Infant and Child Sexuality: A Sociological Perspective - Ipce

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ing. This pattern continued on to junior high school. The following three cases deal with the preadolescent coming to the realization that the parents have a life of their own as a married couple apart from their roles with the child in the family. This would seem to be an important cognitive sexual experience for the preadolescent. I think this occurred when I was in fifth or sixth grade. I realized that they probably didn’t take naps together on Saturday and Sunday afternoons just because they were tired, and besides they always locked the door and were displeased if disturbed. At night, when we all went to bed about the same time, I remember hearing their voices (not words) and they sounded different than they usually did when they talked. As I remember, I first became aware of this exclusive membership when I was eight or nine and walked into the kitchen finding my parents in each other’s arms. I remember wondering about this because I had never associated my parents with one another as being in love. The birth of a baby sister in my family made me aware that there was a relationship between my father and mother that I was not a part of. The fact that they maintained a separate bedroom was another indication that a different relationship existed. The accidental discovery of a contraceptive, at about the age of twelve, also contributed to my awareness. The following cases deal with sex education--both informal and formal--in which preadolescents and their parents are involved. First are some cases in which the encounter was viewed by the preadolescent as unsatisfactory. We went grocery shopping and passed boxes of sanitary napkins. I (a girl) used to wonder what they were for. She told me that I wasn’t old enough to know. I was in third or fourth grade at the time. When I began menstruating, I cried hysterically, not so much at the sight of the blood, but at the prospect of having to tell my mother. At age nine my own sexuality became an increased concern. I came upon my mother changing her tampax. The blood in the little pad worried me, and I asked her about it. She responded by saying I would learn soon enough what it was and not to worry about it. 102
Once in fifth or sixth grade I asked my father what it meant when a girl got in trouble. He said, “Ask your mother,” but he was so embarrassed by the question that I didn’t ask Mom. My girl friend and I walked home from school and she told me about the funny sensation she had experienced while lying in bed the night before. I told her I, too, had experienced the same situation; we decided to ask my mother about it. She gave us a vague explanation, but it was nothing more than a warning not to do it again. This experience planted in my mind that to talk about the body was bad and it only had dirty connotations. I slowly became quite selfconscious about my body. Indirectly my parents told me plenty. They made me feel that sex was dirty and was something to be ashamed of or embarrassed about. Yet they joked about it and my father always had some “girly” magazines lying around the house. At first I got a big kick out of looking at them, but later they just disgusted me and made me hate being a girl if all the men did was look at our bodies and make jokes about us. Throughout my childhood, I was taught that a young lady was to be properly modest and that sex and the body was not to be spoken of, not even to my parents or my brothers. I can remember once asking my mother what p.g. meant and she replying ‘pretty girl.’ I knew what it meant but you might say I was testing her. Terminology such as ‘the curse’ or ‘sick days’ when referring to menstruation certainly produced fear to say the least. When I asked them (my parents) how a person got pregnant, they replied, “you become pregnant only when you are married and in love.” I was morbidly afraid of falling in love for fear I would get pregnant. When Mom came home with a paper-back book for teenagers, I was very uninhibited, ready to learn and accept all that life had to offer. I just wanted to know! Mom said we’d read it together which I thought was just about perfect. That night nothing more was said so I decided to delve in and that night was reading it in bed when Mom walked in. She said that as 103
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INFANT AND CHILD SEXUALITY A Sociol
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About the Author Ph.D., Sociology,
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PREFACE We know very little about s
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Many persons played significant tho
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in infancy and childhood in hormone
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cause psychoanalytic theory, though
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and differentiating adults by such
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questions about his penis. He watch
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(Korner, 1973). The male infant has
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milk. Breast feeding is significant
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infant. Not only the amount but als
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According to the middle class stand
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myths about this practice. The Chil
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three hundred (one percent of the f
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Infants deprived of touch--holding,
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pervasive aspect of one’s total p
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The mother of a five year old told
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ate count as to the number who do,
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een aware that autoeroticism--eroti
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had erections when playing with gir
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they will eventually select their m
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and I can remember being scolded nu
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the arousal, but I was aroused. Chi
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was more inquisitive than sexual. B
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In both of the following cases, as
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emember to this day the nauseated f
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I remember one scene very well. He
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and he’d done it! The only penis
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of dwellings. He based his work on
Page 60 and 61: ents. Bandura and Walters conclude
Page 62 and 63: 1965, p. 225). Children often contr
Page 64 and 65: shocked, told me not to do it anymo
Page 66 and 67: all children who are told to get
Page 68 and 69: cide that the child is “not old e
Page 70 and 71: little”; “they grow out of the
Page 72 and 73: that there was a “place in mommy
Page 74 and 75: tivity, and especially that which i
Page 76 and 77: His next approach was to tell me ab
Page 78 and 79: My father when undressed was a sour
Page 80 and 81: In other words, I was to avoid him,
Page 82 and 83: The general taboo on sensory-affect
Page 84 and 85: held by the eight year old. An inte
Page 86 and 87: asked each boy to rate his response
Page 88 and 89: It was not until high school that I
Page 90 and 91: fondling between the ages of eleven
Page 92 and 93: invited on an individual basis. Oft
Page 94 and 95: parents didn’t allow me to go any
Page 96 and 97: me. I repeatedly told her that I wa
Page 98 and 99: grade girl) was so embarrassed and
Page 100 and 101: societies that are considerably mor
Page 102 and 103: attempts at fellatio. Other cases i
Page 104 and 105: it. I felt a tingling all over my b
Page 106 and 107: me to look at a cunt as soon as pos
Page 108 and 109: Sex Instructions fondle me and inve
Page 112 and 113: long as I had started it, I could r
Page 114 and 115: As far back as I can remember my pa
Page 116 and 117: mal sex education from my father du
Page 118 and 119: with their immediate descendants. T
Page 120 and 121: fully initiated but not yet married
Page 122 and 123: nificance in the presence of childr
Page 124 and 125: sexuality nor for the quality of se
Page 126 and 127: Literature One indirect method util
Page 128 and 129: love, sex, and the opposite sex. Th
Page 130 and 131: year olds in Elmtown about 15 perce
Page 132 and 133: ing attitudes, conversations, and a
Page 134 and 135: Outcomes of Preadolescent Sexual En
Page 136 and 137: Positive in love romantic really li
Page 138 and 139: anticipation, and satisfaction. Wha
Page 140 and 141: IV. A FEW WORDS OF MY OWN It is goo
Page 142 and 143: BIBLIOGRAPHY Abelson, H., Cohen, R.
Page 144 and 145: Crist, John R., “High School Dati
Page 146 and 147: Ketcher, Allan, “The Discriminati
Page 148 and 149: Newton, Niles and Michael Newton,
Page 150 and 151: Woody, Jane Divita, “Contemporary
Page 152 and 153: INDEX Ford, Clellan S., 8, 15, 49,
Page 154: INDEX in early childhood with adult
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