Buddhacarita by Ven Asvaghosa - Ancient Buddhist Texts

Buddha-carita, or Life of Buddha - 91
44. He, the chief of the wise, when thus addressed in the midst of the
ascetics by their chief–having resolved in his mind to put an end to all
existence – thus uttered his inward thought:
45. ‘The upright-souled saints, the upholders of religion, become the
very ideal of our own kindred through their delight in showing
hospitality; by all these kind feelings of thine towards me affection is
produced in me and the path which regards the self as supreme is
revealed.
46. ‘I seem to be all at once bathed by these gentle heart-touching
words of thine, and the joy now throbs in me once more which I felt
when I first grasped the idea of dharma.
47. ‘There is sorrow to me when I reflect that I shall have to depart,
leaving you who are thus engaged, you who are such a refuge and
who have shown such excessive kindness to me, – just as there was
when I had to leave my kindred behind.
48. ‘But this devotion of yours is for the sake of heaven, – while my
desire is that there may be no fresh birth; therefore I wish not to
dwell in this wood; the nature of cessation is different from that of
activity.
49. ‘It is not therefore any dislike on my part or the wrong conduct of
another, which makes me go away from this wood; for ye are all like
great sages, standing fast in the religious duties which are in
accordance with former ages.