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Decatur, Texas, Wednesday, October 24, 2012 ALL AROUND WISE • A PART OF THE WISE COUNTY MESSENGER 5
Entertainment
Fans deduce that this
Cross is a Perry bad fit
There’s plenty of grumbling
about the latest casting
of brainy detective
“Alex Cross” from James
Patterson’s best-selling series.
While two of the tomes
have been made into movies
— “Kiss the Girls”
(1997) and “Along Came a
Spider” (2001) both starring
Morgan Freeman —
Patterson devotees will tell
you when they read the
books, they imagine Denzel
Washington.
Freeman was acceptable,
but this new incarnation
starring Tyler Perry
is highly frowned upon. Of
course, this isn’t the first
time in history that filmgoers
have bemoaned Hollywood’s
casting choices.
About the film
Perry, best known for his
cross-dressing role as Madea
in a series of successful
plays and movies, isn’t
being treated too well as
Cross. (Even though the
matinee attendees with
the Movie Man numbered
far more than he expected.)
It’s the biggest hubbub
since Tom Cruise was chosen
for the lead in “Interview
with the Vampire”
(1994, a 6); he proved them
wrong. Or maybe since
Tom Hanks got the professorial
lead in “The Da
Vinci Code” (2006, a 5). The
Movie Man had no problem
with either actor.
Cinema history is full of
casting decisions that have
made people scratch their
heads. Most agree that
there’s one colossal boo-boo
that stands above the others.
But, before that one,
here are a few others that
raised some eyebrows critically
and with the general
viewing public.
Denise Richards, who
as Woody Allen might
say, “can’t write her name
in the dirt with a stick,”
played a (barely clad) nuclear
scientist in the James
Bond movie “The World Is
not Enough” (1999, a 7).
Sophia Coppola would go
on to acclaim as directing,
but her distracting turn as
a Corleone in “Godfather:
Part III” (1990) is about all
everyone remembers from
the movie.
It was pretty tough to go
with Sylvester Stallone as
a country singer in “Rhinestone”
(1984); he’s such a
mumbler, he’d make a better
modern-day Bob Dylan.
In the superhero realm,
many thought Ben Affleck
was the wrong choice for
“Daredevil” (2003, a 5).
Could there be a weirder
match for Buddha than Keanu
Reeves? It happened in
1993’s “Little Buddha.” He
wasn’t the ideal Jonathan
the GOLD
STANDARD
in Classifieds
Every Weekend
and Midweek.
And only in
Harker in “Bram Stoker’s
Dracula” (1992) either.
“Breakfast at Tiffany’s”
(1961) is beloved by many
— not only Audrey Hepburn
fans — but Mickey
Rooney’s amped up stereotypical
mimicking of a Japanese
man is awful. Even
though it came out only
15 years after WWII when
society was still far from
being politically correct,
Rooney’s buck-teeth, round
glasses and ridiculous
speech patterns make all
of today’s viewers wince.
The all-time bad runner-up
must be Edgar G.
Robinson as a Hebrew in
the classic “The Ten Commandments”
(1956). The
mobster-ish delivery of,
“Where’s yer God now, Moses?”
is now enshrined in
cinematic history.
However, none of these
misfires can match the
casting in 1956 of “The
Conqueror” that had John
Wayne playing Genghis
Kahn. Nobody bought that
from the great cowboy.
The plot (big ol’ spoilers)
Detective Cross (Perry)
is also a doctor who is adept
in ratiocination (there,
the Movie Man gave you
a new word), aka logical
reasoning a la Sherlock
Holmes. Perry and his
childhood pal Tommy (Edward
Burns) work with
Burns’ secret lover Monica
(Rachel Nichols) as a team
that solves crimes in Detroit.
There’s a madman on
the loose, Picasso (Matthew
Fox). After two murders
that include gruesome
torture, the team deduces
that Fox is working up a
company’s hierarchy to
get to the No. 1 man, Leon
(Jean Reno).
