The of Bonding - La Leche League International

Issue 2
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2010
beginnings
llli.org
The
Chemistry
of Bonding
Making My
Breastfeeding
Journey
Baby Wearing
A Juggling Act
Keeping It Simple

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The
Chemistry
of Bonding
page 04
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Photo courtesy of Kerry Oscar
Table of Contents
Page 08
Mothers’ Stories
[08] A Challenging First Month
[10] Nursing and Nurturing
Two Babies under Three
[12] I’m Breastfeeding My
Premature Twins
[13] Making My
Breastfeeding Journey
Page 14
Staying Home
A Juggling Act
Page 18
Feature article
Baby Wearing
Page 22
Toddler Tips
Temper Tantrums
Page 24
Giving Birth
Kate’s Story
Page 26
Making It Work
That Time of the Day
Page 28
Eating Wisely
Keeping It Simple
Page 29
World Breastfeeding
Week Celebrations
World Breastfeeding Week
Celebration Winners
Page 32
To Honor and
Remember

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Editor’s Note
Issue 2 | 2010 | Volume 32 | Number
2 © 2010,
La Leche League International, Inc.
Managing Editor | Barbara Higham
Contributing Editors | Brenda Carroll,
Heather Davis, Cathy DeRaleau, Johanna Horton,
Gina Kruml, Barbara Mullins, Norma Ritter,
Lesley Robinson, Karen Smith, Sara Walters
Review Board | Barbara Emanuel, Gwen Gotsch,
Carol Kolar, Judy Torgus, Kathleen Whitfield
Art Director | Ronnelito Larracas
Cover Photo | shutterstock.com
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Mother and Baby Attachment
Before I had my first baby I wondered whether I would know how to be a mother, whether I
would in fact feel motherly toward my baby. It seems very odd to recall feeling like that. Now
with three children, when I consider my identity, I certainly feel first and foremost a mother. After
my son was born, my instincts just took over and I spent many blissful hours holding and nursing
him, marveling at this tiny person, and forming the bond between us that will last a lifetime.
In “The Chemistry of Bonding” Linda Folden Palmer examines the science behind our nurturing
instincts and how we naturally form such strong attachments with our babies with the help
of hormonal and neural interactions. Leader Sarah Barnard looks at baby wearing, how to
choose a sling, and why carrying our infants is such a positive way to mother and form strong
attachments.
When the birth of a baby doesn’t go as planned, the trauma can leave a mother feeling resentful
or indifferent toward her baby. In “Giving Birth” mother Kate Rayner shares her painful birth
story. We look at how the physical contact of breastfeeding and the time it requires mother and
baby to spend touching and holding can be comforting after a difficult birth and how it can help
in establishing a loving relationship.
Mothers share tips on coping constructively with tantrums in the “Toddler Tips” column and
in “Staying Home” they share ideas for juggling the differing needs of family members when
dad cannot be around much. In “Making It Work” mothers discuss how they deal with the
practicalities of home life when what they want most of all is to be able to reconnect with their
little ones after a day spent apart.
Please keep sending in your stories, photos and letters because mother-to-mother sharing is what
La Leche League does best.
La Leche League International fully supports the
WHO (World Health Organization)
International Code of Marketing of Breastmilk
Substitutes. LLLI Board of Directors,
(1981,1988,1993,2006)
New Beginnings (ISSN-8756-9981, USPS #010-853) is
published by La Leche League International Inc., PO Box
4079, Schaumburg, IL. 60168-4079 USA.
Telephone 847-519-7730 (9 AM to 5 PM Central Time).
Visit our Web site at www.llli.org.
Barbara
Barbara Higham | editornb@llli.org
Barbara Higham is a La Leche League Leader and LLL magazine editor, who lives
in the spa town of Ilkley, West Yorkshire in the north of England with Simon
and their children, Felix (12), Edgar (8) and Amelia (4).
Canadian subscribers should contact LLL Canada at
PO Box 700, Winchester, ON K0C 2K0, Canada, or
go to www.lalecheleaguecanada.ca with any questions about
subscriptions.

Linda Folden Palmer
The Chemistry
of Bonding
Human babies are born helpless,
needing to be entirely cared
for and protected. Luckily, they
are born with all the necessary
tools and “instructions” to attain
such care for themselves and to
become a loved and loving part
of their family and society. The
neural and hormonal interactions
provided for parent and child
to assist them in this process
are among the most powerful in
nature.* The hormonal cues are
clear and compelling and our
instincts can provide us with all
the appropriate responses. If they
don’t make great efforts to avoid
and ignore such urges, parents
will naturally follow the advice
of their neurons and hormones,
nurturing their babies and
maintaining physical closeness
with them.
Once born, a baby’s hormonal
control systems and brain
synapses begin to permanently
organize according to the human
interactions he or she experiences.
Unneeded brain receptors and
neural pathways are disposed
of, while those appropriate to the
given environment are enhanced.
Oxytocin: a bonding
hormone
Oxytocin is a chemical messenger
released in the brain chiefly in
response to social contact, but its
release is especially pronounced
with skin-to-skin contact. In
addition to providing health
benefits, oxytocin promotes
bonding patterns and creates
desire for further contact with the
individuals inciting its release.
When the process is
uninterrupted, oxytocin is one of
nature’s chief tools for creating
a mother. Roused by the high
levels of estrogen (“female
hormone”) during pregnancy,
the number of oxytocin receptors
in the expectant mother’s brain
multiplies dramatically near the
end of her pregnancy. This makes
the new mother highly responsive
to the presence of oxytocin. These
receptors increase in the part of
her brain that promotes maternal
behaviors. (1)
Oxytocin’s first important surge
is during labor. If a cesarean
birth is necessary, allowing labor
to occur first provides some of
this bonding hormone surge
(and helps ensure a final burst of
antibodies for the baby through
the placenta). Passage through
the birth canal further heightens
oxytocin levels in both mother and
baby. Oxytocin release following
birth is what makes the uterus
contract.
High oxytocin causes a mother to
become familiar with the unique
odor of her newborn infant and,
once attracted to it, to prefer her
own baby’s odor above all others.
Baby is similarly imprinted on
mother, associating feelings of
calmness and pain reduction with
being with mom. When the infant
is born, he is already imprinted
on the odor of his amniotic fluid.
This odor imprint helps him find
mother’s breast, which has a
similar but slightly different odor.
In the days following birth, the
infant can be comforted by the
odor of this fluid. (2) Gradually
over the next days, a baby
continues imprinting upon his
mother. Formula-fed infants are
more attracted (in laboratory tests)
to their mother’s breast odor than
to that of their formula, even two
weeks after birth. (3)
Photo courtesy of Kerry Oscar
By influencing maternal behavior
and stimulating milk “let-down”
(allowing milk to flow) during
nursing, oxytocin helps make these
first attempts at breastfeeding feel
natural. Attempts at nursing during
the initial hour after birth cause
oxytocin to surge to exceptional
levels in both mother and baby.
Mothers who postpone nursing
lose part of the ultimate hormone
high of giving birth. Powerful
initial imprinting for mother and
baby makes it possible for mother
and baby to be able to find and
recognize each other in the hours
and days after birth.
Yet a lifetime of bonding and
love is not lost if this initial
window is missed. Beyond birth,
mother continues to produce
elevated levels of oxytocin as
a consequence of nursing and
holding her infant and the levels
are based on the amount of such
contact. This hormonal condition
provides a sense of calm and
well-being. Oxytocin levels are
higher in mothers who exclusively
breastfeed than in those who use
supplementary bottles. (4) Under
the early influence of oxytocin,
With all of its powers,
oxytocin is but one
of a list of many
chemicals that nature uses
to ensure that baby finds the
love and care he needs.
nerve junctions in certain areas of
mother’s brain actually undergo
reorganization, thereby making
her maternal behaviors “hardwired.”
As long as contact with the infant
continues, oxytocin causes mother
to be more caring, to be more
eager to please others, to become
more sensitive to others’ feelings,
and to recognize nonverbal cues
more readily. Continued nursing
enhances this effect. With high
oxytocin levels, mother’s priorities
become altered and her brain no
longer signals her to groom and
adorn herself in order to obtain
a mate and thus a pregnancy.
4 New Beginnings | Issue 2 | 2010

Linda Folden Palmer
Photo courtesy of Kerry Oscar
Photo courtesy of Kerry Oscar
Now that the child has already
been created, mom’s grooming
habits are directed toward her
baby. High oxytocin in the female
has also been shown to promote
preference for whichever male
is present during its surges—one
good reason for dad to hang
around during and after the
birth. Prolonged high oxytocin
in mother, father, or baby also
promotes lower blood pressure
and reduced heart rate as well
as certain kinds of artery repair,
actually reducing the lifelong risk
of heart disease. (5)
Although a baby makes her own
oxytocin in response to nursing,
a mother also transfers it to the
infant in her milk. This provision
serves to promote continuous
relaxation and closeness for both
mother and baby. A more variable
release of oxytocin is seen in
bottle-fed infants, but is definitely
higher in an infant who is “bottlenursed”
in the parents’ arms rather
than with a propped bottle.
Persistent regular body contact
and other nurturing acts by
parents produce a constant,
elevated level of oxytocin in the
infant, which in turn provides a
valuable reduction in the infant’s
stress-hormone responses. Multiple
studies have demonstrated that,
depending on the practices of
the parents, the resulting high or
low level of oxytocin will control
the permanent organization of
the stress-handling portion of the
baby’s brain—promoting lasting
“securely attached” or “insecure”
characteristics in the adolescent
and adult. Such insecure
characteristics include anti-social
behavior, aggression, difficulty
forming lasting bonds with a
mate, mental illness, and poor
handling of stress.
When an infant does not receive
regular oxytocin-producing
responsive care, the resultant
stress responses cause elevated
levels of the stress hormone
cortisol. Chronic cortisol elevations
in infants and the hormonal
and functional adjustments that
go along with them are shown
in biochemical studies to be
associated with permanent brain
changes that lead to elevated
responses to stress throughout life,
such as higher blood pressure
and heart rate. Mothers can also
benefit from the stress-reducing
effects of oxytocin—women who
breastfeed produce significantly
less stress hormone than those
who bottle-feed. (6)
Nor are fathers left out of the
oxytocin equation. It has been
shown that a live-in father’s
oxytocin levels rise toward the
end of his mate’s pregnancy.
When the father spends significant
amounts of time in contact with
his infant, oxytocin encourages
him to become more involved
in the ongoing care in a selfperpetuating
cycle. Oxytocin
in the father also increases his
interest in physical (not necessarily
sexual) contact with the mother.
Nature now provides a way for
father to become more interested
in being a devoted and satisfied
part of the family picture through
his involvement with the baby.
Vasopressin &
protection
With all of its powers, oxytocin is
but one of a list of many chemicals
that nature uses to ensure that
baby finds the love and care he
needs.
Although present and active
during bonding in the mother
and infant, vasopressin plays a
much bigger role in the father.
This hormone promotes brain
reorganization that supports
paternal behaviors when the male
is cohabitating with the pregnant
mother. The father becomes
more dedicated to his mate and
expresses behaviors of protection.
Released in response to nearness
and touch, vasopressin promotes
bonding between the father
and the mother, helps the father
recognize and bond to his baby,
and makes him want to be part
of the family, rather than alone.
It has gained a reputation as
the “monogamy hormone.” Dr.
Theresa Crenshaw, author of The
Alchemy of Love and Lust, says,
“Testosterone wants to prowl,
vasopressin wants to stay home.”
She also describes vasopressin as
tempering the man’s sexual drive.
Vasopressin reinforces the father’s
2010 | Issue 2 | New Beginnings 5

Linda Folden Palmer
threats, whereas childless males
do not. On the other hand,
nursing mothers do not release
prolactin in response to loud
noise, whereas childless females
do. In children and non-parents,
prolactin surges are related to
stress levels, so it is generally
considered a stress hormone. In
parents, it serves as a parenting
hormone.
Photo courtesy of Kerry Oscar
testosterone-promoted protective
inclination regarding his mate and
child, but tempers his aggression,
making him more reasonable
and less extreme. By promoting
more rational and less capricious
thinking, this hormone induces a
sensible paternal role, providing
stability as well as vigilance.
Prolactin & behavior
Prolactin is released in all healthy
people during sleep, helping to
maintain reproductive organs and
immune function. In the mother,
prolactin is released in response
to suckling, promoting milk
production as well as maternal
behaviors. Prolactin relaxes
mother, and in the early months,
creates a bit of fatigue during
a nursing session so she has no
strong desire to hop up and do
other things.
Prolactin promotes caregiving
behaviors and, over time, directs
brain reorganization to favor
these behaviors. (7) Father’s
prolactin levels begin to elevate
during mother’s pregnancy, but
most of the rise in the male occurs
after many days of cohabitation
with the infant.
As a result of hormonally
orchestrated brain reorganization
during parenthood, prolactin
release patterns are altered. It has
been shown that fathers release
prolactin in response to intruder
6 New Beginnings | Issue 2 | 2010
Opioids & rewards
Opioids (pleasure hormones) are
natural morphine-like chemicals
created in our bodies. They
reduce pain awareness and
create feelings of elation. Social
contacts, particularly touch—
especially between parent and
child—induce opioid release,
creating good feelings that
Babies need milk,
and opioids are
nature’s reward
to them for obtaining
it, especially during the
initial attempts.
will enhance bonding. Odor,
taste, activity, and even place
preferences can develop as the
result of opioid release during
pleasant contacts, and eventually
the sight of a loved one’s face
stimulates surges. Opioid released
in a child’s brain as a conditioned
response to a parent’s warm hugs
and kisses can be effective for
helping reduce the pain from a
tumble or a disappointment.
Parents “learn” to enjoy beneficial
activities such as breastfeeding
and holding, and infants “learn”
to enjoy contact such as being
held, carried, and rocked, all as a
response to opioid release.
Babies need milk, and opioids
Photo courtesy of Kerry Oscar
are nature’s reward to them for
obtaining it, especially during the
initial attempts.
The first few episodes of sucking
organize nerve pathways in the
newborn’s brain, conditioning
her to continue this activity. This is
the reason that breastfed babies
sometimes have trouble if they
are given bottles in the newborn
nursery.
Prolonged elevation of prolactin
in the attached parent stimulates
the opioid system, heightening the
rewards for intimate, loving family
relationships, possibly above all
else. Just as with codeine and
morphine, tolerance to natural
opioids can occur, which reduces
the reward level for various
activities over time. But this is not
a problem for attached infants and
parents, because higher levels of
oxytocin, especially when created
through frequent or prolonged
bodily contact, actually inhibit
opioid tolerance, (8) protecting
the rewards for maintaining close
family relationships. On the other
hand, consuming artificial opioid
drugs replaces the brain’s need
for maintaining family contacts.
Once a strong opioid bonding has
occurred, separation can become
emotionally upsetting and, in the
infant, possibly even physically
uncomfortable when opioid levels
decrease in the brain, much like
the withdrawal symptoms from
cocaine or heroin. When opioid
levels become low, one might
feel like going home to hold the
baby or like crying for a parent’s
warm embrace, depending on
your point of view. Sometimes
alternate behaviors are helpful.
For instance, thumb-sucking
can provide some relief from
partial or total withdrawal from a
human or rubber nipple and can
even provide opioid-produced
reminiscences for a time.
Pheromones & basic
instincts
How does the man’s body know
to initiate hormonal changes when
he is living with a pregnant

