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No-Tears Naps<br />

Nap in a snap … 3 simple steps to quality nap times for baby and toddler<br />

by Heidi Holvoet<br />

Baby-Sleep-Advice.com<br />

Contact<br />

e-publish@baby-sleep-advice.com<br />

Copyright notice<br />

Copyright 2011 by Heidi Holvoet – Baby-Sleep-Advice.com<br />

All rights reserved.<br />

Disclaimer<br />

All content in this book is for information purposes only. The author is not a medical professional and does not give medical advice.<br />

Always use your own judgment and contact your doctor or health adviser if you have any concern about your child's health.


Table of Contents<br />

Chapter 1. Introduction.................................................................................... 4<br />

Why naps are so important.............................................................................5<br />

How many naps and for how long....................................................................6<br />

Chapter 2. Three Nap routines............................................................................9<br />

“The clock” - Timed nap schedule..................................................................10<br />

“EPS/ESP” - Pattern nap routine.................................................................... 11<br />

“Baby rules” - Baby-centered nap routine........................................................13<br />

Chapter 3. Three Steps to Nap in a Snap..............................................................15<br />

Step 1 – Discover your baby's nap needs...........................................................16<br />

Step 2 – Choose your baby's nap routine..........................................................20<br />

Step 3 – Install your baby's best nap routine......................................................22<br />

Chapter 4. Settling for naps..............................................................................27<br />

The Baby Sling Trick....................................................................................27<br />

Chapter 5. The Nap Tips List.............................................................................30<br />

Chapter 6. Problem solving.............................................................................. 37<br />

Chapter 7. Appendix: Sleepy Signs Journal...........................................................42<br />

Chapter 8. About the author.............................................................................46<br />

Chapter 9. More books by Heidi Holvoet.............................................................. 48<br />

page 3


Nap in a Snap<br />

Chapter 1. Introduction<br />

N<br />

apping is crucial for your baby's sleep and general health. A good nap routine for<br />

baby also makes your days more pleasant and relaxed.<br />

This guide gives you the necessary step-by-step techniques to find and keep the best<br />

nap routine to fit your baby and yourself.<br />

How to use this step-by-step guide<br />

If you want to know all the ins and outs of successful naps, it's best to read from A to<br />

Z completely. Then come back and browse the info you need in any specific situation.<br />

If you're starting afresh – newborn baby, had no nap routine at all so far or want to<br />

make a new start at any point – get started with the “Three Steps to Nap in a Snap”<br />

on page 15. Continue with sections “Settling for naps” and “The Nap Tips List” right<br />

after that to add proven tips and techniques to your nap plan.<br />

Do you already have the right routine in mind but it's not working yet Go to “Step 3 –<br />

Install your baby's best nap routine” on page 22 and read on from there.<br />

If you have a specific issue with napping go straight to the “Problem solving” section<br />

on page 37. You will then find your way through the other sections as necessary for<br />

your situation.<br />

Short for time If you don't have the time or do not want to go through the process of<br />

finding your baby's nap routine that is alright. The timed schedule is then the best<br />

option. It works well for most babies and toddlers. Go for the timed schedule, starting<br />

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Nap in a Snap<br />

from page 10.<br />

Why naps are so important<br />

Good regular naps help your baby<br />

• be happy and relaxed throughout the day<br />

• sleep the best possible nights<br />

• establish a healthy sleep routine that lasts a lifetime<br />

Content all day …<br />

Depending on her age, your baby needs one or several rest moments to get her<br />

through the day happy and relaxed. If she stays up for too long she will become tired<br />

at first, and over-tired soon after that.<br />

A tired baby, and even more so an over-tired baby is not content. She will be fussy,<br />

cranky and may cry for no apparent reason. On top of that, being over-tired makes it<br />

much more difficult to settle for sleep.<br />

Being well-rested also promotes general health.<br />

… sleeping well at night<br />

Regular naps improve sleep at night.<br />

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Nap in a Snap<br />

A baby who is not over-tired when starting the night will<br />

• settle more easily<br />

• sleep more restfully<br />

• sleep for longer stretches<br />

How many naps and for how long<br />

Nap frequency and duration depend on baby's<br />

• age<br />

• personality and personal physical sleep needs<br />

• feeding and activity schedule<br />

Ideally, baby naps exactly as often and as long as she needs.<br />

The key to that is finding out what she needs and what works just right for her. The<br />

“Three Steps to Nap in a Snap” starting on page 15, help you do exactly that.<br />

How much napping is enough<br />

The single best way to know if your baby is napping enough is to simply observe her.<br />

If your baby, when healthy,<br />

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Nap in a Snap<br />

• is happy, alert and active most of the time<br />

• settles without too much difficulty<br />

• wakes up refreshed after a nap<br />

then you can be quite sure that she is getting enough sleep.<br />

Let's add a few average numbers to complete your picture of typical nap needs.<br />

Average nap frequency and duration<br />

Alongside observing your baby, checking the average nap frequency and duration for<br />

your baby's age can be a helping guideline as well.<br />

To give you an idea of what to expect,<br />

Table 1 gives an overview of average<br />

naps a day and nap duration at<br />

different ages.<br />

But please do not worry if your baby is<br />

off from the numbers in the table. As<br />

with all numbers related to babies,<br />

take them with a grain of salt.<br />

In fact, observing your baby gives a<br />

About the numbers …<br />

The numbers in Table 1 are correct as statistical<br />

averages.<br />

That means we must be aware that average means that<br />

many babies more or less fit that number.<br />

But it also means that many (!) babies still deviate from<br />

the average, and often quite a lot.<br />

Your baby may take two 1-hour naps a day if the<br />

average is three 2-hour naps and that may be perfect<br />

for her.<br />

more reliable indication of how many naps she needs. That is exactly what we will do<br />

further on in this guide.<br />

Just use the averages here as a good-to-know backup.<br />

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Nap in a Snap<br />

Baby's age Naps a day Nap length<br />

0-1 months 3 - 5 1h - 3h<br />

1-3 months 3 - 4 1h - 3h<br />

3-6 months 2 - 3 1h - 3h<br />

6-12 months 1 - 3 1h - 2h<br />

12-18 months 1 - 2 1h - 2h<br />

+18 months 0 - 1 1h - 3h<br />

TABLE 1: AVERAGE NAP FREQUENCY AND DURATION BY AGE<br />

page 8


Nap in a Snap<br />

Chapter 2. Three Nap routines<br />

Should you set up a timed schedule for your baby<br />

Use a pattern routine<br />

Or follow baby's lead completely<br />

How often and how long should she nap<br />

I<br />

t would be easy if there were a single one-fits-all best nap routine for babies, but<br />

there isn't.<br />

With nap routine we mean the type of schedule (time or pattern based) and when and<br />

for how long baby naps.<br />

Is it necessary to have 'a' routine<br />

Absolutely, a good nap routine gives regularity and recognizability: two aspects that<br />

physically help baby's body settle and sleep well.<br />

Even if that routine is flexible.<br />

Baby's ideal nap routine depends on her age, personality, maturity, physical condition<br />

and abilities, sleep habits, ... and also on your own personality and daily activities.<br />

