[Mantak_Chia,_Michael_Winn]_Taoist_Secrets_of_Love(BookFi.org)

100 Taoist Secrets Of Love
he learns to discipline his forces. Untutored man's nature is to
attack: he possesses the offensive weapon. Woman's is to defend:
she protects without exhausting herself. When man assaults
furiously and discharges the sperm, he crumbles. Yet the woman
may remain most eager to continue, even if she kindly denies it and
thus "spares" her opponent.
To pursue the martial metaphor of the Chinese. . . . The
woman's shield and short sword is her vagina and clitoris. Man is
armed with a long spear alone, his penis. If man attacks too violently
with his love weapon, woman easily fends off his thrusts and
does him in when he exhausts his seed. But if man remains beyond
woman's striking range, she drops the shield from fatigue. The
contest will be over before man has lost his vehicle of higher vitality.
The point is this: Man must stop throwing away his sexual
energies. When he stops the sperm loss, woman is no longer in a
position of superiority. She meets her match and no longer suffers
disappointment. Man doesn't exhaust himself and retreat in humiliation,
yet feels he has met a good match. Woman reaches the limits
of her erotic capacities and is ready to make real peace with her
opponent.
The sages thus advise you to use your tactical weapons first.
Hold the strategic one in reserve. In other words, use the finger,
tongue and other parts of the body before using the penis. Through
tender and skillful use of your other limbs in foreplay, you may
bring your partner to a state of very high receptivity as the first step
in gaining equality with a superior opponent.
Her breasts will rise, respiration and glandular secretion will
increase. You should wait till fluid rolls to the vaginal lips before
using your chief arm. Give your lover time to fully enter the condition
of love before you enter her.
The battle between man and woman is over when both recognize
that neither can "win" by either dominating or submitting. At
that moment, both become free to surrender to each other and
exchange their deepest love—their vulnerabilities have been
matched and their fear of losing is neutralized.