Problem Gambling - A Guide for Families (PDF) - ProblemGambling.ca

Problem Gambling: A Guide for Families
A counsellor
can help you
support the
person with
a gambling
problem, and
help you restore
a healthy
balance within
the family.
* Adapted from
Makarchuk, K. &
Hodgins, D. (1998).
Helping Yourself: A
Self-help Manual for
Concerned Significant
Others and Problem
Gamblers. Calgary:
Addictive Behaviours
Laboratory,
University of Calgary;
and Prochaska, J.,
Norcross, J. &
Diclemente, C.
(1994). Changing for
Good. New York:
William Morrow.
how families can help the person change
Each family is different and has its own ideas of what will help
the person change. Here are some ideas that have helped many
families. They can help you support the person with a gambling
problem, and help you restore a healthy balance within
the family. With the help of a counsellor, you can learn to:
• understand the stages of change and work with them
• tell the person how his or her gambling affects you and the
family (But remember, yelling has probably not helped in the
past, so talk to the person when you are not angry. It is important
to stay calm when you talk.)
• do not make excuses for the person, and do not protect the
person from his or her own actions
• take proper care of yourself and get your life back in balance
• get your finances back in order
• restore trust
• get help.
The Stages of Change*
People with addiction problems, such as gambling, go through
similar stages when accepting the need to change and when
making changes. A person who gambles excessively may move
back and forth between stages before committing to making
changes. You can have an influence on the person’s decision if
you match your support to the stage of change that the person
is in. (This can be difficult and may take some practice. Many
people find that they need the support of a counsellor.)
stage 1: pre-contemplative: the person
is not interested in changing
At first, the person may not believe that they have a problem or
do not want to make any changes. When confronted the person
may deny or explain away their gambling behaviour. They
may think that the problem is a lack of money or even blame
others for their situation. Often, they do not want to see a counsellors
because they do not think that their gambling is a problem.
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