o_19cr81a2strq1p9logijmbu1ka.pdf

No-Tears Naps
Nap in a snap … 3 simple steps to quality nap times for baby and toddler
by Heidi Holvoet
Baby-Sleep-Advice.com
Contact
e-publish@baby-sleep-advice.com
Copyright notice
Copyright 2011 by Heidi Holvoet – Baby-Sleep-Advice.com
All rights reserved.
Disclaimer
All content in this book is for information purposes only. The author is not a medical professional and does not give medical advice.
Always use your own judgment and contact your doctor or health adviser if you have any concern about your child's health.

Table of Contents
Chapter 1. Introduction.................................................................................... 4
Why naps are so important.............................................................................5
How many naps and for how long....................................................................6
Chapter 2. Three Nap routines............................................................................9
“The clock” - Timed nap schedule..................................................................10
“EPS/ESP” - Pattern nap routine.................................................................... 11
“Baby rules” - Baby-centered nap routine........................................................13
Chapter 3. Three Steps to Nap in a Snap..............................................................15
Step 1 – Discover your baby's nap needs...........................................................16
Step 2 – Choose your baby's nap routine..........................................................20
Step 3 – Install your baby's best nap routine......................................................22
Chapter 4. Settling for naps..............................................................................27
The Baby Sling Trick....................................................................................27
Chapter 5. The Nap Tips List.............................................................................30
Chapter 6. Problem solving.............................................................................. 37
Chapter 7. Appendix: Sleepy Signs Journal...........................................................42
Chapter 8. About the author.............................................................................46
Chapter 9. More books by Heidi Holvoet.............................................................. 48
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Chapter 1. Introduction
N
apping is crucial for your baby's sleep and general health. A good nap routine for
baby also makes your days more pleasant and relaxed.
This guide gives you the necessary step-by-step techniques to find and keep the best
nap routine to fit your baby and yourself.
How to use this step-by-step guide
If you want to know all the ins and outs of successful naps, it's best to read from A to
Z completely. Then come back and browse the info you need in any specific situation.
If you're starting afresh – newborn baby, had no nap routine at all so far or want to
make a new start at any point – get started with the “Three Steps to Nap in a Snap”
on page 15. Continue with sections “Settling for naps” and “The Nap Tips List” right
after that to add proven tips and techniques to your nap plan.
Do you already have the right routine in mind but it's not working yet Go to “Step 3 –
Install your baby's best nap routine” on page 22 and read on from there.
If you have a specific issue with napping go straight to the “Problem solving” section
on page 37. You will then find your way through the other sections as necessary for
your situation.
Short for time If you don't have the time or do not want to go through the process of
finding your baby's nap routine that is alright. The timed schedule is then the best
option. It works well for most babies and toddlers. Go for the timed schedule, starting
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from page 10.
Why naps are so important
Good regular naps help your baby
• be happy and relaxed throughout the day
• sleep the best possible nights
• establish a healthy sleep routine that lasts a lifetime
Content all day …
Depending on her age, your baby needs one or several rest moments to get her
through the day happy and relaxed. If she stays up for too long she will become tired
at first, and over-tired soon after that.
A tired baby, and even more so an over-tired baby is not content. She will be fussy,
cranky and may cry for no apparent reason. On top of that, being over-tired makes it
much more difficult to settle for sleep.
Being well-rested also promotes general health.
… sleeping well at night
Regular naps improve sleep at night.
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A baby who is not over-tired when starting the night will
• settle more easily
• sleep more restfully
• sleep for longer stretches
How many naps and for how long
Nap frequency and duration depend on baby's
• age
• personality and personal physical sleep needs
• feeding and activity schedule
Ideally, baby naps exactly as often and as long as she needs.
The key to that is finding out what she needs and what works just right for her. The
“Three Steps to Nap in a Snap” starting on page 15, help you do exactly that.
How much napping is enough
The single best way to know if your baby is napping enough is to simply observe her.
If your baby, when healthy,
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• is happy, alert and active most of the time
• settles without too much difficulty
• wakes up refreshed after a nap
then you can be quite sure that she is getting enough sleep.
Let's add a few average numbers to complete your picture of typical nap needs.
Average nap frequency and duration
Alongside observing your baby, checking the average nap frequency and duration for
your baby's age can be a helping guideline as well.
To give you an idea of what to expect,
Table 1 gives an overview of average
naps a day and nap duration at
different ages.
But please do not worry if your baby is
off from the numbers in the table. As
with all numbers related to babies,
take them with a grain of salt.
In fact, observing your baby gives a
About the numbers …
The numbers in Table 1 are correct as statistical
averages.
That means we must be aware that average means that
many babies more or less fit that number.
But it also means that many (!) babies still deviate from
the average, and often quite a lot.
Your baby may take two 1-hour naps a day if the
average is three 2-hour naps and that may be perfect
for her.
more reliable indication of how many naps she needs. That is exactly what we will do
further on in this guide.
Just use the averages here as a good-to-know backup.
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Baby's age Naps a day Nap length
0-1 months 3 - 5 1h - 3h
1-3 months 3 - 4 1h - 3h
3-6 months 2 - 3 1h - 3h
6-12 months 1 - 3 1h - 2h
12-18 months 1 - 2 1h - 2h
+18 months 0 - 1 1h - 3h
TABLE 1: AVERAGE NAP FREQUENCY AND DURATION BY AGE
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Chapter 2. Three Nap routines
Should you set up a timed schedule for your baby
Use a pattern routine
Or follow baby's lead completely
How often and how long should she nap
I
t would be easy if there were a single one-fits-all best nap routine for babies, but
there isn't.
