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<strong>OCT</strong> <strong>2006</strong><br />

1


CONTENTS<br />

<strong>OCT</strong> 06<br />

4-8 Halloween Section<br />

10 Boss’ Rules<br />

11 Husband/Wife Humor<br />

15 Night Tech: iPod has a<br />

new enemy in town<br />

20 Cover Model: Kristol<br />

22 Godot<br />

30 When Girls Drink Too<br />

Much<br />

31 Steeler Mania<br />

32 Featured Band:<br />

Evanescence<br />

37 Horoscopes<br />

Dining Feature - Coming Soon<br />

Again in Upcoming Issues<br />

Cover Photo C.E. Mitchell<br />

Cover Model Kristol<br />

Make Up/Hair Ronal<br />

Styling Ronal<br />

Publisher:<br />

Joyce Campisi<br />

Editor-in-Chief:<br />

Joyce Campisi<br />

Executive Editor:<br />

Joseph P. Campisi, III<br />

Art Director:<br />

Ronal Mitchell<br />

Director of Photographer:<br />

C. E. Mitchell<br />

Graphic Designer:<br />

Ronal Mitchell,<br />

Donnie Garber<br />

Sales Manager:<br />

John Palmer<br />

Feature Writers:<br />

Joseph P. Campisi, III<br />

Suz Pisano<br />

Joyce Campisi<br />

Kara<br />

Contributing Writers:<br />

Joseph P. Campisi, III,<br />

Suz Pisano<br />

Bill Mace<br />

Jean Mace<br />

Dottie Wilhelm<br />

Lori Hon<br />

Copyright © <strong>2006</strong>, SX publications, <strong>Nightwire</strong>. All rights reserved. SX Publications, <strong>Nightwire</strong> owns the copyrights of the photographs and contents of this publication.<br />

No part of this publication may be reproduced, modified, retransmitted or published in any part of copyrighted material without the expressed written permission<br />

of the publisher. The articles and editorials are meant for entertainment purposes only, and do not necessarily represent opinions of SX Publications, <strong>Nightwire</strong>,<br />

they are those of the writers and advertisers and may not necessarily represent those of SX Publications, <strong>Nightwire</strong>. SX Publications, <strong>Nightwire</strong> in no way offers any<br />

recommendations, endorsements or guarantees of any kind with regard to any service, product or person in any way for the actions ensuing from advertising. This<br />

publication contains elements adult in nature and may not be suitable for minors. Some of the products and services available through advertisements are not for<br />

purchase by minors. SX Publications, <strong>Nightwire</strong> cannot be held responsible for photos submitted by advertisers and photography supplied by advertisers or vendors<br />

without a release from the model(s). SX Publications, <strong>Nightwire</strong> will assume no liability for misprints, typos, ad print quality, ad placement or incorrect ad copy.<br />

<strong>OCT</strong> <strong>2006</strong><br />

3


10 Top Reasons Why<br />

Halloween is Better than<br />

10. You are guaranteed to get at least a little something in the sack.<br />

9. If you get tired, wait ten minutes and go back at it again.<br />

8. The stranger you look, the easier it is to get some.<br />

7. You don’t have to compliment the person who gave it to you.<br />

Sex<br />

Trick or Treat<br />

Jokes<br />

6. Person you are with doesn’t fantasize you’re someone else, you already are.<br />

5. If you get a stomach ache, it won’t last nine months.<br />

4. If you wear leather and chains, no one thinks you’re kinky.<br />

3. Doesn’t matter if kids hear you moaning and groaning.<br />

2. Less guilt the next morning from over-indulging.<br />

1. If you don’t get what you want at one place, you can always go next door to get more!<br />

Top Signs That You’re Too Old to Trick or<br />

Treat<br />

10. You get winded from knocking on the door.<br />

9. You have to have another kid chew the candy<br />

for you.<br />

8. You ask for high fiber candy only.<br />

7. When someone drops a candy bar in your bag,<br />

you lose balance and fall over.<br />

6. People say, “What a scary mask!”, but you’re not<br />

wearing a mask.<br />

5. When the door opens and you yell, “Trick or..... “,<br />

and you can’t remember the rest.<br />

4. By the end of the night, you have a bag full of re<br />

straining orders.<br />

3. You have to carefully choose a costume that<br />

won’t dislodge your hairpiece.<br />

2. You’re the only Spongebob Squarepants in the<br />

neighborhood with a walker.<br />

1. You avoid going to houses where your ex-wives<br />

live.<br />

Trick or Treating by Astrological Sign<br />

Aries pushes the others aside to get to the door first.<br />

Taurus will only eat the finest of Swiss chocolates.<br />

Gemini goes around the neighborhood once, changes costumes<br />

and goes around again.<br />

Cancer stays at home and gives candy to the other trick-ortreaters.<br />

Leo plans their costume for months, then won’t go out<br />

because someone else had the same idea.<br />

Virgo wears a neatly-pressed suit and tells everyone that<br />

they’re a bookkeeper.<br />

Libra is still standing in front of the closet trying to decide<br />

on a costume.<br />

Scorpio isn’t in it for the candy.<br />

Sagittarius will manage to wander to the next town.<br />

Capricorn makes a list of all the houses that give good<br />

candy and the optimal route to take.<br />

Aquarius builds their costume out of spare flashlights and<br />

spends all night tinkering when it shorts.<br />

Pisces skips the whole thing to compose poetry to the<br />

Moon.<br />

4 <strong>OCT</strong> <strong>2006</strong><br />

<strong>OCT</strong> <strong>2006</strong><br />

5


Halloween Humor<br />

A<br />

Little Johnny was on a park bench stuffing all of his Halloween candy<br />

in his mouth. An old lady came over and said. “Son, don’t you know<br />

that eating all of that candy will rot your teeth, give you acne, and<br />

make you sick?”<br />

“My grandfather lived to be 105 years old!” replied Johnny.<br />

“Did he eat five candy bars at a sitting?” the old lady retorted.<br />

“No, said Johnny, but he minded his own freakin’ business.”<br />

woman whose husband often came home<br />

drunk decided to cure him of the habit. One<br />

Halloween night, she put on a devil suit and<br />

hid behind a tree to intercept him on the<br />

way home.<br />

When her husband came by, she jumped out<br />

and stood before him with her red horns,<br />

long tail, and pitchfork.<br />

“Who are you?” he asked.<br />

“I’m the Devil,” she responded.<br />

“Well, come on home with me,” he said, “I<br />

married your sister.”<br />

6 <strong>OCT</strong> <strong>2006</strong><br />

Q: Where does Dracula<br />

water ski?<br />

A: On Lake Erie.<br />

Q: What do you call an<br />

empty hot dog?<br />

A: A hollow weenie.<br />

Q: Why don’t witches<br />

ever have babies?<br />

A: Warlocks have hollow<br />

weenies.<br />

Q: What happened to<br />

the guy who couldn’t<br />

keep up payments to<br />

his exorcist?<br />

A: He was repossessed.<br />

A couple was invited to a swanky masked Halloween party. She got a terrible headache and told her husband to go to the<br />

party alone. He, being a devoted husband, protested, but she argued and said she was going to take some aspirin and go<br />

to bed, and there was no need of his good time being spoiled by not going.So he took his costume and away he went. The<br />

wife, after sleeping soundly for one hour, awakened without pain, and as it was still early, she decided to go to the party. In<br />

as much as her husband did not know what her costume was, she thought she would have some fun by watching her husband<br />

to see how he acted when she was not with him. She joined the party and soon spotted her husband cavorting around on the<br />

dance floor, dancing with every nice chick he could and copping a little feel here and a little kiss there.<br />