So no prefab nap routine (“must be on schedule”, “must let baby decide when to<br />

nap”, …) is guaranteed to work for your own baby.<br />

page 9


Nap in a Snap<br />

The 3 steps in the next section, “Three Steps to Nap in a Snap” (starts on page 15),<br />

help you find the nap routine that fits your baby best. We then fine-tune it to suit<br />

your baby's needs exactly.<br />

But first, let's have a look at each of the 3 different nap routines: “The Clock”,<br />

“EPS/ESP” and “Baby Rules”.<br />

“The clock” - Timed nap schedule<br />

A timed nap schedule is when you as a parent set fixed naps at specific times during<br />

the day.<br />

For example naps at 10am and 2pm, or 9am, 1pm and 4pm, ...<br />

There is normally room to stretch the times a bit to earlier and later. But when first<br />

setting the schedule, you may need to stick to the times within 5-10 minutes so baby<br />

benefits maximally from the schedule.<br />

You repeat the same schedule every day. Your baby will usually also have a set night<br />

time bedtime.<br />

Pros<br />

• Once the routine set, baby's body becomes physically used to sleeping at the<br />

specific times. Settling is easier and baby sleeps more restfully.<br />

• With baby on a timed schedule, it is easier for you to plan your day for other activities and<br />

family members.<br />

page 10


Nap in a Snap<br />

Cons<br />

• You are 'stuck' with these nap times and your days may be less flexible to plan<br />

in some situations.<br />

• Baby's nap needs change from time to time so you must stay alert to adapt the<br />

times when necessary.<br />

“EPS/ESP” - Pattern nap routine<br />

EPS = EAT PLAY SLEEP<br />

or ESP = EAT SLEEP PLAY<br />

With a pattern nap routine you do not set baby on a clock but go through the day in<br />

several cycles of eating, playing and sleeping.<br />

EPS: When your baby wakes up, in the morning or after a nap, you feed her (EAT).<br />

Then there is PLAY time: your baby is awake and active. Once readily tired, she is<br />

ready to SLEEP.<br />

- or -<br />

ESP: After having been active and awake, it is time to EAT. A short time to digest a bit<br />

an then baby is ready to SLEEP. When she wakes up, there is time to be active and<br />

PLAY.<br />

page 11


Nap in a Snap<br />

Pros<br />

• Once established and consistently respected daily, this routine is easily<br />

recognized by baby. It helps regulate her days and recognize bedtimes as well.<br />

This in turn helps with self soothing.<br />

• Because a pattern is based on baby's natural rhythm, it is usually well adapted<br />

to her needs. And so it automatically adjusts to her changing needs. This is a<br />

great pro for you: no need to worry if you ought to change things around.<br />

• You keep quite some flexibility to arrange your days.<br />

Cons<br />

• Settling can be difficult. Going to sleep at irregular times is not easy for many<br />

babies, especially for those who struggle to self soothe.<br />

• Your days can be quite unpredictable so it may be tricky to plan your own<br />

activities.<br />

• There is a risk of ending up going through this pattern too often in one day. You<br />

will have to be careful to avoid a cycle of short feeds, short naps, short awake<br />

times.<br />

page 12


Nap in a Snap<br />

“Baby rules” - Baby-centered nap routine<br />

You can opt to follow your baby's lead completely. That means you do not impose any<br />

schedule nor do you use a set sleep-eat-play pattern. You simply observe and put your<br />

baby down to sleep whenever you feel is is necessary.<br />

This can work out really well if it fits your personality well and if your baby sleeps<br />

very easily.<br />

It can also be a very good experiment if you have been struggling to fit baby in any<br />

kind of schedule without success.<br />

Observing your baby is key to the success of this method. It's also important to offer<br />

enough opportunity for your baby to nap so she gets the rest she needs.<br />

Pros<br />

• This routine is neatly adapted to your baby's needs. And it automatically<br />

evolves when those needs change, no need for you to step in.<br />

• You have quite some flexibility to arrange your days.<br />

Cons<br />

• The flexibility implies unpredictability as well. That may make it more difficult<br />

to schedule your day with set activities. For example, baby might need a nap<br />

just when you have to take an older sibling swimming.<br />

page 13


Nap in a Snap<br />

• Unless your baby is extremely good at self soothing, the irregular nap times<br />

make it harder to settle.<br />

page 14


Nap in a Snap<br />

Chapter 3. Three Steps to Nap in a Snap<br />

Are you just starting to arrange a regular nap routine for your baby<br />

Tried different things but can't get good naps<br />

Did your baby or toddler suddenly stop napping well<br />

Either way, with the 3 steps below you will find and fine-tune the best routine for<br />

your child.<br />

Here we go ...<br />

Step 1 Discover your baby's nap needs<br />

Step 2 Choose your baby's nap routine<br />

Step 3 Install baby's naps<br />

Take your time …<br />

One remark before we start: although you may be in a hurry to get things fixed for your baby, you will get the<br />

best, long lasting, results if you take the time to do things right.<br />

Give yourselves at least a week to get used to a new routine, allowing more time to let your baby settle to it<br />

completely.<br />

page 15


Nap in a Snap<br />

Step 1 – Discover your baby's nap needs<br />

The first step is to find out what type of routine your baby needs and when and for<br />

how long she needs to nap.<br />

For this we combine two types of information:<br />

• typical nap routines by age<br />

• baby's behavior<br />

Typical nap routines by age<br />

A newborn baby typically follows a natural pattern of sleep-feed-sleep-feed-...<br />