With nap routine we mean the type of schedule (time or pattern based) and when and
for how long baby naps.
Is it necessary to have 'a' routine
Absolutely, a good nap routine gives regularity and recognizability: two aspects that
physically help baby's body settle and sleep well.
Even if that routine is flexible.
Baby's ideal nap routine depends on her age, personality, maturity, physical condition
and abilities, sleep habits, ... and also on your own personality and daily activities.
So no prefab nap routine (“must be on schedule”, “must let baby decide when to
nap”, …) is guaranteed to work for your own baby.
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The 3 steps in the next section, “Three Steps to Nap in a Snap” (starts on page 15),
help you find the nap routine that fits your baby best. We then fine-tune it to suit
your baby's needs exactly.
But first, let's have a look at each of the 3 different nap routines: “The Clock”,
“EPS/ESP” and “Baby Rules”.
“The clock” - Timed nap schedule
A timed nap schedule is when you as a parent set fixed naps at specific times during
the day.
For example naps at 10am and 2pm, or 9am, 1pm and 4pm, ...
There is normally room to stretch the times a bit to earlier and later. But when first
setting the schedule, you may need to stick to the times within 5-10 minutes so baby
benefits maximally from the schedule.
You repeat the same schedule every day. Your baby will usually also have a set night
time bedtime.
Pros
• Once the routine set, baby's body becomes physically used to sleeping at the
specific times. Settling is easier and baby sleeps more restfully.
• With baby on a timed schedule, it is easier for you to plan your day for other activities and
family members.
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Cons
• You are 'stuck' with these nap times and your days may be less flexible to plan
in some situations.
• Baby's nap needs change from time to time so you must stay alert to adapt the
times when necessary.
“EPS/ESP” - Pattern nap routine
EPS = EAT PLAY SLEEP
or ESP = EAT SLEEP PLAY
With a pattern nap routine you do not set baby on a clock but go through the day in
several cycles of eating, playing and sleeping.
EPS: When your baby wakes up, in the morning or after a nap, you feed her (EAT).
Then there is PLAY time: your baby is awake and active. Once readily tired, she is
ready to SLEEP.
- or -
ESP: After having been active and awake, it is time to EAT. A short time to digest a bit
an then baby is ready to SLEEP. When she wakes up, there is time to be active and
PLAY.
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Pros
• Once established and consistently respected daily, this routine is easily
recognized by baby. It helps regulate her days and recognize bedtimes as well.
This in turn helps with self soothing.
• Because a pattern is based on baby's natural rhythm, it is usually well adapted
to her needs. And so it automatically adjusts to her changing needs. This is a
great pro for you: no need to worry if you ought to change things around.
• You keep quite some flexibility to arrange your days.
Cons
• Settling can be difficult. Going to sleep at irregular times is not easy for many
babies, especially for those who struggle to self soothe.
• Your days can be quite unpredictable so it may be tricky to plan your own
activities.
• There is a risk of ending up going through this pattern too often in one day. You
will have to be careful to avoid a cycle of short feeds, short naps, short awake
times.
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“Baby rules” - Baby-centered nap routine
You can opt to follow your baby's lead completely. That means you do not impose any
schedule nor do you use a set sleep-eat-play pattern. You simply observe and put your
baby down to sleep whenever you feel is is necessary.
This can work out really well if it fits your personality well and if your baby sleeps
very easily.
It can also be a very good experiment if you have been struggling to fit baby in any
kind of schedule without success.
Observing your baby is key to the success of this method. It's also important to offer
enough opportunity for your baby to nap so she gets the rest she needs.
Pros
• This routine is neatly adapted to your baby's needs. And it automatically
evolves when those needs change, no need for you to step in.
• You have quite some flexibility to arrange your days.
Cons
• The flexibility implies unpredictability as well. That may make it more difficult
to schedule your day with set activities. For example, baby might need a nap
just when you have to take an older sibling swimming.
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• Unless your baby is extremely good at self soothing, the irregular nap times
make it harder to settle.
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Chapter 3. Three Steps to Nap in a Snap
Are you just starting to arrange a regular nap routine for your baby
Tried different things but can't get good naps
Did your baby or toddler suddenly stop napping well
Either way, with the 3 steps below you will find and fine-tune the best routine for
your child.
Here we go ...
Step 1 Discover your baby's nap needs
Step 2 Choose your baby's nap routine
Step 3 Install baby's naps
Take your time …
One remark before we start: although you may be in a hurry to get things fixed for your baby, you will get the
best, long lasting, results if you take the time to do things right.
Give yourselves at least a week to get used to a new routine, allowing more time to let your baby settle to it
completely.
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Step 1 – Discover your baby's nap needs
The first step is to find out what type of routine your baby needs and when and for
how long she needs to nap.
For this we combine two types of information:
• typical nap routines by age
• baby's behavior
Typical nap routines by age
A newborn baby typically follows a natural pattern of sleep-feed-sleep-feed-...
Forcing baby into a timed schedule usually makes little sense now.
The consistency from feeding after waking and going back down after some awake
time and a diaper change gives baby enough regularity to help her sleep well.
