The Outpost Vol 1 - The Royal Highland Fusiliers

THE OUTPOST.
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2
THE OUTPOST.
---_._---­
beyond the regular purchase of a copy to the
attempt at writing a short article, a racy
anecdote, or even a small note for these
columns. With each fresh issue we hope to
see a llew pen at work, and it will assuredly
gladden the editorial heart if, in the course of
time, we arc inundated with contributions. In
this connection we would remind our readers
that the man who never before has blossomed
into prose or poetry may have latent talent
that only requires a little development. We
prognosticate a tenctency towards the humorous
;md for the world would not discourage it, but,
at the same time, let it be understood that the
serious outpouring is just as welcome to Cllr
columns. At all times a clever effort will be
most acceptable, and more so if it has a locul
allusion.
In conclusion, it is our pleasure to thank
those who have so willingly and ably assisted
in connection with this issue.
t i- t
The Fire Alarm.
A GAILES YARN.
THE drowsy sentry drew himself up with a jerk.
A r(:,d glare shot skywards from among the
huts. "Fire! fire!! Guard, turn out!"
eame in shrill tones from the now wide-awake
sentry. Through the still, frosty air of early
morning (I.30 a.m.) rang the notes of the Fir'e
Alarm, sounded by the bugler of the Guard.
One man in a hut heard it. "Fire, you men!
Double out, boys! There's the Fire Alarm! "
The news spread rapidly. "Double up, B
Company's Fire Piquet ! " came in: a roar' from
the Orderly Officer. The piquet came up in
great style at the double and commenced to
drag the unwieldy fire-engine towards the
scene of the alarm.
, In three minutes every man was at his post,
and breathlessly awaited instructions. Five
minutes passed, and no news. Ten minutes and
nothing happened. Then Officers bega~ to
move about, muttering inaudibly. Twenty
minutes, and still no news; Officers swore
audibly and men thought it a "false" alarm.
Just then the second in command appeared
with "news." "Only a tar-boiler got overheated
in the other Battalion lines, and not one
of their men turned out!" Well! Well! I
Well!! !
H. L. 1.
'* t t
Earth's crammed with heaven,
And every commbn bush afire with God i
But only those who see, take off their shoes,
The rest sit round, tell stories and smoke fags.
Road Trial.
ON Monday, 1St February, our Battalion was
taken out to judge various trial lengths of road
hetween Troon and Ayr for the Road Board.
A decision as to which was best has not yet
been arrived at, but the following extract from
a scout's report will give some indication of
how the land, lies.
No .. I.:--Ma~am, Ordinary.-This, as its
name mrllcates, 1" an ordinarv road' that is on a
:vet day (such as was 1St February), the sl;rface
IS extremely muddy, being covered by a thin
l.:;yer . of what is technically known as .. clay
sIlt WIth basalt chips,"-more familiarly known
as glaur or glabber. One point in its favour is
th~t those who have pot plants in the house
gam a pound or two of fine warp which can be
removed from the puttees by a vacuum cleaner
and .from thence given to the plants. One
surmIses that on a dry day in March this road
could raise" some dust." ,
No. 3.-Macadam, Ordinarv.-Surface tarred.
This has a distinct pull over No. I in that there
is less glaur, but the surface is so hard that the
:nen with Ammunition Boot AI (those issued
In the Tec.) found the tackets, with which their
boots are so thoroughly provided, eoming
through into their feet, while those with the
Boot Bz (first lot issued in Troon) found that
the smooth, wet, tarred surface was like the
Crossmyloof rink in a thaw.
No. 5.-Ditto, Tarred and Feathered.-The
feath.ering is a distinct advantage, put when
we cllscussed the matter with a dainty milliner
in Ayr she assured us that the pattern was
more like herring-boneing than feathering.
