o_19kdfsn0q18e31dfraas1esh19vta.pdf

spouse's need to have the relationship safe and settled.
What Draws INTJs and SJs Together?
The Guardians are attracted to the INTJ's unorthodox perspective on the world, their intellectual
interests, and their bent for the abstract. They also appreciate the INTJ's commitment, loyalty and
integrity. INTJs, for their part, appreciate their Guardian partner's responsibility, work ethic, and
loyalty. Down-to-earth and socially skilled, the SJs provide a counterpoint to the INTJ's highly
abstract world. If left to their own devices, an INTJ might park themselves amidst a stack of
technical journals; the SJ spouse will add a family life and handle the social rituals that INTJs
would ordinarily neglect. 103 INTJs also appreciate the practical approach of their Guardian mates.
SJs and INTJs share a preference for an organized, structured life. They both want the house neat,
decisions to be quick and firm, and money to be saved, not spent. Both partners will be comfortable
making and keeping schedules, writing lists, and maintaining a routine.
The sensing/intuition difference means that INTJs are better at global planning, while SJs are better
at working out the step by step details that will be required to carry the plan out. For example,
when planning a family road trip, the INTJ will be most interested in deciding what the point of the
trip is and what locations are to be visited, while the SJ will be interested in what needs to be
packed, what route should be taken, where the family will be staying each night, etc. The INTJ can
give the SJ an eagle's eye view, while the SJ can provide the INTJs with an up-close view from
ground level. A microscope and telescope together can see more than either could alone.
Issues
INTJs and SJs may run into conflict when the INTJ wants to try a new, improved approach with
unknown side effects while the SJ would rather stick to a tried and true method of doing things. If
the INTJ can explain in detail what the rewards and risks of the new approach are, the SJ will be
more open to giving it a shot.
While INTJs like a clean house, they don't actually like cleaning. 104 Not that any type does, but as
Rationals, INTJs have a particularly low tolerance for repetitive, mundane tasks. If possible, they
will leave these duties to their partner, especially if the INTJ is a male and the SJ is a female. But
SJs do not like getting saddled with all the boring stuff either, so a fair division of labor will have to
established to prevent resentment.
Gifts
Guardians like traditional courtship presents: flowers, chocolates, etc. 105 SJ men tend to appreciate
pragmatic gifts, while SJ women favor gifts that are beautiful and tasteful enough that they have the
potential to become family heirlooms (read here). 106 Essentially, anything that will have sentimental
value down the road is good. However, be aware that spending too much can make Guardians
nervous; they are the temperament least interested in big, spendy gifts. If a Guardian makes a list
(and as Judgers, they probably will), be sure to get them what they ask for. They are the
temperament that most appreciates list-based giving; they are also the temperament that most wants
you to write down what you want on a list. The element of surprise is not really appreciated by SJs.
They are also disinterested in handmade gifts.
103 Keirsey, 1998
104 Tieger & Barron-Tieger, 2000
105 Keirsey, 1998
106 Parent, n.d.