Between 1 and 4 months old your baby spends more and more time awake. A simple
pattern routine of ESP (Eat-Sleep-Play) or EPS (Eat-Play-Sleep) often works best now.
Many babies also respond well to a gently introduced timed schedule, if it is flexible
enough to keep fitting baby's changing needs.
From 4 months onwards a timed schedule fits most babies best. The consistent
regularity helps their bodies and minds adjust to settle easily and sleep the longest
possible stretches.
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Observing your child – Use the Sleepy Signs Journal
To get a good detailed idea of what your baby or toddler needs, take a couple of days
to observe her when awake. During these observation days, keep a journal.
Keeping the journal is made easy with the free Android app or the template enclosed
at the end of this guide, see the Appendix Sleepy Signs Journal for details. Record
when she sleeps, how she was right before a nap, any sleepy signs through the day, …
Pay specific attention to sleepy signs. Table 2 has the typical sleepy signs for the
different sleepy states, i.e. how tired is baby when showing this or that sleepy sign …
Use these in the journal.
What if it doesn't work
I explicitly advise you to actually use the log and
record your findings (in writing or on your mobile
device).
It takes a little extra effort but it is amazingly helpful.
I know it would be easier to just remember but only
when written/recorded will you have the overview
and details you need.
What if you rarely see any sleepy
signs in your baby … until she's
cranky with over-tiredness
Don't worry, it's not your fault, some
babies just don't show the signs
clearly.
If that is your case, I advise you to
use a timed nap schedule (see page
10).
Remember that not all babies show the same clear signs timely. Your baby may seem
perfectly OK one moment - then be all cranky and tired the next.
Keep observing her closely, you will learn to spot the early sleepy signs. Writing things
down in the journal helps a lot too.
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Baby is ...
Happily awake
Sleepy Signs
Content, relaxed, playing,
communicating, smiling, ...
Almost tired
Staring, less interested in what's going on around her,
less interested in playing
Readily tired
Over-tired
First yawns, rubbing eyes, lost interest in playing and
surroundings
Fussy, cranky, over-active, can't find a comfortable
position, not happy, crying for no other apparent reason
(hunger, discomfort, scared, ...)
TABLE 2: HOW TO RECOGNIZE AND UNDERSTAND BABY'S SLEEPY SIGNS
Once you have the Sleepy Signs Journal of a few days take a moment to go through it
carefully.
What you mainly want to learn from your journal is:
• How much time baby spends napping
Simply count the total amount of quiet time during the day. That includes
sleeping in the crib/bed, stroller, sling and in your arms.
• Which type of nap routine seems to work best
From your journal, you will find your baby closest to one of these three
situations:
1. On time : your baby seems to be tired at more or less fixed times every
day. You could almost set your clock: for example tired at 10am, noon,
3pm and 7pm.
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2. In a pattern : no fixed times but after being awake for a given time, your
baby is tired. For example, 3 hours after waking she is ready to sleep
again. This may also vary during the day, such as 3 hours awake time in
the morning, 2 hours maximum in the afternoon.
3. Irregular : you do not see any regularity in your baby's daily awake and
sleepy times.
Finally, take a moment to think about your own preference. If all was equal for your
baby, which type of daily routine would you prefer Strictly timed, not timed at all,
predictable or come as it may, …
You will also want to consider older siblings' schedules, work or social duties, …
Then, with the information gathered in this step, it's on to the next one: choosing
your best-fit nap routine.
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Step 2 – Choose your baby's nap routine
This is the step where you decide on your best-fit nap routine. Don't feel stressed
about picking one though. No choice has to be definitive and you can always come
back to readjust if necessary.
As a reminder, the 3 nap routine types are “The Clock”, “EPS/ESP” and “Baby rules”.
With “The Clock” your baby naps at the same set times each day. “EPS/ESP” takes it
regularity from following the same pattern of activities throughout the day. With
“Baby rules” you follow baby's lead completely: she'll nap when she needs to and lets
you know.
See section “Three Nap routines” (starts on page 9) for details, pros and cons for each
routine.
To choose your routine: ask yourself
Does the Sleepy Signs Journal show a clear pattern
YES The Sleepy Signs Journal shows a clear pattern
If you find a nice clear preference for one of the three situations described on the
previous page, then your choice is easy.
Go for “The Clock” if your baby is typically on time. Go for “EPS/ESP” if you do not
see timed regularity, but a recurring pattern.
If your baby seems irregular but settles easily and you easily catch her sleepy signs,
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“Baby Rules” will be your a good choice for you.
You can skip the rest of this section and go straight to “Step 3 – Install your baby's
best nap routine” on page 22.
NO The Sleepy Signs Journal does not show a clear pattern
If the journal does not show a clear preference for any one of the 3 routines, by lack
of clear sleepy signs or if she does not manage to sleep during the day at all:
• If your baby is newborn, say under 4-6 weeks old, a pattern routine with
“EPS/ESP” will be the best choice. But go for “Baby Rules” if that feels better
to you. At this age it will be very close to the pattern routine anyway.
• Under 4 months old, use “EPS/ESP”. If you are personally more inclined to
having a stricter schedule, a gently introduced “The Clock” is good too. Use
“Baby rules” only if your baby settles very easily .
• From 4 months and older, introduce a timed schedule, “The Clock”.