His wife went up to him and being a rather seductive babe herself, he left his partner high and dry and devoted his time to<br />

the new stuff that had just arrived. She let him go as far as he wished naturally, since he was her husband. Finally he whispered<br />

a little proposition in her ear and she agreed, so off they went to one of the cars and had a little bang. Just before unmasking<br />

at midnight, she slipped away and went home and put the costume away and got into bed,wondering what explanation<br />

he would make for his behavior. She was sitting up reading when he came in and asked what kind of a time he had. He said,<br />

“Oh, the same old thing. You know I never have a good time when you’re not there.” Then she asked, “Did you dance<br />

much?” He replied, “I’ll tell you, I never even danced one dance. When I got there, I met Pete, Bill Brown and some other<br />

guys, so we went into the den and played poker all evening. But the guy I loaned my costume to sure had a great time!”<br />

<strong>OCT</strong> <strong>2006</strong><br />

7


Halloween<br />

Jokes<br />

Q: What type of dog does Dracula have?<br />

A: A blood hound.<br />

The IRS Trick or Treater<br />

The door bell, rings and a man answers it. Here stands<br />

this plain but well dressed kid, saying, “Trick or Treat!”<br />

The man asks the kids what he’s dressed up like for<br />

Halloween. The kid says, “I’m an IRS agent.” Then he<br />

takes 28% of the man’s candy, leaves, and doesn’t say<br />

“Thank you”.<br />

Rocky<br />

One Halloween a trick-or-treater came to my door dressed<br />

as “Rocky”, in boxing gloves and satin shorts. Soon after I<br />

gave him some goodies, he returned for more.<br />

“Aren’t you the same ‘Rocky’ who left my doorstep several<br />

minutes ago?” I asked.<br />

“Yes,” he replied, “but now I’m the sequel. I’ll be back three<br />

more times tonight, too.”<br />

Halloween Costume<br />

It’s Halloween and this woman has nothing to wear.<br />

She put a sheet over her and sticks horns on it and goes<br />

to work.<br />

A co-worker asks her what she is dressed as.<br />

She replies, “Bull Sheet”.<br />

Halloween Lingo<br />

Bobbing Apples:<br />

What happens when you jog without a bra.<br />

Boogieman:<br />

The guy who passes time at a stoplight picking his nose.<br />

Coffin:<br />

What you do when you get a piece of popcorn stuck in<br />

your throat.<br />

8 <strong>OCT</strong> <strong>2006</strong><br />

Carolina Ghost Story<br />

This happened about a month ago just outside a little<br />

town in the low Country of South Carolina, and while it<br />

sounds like an Alfred Hitchcock Tale - It’s real.<br />

This guy was on the side of the road hitchhiking on a<br />

real dark night in the middle of a thunder storm. Time<br />

passed slowly and no cars went by. It was raining so<br />

hard he could hardly see his hand in front of his face.<br />

Suddenly he saw a car moving slowly, approaching and<br />

appearing ghostlike in the rain. It slowly crept toward<br />

him and stopped. Wanting a ride real bad the guy<br />

jumped in the car and closed the door, only then did he<br />

realize that there was nobody behind the wheel. Then<br />

the car slowly started moving and<br />

the guy was terrified, too scared to think of jumping out<br />

and running.<br />

The guy saw that the car was slowly approaching a sharp<br />

curve, still too scared to jump out, he started to pray<br />

and begging for his life; he was sure the ghost car would<br />

go off the road and in the marsh and he would surely<br />

drown, when just before the curve, a hand appeared<br />

through the driver’s window and turned the steering<br />

wheel, guiding the car safely around the bend.<br />

Paralyzed with fear, the guy watched the hand reappear<br />

every time they reached a curve. Finally the guy, scared<br />

to near death, had all he could take and jumped out of<br />

the car and ran to town. Wet and in shock, he went into<br />

a bar and voice quavering, ordered two shots of whiskey,<br />

then told everybody about his supernatural experience.<br />

A silence enveloped and everybody got goose bumps when<br />

they realized the guy was telling the truth<br />

and not just some drunk.<br />

About half an hour later two guys walked into the bar<br />

and one says to the other: “Look Bubba, There’s that<br />

idiot who rode in our car when we was pushin it in the<br />

rain.”<br />

Frankenstein:<br />

Hot dog and a mug of beer.<br />

Full Moon:<br />

What your repairman reveals when he bends over to fix your<br />

fridge.<br />

Goblin:<br />

How you eat the snicker’s bar you got for Halloween.<br />

THE GOOD, THE BAD AND THE UGLY:<br />

Good : Your wife is pregnant.<br />

Bad : It’s triplets.<br />

Ugly : You had a vasectomy five years ago.<br />

Good : Your wife’s not talking to you<br />

Bad : She wants a divorce.<br />

Ugly : She’s a lawyer.<br />

Good : Your son is finally maturing.<br />

Bad : He’s involved with the women next door.<br />

Ugly : So are you.<br />

Good : Your son studies a lot in his room.<br />

Bad : You find several porn movies hidden there.<br />

Ugly : You’re in them.<br />

Good : Your hubby and you agree, no more kids.<br />

Bad : You can’t find your birth control pills.<br />

Ugly : Your daughter borrowed them.<br />

Good : Your husband understands fashion.<br />

Bad : He’s a cross-dresser.<br />

Ugly : He looks better than you.<br />

Good : You just gave “the birds and the bees”<br />

talk to your daughter.<br />

Bad : She keeps interrupting.<br />

Ugly : With corrections<br />

Good : Your son is dating someone new.<br />

Bad : It’s another man.<br />

Ugly : He’s your best friend.<br />

Good : Your daughter got a new job.<br />

Bad : As a hooker.<br />

Ugly : Your co-workers are her best clients.<br />

Way Ugly : She makes more money than you do.<br />

<strong>OCT</strong> <strong>2006</strong><br />

9


Subject: Boss’s Rules<br />

To: All Employees<br />

Effective immediately the following rules will be adhered too.<br />

1. If you can’t get your work done in the first 24 hours, work nights.<br />

2. A pat on the back is only a few centimeters from a kick in the butt.<br />

3. Don’t be irreplaceable, if you can’t be replaced, you can’t be promoted.<br />

4. It doesn’t matter what you do, it only matters what you say you’ve done and what<br />

you’re going to do.<br />

5. After any salary raise, you will have less money at the end of the month than you<br />

did before.<br />

6. The more crap you put up with, the more crap you are going to get.<br />

7. You can go anywhere you want if you look serious and carry a clipboard.<br />

8. Eat one live toad the first thing in the morning and nothing worse will happen to<br />

you the rest of the day.<br />

9. When the bosses talk about improving productivity, they are never talking about<br />

themselves.<br />

10. If at first you don’t succeed, try again. Then quit. No use being a damn fool about<br />

it!<br />

11. There will always be beer cans rolling on the floor of your car when the boss asks<br />

for a ride home from the office.<br />

12. Keep your boss’s boss off your boss’s back.<br />

13. Everything can be filed under “miscellaneous.”<br />

14. Never delay the ending of a meeting or the beginning of a cocktail hour.<br />

15. To err is human, to forgive is not our policy.<br />

16. Anyone can do any amount of work provided it isn’t the work he/she is supposed<br />

to be doing.<br />

17. Important letters that contain no errors will develop errors in the mail.<br />

18. If you are good, you will be assigned all the work. If you are really good, you will<br />

get out of it.<br />

19. You are always doing something marginal when the boss drops by your desk.<br />

20. People who go to conferences are the ones who shouldn’t.<br />

