A CAUSE TO FIGHT FOR - The Jesus Army

Gordon and Jenny relax at Promise House where they live with a large “family” of Christian brothers and sisters
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“We did lots of crying together and came
through to do lots of laughing, determined
not to look inward at ourselves but to look
outward and see a bigger picture.”
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said ‘prayer’ she’d immediately say ‘Head! Head!’ meaning
we should lay hands on her for healing.”
“One Sunday, as I held up a toy, I realised – just like
Stevie’s last months – she couldn’t see. Her last weeks
she spent more or less asleep. In the early hours of St
Patrick’s Day, 17 March 1985, she died.”
After Rachel’s death, Gordon and Jenny describe the
“mix of things” they went through.
“At first I descended into self-pity,” says Jenny. “A
visitor innocently asked if we had children. I answered
sharply ‘Well, I did have.’ They were terribly upset,
devastated that unwittingly she’d touched such a raw
nerve. Later, after I’d put it right, we struck up quite a
friendship. I learnt the hard way that self-pity is never an
option, however justified it seems.”
“Yes, we grieved terribly for our children,” says Gordon.
“But it was our faith to see God in it all. We’d just
moved to be involved with the community; we were both
starting to realise that God had a much bigger purpose
than we’d first reckoned. We refused to blame God.
Instead, we said to Him: ‘You’ve chosen to take these
little ones to Yourself early. Nothing in Your purposes is
wasted or lost. You’ve given us this pain and grief to carry
but what are You going to do with it?
“Life is often hard and God wants to be alongside us in
it all. Father God knew the pain of deliberately sending
His Son to die for us. Jenny and I, through our own
loss, got to know something of that pain. We did lots of
crying together and came through to do lots of laughing,
determined not to look inward at ourselves but to look
outward and see a bigger picture.”
Gordon and Jenny now began to explore that “bigger
picture”: they moved into community in 1986, later
moving to a larger house in Coventry. There they have
been “mum and dad” for the last 15 years to a household
of around 20 people – and a constant stream
of visitors.
“Life has so much going for us here, “says Jenny.
“We’d otherwise have lived very small, isolated lives together,
especially after the death of our children. I’d have
been rigid and strict, not able to think on my feet and
adjust accordingly. Instead, we’re involved with so many
people! Community has mellowed me and – most of the
time! – I love it. Losing Stevie and Rachel has given us,
not exactly a specific ministry, but vulnerability before
God and sensitivity to reach out to other families when
they’re in trouble.”
“When our children died, finding God was difficult,”
says Gordon. “There was no escaping it, but we were in
it together and the church was in it with us. I’ve learned
how to praise God through hard times and I’ve known
real victory over difficulties that would have crushed
me otherwise.
“I believe God’s shaped our lives through it all.” JL
16 Jesus Life
www.jesus.org.uk