Issue 1

قصص مصورة من هنا وهناك 

picture stories from here and there 

1 

18+

contents 

Editorial : So, What Is A Samandal?............................................3 

THE FDZ 

Khkhkh................................................................................................... 7 

HATEM IMAM 

Suspended Time, Number 1: The Family Tree.......................14 

MAZEN KERBAJ 

Glitterpill......................................................................................36 

ELYSE TABET 

the Educator...............................................................................38 

FOUAD R MEZHER 

Salon Tarek el Khurafi..............................................................65 

OMAR KHOURI 

Yoghurt & Jam...........................................................................93 

LENA MERHEJ 

Happy Birthday to Me........................................................104 

FARAH NEHME 

Dans le Taxi...........................................................................109 

BARRACK RIMA 

Nicoptine............................................................................... 129 

ISABELLE BOINOT 

The Vacant Lot.......................................................................147 

ANDY WARNER

Khkhkh 

Hatem Imam 

Read in this direction 

vroom 

Toot 

Whoosh... 

Wrrr...wrrr...

foooo… 

Fshhhhh….. 

Whoosh.. 

Tick... 

squeeeaaaak…. 

Dub… 

Tub… 

Wrrrr…. 

Fffffffffffff….

Click.. 

Dub... 

Tub.. 

voommm… 

Ffff… 

whooosh….

Khsh…. 

Ooof… 

Ffffff… 

squeaaak…. 

(right to left) squeaaaaak...vrrr...brrr...shffff...tick..wrrr...beep...dub...hmmm…. 

Ffffffffffff….

(Top to bottom) Beep! Ffffff…..nnnnnn….streeeeechhhh...pull….zzzzzz…..hhh...tick...fluff..dub….wheee...mmmm… 

sssss...brrbrrbrrr

The end

Suspended Time, Number 1: 

The Family Tree 

by Mazen Kerbaj


People and Places 

The Hanin Family Association 

Held a meeting on 16/12/2000 at the St. Georges Cathedral in Hadath in order to 

elect new board members. After the election, positions were assigned to each 

of the new members 

Evan Antoine Mazen Kerbaj 

Mr. Mazen Antoine Kerbaj and his wife Mrs. Diana (formerly Ayyoub) were 

blessed with a newborn boy - their first - named Evan Antoine (Trad Hospital) 

Tasha Roger Ghoreyyeb 

Roger Ghoreyyeb and his wife Katia (formerly Haddad) are pleased to 

announce the birth of their first daughter, named Tasha, born 3/2/2001 (St. 

Georges Hospital, Beirut) 













People 
























People 









People 









People 









People 








Georges Hospital, Beirut)

People 


Mr. Mazen Antoine Kerbaj and his wife Mrs. Diana (formerly Ayyoub) were blessed 

with a newborn boy - their first 

People 








People? 

van Antoine Mazen Kerbaj 

Mr. Mazen Antoine Kerbaj and his wife Mrs. Diana (formerly Ayyoub) were blessed 

with a newborn boy - their first 

People 



blessed with a newborn boy - their first 

Who CARES ABOUT 

People? 

People? 

Antoine Mazen Kerbaj 



WHO CARES ABOUT 

People? 

Antoine Mazen Kerbaj



The first generation 


Antoine Kerbaj 




OR 




the father 



OR 

Antoine Kerbaj


the father 



the father 


and then 

1975 

BEGINNING OF THE WAr 

in lebanon 

1975 

1975 

the WAr 

BEGINNING OF THE WAr 

in lebanon 

1975 

1975 

the WAr 

the WAr 

1975 

1975

the WAr 

the WAr 

1975 

1975 

the WAr 

the WAr 

1975 

1975 

the WAr 

the WAr 

1975 

1975 

The second generation 

the WAr 

1975 

And Also 

A Birth 

the WAr 

1975 

And Also



the WAr? 

the WAr 

1975 



the WAr? 

the WAr? 



the WAr? 

the WAr? 



WHY 

WAr? 

the WAr?



WHY is this joint going out? 

why? 