• At any age, if you have been struggling with the routine you have right now:
switch to a different one. Say you've been trying a strictly timed schedule
without success, changing to a more flexible “EPS/ESP” pattern routine can
make a huge difference.
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Step 3 – Install your baby's best nap routine
Here's how to guide your baby into the routine you have chosen above. The next
section will then help you further with settling baby to sleep.
“The Clock” - Timed nap schedule
If your baby shows clear sleepy signs at more or less regular times, setting up the
timed nap schedule is easy. You simply use her sleepy times as nap times.
Most important is to prepare for the nap as soon as baby is “almost tired” so she is in
bed by the time she is “readily tired”. This makes it easiest for her to catch sleep and
sleep the longest.
If your baby does not show clear sleepy signs, the timed schedule can be a great help
for both of you. You will choose the nap times yourself and then fine-tune as you go.
How First pin down the nap times:
• Under 6 months old: 1 mid-morning, 1 early afternoon and 1 mid-to-late
afternoon. If 3 naps seems awfully much for your baby, have just 1 mid-morning
and 1 mid-afternoon nap.
• From 6 to 12 months old: 1 mid-morning and 1 mid-afternoon nap.
• From 12 months onward: 1 mid-afternoon nap.
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Even without the clear sleepy signs, do base the precise times on your baby's behavior
as much as possible.
Write down the times (for example 10am, 1pm and 4pm). It will help you arrange and
keep up with the schedule.
Then as you start putting your baby down for naps at these times, see how it goes. If
your baby has trouble settling, she may simply be too tired. Then shift that nap to
earlier.
If she may on the contrary not be tired at all: playing nicely (but not over-actively)
and content. Then shift that nap to a bit later, 15-20 minutes and see how it goes.
Fine-tune your timed schedule like this until it works. Always give each experiment at
least 4-5 days: baby needs time to adjust and set to it.
How strict should you be If you are just starting out with a (new) timed schedule, it's
best to be quite strict. Nap times within 5-10 minutes of the set time are ideal to help
baby get used to the schedule.
Once the schedule runs well, you will have more flexibility. Most depends on your
baby though: some will need the strictest schedule always, others do well as long as
nap is 'near' the scheduled time.
How does the timed schedule evolve Once the timed schedule is set, you may get the
impression that she seems less tired by nap time. Or not tired at all. In that case, do
not give up on the current schedule too quickly, thinking it needs a change.
Most probably it simply shows that your baby is thriving on the schedule. Even if she
has a few days when she does not sleep so easily or as long as usual.
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Sticking to the schedule is by far the best to keep baby on track, also in times of
illness, teething or other sleep disturbances. As soon as the discomfort is relieved she
will go back to sleeping well again, much helped by the regularity of the schedule.
There can – and will – be a need for change every now and then. If you notice that
your baby naps poorly consistently for 1-2 weeks or wakes up crying and upset after
each nap then you may need to adjust the schedule.
You may need to skip a nap (go from 2 to 1 naps for example), or simply shift one to
earlier or later. You will know by observing your child very closely again. Use the
Sleepy Signs Journal again to help you with that.
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“EPS/ESP” - Pattern nap routine
If you choose a pattern nap routine, baby goes through cycles of Eat-Play-Sleep or
Eat-Sleep-Play all day.
Every sleep moment is a nap. Setting up the routine is easy. Just make a habit of
feeding right after baby wakes, and then let her play before the next nap.
Or you feed right before the nap (typical when nursing to sleep) and then consistently
let her play, or have any other awake activity, before the next meal.
Keep a very close eye on baby's behavior to avoid over-tiredness at all cost (see Table
2). When baby is “almost tired” it is time to prepare for the nap (diaper change,
bedtime routine, ...). “Readily tired” is when she should be down in the crib/bed as
that is easiest for settling.
How does the pattern nap routine evolve The pattern routine automatically adjusts
to your baby's changing needs of feeding and sleeping.
As your baby grows, typically from 4-6 months onwards, her days become more and
more regular. You will then most easily move to a timed schedule (see above). But of
course there is no 'must do' here. As long as your baby naps well on the pattern
routine there is no hurry to change things over.
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“Baby Rules” - Baby-centered routine
The baby-centered routine needs not much setting up. You simply follow your baby's
lead and put her down for a nap when she is “readily tired”. That can be at different
times every day and for a different amount of naps.
One trap you do want to avoid is putting baby down for too many short naps. Five 1-
hour naps can still work out for baby and give her the rest she needs. But if you find
yourself with 6 or more half-hour naps then you may need to guide baby towards
fewer, longer naps.
How does the baby-centered routine evolve As long as both you and your baby are
happy with the routine there is no need to change it around.
If you notice that baby's sleep, also at night, becomes poorer – and it's not because of
an illness or teething – it may be time for a more structured routine like a pattern
routine or a timed schedule (see above, page 9).
The next section gives you techniques to help your baby actually settle for sleep in
her nap routine.
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Chapter 4. Settling for naps
T
he right nap routine is the best guarantee to help your baby settle and sleep
well at naps. The regularity and recognizability truly help baby with this, both
physically and mentally.
But if you are just starting out, your baby may not simply go down and sleep at nap
time.
She may not have learned to self soothe yet or her sleep patterns may not be welladapted
yet.