Forcing baby into a timed schedule usually makes little sense now.<br />

The consistency from feeding after waking and going back down after some awake<br />

time and a diaper change gives baby enough regularity to help her sleep well.<br />

Between 1 and 4 months old your baby spends more and more time awake. A simple<br />

pattern routine of ESP (Eat-Sleep-Play) or EPS (Eat-Play-Sleep) often works best now.<br />

Many babies also respond well to a gently introduced timed schedule, if it is flexible<br />

enough to keep fitting baby's changing needs.<br />

From 4 months onwards a timed schedule fits most babies best. The consistent<br />

regularity helps their bodies and minds adjust to settle easily and sleep the longest<br />

possible stretches.<br />

page 16


Nap in a Snap<br />

Observing your child – Use the Sleepy Signs Journal<br />

To get a good detailed idea of what your baby or toddler needs, take a couple of days<br />

to observe her when awake. During these observation days, keep a journal.<br />

Keeping the journal is made easy with the free Android app or the template enclosed<br />

at the end of this guide, see the Appendix Sleepy Signs Journal for details. Record<br />

when she sleeps, how she was right before a nap, any sleepy signs through the day, …<br />

Pay specific attention to sleepy signs. Table 2 has the typical sleepy signs for the<br />

different sleepy states, i.e. how tired is baby when showing this or that sleepy sign …<br />

Use these in the journal.<br />

What if it doesn't work<br />

I explicitly advise you to actually use the log and<br />

record your findings (in writing or on your mobile<br />

device).<br />

It takes a little extra effort but it is amazingly helpful.<br />

I know it would be easier to just remember but only<br />

when written/recorded will you have the overview<br />

and details you need.<br />

What if you rarely see any sleepy<br />

signs in your baby … until she's<br />

cranky with over-tiredness<br />

Don't worry, it's not your fault, some<br />

babies just don't show the signs<br />

clearly.<br />

If that is your case, I advise you to<br />

use a timed nap schedule (see page<br />

10).<br />

Remember that not all babies show the same clear signs timely. Your baby may seem<br />

perfectly OK one moment - then be all cranky and tired the next.<br />

Keep observing her closely, you will learn to spot the early sleepy signs. Writing things<br />

down in the journal helps a lot too.<br />

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Nap in a Snap<br />

Baby is ...<br />

Happily awake<br />

Sleepy Signs<br />

Content, relaxed, playing,<br />

communicating, smiling, ...<br />

Almost tired<br />

Staring, less interested in what's going on around her,<br />

less interested in playing<br />

Readily tired<br />

Over-tired<br />

First yawns, rubbing eyes, lost interest in playing and<br />

surroundings<br />

Fussy, cranky, over-active, can't find a comfortable<br />

position, not happy, crying for no other apparent reason<br />

(hunger, discomfort, scared, ...)<br />

TABLE 2: HOW TO RECOGNIZE AND UNDERSTAND BABY'S SLEEPY SIGNS<br />

Once you have the Sleepy Signs Journal of a few days take a moment to go through it<br />

carefully.<br />

What you mainly want to learn from your journal is:<br />

• How much time baby spends napping<br />

Simply count the total amount of quiet time during the day. That includes<br />

sleeping in the crib/bed, stroller, sling and in your arms.<br />

• Which type of nap routine seems to work best<br />

From your journal, you will find your baby closest to one of these three<br />

situations:<br />

1. On time : your baby seems to be tired at more or less fixed times every<br />

day. You could almost set your clock: for example tired at 10am, noon,<br />

3pm and 7pm.<br />

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Nap in a Snap<br />

2. In a pattern : no fixed times but after being awake for a given time, your<br />

baby is tired. For example, 3 hours after waking she is ready to sleep<br />

again. This may also vary during the day, such as 3 hours awake time in<br />

the morning, 2 hours maximum in the afternoon.<br />

3. Irregular : you do not see any regularity in your baby's daily awake and<br />

sleepy times.<br />

Finally, take a moment to think about your own preference. If all was equal for your<br />

baby, which type of daily routine would you prefer Strictly timed, not timed at all,<br />

predictable or come as it may, …<br />

You will also want to consider older siblings' schedules, work or social duties, …<br />

Then, with the information gathered in this step, it's on to the next one: choosing<br />

your best-fit nap routine.<br />

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Nap in a Snap<br />

Step 2 – Choose your baby's nap routine<br />

This is the step where you decide on your best-fit nap routine. Don't feel stressed<br />

about picking one though. No choice has to be definitive and you can always come<br />

back to readjust if necessary.<br />

As a reminder, the 3 nap routine types are “The Clock”, “EPS/ESP” and “Baby rules”.<br />

With “The Clock” your baby naps at the same set times each day. “EPS/ESP” takes it<br />

regularity from following the same pattern of activities throughout the day. With<br />

“Baby rules” you follow baby's lead completely: she'll nap when she needs to and lets<br />

you know.<br />

See section “Three Nap routines” (starts on page 9) for details, pros and cons for each<br />

routine.<br />

To choose your routine: ask yourself<br />

Does the Sleepy Signs Journal show a clear pattern<br />

YES The Sleepy Signs Journal shows a clear pattern<br />

If you find a nice clear preference for one of the three situations described on the<br />

previous page, then your choice is easy.<br />

Go for “The Clock” if your baby is typically on time. Go for “EPS/ESP” if you do not<br />

see timed regularity, but a recurring pattern.<br />

If your baby seems irregular but settles easily and you easily catch her sleepy signs,<br />

page 20


Nap in a Snap<br />

“Baby Rules” will be your a good choice for you.<br />

You can skip the rest of this section and go straight to “Step 3 – Install your baby's<br />

best nap routine” on page 22.<br />

NO The Sleepy Signs Journal does not show a clear pattern<br />

If the journal does not show a clear preference for any one of the 3 routines, by lack<br />

of clear sleepy signs or if she does not manage to sleep during the day at all:<br />

• If your baby is newborn, say under 4-6 weeks old, a pattern routine with<br />

“EPS/ESP” will be the best choice. But go for “Baby Rules” if that feels better<br />

to you. At this age it will be very close to the pattern routine anyway.<br />

• Under 4 months old, use “EPS/ESP”. If you are personally more inclined to<br />

having a stricter schedule, a gently introduced “The Clock” is good too. Use<br />