the joint’s gone out 

the joint’s going out 



the joint’s gone out 


The second generation


People 


People 





People 








Mazen Kerbaj 


THE SON 

Mazen Kerbaj 

Mazen Kerbaj 

Mazen Kerbaj

THE adventures of 

Beirut 

Mazen Kerbaj 

IN 

Beirut 

and 

mini market abu koko 

Beirut 

Beirut 

and 

AT SUNSET 


and 

AT SUNSET 


Beirut 

Beirut 

and 

AT SUNSET 

so 

and 

AT SUNSET 


Beirut 

Beirut

and 

AT SUNSET 

so, then 

in 

Beirut 

and 

AT SUNSET 

so, then 

Beirut 

and 

AT SUNSET 

so, then 

in 

and 

Beirut 

and 

AT SUNSET 

so, then 

in 

and 

Beirut 

and 

AT SUNSET 

so, then 

in 

and 

and 

AT SUNSET 

so, then 

in 

and 

and 

AT SUNSET 

so, then 

in 

and 

and 

AT SUNSET 

so, then 

in 

and

and 

AT SUNSET 

so, then 

in 

and 

and 

AT SUNSET 

so, then 

in 

and 

and 

AT SUNSET 

so, then 

in 

and 

and 

AT SUNSET 

so, then 

in 

and 

and 

and 

in 

and 

then 

in 

and 

The Third generation 


and 

in 

and




THE SON’s Son 




Evan Kerbaj 








Evan Kerbaj 

I draw better than you do 



Evan Kerbaj



Evan Kerbaj 



Evan Kerbaj 

AND AFTER THAT 


Evan Kerbaj 

AND then 

AND then 

the father 

and the son 

and the son’s son 

AND then 

the father 

and the son 


AND then 

the father 

and the son 


we come 

to 

we come 

to 

THE END

AND after 

AND after 

THE END? 

THE END? 

AND after 

AND after 

THE END? 

THE END? 

after 

AND after 

THE END 

THE END? 

after 

after 

THE END 

THE END 

we return to

after 

after 

THE END 

THE END 

we return to 

we return to 

the beginning 

and after 

after 

THE END? 

THE END 

and after 

and after? 

THE END? 

THE END 

and after 

and after? 

THE END? 

THE END



and THEN 

Evan Kerbaj 

THE adventures of 

Mazen Kerbaj 

IN 

Beirut 

and 

AT SUNSET 

so, then 

in 

and 

the WAr 

The SECONd generation 

THE SON 

MAZEN Kerbaj 

1975 













The FIRST generation 

THE FATHER 

ANTOINE Kerbaj

The beginning 



Mr. Mazen Antoine Kerbaj and his wife Mrs. Diana (formerly 

Ayyoub) were blessed with a newborn boy - their first - named 

Evan Antoine (Trad Hospital) 


Roger Ghoreyyeb and his wife Katia (formerly Haddad) are 

pleased to announce the birth of their first daughter, named 

Tasha, born 3/2/2001 (St. Georges Hospital, Beirut) 

In 

The beginning 


Ghoreyyeb 

The beginning 


Tasha Rog Ghoreyyeb 

In 

The beginning 

And 

Before 

Each 

Of 

The father 


Ghoreyyeb 

In 

The beginning 

And 

Before 

Each 

Of 


Ghoreyyeb 

In 

The beginning 

And 

Before 

Each 

Of 

The father 

And 

The son 

AND THE SON’S SON 


Ghoreyyeb 

In 

The beginning 

And 

Before 

Each 

Of 

The father 

And 

The son 


Ghoreyyeb

The beginning 


AND THE SILVER SCREEN GODDESS 

LAURE Ghoreyyeb 

Of 

In 

The beginning 

And Before Each Of 

The father 

And The son 

And The son’S SON 

Was 

the artist the woman the mother 


Ghoreyyeb 

The beginning 

The beginning 


Of 


Of 

The beginning 


Of 


Of 

TOOOT 

TOOOT

TOOOT 

TOOOT 

TOOOT 

TOOOT 

TOOOT 

TOOOT 

TOOOT

And no matter how much we try to push it away…

THE END

y elyse tabet

Salon Tareq el Khurafi 

BY OMAR KHOURY


* 

Tarek el Khurafi’s Barbershop 

* 

Thanks 

for the 

cut, man. 

See ya. 

Bye. 

Take 

care of 

yourself, 

Asad. 

sorry

I am 

indeed. 

How may I 

help you? 

Are 

you Mr. 

Tarek el- 

Khurafi? 

STOP. 

IDENTIFICATION 

PLEASE. 

AND THE 

CONTENTS 

OF YOUR 

POCKETS. 

SEARCH 

THE 

PREMISES! 

WE HAVE RECEIVED 

WORD THAT YOU 

ARE IN THE 

BUSINESS OF 

MANUFACTURING 

AND DISTRIBUTING 

IMAGINARY ARTI– 

FACTS TO THE 

PUBLIC FROM 

THIS LOCATION. 

* 

* 

Ish 

* Mental Security Forces: 

* 

Investigation Bureau 

AND A PACK 

OF CEDARS 

CIGARETTEs 

SIR, ALL HE HAS 

IS 7,000 LIRA 

Certainly, 

we all 

agree 

AS WE ALL 

AGREE 

THAT SUCH 

THINGS DO 

NOT EXIST 

AND HAVE 

NO PLACE 

IN REALITY…

Examine 

it 

Yes 

sir 

As I was saying, as these 

things do not in fact 

exist, there can also 

be no law which exists 

to prohibit them. And 

yet if these allegations 

directed against you turn 

out to be true, we can 

conclude two things: 

Teet 

Teet 

Click 

Click 

Tik 

Click 

Clack! 

