Last Minute - The Lethbridge Journal
Last Minute - The Lethbridge Journal Last Minute - The Lethbridge Journal
Submitted to the Lethbridge Journal Bugs in my Teeth Roaring up to our house on his unregistered, single-seat dirt bike, the boy handed me a battered, sweat-stained and smelly helmet so large it swam about wildly on my head. Avoiding authorities, we raced through alleyways back to his family’s home and motorcycle business near Hardieville, then further north to what seemed to me an impossibly steep coulee where the emerging sport of ‘motorcycle hillclimbing’ events were held. The wild ride through alleys, watching young riders on the hill; it was thrilling. . . right up until I seared the day into both my memory and my calf by leaning against the hot motorcycle muffler. I was a foolish young girl dressed to “be seen,” not safe and had worn shorts and sandals; never a stellar decision for any motorcycle rider. The scar remained for years along with a seed of passion that had been planted in my mind. My adolescent endorphins raged when at age 13 I threw my leg over a motorcycle seat that first time; a 14-year-old boy I knew from school asked me to go for a ride. Imagine, a boy wanted to spend time with me; I was bursting with anticipation! Thirty years later, it all became campfire teasing when Brian and I were camping with friends in the Kananaskis. My childhood friend, that 14-year-old boy’s wife of 20-odd years, introduced me to her teenage children as their dad’s “first ummm. . . ahhh. . . girlfriend.” In someone’s stories that single sunny afternoon we spent on the hill had attained ‘girlfriend’ status but without knowing, the boy had left a life-long passion for two wheels, speed and independence in my young mind. Soon after, Sunday afternoons would find Dad, my brother and I at the hill watching what I considered ‘Kamikaze’ riders with deep-rooted death wishes. From standing still they’d rev up their bikes to ear-splitting levels, then release brake and clutch, spitting roost (dirt and rocks) nine meters back, five meters high. Digging deep and fighting gravity to remain straight, they’d battle up the 60-degree slope hoping to launch over the top, 25 meters distant. Spectators perched like crows on hoods of vehicles crowded together at the brink. Watching the big bikes hurtling over the top, I feared riders would lose control and smash right into us. My brother and I constantly ignored Dad’s warnings not to fight for coveted viewing position. Balanced on the center of the truck hood the winner would tightly grip the hood ornament between their thighs to avoid sliding off the sharp-sloped hood as the losers constantly did. Finally attaining my goal one day, my triumph was short-lived; grabbing me by both ankles, my brother yanked me right off the hood. My scream was audible even over the deafening bikes. Blood streamed from the gash the hood ornament left; pain was so distracting I couldn’t even enjoy the scathing tongue lashing Dad rained down on my brother. . . and hill climbing was off our Sunday calendar. Stupid brother! The bike was black, low to the ground, producing bodynumbing vibration for the entire 40,000 kms we rode on my ex’s ‘71 Harley Davidson. I rode behind; forced to crane my neck sideways to see or speak (read YELL) but also to avoid breaking my nose and teeth on his helmet as he shifted gears. At the time, windshields on Harleys were passé; the only economically viable face protectors were plastic shields that snapped onto helmets, caught wind gusts and tore at neck muscles. Foul insects, bees and grasshoppers spread bitter yellow innards as they felt like rocks exploding on our faces, teeth or helmets. Only on occasion would they fly into a mouth or even the back of a throat creating equally distasteful choices. Choice 1 - Cough to dislodge and expel critter, possibly triggering involuntary chewing (eeeeuuuuwwww). Choice 2 - Attempt to swallow as wind-parched throat chokes back rising bile, simultaneously attempting to disregard scrambling feet or wings. Note to self: keep mouth shut. Getting on the bike was challenging. The narrow, lightly padded seat ended with two 16-cm tall chrome sissybars (backrests) that often cut my legs when slinging them over the sharp bars. Lacking saddlebags, for years I carried a backpack crammed full of heavy tools and personal gear. The extra 12 kilo’s together with constant motor vibration dictated very frequent roadside ‘numbbum’ stops but I tried to look at the bright side. Balancing weight of the pack against wind resistance was an all-day sit-down abdominal workout and you could bounce a basketball off my belly. Don’t misunderstand. B-C (before-children) I loved adventuring through Alberta, B.C., Washington and Montana whenever possible. To me few things beat exploring new