Linda Folden Palmer
F
requent proximity
and touch between
baby and parents can
create powerful family
bonding with many longterm
benefits.
female How can an infant
accurately interpret mother’s
“odors” that adults often can
barely detect The answer is
pheromones. Among other
things, pheromones are steroid
hormones that are made in
our skin. Our bodies are
instinctually programmed to
react accordingly when we
detect these pheromones
around us.
Newborns are much more
sensitive to pheromones than
adults. Unable to respond to
verbal or many other cues,
they apparently depend on this
primitive sense that controls much
of the behavior of lower animals.
Part of an infant’s distress over
separation may be caused by the
lost parental cues about the safety
of her environment. Of course the
other basic sensation an infant
responds to well is touch and,
coincidentally, body odors and
pheromones can only be sensed
when people are physically very
near each other.
What the world
needs now
Universally infants cry when
laid down alone. If we allow
ourselves to listen, our neurons
and hormones encourage us in
the appropriate response. Babies
are designed to be fed frequently
in a fashion that requires skinto-skin
contact, holding, and
available facial cues. Beneficial,
Photo courtesy of Kerry Oscar
permanent brain changes result in
both parent and infant from just
such actions. Contented maternal
behaviors grow when cues are
followed. The enhancement of
fatherhood is strongly provided for
as well. A father’s participation
encourages his further involvement
and creates accord between
father and mother. Frequent
proximity and touch between
baby and parents can create
powerful family bonding—with
many long-term benefits.
Sadly, over the last century
parents have been encouraged
by “experts” to ignore their every
instinct to respond to their baby’s
powerful parenting lessons.
Psychologists, neurologists, and
biochemists have now confirmed
what many of us have instinctually
suspected: that many of the
rewards of parenthood have been
missed along the way, and that
generations of children may have
missed out on important lifelong
advantages.
* Hormones are substances
produced in the body’s tissues and
conveyed by the bloodstream to
effect physiological activity, such as
growth or metabolism. The human
brain contains billions of nerve
cells, or neurons. Each neuron is
connected to other neurons through
many thousands of synapses. The
brain’s network of neurons forms our
information processing system.
References
1. Insel, T.R. Oxytocin—a
neuropeptide for affiliation:
evidence from behavioral, receptor
autoradiographic, and comparative
studies. Psychoneuroendocrinology
1992; 17(1), 3–35.
2. Varendi, H. et al. Soothing effect
of amniotic fluid smell in newborn
infants. Early Hum Dev (Estonia)
1998; 51(1), 47–55.
3. Porter, R.H. et al. An assessment
of the salient olfactory environment
of formula-fed infants. Physiol Behav.
1991; 50( 5), 907–11.
4. Uvnäs-Moberg, K., Widström, A.
et al. Oxytocin and prolactin levels
in breast-feeding women. Correlation
with milk yield and duration of
breast-feeding Acta Obstetricia et
Gynecologica Scandinavica 1990;
69, (4), 301–306.
5. Knox, S.S. and Uvnas-Moberg, K.
Social isolation and cardiovascular
disease: an atherosclerotic pathway
Psychoneuroendocrinology 1998;
23(8), 877–90.
6. Altemus, M. et al. Suppression
of hypothalamic-pituitary-adrenal
axis responses to stress in lactating
women. J Clin Endocrinol Metab.
1995; 80(10), 2965–9.
7. Bridges, R.S. The role of
lactogenic hormones in maternal
behavior in female rats. Acta
Paediatr Suppl. 1994; 397, 33–9.
8. Kovacs, G.L. et al. Oxytocin
and addiction: a review.
Psychoneuroendocrinology.
Hungary,1998; 23(8), 945–62.
Dr. Linda Folden Palmer
consults and lectures on the
science behind natural infant
health choices and optimal
child nutrition. After running
a successful chiropractic
practice focused on nutrition
and women’s health for more
than a decade, Linda’s research
into her infant son’s health
challenges led her to write
Baby Matters: What Your
Doctor May Not Tell You
About Caring for Your Baby.
She has recently embellished
and updated her book to be
re-released as The Baby Bond,
The New Science Behind
What’s Really Important
When Caring for Your Baby.
www.TheBabyBond.com
2010 | Issue 2 | New Beginnings 7

Mothers’ Stories
A Challenging
First Month
I was lucky enough—if you can
call it luck—to be informed in
advance of my second son’s
birth that we would be off to a
rough start. We found out at 19
weeks gestation that he would
be born with an omphalocele (a
birth defect in which the infant’s
intestine or other abdominal
organs stick out of the belly
button). The defect was small and
could potentially be repaired in
one surgery. We scheduled a
cesarean section so there would
be little to no damage done to the
organ at birth. I was extremely
nervous to have this surgery as
I had had an easy vaginal birth
with my first son.
When my beautiful son, Bennett,
was born his doctor said that
the defect was much smaller
than anticipated, only a few
loops of his bowel, and it could
be repaired a few days later.
He would not be allowed to eat
before his surgery and he was
strictly on IV fluids. I was fortunate
enough to have nursed my first
son for 20 months, when he
self-weaned. So I was educated
about breastfeeding and was
determined to be successful
nursing Ben. Right after my
baby was born, it was hard not
having that initial bonding that
breastfeeding provides. Each time
I visited him in the NICU the two
days before his surgery, he would
root towards my breast. That gave
me hope that he would be able to
breastfeed without much problem.
I was pumping around the clock,
but my milk had not come in by
the time he was “allowed” to
breastfeed, which was the
evening after his surgery. He
needed to eat to stimulate a
bowel movement, which would
determine if the surgery had
been a success. I gave the
nurses what little milk I was
able to pump, but this was
supplemented with formula,
as much as it broke my heart.
I knew it was important that
Bennett learned to breastfeed,
gain weight, and have an
adequate number of wet and
dirty diapers. I offered the
breast at every feeding while
I was in the NICU (I was there
for eight to ten hours a day),
but he just wasn’t getting the
hang of it. After five days, I was
discharged, but my baby wasn’t.
That was one of the hardest days
of my life.
I was fortunate enough to be
able to stay nearby, since my
own home was over an hour
away. That day, my milk finally
came in. Right before I left the
hospital, Bennett latched on! I
cried. He had a perfect latch and
was nursing as though he had
been doing it the whole time. He
did so well.
He was in the hospital another
three days, taking bottles, but
nursing well when I was with him.
When he was discharged from the
NICU, it was recommended that I
continue supplementing, whether
it was pumped milk or formula—
though he had not had formula
once since my milk had come in. I
had faith that he was gaining well
as he was having plenty of wet
and dirty diapers.
Once we got home I was
Photo courtesy of Heather Stevens & Bennett
Photo courtesy of Heather Stevens & family
determined to nurse him
exclusively. He must have known
that he was home and in good
hands because he took to nursing
every two hours right away and
needed no further supplemental
bottles. We have had a great
nursing relationship ever since. I
feel so blessed to have a healthy,
beautiful baby and to be able to
breastfeed him is a dream come
true. I’m so grateful to my family
and my husband who were by my
side, encouraging me the whole
time.
I am especially grateful to my La
Leche League family, the mothers
whom I call my friends and whom
I met on the LLL mother-to-mother
forums. (Log on and visit http://
forums.llli.org) They talked me
through all of my problems and
anxiety during our NICU stay.
I’ve been a member of the LLL
forums for two and a half years,
and I’m thankful every day for
those women, without them it’s
likely I would not have continued
breastfeeding.
Heather Stevens, Defiance,
Ohio, USA
8 New Beginnings | Issue 2 | 2010

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2010 | Issue 2 | New Beginnings 9

Mothers’ Stories
Nursing and Nurturing
Two Babies under Three
Gabe was a little over a year when we decided to try to conceive our
second baby. He was still nursing all day and all night and not very
interested in eating other foods. I offered him the foods my husband and
I were eating. I was breastfed for several years myself and his lack of
interest in table food was normal to me. I knew he would eventually eat
more foods, but I was very concerned that if I got pregnant and my milk
supply decreased or disappeared,
he would starve. Although I
wanted to wait until Gabe was at
least two to get pregnant again,
with my husband Ryan’s future
military deployments and frequent
moves to plan around, we
decided it would work out better
to have a baby sooner.
I conceived again when Gabe
was 18 months old. I really
wanted Gabe to have as much
milk as he wanted until he was
two. I planned to continue nursing
throughout my pregnancy and
then to tandem nurse. My milk
supply gradually decreased
and Gabe slowly started eating
other foods. My milk supply had
dwindled by the time I was 18
weeks pregnant, but Gabe, 21
months old at the time, was still
very keen on nursing. And he
didn’t starve himself! He didn’t
even appear to notice the drop
in my milk supply. He just nursed
as normal and ate food to make
up for not getting nutrition from
nursing. He was not a picky eater.
He ate what the rest of the family
ate. For this I am very thankful.
I
learned how to do pretty
much everything—
cooking, helping Gabe
use the bathroom, playing
with Gabe, laundry—with
Susanna nursing in the sling.
Photo courtesy of Michelle & Susanna
Nursing during pregnancy was
not painful, although it was
uncomfortable from time to time. I
believed Gabe deserved to nurse
and decided I was not going to
wean. This mindset helped me get
through the uncomfortable times.
Nursing also made it easier to rest
with a busy toddler. He was still
waking often at night to nurse,
which did make me more tired,
but it was manageable. By the
end of my pregnancy, Gabe was
27 months old and not nursing a
lot. He was sleeping through the
night and nursing in the morning
10 New Beginnings | Issue 2 | 2010