Fox also knows that the
trio of do-gooders is on his
trail. He kills Nichols and
Perry’s wife. That makes
the cop buddies very angry.
Against the wishes of his
live-in mama (Cicely Tyson),
Perry heads out for
revenge. The taunting elusive
Fox appears to have
won until Perry and Burns
corner him. There’s quite
the battle, and Fox is finally
subdued.
But then comes the
hanging thread that keeps
bugging the good doctor/
detective. And when he figures
it out, he delivers a
substantial, if long range,
payback.
What works
The Movie Man isn’t a
Perry hater, and he’s not
horrible in this. Scenes he
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deduces are fun and believable.
His action skills…
not so much.
Fox makes an impression
as a crazy, bad guy; you
believe he could be so evil.
Starring: Tyler
Perry, Matthew
Fox, Edward
Burns
Directed by:
Rob Cohen
Rated PG-13:
for violence,
torture, sensuality,
language,
unintentional
laughs
SATURDAY
8:30 a.m. - 2 p.m.
on a scale of 1 to 10
It’s a long way from “Lost.”
Burns, while far distanced
from the potential
many thought he had back
in his indie debut, “The
Brothers McMullen” (which
he also directed and wrote),
is an amiable and appropriate
sidekick.
There’s a pretty tense
scene by director Rob Cohen
(best known for the original
“The Fast and the Furious”
back in 2001) where Fox
has his rifle sights trained
at a restaurant on both Perry
and his wife. It’s just a
decision to decide when to
pull the trigger.
Best scene
Fox has calmly finished
a hit, taken a cab back to
his car, and is leaving the
scene, apparently getting
away with his nefarious
deed. His invincibility and
elusiveness have been well
established. As he exits
the parking garage, out of
nowhere his vehicle is violently
T-boned by Perry and
Burns’ car. It’s loud and
sudden and fits the idea
that it takes something big
to stop Fox’s monster.
What doesn’t work
Fox’s acting is one of the
most over-the-top pieces in
recent history. He lost a ton
of weight, is bone thin with
gross, jutting veins popping
out all over his body. He
glares wide-eyed constantly,
and it’s hard to not laugh
sometimes.
There is no real feel between
the characters here.
Perry and Burns achieve a
little, but none of Perry’s
family impresses (which
makes his wife’s death not
that big a deal), and the
scenes with his daughter
after the funeral are Hallmark
TV stuff.
There’s a bunch of cornball
dialogue here. You’ll
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chuckle at it when you’re
not supposed to.
Watching the-not-exactly-svelte
Perry running
while brandishing a gun is
also unintentionally funny.
He’s just not a macho
man.
“Alex Cross” was produced
in part by author
Patterson so he must
be OK with some of it.
But the movie is dank
and dull; it’s anything
but a potential series.
A couple of scenes
seem to be added simply
to pad out the film
— Fox’s early mixed
martial arts fight that’s
apparently some sort of
sexy pick-up move (but
it’s ridiculous) and the
opening sequence where
the crime fighting trio
make a very goofy arrest.
The rating
This is a very hard PG-
13. There’s some graphic
torture, a scene of sensuality
that pushes it, and some
tough-guy bad language.
It’s rated right, but it’s
pretty rough.
Summing up
The Movie Man is not
as bummed as many with
“Alex Cross”; he hasn’t read
the books. But as a movie,
it’s flat and completely forgettable.
Expect to see Madea
before Dr. Cross again.
Next up
The weirdness that is
“Cloud Atlas.”
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Paradise AG Supporters
4th Annual Skeet Shoot!
SATURDAY, OCTOBER 27 • 9 A.M.
782 CR 3342 • PARADISE, TX
Proceeds will benefit Paradise FFA
Program, Projects & Scholarship Fund
• Family Event
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• Free Meal for all Shooters
• Drawings & Prizes
• Concession Stand
Call Terre Ward 940.210.0979, Brett Sharp 817.845.5897
Lonnie Holder 817.366.7356, Kim Wakefield 817.454.9081
for any information needed. Hope to see you there!