For the happy man! - Collected writings DEPRESSION: Ed Atkins

More documents

Recommendations

Info

To ask such a question being tantamount to a very real demand for the exculpation of my EVERY SINGLE fucking responsibility. To you, in the main. The fuck happened. The thought of a single black line drawn with a brush made up of a single eyelash. The rarest kind of sable, etc. In black Indian ink, at the head of a penis – in one deft, tender stroke. Ermine tailed. Barely registered: the slightest titillation. The other hand supporting, similarly tenderly. The mark constituting a perfect double for the eyelash used to draw it; an eyelash grown backwards by the lover. Meaning: Meaning? –I didn’t think it would turn out this way (A line that should really be delivered with a perfect and matte indifference. Or not indifference but ambivalence. To reflect some sort of agnostic remove. As in, a ballot paper spoiled with an exquisite essay on the process of precipitation. Or an immaculately rendered drawing of the back of an unremarkable, bald head. Or filling the entire ballot with a black mirror of graphite, leaving nothing but the metal eraser cuff of the pencil. Hours in the voting booth, distantiating.)
The smell was certainly sexual, I think. I wanted to say that the smell was surely something originally sexual. That the smell, perhaps, made me feel sexual. As in aroused. Though clearly with some… posthumous aspect. From over there. As in: the memory of arousal. The echo of specific arousal. Remembering sex at work. While at work, I mean. And with a morbid growl. –Thinking of a defunct sex act. Sex with putrid caveats, rank rejoinders. More than the usual, of course. A residual stink, rather than something immanent. There’s some stale, mouldered undertones – a sporangial ground – right there. Either that or it’s the scent of LIVELY excretions from a pair of corpses in stultified congress. Or a pair of thick-set, crepuscular animals rutting. Black hair. Glandular, pheromonal and utterly shameless. Or the reek of some bundle of Neanderthal genitals: unkempt, ragged, swollen and tied off. Caked. Regardless: death – or rather, extinction – being explicit – being beside, beneath, on top of – the sex. One discolouring the other. Or making the other transparent with a perpetual expression of buttery grease. (Those gigantic, bluebottle-snaring eyelashes of elephants. As in, the ice-shagged, arachnid limbs of a crustacean.)
Page 3:
-- For the happy man! Collected wri
Page 8 and 9:
Minotaur 2013
Page 11 and 12:
Depressions
Page 13 and 14:
The proper work of a thumb lies in
Page 15:
are simply weapons for piercing the
Page 18 and 19:
Dear [...] This will be presented i
Page 20 and 21:
The repulsion of two-two fleshy mag
Page 22 and 23:
moons. Simply depressions, concave
Page 24 and 25:
forms to depress. A critique of dep
Page 26 and 27:
motor cortex (a plague), Gyrus (‘
Page 28 and 29:
ER! - Cuneus (the scene at the bott
Page 31 and 32: Or tears, of course 2013
Page 33 and 34: (Flat palm butts flat door - though
Page 35 and 36: tion is his own) O! - This always-a
Page 37 and 38: Else flattened by the interminable
Page 39 and 40: As in: light-like curves that pass
Page 41 and 42: Liquid crystals running terminal co
Page 43 and 44: the fuck away - and then STRAIGHTAW
Page 45 and 46: ness. I conjure the very medicine t
Page 48 and 49: Warm, Warm, Warm Spring Mouths 2013
Page 50 and 51: And no provision has been made for
Page 52 and 53: And this whole thing a concession,
Page 54 and 55: And it’s not too much to imagine
Page 56 and 57: And bullet-time, really, is a lifes
Page 58 and 59: gallon or so of PVA semen. Dispassi
Page 60 and 61: Inexpensive. Which is part of it, t
Page 62 and 63: This is no longer an experience, bu
Page 64 and 65: A heavy mood that turned away from
Page 66 and 67: (Is this thing on?) And a trellis o
Page 68 and 69: Into the cool water. This one goes
Page 70 and 71: This one goes out to your singular
Page 72: I don’t want to hear any news on
Page 75 and 76: I wanted to ask whether you thought
Page 77 and 78: legibility. A primordial story of s
Page 79: owner of the eyelash, your lover. B
Page 83 and 84: discrete line to slight-inked line
Page 85 and 86: oily substance not unlike jojoba, f
Page 87 and 88: muscles) Averting our eyes from one
Page 89 and 90: late to be a fucking lie told badly
Page 91 and 92: fingernail, most likely. Fingers re