Mothers’ Stories
NB_issue1_09.qxd:06Nov_DecNBƒ.qxd 4/16/09 1:23 PM Page 19
and at nap and bedtime.
I knew I was going into labor
when I nursed Gabe to sleep one
evening, which made my still
irregular contractions stronger.
By the time he awoke the next
morning, I was having regular
contractions and had been in
contact with my midwife. My
husband took Gabe to my mom’s
house across the street so that he
would not want to nurse while I
was having contractions.
My daughter, Susanna, was born
at home that afternoon. My mom
and Gabe came over shortly after
the birth and the first thing Gabe
said was, “I want milk.” I was
nursing Susanna at that time, but I
let him latch on and I nursed them
together.
who needs to nurse or to have to
go comfort a toddler in another
room. When the babies wake,
they just nurse right there, not
it would be much
more challenging to
have a weaned two-
disturbing anyone. It can be a
his first joke. I remember the lows—the
problem when Gabe wakes while
nipple pain; feeling overwhelmed by
Oliver’s
Susanna
needs.
is nursing
But the
because
hundreds
he
of
normal has days, to wait. the He thousands accepts waiting of warm,
enjoyable but whines but unmemorable a little bit about feeds, it. fade
into a Sometimes blur. I wake up nursing
Attending one of them LLL with meetings the other and one hearing
about other mothers’ breastfeeding and
whimpering and I’m not sure who
parenting experiences have been
is nursing and who is whimpering!
brilliant. Over the past two and a half
years Gabe I have started gained night so much waking from again the
mothers after I Susanna have met was born, through but by LLL.
They’ve the suggested time she was tips six for weeks specific old, situations,
his changed night waking some was of minimal. my attitudes
completely, and given me true empathy.
Their
I
experiences have helped me to
recognize the truth in the phrase “this
think
too shall pass.” This has really helped me
to enjoy the good bits and cope with the
rocky periods. I would like to say a
During those first few days before particularly warm thank you to my local
my milk came in, my mom and Leaders Ruth, Suzanne, and Barbara for
their listening ears, helpful information,
Ryan tried to spend a lot of time
and, of course, their friendship.
with Gabe. I did not want him year-old and a newborn.
to nurse all the time, although Joanne Whistler
I let him nurse as often as he West Yorkshire Gabe has Great shown Britainonly positive
had prior to Susanna’s birth.
Adapted feelings from a story toward in LLLGB’s Susanna. Breastfeeding I know
Unlike Gabe, who nursed every Matters this is because he does not
couple hours as a newborn, feel like he was replaced, and
Susanna nursed continuously. because his needs have been
I quickly reacquainted myself met. When she cries, her needs
with nursing a baby in a sling! always come first and he seems
I later learned to nurse Gabe to understand this. He is capable
on the other side with Susanna of carrying A on Gift a conversation from
in a sling. I learned how to do and will say, My “Susanna’s Sister fussing,
pretty much everything—cooking, Susanna needs milk.” By seeing
helping Gabe use the bathroom, me tend to her immediately when
playing with Gabe, laundry—with My she younger fusses, sister, Gabe Jaime, is learning has how always
Susanna nursing in the sling.
been
to
one
take
to
care
learn
of
a
a
lot
baby.
by
I
reading.
suspect
So
when she was pregnant, Jaime read and
I cannot think of another way to that he knows anyway but now
learned a lot about breastfeeding. She
manage with a newborn and a joined he a is La seeing Leche it League from the Group outside in her
toddler!
area and instead established of always a wonderful being the one breastfeeding
taken relationship care of. with her daughter,
We sleep in a family bed. We Erin.
have a king-size futon and a twin When We talked I became a lot pregnant about having a month a
after Erin was born, I asked Jaime about
futon on our bedroom floor. Gabe baby before she was born and he
breastfeeding. She told me several
had been sleeping on the twin positives was about accustomed it and to told seeing me babies to look
but moved himself back near me up the and number toddlers of nurse my local at La LLL Leche Group.
after Susanna’s birth, booting my She didn’t League push meetings. information I had a on family me. In
husband to the twin. My husband her quiet member way, staying she just with recommended me full time I
doesn’t mind. I think he’s just glad read about until Susanna it and was decide one for month myself. old. I
attended one LLL meeting late in my
that he gets to sleep all night, We staggered the grandmas’
pregnancy. I didn’t read a whole lot
without waking to go get a baby visits and my husband taking
time off work so that someone
would always be here with me
but the house would never be full
of people. This worked out very
well and I don’t know how I could
have managed without someone
to help me that first month! My
helper primarily played with
Gabe, which he loved.
I think it would be much more
challenging to have a weaned
two-year-old and a newborn.
Like any mom with two so young,
I am always busy but in a positive
way. I spend my time nursing
and playing with my babies,
as well as accomplishing basic
household tasks. With Gabe’s
about needs met, it, just I haven’t the basics, had to and spend thought
that time my preventing baby and him I from would hitting figure it out
if the it baby were or meant managing to be. temper
tantrums. I didn’t I have talk to prioritized my husband my about it
much household or have tasks him and read only anything set out about
it either. I remember him being very
to do the most important ones:
shocked when late in the pregnancy I
announced
grocery shopping,
that I
cooking
would be exclusively
feeding nutritious the meals, baby; and we laundry. would not be
using My husband bottles does if the all dishes went and well. I
remember anything else he that was must not be too done. happy about
time went on. My mom tandem
nursed my sister and me and has
always told me it is very normal
for a toddler to nurse more after
the birth of a sibling.
I do tell Gabe “no” sometimes
when he wants to nurse. He
usually accepts this or waits
without much of a fuss.
If I could have spaced the gap
between my children however
I wanted, not having to worry
about other factors, I would have
waited to get pregnant until
my youngest was at least two.
However, it is no bad thing having
two under-threes—it is just very,
very busy! Sisters I sleep Diane when and they Jamie sleep and their babies
and I am lackadaisical not exhausted. attitude I am toward breastfeeding
spend all during my time my with pregnancy came
happy to
my two from healthy, a lack thriving of knowledge; children. knowledge
(thank goodness) that my sister learned
from a book and passed on to me.
When my daughter was born, I had
Michelle Stille, Milton, FL,
some complications, and it took seven
USA
days for my milk to come in—seven long
days in which my husband and I were
Flower, vigorously H. Adventures reading about breastfeeding.
in Tandem Our LLL Nursing: Leader, Jeanette, was awesome,
it. Looking back now, both of us should Breastfeeding providing During us with much needed support
have read a lot more and given a lot and encouragement. She even came to
Gabe did start eating less and Pregnancy and Beyond. LLLI,
more thought to the subject.
visit me at my house because I was too ill
nursing more after Susanna’s 2003 combines research with
My sister and I were not breastfed. to leave. And, of course, I called my sister.
Our birth, especially mom says after it the just first was not personal At stories. that point I was determined to breastfeed.
Seeing what a positive experience it
something month when you I was did alone then. with So, we had http://store.llli.org/public/
never the children really at been home around all day. any He breastfeeding
gradually mothers. started eating We were more never as taught eager to nurse my own child. I am so
product/3 was for my sister made me all the more
about it in school, and no one ever glad that I did.
talked to us about it. I believe that my My 11-month-old daughter, Madison,
Baby sleeps snugly and safely
alongside adult bed
Converts to free-standing bassinet or changing table
For information on the benefits of co-sleeping
please go to www.armsreach.com
(800) 954-9353 or (805) 278-2559
ARM’S REACH CONCEPTS, I NC
© 2004 Arm's Reach Concepts,Inc. ARM'S REACH, CO-SLEEPER,
Mother & Child Logo and all other trademarks are stringently protected.All rights reserved.
Patents pending.
“I am pleased to recommend Arm’s Reach
as a wonderful nighttime attachment tool.”
Dr. Wm. P. Sears,
Author “The Baby Book: Nighttime Parenting”
The Mini
Just 20"x34"
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Newborn
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Award-winning
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Parenting
Issue 1, 2009 • NEW BEGINNINGS 19
2010 | Issue 2 | New Beginnings 11

Mothers’ Stories
became severe. I was there for three days before
I delivered via cesarean section. I was not able to
visit my babies for a whole day and was extremely
fatigued due to all the medicines and the sickness at
the end of my pregnancy.
I started pumping my milk. At first it was only about
four times a day, then I was able to build up to six
times a day. The boys weighed 3lb 7oz and 3lb
10oz. They were started on naso-gastric feedings at
a few days old and on bottles about a week later.
They tore through my limited supply of breastmilk
very quickly and received formula milk several times
to supplement it. It was frustrating because I never
seemed to be able to get hold of a doctor and the
nurses said they were afraid that nursing would tire
my babies out too quickly. I only did kangaroo care
twice for each boy the whole month they were there.
Finally my babies came home after 26 and 28 days
in the NICU. By this time they were used to bottles.
Ian attempted nursing the night before coming
home and Eli didn’t attempt it until he was home. I
struggled to pump in between trying to get them to
nurse and feeding them bottles. It was almost too
much to bear.
Photo courtesy of Cinda Vickery
I’m Breastfeeding
My Premature
Twins
I struggled to breastfeed my premature twin boys. Feeding two can
be tricky and prematurity adds to the challenge. I wasn’t able to start
breastfeeding until they came home at one month old.
Then Eli discovered that he loved nursing and was
able to latch on to the breast really well. I was able
to nurse him almost every feeding while giving Ian
bottles. And then it clicked for Ian as well. Soon every feeding was done
mostly by breast.
Now my boys are five months old. Ian is now over 10lb and Eli is almost
10lb. They are exclusively breastfed. We will be starting solids in a
month or two.
I hope this story encourages mothers out there who feel they can’t cope
with trying to breastfeed when they experience problems. It felt that way
for me too. I kept with it and succeeded and you can too.
Cinda Vickery, Madisonville, KY, USA
At 31 weeks gestation I was admitted to hospital due to high blood
pressure. I was showing signs of premature labor and sent to a hospital
an hour away from my home that had a better equipped NICU than
my local hospital. I was diagnosed with pre-eclampsia, which quickly
12 New Beginnings | Issue 2 | 2010

Mothers’ Stories
Making My
Breastfeeding
Journey
My breastfeeding journey
has been a rocky one, full of
disappointment and heartache,
but oh what a happy ending!
I’ve been a baby nurse for
12 years now and I can’t tell
you how many women I’ve
encouraged and helped to
breastfeed! In my career breast
has always been best. Imagine
my shock and disappointment
when I had breastfeeding
complications with my first child.
From the first moment she nursed,
my nipples were cracked and
bleeding. I worked diligently
with the lactation consultants to
try to improve her latch. I tried
various creams, gel pads, and
nipple shields for the first week or
two but then I was struck with a
terrible bout of mastitis. Knowing
that this is extremely common, I
forged ahead after seeking advice
from my midwife and lactation
consultant. I was treated with
antibiotics, rest, and fluids. But,
the mastitis never improved … in
fact, it got worse.
The fever didn’t stop and the pain
was considerable, as the infection
spread to both sides. I was started
on a different antibiotic and
began pumping when nursing was
too painful. By about five weeks, I
was on my third antibiotic and still
very sick. I was terribly engorged
and the fevers continued to rage,
but I persisted, determined to
get through this. At my fourth
trip to the doctor, he told me that
enough was enough and I
Photo courtesy of Wendy McDowell
needed to stop. After ruling out
a candidal infection, he said
that this was the worst case of
recurrent mastitis that he had seen.
I was sent for milk cultures and an
ultrasound because he suspected
an abscess. He even prescribed
Parlodel to me, an old drug used
in the past to stop lactation.
I was so disappointed! How could
this be I’m a nurse for goodness
sake … I had to breastfeed! But,
I unhappily took the drug and
stopped nursing. I bound my
breasts (not advisable) and used
cabbage leaves to dry up my milk.
I was put on a different antibiotic
to treat the resistant strain of
bacteria I had developed. Slowly I
improved and after several weeks
was feeling better … physically.
But utterly devastated emotionally.
My next child was born four
years later. I was ready this time.
I was going to breastfeed her,
no matter what! My family was
supportive, but very concerned for
my health. Prior to the birth, we
decided (I very reluctantly) that at
the first sign of mastitis, I would
stop nursing. My milk came in on
the third day postpartum and by
the fifth day I was sick. The
fevers, chills, and headache
started along with the telltale
red streak. My daughter tried
to nurse, but couldn’t get any
milk. I tried to pump and was
unsuccessful, despite the fact
that I was hugely engorged.
I used cabbage leaves to
relieve the engorgement and
started antibiotics. As agreed,
I stopped nursing on day six.
How could this be Weren’t
women made to breastfeed
Why wasn’t this working for
me I felt like a disappointment
as a mother and a woman.
Why couldn’t I give my baby
what was best for her
Four years later, when we
decided to have another child, I
met with the lactation consultant
immediately. Was there something
I was missing Could the first
mastitis have caused scar tissue
that was blocking the outlet of
milk I met with a breast surgeon
who did an ultrasound. She did
indeed see some scar tissue, but
said it was worth another shot. So,
my midwife, lactation consultant,
and I began researching severe
recurrent mastitis. We developed
a plan for prevention, hoping that
maybe it would buy me at least a
month or two of breastfeeding.
When my daughter was born, I
started taking a very low dose of
prophylactic antibiotics. The plan
was to continue this for about two
months. Upon discharge I was told
that three things were not optional
right now, sleep, nutrition, and
plenty of fluids. Those were the
things I had control over—the
rest was left to faith. In addition, I
met with the lactation consultants
frequently to assess my baby’s
latch-on and prevent nipple
breakdown. I began taking
the supplement lecithin daily to
prevent clogged ducts.
The first four weeks were
rough. I was so paranoid about
getting sick that at the first
sign of night sweats, chills, or
engorgement I would call the LC
for encouragement. I should have
put her number on my speed dial I
called her so often! I analyzed my
breasts every time I fed my baby,
looking for any sign of redness,
but it never came!
Imagine my shock and excitement
when one month came, then two,
then three! Each time I nursed
my daughter I thanked God for
this wonderful opportunity. I can
honestly say that there was not a
feeding that went by (even those 3
am ones) that I didn’t look into her
sweet little face and think I was
the luckiest mommy in the world to
be blessed by so much.
If you are struggling with
breastfeeding, keep trying! There
will be ups and downs; that’s
why we talk about a “journey.”
It’s true that each baby and
each breastfeeding experience
is different. For me, the third
time was the charm! That, along
with the support of my family,
a wonderful group of lactation
consultants, and a lot of prayer!
Now my daughter is a year old
and my breastfeeding journey
continues. And what a blessing it
has been!
Wendy McDowell, East
Berlin, Pennsylvania, USA
2010 | Issue 2 | New Beginnings 13

Staying Home
A Juggling Act
Mother’s Situation
Recently, my husband has been expected
to work longer hours, which helps financially
but means he is unable to do anything much
to help in the home. We are expecting our
second child and I am worried that I will
struggle without his help to take care of a
toddler and a newborn, as well as do all the
household chores and cooking. I am happy
that I am able to stay home to raise our
children, but I am panicking at the prospect
of having to manage everything on my own.
How have other mothers coped in similar
situations
Response
Take care of the children’s needs first. If some dishes need to be left in
the sink, who cares Regular household chores will get done when there
is time. If funds allow, hire a cleaning service.
Prepare your toddler as much as possible for the new baby’s arrival.
Read books to him on the subject and talk about it. When the new baby
arrives, wear him in a sling or a carrier as much as possible so you can
keep your hands free to accomplish those household chores. Wearing
the baby also allows you to spend time with your older child.
Make sure your husband is aware of your concerns. Including him in the
planning and problem solving will keep you from feeling as if you are
alone in the matter. You might find that he has been worrying about it as
well, and has come up with some potential solutions or suggestions.
Most of all, remember to give yourself a break. Adjusting to a newborn
takes time, even if you have a lot of help in the house. Allow yourself
the chance to fall into a routine with the new baby and the toddler. The
house and all of its chores will still be there when you are ready for it.
Good luck!
Karli Offutt, New Wilmington, PA, USA
Photo: © shutterstock.com
Response
When I had my second baby, I was a stay-at-home mom and my
husband was working full time, and also taking two courses at a
college 30 minutes away. We had his mother stay at our house for
the first week and my mother the second week. After that a couple of
friends came over to help me with the housework once or twice. They
helpfully suggested that we eat on paper plates, use paper cups, and
even sometimes use disposable plastic utensils. We did that for several
months, which was wonderful!
During that time, two responsible teenage sisters, whom we knew
and trusted, would come to our apartment after high school a couple
of afternoons a week to play with our babies while I took a shower,
took the kitchen trash to the dumpster behind our building, and started
cooking supper. Their mom would pick them up on her way home from
work. One or the other of them continued to come at least once a week
for a few months. They were glad to do it free of charge because they
were in an achievement program that required them to get service hours
in order to receive awards.
14 New Beginnings | Issue 2 | 2010