Clack!

Click 

Shick 

Shick 

Clack 

Shick! 

Firstly, that you 

are earning your 

wages through 

the deception of 

your customers, 

by selling items 

under false 

pretenses. 

Click 

Click 

Click 

Click 

Click 

Click 

lick 

Pull 

Click 

Pull 

Ish 

And secondly, that 

you are aiding in the 

corruption of the 

citizenry through the 

encouragement of 

escapist, individualistic 

thought, which 

distracts the populace 

from their duties to 

society. 

Teet!

May I remind you, Mr. Khurafi… 

Very well. Take a 

sample for closer 

inspection in the lab, 

take note of his 

particulars and let 

him go. 

Sir, these seem 

like regular 

cigarettes 

I can 

assure 

you, my 

boy, 

That you may also 

be burdening your 

innocent customers 

with unnecessary 

trouble. 

… that this is just a 

rumor started by the 

other barbers in the area 

to steal my customers 

We will 

take our 

leave 

then 

Nothing 

here 

Nothing in 

this room 

All shaving 

equipment 

And 

nothing in 

the storage 

area outside

We hope for your sake 

that you have given us the 

truth, for we guarantee 

we will find out if you 

have been lying. 

* 

* 

Ish 

Shclack! 

Hmm? 

You’re 

mine! 

Double 

3.

Excuse me. 

Can you 

help me 

out for a 

second? 

DOM

* 

** 

* 

* 

** 

The Nation is Our Face 

Public parking

* 

* 

The Face is a blessing from the gods… 

Religious Freedom Party

* 

* 

malek

Malek 

* 

* 

Malek 

Zzzzzzzzzzzip 

Stack! 

Stack!

Knock 

knock 

knock 

DOM 

Just a 

second!

Lulwa? 

Ziiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii 

clack 

tshak 

Can we 

talk? 

Are you 

busy? 

What are 

you doing 

here? 

Hi

Ok. 

Sure. 

Come in. 

Um…

You can put 

your stuff down 

there, behind 

the desk.

Through the 

right there, 

first door on 

your left. 

Where’s the 

bathroom? 

Clack

You wanna 

drink 

anything? 

Apple juice? 

7-up? I 

can make 

coffee… 

Flushshsh 

click 

No, wait. I 

brought you 

something 

that might 

help a little 

more. 

You remember the first time we got drunk? When Abu Raymond 

found us between his barrels of Arak, totally wasted… 

Here’s 

to Abu 

Raymond. 

He couldn’t 

believe 

that you of 

all people 

would do 

such a thing

Tink 

Listen, 

Sura, 

I… 

But I 

still 

consider 

you my 

closest 

friend. 

I know 

we didn’t 

leave off 

on the 

best of 

terms

I need to find a place to live. I’ve got money, 

I just don’t know this city too well. I don’t 

know anyone here but you. 

If you can recommend a good, clean hotel that’s not too expensive 

Just until 

I find an 

apartment 

or a room 

somewhere. 

Did you 

guys have 

a fight? 

So: what 

happened? 

Lulwa, you’ve got a 

suitcase and not much 

else. I know your 

parents, they’d never 

send you off on your 

own without any help. 

What 

do you 

mean? 

Can I at 

least 

ask what 

happened 

first? 

It was 

almost 

three years 

ago… 

My 

parents… 

We were on 

our way to 

school. 

It was 

raining 

really 

hard

My 

parents… 

I got 

wedged 

between 

the two 

seats. 

I didn’t 

really 

get what 

happened 

until after 

the funeral. 

Broke three 

ribs and a 

collarbone.

ziiiii

to be continued


Vienna 1920 

Dhour Choueir 1982 

Jam and Yogurt 

One day in July… 

(or how my mom became Lebanese) 

COME INSIDE!!! 

BOOM 

I heard a loud explosion 

Vienna 1943 

Berlin 1956 

My mom rushed 

us down the stairs, 

counting us along 

the way: one, two, 

three, four, five. 

Are they 

going to 

kill us 

????!!!! 

... 

Beirut 1982 

Karlvary 1920

Stop 

crying, 

it’s pointless! 

I have to 

go get 

milk 

We stayed on the 

stairs for 8 hours 

Every Friday, I go to my mom’s and sit with her. 

I’m going 

up! 

Takes her glasses off 

She puts her papers aside 

As usual, whether I’ve eaten or 

not, Noura brings me a plate of 

rice and curry 

What did 

you eat? 

And asks me: 

She was very angry 

Thank 

you!

Then 

complains 

Then smiles 

and talks 

But when I ask her about her past, she... 

Then 

complains 

Smiles and 

talks 

What did you 

do today? 

And says 

My mom settles herself 

in on the couch 

Why the 

interrogation? 

Why the 

interrogation? 

And then smiles and talks... 

I’m unhappy that you don’t 

want to call your cousin’s 

grandfather’s cousin! 