Once your baby is 6-7 months and older, you will want to work on self soothing with
her. You can start earlier of course. Do not expect much before 4 months though
unless your baby is a natural self soother. At any age, progressive gentle self soothing
techniques are most efficient.
At any time when self soothing is not a success yet, my “Baby Sling Trick” is a
powerful technique to help your baby settle for regular naps.
The Baby Sling Trick
The Baby Sling Trick is named after its original version, using a baby sling. But you can
do it with any carrier that is comfortable and safe for baby to sleep in while being on
the move, like a good stroller or car seat.
You can use it at any age when your baby has a hard time settling for naps. For a
newborn and up to 2-3 months though it does not make much sense as baby's daily
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schedule is still too erratic. But from 4 months and up is good.
The idea is to help your baby settle at the chosen nap moments following your chosen
nap routine. Not forever, but for a week or two, enough to help your baby's body get
used to sleeping at these moments. Once the routine is set, it is much easier to settle
in the crib/bed by herself.
How to ...
How to get started: work with the 3 steps in the sections above to set up your baby's
nap routine. When a nap is coming up, put baby in the sling, stroller, car seat, … and
go out for a walk or a drive.
If you choose to use the sling, you can also stay at home and get some chores done.
You just want to be moving when baby needs to settle, and also at half-awake
moments to help keep her asleep.
These are your 2 aims:
• Help baby settle,
• Get baby through from the first to the second sleep cycle.
In-between sleep cycles, there is a brief half-awake moment. It is a fragile moment at
which a baby who is not used to sleeping through it, easily awakes.
Being on the move around that moment is a top technique to keep baby asleep. Doing
it regularly helps teach baby's body to sleep from one cycle to the next.
You can do this at every nap time but if there are 2 or more a day that may not be
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practical.
Then you can pick one nap, the same one every day, and go for the walk or drive
then.
At the other nap(s), practice putting baby down in the crib/bed. Help her settle
and/or work with the self soothing method mentioned above. The combination of the
Baby Sling Trick with self soothing practice will give the very best results in the end –
given your baby is at least 4 to 6 months old
Do the moving-at-nap-time consistently for at least a week to two weeks. Then start
putting baby in the crib/bed again at that specific nap time. Settling and sleeping for
longer should now have become easier.
You can make the smoothest transition by alternating sling with crib/bed daily at
first, then stick to the crib/bed more and more often.
If you see little improvement, give it a rest for a good week and then try again.
Spoiling baby
Many parents are a bit reluctant to carry their child too much for fear of spoiling. But
if you are careful and do not exaggerate there is little risk.
Remember that experts agree that a baby is not spoilt until at least 8 months old. Yes
she can get used to certain habits but when guided well, she can easily transition out
of them again. There is not “bad” spoiling.
When doing the Baby Sling Trick, just keep in mind to also give your baby plenty of
opportunity to practice sleeping in the crib/bed as well, at other naps or at night.
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Chapter 5. The Nap Tips List
A Baby's naps will only improve.
pply as many of the practical tips in this list as suit your baby and your situation.
1. A BEDTIME ROUTINE
At any age, have a bedtime routine before every sleep moment. If you do not have a
set always-the-same bedtime routine that is fun and relaxing for baby and you, get
started with one now.
Whether for naps or night time, a bedtime routine is a crucial help for your baby to
settle for a good sleep. Baby recognizes the routine and becomes used to
doing/hearing the same things right before sleeping. That physically helps her settle.
A bedtime routine is a set of actions and words you go through each time you put baby
to bed. It typically includes announcing bedtime, changing diapers and clothes,
walking and talking softly towards the bedroom, a lullaby and a kiss goodnight.
Make sure to include something fun and interesting for your baby, without exciting her
too much. This can be her favorite lullaby, a kiss goodnight to a favorite toy, …
Remember to keep it short, 5-10 minutes, with a clear beginning and end.
What if baby does not self soothe yet A bedtime routine is just as important, if not
more important, if your baby does not settle all by herself yet. Maybe you nurse or
rock her to sleep, or use the Baby Sling Trick (see higher).
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Simply go through the bedtime routine right before you start nursing, rocking,
walking, … This way baby automatically comes to link the bedtime routine with
sleeping. And that will be the biggest help for self settling later on.
2. PRACTICE SELF SOOTHING
Self soothing is not only important for baby to settle independently when going down
for a nap. It is also crucial to sleep for a decent, longer nap, because she can then
sleep through brief half-awake moments.
So when your baby is 4 months old, and definitely from 6-7 months, practice self
soothing regularly, even if you usually hold or rock baby to sleep. Follow the
guidelines in part 1 of this book for best results.
3. SAME PLACE, SAME ENVIRONMENT
Napping is easiest for baby if she recognizes her sleep environment. The same room,
same crib/bed, same toys and decoration, …
So it is best to put baby down for naps in the same place every time. This can be the
same as for nights, but it can also be different. Some parents take to the habit of
having baby sleep in the living room for naps, then in the bedroom for nights. That
can work well too.
If you are on the move – traveling or visiting friends or family – mimic baby's home
situation as much as possible. Even simply taking the musical mobile and the favorite
soft animal can be enough.
Of course, wherever you are, do the same bedtime routine as at home too.
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4. LIGHT OR DARK
If your baby is under 3 months and still working to adjust to a regular day/night
rhythm, it's a good idea to have her nap in a room that is not completely dark. This
helps encourage the daily rhythm of sleeping more at night and being more awake
during the day. See The Complete Newborn Sleep Guide for full details on how to
encourage this rhythm.