21. If it wasn’t for the last minute, nothing would get done.<br />

22. At work, the authority of a person is inversely proportional to the number of pens<br />

that person is carrying.<br />

23. When you don’t know what to do, walk fast and look<br />

worried.<br />

24. Following the rules will not get the job done and get<br />

ting the job done is no excuse for not following the<br />

rules.<br />

25. When confronted by a difficult problem you can solve<br />

it more easily by reducing it to the question, “How<br />

would the Lone Ranger handle this?”<br />

26. No matter how much you do, you never do enough.<br />

27. The last person that quit or was fired will be held<br />

responsible for everything that goes wrong.<br />

Signed:<br />

The Management<br />

Husband and Wife Humor<br />

Wife vs. Husband Words Creation<br />

A couple drove down a<br />

country road for several<br />

miles, not saying a word.<br />

An earlier discussion had<br />

led to an argument and<br />

neither of them wanted to<br />

concede their position. As<br />

they passed a barnyard of<br />

mules, goats, and pigs, the<br />

husband asked sarcastically,<br />

“Relatives of yours?”<br />

“Yep,” the wife replied, “inlaws.”<br />

Who Does What<br />

A husband read an article<br />

to his wife about how many<br />

words women use a day...<br />

30,000 to a man’s 15,000.<br />

The wife replied, “The<br />

reason has to be because we<br />

have to repeat everything to<br />

men...<br />

The husband turned to his<br />

wife and asked, “What?”<br />

A man and his wife were having an argument about who should brew<br />

the coffee each morning.<br />

The wife said, “You should do it, because you get up first, and then<br />

we don’t have to wait as long to get our coffee.”<br />

The husband said, “ You are in charge of cooking around here and you<br />

should do it, because that is your job, and I can just wait for my<br />

coffee.”<br />

Wife replies, “No, you should do it, and besides, it is in the Bible that<br />

the man should do the coffee.”<br />

Husband replies, “I can’t believe that, show me.”<br />

So she fetched the Bible, and opened the New Testament<br />

and showed him at the top of several pages, that it indeed says...<br />

“HEBREWS”<br />

The Silent Treatment<br />

A man said to his wife one day, “I<br />

don’t know how you can be<br />

so stupid and so beautiful all at the<br />

same time.<br />

“ The wife responded, “Allow me to<br />

explain.<br />

God made me beautiful so you would<br />

be attracted to me;<br />

God made me stupid so I would be<br />

attracted to you.<br />

A man and his wife were having some problems at home and were<br />

giving each other the silent treatment. Suddenly, the man realized that<br />

the next day, he would need his wife to wake him at 5:00 AM for an<br />

early morning business flight. Not wanting to be the first to break the<br />

silence (and LOSE), he wrote on a piece of paper, “Please wake me at<br />

5:00 AM.” He left it where he knew she would find it. The next morning,<br />

the man woke up, only to discover it was 9:00 AM and he had<br />

missed his flight. Furious, he was about to go and see why his wife<br />

hadn’t wakened him, when he noticed a piece of paper by the bed.<br />

The paper said, “It is 5:00 AM. Wake up.”(Men are not equipped for<br />

these kinds of contests.) God may have created man before woman,<br />

but there is always a rough draft before the masterpiece.<br />

10 <strong>OCT</strong> <strong>2006</strong><br />

<strong>OCT</strong> <strong>2006</strong><br />

11


Phantom Fright Nights<br />

return to Kennywood<br />

amusement park for <strong>2006</strong>!<br />

Each Autumn, after the Kennywood gates close for the winter, a<br />

ghastly force takes over. And each autumn, we try to convince others<br />

of the phenomenon, but no one believes us.<br />

So this year - if you have the nerve... and ONLY if you have the<br />

nerve - we hope we’ll take a look around to see for yourself... and then<br />

tell your friends, neighbors, families, everyone. The public has the<br />

right to know!<br />

West Mifflin, PA - Individuals<br />

in search of the preeminent haunted<br />

amusement park must travel<br />

along a long distance to find one<br />

as chilling as Kennywood’s Phantom<br />

Fright Nights! According<br />

to Amusement Today, a highly<br />

respected international amusement<br />

industry newspaper, Kennywood<br />

offers the 3rd Best Halloween<br />

Event in the world! (To check out<br />

the other parks in the top three,<br />

one must travel to California or<br />

Florida). A visit to Phantom Fright<br />

Nights at Kennywood in Western<br />

Pennsylvania shows the most skeptical<br />

guest why!<br />

The first clue of transformation<br />

begins as one approaches the<br />

parking lot. Vanished are happy<br />

lights and music. Appearing is fog,<br />

creepy music, and eerie figures...<br />

and the Phantom himself guards<br />

the front gate. Once safely through<br />

the creepier-than-ever tunnel,<br />

visitors may notice an old hearse<br />

where the carnival-like cotton<br />

candy cart usually stands.<br />

Traveling down the fog -filled midway,<br />

guests are soon seduced into<br />

the Villa of the Vampires, where even<br />

non-Dracula fans will appreciate<br />

Renfield and his bugs, bat caves,<br />

the Master’s lair, and much more.<br />

Further down the midway, pirates<br />

are the inhabitants in an all new<br />

haunted attraction: Captain Skully’s<br />

Curse in 3D!<br />

The Kennywood’s Team<br />

Members’ jobs, too, take on a<br />

different look at Phantom Fright<br />

Nights. Joe Barron, Kennywood<br />

Human Resources Director, comments,<br />

“After working the summer<br />

on games, rides, food, etc., many<br />

Team Members have new opportunities<br />

for Phantom Fright Nights.<br />

We now look for ghosts, ghouls,<br />

goblins and gremlins with special<br />

frightening fearsonalities!<br />

Kennyood is a entirely different<br />

experience during Phantom Fright<br />

Nights, for guests and employees<br />

alike!”<br />

12 <strong>OCT</strong> <strong>2006</strong><br />

Phantom Fright Nights take place every Friday and Saturday night from<br />

September 29 through October 28 from 7 PM to 1 AM, plus two bonus nights: Saturday,<br />

September 23 and Sunday, October 8 from 7 PM to 11 PM. Tickets are $19.50 at the<br />

gate. (Tickets may be purchased for $16.50 at participating Giant Eagle locations.)<br />

No food or beverages may be brought into the park during Fright Nights. Halloween masks,<br />

make-up, or costumes are not permitted. Phantom Fright Nights is not recommended for children<br />

under 13 years of age. For further information, call 412.461.0500 or visit<br />

www.phantomfrightnights.com.<br />

<strong>OCT</strong> <strong>2006</strong><br />

13


ELDERLY SEX:<br />

An elderly couple, who were both widowed, had been<br />

going out with each other for a long time. Urged on<br />

by their friends, they decided it was finally time to get<br />

married.<br />

Before the wedding, they went out to dinner and had<br />

a long conversation regarding how their marriage might<br />

work. They discussed finances, living arrangements and<br />

so on.<br />

Finally, the old gentleman decided it was time to broach<br />

the subject of their physical relationship. “How do you<br />

feel about sex?” he asked, rather trustingly.<br />

“Well,” she said, responding very carefully, “I’d have to<br />

say, I would like it infrequently.”<br />

The old gentleman sat quietly for a moment, then, looking<br />

over his glasses, he casually asked,...... “Is that one<br />

word or two?”<br />

<br />

The iPod has a new enemy in town, with a possible release date of Nov. 14 and a<br />