If I say “the usual”, all hell breaks loose… 

YOU HAVE TO CALL 

YOUR GRANDFATHER’S 

COUSIN’S NEPHEW’S 

UNCLE! 

It would be 

nice if you called the 

son of your uncle’s 

grandfather’s niece! 

If I ask her how she is, she tells me a rambling story with no beginning and no end 

... 

... 

...

Vienna 1961 

Berlin, 1960 

She went to medical school in Vienna and worked as a nurse at the Wilhencinenspital Hospital 

It was love at first sight 

She was alone 

And her walks 

her dog 

She forgot the sweets 

And she learnt Arabic for Ali 

Say: oh cream! Oh 

honey! I can’t live 

without you 

How do I say 

Ish liebe dish 

in Arabic? 

She rejected quite a few suitors… 

Her teacher was Egyptian… 

Then Ali told her he had to marry an Oriental woman 

And kept thinking about 

the man who had filled 

her heart with warmth…

Mariahilfer Strasse 1962 

Stephansplatz 1958 

Our house overlooks the Military Club 

Mulla Street 1970 

Dinnawi Street 

1979 

Ma’arad Street 

1989 

Mar Elias Street 

1994 

* 

* Taxi 

Jounieh 1982 

*Sinno 

* 

Ardati Street 1973 

In 1982, it overlooked the Israel battleships in Jounieh bay 

Ardati Street 1996 

And to swim on the 

bathroom floor 

I learnt to cut things 

with my sister Yasmine 

In this house, I 

learnt to count 

Harf al-Dayr

She showed us where it was - and we 

saw it for the first time - in 1992, since 

the road had been blocked before that. 

She came to Lebanon in 1967, and worked 

as a pediatrician at the German hospital 

facing the St. George hotel 

I’ve often tried to ask her more about that period 

At the time, he was supposed to marry his 

older and younger brothers’ wives’ sister 

She met her first husband through mutual 

friends 

And every time, she replies: 

How could you 

have forgotten 

the cardboard 

box you slept in? 

But all I remember is a wooden bed 

In this way, she entered the Arabist intellectual society 

One day, my mom came back from the hospital, 

and we had to be quiet, because the babies in 

her tummy were dead. 

and a dream I woke up from screaming: 

Give me a 

stream of 

water! 

And chose Beirut as the place to live out her dreams. 

Since that day in summer 1982, we haven’t heard of Karim and Karma

She had three beautiful children, and died 

of cancer in 1981. 

She met her friend through her 

husband. She was a beautiful woman 

Who died from a tooth infection due to a lack 

of antibiotics, according to my mom 

She named me after my 

grandmother, her mom. 

Her wedding dress, 

which is now in one 

of a pile of bags in the 

attic, was purple 

Particularly after my 

sister Mona’s twin died 

I remember that she 

always wore purple 

and works at the 

public library. 

Her daughter got married at a church 

near the museum in 1992. 

And the boys are in France 

She always turned her grief into anger that (which) drove her to work 

My mom loved her so much that she named 

her daughter after her. 

Come on 

Mona! 

We crossed over to the East to visit them 

many times, when the roads were blocked. 

I’ll shell some 

seeds for you! 

But today she has an eye disease that keeps her from working

In 1974, her husband passed away, so she started a daycare center for her three children. 

This daycare center was one of the first in Musseitbeh 

I sometimes go with her to the clinic at the American University Hospital 

So, her acquaintances 

grew… 

hello doctor! 

how are you? 

Good 

morning 

Good 

morning 

hi doctor 

* 

Salwa Merhej and her 

grand-daughter, Mireille 

Marie Rose Boulos and 

her son Paul 

The nurses and doctors all say hello, and sometimes the patients do too 

How are 

the kids? 

Have they 

started 

school? 

How are 

the kids? 

Have they 

started 

school? 

And her second husband, 

my dad. 

* 

Jumblatt, Karami, Berri, Gemayel 

After that, we walk home down Hamra street, and I ask her questions…

I think she went through something similar, and she tried all the hairdos Lebanese women wore. 

As a teenager, she chopped 

her hair off 

When she was a bit older, 

she wrapped them around 

her head 

As a girl, she had pigtails 

I’ve seriously tried to understand what my father means when he says: 

I should always remind 

myself that I didn’t marry 

an Oriental woman 

It’s 7:30, do 

you want 

anything? 

I’m going 

And as the kidnapping of 

foreigners increased, she 

dyed it brown 

In the eighties, she grew it 

down past her shoulders 

When she came 

to Lebanon, it was 

really short 

I tried to separate the Oriental and the Western in her by comparing her to “Oriental” mothers 

And she works a lot 

She gets angry in a 

flash 

She invents inedible 

meals 

My mother sometimes uses 

a strange language when 

she talks on the phone 

Which brought out the 

color and shine of her eyes 

After that, I thought hard about how to get rid of the “foreign” features of my face 

highlights french manicure Lenses 

High-heeled boots 

Till now, I haven’t discovered the exact elements of the Lebanese look 

I never understood what he 

means by Oriental woman 

Social 

chitchat 

and gossip? 