Once your baby has a good rhythm set, or simply sleeps better in the dark, it is fine to
have her nap in a darkened room similar to at night.
5. BURPING TIME, BURP IN TIME
If you feed baby right before a nap make sure there is enough time to burp if
necessary. A few minutes of sitting up and a diaper change are usually enough.
Even if you nurse baby to sleep, hold for upright and move a little to make sure she
can burp if necessary.
6. A DRY DIAPER
A wet diaper is a very common cause of waking up early from a nap. So it is a good
idea to change the diaper right before, or as close to, the nap as possible. A clean dry
feel makes baby most comfortable and gives the best chances for a longer restful nap.
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7. THE IDEAL NAP ROUTINE
If you have followed the steps in this guide you must have found the best nap routine
for your baby right now. Sticking to it consistently will give the best naps.
Avoid giving up too quickly: a couple of lesser days are usually not due to the nap
routine.
Teething, illness and the likes can all cause the poorer sleep. In fact, it is sticking to
the regular routine that will give baby the best chances to go back to sleeping well
once the disturbance has past.
But still, it is good to allow some flexibility too. Trust your instincts and keep
observing baby's needs: that will help you adjust her nap routine if necessary.
8. GIVE BABY TIME
Give baby, and yourself, time to adjust to a new nap routine or any other change you
make.
As a rule of thumb, give everything you try at least 3-5 days and a week or more for
bigger changes, like a completely new schedule.
Teaching your baby to sleep well is not a quick fix – it is long term results that we are
working on. And these are more than worth some patience.
9. KEEP THE JOURNAL
I know it would be easier to skip the journal but writing down your baby's sleepy signs
in the sleep journal is very important. You will learn more from it than you expect.
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See the section “Step 1 – Discover your baby's nap needs” on page 16, for full details.
10. QUICK-PICK NAP ROUTINE
If you don't have the time or do not want to go through the 3 steps completely: go for
the timed nap routine (see page 10). It is the all-time favorite that works for most
babies and gives the most consistent results. Under 4 months old it may still be a bit
unstable, but later on it's a winner.
Also: if in doubt, go for “The Clock”.
11. MAKE ROOM FOR THE ROUTINE
When first establishing a new routine: arrange your day around it, not vice-versa.
That may mean that you have to skip a weekly playgroup, siblings activities or a
planned shopping trip …
Don't worry, it's only temporary. Consistency is key and may be the only way to make a
new routine work. But once your baby is well used to the routine there is room for
more flexibility.
12. DUMMY SELF-SERVICE
If your baby has a pacifier to sleep, start teaching her to put it back in from a very
young age.
Do this by playing a game: baby has to find the dummy and you cheer enthusiastically
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for her to put it back in all alone. You can also hide the dummy a bit so it also
becomes a hide-and-seek game ... This is all perfect practice for later on when,
during a nap or at night, the dummy falls out.
13. I LOVE MY CRIB!
Make your baby's sleeping environment fun and pleasant. That does not mean it has to
be full of toys. A simple soft decoration with a few (soft) toys and a musical mobile
are perfect.
Spend some time in the bedroom with your baby, make positive comments on her
room/crib/bed. That does not mean playing games in the crib: that may be confusing
when she needs to sleep in it. It's rather about making it a place that feels good to
her: fun, safe, relaxing.
14. WHEN TO SKIP A NAP
How do you know when to go from 3 to 2 naps, or from 2 to 1 …
For most children, that happens automatically. You just notice that one nap becomes
shorter and shorter consistently and baby just doesn't seem to need it anymore.
Be careful though: not napping at one given nap several times is not a clear sign that
it has to be skipped. Other reasons are usually more likely (a bad day, teething, …).
Shorter nights are not a fool-proof reason that a nap has to go either – often on the
contrary.
An easy rule of thumb: always insist on keeping the nap. That means keep putting
baby down for it. You can try some fine-tuning to a little earlier or later to see if it
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fits baby better.
If despite your continued efforts, the nap still seems bound to disappear: that is a
good sign that it can go.
Key ages for skipping naps: around 4-6 months many babies go from 3 to 2 naps a day.
Towards 12 months is when most go from 2 to 1 nap.
15. AVOID OVER-TIREDNESS
Being over-tired is what makes it hardest for baby to settle for nap. Observe your
baby closely to learn to recognize her sleepy signs (see Table 2 on page 18) timely.
This way you will avoid putting her down too late.
16. AVOID HALF-NAPS BEFORE THE REAL NAP
If your baby falls asleep shortly before her nap starts – for example during a walk or in
the car – it will be difficult to get her to nap for the full nap after that. She may not
be ready to nap at all anymore.
If you are on the move when a nap is almost coming up: try to keep baby awake. This
can be difficult though – try keeping your eyes open when you are mercilessly dozing
off … If baby does fall asleep in the stroller, car or sling, let her continue the nap
there if at all possible.
And if you can, avoid the situation in the future.
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Chapter 6. Problem solving
I
f you are having a specific nap problem, read on for help on how to improve your
baby's nap situation. I have included the 5 most
More nap problem solving
common nap problems.
A perfect-fit nap routine solves more than half of all
nap issues. You may need a whole new routine, or
simply fine-tune what you have right now. The stepby-step
method of this guide helps you do exactly
that.