$299 price tag. The Microsoft Zune opens a new market of “social” music<br />

connectivity.<br />

WMA, MP3, AAC, JPEG,WMV, MPEG-4, H.264 media<br />

Wi-Fi (802.11 b/g) connectivity<br />

30 GB Hard Drive<br />

3 inch video LCD 320x240<br />

White, Black, and Chocolate Colors<br />

FM Radio<br />

TV output connectivity<br />

Dedicated song download site<br />

DJ Mode (broadcast what you are listening to)<br />

Podcast playback<br />

3 day playback of Wi-Fi transfered songs from friends<br />

XBOX streaming<br />

XBOX (Microsoft) points compatability<br />

Preloaded music videos<br />

Over a dozen accessories at launch<br />

5.6 ounces in weight, 4.4 by 2.4 by 0.58 inches size<br />

Metric: 158 g, 112 by 61 by 14.7 mm size<br />

From whole beans to brewed coffee without the guesswork or mess, this 10-cup<br />

programmable coffeemaker features a completely automatic, integrated mill-and-brew<br />

system. Simply add water and whole-bean coffee, select from seven grind selections<br />

or turn the grinder off to brew already ground coffee, then enjoy the freshest, most<br />

flavorful coffee imaginable. The unit’s brew-pause function allows for pouring a cup<br />

midbrew, and its clock display automatically springs forward, falls back, and resets<br />

after a power failure. Other highlights include a water reser voir with a large viewing<br />

window, high-quality stainless-steel grinding blades, a permanent stainless-steel filter<br />

basket, a warming plate with automatic shut off, and hidden cord storage.<br />

Not only does the coffeemaker brew great-tasting coffee, it also provides animated<br />

weather information on its large, bright-blue backlit LCD display. MSN Direct regionspecific<br />

up-to-the-minute weather information is transmitted via an FM signal within<br />

minutes of plugging in the coffeemaker--there’s no set-up, subscription, or Internet<br />

connection required. The appliance displays the current temperature and conditions,<br />

high and low temperatures, and chance of precipitation, as well as four-day weather<br />

forecasts. The coffeemaker also displays scrolling weather information; visibility; sunrise/sunset<br />

time; the UV index; and national weather-ser vice warnings and aler ts (the<br />

display flashes when a warning aler t is issued). In addition to its optional sleep function,<br />

where if the unit is idle for a period of time an animated, napping cat appears,<br />

the user interface can display a 12- or 24-hour clock; temperature in degrees F or C;<br />

along with English, French, or Spanish languages. The 10-cup programmable coffeemaker<br />

with animated coffee and weather information measures 8 by 11 by 14 inches<br />

and carries a one-year limited warranty.<br />

<br />

<br />

<strong>OCT</strong> <strong>2006</strong><br />

15<br />

14 <strong>OCT</strong> <strong>2006</strong>


The Pittsburgh Cultural Trust announces its<br />

spotlight event for fall of <strong>2006</strong>: The Gate<br />

Theatre’s productions of<br />

Waiting for Godot<br />

October 18-22, <strong>2006</strong> at the Byham Theater<br />

The Pittsburgh Cultural Trust announced its spotlight event of its <strong>2006</strong> fall<br />

Trust Presents series, The Gate Theatre’s production of Waiting for Godot<br />

on October 18-22, <strong>2006</strong>, at the Byham Theater. Waiting for Godot features<br />

Stephen Brennan (Lucky), Barry McGovern (Vladimir), Johnny Murphy<br />

(Estragon) and Alan Stanford (Pozzo). Single tickets ($15.50-50.50) are on<br />

sale at the Box Office at Theater Square, online at www.pgharts.org, and<br />

via phone at (412) 456-6666. For advanced group reservations and discount<br />

information, call (412) 471-6930.<br />

Samuel Beckett did not attend the first performance of Waiting for Godot in the tiny Théâtre de Babylone in Paris on January<br />

5, 1953. He need not have been nervous. Waiting for Godot went on to become what it remains today, a modern classic<br />

which changed the course of 20th century theatre. With this play Beckett was to join the select company of writers who<br />

have created characters who enter the popular imagination, even if Godot himself fails to make an appearance. This is, after<br />

all, the play in which, famously, “nothing happens twice.”<br />

This production of Waiting for Godot was first produced in 1988 at the request of Samuel Beckett himself. It was he who<br />

recommended that Walter Asmus, who had been his assistant director on the famous Schiller Theatre production, direct;<br />

and that Louis le Brocquy, the world-renowned Irish artist, design.<br />

The Gate Theatre was founded in 1928 and has since become internationally<br />

renowned as one of the most adventurous playhouses in Europe. Under the<br />

current artistic directorship of Michael Colgan, the Gate continues to produce<br />

and present high quality new and classic drama from Ireland and Europe,<br />

both at home and abroad. In 1991, the Gate became the first theatre<br />

in the world to present a full retrospective of all 19 of Samuel Beckett’s stage<br />

plays. The Beckett Festival was a unique tribute to Beckett and his remarkable<br />

work. The Festival met with international and critical acclaim when it<br />

toured to the Lincoln Center, New York in 1996 and the Barbican Centre,<br />

London in 1999. The Gate has toured Waiting for Godot to many other<br />

cities including San Francisco, Chicago, Melbourne, Toronto, Seville, Beijing<br />

and Shanghai.<br />

Irish playwright, critic and fiction writer Samuel Beckett (1906-1989) was<br />

one of the great literary pioneers of the 20th century. His bleak imaginary<br />

landscapes examined the incomprehensible reality of humanity through new<br />

dramatic and literary forms. Beckett tirelessly explored the human condition<br />

in his work and was awarded the Nobel Prize for literature in 1969. Waiting<br />