Coffee and 

cigarettes? 

Black 

eyes? 

Obedience? 

Dancing? 

Painted 

toenails? 

...Later, she told me the story of how she had resolved this East-West 

problem, and that it had endangered her life.

My mother stayed in our home on the Corniche 

And Reem: 

Watches Lena and 

Mona 

Mona: 

Feeds Tommy 

Yasmine: 

Prepares food * 

Lena: 

Throws out 

the trash 

Omar: 

Hangs laundry 

out to dry 

*cake or donuts every day, crepes or burgers or spaghetti with pine-nuts and yogurt once a week 

And learnt how to cook and other traditions from her mother-in-law, who stayed and helped her. 

And planted geraniums and hortensias 

on the balcony 

She decorated her home with glass fish 

* 

Meanwhile, my dad would be thinking 

My mom would be at the clinic at 7:30 every morning 

* Gemayel, Karami, Jumblatt, Berri 

* 

Now, at 7:30 a.m., she sits in her armchair and calls us, one after the other. 

* 

Geagea, Berri, Aoun, Jumblatt 

She ran the house like a tight ship whose engine was: us

Hello...Good morning! Did I wake you up?! 

First, she calls Tony, my brother-in-law 

Toot...tooot… 

Hello L..Mon...O...Yas...Reem! Yasmine! 

Yeah, hi mom. How are you? 

Are you still at home? Why don’t you just shut 

the school down? What’s the use? 

Toot….tooot… 

It’s alright, I’m up now. How are you? 

Toot...toot… 

Hello...Lena...How are you? Are you still asleep? Ooh, sorry 

sorry...we’ve missed you… 

Hi mom, what’s up? I saw you yesterday! 

Yeah..Hi...What are you doing? 


I’m tired, wiped out and overworked...come over for a visit… 


Mom...it’s still early 

Do I have to remind you every day that there’s an hour 

time difference? 

Hi Mona. How are you...what? 

Did you go to university today? 

(To be continued)

y Farah Nehme

I’VE OFTEN HEARD OF THE “FIRST KISS”, WHICH I’VE NEVER HAD 

PEOPLE INSIST UPON THE EVENT’S ORIGINALITY… 

...AND THAT IT LEAVES A STEAMY MEMORY AND INDELIBLE MARK ON THE LIPS…

The big day 

Propelled by my steroid hormones 

And guided by common sense 

I wanted to make an amorous conquest 

on the eve of my 20th birthday 

Like all those vamps 

Towards that end, I had been through 

my list of old flames 

In order to stave off any possible failure

This night has to be lucky 

Or I’ll force it to become lucky 

We had cigarettes 

Cheese sticks 

And beer 

The fourth bottle successfully put my conscience to sleep

Two days after that famous night 

I don’t know if I stole it or if it was a kiss based 

on mutual accord and shared desire 

All that remains is the tentative euphoria of an 

uncertain glory...if not a missed opportunity.

In the Taxi, by Barrak Rima 

I read 

somewhere 

that we 

were the 

city’s 

memory... 

tweet 

tweet 

This is just 

a claim, of 

course... 

Mmm… 

where’s 

the 

road 

to 

Tripoli 

tweet 

Good. 

Let’s be 

clear: 

Mmm… 

All we do is 

wander the 

streets pushing 

these carriages 

of books 

around... 

Mmm… 

Hello. I need 

forks, plates and 

coffee cups. 

One minute. 

He’s checking 

his anthropology 

book. 

Knives and 

spoons too... 

Mmm… 

Easy. 

Easy.

You’ll find those at a 

peddler’s in Tripoli... 

Right. It’s a 

fact that to 

be loaded with 

books is to be 

loaded with 

memory... 

Mmm… 

However.. 

Hey! 

What a 

relief! 

What year did 

Sultan Qalaoun 

order the city 

to be razed? 

Take a 

look in the 

Medicine 

book. 

A long 

time ago. 

Aaaah! 

Interesting! 

Easy... 

As I was saying… 

I SELL FORKS! 

I SELL 

PLATES! 

I SELL 

KNIVES AND 

SPOONS! 

I SELL CUUUUPSS 

OOOOOOOF... 

Coffee!

There’s a customer 

waiting for you at the 

end of Mina street in 

Tripoli 

Ah.. 

interesting 

What a 

relief! 

Ouf! 

I have a 

question 

Do you know how to cure a poet-cyclist 

who teaches pre-Islamic Arabic poetry 

and occasionally drives a cab of 

indifference? 

Too easy... 

INCURABLE! 

Shit! 

The poor 

man! 

Sell! 

I sell! 

I SELL! 