1. BABY TAKES ONLY SHORT NAPS
For my detailed advice in specific reallife
situations, see the document “SOS
NAPS”: a compilation of 20 real-life
nap questions and my personalized
answers.
“SOS Naps” is included as a free bonus
to this guide.
Contact e-publish@baby-sleepadvice.com
if you have not received
the bonus yet.
If your baby is only ever taking short naps of 30-45 minutes there are two possibilities.
First, but least likely, your baby may simply be a short napper. If she gets enough
sleep overall, is happy and content all day and it is doable for you to put her down for
the nap often enough, there is no reason to worry or change anything.
More likely is that your baby wakes up after her first sleep cycle. Like ours, baby's
sleep comes in cycles with repeated phases of light and deep sleep. Depending on
baby's age, a typical sleep cycle lasts 45-60 minutes on average, sometimes shorter.
Then the next cycle starts.
In-between two sleep cycles, there is a brief half-awake moment. It is a fragile
moment at which baby easily wakes up. If she is not 100% comfortable (wet diaper,
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too hot, too cold, hungry …) or her body just has not yet learned to sleep through
from one cycle to the other.
So start with the comfort: ensure a clean dry diaper right before the nap, the right
constant temperature in the room, a baby sleeping bag to keep baby at a constant
temperature too, …
If naps remain short, use the Baby Sling Trick (see page 27) and/or this technique to
help her through to the next cycle:
About 5 minutes before she'll usually wake (say 40 minutes after first going down), go
to her. Be very quiet so as not to wake her. Then very gently do something you know
comforts her: stroke her forehead, hold her by the shoulders, place your hand on her
belly, …
The idea is to be so soft en gentle that baby does not wake up. On the contrary, your
reassuring presence and touch can help her stay asleep into the next cycle.
This technique may not work the first time you try it. It takes some experimenting but
once you get the hang of it, it is a very powerful way to help your baby sleep for
longer stretches.
2. TODDLER SUDDENLY REFUSES TO NAP
When your toddler suddenly starts refusing a nap, the first idea is to see if it's time to
skip a nap.
Indeed, if he is still taking 2 or more daily naps then leaving one out is the most likely
solution. Simply leave that nap out, and rearrange the remaining nap(s) for a nicely
balanced day.
But if there was only one remaining nap, and you know he still needs it to get through
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the day comfortably, you should keep it.
Look out for simple causes for the sudden nap problems: more noise on the street or
at the neighbor's Very hot or very cold in the bedroom Has he just transitioned to a
toddler bed Anything stressful happened lately (like a new baby brother or sister,
moving house, …)
Take away any possible cause of discomfort or sleep troubles. If a stressful situation is
at hand, focus on reassuring your toddler by spending some extra quality time and
talking to him about it (these little ones often understand more than we think!).
Re-visit the nap routine. Use the 3 steps in this guide (starting at page 15) to arrange
the best nap routine for your toddler right now.
Furthermore, a sticker reward chart is a very powerful technique to help your toddler
nap better again. You can download free reward charts online along with a how-to for
best results.
3. BABY SETTLES FOR THE NIGHT BUT NOT FOR NAPS
Being able to self soothe is a great skill for baby to have. If she is able to settle alone
at night time bedtime, that is wonderful. It is something to cherish and to keep
encouraging.
It means that baby could self soothe at naps too.
First of all, see if there are any differences between going down for the night or for a
nap.
Maybe at night the room is darker, quieter, colder, a sibling in the room, … Mimic the
night situation as much as possible when baby goes down for a nap. That includes the
bedtime routine you do before putting her down.
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Another possibility is that baby is too tired by the time she goes down for the nap.
Over-tiredness makes it extra difficult to self soothe to sleep. Use Table 2 on page 18
to help you recognize your baby's early sleepy signs. Then make sure she goes down
readily tired, well before getting over-tired.
You may need to go through the 3 step process (starting on page 15) to arrange a
better fitting nap routine: “Three Steps to Nap in a Snap”.
4. DIFFICULT TO FOLLOW TIMED SCHEDULE BECAUSE MORNING WAKE UP
VARIES
As long as nights are not fully consistent yet, baby's day may not start at the same
time every day. This varying start of the day can make it difficult to follow your nap
routine, especially if it is a timed schedule.
To avoid this, it is best to try and squeeze baby into the timed schedule as early as
possible in the day. That may mean keeping her up for a little longer until the first
nap, or shorten the first awake time, feeding sooner after the previous feed, …
These are all OK to do as long as it is not too hard on baby: it's no use to stretch until
the next nap if it only means baby is so over-tired she's all upset and unable to settle
… But gently and flexibly wriggle yourselves into the right schedule.
The regularity of the day will in turn help to have more regular nights so after a while
both night and day schedule will seamlessly fit.
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5. BABY NAPS TOO MUCH
• If your baby is healthy and sleeps well at night, napping a lot during the day is
not an issue. Some babies simply need a lot of sleep.
• If your baby suddenly starts sleeping much more than she used to, that may be
a sign that she is (about to become) ill.
No need to panic, even a simple common cold can cause this. But do keep a
close eye on your baby and consult your doctor if you have any doubt about her
health.
If the sleeping too much continues for a week of more, see your doctor for a
health check in any case.