“Baby rules” only if your baby settles very easily .<br />

• From 4 months and older, introduce a timed schedule, “The Clock”.<br />

• At any age, if you have been struggling with the routine you have right now:<br />

switch to a different one. Say you've been trying a strictly timed schedule<br />

without success, changing to a more flexible “EPS/ESP” pattern routine can<br />

make a huge difference.<br />

page 21


Nap in a Snap<br />

Step 3 – Install your baby's best nap routine<br />

Here's how to guide your baby into the routine you have chosen above. The next<br />

section will then help you further with settling baby to sleep.<br />

“The Clock” - Timed nap schedule<br />

If your baby shows clear sleepy signs at more or less regular times, setting up the<br />

timed nap schedule is easy. You simply use her sleepy times as nap times.<br />

Most important is to prepare for the nap as soon as baby is “almost tired” so she is in<br />

bed by the time she is “readily tired”. This makes it easiest for her to catch sleep and<br />

sleep the longest.<br />

If your baby does not show clear sleepy signs, the timed schedule can be a great help<br />

for both of you. You will choose the nap times yourself and then fine-tune as you go.<br />

How First pin down the nap times:<br />

• Under 6 months old: 1 mid-morning, 1 early afternoon and 1 mid-to-late<br />

afternoon. If 3 naps seems awfully much for your baby, have just 1 mid-morning<br />

and 1 mid-afternoon nap.<br />

• From 6 to 12 months old: 1 mid-morning and 1 mid-afternoon nap.<br />

• From 12 months onward: 1 mid-afternoon nap.<br />

page 22


Nap in a Snap<br />

Even without the clear sleepy signs, do base the precise times on your baby's behavior<br />

as much as possible.<br />

Write down the times (for example 10am, 1pm and 4pm). It will help you arrange and<br />

keep up with the schedule.<br />

Then as you start putting your baby down for naps at these times, see how it goes. If<br />

your baby has trouble settling, she may simply be too tired. Then shift that nap to<br />

earlier.<br />

If she may on the contrary not be tired at all: playing nicely (but not over-actively)<br />

and content. Then shift that nap to a bit later, 15-20 minutes and see how it goes.<br />

Fine-tune your timed schedule like this until it works. Always give each experiment at<br />

least 4-5 days: baby needs time to adjust and set to it.<br />

How strict should you be If you are just starting out with a (new) timed schedule, it's<br />

best to be quite strict. Nap times within 5-10 minutes of the set time are ideal to help<br />

baby get used to the schedule.<br />

Once the schedule runs well, you will have more flexibility. Most depends on your<br />

baby though: some will need the strictest schedule always, others do well as long as<br />

nap is 'near' the scheduled time.<br />

How does the timed schedule evolve Once the timed schedule is set, you may get the<br />

impression that she seems less tired by nap time. Or not tired at all. In that case, do<br />

not give up on the current schedule too quickly, thinking it needs a change.<br />

Most probably it simply shows that your baby is thriving on the schedule. Even if she<br />

has a few days when she does not sleep so easily or as long as usual.<br />

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Nap in a Snap<br />

Sticking to the schedule is by far the best to keep baby on track, also in times of<br />

illness, teething or other sleep disturbances. As soon as the discomfort is relieved she<br />

will go back to sleeping well again, much helped by the regularity of the schedule.<br />

There can – and will – be a need for change every now and then. If you notice that<br />

your baby naps poorly consistently for 1-2 weeks or wakes up crying and upset after<br />

each nap then you may need to adjust the schedule.<br />

You may need to skip a nap (go from 2 to 1 naps for example), or simply shift one to<br />

earlier or later. You will know by observing your child very closely again. Use the<br />

Sleepy Signs Journal again to help you with that.<br />

page 24


Nap in a Snap<br />

“EPS/ESP” - Pattern nap routine<br />

If you choose a pattern nap routine, baby goes through cycles of Eat-Play-Sleep or<br />

Eat-Sleep-Play all day.<br />

Every sleep moment is a nap. Setting up the routine is easy. Just make a habit of<br />

feeding right after baby wakes, and then let her play before the next nap.<br />

Or you feed right before the nap (typical when nursing to sleep) and then consistently<br />

let her play, or have any other awake activity, before the next meal.<br />

Keep a very close eye on baby's behavior to avoid over-tiredness at all cost (see Table<br />

2). When baby is “almost tired” it is time to prepare for the nap (diaper change,<br />

bedtime routine, ...). “Readily tired” is when she should be down in the crib/bed as<br />

that is easiest for settling.<br />

How does the pattern nap routine evolve The pattern routine automatically adjusts<br />

to your baby's changing needs of feeding and sleeping.<br />

As your baby grows, typically from 4-6 months onwards, her days become more and<br />

more regular. You will then most easily move to a timed schedule (see above). But of<br />

course there is no 'must do' here. As long as your baby naps well on the pattern<br />

routine there is no hurry to change things over.<br />

page 25


Nap in a Snap<br />

“Baby Rules” - Baby-centered routine<br />

The baby-centered routine needs not much setting up. You simply follow your baby's<br />

lead and put her down for a nap when she is “readily tired”. That can be at different<br />

times every day and for a different amount of naps.<br />

One trap you do want to avoid is putting baby down for too many short naps. Five 1-<br />

hour naps can still work out for baby and give her the rest she needs. But if you find<br />

yourself with 6 or more half-hour naps then you may need to guide baby towards<br />

fewer, longer naps.<br />

How does the baby-centered routine evolve As long as both you and your baby are<br />

happy with the routine there is no need to change it around.<br />

If you notice that baby's sleep, also at night, becomes poorer – and it's not because of<br />

an illness or teething – it may be time for a more structured routine like a pattern<br />

routine or a timed schedule (see above, page 9).<br />

The next section gives you techniques to help your baby actually settle for sleep in<br />

her nap routine.<br />

page 26


Nap in a Snap<br />

Chapter 4. Settling for naps<br />

T<br />

he right nap routine is the best guarantee to help your baby settle and sleep<br />

well at naps. The regularity and recognizability truly help baby with this, both<br />

physically and mentally.<br />

But if you are just starting out, your baby may not simply go down and sleep at nap<br />

time.<br />

She may not have learned to self soothe yet or her sleep patterns may not be welladapted<br />

yet.<br />

Once your baby is 6-7 months and older, you will want to work on self soothing with<br />

her. You can start earlier of course. Do not expect much before 4 months though<br />

unless your baby is a natural self soother. At any age, progressive gentle self soothing<br />

techniques are most efficient.<br />

At any time when self soothing is not a success yet, my “Baby Sling Trick” is a<br />

powerful technique to help your baby settle for regular naps.<br />

The Baby Sling Trick<br />

The Baby Sling Trick is named after its original version, using a baby sling. But you can<br />

do it with any carrier that is comfortable and safe for baby to sleep in while being on<br />

the move, like a good stroller or car seat.<br />

You can use it at any age when your baby has a hard time settling for naps. For a<br />

newborn and up to 2-3 months though it does not make much sense as baby's daily<br />

