The_Film_That_Changed_My_Life

254 Neil LaBute
Such a small portion of our life is dedicated to really physically expressing
ourselves, to really investing in a hug, to holding someone’s hand and thinking
about it while you’re doing it. It’s much easier just to have that distance
between someone and say, “I love you” or “I’ve been thinking about you” to
your child or to your wife or to your friend.
But rarely, and especially outside the immediate circle of your family,
do you physically show someone how you care for them. In Europe, you
see the tendency to kiss on the cheek. There’s the tendency for two men to
hug. I think in this country in particular, we’re still quite Puritanical about
the physical side of things. And I think it suggests sort of the beauty of that,
the beauty of the skin and that kind of longing for that physical element in
a relationship—and yet how little time we actually spend enjoying it when
it’s happening. So I think that’s a huge part of the title, at least in my translation
of it.
It’s interesting that you bring that up, because my next batch of questions
is about the role of language. One of the critics wrote that in this
film, language is used to hide emotion rather than to convey it, and all
the passions and tensions are portrayed visually.
LaBute: I think that’s true, but it’s not only seen with the spoken word. It’s
the written word as well. There’s this moment where he runs back into the
airport. He’s in a panic; he’s driven out to the airport and is kind of wild.
Even at that time in Paris, are you going to just drive out to the airport in
order to run into this person? And, of course, he does.
You know, love is that way. It’s sort of an insane proposition at times. But
he writes out that kind of desperate telegram to her, and he ends up slipping
it into his pocket when he sees her. Rather than giving it to her and saying,
“Hey, this is what I was thinking about you,” he destroys it; he throws it in a
wastebasket, embarrassed by this kind of display. Instead it’s just like, “Oh,
hey, gosh, I saw you, that’s so great; I thought you’d be on that other plane,”
when on that piece of paper in his hand is “I love you, you’ve changed my
life.” And his first impulse when she’s there is to toss it in. It’s a difficulty
that we have in person, that closeness, that place where you can actually feel
skin, the softness of it we’re very embarrassed by. What we’re embarrassed
by is opening up, being vulnerable.