pathways till you run out of day, setting up a tent almost anywhere, then looking for a restaurant with motorcycles parked out front where we’d meet other bikers (ages 18 to 80) from across North America and beyond. Bikers are their own international nationality. Barring snobbish manufacturer loyalties spawning verbal jabs, bikers are extraordinarily non-judgmental. When need arises, 99 per cent of bikers are quick to provide mechanical assistance, food or shelter, offering friendship and camaraderie without question. Self proclaimed “one percenters” are easily identifiable jacket and patch-wearing gang members. Note to self: be careful who you ask for tent site advice. Sun-baked hills, much like our coulees, escort the highway as you enter the “bustling village” of Cache Creek B.C. Our bartender hooted with laughter when we told him where on those hills we’d set up, on advice from the young man working at the local gas stop. Choking back giggles he described the multiple sacks of squirming rattlesnakes he’d helped remove from that very same area a day prior. Rather enjoying our alarm, he calmly handed us keys to his pick-up truck, calling over a few nearby bikers who quickly helped us move to a more hospitable site “before your tent fills up with rattlers,” he snickered. Eventually purchasing my own BMW, I confirmed firsthand the intense concentration required to stay alive on two wheels. Strangely, some ‘cage’ (car) drivers don’t see motorcycles. Perhaps accustomed to watching for other four-wheel vehicles, some can have a blind spot for bikes. I was once totally dumbfounded when a car driver made direct eye contact with me, then immediately pulled out to turn left, 12 meters in front of my approaching motorcycle. Unfortunately bikers must ‘drive’ not only for themselves but for all others on the roads. In a contest between me, then a 54-kilo rider and a 1,500- kilo vehicle plus all that unforgiving pavement, I will lose. . . badly. Even so, when circumstance allows I hope to replace the motorcycle I enjoyed for years. That seed of motorcycle passion planted so long ago still simmers with my desire to explore. From where we live, within just a few hours you can experience prairie, desert, foothill and mountain landscapes. Investing a few hours more, you can reach the west coast to ride incredible twisting coastal highways with their stunning backdrops. Today’s comfortable helmets and riding gear provide full face and body protection and with motorcycle windshields now both effective and stylish, experiencing bugs in my teeth is just a fond (!!??!!) memory. • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • •• 4 LETHBRIDGE JOURNAL • WEEK OF MAY 11, 2012 • www.lethbridgejournal.ca
ARIES (March 21-April 19) Greet each new day is if it were your last: Make a cheeseburger out of two smaller cheeseburgers and chain-smoke while pumping your gas. What are you living for anyways, the FUTURE? Everybody knows in the future we’ll all be murdered by robots. TAURUS (April 20-May 20) All of your endeavours this week will be more successful if you include a guitar solo. If you can’t find one you like, just grab a guitar and go all Van Halen on it. People will find you more attractive, things will cost less, and people you don’t know will stop by to beg for an autograph. That’s the power of music, my friend. GEMINI (May 21-June 20) You’ll have a run-in with a mysterious stranger at the 13 Street Tim Hortons and accidentally swap cell phones. Now here’s the thing: there’s, like, a 75 per cent chance it’ll be a secret agent and you’ll get embroiled in an international conspiracy. The other 25 per cent? The phone belongs to a sex pervert. Those are better-than-average odds. CANCER (June 21-July 22) You will be awarded the Nobel Prize in Flavour for your doctoral thesis on the origin of the Buffalo Wing, which is not derived from buffalo meat as scientists initially believed but is rather named after its inventor, M. Bison. LEO (July 23-Aug 22) You are not alone in your fight: one in 15 Canadians were extremely confused by John Travolta in the movie Hairspray, and if everybody donates just $12 to the Edna Turnblad Foundation we can find a cure VIRGO (Aug 23-Sept 22) Normally I would absolutely advise you to put your career first, but “Guy Holding The Little Caesars Sign” isn’t really a career. Although I guess it’s probably more of a career than “Freelance Writer,” so take this one with a grain of salt. LIBRA (Sept 23-Oct 22) Make sure you keep your brand new Xbox 360 with Kinect in a room with a high ceiling, because those little square tiles made of compressed dust you have in your family room don’t put up much of a fight when you really get into the game. SCORPIO (Oct 23-Nov 21) I feel like I shouldn’t have to point this out in this day and age, but it’s a really