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Nap in a Snap<br />

schedule is still too erratic. But from 4 months and up is good.<br />

The idea is to help your baby settle at the chosen nap moments following your chosen<br />

nap routine. Not forever, but for a week or two, enough to help your baby's body get<br />

used to sleeping at these moments. Once the routine is set, it is much easier to settle<br />

in the crib/bed by herself.<br />

How to ...<br />

How to get started: work with the 3 steps in the sections above to set up your baby's<br />

nap routine. When a nap is coming up, put baby in the sling, stroller, car seat, … and<br />

go out for a walk or a drive.<br />

If you choose to use the sling, you can also stay at home and get some chores done.<br />

You just want to be moving when baby needs to settle, and also at half-awake<br />

moments to help keep her asleep.<br />

These are your 2 aims:<br />

• Help baby settle,<br />

• Get baby through from the first to the second sleep cycle.<br />

In-between sleep cycles, there is a brief half-awake moment. It is a fragile moment at<br />

which a baby who is not used to sleeping through it, easily awakes.<br />

Being on the move around that moment is a top technique to keep baby asleep. Doing<br />

it regularly helps teach baby's body to sleep from one cycle to the next.<br />

You can do this at every nap time but if there are 2 or more a day that may not be<br />

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Nap in a Snap<br />

practical.<br />

Then you can pick one nap, the same one every day, and go for the walk or drive<br />

then.<br />

At the other nap(s), practice putting baby down in the crib/bed. Help her settle<br />

and/or work with the self soothing method mentioned above. The combination of the<br />

Baby Sling Trick with self soothing practice will give the very best results in the end –<br />

given your baby is at least 4 to 6 months old<br />

Do the moving-at-nap-time consistently for at least a week to two weeks. Then start<br />

putting baby in the crib/bed again at that specific nap time. Settling and sleeping for<br />

longer should now have become easier.<br />

You can make the smoothest transition by alternating sling with crib/bed daily at<br />

first, then stick to the crib/bed more and more often.<br />

If you see little improvement, give it a rest for a good week and then try again.<br />

Spoiling baby<br />

Many parents are a bit reluctant to carry their child too much for fear of spoiling. But<br />

if you are careful and do not exaggerate there is little risk.<br />

Remember that experts agree that a baby is not spoilt until at least 8 months old. Yes<br />

she can get used to certain habits but when guided well, she can easily transition out<br />

of them again. There is not “bad” spoiling.<br />

When doing the Baby Sling Trick, just keep in mind to also give your baby plenty of<br />

opportunity to practice sleeping in the crib/bed as well, at other naps or at night.<br />

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Nap in a Snap<br />

Chapter 5. The Nap Tips List<br />

A Baby's naps will only improve.<br />

pply as many of the practical tips in this list as suit your baby and your situation.<br />

1. A BEDTIME ROUTINE<br />

At any age, have a bedtime routine before every sleep moment. If you do not have a<br />

set always-the-same bedtime routine that is fun and relaxing for baby and you, get<br />

started with one now.<br />

Whether for naps or night time, a bedtime routine is a crucial help for your baby to<br />

settle for a good sleep. Baby recognizes the routine and becomes used to<br />

doing/hearing the same things right before sleeping. That physically helps her settle.<br />

A bedtime routine is a set of actions and words you go through each time you put baby<br />

to bed. It typically includes announcing bedtime, changing diapers and clothes,<br />

walking and talking softly towards the bedroom, a lullaby and a kiss goodnight.<br />

Make sure to include something fun and interesting for your baby, without exciting her<br />

too much. This can be her favorite lullaby, a kiss goodnight to a favorite toy, …<br />

Remember to keep it short, 5-10 minutes, with a clear beginning and end.<br />

What if baby does not self soothe yet A bedtime routine is just as important, if not<br />

more important, if your baby does not settle all by herself yet. Maybe you nurse or<br />

rock her to sleep, or use the Baby Sling Trick (see higher).<br />

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Nap in a Snap<br />

Simply go through the bedtime routine right before you start nursing, rocking,<br />

walking, … This way baby automatically comes to link the bedtime routine with<br />

sleeping. And that will be the biggest help for self settling later on.<br />

2. PRACTICE SELF SOOTHING<br />

Self soothing is not only important for baby to settle independently when going down<br />

for a nap. It is also crucial to sleep for a decent, longer nap, because she can then<br />

sleep through brief half-awake moments.<br />

So when your baby is 4 months old, and definitely from 6-7 months, practice self<br />

soothing regularly, even if you usually hold or rock baby to sleep. Follow the<br />

guidelines in part 1 of this book for best results.<br />

3. SAME PLACE, SAME ENVIRONMENT<br />

Napping is easiest for baby if she recognizes her sleep environment. The same room,<br />

same crib/bed, same toys and decoration, …<br />

So it is best to put baby down for naps in the same place every time. This can be the<br />

same as for nights, but it can also be different. Some parents take to the habit of<br />

having baby sleep in the living room for naps, then in the bedroom for nights. That<br />

can work well too.<br />

If you are on the move – traveling or visiting friends or family – mimic baby's home<br />

situation as much as possible. Even simply taking the musical mobile and the favorite<br />

soft animal can be enough.<br />

Of course, wherever you are, do the same bedtime routine as at home too.<br />

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Nap in a Snap<br />

4. LIGHT OR DARK<br />

If your baby is under 3 months and still working to adjust to a regular day/night<br />

rhythm, it's a good idea to have her nap in a room that is not completely dark. This<br />

helps encourage the daily rhythm of sleeping more at night and being more awake<br />

during the day. See The Complete Newborn Sleep Guide for full details on how to<br />

encourage this rhythm.<br />

Once your baby has a good rhythm set, or simply sleeps better in the dark, it is fine to<br />

have her nap in a darkened room similar to at night.<br />

5. BURPING TIME, BURP IN TIME<br />

If you feed baby right before a nap make sure there is enough time to burp if<br />

necessary. A few minutes of sitting up and a diaper change are usually enough.<br />

