divine-mercy-in-my-soul

1084 Before every major grace, my soul undergoes a test of patience, for I feel the grace, but
do not yet possess it. My spirit burns with impatience, but the hour has not yet come.
These moments are so very extraordinary that it is difficult to describe them.
1085 April 13, 1937. Today I must stay in bed all day. I had a violent fit of coughing, which left
me so weak that I have no strength to walk. My spirit is eager to do God‟s work, but
physical strength has left me. I cannot penetrate Your actions at this moment, O Lord;
therefore, I keep repeating with a loving act of the will: Do with me as You please.
1086 Although the temptations are strong, a whole wave of doubts beats against my soul, and
discouragement stands by, ready to enter into the act. The Lord, however, strengthens
my will, against which all the attempts of the enemy are shattered as if against a rock. I
see how many actual graces God grants me; these support me ceaselessly. I am very
weak, and I attribute everything solely to the grace of God.
1087 + When one day I resolved to practice a certain virtue, I lapsed into the vice opposed to
that virtue ten times more frequently than on other days. In the evening, I was reflecting
on why, today, I had lapsed so extraordinarily, and I heard the words: You were
counting too much on yourself and too little on Me. And I understood the cause of
my lapses.
1088 (23) Sudden return of health.
After I had written a letter to Father Sopocko on Sunday, April 11, I suddenly became so
very ill that I did not send that letter, but waited for a clear sign of God‟s will. However,
my health got so bad that I had to go to bed. The Coughing racked me so much that it
seemed to me that, if this repeats a few more times, it will surely be the end of me.
1089 On April 14, I felt so bad that I barely managed to get up to assist at Holy Mass. I felt
much worse than I did at the time they sent me for treatment. There was wheezing, and
there were rattling noises in my lungs and strange pains. When I received Holy
Communion, I don‟t know why, but it was as if something were urging me to this prayer,
and I began to pray in this manner: “Jesus, may Your pure and healthy blood circulate in
my ailing organism, and may Your pure and healthy body transform my weak body, and
may a healthy and vigorous life throb within me, if it is truly Your holy will that I should set
about the work in question; and this will be a clear sign of Your holy will for me.”
As I was praying in this way, I suddenly felt as if something were jolting my whole
organism and, in an instant, I felt completely well. My breath is clear, as if there had
never been anything the matter with my lungs, and I feel no pain, and this is a sign for me
that I should set about the work.
1090 And this happened on the last day of my novena to the Holy Spirit. After this return to
health, I found myself united with the Lord Jesus in a purely spiritual way. Jesus gave me
strong assurances; that is, He confirmed me in respect to His demands. I remained close
to the Lord Jesus all that day and talked with Him about the details concerning that
congregation.
(24) Jesus infused my soul with power and courage to act. Now I understand that if the
Lord demands something of a soul, He gives it the means to carry it out, and through
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