Perhaps we dreamt about the feathering. but
we harl to have something in the millinerv line
to start the conversation ",,-ith, hadn't we? ­
No. S.-Ditto, Treated with Pitch and Toss.­
We studied this length of road minutely, but
could ·not find any advantage in the fact that it
was used by the juvenile population of Whittlets
(or "as it Auchencruive ?) for their games, nor
could we understand why Pitch and Toss is
mentioned by the Road Board in preference to
Peever and Moshie.
No. 12 -Macadam dressed with Mexican
Bitumenous Mixture.-The name of this dressing
is enough to condemn it straight off. It's a
wonder our ammunition boots did not set fire
to the Bitumen, for they have fired our feet
on several occasions, and more so as Mexico is
known to be a hot bed of revolntion.
No. I5.-Porphorytic Conglomerate with
Bitumenous Shale Groundmass.-We think
the les(said about this, the better.
CHEVALIER.

THE OUTPOST.
3
The Sergeant-Major.
"LESS TALKING ON PARADE."
" WHEESHT, there's Kellv." In a moment the
murmur of voices c~ases, shoulders are
instinctively squared after the approved
military fashion, every head is set well back,
and every eye glares at the man in front as if in
conscientious study of the nape of the human
neck. The lapping of the waves on the shore,
and the tramp, tramp of many ieet, are the
only sounds that one can hear. "Any more
of that talking ,and ! ! ", the speaker does
not finish his sentence, but there is a perceptible
jutting out of that jaw and a glint in these
masterful, keen eyes that bodes ill for some
unfortunate. The silence in a way becomes
oppressive, and the change in general demeanour
wonderful. A sort of inhuman mechanism
seems to have descended on every man, each
seems to find fiendish pleasure in -this moving
statue attitude. By and by the great man
passes down the line in search of some other
little breach ef our rigorous system of discipline,
and in that part of the column that he has.jnst
left there is an audible sigh of relief--in some
cases the pursing of the lips and the omitting
of a long, low whistling breath-but no more
" yabbling," to use the R.S.M.'s own choice
phraseology. Oh, no! for the men are most
mindful of that unspokell threat.
Such is the personality of Regimental
Sergeant-Major James Kelly, who, like Bunty
in another sphere, pUlls, in collaboration with
our much respected Colonel and his Officers,
the strings of the I7th (Service) Battalion.
Ay, and pulls them right well, as our present
efficiency so eloquently testifies. The introductory
pen picture of a common scene might
suggest to the unknowing the personality of a
martinet, and, mayhap, to the anxious mothers
of our boys, a despot, but such, let it be known
at once, is not the case-far from it.
In the early days I and many others were
constrained to enquire, sotto voce, of the
individual nearest to hand, "Who is that? "
His reply was terse and monosyllabic­
" Kelly," but his look showed that it was not
the old Isle of Man joke.
I forget at the moment whom it wa'S that I
asked-I rather think it was a Q.-M.-S.-but
well do I remember enquiring further of him
in an amazed sort of wav, " And who the de1"l{:e
is Kelly?" "Kelly," - remarked my laconic
friend (assiduously attending to .some papers
the while), "will be a father to you. Hence·
forth he will be your father and the father otthe
Battalion." Into my unsophisticated civilian
brain the significance of the remark slowly
dawned, and with some degree of awe, mingled
with amusement at the military expression, I
contemplated my new papa. Behind all his
banter and chaff, it was not difficult to discover
a forceful personality, and without being unduly
eulogistic, papa at once impressed me.
Never once since we entered upon our
military duties has the subject of our sketch
failed to realise his paternal responsibilities,
and while, no doubt, he is a believer in the old
adage, " Spare the rod, spoil the child," it is a
happy circumstance that he has never, or at
least seldom, required to exercise the rod of
heavy punishment on his children, and yet we
have not been spoiled. Not for a moment
would we conntenance any such suggestion!