I SELL CUUUUPS OF 

COFFEE! 

Shit! 

It’s time 

for a 

break. 

Ouf! 

The claim as I 

was saying is 

that we are the 

city’s itinerant 

memory. 

Mmm… 

Here for example, 

this book confirms 

my theory by which... 

Excuse...Our 

break will soon 

be over. 

Ah, yes...

I was 

saying… 

I had a dream.. 

The city had 

stopped growing. 

No. It had grown 

younger. 

And... 

My mother had 

been cured of 

her incurable 

illness. She 

too had grown 

younger. 

And my grandfather 

was fixing a portrait 

I had made of him. 

What a 

weird 

dream! 

Mmm… 

We learn 

something 

new every 

day, right? 

Mmm… 

So, as 

I was 

saying.. 

Look 

here!

I don’t know what 

to ask today… 

There’s everything: 

Anthropology, sociology, art 

history, politics, mathematics, 

cinema, comics… 

What are 

comics? 

Easy, 

easy! 

Look it up in 

the cooking 

book... 

A pleasurable activity 

that can nevertheless 

give those who practice 

it an incurable 

sense of guilt… 

THAT’S IT! 

I HAVE A 

QUESTION! 

How do we say 

boiled in French? 

“cuit” 

Truly 

simple! 

Mmm… 

In my dream, I 

too had gotten 

younger. 

“cuit” 

Really? 

(cui) 

And I was trying to 

find the road back 

to Mina, in Tripoli. 

What a truly bizarre dream! 

Look it up in the Study 

of the Wandering 

Researcher... 

This story 

has no end. 

Cui 

cui 

It’s weird, I 

can’t find a 

thing about it.. 

Mmm…

Abu Nouhad.. 

I’m going 

to draw 

your 

portrait! 

This isn’t 

Abu Nouhad 

This is 

Abou Nouhad 

With only three strokes, Abu Nouhad had 

managed to make his portrait look like him.

Since then, Abu Nouhad went 

away and his portrait was lost.

Downtown, near the 

Ottoman clock. Take the 

sea route, please. 

* 

* 

TAXI where are we going?

After Beirut, Beirut 

and the memory of 

Beirut, I decided to 

return to Mina, Tripoli.

Character 

I was born here, in the 

backseat of a group 

taxicab on the sea road. 

There was already some 

tension brewing among the 

passengers before they 

got to Mina, where the 

driver asked: 

Driver 

What route should I 

take, the sea road 

or the land one? 

I have to make up my mind 

(fast) (but) all the same, 

choose my words and my 

direction carefully... 

Narrator: 

since the 

passengers had 

already fought 

over the music 

Sea! 

Land! 

Sea! 

Land! 

They had 

hardly left 

downtown 

(near the 

Ottoman 

clock), 

when: 

Someone 

asked: 

Drrrrrivvvverrrr 

don’t you have 

any musiiiiiiic? 

Donnnn’t 

yoooou? 

The driver 

hardly had 

time to 

answer 

before. 

Yes! 

tunes! 

Inta Omri by 

Um Kulthoum 

... 

or 

Chantal 

Goya.. 

Please 

don’t play 

Tchaikovsky 

Are you nuts? 

I’d prefer 

some 

Farid el- 

Atrache 

Demis 

Roussos 

Do 

That seems 

atrocious. 

Charles Aznavour 

Boney M 

Bob 

Jean 

Jacques 

Goldmann 

Julio 

Iglesias 

Sabah 

Claude 

Not 

Euh 

Francois 

him! ? 

Madona 

Sisi 

Shakira 

Haifa 

Wahbi 

Najwa 

Karam 

Assi 

Hellani 

Wadih 

Safi 

Fairouz 

Souma 

Abdel Wahab 

No! Asmahan 

Elvis 

Abba 

Tina Turner 

Amr 

Diab 

Michael 

Jackson 

Abdel 

Halim Hafez 

fifi 

Abdo 

Ya leyli 

ya ein* 

Edith 

Piaff 

* singing

* 

* dancing Tripoli 

Nawal 

Al Zoghbi 

Kazem 

El Saher 

Fares 

Karam 

Nancy 

Ajram 

Diana 

Haddad 

Elissa 

Amal 

Hijazi 

Melhem 

Barrakat 

Katia 

Harb 

Walid 

Toufic 

Nelly 

Makdissi 

Alaa 

Zalzali 

Ragheb 

Alama 

Foulla 

Issam 

Rajji 

Shirine 

Jo 

Achkar 

Euh.. 

Georges 

Wassouf 

Wael 

Kfouri 

Samira 

Toufic 

Carole 

Semaha 

Maya 

Nasri 

Suzanne 

Tammim 

Samira 

Said 

ka... 

ka...ka.. 

Kazem 

Al-Saher! 

Wael 

Tassar 

Jimi 

Hendrix 

Rouwaida 

Atieh 

Diana 

Karazone 

All these 

people 

are 

in the 

same 

taxicab?

