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BEHIND THESTEERING WHEEL<br />
By Jeffrey B. Aronson<br />
The QE I, my ’66 Series IIA 88” SW, never felt<br />
smoo<strong>the</strong>r or quieter. No wonder I was so<br />
pleased with <strong>the</strong> tune-up I gave <strong>the</strong> car.<br />
Admittedly, this moment occurred while <strong>the</strong><br />
Rover s<strong>to</strong>od stationary on <strong>the</strong> deck of <strong>the</strong><br />
ferry, in calm seas. Still, <strong>the</strong> quietude gave me<br />
<strong>the</strong> time <strong>to</strong> ponder my Land Rover world.<br />
“As Maine goes, so goes <strong>the</strong> nation,” is a<br />
political myth that we trumpet every election<br />
season. Right now, gas at my island <strong>to</strong>wn’s<br />
one pump, courtesy of <strong>the</strong> local fishermen’s<br />
co-op, costs a breathtaking $4.27 a gallon.<br />
The rest of <strong>the</strong> nation seems <strong>to</strong> be in a<br />
lockstep <strong>to</strong> keep up with us, although I<br />
believe that California might be ahead at this<br />
time. By 1966 standards, my IIA produced<br />
excellent gas mileage at 18 mpg; it’s still pretty<br />
good for a 4-wheel drive vehicle <strong>to</strong>day. That<br />
doesn’t make it cheap, though. Trips I knew I<br />
could make as long as I had a $20 bill in my<br />
pocket now require a $50 bill instead. Ask me<br />
whose face is on a $50 bill – I have no idea,<br />
I don’t see enough of <strong>the</strong>m <strong>to</strong> remember.<br />
Those tricks for incrementally better<br />
mileage that you always read about in <strong>the</strong><br />
British Land Rover magazines suddenly don’t<br />
seem so ridiculous. Whereas I once prided<br />
myself in cruising our one interstate at <strong>the</strong><br />
speed limit, that seems less important now. At<br />
a s<strong>to</strong>plight, people behind me should now<br />
plan on it taking a little longer for <strong>the</strong> line<br />
<strong>to</strong> get up <strong>to</strong> speed; I’m not accelerating any<br />
faster. “Full throttle” will be reserved<br />
for emergencies only. When performed in<br />
nice wea<strong>the</strong>r, tune-ups are actually fun<br />
<strong>to</strong> complete.<br />
Whe<strong>the</strong>r you own a Series Land Rover, a<br />
Range Rover Classic or P-38A, or a Discovery<br />
I or II, it’s likely paid for or will soon be off<br />
payments. This is a great thing right now as<br />
au<strong>to</strong> loan foreclosures are increasing. Buyers<br />
seduced by <strong>the</strong> new car smell and idolatry<br />
find <strong>the</strong>mselves behind <strong>the</strong> 8-ball when <strong>the</strong>y<br />
want <strong>to</strong> unload <strong>the</strong>ir cars; <strong>to</strong>o often, <strong>the</strong>y owe<br />
more in payments than <strong>the</strong> sale or trade in<br />
value of <strong>the</strong> car. We won’t even wonder how<br />
you are supposed <strong>to</strong> repair or maintain a new<br />
car that requires computer diagnostics when<br />
your <strong>to</strong>ol box consists of a socket set and a<br />
screwdriver. Anyone seen <strong>the</strong> hourly rate at a<br />
dealership recently?<br />
In 6th grade, our teacher administered<br />
an aptitude test that would help determine<br />
our academic life and likely career choices.<br />
He reviewed <strong>the</strong> results with each of us; when<br />
it came <strong>to</strong> my turn, he said, “Jeffrey, I don’t<br />
even know how you can turn a doorknob.”<br />
You know those unfolded boxes that evaluate<br />
spatial relationships? Well, I could never<br />
guess which folded-up one was <strong>the</strong> correct<br />
answer. He advised me, strongly, never <strong>to</strong> rely<br />
on my mechanical abilities – I would develop<br />
none.<br />
Some of my repair and maintenance<br />
experiences would verify <strong>the</strong> results of this<br />
6th grade test but for <strong>the</strong> most part, I’ve<br />
overcome this shortcoming with a lot of<br />
practice, a lot of assistance and a great deal of<br />
humor and patience. I am fully aware that if I<br />
can maintain a Land Rover, anyone can. Buy<br />
your Land Rover once and you can keep it for<br />
a long, long time.<br />
Regardless of <strong>the</strong> increasing costs, I’ll<br />
continue <strong>to</strong> use and enjoy my Land Rovers.<br />
I need <strong>the</strong>m for work and every trip, although<br />
shorter than before, will be a delight<br />
precisely because I’m in <strong>the</strong> Rover. The<br />
sounds, smells and tactile experiences<br />
received at <strong>the</strong> helm of a Land Rover still<br />
bring me - and every Rover enthusiast -<br />
enormous pleasure.<br />
_______ ________<br />
Here’s an au<strong>to</strong> etiquette report. Traveling<br />
about 120 miles <strong>to</strong> lead a program at a rural<br />
library I passed a Range Rover Classic coming<br />
<strong>the</strong> o<strong>the</strong>r way. I flashed my headlights and he<br />
responded <strong>the</strong> same. Later, I saw an LR 3<br />
coming at me. I waved out <strong>the</strong> window and<br />
<strong>the</strong> owner returned <strong>the</strong> wave. The manners of<br />
<strong>the</strong> marque are still strong.<br />
_______ ________<br />
The New York Times noted that members of<br />
US House of Representatives can get taxpayers<br />
<strong>to</strong> purchase, lease and operate a car for <strong>the</strong>m<br />
– and it’s legal. Judging from <strong>the</strong> lease<br />
payment amounts listed in <strong>the</strong> article,<br />
apparently <strong>the</strong>re’s no cap on how big a lease<br />
you can take out. “Buy American” doesn’t<br />
seem <strong>to</strong> apply, ei<strong>the</strong>r, although it’s<br />
undoubtedly politically expedient.<br />
If you’re a Land Rover enthusiast who<br />
would like a new Land Rover, this might be a<br />
great time <strong>to</strong> consider a bid for a seat in <strong>the</strong><br />
House of Representatives in your state. Sure,<br />
you have <strong>to</strong> spend time in Washing<strong>to</strong>n, DC,<br />
but <strong>the</strong>re are a lot of Land Rover enthusiasts<br />
<strong>to</strong> help you break <strong>the</strong> tedium of hearings on<br />
arcane legislation. Why attend staged events<br />
with people who don’t really like you when<br />
you can join <strong>the</strong> fascinating people who are<br />
Land Rover enthusiasts for a convivial<br />
evening?<br />
It might be a bit late <strong>to</strong> launch a bid for<br />
2008 but talk <strong>to</strong> your local Land Rover dealer<br />
now in anticipation of <strong>the</strong> 2010 and 2012<br />
elections. Line up <strong>the</strong> Rover you want now; we<br />
can’t wait <strong>to</strong> pay for <strong>the</strong> perk!<br />
_______ ________<br />
Perhaps <strong>the</strong> Royal Family receives copies of<br />
The Rovers North News and saw pho<strong>to</strong>s of my<br />
o<strong>the</strong>r ’66 IIA, <strong>the</strong> QM I, in <strong>the</strong> magazine; it<br />
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