Even if you nurse baby to sleep, hold for upright and move a little to make sure she<br />

can burp if necessary.<br />

6. A DRY DIAPER<br />

A wet diaper is a very common cause of waking up early from a nap. So it is a good<br />

idea to change the diaper right before, or as close to, the nap as possible. A clean dry<br />

feel makes baby most comfortable and gives the best chances for a longer restful nap.<br />

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Nap in a Snap<br />

7. THE IDEAL NAP ROUTINE<br />

If you have followed the steps in this guide you must have found the best nap routine<br />

for your baby right now. Sticking to it consistently will give the best naps.<br />

Avoid giving up too quickly: a couple of lesser days are usually not due to the nap<br />

routine.<br />

Teething, illness and the likes can all cause the poorer sleep. In fact, it is sticking to<br />

the regular routine that will give baby the best chances to go back to sleeping well<br />

once the disturbance has past.<br />

But still, it is good to allow some flexibility too. Trust your instincts and keep<br />

observing baby's needs: that will help you adjust her nap routine if necessary.<br />

8. GIVE BABY TIME<br />

Give baby, and yourself, time to adjust to a new nap routine or any other change you<br />

make.<br />

As a rule of thumb, give everything you try at least 3-5 days and a week or more for<br />

bigger changes, like a completely new schedule.<br />

Teaching your baby to sleep well is not a quick fix – it is long term results that we are<br />

working on. And these are more than worth some patience.<br />

9. KEEP THE JOURNAL<br />

I know it would be easier to skip the journal but writing down your baby's sleepy signs<br />

in the sleep journal is very important. You will learn more from it than you expect.<br />

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Nap in a Snap<br />

See the section “Step 1 – Discover your baby's nap needs” on page 16, for full details.<br />

10. QUICK-PICK NAP ROUTINE<br />

If you don't have the time or do not want to go through the 3 steps completely: go for<br />

the timed nap routine (see page 10). It is the all-time favorite that works for most<br />

babies and gives the most consistent results. Under 4 months old it may still be a bit<br />

unstable, but later on it's a winner.<br />

Also: if in doubt, go for “The Clock”.<br />

11. MAKE ROOM FOR THE ROUTINE<br />

When first establishing a new routine: arrange your day around it, not vice-versa.<br />

That may mean that you have to skip a weekly playgroup, siblings activities or a<br />

planned shopping trip …<br />

Don't worry, it's only temporary. Consistency is key and may be the only way to make a<br />

new routine work. But once your baby is well used to the routine there is room for<br />

more flexibility.<br />

12. DUMMY SELF-SERVICE<br />

If your baby has a pacifier to sleep, start teaching her to put it back in from a very<br />

young age.<br />

Do this by playing a game: baby has to find the dummy and you cheer enthusiastically<br />

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Nap in a Snap<br />

for her to put it back in all alone. You can also hide the dummy a bit so it also<br />

becomes a hide-and-seek game ... This is all perfect practice for later on when,<br />

during a nap or at night, the dummy falls out.<br />

13. I LOVE MY CRIB!<br />

Make your baby's sleeping environment fun and pleasant. That does not mean it has to<br />

be full of toys. A simple soft decoration with a few (soft) toys and a musical mobile<br />

are perfect.<br />

Spend some time in the bedroom with your baby, make positive comments on her<br />

room/crib/bed. That does not mean playing games in the crib: that may be confusing<br />

when she needs to sleep in it. It's rather about making it a place that feels good to<br />

her: fun, safe, relaxing.<br />

14. WHEN TO SKIP A NAP<br />

How do you know when to go from 3 to 2 naps, or from 2 to 1 …<br />

For most children, that happens automatically. You just notice that one nap becomes<br />

shorter and shorter consistently and baby just doesn't seem to need it anymore.<br />

Be careful though: not napping at one given nap several times is not a clear sign that<br />

it has to be skipped. Other reasons are usually more likely (a bad day, teething, …).<br />

Shorter nights are not a fool-proof reason that a nap has to go either – often on the<br />

contrary.<br />

An easy rule of thumb: always insist on keeping the nap. That means keep putting<br />

baby down for it. You can try some fine-tuning to a little earlier or later to see if it<br />

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Nap in a Snap<br />

fits baby better.<br />

If despite your continued efforts, the nap still seems bound to disappear: that is a<br />

good sign that it can go.<br />

Key ages for skipping naps: around 4-6 months many babies go from 3 to 2 naps a day.<br />

Towards 12 months is when most go from 2 to 1 nap.<br />

15. AVOID OVER-TIREDNESS<br />

Being over-tired is what makes it hardest for baby to settle for nap. Observe your<br />

baby closely to learn to recognize her sleepy signs (see Table 2 on page 18) timely.<br />

This way you will avoid putting her down too late.<br />

16. AVOID HALF-NAPS BEFORE THE REAL NAP<br />

If your baby falls asleep shortly before her nap starts – for example during a walk or in<br />

the car – it will be difficult to get her to nap for the full nap after that. She may not<br />

be ready to nap at all anymore.<br />

If you are on the move when a nap is almost coming up: try to keep baby awake. This<br />

can be difficult though – try keeping your eyes open when you are mercilessly dozing<br />

off … If baby does fall asleep in the stroller, car or sling, let her continue the nap<br />

there if at all possible.<br />

And if you can, avoid the situation in the future.<br />

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Nap in a Snap<br />

Chapter 6. Problem solving<br />

I<br />

f you are having a specific nap problem, read on for help on how to improve your<br />

baby's nap situation. I have included the 5 most<br />

More nap problem solving<br />

common nap problems.<br />

A perfect-fit nap routine solves more than half of all<br />

nap issues. You may need a whole new routine, or<br />

simply fine-tune what you have right now. The stepby-step<br />

method of this guide helps you do exactly<br />

that.<br />

1. BABY TAKES ONLY SHORT NAPS<br />

For my detailed advice in specific reallife<br />

situations, see the document “SOS<br />

NAPS”: a compilation of 20 real-life<br />

nap questions and my personalized<br />

answers.<br />

“SOS Naps” is included as a free bonus<br />

to this guide.<br />

Contact e-publish@baby-sleepadvice.com<br />

if you have not received<br />

the bonus yet.<br />

If your baby is only ever taking short naps of 30-45 minutes there are two possibilities.<br />