This surplus of 

musical demands 

among the taxi 

passengers could 

have set off a 

disaster 

Had the driver 

not found 

an intelligent 

compromise. 

PAROLÉ PAROLÉ PAROLÉ 

PAROLÉ PAROLÉ PAROLÉ 

PAROLÉ PAROLÉ ET 

ENCORE DES PAROLÉ 

OUWA 

OUWAAAAA-AHA 

But a compromise is 

only a compromise 

and the tension in 

the taxi had been 

well-established . 

box 

To these 

PAROLES, the 

car arrived at 

the entrance 

of Mina street 

The 

narrator 

returns 

Sea? Road? 

Sea? 

Road? 

Sooooooo? 

Driiiiiiiiiiiivvvvvverrrrrr? 

Sea? 

Road? 

…. 

Road? 

Or? 

Sea?

The driver 

decided to take 

the sea route. 

Despite his careful choice 

of words, the driver 

couldn’t stop a new 

argument 

breaking out. 

This one was 

even more 

violent. 

I was 

born at 

that very 

moment, 

I was born 

here, in the 

backseat of a 

group taxicab 

on the sea 

road! 

A few months later, 

a terrible war broke 

out in Lebanon. 

* 

* newspaper cut-outs

Meanwhile, in a taxi… 

Ratibée (to Salwa): 

Listen my girl, each State has its conditions 

(She repeats, weighing her words) each State has its conditions 


For example. The European Union - Schengen - sates 

have their conditions: to get political asylum, you have to 

prove that you’re a victim of political persecution in your 

country and that your life is in danger because of your 

political or religious beliefs...or things like this…. 

Salwa (to Ratibée): 

Really?


And Belgium 

But of course there are differences among the Schengen 

states, even 


But these states are 

trying to unify their laws 

on refugees 

Ratibée 

(to Nassim): 

Exactly 

Salwa: 

Fffff 

Nassim (to Ratibée): 

To this end, 

they organized 

a major conference 

in Barcelona 


Europe is barricading itself into an inaccessible fortress, 

rich but surrounded by a poor and under-developed world 

Ratibée (to Nassim): 

Yes...They’re protecting themselves from third-world immigration 


And from the Eastern European countries

I was 

born in a 

taxicab. 

Not the kind 

where you 

pay for all 

five seats... 

And where 

you choose 

the start, the 

destination and 

the route. 

No. I was born 

in a ‘service’, 

or group taxi. 

And at the very 

moment of my birth, 

the passenger 

sitting in the back 

center seat 

made the 

following 

proclamation: 

In a taxicab, a 

person is at the 

cinema. 

To which the 

passenger 

on his right 

enthusiastically 

responded: 

And the 

others 

chimed in: 

We have 

a frame, 

We have what is 

outside the frame, 

The length, 

The image 

and the 

sound. 

The passenger 

on the left: 

I would be 

more inclined 

to say that 

we were at 

the theater. 

Mmm 

At the theater? At the theater? At the theater? At the theater? At the theater? At the theater?

AT 

THE 

THEA 

TER 

At the 

theater! 

At the 

theater! 

Attention: we’re 

at the THEATER! 

At the theater! 

Yeah? 



At the theater!! 

Ah 


At the 

theater! 

And 

comics? 

Mmh 

Ah 

Ah 

At the 

theater! 

And the 

cinema? 

And 

the 

taxicab? 

Aaah! 

At the 

theater!

And this is the 

public’s reaction: 

What is this 

story that has 

no beginning 

and no end?! 

I don’t like 

Theater! 

Ha 

Ha 

This story 

just drags 

on… 

Ffff... 

Ha ha ha 

ha ha ha ha 

ha ha haha ha 

haha ha 

ha ha 

I lost the 

narrative... 

PAROLÉ 

PAROLÉ 

PAROLÉ

I’m afraid 

of boredom 

So? 

Road? 

Sea? 

Driver? 

Haha 

Z.. 

Z. 

This story 

is neither 

aesthetic 

nor 

narrative! 

In 

truth.. 

What 

happens 

next? What 

happens 

next? 

...

Lets get back to the 

story...otherwise it’ll 

go all over the place 

We are 

in a 

comic. 

We are 

not at the 

theater. 

Nor at 

the cinema. 

Not even 

in a 

taxicab. 

But the 

setting 

is a 

taxicab 

Well 

said! 

Go on, 

narrator. 

I was saying: at 

the very moment 

I was born, the 

driver made 

the following 

proclamation: 

I had a weird dream. I 

had become young again, 

but could not find the 

roads of my youth... 

It’s unbelievable that we 

haven’t been able to find 

anything about that dream! 

It’s tough! 

Really 

tough! 

I’m 

lost! 

Cui 

Cui 

Meanwhile, in 

a taxi, 

Cui 

Cui 

The next 

time, I 

promise 

I’ll take 

off my 

glasses. 

