[Mantak_Chia,_Michael_Winn]_Taoist_Secrets_of_Love(BookFi.org)

The Seven Spiritual Stages 175
Fourth Stage: EXCHANGE ENERGY WITHOUT HAVING
SEXUAL INTERCOURSE. For the male this practice is easier with
a youthful female partner who has not borne children and still has
great vitality, or with any woman who has cultivated her chi to
powerful levels through meditation. It is a method of self-healing
that can be used by young people, but is more likely to be employed
by older people who have less interest in an active sex life
yet seek the rejuvenating powers of sexual energy. The most famous
practitioner of this level is undoubtedly Mahatma Gandhi,
who insisted his 18 year-old niece sleep chastely beside him at
night. The spiritual fires burning brightly within Gandhi needed the
nourishing and cooling balance of a female's ching, yet cultural and
religious standards forbade sexual contact as a Hindu holy man.
During the Middle Ages the knights sworn to the code of
chivalry were under similar pressure to sublimate their sexual drive
into a kind of sublime spiritual romance. A chaste kiss from a
damsel or a nonsexual embrace with loving eye contact were idealized
in legends such as the Holy Grail myth (a clear symbol of the
quest for pure female energy within each male knight) and in the
songs of troubadors.
Today the practice is useful in situations where two friends
wish to deepen their spiritual contact or heal each other, but because
of marriage ties or other competing relationships do not want
the disharmony that might arise from a sexual affair. Taoist philosophy
has high respect for the stability of harmonious relationships,
but it also recognizes the need for the spiritual freedom
to balance and nourish one's personal elements. This method allows
a greater range of freedom in relationships beyond the limiting
categories of lover/not-lover, and encourages the blossoming of
spiritual friendships in which the exchange of sexually polarized
energy is acknowledged gracefully and without shame. It is a delicate
and wonderful way for two people to cultivate their energy
together. Married couples may find it another way to deepen the
sharing of their love.
This level can only be practiced by a man who has already
mastered the first three stages and has attained a certain level of
spiritual self knowledge. He has learned that what he's seeking is
not to be found in the external woman, in her sensuality. His chi is
moving not outward to his senses but inward to his center. He
seeks the inner woman within himself and finds it easier to tap his