bad idea to be teaching your kids ‘Duck and Cover’ techniques in case of nuclear attack. First off, everybody figured out that if you’re in the blast zone you’re history, under a desk or not. Second, the Cold War is over. We won! Russia has Coca Cola and a thriving porn industry, they’re like Americans with funny accents and a drinking problem now. SAGITTARIUS (Nov 22-Dec 21) Fear is the only thing keeping you from achieving your goals. Werewolves aren’t real, and while the Illuminati ARE, they have much more important business to attend to right now than your future position as President of Canada. Which is actually something else we need to discuss… C A P R I - CORN (Dec 22- Jan 19) School has Walk right in. Sit right down. sutton group - lethbridge 403-320-6411 been a major source of stress in your life lately, but that’s no reason to break down crying every time you hear the words ‘exam’ and ‘study’ unless they’re referring to an uncomfortable medical procedure. Blow off the pressure by learning something worth knowing, like how to hack school databases and ruin the grading curve. AQUARIUS (Jan 20-Feb 18) The average Aquarius has an affinity for water where the other signs do not, except I guess Pisces and maybe Cancer. Anyways, my point is that you don’t share that affinity for some reason so bring along some water wings next time you hit the pool. That way, you won’t drown and ruin the already-shaky reputation of public swimming pools. PISCES (Feb 19-Mar 20) Part of the reason you’re having trouble finding work may have something to do with the results that come up when prospective employers Google your name. Things like “Beer Bong Champion, Eight Years Running” don’t scream ‘Senior VP in Sales’ for some reason, although depending on the company I guess that could be an asset too. Birthday Baby... Birthday cake as we know it is actually relatively recent, and was originally available almost exclusively to the very wealthy. So, despite your crippling debt and questionable future full of resource wars, just remember that to a kid in the 19th century you are living like a KING. Ron Lagemaat REALTOR ® rlagemaat@sutton.com www.sutton.com/realtor/rlagemaat 66 HARVARD CRES. W. $ 289,900 MLS 20122139 836 STAFFORD DR. N. $ 189,900 MLS 20120022 Highlands Blvd West TD Angus Road West Save-On Foods ATB Argyll Road West Shoppers Drug Mart University Drive Enjoy a nice park view in rear. Elegant 2 storey features vaulted ceiling in master bedroom and living room. Large kitchen, 4 bathrooms, 3 bedrooms, main floor laundry, 2 fireplaces. Simply a must see! 1144 43 AVENUE N. $ 178,000 Excellent starter home or revenue property. Large yard, loads of parking, recently upgraded, new kitchen, bathrooms, some windows. Developed basement with bedroom, den, bathroom, family room. 2 bedrooms up. New shingles 2012! 4.79 ACRES SOUTH OF NOBLEFORD $ 449,000 Highlands Road West Home HDW MLS 20121665 MLS 20121511 Safeway GREAT CLIPS – WEST LETHBRIDGE #2, 405 Highlands Blvd W. Lethbridge, AB T1J 5E8 403-327-2255 Hours: M-F 9-9; Sat. 9-6; Sun. 11-5 This cozy Northside bungalow has a backyard that never ends (160 ft)! Two bedrooms up, finished downstairs with bedroom, bathroom and large family room. Super single garage (16x24). Quiet neighborhood, playground just down the block. 614 COULEESPRINGS CRES. S. $ 379,900 MLS 20121851 True country-style living, with all the space you could possibly need. Huge 40x100 shop for any usage. Great views of mountains & farmlands. Just a short drive to Lethbridge. The acreage you’ve always wanted. 47 UPLANDS BLVD. N. $ 299,900 MLS 20121176 $ 6 .99 plus tax haircut offer expires: June 8, 2012 Not valid with any other offers. Limit one coupon per customer. Good only at West Lethbridge. Spectacular 4 bedroom bi-level in Southgate. Two bedrooms + 4pce bath above attached double garage. Total of 3 full baths. This Galko built home has fabulous vaulted ceilings in the open kitchen/dining/living room area. Gas fireplace feature in huge family room downstairs. Fenced yard, landscaping is complete. Over 1400 sq. ft. of awesomeness! 420 52 AVENUE COALHURST $ 189,900 2+2 bedroom bungalow moved onto new basement in 1992. Roof done in 2009, windows in 2008. Hardwood floors, large lot. Close to schools. Great value! Real Estate Done Right! This 1128 sq. ft. bi-level is ready for your family to enjoy. 3 beds up, 1 down, great kitchen, quality hardwood flooring, large family room. Attached double garage, A/C, built-in vac, U/G sprinklers in front yard, very convenient Uplands location. BUSINESS OPPORTUNITY 41068453 403-393-5582 • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • LETHBRIDGE JOURNAL • WEEK OF MAY 11, 2012 • www.lethbridgejournal.ca 15 MLS 20125763 $ 85,000 OR BEST OFFER! Turn key liquor store. High traffic location. CALL RON TODAY!
