HEiST! - CrimethInc

STEAL FROM WORK FOR EDUCATION
The high school decided that to save costs, all
teachers had to provide their own lined and
graph paper for their students. Use of the copy
machine is free, however. A single page of graph
paper and a double-sided printer equals about
500 pages of paper for the math department.
Sometimes making the teacher’s job easier at
the cost of the administration is a genuinely
philanthropic act.
Small-Town Educator
STEAL FROM WORK FOR A SELF-ASSIGNED
BONUS
Being a buser is often the one of the lowest
rungs in a restaurant hierarchy (besides dishwashers).
At one job, this meant picking up
slack for the waitresses and kitchen throughout
closing duties if you were to get out of the place
before 11:00, even if you were a minor. Among
other tasks, you had to bring a large mesh bag
full of linen napkins and liquor stock up from
the basement. The napkins were taken to a container
right next to the dumpster (a wonderful
source of fine, free fabric!) and the liquor was
normally taken to the bar.
Slowdowns in the customer flow provided a
great time to plot ways to unite these two tasks.
Naturally, there was a camera in the liquor
closet, but a bag full of napkins is a great way
to get from the blind spots past the camera and
out of the room. Then you would put the napkins
in the container outside, along with whatever
else you might want to. Later, after you
punched out, no consumers who happened
to be in the parking lot thought twice about
someone in restaurant uniform going through
the napkin bin. Even big bottles of cheap wine
aged finely through that process. Self-assigned
bonuses taste best!
Ghrey Mann
In
Search
of the
Great
Homer
a position which allows them to make homers.
The government journals portray workers
who make homers as thieves. Similarly, the factory
bosses “fight” against homers. Warnings
and sanctions rain down on the heads of those
who misappropriate materials, use machines
for their own purposes, or tap the factory’s supply
of electricity. If the factory guard finds a
homer in our pockets or on our bodies, he has
caught a thief.
But even if the journals don’t acknowledge
it, both workers and bosses know very well that
this is just words. The real damage to the factory
is the time lost in making an object – time
which cannot be utilized by the factory. “If the
foreman knows you’re making homers, he’ll
send one of us to fetch some glue and he’ll