Infant and Child Sexuality: A Sociological Perspective - Ipce

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sexuality nor for the quality of sex education it provides for its young people. Yet many church-oriented youth remember some experiences from encounters with the church and with church professionals in the area of sex. The church has been the source of a good deal of the general sexual prohibitions in American society. On occasion, the church has specifically condemned departures from its sex codes, but more often it has depended upon the force of less tangible concepts such as purity, cleanliness, sin, uncleanness, depravity, and degradation to create a climate of repression. The very generality and indefiniteness of these concepts makes them inclusive. Each person who places himself under the authority of the church is likely to categorize himself in accordance with such standards. He is often more severe on himself than his fellows would be if they were judging his behavior. My first source of misinformation about sex came from my church. From ages six to thirteen I attended a Missouri Synod parochial day school. Between the ages of eight and twelve, church and school were totally integrated for me. What the school authorities stated was what the church dictated. Therefore, sex was taboo. As pupils, we were forbidden to mention the word or any activities relating to sex. I remember saying ‘sex’ to one of my friends when I was about ten. I was reprimanded by the teacher and told to write “I will never say sex” three hundred times. This seems to me to have been a selfdefeating punishment because it only served to reinforce the term. My liberal upbringing was eventually interrupted by the church. For a four or five year period, beginning when I was ten years old, I became extremely aware of sex taboos via the church. There were marriage and family classes that taught me not to “turn boys on” and that physical contact was a sin that marriage rectified. I started being very observant of my mother’s activities (she was a widow). When she went out with men, I constantly wondered whether she was having intercourse with them or not. I would lay awake at night and cry thinking surely she would go to hell because that was what was said in the Bible and in church. I’d hear stories about God’s love and all the rest; including God’s loving decree that anyone who had and enjoyed sex was a sinner... including my mother! Then, for some reason, after I was confirmed, we stopped going to church. The discussion with sex was still in my mind, though it lessened very slightly with time. My first instructor was my pastor when I was around twelve and ready for catechism. He took our co-ed class into a small room to explain 116
conception. His generalizations left me with the impression that only during one’s menses would one become pregnant. I still didn’t know how intercourse took place and the thought of having a bloody intercourse repulsed me. Each member of my confirmation class had to have a private meeting with the minister. He had not told us at all what it was for, but gave us a book to read about teenagers and growing-up problems. My minister was about 32 years old and had a very nice wife and four children. The private session, I (a girl, age twelve) thought, would be a preexamination of my faith and what I had learned through confirmation instructions. Well, it turned out to be nothing of the sort. He began questioning me about how much I knew about sex and dating, showed me diagrams of the female organs, and proceeded to explain the facts of life to me. It was a terrifying experience for me because I had never heard a male talking about this subject before. He continued to pry into my personal life and embarrass me. At this age I just wasn’t ready to discuss sex with an older man. I lost all respect for him as a minister and as a person. To me, it seemed that it was unnecessary for him to call me in for a private conference on sex. If he would have lectured to the whole class, I would not have been so ashamed, especially since I was quiet and shy at this age. His most shocking comment was something like if I ever needed a sex outlet, I should come to him. This really scared me and I would pray to God many times after that asking Him why he did this to me. His approach to sex education was very poor in taste, and it took me a long time to feel that sex was good and that I would ever engage in a relationship with a male. How a man in his position could talk to me as he did was beyond my comprehension. Some preadolescents have favorable attitudes toward sex education received through the church and are grateful for it. Thanks to the book Love and Life for Teenagers given to us during confirmation I learned the details plus facts from my more knowledgeable peers. Sex education is sometimes a part of the program of other adultsponsored organizations such as the Scouts, Campfire Girls, and others. I received no sex education at all at home. I was quite amazed and fascinated when a nurse came to a Girl Scout meeting in the fifth or sixth grade and told us about the menstrual cycle. 117
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INFANT AND CHILD SEXUALITY A Sociol
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About the Author Ph.D., Sociology,
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PREFACE We know very little about s
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Many persons played significant tho
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in infancy and childhood in hormone
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cause psychoanalytic theory, though
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and differentiating adults by such
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questions about his penis. He watch
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(Korner, 1973). The male infant has
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milk. Breast feeding is significant
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infant. Not only the amount but als
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According to the middle class stand
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myths about this practice. The Chil
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three hundred (one percent of the f
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Infants deprived of touch--holding,
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pervasive aspect of one’s total p
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The mother of a five year old told
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ate count as to the number who do,
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een aware that autoeroticism--eroti
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had erections when playing with gir
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they will eventually select their m
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and I can remember being scolded nu
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the arousal, but I was aroused. Chi
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was more inquisitive than sexual. B
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In both of the following cases, as
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emember to this day the nauseated f
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I remember one scene very well. He
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and he’d done it! The only penis
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of dwellings. He based his work on
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ents. Bandura and Walters conclude
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1965, p. 225). Children often contr
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shocked, told me not to do it anymo
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all children who are told to get
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cide that the child is “not old e
Page 70 and 71:
little”; “they grow out of the
Page 72 and 73:
that there was a “place in mommy
Page 74 and 75: tivity, and especially that which i
Page 76 and 77: His next approach was to tell me ab
Page 78 and 79: My father when undressed was a sour
Page 80 and 81: In other words, I was to avoid him,
Page 82 and 83: The general taboo on sensory-affect
Page 84 and 85: held by the eight year old. An inte
Page 86 and 87: asked each boy to rate his response
Page 88 and 89: It was not until high school that I
Page 90 and 91: fondling between the ages of eleven
Page 92 and 93: invited on an individual basis. Oft
Page 94 and 95: parents didn’t allow me to go any
Page 96 and 97: me. I repeatedly told her that I wa
Page 98 and 99: grade girl) was so embarrassed and
Page 100 and 101: societies that are considerably mor
Page 102 and 103: attempts at fellatio. Other cases i
Page 104 and 105: it. I felt a tingling all over my b
Page 106 and 107: me to look at a cunt as soon as pos
Page 108 and 109: Sex Instructions fondle me and inve
Page 110 and 111: ing. This pattern continued on to j
Page 112 and 113: long as I had started it, I could r
Page 114 and 115: As far back as I can remember my pa
Page 116 and 117: mal sex education from my father du
Page 118 and 119: with their immediate descendants. T
Page 120 and 121: fully initiated but not yet married
Page 122 and 123: nificance in the presence of childr
Page 126 and 127: Literature One indirect method util
Page 128 and 129: love, sex, and the opposite sex. Th
Page 130 and 131: year olds in Elmtown about 15 perce
Page 132 and 133: ing attitudes, conversations, and a
Page 134 and 135: Outcomes of Preadolescent Sexual En
Page 136 and 137: Positive in love romantic really li
Page 138 and 139: anticipation, and satisfaction. Wha
Page 140 and 141: IV. A FEW WORDS OF MY OWN It is goo
Page 142 and 143: BIBLIOGRAPHY Abelson, H., Cohen, R.
Page 144 and 145: Crist, John R., “High School Dati
Page 146 and 147: Ketcher, Allan, “The Discriminati
Page 148 and 149: Newton, Niles and Michael Newton,
Page 150 and 151: Woody, Jane Divita, “Contemporary
Page 152 and 153: INDEX Ford, Clellan S., 8, 15, 49,
Page 154: INDEX in early childhood with adult
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Infant and Child Sexuality: A Sociological Perspective - Ipce

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