- Page 1 and 2: FEATURE STORY Linda’s heart is in
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ARIES (March 21-April 19)<br />
Greet each new day is if it were<br />
your last: Make a cheeseburger<br />
out of two smaller cheeseburgers<br />
and chain-smoke while pumping<br />
your gas. What are you living for<br />
anyways, the FUTURE? Everybody<br />
knows in the future we’ll all<br />
be murdered by robots.<br />
TAURUS (April 20-May 20)<br />
All of your endeavours this<br />
week will be more successful if<br />
you include a guitar solo. If you<br />
can’t find one you like, just grab<br />
a guitar and go all Van Halen on<br />
it. People will find you more attractive,<br />
things will cost less, and<br />
people you don’t know will stop<br />
by to beg for an autograph. That’s<br />
the power of music, my friend.<br />
GEMINI (May 21-June 20)<br />
You’ll have a run-in with a<br />
mysterious stranger at the 13<br />
Street Tim Hortons and accidentally<br />
swap cell phones. Now<br />
here’s the thing: there’s, like, a 75<br />
per cent chance it’ll be a secret<br />
agent and you’ll get embroiled in<br />
an international conspiracy. <strong>The</strong><br />
other 25 per cent? <strong>The</strong> phone belongs<br />
to a sex pervert. Those are<br />
better-than-average odds.<br />
CANCER (June 21-July 22)<br />
You will be awarded the Nobel<br />
Prize in Flavour for your doctoral<br />
thesis on the origin of the Buffalo<br />
Wing, which is not derived from<br />
buffalo meat as scientists initially<br />
believed but is rather named after<br />
its inventor, M. Bison.<br />
LEO (July 23-Aug 22)<br />
You are not alone in your<br />
fight: one in 15 Canadians were<br />
extremely confused by John Travolta<br />
in the movie Hairspray, and<br />
if everybody donates just $12 to<br />
the Edna Turnblad Foundation<br />
we can find a cure<br />
VIRGO (Aug 23-Sept 22)<br />
Normally I would absolutely<br />
advise you to put your career<br />
first, but “Guy Holding <strong>The</strong> Little<br />
Caesars Sign” isn’t really a career.<br />
Although I guess it’s probably<br />
more of a career than “Freelance<br />
Writer,” so take this one with a<br />
grain of salt.<br />
LIBRA (Sept 23-Oct 22)<br />
Make sure you keep your<br />
brand new Xbox 360 with Kinect<br />
in a room with a high ceiling,<br />
because those little square tiles<br />
made of compressed dust you<br />
have in your family room don’t<br />
put up much of a fight when you<br />
really get into the game.<br />
SCORPIO (Oct 23-Nov 21)<br />
I feel like I shouldn’t have to<br />
point this out in this day and<br />
age, but it’s a really bad idea to<br />
be teaching your kids ‘Duck and<br />
Cover’ techniques in case of nuclear<br />
attack. First off, everybody<br />
figured out that if you’re in the<br />
blast zone you’re history, under<br />
a desk or not. Second, the Cold<br />
War is over. We won! Russia has<br />
Coca Cola and a thriving porn<br />
industry, they’re like Americans<br />
with funny accents and a drinking<br />
problem now.<br />
SAGITTARIUS (Nov 22-Dec<br />
21)<br />
Fear is the only thing keeping<br />
you from achieving your goals.<br />
Werewolves aren’t real, and while<br />
the Illuminati ARE, they have<br />
much more important business<br />
to attend to right now than your<br />
future position as President of<br />
Canada. Which is actually something<br />
else we need to discuss…<br />
C A P R I -<br />
CORN (Dec 22-<br />
Jan 19)<br />
School has<br />
Walk right in.<br />
Sit right down.<br />
sutton group -<br />
lethbridge<br />
403-320-6411<br />
been a major source of stress<br />
in your life lately, but that’s no<br />
reason to break down crying<br />
every time you hear the words<br />
‘exam’ and ‘study’ unless they’re<br />
referring to an uncomfortable<br />
medical procedure. Blow off the<br />
pressure by learning something<br />
worth knowing, like how to hack<br />
school databases and ruin the<br />
grading curve.<br />
AQUARIUS (Jan 20-Feb 18)<br />
<strong>The</strong> average Aquarius has an<br />
affinity for water where the other<br />
signs do not, except I guess Pisces<br />
and maybe Cancer. Anyways, my<br />
point is that you don’t share that<br />
affinity for some reason so bring<br />
along some water wings next<br />