On the contrary, he has inculcated much sense
of things military, and by patience and without
the rod has developed from very raw material
a most serviceable crowd. From the private's
point of dew he is just the right, right hand
man to· Colonel Morton and our Offic

THE OUTPOST.
The Psychology 0/ the Stripe.
THE Company was marching on route and at
attention; quiet, good step, and in every way
observing the prevailing order. There was
none of those irritating trivialities (trivial only
in the eyes of the offender) to bother Officers or
N.C.O.'s, and the casual observer would have
found no fault. There was, however, gradually
borne on the mind of a Sergeant an irregularity,
trivial in itself, but none the less anathema to
C.O.s. What the irregularity was matters
little, sufficient for our purpose it existed, and
the Sergeant, as a matter of duty, and for his
own peace of mind, drew the attention of the
offending private with a view to its rectification.
The request was ignored at first, and was
obeyed _grudgingly, only on its being rendered
. in the fdrm of a command. A halt came shortly
after, and then the march was resumerl.
Even Sergeants, under favourable circumstances,
don't look for trouble, and even privates
under the same favourable circumstances do not
willingly serve it up in large quantities, but om
offending friend beforementioned wa

THE OUTPOST. 5
IN the first issue of the Battalion Magazine, which
we hope will be an interesting record and souvenir
of our life in the Army, we have thought it appro.
priate to collect notes appertaining to the work
and social life of the Battalion. The following
" Landmarks" have been compiled from the diaries'
of two of the Battalion Officers, and are extremely
interesting :­
12th Sept., 19I4.-Battalion formed. Medical
Examination and Attestation commenced.
15th Sept., 1914.-Assemblyof Recruits in 8th S.R.
Drill Hall. The following provisional allocation of
Halls for drill purposes was made
A Company 8th S.R. Headquarters, Cathedral St.
B 5th H.L.L Hill Street.
C 5th S.R. W. Princes St.
D 7th S.R. Victoria Road.
19th Sept., I9I4.-Kit, was issued in the Royal
Technical College to A and B Companies and to C
and D on the following day.
23yd Sept., 1914.-Recruits assembled in the
Examination Hall at the Royal Technical College,
and afterwards had a " send off .. by the Glasgow
Chamber of Commerce prior to proceeding to their
training camp at Gailes. The following Present.
ations were promised to the Battalion :-Colours
were promised by Mr. Montague Baird, Chairman
of the Chamber of Commerce, while Dr. and
Mrs. Beilby of the Technical College, offered to
present us with Bugles. Pipes and Drums. were
proposed as a joint gift from the Chamber of
Commerce and the Merchants' House. Under canvas
at Gailes until 13th October.
13th Oct., I914.-Moved into billets in Troon.
15th Oct., I9I4.-March back to Gailes Camp to
strike tents.
241h Oct., I9I4.-Battalion inspected by General
Gaisford, Inspector of Infantry.
2nd Nov., I9I4.-First route march, and on this
date vaccination was commenced.
. 4th Nov., I9I4.-Battalion was inspected by
Colonel Stanley Paterson.
7th Nov., 19I4.-Battalion paraded in Glasgow
through the main central streets and was inspected
outside the Municipal Buildings by representatives
'of the Chamber of Commerce. In the afternoon
a rugby match was played at Anniesland between
the Battalion and 2nd Glasgow Highlanders,
resulting in our favour, 40 points to nil. Gate
money amounting to £70 was handed to the Belgian
Relief Fund.
8th Nov., I914.-A route march of about 20 miles,
to Tarbolton and back to Troon, was accomplished.
This was the first whole day's marchof theBattalion.
13th Nov., 19I4.-The first party. was s!:nt to.
Chelsea School of Instruction.
27th Nov., 19I4.-Smoking Concert in Troon,
with talent drawn from the Battalion was most
successful, and the proceeds amounting to over £37,
were sent to the local Belgian Relief Fund.
5th Dec., I9I4.·-A rugby match in Troon between
So. 8 Platoon and the rest of the Battalion resulted
financially in £8 2S. 3d., being handed to Burns'
Ambulance Fund. .