for Godot, probably his best-known work, was written in French in 1949.<br />

MANAGEMENT SECRETS:<br />

A new manager spends a week at his new office with<br />

the manager he is replacing. On the last day the departing<br />

manager tells him, “I have left three numbered<br />

envelopes in the desk drawer. Open an envelope if<br />

you encounter a crisis you can’t solve.”<br />

Three months down the track there is a major drama,<br />

everything goes wrong - the usual stuff - and the<br />

manager feels very threatened by it all. He remembers<br />

the parting words of his predecessor and opens the<br />

first envelope. The message inside says “Blame your<br />

predecessor!” He does this and gets off the hook.<br />

About half a year later, the company is experiencing a<br />

dip in sales, combined with serious product problems.<br />

The manager quickly opens the second envelope. The<br />

message read, “Reorganize!” This he does, and the<br />

company quickly rebounds.<br />

Three months later, at his next crisis, he opens the<br />

third envelope. The message inside says “Prepare<br />

three envelopes”.<br />

16 <strong>OCT</strong> <strong>2006</strong><br />

<strong>OCT</strong> <strong>2006</strong><br />

17


How Some Couples<br />

Never Losethe<br />

Magic<br />

Whenever people talk about “working on a relationship,”<br />

I know I’m in for a boring conversation about<br />

their earnest approach to relating. Why not try<br />

playing at a relationship for a change? In our Puritan<br />

society, everything is work. Marriage is work. Sex is<br />

work. Work is work. I think there’s a lot of room for<br />

play in life. You can have a good relationship without<br />

approaching it like<br />

the blueprint for a<br />

high-rise building.<br />

And you can certainly<br />

have better sex if you<br />

learn to lighten up.<br />

Adults have forgotten<br />

how to play.<br />

To keep the romance alive in a long-term relationship,<br />

you need the right attitudes. Without them, you’ll<br />

always be consulting a romantic calendar for the suggestion<br />

of the day. Romantic spontaneity is a product<br />

of attitudes. If your relationship needs a romantic<br />

jumpstart, here are some suggestions to get it going,<br />

and keep it going for years to come.<br />

1. Live a life outside the bedroom that is vital and<br />

adventurous. Stay out of ruts. Avoid stale routines.<br />

Expand your experiences. Take chances. Then bring<br />

this bold attitude to the bedroom!<br />

2. Yes, living with the same person for decades really<br />

is boring. So don’t stay the same person you were<br />

when you met and married. Change. Evolve. Grow.<br />

You have a responsibility to your partner to do that.<br />

Expand your boundaries. Keep learning. An active,<br />

curious mind is a sexual turn-on.<br />

3. Keep your relationship emotionally open. Don’t become<br />

one of those couples who have nothing substantial<br />

to say to each other because they’ve eliminated so<br />

many topics over the years. Retain the sexy openness<br />

new lovers share. It’s a form of verbal foreplay.<br />

4. Remember that good sex involves friction and fiction.<br />

Stay sexually stimulated by watching erotic films,<br />

reading sexy books, and indulging your<br />

fantasies.<br />

5. Accept that you and your partner’s sexuality changes<br />

over the years. Adapt your lovemaking style to the<br />

changes. Be flexible. Rigidity is deadly, especially in<br />

the bedroom. Find the good in the changes, and make<br />

the most of each new phase of life.<br />

6. Stay active, fit, and healthy. You probably can’t<br />

maintain a good sex life unless you do.<br />

7. Last, remember that attitude is everything. When<br />

you approach life with hope and enthusiasm, you<br />

make the best of the bad days and enjoy the good<br />

ones to the fullest. A good attitude creates sexual<br />

energy.<br />

Couples who never lose the magic have a special<br />

relationship that attracts others to them - they act<br />

like not only lovers, but friends. Most of us like to be<br />

around lovers. We want to believe the magic, and we<br />

can, because the magic is real!<br />

Kara Czerniak is a romance consultant with UnderCover-<br />

Wear, Inc., a company dedicated to educating women of<br />

all ages how to rediscover themselves and stay connected<br />

with their partners. She can be contacted for home parties<br />

and individual consultations at 412.719.7003 or by e-mail<br />

at karaucw@comcast.net.<br />

Jive Medical Dictionary<br />

Barium - what you do when the patient dies<br />

Bunion - Paul’s surname<br />

Cat Scan - when the Secret Service looks for<br />

Socks<br />

Cauterize - made eye contact with her<br />

Constipation - endangered feces<br />

Coronary - domesticated yellow bird<br />

D&C - where Washington is<br />

Dilate - to live a long time<br />

Enema - opposite of a friend<br />

Fibrillate - to tell a small lie<br />

Genital - non-Jew<br />

Hernia - pertaining to a female’s knee<br />

Humerus - to tell us what we want<br />

to hear<br />

Intestine - currently taking an exam<br />

Node - was aware of<br />

Outpatient - a person who has fainted<br />

Ova - finished; done with<br />

Pap smear - to slander your father<br />

Pelvis - the evil twin of Elvis<br />

Paradox - two doctors<br />

Penis - someone who plays the piano<br />

Rectum - dang near killed him<br />

Sacrum - holy<br />

Seizure - Roman Emperor<br />

Sperm - to reject, look away from<br />

Urine - the opposite of “you’re out!”<br />

White Count - the number of<br />

Caucasians<br />

18 <strong>OCT</strong> <strong>2006</strong><br />

<strong>OCT</strong> <strong>2006</strong><br />

19


20 <strong>OCT</strong> <strong>2006</strong> <strong>OCT</strong> <strong>2006</strong> 21<br />

Kristol<br />

Kristol is originally from Long Island,<br />

NY and currently resides in Florida.<br />

She is a real estate agent, and has<br />

modeled for the past eight years.<br />

She loves modeling and ‘exploring the<br />

creative side of the process’ - such as<br />

collaborating with photographers and<br />

has traveled all over to do so.<br />

On her spare time, she loves to exercise,<br />

go roller blading, flips through<br />

fashion magazines to get ideas for<br />

great photographs and reads good<br />

books. She also loves to hang out<br />

with her two dogs ‘the lights of her<br />

life whom make life very interesting’:<br />

a Chihuahua and a great Dane named<br />

Jordan and Leo!<br />

October Cover Girl


Celebrity Chef Cook-Off<br />

Monday, Nov. 6, <strong>2006</strong><br />

to benefit the Cystic Fibrosis<br />

Foundation<br />

NAKAMA Japanese Steakhouse and Sushi bar will host the second annual Celebrity Chef Cook-Off to benefit the Cystic Fibrosis Foundation.<br />

Under the watchful eyes of famed NAKAMA chefs, sports figures, business community notables and other local celebrities will prepare<br />

traditional hibachi-style dinner for guests.<br />

Come early or stay after to enjoy the sounds of three of Pittsburgh’s top DJs from HotHitz DJs, an amazing silent auction and two bars in the<br />

outside heated tent. And, don’t forget to come prepared to bid on your chef ’s autographed apron!<br />

You don’t want to miss this opportunity to contribute to the Cystic Fibrosis Foundation, meet and eat with celebrity chefs and enjoy the<br />

establishment voted #1 Best Overall Restaurant in Pittsburgh!<br />

Only 32 tables are available - be sure to get your reservation in early!<br />

Choose from a 6:30 or 8:30 p.m. seating and four sponsorship levels:<br />

$7,500 Presenting Sponsor ($7,232 is tax-deductible)<br />

sponsor name listed as presenting sponsor,<br />

(ie, “NAKAMA Japanese Steakhouse and Sushi Bar Celebrity Chef Cook-Off, presented by ABC Company”)<br />

table for eight<br />

sponsor table signage<br />

8x10 keepsake photo of your table (one for each guest)<br />

chef apron signed by your celebrity chef (one for each guest)<br />

full-page acknowledgement in event program<br />

prominent corporate logo visibility on all event materials and chapter Web site<br />

recognition in all press releases<br />

$5,000 Supporting Sponsor ($4,732 is tax-deductible)<br />

table for eight<br />

sponsor table signage<br />

5x7 keepsake photo of your table (one for each guest)<br />

half-page acknowledgement in event program<br />

prominent corporate logo visibility on all event materials<br />

$2,500 VIP Sponsor ($2,252 is tax-deductible)<br />

table for eight<br />

sponsor table signage<br />

prominent corporate logo visibility on all event materials<br />

$1,500 Patron Sponsor ($1,308 is tax-deductible)<br />

table for eight<br />

sponsor table signage<br />

sponsor name listed in event program<br />

$200 Individual Ticket ($176 is tax-deductible)<br />

individual tickets will be sold within two weeks from the event if all tables are not purchased<br />

please call ASAP to place your name on the waiting list to be called if individual seats become available<br />

Tables are limited – only 32 - so make your reservation early!<br />

For reservations or more information, please contact the Cystic Fibrosis Foundation – Western PA<br />

