o_19kdfsn0q18e31dfraas1esh19vta.pdf

wished to improve and ennoble you.
“This noble kindness pleases you, does it not? Very well, then you must act in the same manner. ‘What you wish
that people should do to you, you must do first to them!’
“To tell the truth, to tell it in a harsh and provoking manner, to be severely just and painfully search out the faults of
your fellowman, or even reprove him for them, without any particular reason for it, in the presence of others, is far
removed from being good, yet being good is something unspeakably beautiful, for we call for this very reason the
sum of all perfection ‘God,” that is, ‘Good.’ You, too, my child, wish to become like God. If you do, you must
perfect yourself as much as possible. Above all, do not forget to be good.”
I am sure that by that time Karl would have promised, with tears of contrition, never again to pain a person in that
manner, and I am convinced that only human, more particularly childish, weakness could ever have led him to do so.
But for my purpose I will assume that, none the less, he will retort, “Shall I tell an untruth?” Assuming this, I would
have replied:
“Not in the least! For then you would be lying or be a hypocrite. But there is no need of all that. All you have to do
is to keep quiet. It would, indeed, be a sad life for you, for me, and for all men, if everybody were to search out the
faults or foibles of his acquaintances, and ruthlessly tell of them before others. That would be an eternal war of all
against all, for no man is without faults. No one would be at rest. Everybody would have to be constantly on the
watch, in order to strike or to protect himself. Would that be living with each other as men, as Christians, as
children of one father, as representatives of the highest Good?”
But I do the poor boy an injustice. It may be that I have told him all that, but, I am sure, never at one time, for so
much was not necessary to cause him to perceive, regret, and mend faults against morality or piety. I have, however,
forgotten to mention that I would also have told him some appropriate story [to illustrate the point]...
Through logic and principle, this father explained to his son why he should not behave in this
manner rather than merely saying not to do it. It is always good to tell an INTJ child the reason
behind a rule.
When an INTJ Child Does Well
INTJs are one of the types most likely to be described as intelligent (in the popular sense of the
term). Suppose that an INTJ does effortlessly well on a test or project. It is only natural for a
parent to compliment their offspring on their intelligence and natural ability. But believe it or not,
this is not really good practice.
Researchers took two groups of fifth graders and had them take a test (read here). 235 Regardless of
actual score, the children were told that they had done well and achieved a really high grade—at
least an 80%. One group was told, “You must be smart at these problems.” The other group was
told, “You must have worked hard at these problems.”
The children were then asked to choose the difficulty level of the next test they would like to take.
The difficulty levels were described as follows: “Problems that aren't too hard, so I don't get many
wrong;” “Problems that are pretty easy, so I'll do well;” “Problems that I'm pretty good at, so that I
can show I'm smart;” and “Problems that I'll learn a lot from, even if I won't look so smart.” The
first three choices allow the child the safety of guaranteed success, while the fourth choice presents
a risk that they could end up looking bad.
After indicating the difficulty level they would prefer, the children were told that if there was time,
they could pursue their problems of interest; however, at the moment they would be given another
235 Mueller & Dweck, 1998