First, but least likely, your baby may simply be a short napper. If she gets enough<br />

sleep overall, is happy and content all day and it is doable for you to put her down for<br />

the nap often enough, there is no reason to worry or change anything.<br />

More likely is that your baby wakes up after her first sleep cycle. Like ours, baby's<br />

sleep comes in cycles with repeated phases of light and deep sleep. Depending on<br />

baby's age, a typical sleep cycle lasts 45-60 minutes on average, sometimes shorter.<br />

Then the next cycle starts.<br />

In-between two sleep cycles, there is a brief half-awake moment. It is a fragile<br />

moment at which baby easily wakes up. If she is not 100% comfortable (wet diaper,<br />

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Nap in a Snap<br />

too hot, too cold, hungry …) or her body just has not yet learned to sleep through<br />

from one cycle to the other.<br />

So start with the comfort: ensure a clean dry diaper right before the nap, the right<br />

constant temperature in the room, a baby sleeping bag to keep baby at a constant<br />

temperature too, …<br />

If naps remain short, use the Baby Sling Trick (see page 27) and/or this technique to<br />

help her through to the next cycle:<br />

About 5 minutes before she'll usually wake (say 40 minutes after first going down), go<br />

to her. Be very quiet so as not to wake her. Then very gently do something you know<br />

comforts her: stroke her forehead, hold her by the shoulders, place your hand on her<br />

belly, …<br />

The idea is to be so soft en gentle that baby does not wake up. On the contrary, your<br />

reassuring presence and touch can help her stay asleep into the next cycle.<br />

This technique may not work the first time you try it. It takes some experimenting but<br />

once you get the hang of it, it is a very powerful way to help your baby sleep for<br />

longer stretches.<br />

2. TODDLER SUDDENLY REFUSES TO NAP<br />

When your toddler suddenly starts refusing a nap, the first idea is to see if it's time to<br />

skip a nap.<br />

Indeed, if he is still taking 2 or more daily naps then leaving one out is the most likely<br />

solution. Simply leave that nap out, and rearrange the remaining nap(s) for a nicely<br />

balanced day.<br />

But if there was only one remaining nap, and you know he still needs it to get through<br />

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Nap in a Snap<br />

the day comfortably, you should keep it.<br />

Look out for simple causes for the sudden nap problems: more noise on the street or<br />

at the neighbor's Very hot or very cold in the bedroom Has he just transitioned to a<br />

toddler bed Anything stressful happened lately (like a new baby brother or sister,<br />

moving house, …)<br />

Take away any possible cause of discomfort or sleep troubles. If a stressful situation is<br />

at hand, focus on reassuring your toddler by spending some extra quality time and<br />

talking to him about it (these little ones often understand more than we think!).<br />

Re-visit the nap routine. Use the 3 steps in this guide (starting at page 15) to arrange<br />

the best nap routine for your toddler right now.<br />

Furthermore, a sticker reward chart is a very powerful technique to help your toddler<br />

nap better again. You can download free reward charts online along with a how-to for<br />

best results.<br />

3. BABY SETTLES FOR THE NIGHT BUT NOT FOR NAPS<br />

Being able to self soothe is a great skill for baby to have. If she is able to settle alone<br />

at night time bedtime, that is wonderful. It is something to cherish and to keep<br />

encouraging.<br />

It means that baby could self soothe at naps too.<br />

First of all, see if there are any differences between going down for the night or for a<br />

nap.<br />

Maybe at night the room is darker, quieter, colder, a sibling in the room, … Mimic the<br />

night situation as much as possible when baby goes down for a nap. That includes the<br />

bedtime routine you do before putting her down.<br />

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Nap in a Snap<br />

Another possibility is that baby is too tired by the time she goes down for the nap.<br />

Over-tiredness makes it extra difficult to self soothe to sleep. Use Table 2 on page 18<br />

to help you recognize your baby's early sleepy signs. Then make sure she goes down<br />

readily tired, well before getting over-tired.<br />

You may need to go through the 3 step process (starting on page 15) to arrange a<br />

better fitting nap routine: “Three Steps to Nap in a Snap”.<br />

4. DIFFICULT TO FOLLOW TIMED SCHEDULE BECAUSE MORNING WAKE UP<br />

VARIES<br />

As long as nights are not fully consistent yet, baby's day may not start at the same<br />

time every day. This varying start of the day can make it difficult to follow your nap<br />

routine, especially if it is a timed schedule.<br />

To avoid this, it is best to try and squeeze baby into the timed schedule as early as<br />

possible in the day. That may mean keeping her up for a little longer until the first<br />

nap, or shorten the first awake time, feeding sooner after the previous feed, …<br />

These are all OK to do as long as it is not too hard on baby: it's no use to stretch until<br />

the next nap if it only means baby is so over-tired she's all upset and unable to settle<br />

… But gently and flexibly wriggle yourselves into the right schedule.<br />

The regularity of the day will in turn help to have more regular nights so after a while<br />

both night and day schedule will seamlessly fit.<br />

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Nap in a Snap<br />

5. BABY NAPS TOO MUCH<br />

• If your baby is healthy and sleeps well at night, napping a lot during the day is<br />

not an issue. Some babies simply need a lot of sleep.<br />

• If your baby suddenly starts sleeping much more than she used to, that may be<br />

a sign that she is (about to become) ill.<br />

No need to panic, even a simple common cold can cause this. But do keep a<br />

close eye on your baby and consult your doctor if you have any doubt about her<br />

health.<br />

If the sleeping too much continues for a week of more, see your doctor for a<br />

health check in any case.<br />

• Napping too much also happens in a reversed day/night rhythm. Your baby<br />

would then nap a lot but sleep little during the night.<br />

If that is your case you can instill a good day/night rhythm: make sure your<br />

baby feels the difference between night and day. Dress her in clothes, not<br />

pajamas, in the morning. Open the curtains, switch on the lights. Be active,<br />

talk cheerfully, have music on, …<br />

Then when night comes, dim the lights, keep voices and music at lower<br />

volumes, …<br />

These cues are a proven way to help baby adjust to our day and night rhythm.<br />