Page 93 and 94: great prairies of skin are, in each
Page 95 and 96: the same mistake again. The dead ey
Page 97 and 98: -Resembling the lichen that seems t
Page 100 and 101: A tumour (in English) 2011
Page 102 and 103: punctuation and that peculiar synta
Page 104 and 105: and waning produces a horrific pull
Page 106 and 107: frozen, unknown. It’s not mine, t
Page 108 and 109: pink, marbled-looking veneer inspir
Page 110 and 111: notch at its highest point with a c
Page 112 and 113: [...] If it’s like this in the mo
Page 114 and 115: the crew: Fletcher, the navy techni
Page 116 and 117: scenes remind us that this isn’t
Page 118 and 119: Grotesque, just like this text here
Page 120 and 121: The tumour, spanning many acres now
Page 122 and 123: TEETH, and a battle is pitched betw
Page 124 and 125: A cave again, this time somewhere i
Page 126 and 127: The underside of a banana slug. The
Page 128 and 129: taxidermist, so as to preserve its
Page 130 and 131:
a golf ball. I fucking hate golf, y
Page 132 and 133:
As previously discussed elsewhere,
Page 134 and 135:
varieties: RODS AND CONES (rods of
Page 136 and 137:
Feel its tentacular motion inside y
Page 138 and 139:
droxyurea, Hydrea, Idarubicin, Idam
Page 140 and 141:
of blasé humanity writhing happily
Page 143 and 144:
Do it 2013
Page 145:
Graciousness - hospitality at all c
Page 148 and 149:
- My daughter says she loves to ice
Page 150 and 151:
Or remembering thinking: I used to
Page 152 and 153:
Or the admission that I bought a kn
Page 154 and 155:
Or the gap in the journal here. A f
Page 156 and 157:
Or someone once writing something a
Page 158 and 159:
Or that an index of absence is a so
Page 160 and 161:
Or something like that. Diminished
Page 162 and 163:
gler, to be precise - on to the arm
Page 164 and 165:
Or the too-late comprehension that
Page 166 and 167:
Or there’s THIS, off the TOP OF M
Page 168 and 169:
tralaminar nuclear group (baffled a
Page 170 and 171:
incerta (lopsided), PITUITARY GLAND
Page 172 and 173:
have - the other seemingly a king o
Page 174 and 175:
The brute indomitability of a list.
Page 176 and 177:
Or a massive tattoo of a shark bite
Page 178 and 179:
Or, to focus a little, the reptilia
Page 180 and 181:
Or, that we are not limited to verb
Page 182 and 183:
Or perhaps it’s more useful to be
Page 184 and 185:
Or... I suppose. False positives an
Page 186 and 187:
Or confiding that the head eventual
Page 188 and 189:
Or you climb the dangling rope left
Page 190 and 191:
Or a diagonal movement across bus s
Page 192 and 193:
Or being an aggravation of the exis
Page 194 and 195:
Or again, in 2012, albeit INTERNALL
Page 197 and 198:
Three shorts 2012 - 13
Page 199 and 200:
jaw, eight twice, From what I can m
Page 201 and 202:
of fecklessness and animal despair.
Page 203 and 204:
ing the problem. We’ll shave arou
Page 205:
Horse-head or Triangulum Emission G
Page 215:
Meringue 2011
Page 313 and 314:
Somebody’s baby boy
Page 315:
Somebody’s Baby Boy, half dead, s
Page 318 and 319:
[...] Can you smell that? (*RUMMAGE
Page 320 and 321:
like skull; your skull is more poro
Page 322 and 323:
those trapdoor spiders - those trap
Page 324 and 325:
piss-stream. The ones that hook-on
Page 326 and 327:
channels. Purposeless. The stuff I
Page 328 and 329:
whistling, singing - whatever it is
Page 331 and 332:
Air for concrete 2011
Page 333 and 334:
mouth. Do you even have a mouth? [.
Page 335 and 336:
[…] I’m sure you can picture as
Page 337 and 338:
ody’s. Microscopic flakes of Leon
Page 339 and 340:
ody. […] Surrounded by gratuitous
Page 341 and 342:
Your father’s horrific sunglasses
Page 343 and 344:
horizon from the window of a double
Page 345 and 346:
a click, looks up towards the ossif
Page 347:
impunity, fearlessly, expressively!
Page 352 and 353:
450You, standing DUMBSTRUCK in a be
Page 354 and 355:
within the hole. 1(These things, ag
Page 356 and 357:
40,000 ADThe patron saint of atroph
Page 358 and 359:
seems so phenomenally archaic as to
Page 360 and 361:
patron saint of poets and refugees,
Page 362 and 363:
valued member of the team’. A ton
Page 364 and 365:
1372A polytheism that describes the
Page 366:
with his right. The words he uses,
Page 370:
© Ed Atkins 2013 -- For the happy
show all

For the happy man! - Collected writings DEPRESSION: Ed Atkins

You also want an ePaper? Increase the reach of your titles

Delete template?

Save as template?