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H O R O S C O P E S
by Kosmic Karen
ARIES (Mar 21 - Apr 19) Oy!
Get over yourself already. You are
at odds and feel misplaced and
you do not understand why. The
answer is simple, your polar opposite,
Libra, is ruling the heavens.
Relax, you’ll be fine and in six
months it will be your time to roar
once again. If you are feeling sad and lonely, go snuggle up with
a Leo, you are made for each other.
TAUR
URUS
US (Apr 20 - May 20) Use your stubborn streak to
accomplish things this month and stay out of debates. You will
lose! Normally one of the beautiful people, you are not used to
not getting attention. It’s okay, by November, you will be front
and center once more.
GEMINI (May 21 - June 20) Nothing ventured nothing
gained. It is a great time to enroll in colleges courses that start in
January. Stick to the humanities, science is not your shtick. You
are in desperate need of something new. Go shopping.
CANCER (June 21 - July 22) Be careful when chopping
wood for your autumn and winter fires, you are vulnerable to
injuries in October. It is also time for your annual physical.
Something has been eating away at you, but it is minor and it will
pass.
LEO (July 23 - Aug 22) “Take a walk on the wild side” is not
advice you normally need. Buy an absolutely outrageous Halloween
costume and have a blast. Consider changing your hair
color since the summer sun altered it considerably. Your hair is
your “mane” asset.
VIRGO (Aug 23 - Sept 22) You should run for politics. Honest,
forthright, hardworking, diligent….need I say more…..is just
what this country needs. While you may not be running in this
election, consider it for next year and by all means, work the
polls this November.
LIBRA (Sept 23 - Oct 22) Such a sweet-natured sign, let your
hair down. Tie one on for your birthday. Many people love you
and want to celebrate with you. You subdued nature sometimes
sends them a mixed message, however. Knock it off and let us
worship you.
SCORPIO (Oct 23 - Nov 21) Life is good for you, especially
on October 28th. Get back to basics is good advice, but do not
take any breaks from your main love, art. You are extraordinarily
artistic. Redo your bedroom…..better yet, redo someone
else’s.
SAGITT
GITTARIUS
(Nov 22 - Dec 21) You are sitting in the
southern sky these days waiting for your day in the sun. Be
patient. Start a diet now so you can fit into the perfect corset by
LIBRA FOCUS
Libra, Happy Birthday and get ready for a fun time.
You have been patient as of late, but your patience
and ability to love unconditionally will pay off this
month, albeit not likely till the end of October. You
are toying with many changes and attitudes lately,
and no one does that better than you. You are eventempered
through the most heated debates and
schisms and can find good in someone when no
one else can. You have felt a certain loneliness as
of late, but that will all change by October 28th with
the lunar eclipse, the last of its kind until 2007. The
lunar eclipse is often misunderstood
as a death of something, but whenever
there is a death, it only opens
the door for a new birth. You are in
love, now just open the door so that
special person knows they can enter,
then let nature take its course.
Libra Vibe. A perfect balance. Libra’s are
known for their debating skills, but both
sides of the scales will agree that this beautifully
smooth silicone vibrator from
Germany will bring justice to your piece.
Whether you choose to rub it in the front,
or plunge it into the back you can vibe
with the cosmos visit the stars!
December. A little self-indulgent, the summer picnics are a thing
of the past, concentrate on self-improvement.
CAPRICORN (Dec 22 - Jan 19) You are at odds in business
in early October, a truly freaky occurrence, but it will resolve by
October 10th, I promise. Not the most romantic of signs, you
forgot how to respond to flirtations. Flirt right back. You can be
the most passionate lover if you allow it. Make reservations for
dinner for two in late October, and I want details afterwards.
AQUARIUS
ARIUS (Jan 20 - Feb 18) Go as your favorite politician
to the Halloween Party. Did you know that the two most common
signs for past presidents are Aquarius and Capricorn? It
makes sense too, the humanitarian and the businessman do well
in public life. It is a low-key autumn for you. May I suggest a
good novel?
PISCES (Feb 19 - March 20) Quiet frolicking is your lot in
life for the next few weeks. A former lover tries to reconnect,
but you are very leery. Good, you should be! Make them prove
they are worth another try. You are too generous and kind for
your own good at times. Take long walks in the early evening
and ponder the universe. Look to the southern skies for a brilliant
display.
18 pm 2.9 — 10/04