Also, adjust baby's routine: see if you can stretch the time between too naps<br />

little by little. Go gradually, even a couple of minutes per day, can be a good<br />

start. Combined with the cues you will see good improvement.<br />

page 41


Nap in a Snap<br />

Chapter 7. Appendix: Sleepy Signs Journal<br />

U<br />

se the Sleepy Signs Journal to record your child's sleepy signs during the day. It<br />

is the key to discover the best nap routine.<br />

Once you have kept the journal for several days, consult “Three Steps to Nap in a<br />

Snap“ (page 15) for details on how to use your findings.<br />

How to record your journal<br />

Time: the time or time span of when you observe.<br />

Activity: sleeping, waking up, feeding, out for a walk, playing on the floor with<br />

daddy, …<br />

Behavior & Sleepy Signs: how is your child right now Relaxed, fussy, laughing, very<br />

active, … Use Table 2 on page 18 for help with recognizing Sleepy Signs like staring,<br />

yawning, rubbing eyes, …<br />

Awake/Tired Level: again using Table 2 on page 18, choose what best describes your<br />

child right now: happily awake, almost tired, readily tired, over-tired. These levels<br />

will be your best guide to find the right nap routine. Record asleep during naps or<br />

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Nap in a Snap<br />

night time sleep.<br />

Remarks: anything special today A cold, grandma visiting, vaccination, …<br />

See the following page for example entries.<br />

Getting Started<br />

Print the empty template journal below as often as you need to keep the journal for<br />

several days.<br />

Or download the free app to your Android device and keep your Sleepy Signs Journal<br />

conveniently on your phone or tablet.<br />

page 43


Nap in a Snap<br />

Nap in a Snap – Example Sleepy Signs Journal<br />

DAY Fri, Jun 17, 11<br />

Time Activity Behavior & Sleepy<br />

Signs<br />

Awake/Tired Level<br />

Remarks<br />

6.00am Wakes up, breakfast (nursing) Happy, smiling Happily awake Woke up 3 times to<br />

feed during the night<br />

(11pm, 1am and<br />

3am)<br />

6.30-8am On the floor, playing Seems relaxed at<br />

first but starts<br />

squirming towards<br />

8am<br />

A little fussy around<br />

8am<br />

8.30am<br />

With me on the sofa,<br />

'chatting'<br />

Active but seems<br />

uncomfortable,<br />

maybe hungry<br />

Almost tired<br />

<br />

9.00am Nursing Dozes off at the<br />

breast, wakes up to<br />

nurse, dozes off, …<br />

Fussy<br />

<br />

9.30am On the floor Cries, uncomfortable Over-tired<br />

10.00am In the crib Refuses to sleep, only<br />

sleeps after rocking<br />

for 30 minutes, then<br />

sleeps for 40 minutes<br />

Over-tired<br />

Lisa over for coffee<br />

... ... ... ... ...<br />

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Nap in a Snap<br />

Nap in a Snap – Sleepy Signs Journal<br />

DAY<br />

Time Activity Behavior &<br />

Sleepy Signs<br />

Awake/Tired<br />

Level<br />

Remarks<br />

page 45


Nap in a Snap<br />

Chapter 8. About the author<br />

H<br />

eidi Holvoet, PhD is a professional sleep parenting consultant, author and<br />

founder of Baby-Sleep-Advice.com.<br />

Baby-Sleep-Advice.com is the online resource for everything related to baby and<br />

toddler sleep. Heidi authors articles about best practices to get the most sleep for<br />

both parents and children – all backed up by research and a thorough understanding of<br />

sleep.<br />

Heidi's sleep parenting creed is “There is no magic”. No single sleep solution works<br />

for every baby in every family. A baby and her family are unique and so is the best<br />

method to help her sleep.<br />

Heidi's mission is to guide you towards the best method for your child and family. This<br />

starts with the basic facts and guidelines towards situation-specific advice.<br />

On the site:<br />

• Parents receive personalized advice to their specific situation through the Ask A<br />

Question on the site and private online counseling services.<br />

• Discover how others are dealing with their sleep issues through parent stories<br />

and sleep diaries and let them reassure you by simply showing that you are not<br />

alone.<br />

• Product reviews give the unbiased experienced advice by Heidi and other<br />

page 46


Nap in a Snap<br />

parents about which products help their children sleep better and make our<br />

lives more comfortable.<br />

• The free monthly newsletter, tweets and facebook updates keep visitors tuned<br />

with all the latest on the site:<br />

Subscribe to the newsletter:<br />

http://www.baby-sleep-advice.com/baby-sleep-advice-newsletter.html<br />

Join Baby Sleep Advice on Facebook:<br />

http://www.facebook.com/BabySleepAdvice<br />

Follow Baby Sleep Advice on Twitter:<br />

http://twitter.com/BabySleepAdvice.<br />

page 47


Nap in a Snap<br />

Chapter 9. More books by Heidi Holvoet<br />

Also in the No-Tears series ...<br />

“I doubt we'd be anywhere near sleeping through without this book.”<br />

Used and approved by parents worldwide “No-Tears Sleeping<br />

Through the Night” guides you through Heidi Holvoet's 3-step<br />

program to go from 1, 2 or more unnecessary night awakenings to<br />

none at all.<br />

Starting from the must-do basics for longer nights, you will discover<br />

and understand the many possible wake-up causes. Next you will<br />

apply one or more of the gentle effective techniques to make<br />

sleeping through possible.<br />

Download<br />

“Pleasant to read, easy to do and above all: it really works!”<br />

Self soothing is the single most important sleeping skill to have.<br />

It is the key to sleeping through the night and the basis for healthy<br />

sleep as a child and later as an adult.<br />

“No-Tears Self Soothing” takes you through the necessary steps to<br />

teach your baby or toddler to settle independently.<br />

By doing the 3 steps, you naturally and automatically adapt the<br />

action plan and techniques to fit your baby's maturity and ability as<br />

well as your own family situation for best results.<br />

Download<br />

page 48

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