Staying Home
Although I eventually had to
face having two children and
managing my home all by
myself, that transition time while
I recovered from pregnancy and
birth was a lifesaver for me!
Annette Avery, Johnstown,
Colorado, USA
Response
I too am a full-time stay-at-home
mom and have been facing
a similar situation. I have a
14-month-old son and I am 15
weeks pregnant. My husband has
been gone for nearly six months:
he is in the Army National Guard
and is training in Baltimore, while
we live in St Louis. We have been
to visit him twice.
I suggest you start by getting
organized and having a fairly set
schedule. We eat basic meals that
can be planned on a set schedule.
It might get a little boring, but if
you always know what you are
going to eat and know what you
need to have on hand it helps. I
make three weeks of menus and
have them rotate. The grocery list
I use is also set and perhaps, like
me, you can cut grocery shopping
to a once a week activity.
I do a small load of laundry every
single day and have a small
basket for my son and one for
me. Each day I wash one basket
load and have my son help with
the folding by playing with his
basket—he pushes it around, or
puts his stuffed animals in it.
I attend a mom and baby exercise
class three times a week and find
that time to be very important
to me. The friendships with the
other moms and the stress relief
of getting exercise and getting
out of the house on a regular
set schedule is so important.
There are great double strollers
available and you don’t have to
spend a fortune on one. I find
great baby stuff on Craigslist and
Freecycle.
For me the biggest thing that I
have learned is how to put things
into perspective. While I too
worry about when the new baby
comes and about dealing with
a toddler, a newborn, and an
entire household, I know what is
important and what can wait.
I don’t want to sound like I am
complaining but I would be so
happy to have my husband be
home even for just an hour a
day. I have learned through this
experience to count my blessings
first.
Good luck.
Jamie Smith-Rickly, USA
Response
I can empathize with your
situation and can tell you honestly
that it will be difficult in the
beginning, but this too shall
pass. I know that isn’t consoling
as you face this mountain, but
in the bigger picture I would say
celebrate the small victories, and
stay focused on the small steps
you are making.
I had two small children one year
apart and when our second child
was born, my husband had a new
job and could not take any time
off. He also attended graduate
school three times a week, which
meant I was home alone with the
children. With the birth of our
third child (three years after our
second), we had moved and he
started another new job. He works
long hours and the household
tasks are left up to me to handle.
When you have a newborn,
everyone in the house has to
adjust to the new baby. You
will likely feel pulled in every
direction. Give yourself time to
adjust, even as much as three
to six months to settle in to a
routine. Only then can you start
to prioritize a routine for yourself
and your children. I strongly
recommend soliciting the help
of family and friends whenever
possible, especially in the early
months.
I had an emergency c-section with
our second child and I wasn’t
permitted to pick up my one-yearold.
I needed friends and family
to help me with the most mundane
tasks. Overall, I think friends
enjoyed being able to spend time
with my little ones and me. In
return, I was humbled and in awe
of their loving support.
It can be very easy to become
isolated, so it is important to get
out as often as you can. Getting
involved in local mothers groups
can be a big help.
Try to become more relaxed with
regards to household chores
and cooking. Having two small
children forces you to be flexible
with your priorities. Toys out,
dishes in the sink, and laundry in
the hamper waiting to be folded
was (and still is) a daily sight at
my house. I tackle what I can
when I can.
Be patient with yourself and allow
yourself some time to adjust. Know
that you aren’t alone and you are
doing the best you can and that is
all anyone can ask of you!
Bianca Hennager, Roseville,
California, USA
Response
Congratulations on the upcoming
birth of your new baby! I can
relate to your concerns about
handling the needs of two children
on your own while your husband
is working long hours. I have four
children and my husband works
a military night-check (3 pm to
1 am Sunday to Thursday). He
is home and awake from about
10:30 am to 2:30 pm. Our two
oldest children are in elementary
school, one is in preschool and I
have a six-month-old. Most days
I have the baby with me, a fouryear-old
boy whom I watch, and
my own three-year-old after 11:30
am. My two older kids get home
around 2:45 (not long after daddy
has just left for work). During the
busiest times of the day, getting
everyone out the door to get
to school in the morning and
homework, supper and bedtime
routines in the evening, I am on
my own. I am a morning person
so getting five people out the door
isn’t too bad for the most part.
The after school routine is where
I struggle. I am not an evening
person! I have found that the
biggest hurdle in my evening
is getting food on the table.
Housework is sometimes a
hurdle if I get behind. However,
because my husband is at home
and awake in the middle of the
day, I do have help either with
the children or with the work
itself. I do all my cooking on the
weekend when my husband is
home all day. Since he tries to
spend quality time with the kids
on the weekend, I can get a lot
2010 | Issue 2 | New Beginnings 15

Staying Home
done. I prepare all our hot meals
on Saturday (or sometimes Friday
although that is usually errand
day). I also do things like bake
muffins and bread, and make and
freeze pizza dough. During the
week, we reheat the food and
I use frozen vegetables, which
I thaw/heat in the microwave
because it’s faster. I admit that at
least once a week we have cheese
pizza. I keep tinned tomatoes in
the pantry, the dough will thaw in
about six hours and I just have to
grate some cheese (which I can
do before my husband goes to
work).
Figure out easy recipes that are
nutritious and make two or three
batches if you’ve got a deep
freeze. I often assemble things like
lasagne and freeze it uncooked.
Then I can thaw it out during the
day or overnight and bake it for
supper. A freshly baked meal that
only requires me to transfer a dish
from the freezer to the fridge and
the fridge to the oven is great.
I tackle the housework a room or
two at a time over the course of
a week rather than trying to do
it all at once. I use a modified
“FlyLady” routine by dividing my
home into zones for each day,
except Sunday. I can get one or
two rooms cleaned properly in a
day. It’s amazing what you can
accomplish in 10 or 15 minutes
if you break up the tasks over the
course of the day.
With a new baby I found out
something very important: friends
want to help! If someone offers
help take it. People do not offer
help that they are not prepared
to provide. If your LLL Group or
friends offer you meals accept
them! If someone asks if you need
anything at the store, ask him to
pick up that gallon of milk you
were going to try to get out for
later. If someone offers to come
and play with your toddler while
you take a nap with the new
baby, say “yes!” Allow those who
have anticipated or seen your
need to meet it.
You may have to let the housework
slip a little because of the needs
of the children—either to spend
time with your toddler while your
baby is sleeping, or because if
you’re tandem nursing, you may
be spending a lot time sitting in
your nursing chair. Use the time
your husband is home to do a
little catching up and remember
that while he’s been at work, he’s
missed time with you so don’t
spend all the precious time you
have with your husband at home
cleaning and cooking.
I had some tough days in the first
ten weeks with my fourth baby.
She was a fussy baby—I think she
had reflux—and I spent a lot of
time from 4 pm onwards having to
walk with her in the sling, crying
most of the time. It made getting
food on the table a real challenge
even when it was just warming
something up in the microwave.
But things settled down and now
we’re in a nice smooth routine.
I found that each time a new
baby arrived, it was challenging
at first and then within a couple
of months, we had adjusted to
our new routine with the extra
person’s needs worked into
our routine. It can be so hard
sometimes when you’re exhausted
and the baby still needs you and
you’ve got no one to hand the
baby off to so you can just go to
the bathroom. However, it’s also
rewarding. I hope your husband
won’t be working overtime forever
and you’ll have him home more in
the future to be a helping hand.
Good luck with everything! It
might take a bit of trial and error,
but I’m confident you’ll find a
way to make things work for your
household just as I did for mine.
Margo Trueman, California,
USA
Mother’s New
Situation
My youngest
child just started allday
kindergarten. I am
in unfamiliar territory
because I have always
been running with
my three children’s
schedules. Now I have
time on my hands and
I do not know what to
do with it. Many of my
friends are assuming
I will just get a job to
fill my days, but I am
not sure I want to, or
will be able to with the
job market the way it is
today. How have other
mothers adjusted to
this first “empty nest”
syndrome
“Staying Home” is edited by
Cathy DeRaleau, who lives in
New Castle, PA, USA with her
husband and four children.
Please send responses and new
situations to staying.home@llli.org
16 New Beginnings | Issue 2 | 2010

2010 | Issue 2 | New Beginnings 17

Feature article
Baby Wearing
There are
emotional,
physical,
and
practical
reasons
why
wearing a
baby in a
sling is a
good idea.
Human babies are born
significantly less mature than
babies of other species that, like
us, give birth to single infants
or small multiples. The human
infant is born “prematurely” to
allow its head to pass through
the birth canal before it gets
too big and it completes the
gestational period outside
the womb. The human brain
quadruples in size after birth.
Photo: © shutterstock.com
How mammals
care for their
young
Depending on how they care for
their young, mammals can be
divided into four different groups.
There is an interplay between
the baby’s immaturity and the
differences in mother’s milk.
• Cache mammals. These
include the deer and rabbit. Their
mothers hide their young in a
safe place and return to them
every 12 hours. Consistent with
this behavior, the milk of cache
animals is high in protein and fat.
It sustains the young animals for a
long time because babies are fed
infrequently.
• Follow mammals. The giraffe and
cow are follow mammals. They
follow their mothers wherever they
go. Since the baby can be near
the mother throughout the day and
feed often, the milk of the follow
mammal is lower in protein and fat
than that of a cache mammal.
• Nest mammals. These include
the dog and cat. Nest mammals
are less mature at birth than cache
or follow mammals. They need the
nest for warmth and remain with
the other young from the litter. The
mother returns to feed her young
several times a day. The milk of
nest mammals has less protein and
fat than cache mammals but more
than that of follow mammals, which
need to feed more frequently.
• Carry mammals. This group
includes the apes—including
humans—and marsupials, such as
the kangaroo. The carry mammals
are the most immature at birth,
need the warmth of the mother’s
body, and are carried constantly.
Their milk has low levels of fat and
protein, and they are fed often,
around the clock. Human milk has
the lowest fat and protein content
of all mammalian milks. That and
our immaturity at birth mean human
infants need to feed often and are
meant to be carried and held.
18 New Beginnings | Issue 2 | 2010

Feature article
Photo: © shutterstock.com
Human babies are as vulnerable
and dependent outside the womb
as they are inside. Our babies
need the same 24-hour nurturing
and care that they had in utero.
In the mother’s womb, the baby
never feels hunger, is never
lonely or cold, experiences all
sounds and sensations through
the mother’s body, which cushions
and softens them. After the
journey of birth, it seems natural
that a baby would expect that
same quality of 24-hour nurturing.
Babies cannot get up and follow
us on their own until about a year
or so after birth. They cannot, like
ape and monkey babies, cling to
their mothers, although the strong
grip reflex with which babies are
born is thought to be a remnant of
a time in our evolutionary journey
when they could.
So we find ways to keep our
babies close, using our large
brains rather than our body hair.
Primate mothers tend to take their
infants with them as they go—the
infants following or clinging to
their mother.
Keep them close
Recent research confirms that
being close to an adult caregiver
guarantees more than safety and
convenience.
Crying
Babies in skin-to-skin contact have
more stable heart and breathing
rates, better blood sugar levels,
significantly lower levels of
circulating stress hormones, and
warmer body temperatures.
Studies show that carried babies
cry less. (1) The crying pattern of
normal infants in industrialized
societies is characterized by an
overall increase until six weeks
of age followed by a decline
until four months of age with a
preponderance of evening crying.
Hunziker and Barr hypothesized
that this “normal” crying could
be reduced by supplemental
carrying, that is, increased
carrying throughout the day in
addition to that which occurs
during feeding and in response
to crying. In a randomized
controlled trial, 99 mother-infant
pairs were assigned to an
increased carrying or control
group. At the time of peak crying
(six weeks of age), infants who
received supplemental carrying
cried and fussed 43% less overall,
and 51% less during the evening
hours (4 pm to midnight). Similar
but smaller decreases occurred
at 4, 8, and 12 weeks of age.
Decreased crying and fussing
were associated with increased
contentment and feeding
frequency but no change in
feeding duration or sleep. They
concluded that supplemental
carrying modifies “normal” crying
by reducing the duration and
altering the typical pattern of
crying and fussing in the first three
months of life. The relative lack
of carrying in our society may
predispose to crying and colic in
normal infants (Hunziker and Barr
1986).
Where baby wearing is the
norm, babies demonstrate a
strong attachment to parents and
caregivers, and show greater
social awareness. Happy babies
make happy mothers, too.
Passive involvement
One of parents’ tasks is to show
their child what it means to be a
member of a family, community,
and country. It is not too difficult
to achieve when your baby is
not kept at a distance. He can
be passively involved in all you
do while you hold him securely
against your warm comforting
body—he knows and trusts
you. Jean Liedloff, author of The
Continuum Concept, wrote, “The
baby passively participates in
the bearer’s running, walking,
laughing, talking, working, and
playing. The particular activities,
the pace, the inflections of the
language, the variety of sights,
night and day, the range of
temperatures, wetness and
dryness, and the sounds of
community life form a basis for the
active participation that will begin
at six or eight months of age with
creeping, crawling, and then
walking.” (2) You provide your
baby with the security he needs
to be able to look outwards and
explore the world.
Flat head syndrome
In recent years there has been an
increase in the number of babies
with plagiocephaly or flat head
syndrome, a malformation of
the head marked by an oblique
slant to the main axis of the skull
or a persistent flattened spot on
the back or side of the head.
Wendy S. Biggs (3) describes
how the length of time babies
in Western society spend supine
has increased the likelihood of
suffering from this malformation.
She directly attributes this to
the infant spending “more time
reclining with his or her head on a
hard surface such as in a car seat
or swing.” Babies who spend less
time in seats and more time being
carried in a sling are less at risk
of developing this deformation. It
seems logical that if your baby is
often upright against your body,
his head supported not by rigid
plastic but by soft fabric or by
your arms, he is less likely to suffer
from flat head syndrome.
2010 | Issue 2 | New Beginnings 19