End 

Applause

nicoptine 

isabelle boinot 

starring, among others 

Pete Jess Frank Anita 

It’s summer in Capulco 

Pete works at a grocer’s. He’s replacing 

Marc, his girlfriend Jess’ dad, who’s on 

vacation. Jess is on vacation, preparing for 

her degree in the 1000 meter crawl. Her 

friend Anita is starting a police career, 

alongside her colleague Frank. 

Dan would like a share in Pete and Jess’ (who 

he is madly in love with) intimate life. 

Pete and Dan arrive at the pool 

Do you think 

she’d go for it? 

Listen Dan, I’ll 

take care of 

everything - you 

just stand aside

She has to understand 

that the both of us 

will fully satisfy her 

And for that, you 

must seduce her 

Seduce 

her…. 

If she refuses, I 

still have those 

pictures of her 

and Anita, naked 

I think I may 

threaten to post 

them online 

Meanwhile, at the police station 

Frank, don’t forget that 

I’m waiting for Patrice 

Morillon’s bodyguard

And I am waiting 

to caress your body 

uninhibited, Anita 

You are a sex 

maniac Frank, 

watch out… 

You wouldn’t want me to file 

a sexual harassment claim 

against you, would you? 

Because I could do it! 

Oh, Captain!

Without fail, Jess is exactly where they expected her to be. Pete and 

Dan are going to be able to put their little plan into action 

Excellent! 

Yay! 

Great!

Darling, do you remember Dan? 

Oh wow, she’s 

beautiful, she’s 

beautiful, she’s 

beautiful 

Hello 

you 

Hi Jess 

You know, he’d 

really like to 

get to know you 

better. We could have 

some good times, all 

Yeah, he broke 

my rib the last 

time we met 

three of us, if you catch 

my drift 

You know Jess, it may be better 

for you to agree to this, because 

you know that I still have those 

compromising pictures that you 

wouldn’t like me to spread about 

It’s not blackmail, I just think 

that you should open yourself up 

to new experiences, and that you 

have the potential for this 

Are you 

blackmailing me? 

The potential?

Oh come on, 

Jess, it was 

only a joke! 

so? 

Don’t be ridiculous, your 

proposition disgusts me! 

To hell with 

you both! 

so? 

I thought it 

went well - I 

stayed out of it

Hold on, 

we’ll try 

again 

She finds me 

silly, right? 

Dan, 

relax 

Maybe Anita put ideas 

into her head 

Such as the fact 

that I have a 

tiny penis 

The next day 

..given all 

you’ve told me 

already 

Of course, Anita, 

what did you think? 

so you refused?

It’s absolutely 

disgusting! 

Tell me the truth 

Jess: if you didn’t know 

about Dan’s problem 

You would 

have accepted 

Right? 

Over at Jess’ parents’: 

It’s noon, Marc

Why...why are you using this 

tone Wendy? I’ll remind 

you that I’m on vacation! 

I work 11 months a year at the 

grocery - I’d also like to remind 

you that without my salary you 

wouldn’t be able to parade about in 

your mohair sweaters 

That doesn’t 

explain why you 

had to come home 

at 4 a.m 

You’re changing the 

subject rather well, 

Marc

Wendy, what are you 

insinuating? And what 

did you put in my coffee? 

If you’re trying to poison 

me with fuel, it would be 

absolutely ridiculous 

At the grocer’s, Anita visits Pete 

Hi Pete 

Hi Anita 

I was with Jess a 

moment ago, she 

told me everything 

You’re saying that, but I 

know that you were up 

for a threesome too 

You know, it 

was Dan’s idea

Especially since you used 

to date guys in college 

-- Dan told me that Don’t worry, Jess doesn’t know 

about it. But tell me, do the 

pictures you want to show the 

world turn you on? 

I’d like to remind you that 

I’m a cop, and if I were you, 

I’d find other things to 

amuse myself with 

Anyway, I gave 

the photos to Dan

so make sure to get 

them back as fast as 

possible, and apologize 

to Jess before I tell 

her about your past 

That one’s really bossy 

No later than that evening, Pete invites Jess to dinner 

Are you mad 

at me? 

Oh Jess 

I don’t know

humf 

How to put it? 

I think I really 

go for you, Jess

The next day 

At the station, Frank and Anita are training:

The exercise 

does me good! 

I think we can safely 

say that I beat you hands 

down, Frank! 

You know what else 

does you good..

I’m not interested Frank. I’ve 

already told you, we’re just 

colleagues, no more, no less. 

And I have 

something really 

special for you 

You know that I 

totally want you 

Meanwhile, at the grocery…

I’m gonna kill 

you, you bastard 

to be continued

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Published by: 

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November Paynter 

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Taha Taha 

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Nadim Tarazi 

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Printed in Beirut by Dots Printing Press 

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2008 

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