For the happy man! - Collected writings DEPRESSION: Ed Atkins

For the happy man! - Collected writings DEPRESSION: Ed Atkins For the happy man! - Collected writings DEPRESSION: Ed Atkins

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A tumour (in English) 2011

Align towards the spine [...] Then he said: ‘Reading this text will conjure a tumour inside you. It will ma- terialise within your colon (or perhaps your wet brain, or your left kidney, or tucked be- neath your right testicle – cluster- ing inside your ovaries, your pitui- tary, your breast, etc. (His parenthetical tone as if suppressing a BURP)), and it will do so as a direct result of your having read this.’ Adding: ‘The dimensions of the tumour will be exactly proportional to the amount of the text that you read. A microscopic kernel of tumourous tissue has already shuddered into being because you have stubbornly read this far; every word, every letter, swells the tumour – according to the size, shape and etymology of the word, not to mention the role within the structure of the surrounding sentence, paragraph. Typographic affectation will also EFFECT the proliferation of the tumour, as will the injudicious use of

A tumour (in English)<br />

2011

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