Feature article
Photo: © shutterstock.com
Carrying is practical
When you have a new baby,
while your hormones do all
sorts of wonderful things such as
helping you to make milk and
promoting feelings of love and
attachment to your baby, they
do not, unfortunately, grow you
a spare pair of hands! A sling,
however, can act as an extra pair
of hands—gentle, warm, snugly
hands that hold your baby close
to you while you are able to do
other things.
Chief among the things I wish I
had known when my daughter
was born is that a sling should be
on everyone’s Essential Newborn
Accessories list, rather than being
considered just as a nice optional
extra. Even if you only have
practical concerns there are a
multitude of reasons to use one. I
somehow managed without one,
partly through extreme laziness—
“I can’t do that at the moment,
the baby needs cuddling!”—and
having a lot of support with things
that required more than one hand.
For months I held my baby in my
arms, instinctively knowing that
in my arms was the best place
for her to be, but it did make it
challenging to get things done!
Those evenings in the early weeks
when your baby cluster feeds for
hours are not so stressful if you are
not obliged to stay in the same
place. If you wear your baby in
a sling you can keep her at the
breast and still get up, eat dinner,
or go to the bathroom. If you have
older children who also need
your attention and your hands
to cuddle or help them, a sling
allows you to meet their needs as
well as most of the baby’s needs
more easily.
So which kind of sling
do you need
There is a bewildering array of
slings available. Of course you
can, and many baby wearers
do, have a different style of sling
for every occasion, from an easy
pouch, an everyday wrap, a
silk ring sling for glamour, or a
structured soft carrier for life in the
great outdoors.
Wrap slings are basically a long
piece of fabric that you tie around
yourself. They can look daunting
to the sling novice but the basic
positions are easily learned and
are well worth the effort. The
spread of fabric across your back,
particularly in a basic cross over
tie, gives good weight distribution.
The weight of the baby is spread
all over the back and then tied
round the hips, meaning that the
pelvis rather than the lower back
carries the bulk of the weight. A
stretchy wrap with a proportion
of Lycra or Spandex in the fabric
is often a good place to start,
particularly if the idea of tying
yourself up in five meters of cloth
is frightening. A stretchy one can
easily be tied into position while
the baby is safely elsewhere, and
worn as long as desired, allowing
you to take your baby in and out
as necessary. Many offer a good
variety of carrying positions,
cradle hold for newborns (and
ideal for breastfeeding), front, hip,
and back.
Woven wraps, especially in a
long length, give even more
variety and once you master the
art of tying in the back carrying
positions, a wrap that offers such
a possibility will allow you to
use the same sling from birth till
the moment your child has no
further need to be carried. There
are even varieties that work like
a wrap sling but have the tying
done for you.
If you wear your
baby in a sling you
can keep her at the
breast and still get up,
eat dinner, or go to the
bathroom.
Pouches and ring slings are
easy to use, simply put one arm
through and slip over the head.
It is important to get the size that
fits you comfortably to ensure
the safety and comfort of your
baby. Others are adjustable
and offer more flexibility if more
than one adult will be using the
same carrier. It is easy to slip
this type of carrier off with the
baby fast asleep in it and lay the
baby down. It’s great for a quick
transfer from car seat to sling
when you are out and about.
Mesh slings such as the Tonga,
designed to be worn in the shower
or swimming pool, are a useful
addition to your sling collection if
you have a baby who likes to be
close to you everywhere you go.
20 New Beginnings | Issue 2 | 2010

Feature article
Asian-style or Mai-tei carriers have
the advantage of great simplicity
and often come in the most
gorgeous designs. They offer front
and back carrying positions. They
are not the easiest to breastfeed
in, although women have done so.
(Slings that offer a cradle position
are the easiest for nursing.)
Structured soft carriers are also
easy to use as they are more likely
to have buckles and more shaped
fabric. They are often popular
with dads.
It is hard to overestimate the
importance of touch to the wellbeing
and development of a new
baby. Wearing your baby is good
for both of you. In a society that
urges new mothers to “get their
life back” following childbirth, a
sling enables you as a mother to
redefine that life and to broaden
your horizons to include rather
than exclude your baby. With
access to the security that your
body represents, your baby can
learn what it means to be human.
References
1. Hunziker U.A., Barr
R.G. Increased carrying
reduces infant crying: a
randomized controlled
trial. Pediatrics 1986
May; 77(5):641–8.
2. Liedloff, J. The
Importance of the In-Arms
Phase, Mothering, Winter
1989.
3. Wendy S. Biggs,
MD, The ‘Epidemic’
of Deformational
Plagiocephaly and the
American Academy of
Pediatrics’ Response
Journal of Prosthetics &
Orthotics, Vol 16, 2004;
5–9.
The CPSC (Consumer
Product Safety
Commission) issued a
warning against the use of
baby carriers and slings
on March 12, 2010. The
Academy of Breastfeeding
Medicine issued a press
release dated 3/19/2010
in response, which
you can read on
their Web site:
http://www.bfmed.org/
“ ”
Life’s Perfect Beginning
Mother’s milk & a nurturing touch
For a 3 min.preview,visit
Sarah Barnard
is the mother of a muchcarried
daughter, co-owner
of The Carrying Kind, and an
LLL Leader in London, UK.
Visit www.BabyBabyOhBaby.com for a 3 min. preview.
Photos
La Leche League International is
seeking high quality digital
photographs for use in various
media. If you would like to submit a
photo, you may send us a digital
file of your work.
Resolution: 300 (dpi = dots
per inch) and Size: 5”w x 7”h
(Payment for photos: Unless
specifically solicited by LLLI, photos
are not purchased. If your photo is
used, photo credit will be given.)
Send digital file(s) to:
photos@llli.org
2010 | Issue 2 | New Beginnings 21

Toddler Tips
Temper Tantrums
Mother’s
Situation
My three-year-old has
temper tantrums of
frightening intensity.
Everyone tells me
that she’ll grow
out of this, but I
am finding it very
difficult to cope
with, especially
when we are in public. Yesterday she had a
big tantrum in a store and lay on the floor
kicking and screaming. I hadn’t even started
my shopping and wasn’t able to do it. Lots of
people stared at me, making me feel angry,
flustered, and embarrassed. I feel confused
about how to deal with her outbursts. How do
others deal with tantrums
Photo: © shutterstock.com
Response
My daughter had challenges with
certain situations when she was
three. Even now that she’s six, we
still find there are times when her
resources are tapped and she just
can’t organize her behavior to
cope with a situation. One thing
my husband and I say is that
she sees and experiences life in
Technicolor, while the rest of us
see in shades of gray. Knowing
that she’s experiencing the world
with an intensity far greater than
our own helps us understand
her, and with that understanding
comes more patience and
empathy.
For me, the simplest coping
methods worked the best. I kept
trips short and focused. We
went on a full stomach and well
rested. I discussed with her my
expectations ahead of time. I
tried to reserve a portion of the
list for her alone, giving her the
responsibility for picking out the
juiciest apples, for example. If she
started to lose it, I’d get down on
her level and make eye contact,
focusing on her for a moment.
It’s easy to forget to do that when
you’re rushing through the store
or tending to other young ones.
That little bit of connection helped
her to re-center, though, and was
well worth the short delay in our
shopping trip.
I also had to recognize there were
certain times or situations (such
as the big holiday grocery trip
before visitors arrived) that were
beyond her ability to handle. I
would make other arrangements,
sometimes even doing the grocery
shopping at night while daddy put
the kids to bed at home!
Know that these days do not
last forever, and that an intense
child at three often develops
exceptional skills as she grows.
At six now, my daughter’s teacher
often comments on her fantastic
memory and her great attention
span. While the intensity was a
significant challenge in her toddler
years, I can see how it can help
Response
You are not alone! It can feel isolating and overwhelming to be going
through these challenges, especially when other mothers are not dealing
with these extreme behaviors. I always felt like I was the only one in
the store with a crying, screaming child. It can leave you feeling, “what
is wrong with me” and “what is wrong with my child” For me, the
solution has been to have my husband or parents watch my son and
my other toddler while I go shopping. No matter how hard I tried to
prepare my son on what he could and could not get on our shopping
trip, always making sure not to go when he was tired or hungry, the
inevitable tantrum would ensue. I’d get no shopping done and leave the
store feeling depleted and demoralized.
Having our groceries delivered by an online grocery store has been
another good solution for us. Hang in there! I hope things get easier for
us both in year four.
Karen Goetze, Geneva, IL, USA
Photo: © shutterstock.com
22 New Beginnings | Issue 2 | 2010

Toddler Tips
her be successful and I’m excited
now to see where she will go!
Karen Smith, St. Charles, IL,
USA
Response
My heart goes out to you! While
parenting a high need youngster,
I found he could not take a
sudden change of plans or even
a disappointment. I began to
brainstorm with him ahead of
time. I learned (the hard way) that
there were several things I could
not do without warning. I had to
tell him several days in advance
that an appointment, unpleasant
procedure, or a night out with my
husband was coming up. He would
have a huge meltdown the first
time I told him, but each day it got
better and by the day of the event,
we could go without incident. This
was also not a child who could be
told, “If you behave at the grocery
store, you can ride the merry go
round.” He did much better if you
let him ride the merry go round
when you passed it. If you did not
have time to ride it, or if you were
going to buy a toy for a cousin’s
birthday (and not for him), you had
to tell him long before you got to
the store.
I got many useful tips from How To
Talk So Kids Will Listen And Listen
So Kids Will Talk by Adele Faber
and Elaine Mazlish. The one I still
use with my second graders is
to identify the child’s unpleasant
feeling, give it a name, and even
commiserate with the child.
If tantrums continue to be a
problem I would suggest The
Explosive Child by Ross Greene. It
is a refreshing read for struggling
parents.
Theresa Kinzly, Peachtree
City, GA, USA
Photo: © shutterstock.com
Response
I remember days when my children
had those intense toddler tantrums.
Figuring out what to do at home
is much different than deciding
the best course of action in public.
Sometimes you can be proactive
about things at home before a
tantrum starts by offering a snack,
cutting a play date short, or
snuggling in for a nap.
I found that aborting the shopping
trip was for me almost always the
best way to handle it. Most grocery
stores have a large cooler where
they can store your full shopping
cart until you return later in the day
to finish up. I spent a lot of time
sitting in the back seat of the car
with my child while he screamed
and cried. And sometimes I cried
right along with him. When your
child has calmed down—perhaps
after breastfeeding, you may be
able to complete your to-do list.
Keep in mind that tantrums
are scary for our children and
sometimes for us, too. Those big,
bad feelings take over and our
little ones don’t yet have the coping
skills they need to move past the
hurt that caused them to lose all
self-control. Yes, some people will
stare. You may even be asked to
relocate. So long as you respect
your child’s need to vent in a safe
way that isn’t obtrusive to others
you’ll make it through another day
with your growing toddler.
We are the key to safety, both
physical and emotional. A child
hearing from his mother or father
that it’s okay to feel sad, mad,
frustrated, whatever, and that
crying is okay is more likely to
grow into an emotionally mature
adult.
Wendy Cohen, Savannah,
GA, USA
Response
Accept that toddler tantrums do
not mean you have failed as a
mother. Decide now that for the
next tantrum you will not feel
embarrassed, angry, or flustered.
Remember that your child does not
feel that she has any other way
to communicate with you. She is
letting you know that she wants to
exert control over her life. This is
a good thing in that she is trying
to become more independent.
It is bad because she is doing it
inappropriately.
Photo: © shutterstock.com
There are many ways to cope
with tantrums. If she is getting
frustrated, stop what you are
doing, get down on her level and
talk to her. If you find out what
she wants you can offer options
and alternatives. Talk pleasantly
and do not be in a hurry. Life is
going to continue and you only
have a few months of time when
this will be a problem. Teach your
daughter that you are there for
her.
Carol Oswald, Augusta,
Georgia, USA
Mother’s New
Situation
Yesterday, my
12-month-old, who has
a good number of teeth
now, bit me. I was so
startled that I pulled
him off and screamed.
This upset him and
he would not go back
to the breast until
bedtime, when he had
a sleepy feeding. I am
really anxious that he
might do it again. How
have other mothers
prevented their little
ones from biting
“Toddler Tips” is edited by LLL
Leader Karen Smith in St. Charles,
IL, USA. She and her husband,
John, have two children, Liam (8),
and Anastasia (6). Karen speaks
and writes on parenting topics as
well as writing fiction.
Please send responses and new
situations to toddler.tips@llli.org
2010 | Issue 2 | New Beginnings 23