time you hit the pool. That way,<br />
you won’t drown and ruin the already-shaky<br />
reputation of public<br />
swimming pools.<br />
PISCES (Feb 19-Mar 20)<br />
Part of the reason you’re having<br />
trouble finding work may<br />
have something to do with the<br />
results that come up when prospective<br />
employers Google your<br />
name. Things like “Beer Bong<br />
Champion, Eight Years Running”<br />
don’t scream ‘Senior VP in Sales’<br />
for some reason, although depending<br />
on the company I guess<br />
that could be an asset too.<br />
Birthday<br />
Baby...<br />
Birthday cake as we know it<br />
is actually relatively recent,<br />
and was originally available<br />
almost exclusively to the<br />
very wealthy. So, despite<br />
your crippling debt and<br />
questionable future full of<br />
resource wars, just remember<br />
that to a kid in the 19th<br />
century you are living like a<br />
KING.<br />
Ron Lagemaat<br />
REALTOR ®<br />
rlagemaat@sutton.com<br />
www.sutton.com/realtor/rlagemaat<br />
66 HARVARD CRES. W.<br />
$<br />
289,900<br />
MLS 20122139<br />
836 STAFFORD DR. N.<br />
$<br />
189,900<br />
MLS 20120022<br />
Highlands Blvd West<br />
TD<br />
Angus Road West<br />
Save-On Foods<br />
ATB<br />
Argyll Road West<br />
Shoppers<br />
Drug Mart<br />
University Drive<br />
Enjoy a nice park view in rear. Elegant 2 storey features vaulted ceiling in<br />
master bedroom and living room. Large kitchen, 4 bathrooms, 3 bedrooms,<br />
main floor laundry, 2 fireplaces. Simply a must see!<br />
1144 43 AVENUE N.<br />
$<br />
178,000<br />
Excellent starter home or revenue property. Large yard, loads of parking,<br />
recently upgraded, new kitchen, bathrooms, some windows. Developed<br />
basement with bedroom, den, bathroom, family room. 2 bedrooms up.<br />
New shingles 2012!<br />
4.79 ACRES SOUTH OF<br />
NOBLEFORD<br />
$<br />
449,000<br />
Highlands Road West<br />
Home HDW<br />
MLS 20121665<br />
MLS 20121511<br />
Safeway<br />
GREAT CLIPS – WEST LETHBRIDGE<br />
#2, 405 Highlands Blvd W.<br />
<strong>Lethbridge</strong>, AB T1J 5E8<br />
403-327-2255<br />
Hours: M-F 9-9; Sat. 9-6; Sun. 11-5<br />
This cozy Northside bungalow has a backyard that never ends (160 ft)! Two<br />
bedrooms up, finished downstairs with bedroom, bathroom and large family<br />
room. Super single garage (16x24). Quiet neighborhood, playground just down<br />
the block.<br />
614 COULEESPRINGS CRES. S.<br />
$<br />
379,900<br />
MLS 20121851<br />
True country-style living, with all the space you could possibly need.<br />
Huge 40x100 shop for any usage. Great views of mountains &<br />
farmlands. Just a short drive to <strong>Lethbridge</strong>.<br />
<strong>The</strong> acreage you’ve always wanted.<br />
47 UPLANDS BLVD. N.<br />
$<br />
299,900<br />
MLS 20121176<br />
$<br />
6 .99<br />
plus tax<br />
haircut<br />
offer expires: June 8, 2012<br />
Not valid with any other offers. Limit one coupon<br />
per customer. Good only at West <strong>Lethbridge</strong>.<br />
Spectacular 4 bedroom bi-level in Southgate. Two bedrooms + 4pce bath above attached<br />
double garage. Total of 3 full baths. This Galko built home has fabulous vaulted ceilings<br />
in the open kitchen/dining/living room area. Gas fireplace feature in huge family room<br />
downstairs. Fenced yard, landscaping is complete. Over 1400 sq. ft. of awesomeness!<br />
420 52 AVENUE COALHURST<br />
$<br />
189,900<br />
2+2 bedroom bungalow moved onto new basement in 1992.<br />
Roof done in 2009, windows in 2008. Hardwood floors, large<br />
lot. Close to schools. Great value!<br />
Real Estate Done Right!<br />
This 1128 sq. ft. bi-level is ready for your family to enjoy. 3<br />
beds up, 1 down, great kitchen, quality hardwood flooring, large<br />
family room. Attached double garage, A/C, built-in vac, U/G<br />
sprinklers in front yard, very convenient Uplands location.<br />
BUSINESS OPPORTUNITY<br />
41068453<br />
403-393-5582<br />
• • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • •<br />
LETHBRIDGE JOURNAL • WEEK OF MAY 11, 2012 • www.lethbridgejournal.ca 15<br />
MLS 20125763<br />
$<br />
85,000<br />
OR BEST<br />
OFFER!<br />
Turn key liquor<br />
store. High<br />
traffic location.<br />
CALL RON TODAY!
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