• Napping too much also happens in a reversed day/night rhythm. Your baby
would then nap a lot but sleep little during the night.
If that is your case you can instill a good day/night rhythm: make sure your
baby feels the difference between night and day. Dress her in clothes, not
pajamas, in the morning. Open the curtains, switch on the lights. Be active,
talk cheerfully, have music on, …
Then when night comes, dim the lights, keep voices and music at lower
volumes, …
These cues are a proven way to help baby adjust to our day and night rhythm.
Also, adjust baby's routine: see if you can stretch the time between too naps
little by little. Go gradually, even a couple of minutes per day, can be a good
start. Combined with the cues you will see good improvement.
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Chapter 7. Appendix: Sleepy Signs Journal
U
se the Sleepy Signs Journal to record your child's sleepy signs during the day. It
is the key to discover the best nap routine.
Once you have kept the journal for several days, consult “Three Steps to Nap in a
Snap“ (page 15) for details on how to use your findings.
How to record your journal
Time: the time or time span of when you observe.
Activity: sleeping, waking up, feeding, out for a walk, playing on the floor with
daddy, …
Behavior & Sleepy Signs: how is your child right now Relaxed, fussy, laughing, very
active, … Use Table 2 on page 18 for help with recognizing Sleepy Signs like staring,
yawning, rubbing eyes, …
Awake/Tired Level: again using Table 2 on page 18, choose what best describes your
child right now: happily awake, almost tired, readily tired, over-tired. These levels
will be your best guide to find the right nap routine. Record asleep during naps or
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Nap in a Snap
night time sleep.
Remarks: anything special today A cold, grandma visiting, vaccination, …
See the following page for example entries.
Getting Started
Print the empty template journal below as often as you need to keep the journal for
several days.
Or download the free app to your Android device and keep your Sleepy Signs Journal
conveniently on your phone or tablet.
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Nap in a Snap – Example Sleepy Signs Journal
DAY Fri, Jun 17, 11
Time Activity Behavior & Sleepy
Signs
Awake/Tired Level
Remarks
6.00am Wakes up, breakfast (nursing) Happy, smiling Happily awake Woke up 3 times to
feed during the night
(11pm, 1am and
3am)
6.30-8am On the floor, playing Seems relaxed at
first but starts
squirming towards
8am
A little fussy around
8am
8.30am
With me on the sofa,
'chatting'
Active but seems
uncomfortable,
maybe hungry
Almost tired
9.00am Nursing Dozes off at the
breast, wakes up to
nurse, dozes off, …
Fussy
9.30am On the floor Cries, uncomfortable Over-tired
10.00am In the crib Refuses to sleep, only
sleeps after rocking
for 30 minutes, then
sleeps for 40 minutes
Over-tired
Lisa over for coffee
... ... ... ... ...
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Nap in a Snap – Sleepy Signs Journal
DAY
Time Activity Behavior &
Sleepy Signs
Awake/Tired
Level
Remarks
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Chapter 8. About the author
H
eidi Holvoet, PhD is a professional sleep parenting consultant, author and
founder of Baby-Sleep-Advice.com.
Baby-Sleep-Advice.com is the online resource for everything related to baby and
toddler sleep. Heidi authors articles about best practices to get the most sleep for
both parents and children – all backed up by research and a thorough understanding of
sleep.
Heidi's sleep parenting creed is “There is no magic”. No single sleep solution works
for every baby in every family. A baby and her family are unique and so is the best
method to help her sleep.
Heidi's mission is to guide you towards the best method for your child and family. This
starts with the basic facts and guidelines towards situation-specific advice.
On the site:
• Parents receive personalized advice to their specific situation through the Ask A
Question on the site and private online counseling services.
• Discover how others are dealing with their sleep issues through parent stories
and sleep diaries and let them reassure you by simply showing that you are not
alone.
• Product reviews give the unbiased experienced advice by Heidi and other
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Nap in a Snap
parents about which products help their children sleep better and make our
lives more comfortable.
• The free monthly newsletter, tweets and facebook updates keep visitors tuned
with all the latest on the site:
Subscribe to the newsletter:
http://www.baby-sleep-advice.com/baby-sleep-advice-newsletter.html
Join Baby Sleep Advice on Facebook:
http://www.facebook.com/BabySleepAdvice
Follow Baby Sleep Advice on Twitter:
http://twitter.com/BabySleepAdvice.
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Nap in a Snap
Chapter 9. More books by Heidi Holvoet
Also in the No-Tears series ...
“I doubt we'd be anywhere near sleeping through without this book.”
Used and approved by parents worldwide “No-Tears Sleeping
Through the Night” guides you through Heidi Holvoet's 3-step
program to go from 1, 2 or more unnecessary night awakenings to
none at all.
Starting from the must-do basics for longer nights, you will discover
and understand the many possible wake-up causes. Next you will
apply one or more of the gentle effective techniques to make
sleeping through possible.
Download
“Pleasant to read, easy to do and above all: it really works!”
Self soothing is the single most important sleeping skill to have.
It is the key to sleeping through the night and the basis for healthy
sleep as a child and later as an adult.
“No-Tears Self Soothing” takes you through the necessary steps to
teach your baby or toddler to settle independently.
By doing the 3 steps, you naturally and automatically adapt the
action plan and techniques to fit your baby's maturity and ability as
well as your own family situation for best results.
Download
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