Giving Birth
Alert and active
participation by the
mother in childbirth
is a help in getting
breastfeeding off to a
good start.
“Giving Birth” features stories about how
birth affects breastfeeding. Please send
stories that describe the impact of your
birth experience on breastfeeding. Articles
focused on specific issues relating to birth
and lactation are also welcome.
Sometimes, in spite of our intentions or expectations, birth does not
go according to plan. Although many of our prior decisions can shape
the way that labor and birth unfold, the unexpected can and does
happen, and the impact can be far-reaching. In the following story, Kate
describes how her hopes for a gentle birth were ended by a potential
medical emergency and how it affected her feelings for her baby
afterwards.
Kate’s Story
When birth doesn’t go as planned
With my fourth pregnancy, I planned a home birth. I hoped to have
my baby handed to me immediately when she emerged and then to
breastfeed her within minutes of the birth, as had happened with my
other three babies. I expected to have an easy birth because my last
two babies’ births had been very short—indeed one involved only two
pushes!
When I was pregnant with Caitlin, I had experienced symphysis pubis
displacement, a slight separation of the soft joint between the two pubic
bones in the pelvis. This is a common problem in pregnancy. It was
painful for me to walk. So, when I experienced dragging pains in my
abdomen during the last month of pregnancy and tests showed no clear
reason for them, we assumed these were ligament pains.
Around my due date, I started to bleed and went by ambulance to
hospital with stomach pains. I became exhausted and hysterical,
whereas during my previous labors I had remained calm and somehow
above the pain. I could not feel Caitlin moving forward in the birth
canal.
Photo: © inmagine.com
The appearance of meconium
in the amniotic fluid brought a
team of pediatricians into the
room. When my baby’s head
crowned but her shoulders could
not come out, there was a flurry
of activity in which the medical
team manipulated my legs into
very strange positions to help her
out. They did this so forcefully that
I was still experiencing back pain
13 months later. We soon saw
what the problem was. The cord
was wrapped around my baby’s
neck several times, then around
her shoulders, body, and legs.
As she engaged, and was then
expelled, the cord was tugging on
both of us. I had been at risk of
an abruption (the placenta tearing
away from the wall of the uterus,
which can deprive the baby of
oxygen and cause heavy bleeding
in the mother). Caitlin was grey
and floppy with a low Agpar
score because of the shock.
At that point no one thought of my
birth plan. They were preoccupied
with giving her oxygen, while
I just lay with my eyes closed,
feeling relieved that the pain was
over and occasionally asking if
she was breathing. They showed
her to me and then took her away
to the NICU, saying that I could
see her when I had had a shower
and felt better.
When I did see her an hour later,
she was clean, dressed in a
diaper, and lying in an incubator
with a tube down her nose. It
didn’t seem like she was my baby
at all. I cried because I pitied her
for having such a hard time, but I
felt no love for her. I believe now
that she should have been given
to me as soon as her breathing
was established, but hospital
procedure got in the way.
She did not need to be tube fed
immediately, but that is what was
deemed necessary. I said that
I wanted to breastfeed, but the
hospital staff kept tube feeding her
“to get her blood sugar level up.”
Although some nurses said, “Of
course you can pick her up, she is
24 New Beginnings | Issue 2 | 2010

Giving Birth
your baby,” one nurse told me not
to come during the doctor’s rounds
as I would be in the way, and
kept shooing me away “to rest.”
The fact that I was tired and alone
made me tolerate this for some
time, but when my milk came in
on day three, I just took her and
fed her myself.
They were surprised that her blood
sugar level shot up even though
I had stopped her tube feedings.
If I had not been confident that
she needed my milk and needed
me we would probably not
have started breastfeeding. As
for bonding with my daughter,
I knew that that would come in
time, and I made a special effort
to encourage the process by
always stroking Caitlin while we
breastfed—her downy head, her
little feet, over and over.
I can’t say exactly when those
feelings of displacement and
distance went, but now I adore my
little girl.
Kate Rayner, Cambridge, GB
How traumatic birth
makes us feel
When birth is traumatic, it’s
not surprising that mothers may
feel indifferent or even resentful
toward their babies. Mothers may
be recovering from unexpected
surgery if they had an emergency
cesarean section, or perhaps
the event was frightening and a
mother felt out of control. It is this
lack of control that often affects
women the most. Sheila Kitzinger,
the British birth author and activist,
notes that women will perceive
their birth experience as a
negative one if they are unhappy
with the setting in which they
gave birth and by the way they
were treated. Rules, restrictions,
rigid protocols, personal neglect,
bossiness, unkindness, shift
changes, and the appearance
Breastfeeding has
the advantage
that physical
contact is inevitable,
and time spent touching
and holding the baby
can be comforting and
will help mother and
baby establish their
relationship.
of nameless strangers, are all
cited as reasons why women
may feel their birth was traumatic
(Kitzinger, 2006; 11). And if
a new mother feels inherently
uncared for, she may not muster
up enough energy and enthusiasm
to care for her new baby.
Indeed, she may even blame the
baby for the awful experience.
And it is made harder by the
fact that everyone is likely to be
fussing around the new baby and
telling the mother how lucky she is
to have such a beautiful child.
Somewhere deep inside the
mother knows this, but it may take
a while for her to feel attached
and loving toward her baby.
Many mothers describe the early
days as simply going through the
motions—acting like a mother,
but not really feeling like one.
Kitzinger uses the term “robot”
to describe the traumatized new
mother who is unable to respond
in an emotionally positive and
spontaneous way (Kitzinger,
2006; 122).
When birth goes well—and
this usually means a gentle,
intervention-free birth—then a
mother’s body will produce a
range of hormones that will make
her feel good. As the baby is
born she will experience a surge
of endorphins that make her feel
euphoric. This happy, confident
state will make her very receptive
to welcoming and nurturing her
baby (Robertson, 2004; 44). When
a traumatic birth gets in the way
of this boost of confidence and
euphoria, it’s hardly surprising that
mothers may not be particularly
responsive to their babies
immediately after the trials of labor.
The good news is that feelings can
and do change, over time. Bonding
is a gradual process.
Breastfeeding has the advantage
that physical contact is inevitable,
and time spent touching and
holding the baby can be comforting
and will help mother and baby
establish their relationship.
Although breastfeeding problems
may sometimes seem to exacerbate
a mother’s struggles after a
traumatic birth, managing to
breastfeed successfully may be a
very healing process as it helps
women to feel in control and
empowered as they nurture and
nourish their babies.
Kathleen Kendall-Tackett, PhD,
IBCLC, LLL Leader, encourages
mothers to process their traumatic
births. “Talking to someone who
has shared similar experiences
provides validation of your feelings,
just as breastfeeding mothers find
validation at La Leche League
meetings. Sometimes, just talking
about your feelings with a good
friend can help you sort things out
and calm any fears or anxieties.”
Kendall-Tackett always encourages
mothers to get copies of their
medical records. “If possible, talk
with your health care provider or
someone else who can help you
understand the events that occurred
during your birth. It is also helpful
to read books that might put your
birth experience in a broader
perspective.” See “Making Peace
with Your Birth Experience” New
Beginnings, issue 5 & 6 2009;
50–55.
By talking about her birth
experience and seeking counselling,
if necessary, a mother can
understand and come to terms with
what’s happened and then move
on. This will help her connect with
her baby and give him the love he
needs.
References
Kitzinger, S. Birth Crisis,
Routledge, 2006.
Robertson, A. The Midwife
Companion, third edition,
Birth International, 2004.
The Breastfeeding Answer
Book, third revised edition,
Schaumburg, IL: La Leche
League International, 2002.
If you would like to talk with
someone about your birth
experience, you may find
the Birth Crisis Network
helpful. See http://www.
sheilakitzinger.com/
BirthCrisis.htm
“Giving Birth” is edited by Sara
Walters, who lives in Carmarthen,
South Wales, GB. She has had two
American hospital births (Rebecca
in 1999 and Jonathan in 2002)
and one British homebirth (Catrin
in 2006).
Please send submissions to
editornb@llli.org
2010 | Issue 2 | New Beginnings 25

Making It Work
That Time of
The Day
Mother’s Situation
The most hectic part of my day is coming
home to a messy kitchen sink with breakfast
dishes still on the table and no ideas for
dinner. How do other employed mothers make
the most of this short but important part of
the day with their babies when housework
and meals demand their time and attention
Response
Sitting down to nurse my baby after the day’s separation is my top
priority on arriving home. While I’m doing that, I can chat to my schoolaged
children about their day or listen to them read or recite spellings,
for instance. We eat very simply to save precious time that we need to
reconnect. Meals that can be put together in five minutes are the sort I
favor! We also eat a lot of raw vegetables and bread and cheese. I can
tackle more elaborate dishes on the weekend.
We have had to lower our standards of household order since I went
back to work although spending less time in the house means it doesn’t
get quite as messy as it used to!
I try to remember to put the dishwasher and washing machine on before
going to bed and unload both first thing in the morning before breakfast.
Being organized about doing the little jobs means that things don’t get
unmanageable.
My husband helps by putting out the garbage, picking up groceries on
his way home, and putting the children to bed while I nurse our baby.
It isn’t easy when there don’t seem to be enough hours in the day, but
I find it helps to remind myself that my family comes first and that my
children would rather have cuddles and plain food than watch me spend
hours in the kitchen or cleaning the house.
Susan Long, Chicago, IL, USA
Photo: © inmagine.com
Response
I think that it really helps to plan your meals before you do the shopping.
Always decide in the morning what you are going to cook for dinner.
Perhaps alternate some responsibility with your husband. If you are
picking up your child and he is going to be home first can your husband
do the dishes If he has a real aversion to dishes or housework can he
cook If he can do none of those can he go to get your child instead so
you can cook We do all of these. We plan our meals and my husband
helps in the kitchen. We also alternate who is going to pick up our son.
Shelly Alvarez, Oakland, CA, USA
Response
Delegate! Delegate! Delegate!
Seriously, one approach you could take is to prioritize tasks and
delegate some, just as you might be used to doing at work. And this is
where being a breastfeeding mother really pays off—since breastfeeding
and reconnecting with your baby must take priority, and you are the
only one who can breastfeed, the other tasks will have to be delegated.
You can justifiably put your feet up and have a breather while your
partner and any older children tackle the chores. Then, once you are
revived, and your baby is either settled or revived, you can rejoin the
fray, at which point the others can, if necessary, take over care of the
baby or have a break themselves. If your baby is awake and alert, you
could pop him/her in a sling while you go about the various chores.
26 New Beginnings | Issue 2 | 2010

Making It Work
To make the situation easier
on everyone, you could also
try the following.
• Getting up a little earlier in the
morning to give yourself time to
clear the breakfast table before
leaving for work.
• Keeping housework to a
minimum and once again
delegating as much of it as
possible—if you have older
children, give them set tasks to do
in return for pocket money.
• Planning your dinner menus
for the week in advance (when
you have a quiet moment), so
that there is no last-minute panic
at a time when you are tired and
unlikely to have much inspiration.
• Taking short-cuts with meals,
cooking double quantities so
that you can freeze a portion for
another day; opting for simpler
dishes mid-week (soups and
stews that just involve throwing
everything into one pot, or “nocook”
salads in summer); even
the occasional ready meal or
“take-away.”
Good luck with “making it work”
for you!
Gwyneth Little, East Lothian,
UK
Response
I am a fairly creative person when
it comes to food. I work full time
out of the home and I make homemade
meals, every single day of
the week.
I have made a deal with
my husband: he empties the
dishwasher and I fill it as I go
about my food prep.
When I get home, I will look over
what food we have in the house
and then I’ll choose a meat, a
vegetable, and noodles or rice.
If I’m really tired, I will just throw
some cooked ground meat or
sausage into a pot with a can of
mixed vegetables, a can of broth,
and one can of water. Depending
on flavor, I’ll add a can of diced
tomatoes, a can of white beans,
or a handful of elbow macaroni.
Then I’ll leave it to cook, stir it
occasionally and voilà supper
with very little effort.
Cyndie, Oklahoma, USA
Response
When I was faced with a similar
dilemma, I decided I simply could
no longer cope with working
outside the home. I was fortunate
enough to be able to change my
hours and work part time. Now
my home is a bit more organized
and I have a little more time for
my children. This may well not
be an option you have. A friend
of mine is able to do some of her
work from home a few days a
week, which frees up the time she
would otherwise spend traveling
to and from her office.
Other mothers I know have started
their own businesses out of their
homes in order to spend more
time with their families.
Good luck finding your way.
There is never one right solution!
Geraldine P., New York, NY,
USA
Mother’s New
Situation
I was so looking forward
to having my baby and
starting to run my own
business from home. I
expected there to be a
period of adjustment,
of course, but now six
months after my son’s
birth, I am still feeling
blue. I have no good
reason to feel this way
because I have a lovely
baby, a supportive
family, and network
of friends. However, I
am finding every day a
struggle, even if I have
a good night’s sleep. I
have a live-in au pair,
whom my baby adores,
and I can nurse my baby
whenever he needs
me. My business is
reasonably successful.
Why am I so sad I often
find myself in tears, for
instance, if I hear a sad
story on the news and
incapable of doing my
everyday business tasks.
Have other new mothers
had these prolonged
blues and how have you
coped
Please send your responses to
our Making it Work Mother’s
New Situation to
making.it.work@llli.org
2010 | Issue 2 | New Beginnings 27

Eating Wisely
Keeping It Simple
Good nutrition means eating a well-balanced
and varied diet of foods in as close to their
natural state as possible.
I’m always looking for simple nutritious food that I can prepare quickly
for my family, my two-year-old daughter with a big and eclectic appetite,
my four-year-old son, who can be described politely as “conservative” in
his tastes, and my husband, who says he likes his food “substantial and
tasty.”
Sometimes I’m organized and manage to make our evening meals
during the day. At other times, I have to get a meal on the table as
quickly as possible while keeping my daughter from having her five
o’clock meltdown and having an in-depth discussion about planes and
submarines with my son.
Although this lentil bake is not a meal that can be prepared particularly
quickly it’s really tasty and filling. Everyone who tried it liked it! If you
wanted you could spice it up a bit with some chili powder.
Lois Rowlands, West Sussex, GB
Nutritional Facts
Lentils
Lentils are pulses and are rich in protein but they do not constitute a
complete protein in themselves. When combined with a grain, however,
they do form a first class protein, which makes them very suitable for
vegetarian cookery. Apart from protein, pulses contain carbohydrates,
vitamins (particularly B), and minerals (notably iron). Lentils do not
require soaking and cook quickly. You can use them in purees, bakes,
burgers, and curries. They can also be sprouted very successfully.
Oats
Oats are a highly nutritious grain. They contain carbohydrates, protein,
and fat. They are also a good source of iron, potassium, and Vitamin B.
LLL Leader Kimberley Wells says “This lentil bake was delicious at our La
Leche League spring workshop as part of the buffet ‘pot luck’ lunch.”
Lentil Cheese and Oat Bake
by Nicola Crossland, Milton Keynes, GB
Serves 4
Ingredients
170g (6 oz) red lentils
420 ml (3/4 pint or 1 1/2 cups) water
1 tsp oil
2 onions, peeled and chopped
4 heaped tablespoons
porridge oats
2 stalks celery, thinly sliced (or
one red pepper diced)
1 carrot, finely chopped or grated
125g (4 1/2 oz) cheese, grated
1 tsp dried mixed herbs
2 tablespoons tomato puree
Method
Put lentils in a pan with the water. Bring to the boil and simmer
 for
15–20 minutes until soft and moist. Drain. 

