parents atan age which needs emotional stability andpermanency. Choosing between two evilsseems to be all that war-time care is able toaccomplish forthem.On the other hand we should not be tooquick in drawing such conclusions. That evacuationunder the present conditions is as upsettingas bombing itself is no proof yet thatmethods of evacuation could not be foundwhich guard the children's life and bodilyhealth and atthe same time provide the possibilityfor normal psychological developmentand steady progress in education.Our case material shows that it is not somuch the fact of separation to which thechild reacts abnormally as the form in whichthe separation has taken place. The childexperiences shock when it is suddenly andwithout preparation exposed to dangers withwhich it cannot cope emotionally. In the caseof evacuation the danger is represented bythe sudden disappearance of all the peoplewhom it knows and loves. Unsatisfied longingproduces in it a state of tension which isfelt as shock. If separation happened slowly,if the people who are meant to substitute for84
the mother were known to the child beforehand,transition from one object to the otherwould proceed gradually. If the mother reappearedseveral times during the period whenthe child had to be weaned from her, the painof separation would be repeated, but it wouldbe felt each successive time in smaller doses.By the time the affection of the child had letgo of the mother the new substitute objectwould be well known and ready at hand. Therewould be no empty period in which the feelingsof the child are turned completely inwardand, consequently, there would be littleloss of educational achievement. Regressionoccurs while the child is passing through theno-man's-land of affection, i.e. during the timethe old object has been given up and before thenew one has been found. Two of our childrenhave expressed this state of mind in their ownwords.Bertram, three and three-quarters years old,said: "I don't like you, I don't like anybody!I only like myself". Ivan, five years old, exclaimed:"I am nobody's nothing".Mothers are commonly advised not to visittheir children during the first fortnight afterseparation. It is the common opinion thatthe pain of separation will then pass morequickly and cause less disturbance. In realityit is the very quickness of the child's break85
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•?mm
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WAR AND CHILDREN
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COPYRIGHT 194Jy»- ruALL RIGHTS RES
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The Foster Parents' Plan for War Ch
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of children has, therefore, little
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The Nurseries, further, give lodgin
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the significance of air raids. They
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The understanding of catastrophes,
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confused in her mind with the more
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gether in a play-pen will bite each
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fact that the destruction raging in
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them as far as they can understand
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fear in this manner and return, app
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they knew about its wickedness. It
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from danger and put them in surroun
Page 38 and 39: her mother's lack of fearnot develo
Page 40 and 41: dren. We have four examples, where
Page 42 and 43: urged to adapt themselves to a high
Page 44 and 45: oth qualities in the eyes of its ow
Page 46 and 47: misfits.They have in their position
Page 48 and 49: certainly more than the average ine
Page 50 and 51: Development of the Mother-Relations
Page 52 and 53: mother also at times when there is
Page 54 and 55: other people in the world besides i
Page 56 and 57: pleasure and avoid pain and discomf
Page 58 and 59: ooms, the position of the beds and
Page 60 and 61: Both sexes in this manner have thei
Page 62 and 63: only one main punishment for anybod
Page 64 and 65: not develop on quite the same lines
Page 66 and 67: the present. New ties are form Ther
Page 68 and 69: fine or even make a mental picture
Page 70 and 71: urn Road after their houses had bee
Page 72 and 73: i./?being used as bombs. Playing tr
Page 74 and 75: their pets, which they probably wou
Page 76 and 77: finite way of demonstrating the sce
Page 78 and 79: and narcissistic at the beginning o
Page 80 and 81: caused by neglect; it can, on the o
Page 82 and 83: tion of aggression due to the examp
Page 84 and 85: ig or small that loss may be, the f
Page 86 and 87: The second case, Sylvia, three and
Page 90 and 91: with the mother which contains all
Page 92 and 93: esidential homes these should be si
Page 95: The previous part of the book isbas
Page 98 and 99: AllayingFearEven children whose mot
Page 100 and 101: their children. They appreciate eve
Page 102 and 103: street next to the one in which she
Page 104 and 105: This same state of affairs continue
Page 106 and 107: went upstairs or downstairs,Patrick
Page 108 and 109: Blitz in September and October 1940
Page 110 and 111: ing underneath, tried to drop a hea
Page 112 and 113: more than a year her junior.Her lat
Page 114 and 115: whether this was the way in which s
Page 116 and 117: ditions was too short to make up fo
Page 118 and 119: or abnormal outcome seems to be the
Page 120 and 121: somehow included in it and soon bec
Page 122 and 123: een re-opened,excited much comment
Page 124 and 125: with an absent love object. We say
Page 126 and 127: PARENTS AND CHILDRENJune-July 1941S
Page 128 and 129: older children three and four years
Page 130 and 131: denied admission but he waited outs
Page 132 and 133: In addition to the story, he said h
Page 134 and 135: 1which used to belong to his parent
Page 136 and 137: porch leading down to terraced lawn
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Peter, whom he had brought from hom
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for them was no shock of any kind.
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and a half years of his life and th
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the children have not been informed
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some patient and careful work tomot
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withheld from the child and that th
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months thi9 was the period I was in
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of our own. This training scheme is
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COOKINGSEWINGTwo courses of two-hou
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tensive Christmas leave. Brenda, se
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mother's relationship remains more
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Ronny, seven years old, who takes v
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The step taken was the subdivision
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to them, reappeared as often as she
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April—July 1942CONFLICTING ATTITU
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y the doubt and worry whether she h
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But even with the best intentions t
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weekly and only a few less often. T
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The same feelings can also be expre
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Her unconscious wish against the ba
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ditions of normal family life. When
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up all precautions, which means tha
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—"Do you remember the first night
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When asked why he worried about thi
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She says: "Teacher says there are a
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away." Which means at this moment h
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parents. All these services were si
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I have seen other nursery schools d
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The mother relationship of the smal
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«MW fee Aarje, keek ms! be krwefc!
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