Chapter at 412-321-4422 or e-mail mvilliotti@cff.org.<br />

<strong>OCT</strong> <strong>2006</strong><br />

23


Over<br />

125 Million Slices Sold<br />

25 Years of Serving Pizza Perfectly!<br />

Italian Restaurant & Pizza<br />

Eat In - Take Out - Delivery<br />

(Sorry, No Delivery at the North Hills Location)<br />

North Hills 412-821-0600<br />

Downtown 412-261-2080<br />

Zelienople 724-453-3200<br />

Wexford 724-935-4151<br />

www.montecellos.com<br />

Shaler Twp 412-784-0888<br />

Hampton 724-444-3040<br />

Cranberry 724-772-3133<br />

Sewickley 412-741-7868<br />

<br />

<br />

<br />

<br />

<br />

<br />

<br />

<br />

<br />

24 <strong>OCT</strong> <strong>2006</strong><br />

Pizza<br />

Traditional Pizza<br />

The Original Thin Pizza<br />

Sicilian Pizza<br />

Old Island Recipe, Thick,<br />

Square & Spicy<br />

Chicago Deep Dish<br />

Round & Thick Topped with<br />

Imported Tomato Filets<br />

Joe’s Special<br />

Extra Thick & Round with<br />

Extra Cheese & Spicy Sauce<br />

Steak, Onion ‘n’ Ranch<br />

Ranch Dressing, Steak & Red Onions<br />

Veggie Pizza<br />

Olives, Tomatoes, Broccoli, Onions,<br />

Mushrooms, Green Peppers<br />

New York Thin<br />

Extra Thin, Crispy Dough Topped with<br />

Imported Tomato Filets<br />

Hot Hoagies Half or Whole<br />

Steak f Italian f Meatball<br />

Jumbo Fish f Breaded Chicken<br />

Hot Sausage f Chicken Parmesan<br />

Pasta Dinner<br />

Spaghetti f Sea Shells f Penne<br />

Fettucini f Angel Hair f Linguini<br />

Above Served with<br />

Homemade Spaghetti Sauce,<br />

Garden Salad & Garlic Loaf<br />

or Italian Bread<br />

Calzone<br />

Golden Brown Dough Pocket<br />

Baked & Stuffed with Pizza<br />

Cheese & Ricotta Cheese. Your<br />

Choice of Any 2 Pizza Toppings<br />

Inside.<br />

Soup<br />

Bowl or Cup<br />

Homemade Italian<br />

Wedding Soup<br />

Soup Du Jour<br />

Salads<br />

Anti Pasta Salad<br />

Small or Large<br />

Steak Salad<br />

Grilled Chicken Salad<br />

Each Store Independently Owned and Operated. Prices and Menu Selections May Vary.<br />