Heat oil and fry onions until
soft. Add oats, celery, cheese,
 carrot, herbs, tomato puree and drained
lentils. Mix well.

 Put into a lightly greased shallow ovenproof dish or
tin, bake in a 
preheated oven at 350 F/180°C/Gas Mark 4, for about
30 minutes.

 The bake is soft when warm but firmer when cold and can
be eaten hot or 
cold.
“Eating Wisely” is edited by LLL Leader Lesley Robinson.
She lives in Ottawa, Canada with husband, Mark.
Her three grown children have flown the nest.
Please send stories and photos to eating.wisely@llli.org
Photo courtesy of Lois Rowlands
Adapted from an article in LLLGB’s Breastfeeding Matters.
28 New Beginnings | Issue 2 | 2010

World Breastfeeding Week Celebrations
World Breastfeeding
Week Celebration
Winners
Over 10,500 people participated in events across the USA for World
Breastfeeding Week Celebrations in 2009, raising almost $52,000. The
fundraising efforts will be used to continue to help mothers and babies to
know the joys and benefits of breastfeeding.
See the box for the list of prize sponsors. This year’s first prize winner
was Susan Vicknair Theall. She raised over $2000 for La Leche League of
Jefferson, Louisiana.
LLL of Jefferson held a Baby & Child Expo at a local mall. They were
allowed to use the mall and 45 tables for free. Local businesses paid to
reserve tables, volunteers gave half-hour talks, teens provided children’s
crafts, and snacks and drinks were donated by a health food store. A bag
of samples was given to every family who signed in. Items were listed in
the program for an eBay auction.
Leader Susan Vicknair Theall commented: “Several of the tables are
reserved for our breastfeeding information displays and we hang large
breastfeeding posters on the columns around our area. One of our tables
has information for parents to take home and we also provide all of
the medical professionals with gift bags of free tear-off sheet pads. Our
meeting information is also in the program. This is a wonderful way to
educate our community about our organization and the resources available
to pregnant women and nursing mothers.”
Individual prizes were awarded to 41 people, who raised between $250
and $1999 during their WBWC events. 21 Groups received a total of
$2,702.62 in Group rebates. (Rebates were awarded to the Groups who
raised over $750.36.) Groups were awarded participation incentive
prizes.
To view the entire list of winners, go to
www.lllusa.org/wbw/ and click on Reports.
Pam Dunne, LLL USA
THANK YOU TO THE WORLD BREASTFEEDING
WEEK CELEBRATIONS 2009 PRIZE SPONSORS!!!
PLATINUM Dual Elite LEVEL
($5,000+)
ERGO Baby Carrier, Inc.
Mothering magazine
Motherlove Herbal Company
GOLD LEVEL ($1500)
Ameda Breastfeeding
Products
EMERALD LEVEL ($750+)
Sleepy Wrap, Inc.
RUBY LEVEL (500+)
gDiapers
Mother’s Milk Tea
by Traditional Medicinals
SILVER LEVEL (200+)
Breast Pumps Direct
Mama Knows Breast
Platypus Media
Science Naturally!
BRONZE LEVEL
(Cottage Industry)
Blessed Nest
Cozy Cocoon
Over the Shoulder
Baby Holder
Umbilical Card
A Very Special Thank You to the 2009
WORLD BREASTFEEDING WEEK CELEBRATIONS DONORS!!!
Your support means so much to mothers
and babies in the USA.
$500 Donors($5,000+)
Gina Ciagne, Lansinoh Laboratories
$300 Donor
Uncle Ray’s Dairyland & Mini Golf
2010 | Issue 2 | New Beginnings 29

Pre-Order...
The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding
now through July 18, 2010
New
8th
Edition
Help Make this book
a New York Times best seller
Your order makes a difference – be a part of history!
PaperBack
Books will ship after July 13,
eBooks
Amazon Kindle Edition
Reader Daily Edition
Questions
30 New Beginnings | Issue 2 | 2010

