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appointment in my daily grind, but I am super psyched about how
good it makes me feel, so I do. Seriously, if I described the first
experience where she literally pulled me (Well, my energy) back
“into” my body - you’d all write me off as a whacko, for sure. Let
me just tease you with the fact that I had no clue what she was
doing. Her hands never touched me. She just used the energy
within her own hands and hovered them under my feet, when all
of a sudden I felt that feeling we’ve all experienced when driving
your car over a high bump/hill too fast – and your stomach goes
“whooooop” at the unexpected sensation of losing your lunch. Just
then, I sat up and said, “Oh my Gosh, did you just pull my feet,
pull something, move me” I knew she didn’t, but I was so
shocked I actually felt something; I just had to ask! Her reply was
a quiet smile along with, “No, Jami, I have not touched you, as
you know. I had to pull your energy that was hovering above you,
back ‘into’ your shell. Back into, you.”
Let me explain. Luisa is the proud founder of “THE INNER
CONTESSA.” She’s a certified energy worker/natural healer and
she’s actually helping me move past my emotional blockages. I
can’t help but wonder if I was born with these darned ‘things’, or
if they are acquired through life’s ups and downs. You know, I’m
in demolition mode with life’s road blocks, and I have a feeling
many of you can relate. For the first time, in a long time, I’m
uncovering a certain visceral clarity that lets me live life as a
whole, complete being again, rather than a discombobulated
creature, sort of fragmented and all over the place, just tryin’
to get through Friday. Sort of explains that high-energy, balls-inthe-air
way about me. Who would’a thought
Luisa gingerly pointed out that because my life (during the past
few years in particular) has been so, um…choppy, so erratic and
all-consuming, I have, by default, elected to mentally vacate my
own body. “It all starts from a root” though, Luisa reminded me,
many moons ago. I can’t blame issues of recent times totally; it’s
an accumulation of sorts. After spending some time with me, she
discovered that it actually started when I was about five years old.
She could see I had “moved around a lot as a child” (which is
totally accurate, and no I did not tell her anything about me at this
point.) “You didn’t, and still don’t, know where you belong!”
Hmm, interesting. According to Luisa, perhaps this is the start of
what has been a long, sometimes amazing and sometimes almost
unbelievable, rocky road.
So back to that “energy hovering around above my body” stuff for
a sec. I essentially “checked out” to some degree, to enable me to
deal with all the emotional garbage I had subconsciously decided I
couldn’t handle anymore. I (my inner energy, my being) was living
a life outside my physical structure, outside my own intuition
and beliefs, outside my spirituality. Essentially, I was having an
out-of-body experience because my mind, body and soul were not
on the same plane. She said I was living in my “spiritual plane,
which hovers above my head, because that is where I find trust
and comfort. I have too much “pain” that has caused me to flee
my own living physical self/shell. I found a safe haven in this
place – and I don’t seem to want to come back inside of this hard
earned, somewhat physically fit “shell” I have worked so hard to
keep strong! Sigh. What on earth was I doing vacating the very
thing that keeps me alive—my body!
People look at me and probably think something like, “Boy, she’s
really got this workout thing licked.” I only say this because I hear
it from all kinds of folks having simple conversations with me,
often asking what I do to keep fit. I have to remind myself it
would be inappropriate to shout, “NO, no really, don’t give me so
much credit, my parents deserve the credit for decent DNA. I am a
ping pong match with fitness just like the rest of America!” But I
remember to smile and instead graciously say, “Thank-you for
noticing, this is what I do.” I admit to feeling embarrassed that
someone is seeing something that I am not feeling about myself. I
question my own genuine nature. For the most part, I am trying
hard to keep up good habits and be good to my body. I plan on living
in it for a long time, no matter if Luisa says I prefer to be “out
hovering above it” or not. I know she is right, that I am choosing
to do that, but I am trying to convince myself that I’m not. I
wouldn’t. I couldn’t.
It’s never been more obvious to me that I need to balance
being tone, with peace of mind. I need to connect my inner
bicep with my inner chi.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
I know what you’re thinking. Jami has gone off the deep end big
time. But those who know me well understand that I’ll try just
about anything once, especially if it’s a stop on potential journey
to my ultimate happy place. Healers get a bad rap.
They’re actually not charlatans or quacks, but real people, passionate
about balance and living a whole life. Basically, they just want
to help others find comfort. That’s the most simplistic way to put
it.
When I walked into Luisa's natural healing studio, I didn’t know
what to expect at all. Everything looked normal. Phew. I’ve
always had a fear of the unknown (I guess we all do). But honestly,
I wasn’t sure if we were going to do voo-doo or mu-shoo and I
had to go poo poo. Were we going to burn incense and chant
Were we going to hold down dog for forty minutes Were we
going to play the flute Drink detox tea and pray What Was she
going to hypnotize me Make me look at crystals Would I have
to take a strange purification bath Perform rituals and customs
from a strange underground third world country Would we hold
hands, bang drums Would I have to eat nasty herbs or take a
strong, non-FDA approved herbal tincture under my tongue
Would she try to break me down Would I cry in front of a complete
stranger Was all this just hocus-pocus or legit panacea
To make matters worse, I had no clue what I was feeling on the
inside, let alone what I was going to be feeling once our hour session
headed towards its final act. I was vulnerable and miles away
from my comfort zone. Was my life going to drastically change
Or, what if nothing happened all Was I even capable of being
March/April I 215-396-0268 I www.phillyfitmagazine.com PhillyFIT I 9