Dinner Favorites<br />

Eggplant Parmesan<br />

Round Slices of Fresh Eggplant<br />

Breaded, Fried, then Baked in Sauce &<br />

Topped with Mozzarella Cheese<br />

Pasta Primavera<br />

Your Choice of Pasta Covered with Veggies in<br />

Oil & Garlic Add Chicken<br />

Chicken Parmesan<br />

Fresh Sliced, Breaded & Fried with a side of<br />

Pasta<br />

Ravioli (Meat or Cheese)<br />

Five Large Pockets Baked & Covered with<br />

Sauce<br />

Stuffed Shells<br />

Four Large Shells Stuffed with Ricotta Cheese<br />

Filling<br />

Veal Parmesan<br />

Fresh Sliced, Breaded & Fried with a side of<br />

Pasta<br />

Hot Sausage Casserole on Bed of Pasta<br />

Two Pieces of Hot Sausage over Pasta, Baked<br />

Lasagna (Meat or Cheese)<br />

Baked Fresh Daily - All Time Customer<br />

Favorite<br />

Meatball Casserole on Bed of Pasta<br />

Four Large Meatballs over Pasta, Baked<br />

<strong>OCT</strong> <strong>2006</strong><br />

25


Three Football Fans<br />

Three football fans were on their way to watch<br />

the games when one noticed a foot sticking out<br />

of the bushes by the side of the road.<br />

They stopped and discovered a beautiful nude<br />

female dead drunk. Out of respect and propriety,<br />

the Steelers fan took off his cap and placed it<br />

over her right breast. The 49ers fan took off his<br />

cap and placed it over her left breast. Following<br />

their lead, the Browns fan took off his Cap and<br />

placed it over her crotch.<br />

The police were called and when the officer<br />

arrived, he conducted his inspection. First, he<br />

lifted up the Steelers cap, replaced it, and wrote<br />

down some notes. Next, he lifted the 49ers cap,<br />

replaced it, and wrote down some more notes.<br />

SUCCESS:<br />

At age 4 success is . . . not peeing in your pants.<br />

At age 12 success is . . . having friends.<br />

At age 16 success is . . . having a drivers license.<br />

At age 35 success is . . . having money.<br />

At age 50 success is . . . having money.<br />

At age 70 success is . . . having a drivers license.<br />

At age 75 success is . . . having friends.<br />

At age 80 success is . . . not peeing in your<br />

pants.<br />

Take the time to live!!!<br />

Life is too short<br />

THE FOUR STAGES OF LIFE:<br />

1) You believe in Santa Claus.<br />

2) You don’t believe in Santa Claus.<br />

3) You are Santa Claus.<br />

4) You look like Santa Claus.<br />

The officer then lifted the Browns cap, replaced<br />

it, then lifted it again, replaced it, lifted it a third<br />

time, and replaced it one last time.<br />

Chris Harper Moving<br />

The Browns fan was getting upset and finally<br />

asked, “What are you, a pervert or something?<br />

Why do you keep lifting and looking, lifting and<br />

looking?”<br />

412-736-6554<br />

Need to move across town? Across the country?<br />

Across the planet? We will move ANYTHING,<br />

ANYWHERE in the world!<br />

“Well,” said the officer, “I am simply surprised.<br />

Normally when I look under a Browns hat, I<br />

find an asshole.”<br />

No Hidden Fees!<br />

No Four Hour<br />

Minimum Charge!<br />

We Accommodate<br />

Last Minute Moves!<br />

Professional,<br />

Courteous Staff!<br />

No Job Too Big<br />

or Too Small!<br />

Great Service!<br />

We are Licensed<br />

and Insured!<br />

26 <strong>OCT</strong> <strong>2006</strong><br />

Call For An Instant Quote!<br />

412-736-6554<br />

<strong>OCT</strong> <strong>2006</strong><br />

27


“Bisexuality immediately doubles your chances<br />

for a date on Saturday night.” -Rodney Dangerfield<br />

“There are a number of mechanical devices<br />

which increase sexual arousal, particularly in<br />

women. Chief among these is the Mercedes-<br />

Benz 380SL.” -Lynn Lavner<br />

“Sex at age 90 is like trying to shoot pool with a<br />

rope.” - Camille Paglia<br />

“Sex is one of the nine reasons for incarnation.<br />

The other eight are unimportant.”<br />

-George Burns<br />

“Women might be able to<br />

fake orgasms. But men can<br />

fake a whole relationship.”<br />

-Sharon Stone<br />

“Hockey is a sport for<br />

white men. Basketball is a<br />

sport for black men. Golf<br />

is a sport for white men<br />

dressed like black pimps.”<br />

-Tiger Woods<br />

“My mother never saw the irony<br />

in calling me a son-of-a-bitch.” -<br />

Jack Nicholson<br />

“Clinton lied. A man might forget where he<br />

parks or where he lives, but he never forgets<br />

oral sex, no matter how bad it is.” -Barbara<br />

Bush (Former US First Lady, and you didn’t<br />

think Barbara had a sense of humor)<br />

“Ah, yes, divorce, from the Latin word meaning<br />

to rip out a man’s genitals through his wallet.”<br />

-Robin Williams<br />

“Women need a reason to have sex. Men just<br />

need a place.” -Billy Crystal<br />

28 <strong>OCT</strong> <strong>2006</strong><br />

Famous<br />

“”<br />

Quotes<br />

“According to a new survey, women say they<br />

feel more comfortable undressing in front of<br />

men than they do undressing in front of other<br />

women. They say that women are too judgmental,<br />

where, of course, men are just grateful.”<br />

- Robert De Niro<br />

“There’s a new medical crisis. Doctors are reporting<br />

that many men are having allergic reactions<br />

to latex condoms. They say they cause<br />

severe swelling. So what’s the problem?”<br />

-Dustin Hoffman<br />

“There’s very little advice in men’s<br />

magazines, because men think, ‘I<br />

know what I’m doing. Just show<br />

me somebody naked!” -Jerry<br />

Seinfeld<br />

“See, the problem is that<br />

God gives men a brain<br />

and a penis, and only<br />

enough blood to run one<br />

at a time.” -Robin Williams<br />

“It’s been so long since I’ve<br />

had sex, I’ve forgotten who<br />

ties up whom.” -Joan Rivers<br />

“Sex is one of the most wholesome,<br />

beautiful and natural experiences money<br />

can buy.” -Steve Martin<br />

“You don’t appreciate a lot of stuff in school<br />

until you get older. Little things like being<br />

spanked every day by a middle-aged woman.<br />

Stuff you pay good money for in later life.”<br />

-Elmo Phillips<br />

“ Bigamy is having one wife too many. Monogamy<br />

is the same.” -Oscar Wilde<br />

“ It isn’t premarital sex if you have no intention<br />

of getting married.” -George Burns<br />

<strong>OCT</strong> <strong>2006</strong><br />

7


When Girls<br />

DRINKToo<br />

Much ...<br />

1. We have absolutely no idea where our purse is.<br />

2. We believe that dancing with our arms overhead<br />

and wiggling our butt while yelling “WOO-<br />

HOO!” is truly the sexiest dance move around.<br />

3. We’ve suddenly decided that we want to kick<br />

someone’s ass and honestly believe we could do<br />

it too.<br />

4. In our last trip to pee, we realize that we now<br />

look more like a homeless hooker than the<br />

goddess we were just four hours ago.<br />

5. We start crying and telling everyone we see that<br />

we love them soooo much.<br />

6. We get extremely excited and jump up and<br />

down every time a new song plays because “Oh<br />

my God! Oh my God! I LOVE this song!”<br />

7. We’ve found a deeper/spiritual side to the geek<br />

sitting next to us.<br />

8. We’ve suddenly take up smoking and are really<br />

good at it.<br />

9. We yell at the bartender, who we believe cheated<br />

us by giving us just lemonade - but that’s just<br />

because we can no longer taste the gin.<br />

10. We think we are in bed, but our pillow feels<br />

strangely like the kitchen floor (or the mop?)<br />

11. We fail to notice that the toilet lid is down when<br />

we sit on it.<br />

12. We take our shoes off because we believe<br />

it’s their fault that we’re having problems<br />

walking straight.<br />

Share this with<br />

all the women you<br />

know who like to<br />

have fun!<br />

20<br />

30 40 50 30<br />

Steeler Mania<br />

Watch the Steelers Games at these Locations:<br />

Uno’s<br />

1294 Freedom Rd.<br />

Cranberry, PA 16066<br />

724.772.1711<br />

$2.00 for 20 oz. Drafts<br />

(except Sam Adams)<br />

Snack Hour Menu<br />

Win a Pizza Party for 6!<br />

Sunny Jim’s<br />

255 Camp Horne Rd<br />

Pittsburgh, PA 15202<br />

412-761-6700<br />

Free Half Time Buffet<br />

$10 Buckets of Beer<br />

Montecello’s<br />

North Hills & Wexford Locations<br />

412-821-0600 724-935-4151<br />

20 oz Coors Light Draft - $1.50<br />

20 oz Yuengling Light Draft - $1.50<br />

Free Halftime Buffet<br />

We’re Smokin<br />

2312 Babcock Blvd<br />

Pittsbugh, PA 15237<br />

PH: 412-931-3190<br />

DiPietro’s Ristorante<br />

412 Perry Highway - West View<br />

Pittsburgh, PA<br />

412-931-9878<br />

2 Racks Ribs & 2 Dozen Wings<br />

With Cornbread & 4 lbs Sides -$49.95<br />

16 Pieces Smoked Chicken with<br />

2 lbs sides - $29.95<br />

3 lbs Pulled Pork with<br />

3 lbs sides - $32.95<br />

One Large Pizza & Dozen Wings $12.99<br />

Two Whole Hoagies $10.99<br />

Pick up or Delivery Only!!<br />

30 <strong>OCT</strong> <strong>2006</strong><br />

Visit our Mania Page Online at: www.nightwire.net<br />

To See Photos Taken During the Games!<br />

<strong>OCT</strong> <strong>2006</strong><br />

31


Evanescence<br />

6 6<br />

Having sold nearly 14 million records worldwide,<br />

well more than 6 million in the U.S. alone, with<br />

their major-label debut Fallen, Evanescence is poised<br />

to continue their meteoric rise with their forthcoming<br />

CD, The Open Door (Wind-up Records),<br />

scheduled for release October 3. The album from<br />

the two-time Grammy-winning band is defined by<br />

Amy Lee’s beautiful melodies, compelling lyrics,<br />

poignant piano and stunning vocals, fused with<br />

Terry Balsamo’s urgent, yet intricate guitar, to form<br />

a seamless, ethereal mixture that perfectly channels<br />

the band’s hard rock and classical sensibilities. The<br />

contributions of members John LeCompt (guitar)<br />

and Rocky Gray (drums) are also evident.<br />

“Making this record has been really intense,” explains<br />

Lee. “Terry suffered a stroke last October<br />

and is still recovering, we got a new manager [Andy<br />

Lurie], and a difficult breakup. But everything we’ve<br />

been through together has benefited this album.”<br />

With Fallen, says Lee, the band had much to prove<br />

while defining its identity. This time, finding a<br />

cohesive writing partner in Terry Balsamo, “we really<br />

took our time crafting this album and had the<br />

freedom to express a broader range of emotions: not<br />

just pain and sadness, but also anger and, yes, even<br />