No. 10220
feeding
No. 10221
No. 10238
his needs.
infection.
supply!
Mothering Matters
New items
store.llli.org
Go Global with the LLLI International bag! made from 100%
recycled materials. Reusable for groceries, to tote personal items, and to show
your support for breastfeeding mothers and babies around the world!
(Measures 13x13x5.)
Medications and Mothers’ Milk
by Thomas W. Hale, PhD
New 14th edition, provides on-the-spot information on the impact of
currently used medications on breastfeeding mothers and infants.
Stillen: einfach nur stillen
(Breastfeeding Pure and Simple)
by Gwen Gotsch
Vermittelt Ihnen genaue Informationen und vor allem die
Begeisterung, die Sie brauchen, um Ihr Baby am Anfang
und in den vielen kommenden Monaten zu stillen.
http://store.llli.org/public/profile/350
LLLI Information Sheets (Tear-Off)*
provide easy-to-read, and research-based
mothering topics/information for new moms. (50 sheets per pad)
*Available in Spanish, and will be available in additional languages soon!
A Guide to
Pumping
Your Milk
When Baby Is Unable to Come to Breast
or Can’t Breastfeed We l
957 North Plum Grove Road • SchaumburgIL60173USA
847.519.7730 • fax 847.969.0460 • 800.LALECHE
find tha they can forgo the middle-of-the-night pumping. Other
mothers need to maintain that middle-of-the-night pumping in
order to protect their a l-day supply until they are about four
Sometimes a baby is unable to come to breast or can’t drain the months postpartum.
breasts we l enough to maintain mother’s milk supply. Such situations
can include prematurity, hospitalization for serious i lne s, a
Some mothers find that once they have had an established fu l milk
physical condition such as cleft palate, and other conditions. If you
supply for abou two weeks, they can return the rental hospitalgrade
pump and purchase a retail electric double pump. The pack-
must establish a milk supply for a baby who cannot do so, your best
choice is a hospital-grade breast pump. These pumps are very
aging for such a pump should not say “For Occasional Use.”
expensive to purchase (usua ly over $1,000whennew), so they are
However, these double pumps were not rea ly designed for maintaining
a milk supply when baby is unable to come to breast or feed
usua ly rented, though some mothers choose to purchase them.
we l at breast. Other mothers find that if they try to switch away
The ability of the breasts to produce enough milk for a larger baby from a hospital-grade pump, their milk supply starts to drop in a
i set during th early postpartum weeks. Even if you have a tiny week or two, and they need to go back to using the hospital-grade
premature baby, you wan to be able to expre s about 30 ounces pump to rebuild and maintain their milk supply.
(900 ml) every 24 hours by two weeks postpartum. If you are not
producing that much milk by two weeks, you may wan to contact
Some mothers dislike the sound of an electric breast pump so much
an LLL Leader or lactation consultant for suggestions for increasing
tha they have a hard time releasing (le ting down) their milk. For
your milk supply. The best way to establish optimum milk production
is to mimic the nursing frequency of a newborn. Mothers
some of these mothers, using two one-handed manual pumps or a
pedal pump may be a be ter choice. However, when using manual
should pump at least eigh to 10 times every 24 hours. You may
pumps to maintain supply for a baby who can’t nurse we l, it is very
choose to pump every three hours, or you may choose to pump
important that the mother pay very close a tention to making every
every two to two and a half hours during the day and take one
suction stroke as similar as po sible to each other, and that she perform
50 to 55 suction strokes per minute.
longer, five-hour stretch at night. (Timing is counted from the start
of one pumping se sion to the start of the next pumping se sion.)
Most mothers stimulate a higher prolactin level and therefore a
larger milk supply if they pump both breasts at the same time
(“double pumping”), rather than pumping one breast and then the
other. Double pumping also saves significant time through the Most mothers who experience separation of five hours or more
course of the day. Pumping 10 to 15 minutes for a single baby or (perhaps even several days due to travel) wi l need to pump their
20 minutes if you have multiples is usua ly su ficient.
milk to protec their milk supply. Any retail double breast pumps
that do not state “For Occasional Use” are very good for thi situation.
There are also somenon-hospital-graderentalpumpsavail-
lishing a fu l milk supply. Once a fu l supply (30 ounces every 24 able, usua ly for a cheaperfeethanhospital-gradepumps, that can
A middle-of-the-nightpumpingsesionisveryimportantinestab-
hours) has been established for abou two weeks, some mothers be used for this type of pumping. Again, a mother should make
© May 2009, La Leche League International
Breastfeeding mothers may find themselves
in a variety of situations in which it
seems nece sary for them to pump their
milk. If you find the need to use a breast
pump, you may wan to know which type is
best suited to your needs. With practice,
almost any type of pump wi l work, but different
situations may make one type of
pump preferable to another. You may also
want to become familiar with manual or
hand-expre sion as this can be useful in
many situations. Information on manual
expre sion can be found in LLL publications,
The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding
and Manual Expre sion of Breast Milk—
Marmet Technique, or by contacting a La
Leche League Leader in your area.
The fo lowing describes the most common
reasons mothers use breast pumps and the
considerations that might make one type
of pump preferable over another.
When Mother is Separated from Baby
Due to Work, School, or Travel
This informational sh et may not be reproduced in any manner
without wri ten permi sion from La Leche League International.
Care Plan for
Mastitis
Mastitis is an inflammation of the breast. It is usua lycaused
by backed up milk in a section of the breast. This
can progre s to an infection if no treated. Delayed nipple
wound healing, stre s, chronic engorgement, persistentbreast
pain, and breast ma ses (with or without fever)
increase the risk of mastitis. Areas of the breast that
remain undrained or that experience plugge ducts may
be focal points for bacteria to take hold and start an infective
proce s. Milk production may drop from the a fected
breast for a few days during the worst of the symptoms,
but it is important for the baby to continue breastfeeding
from that side to help preven the infection from turning
into an absce s. The milk from the a fected breast wi l not
harm the baby.
Mastitis most frequently recurs when the bacteria are resistant or
not sensitive to the prescribed antibiotic, when antibiotics are not
continued long enough, when an inco rect antibiotic is prescribed,
when the mother stops nursing on the a fected side, or when the
initial cause of the mastitis has not been addre sed (such as milk
stasis). If mastitis recurs, make sure that a culture and sensitivity
test is done on the milk to discover exactly what organism is
involved and what antibiotic wi l eliminate it. Many organisms are
resistan to common antibiotics and repeated use of ine fective
medications increases the risk of an absce s.
Mastitis caused by methici lin resistant Staph aureus (MRSA) is
becoming more prevalent. Increased risk for hospital-acquired
MRSA, a virulent and di ficul to treat situation, i seen in mothers
with a cesarean delivery, administration of antibiotics in the peripartum
period, mothers with multiple gestation, and mothers who
have experienced in vitro fertilization. Outpatient infection with
MRSA also is becoming more common.
Establishing
Prevention
Your Milk Supply
Prevention is the best line of defense.
Tip 1: Nurs early and often.
• Avoid going for long periods of time between feedings
• Make sure that a l areas of the breast are we l drained at each
• Addre s any areas of the breas that remain hard by ma saging
while nursing
• Quickly begin to take care of plugge ducts. Ma sage over
and/or behind the blockage has been the commonly used
A baby’s need for milk and his mother’s ability
to produce it in just the right quantity is one
of nature’s most perfect examples of the law of
supply and demand. Understanding how the milk
supply is established and regulated makes it easier
to maintain an ample milk supply. Here are 10 tips
to help you.
© August 2009, La Leche League International
For more information
www. li.org
© January 2010, La Leche League International
957 North Plum Grove Road • SchaumburgIL60173USA
847.519.7730 • fax 847.969.0460 • 800.LALECHE
way to reduce and disperse the material obstructingtheduct.
A di ferent approac has been recommended whereby the
mother ma sages in front of the lump toward the nipple.
Begin by ma saging close to the nipple, reposition the massage
farther back until you are ma saging directly in front of
the blockage. This is though to help clear the way through
convoluted ductwork that may not be in straight alignmentto
the nipple. Plugged ducts require prompt a tention, because
they can start a cascade of events that leads to breast inflammation
and breast infection.
• Troubleshoo the cause of sore or damaged nipples. Get help
from a La Leche League Leader, an International Board
Certified Lactation Consultant (IBCLC), or other expert in
breastfeeding to make sure that your baby is positioned,
latched, and suckling co rectly. Once a break in the skin
occurs, it increases your chances of a breast infection.
Consider the use of a suitabl emo lien that i safe for the
baby to ingest, such as HPA Lanolin. This can be soothing
and speed healing of a cracked nipple. You also may wish to
talk to your doctor about applying a medicated ointmen to
the damaged nipple to decrease the likelihood of a breast
• Due to the link between severe nipple sorene s and infection
of the nipple by Staph aureus, some experts recommend
careful washing of the nipple with soap and water and the
application of a medicated ointmen to promote wound healing
and prevent progre sion to an infection that can eventua
ly a fec the breast. Talk with your doctor abou this type
of breast infection.
957 North Plum Grove Road • Schaumburg IL 60173 USA
847.519.7730 • fax 847.969.0460 • 800-LALECHE
This informational sheet may not be reproduced in any manner
without wri ten permission from La Leche League International.
This is the key to establishing a abundant milk supply and ge ting
If you find that your baby regularly sl eps more than thr e hours between
breastf eding o f to a good start. Mothers who nurse their babies within an
feedings, he may n ed to be awakened for f edings at least every two hours
half hour after birth and continue to nurse at frequent, unrestricted intervals
during the day until your milk supply is we l established. If the baby begins to
are more likely to establish a good milk supply than mothers who nurse on a
nurse less frequently, there wi l be a co responding drop in milk production. If
restricted feeding schedule.
nursings continue to be spaced farther and farther apart or if the baby nurses
less vigorously or for a shorter period of time at each f eding, the milk supply
wi l diminish. The law of supply and demand also works in reverse: the le s often
the baby nurses, the le s milk there wi l be.
The breast produces milk almost continuously. Frequent nursing and e fective
suckling signal the mother’s body to produce the amount of milk her baby
n eds. So the more often the baby nurses, the more milk the breast wi l Usua ly around 3 weeks, 6 w eks, 3 months and 6 months of age you may
make. This simple rule of supply and demand is the key to establishing and notice your baby nursing more often. A lowing your baby to nurse more often
maintaining an abundant milk supply.
for two or thr e days around these times will increase your milk supply to m et
Tip 2: The more the baby nurses, the more
milk there wi l be.
Tip 3: Newborns usua ly nurs every one to two hours, or at
least ten to 12 times in a 24 hour period.
This frequent nursing is nature’s way of not only helping the mother provide a
wonderful source of comfort and nutrition for her newborn, but also to help Your baby may be nursing often because he
the mother’s milk supply to become quickly established. Enjoy these special likes the f eling of security from the close body
nursing se sions and bond with your baby.
contact that comes with nursing, because he
n eds to satisfy his suckling n ed, or because
he finds the sound of your heartbeat and the
gentlene s of your touch a great source of comfort
Your baby needs to nurse long enough to get the hindmilk, the milk that comes as he adjusts to his new world. If you have any further
toward the end of a f eding as it is creamy and high in calories. Encourage the questions or concerns, be sure to contact your La Leche
baby, if wi ling, to nurse from both breasts at least 10 to 15 minutes on each League Leader or other breastf eding specialist.
side. It may take the milk two or three minutes to “let down,” or start to flow,
especia ly in the beginning. Babies who have had enough hindmilk usua ly have
relaxed bodies and may fa l asl ep at the breast. If your baby suckled both
breasts at the f eding, start the next f eding with the breast the baby nursed
from last. (Often sma l infants, like late preterm infants, only take one breast at
a f eding the first few days, and they do just fine if they are nursing frequently
enough.)
Tip 4: Don’t look at the clock, look at your baby.
Tip 5: Be sure your baby i suckling e fectively.
Milk production depends on milk removal. Watch baby for signs of milk
removal. Does your baby have a large mouthful of breast ti sue Can you s e
baby’s tongue betw en your breast and their lower gum Are baby’s temples
moving as baby swa lows Can you hear baby swa lowing your milk Do you
f e like your breast has b en drained after baby comes o f the breast These
questions may be helpful in a se sing weather your baby is removing milk from
the breast. Sore or cracked nipples may be an indicator of improper latch or
positioning at the breast.
Tip 6: Breastfed babies feed more often than formula
fed babies.
K ep in mind that since human milk is perfectly suited to your baby, it wi l be
digested more rapidly and completely than non-breastmilk substitutes like
cow’s milk or soy-based formulas. Your breastfed baby wi l be ready to eat
again sooner than his bo tle-fed counterpart. Remember the law of supply and
demand that is at work here—the more often the baby nurses, the more milk
your body wi l produce for your baby.
Tip 7: Count diapers to check if your baby is ge ting
enough to eat.
Sometimes a mother finds herself thinking that her baby is nursing “all the
time,” and wonders if this means that she doesn’t have enough milk to satisfy
him. If he has six to eight wet cloth diapers (five to six disposables) and two
to five bowel movements per day (beginning the third day after birth) and is
not being given anything but your milk, you can be sure he is ge ting plenty of
nourishment. An older baby may have bowel movements le s frequently, but
they should be plentiful.
Tip 8: You may need to wake your baby for feedings.
Tip 9: Growth spurts cause babies to nurse more often.
Tip 10: Remember that newborns nurse for many
reasons other than hunger.
** Breastfed newborns
should regain their birth
weight by 10 days to two
weeks of age. A baby who
is not gaining we l should
be checked by a doctor.
This informational sheet may not be reproduced in any manner
without wri ten permi sion from La Leche League International.
Increasing
Your
Milk
One of the most common
reasons mothers give for weaning
sooner than they had planned
is concern about milk supply.
Living in a culture that is used
to measuring everything, it can
be difficult for mothers to trust
the breast when they cannot
see how much milk is inside it
or going into the baby. When
doubts begin to set in, mothers
often receive we l-intentioned
but poor advice that may even
make the situation worse.
Fortunately, there are ways to
know if you are making enough
milk and ways to help increase
it, if needed. Understanding
how milk supply works and the
things that can cause problems
is key to finding the best way to
increase your milk.
For more information
li.org
How Milk Supply Works
© February 2010, La Leche League International
No. 10245
For more information
li.org
957 North Plum Grove Road • Schaumburg IL 60173 USA
847.519.7730 • fax 847.969.0460 • 800-LALECHE
to eat more than your breasts
have stored up a the moment,
he wi l keep nursing and draining
your breasts until milk production
speeds up to meet his needs. If
you are making more than he
wants, the leftover milk he leaves
inside signals your breas to make
less and less until your supply
matches what he needs. How
often your baby feeds ultimately is
determined not by his age but by
your milk storage capacity—the
size of the warehouse in your milk
factory. The babies whose mothers
can store lots of milk may take
larger feedings less often, while the
babies of mothers with less storage
space get sma ler meals and may
feed more often.
How Do You Know if Your
Milk Supply is Low
Baby behaviors like fussing after
nursing, feeding often, or feeding
for short or long periods of time,
within two to four days, milk production kicks or changes such as softer breasts or less
into high gear. From tha time on, the factory leakage, may or may not indicate a low milk
—your breasts—determine how much milk to supply. These behaviors are often just part of
make by how much milk your baby takes out. the normal course of breastfeeding. Whereas
That puts your baby in charge of your milk in the early weeks the breasts are fu l and
sometimes hard, this is related to additional
fluids in the breasts as we l as extra milk over
and beyond what your baby needs. As the
When a fu l-term, healthy baby is a lowed
fluid is lost and your breasts se tle into milk
to nurse as often and as long as he needs,
production that matches your baby’s needs,
a good supply of milk is usua ly established.
the breasts wi l feel softer—even though
Most babies eat 8-12 times a day. If the baby
there is plenty of milk in them, and more on
is unable to do the job due to premature
the way! Sometimes an increase in frequency
birth, separation, i lness, or another condition,
o feeding is an indication of an increase in
milk must be removed from your breasts
your baby’s need for “mommy time,” and does
by other means or else the milk factory wi l
not reflect a supply problem. The best way
begin to shut down. If you and your baby find
to te l is to look at your baby’s diaper output
yourselves in this situation and taking into
and weight gain. In the first 6-8 weeks, most
consideration how may times a day your baby
babies have at least 5-7 good wet diapers and
nurses e fectively a the breast, pumping up to
at least 3-4 stools larger than a US quarter
8-12 times each 24 hours wi l help to ensure
(2.5 cm). As they get older, they have fewer
a good milk supply. If your baby is not feeding
but larger bowel movements. From the time
directly a the breast, a good goal for the
their mothers’ milk comes in until four to six
During pregnancy, the breasts build a milk amount of milk you pump per day is at least
months of age, the babies should gain around
factory in preparation for feeding your baby. 25 to 30 ounces (750-900mls).
5-7 ounces (150-210 grams) per week.
Hormones from the placenta aid this process,
Weight gain slows down gradua ly for the
and for mothers ca rying multiple babies, extra Your milk factory is always making milk.
rest of the first year. Your baby’s health care
hormones create an even bigger milk factory. When your breasts are drained often, they
provider can te l you if he is continuing to gain
Once the baby is born and the placenta comes make more milk faster. If milk builds up and
appropriately or if there is cause for concern.
out, the milk factory opens for business and isn’t removed often or for a while, they make
milk more slowly. If your baby decides he wants
This informational sheet may not be reproduced in any manner
without wri ten permission from La Leche League International.
For more information
li.org
Survivor Moms Mickey Sperlich, MA, CPM and Julia Seng, PhD, CNM
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2010 | Issue 2 | New Beginnings 31

To Honor and Remember
To Honor
Sarah Chaikin
With deep appreciation for Sarah’s help upon the birth
(and breastfeeding start!) of our daughter Aviva. Without
your help, I would not have been able to share the joy of
breastfeeding with my daughter. From Cathrin Weinstein,
Margate City, NJ
Betsy Belle Eadie
Happy 65th birthday, 45th anniversary and 34th year as
an LLL Leader! Thank you for being an amazing Mom and
Grandmother. Love, Your Children and Grandchildren
Cindy Garza
Thanks for introducing us to LLL. Happy Mother’s Day. We
love you. Elias and Dubraska Wawi, Houston, TX
Jan Kozub
To my dear friend and Wilbraham LLL leader for over 40
years!! - Happy Birthday Jan Kozub. I admire and honor
you for helping so many breastfeeding families over the
years. Because of your dedication, love, support and clinical
expertise so many have succeeded to breastfeed despite huge
obstacles. You are the best. Thank you for being my mentor,
friend and respected LLL leader. Love, Nancy Aberdale,
Venice, FL
Ruri Lane
Ruri is an acquaintance of Sue Counselman. It was through
Sue that I heard of Ruri’s predicament. I would like to honor
Ruri through my donation to LLLI. From Monica Syler, San
Francisco, CA
Evy and Marc Simon
Happy 50th Wedding Anniversary!
Best Wishes and Love, Les Duman, Wyncote, PA
Helena K. Solis
Dear Mom, Thank you for your support in my extended
breastfeeding of Finn. Love, Sandra, Woodhaven, NY
To Remember
Molly Ortne
Mother, grandmother, sister, friend.
You are loved and missed by so many.
From Christine Smith, Lakeland, FL
Jan Graham Zimmet
In loving memory of Jan Graham
Zimmet, devoted wife of Ron Zimmet
and mother of Arthur, Ron, and Amy
Mae Zimmet Osborne. Larry and Jane
Graham, Austin, TX
Please accept this in memory of Jan
Zimmet. From Jill and Peyton Quarles,
South Daytona, FL
For offering support back in the days
when there was none to be had. From
Sharon Atack, Flagler Beach, FL
With our deepest sympathy for
your loss. From Don and Joy Hevey,
Tallahassee, FL
It is an honor to contribute to the
League in Jan Zimmet’s memory. Jan
was truly a champion of both mothers’
and childrens’ health. May she rest in
peace.
From Randy and Nancy Croy,
Daytona Beach,
Give the Giftof
The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding!
NEW 8th Edition
Help a new mother and baby get the
For significant events in the
life of someone you care
about, have you considered
a tribute gift
You can make a donation to La Leche
League International (LLLI) in the name
of a family member or friend to Honor
or Remember them. Your tax-deductible
donation will show that you care about
them while also helping LLLI further its
mission to help mothers breastfeed.
For a minimum gift of $25, the
Development Department will notify
the specified individual(s) with a
personalized card indicating that
you have made a gift in their name.
The gift amount will not be indicated.
Please include the complete name and
address of the person or persons
to be notified.
Because of space constraints, only
gifts of $50 or more will be published
in New Beginnings detailing your
special message of congratulations,
encouragement, or condolences; limit
tributes to 20 words. Please keep in
mind that LLLI is a diverse community
whose main focus is helping mothers
to breastfeed. While we can respect
personal beliefs reflected here because
of the nature of tributes, this column is
not intended for social commentaries
outside the focus of LLLI.
To submit a tribute gift, visit www.llli.org/
donate or write to: La Leche League
International, Attn: Development Department,
957 N. Plum Grove Road, Schaumburg, IL
60173 USA.
best start together by giving the gift of
The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding today!
Click Here
to learn more!
32 New Beginnings | Issue 2 | 2010

Toddler Tips
Crying
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2010 | Issue 2 | New Beginnings XXXIII