Teen Challenge - Bishop O'Dowd High School

September 4, 2012

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Welcome and Prayer (Kevin Cushing)
Overview of the evening (Fran Warmerdam)
Senior Year timeline at O’Dowd (Kevin & Fran)
ü BOD expectations: opportunities and pitfalls
The Launch
ü Seniors and families you might know…
Panel with former and current BOD parents
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Wrap-Up and Take-Aways; Q&A

August
• 04: Senior Teen Challenge
September
• 11: College Fair
• 20: Graduation info to seniors
October
• 02: Seniors and Parents College Night
• 03: Senior Day at the A’s Game
• 04 – 05 – Senior Retreat
• 15: Senior=Parents Mass – be here by 1:30
• 17: No school for seniors: Campus visits
November
• Focus on school work
December
• 17 - 20: Finals !!

January
• 09: Financial Aid Night
• 17 - 18: Senior Retreat
February
• Focus on school work and family
March
• Focus on school work
• 27 – 31 Easter Break
April
• 01 - 07: Easter Break (campus visits)
• 26: No school for seniors
May
• 1: National Student Intent to Register deadline
• 17: Senior Ball
• 22: Senior class BBQ
• 23-24: Grad Night
• 28 - 31: Finals (!)

} Seniors and parents you might know….
◦ What’s this year really about?

Terence Smith—Mr. Social
• Thinks senior year should foreshadow the
‘fun’ of college
• Focuses exclusively on his friends
• Feels school rules don’t apply anymore
because he ‘knows’ all the adults
• Thinks independence equates recklessness
Why?
May be avoiding his fears and insecurities
about the future and his popularity at a new
place.

Maria Sandoval—Ms. I-am-sooo-on-top-of it
• Works incessantly on school work and college
applications
• Is enrolled in all Honors and AP classes
• Does not make time for senior activities
• Too tired to just ‘be’ with friends and family
• Equates acceptance into name college with
confirmation of her worth
Why?
Hyperfocus on doing everything right may cover up
sense of powerlessness over future.

Anna Martin—Ms. I-can’t-be-bothered
• Feels that she has outgrown high school
• Does not participate in senior year
activities
• May disengage from daily school work,
same age peers, and family
• Avoids specific future planning, including
college applications, gap year research etc.
Why?
May really be developmentally ready to be
done with high school, but is expected to
play the game.

Joey Yamada—Mr. The-future-is-waiting-for-me
• Focuses only on his one ‘talent’
• Misses significant amounts of school and most senior
year activities due to excessive outside time
commitments
• Has difficulty relating to peers on equal terms
• Does not engage in regular college process because
he ‘will be recruited’
Why?
May not have a holistic sense of self, rather only
knows himself capable in one area, may be avoiding
having to learn about his weaknesses and facing
rejection

Jamila Jones—Ms. I-got-this-senior-year-thing
• Takes a balanced set of classes
• Participates in senior activities that appeal to her
• Spends time with friends and family
• Stays on top of her school work
• Has a realistic sense of her strengths and limitations
and does not equate college acceptance with a
testament of her worth as a human being
Why?
Feels supported by the adults around because they
have a realistic and balanced sense of what’s
important.

Mrs. Susie I’ll-handle-this
• Sure her teen can’t do it without her.
• Takes control of the year: calls for schedule changes,
registers for senior activities, completes applications
• Never allows the teen to experience difficulty and
deal with the fall-out (i.e. problem-solve)
Why?
• Doesn’t trust her teen’s ability to follow through
(possibly based on experience)
• Afraid of the consequences if things go wrong

Mr. Dave This-is-your-thing
• Already picking out furniture for his new den (the
student’s current bedroom)
• Believes his teen should manage the ‘launch’ by himor
herself
• Does not encourage communication about the senior
year experience
• Does not participate in senior-parent events
• Stops parenting (especially rule setting) because he
“won’t be able to control her next year anyway”
Why?
• Is misunderstanding the recommended ‘letting go’ as
an abrupt cut-off
• Is forcing the issue now, so it won’t hurt later

Mrs. I’ll-do-senior-year-right-this-time-around
• Talks about her teen’s senior year: in the grocery
store, at the doctor’s office, in the school parking
lot…
• Wants her teen to attend her own alma mater
• Decides for the teen in which senior activities s/he
should participate because she did (or would have
liked to but couldn’t)
Why?
• Defines her own worth through her teen’s outward
successes

Mr. How-would-you-like-me-to-help?
• Offers help for the college process, but does not take
it over
• Maintains parent role, but allows for increasing
independence
• Keeps listening and talking to/with his teen
• Participates in senior-parent activities
Why?
• Recognizes and processes impending sense of loss as
a life stage and celebrates the new chapter in his
relationship with her teen

} Ask the experts…

} Final Q&A
} Good night and ‘Have a great senior year!’
P.S.: It will be one of these,
So:
Buckle up and enjoy the ride!