happiness.”<br />

Written late last year, The Open Door was recorded<br />

at The Record Plant in Los Angeles and mixed at<br />

Ocean Way Studios in March <strong>2006</strong>. Marking the<br />

return of long-time friend and producer Dave Fortman,<br />

the album’s musical elements include a classically-infused<br />

choir and strings on several tracks,<br />

giving further color to songs of introspection, longing,<br />

doubt, self-respect and, ultimately, empowerment.<br />

The album opens with “Sweet Sacrifice,” a<br />

post-relationship catharsis that head-dives from an<br />

otherworldly intro into a hard-driving thrash of hard<br />

rock guitars and soaring rock vocals. Its first single,<br />

the mid-tempo “Call Me When You’re Sober,” reinforces<br />

the moving-away-from-dysfunction theme.<br />

Other standout tracks on The Open Door include<br />

“Lithium,” which embraces feeling over numbness,<br />

“All That I’m Living For,” Lee’s tribute to band<br />

life, “Weight of the World,” her plea for perspective<br />

from the expectation of young fans, and “Good<br />

Enough,” a string-and-choir-infused closer distinguished<br />

as the band’s first truly (almost) contented<br />

song (“It feels really good ending the album this<br />

way,” says Lee). Having toured for a year-and-a-half<br />

straight with only a month off following the release<br />

of Fallen, Evanescence hopes to hit the road this<br />

time out with a care not to neglect key markets<br />

worldwide. Its U.S. tour begins immediately after<br />

the October 3 debut of The Open Door, rewarding<br />

hardcore fans with a “sneak peak” at the album<br />

handful of more intimate theater dates before segueing<br />

into much larger arena shows.<br />

Originally hailing from Little Rock, Arkansas, the<br />

band’s evolving sound – a<br />

nearly mystical marriage between<br />

rock, goth and classical<br />

– was informed by a curious<br />

duality. Lee, who spent nine<br />

years studying classical piano,<br />

explains, “When I was in<br />

high school I listened to a lot<br />

of death metal bands. Both<br />

genres are intricate, complex<br />

types of music that are very<br />

dramatic, and I’m naturally<br />

drawn to that.”<br />

Evanescence self-released two EPs and a first fulllength<br />

album, the much-sought-after Origin, before<br />

finding a home at Wind-up Records. Fallen, their<br />

major-label debut, was released in April 2003 to<br />

critical and commercial success. The internationally<br />

appealing Top 10 singles “Bring Me to Life” and<br />

“My Immortal” helped drive airplay and led to two<br />

2003 Grammy Awards (Best New Artist and Best<br />

Hard Rock Performance for “Bring Me To Life”).<br />

Propelling the band to sales of nearly 14 million albums<br />

worldwide, Fallen spent more than 100 weeks<br />

on Billboard’s Top 200 chart, was certified gold or<br />

platinum in over 35 countries, and sold out arenas<br />

globally. Anywhere But Home, their 2004 live DVD<br />

release, has sold over one million copies to date.<br />

The inherent drama in Evanescence’s music – a<br />

kind of audio odyssey that can turn on a dime from<br />

piano-led introspection to hammering guitar – has<br />

resonated with listeners everywhere. The band’s aggressive<br />

core finds a counterpart in Lee’s passionate<br />

vocals, lyrics that forge a connection with audiences<br />

searching for identity or struggling with feelings of<br />

desire, hope love and loss. The Open Door is a logical<br />

(but certainly not predictable) transformation of<br />

epic proportions for the band, which, in many ways<br />

has only just begun to make its mark on the music<br />

world.<br />

32 <strong>OCT</strong> <strong>2006</strong><br />

<strong>OCT</strong> <strong>2006</strong><br />

33


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e i a d h f c ^ _ ` e i a d h f<br />

Horoscopes by Terry Lamb October <strong>2006</strong><br />

LIBRA<br />

Sept 22 - Oct 23<br />

AQUARIUS<br />

Jan 19 - Feb 18<br />

GEMINI<br />

May 20 - June 21<br />

New romantic connections are possible through October<br />

15, but there are obscuring factors that may make it hard<br />

to judge if the new prospect is for real due to Mercury’s<br />

impending retrograde. You’ll have to give it time to know<br />

if you can trust the person, at least through November<br />

17. If may be wise to delay intimacy, no matter how<br />

much you want it. Children’s demands for new toys and<br />

pastimes could put the pinch on your budget later, even<br />

though you’re feeling flush now. Thinking ahead will help<br />

you avoid difficulties later.<br />

With your attention mostly on your career, you could<br />

overlook sensitive relationship situations and say the<br />

wrong thing, especially as the tensions mount the end of<br />

the month. Just being alert to others’ perspectives will<br />

keep your communications in balance. Critical dates are<br />

October 5, 15, 22 and 24.<br />

PISCES<br />

Feb 18 - Mar 20<br />

You have more time this month for doing what you<br />

love most – socializing. From parties to dinner<br />

with a few friends to a romantic evening with your<br />

partner, you will revel in the joy of what has been<br />

a rare experience for you this year – relaxation and<br />

appreciation of life with those you love.<br />

CANCER<br />

June 21 - July 22<br />

36 <strong>OCT</strong> <strong>2006</strong><br />

SCORPIO<br />

Oct 23 - Nov 22<br />

This may be a good time to speak thoughtfully, as<br />

Mercury begins it retrograde through your sign. Since it is<br />

a Scorpio quality to withhold your point of view, perhaps<br />

until it is too late, letting others know in a low-key way<br />

what your needs are could be a good start in a new communicative<br />

direction for you.<br />

SAGITTARIUS<br />

Nov 22 - Dec 21<br />

Family are more conciliatory now, especially early in the<br />

month, so leap on the opportunity to heal wounds if it<br />

presents itself. There’ll be a process here that plays out<br />

over October and November, with key dates of October<br />

10 and November 1, 8, 14 and 22. By seeing it as<br />

something that takes more than one encounter to heal,<br />

and by allowing the other parties to see the truth for<br />

themselves, you are responding in the best possible way.<br />

CAPRICORN<br />

Dec 21 - Jan 19<br />

You’re rethinking the ways you connect with others<br />

through your network of friends, colleagues, organizations<br />

and clubs. In the wake of the past year’s growth in this<br />

area, it’s time to take stock of what you want to take with<br />

you into the coming Jupiter cycle, which starts November<br />

23. As Mercury retrogrades through your 11th House<br />

starting 10/18, you may reconsider responsibilities you<br />

took on and extricate yourself from them. If you can give<br />

key people the heads-up before then, your news will be<br />

easier to accept.<br />

You’ve never felt better about your direction in life, and<br />

those close to you are behind you one hundred percent.<br />

Don’t forget to express your appreciation. You’ve come<br />

through a challenging period, and you wouldn’t have<br />

made it without them. You gain the support of others,<br />

perhaps even media attention from far and wide, and this<br />

may include financial reward.<br />

ARIES<br />

Mar 20 - Apr 19<br />

The harmonizing planets are principally felt in your<br />

social life, where difficulties in groups are haled<br />

with the help of a few friends. This involves the<br />

mediation of several people to open the channels to<br />

negotiations and accord. Key dates are October 3,<br />

10, 13, 18 and 19. Events on October 5, 15,<br />

and 22 feed a long-term process that affects your<br />

flow of income.<br />

TAURUS<br />

Apr 19 - May 20<br />

If it seems as though you have another full-time job<br />

taking care of your home and family duties, that’s<br />

Saturn speaking. You’ve been caring more responsibility<br />

there, and that pulls you away for what you’ve<br />

been working toward in your career since 1998.<br />

Although you have another year of this push-pull<br />

process, it gets tremendously easier now. It helps<br />

to remember that personal and family happiness and<br />

security are the goal of career growth, not the other<br />

way around. Listen to what those closest to you<br />

have to say and they will become more insistent after<br />

October 28. Key listening dates are October 5,<br />

15, 22 and 24.<br />

Life is rich with pleasure, especially through October 24,<br />

because you can focus your attention on your home once<br />

more. Children go through an adjustment period to new<br />

influences starting October 1, which becomes apparent<br />

as the month waxes. They need to know why about<br />

something before they’ll accept it. Key dates are October<br />

5, 15, and 22. If you prepare them well, follow-up<br />

events in November and December will flow more<br />

smoothly. Romantic ties go through an adjustment period<br />

as well, backtracking to a previous stage in the relationship<br />

to accommodate your partner’s emotional needs.<br />

LEO<br />

July 22 - Aug 22<br />

Mercury’s latest retrograde, which starts on October 28,<br />

will bring issues out at home, enabling you to clear the<br />

air about suppressed issues. Communications early in the<br />

month will reveal the form the relevant situations will take,<br />

even though the underlying issues will be the ones you’ve<br />

been dealing with all year. Observe what you experience<br />

on October 15, 22 and 24 for events that will give you<br />

clues to what’s up, and you may even be able to head off<br />

misunderstandings at these times. You can smooth over<br />

emotional issues by spending time together outside your<br />

home – go to a move or community event to bring your<br />

relationship back to neutral ground.<br />

VIRGO<br />

Aug 22 - Sept 22<br />

If your partner is more conciliatory now, it is because<br />

you are more relaxed. You can use this time to<br />

refocus your relationships in a positive direction,<br />

especially in the first half of the month. Listen<br />

closely to what others are saying, but don’t ignore<br />

your own insights. As the month waxes, an issue<br />

will emerge that raises the old dilemma of who’s right<br />

and who’s wrong, and you’ll find that it’s somewhere<br />

in between.<br />

<strong>OCT</strong> <strong>2006</strong> 37


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