7th Dec" I9I4.-Preliminary training was corn·
pleted and platoon training commenced.
9th Dec., I914.:-'A route march,. of over 20 miles,
to Kilmarnock and back to Troon via Dundonald
Hill, was accomplished. Inoculation against
typhoid was commenced.
12th Dec., 19I4.-Association football match in
Troon, played between A and C men and Band D
men. was successful in raising £6 IOS. 6d., which was
given to the Troon Red Cross Fund.
14th Dec., 19I4--The Battalion was definitely
included in the New Army and was designated the
17th (Service) BattalionH.L.I. ofthe II7thlnfantry
Brigade, of the 39th Division.
17th Dec., 19I4.-A Male Voice Choir was formed
among members of ~he Battalion.
22nd Dec., 1914.-A Battalion concert was held
in the Picture House, Troon, the talent being drawn
from the Battalion. The concert was highly
successful. Admission free.
23rd Dec., I9I4--An association football match
at Hampden Park, between the Battalion team and
Queen's Park, resulted in the score, 3 goals to 2;
Queen's Park winning by a goal. Christmas and
New Year leave was granted, six days being the
maximum.
2nd Jan., I915.-A rugby match, played. at
Anniesland between the Battalion XV..and the
48th Canadian Highlanders, resulted in the favour
of the Battalion, the scores being 14 points to 3.
Gate money amounting to £3 6s. Iod. was sent to
the Belgian Relief Fund.

13
THE OUTPOST.
8th Jan., 1915.-A new Company was added to
the strength of the Battalion, known as E Company.
Company training commenced.
22nd Jan., 1915.-Brigadier-General Hackett
Thomson, G.O.C., II7th Infantry Brigade, inspected
the Battalion on the Polo Ground.
30th Jan., 1915.-Company training was completed,
and Battalion training was commenced.
The members of the Glasgow Chamber of Commerce
have been very considerate of the men in the
Battalion, and the men are gratified by the various
kindnesses extended. The Vice-President, Mr.
James W. Murray, is providing the men with
running shorts and semmits, and Mr. W. F. Russell
intimates that he will supply each of the men with
mitts.
In addition to these gifts Mr. M' Artey (in
c'onjunction with the Merchants House) is going
to present some more Pipes. ::\'fr. Thorneycroft has
promised us two Machine Guns which will arrive in
due course. Several gentlemen have combined
together to present us with two Field Kitchens,
suited to feed 500 men each. These are ordered
and we shall be getting them s~on.
It will be some time yet before the Battalion
will be equipped with khaki uniforms, as the War
Office have intimated that they cannot sanction
service dress uniforms for the men in addition to
the two sets of navy blue already obtained. The
Chamber of Commerce is considering the raising of
Artillery and Engineer Units, and Sir A. M'Innes
Shaw has been authorised to confer with the
Corporation to ascertain if, and to what extent
the Chamber could co.operate with them. The
Battalion Pipe and Bugle Bands have made rapid
progress, and the massed bands of the Brigade are
now practising together on Saturdays. An H.L.1.
marching song, written by a member of the Battalion
and set to music by Miss M. E. Watt, has been
produced. and the profits of the sale are being
devoted to the Belgian Relief Fund. As the News
says :-" Tt is a light little, bright little ditty, with
just the right swing to carry it along."
Wednesday afternoons in future are to be spent
in some ldnd of athletic pastime, such as cross-­
country running, association and ru~by football,
hockey, and other forms of more or less strenuous
open-air exercise. Billiards, tiddley-winks and halfpenny
nap are barred.
Many men have applied for commissions, and
several privates have been given commissions in
the Battalion recently. Without unduly stretching
the long bow, we should say that about 75% of the
Battalion are mentally, physically and morally
capable of taking up commissions; but if all were
granted where would the 3rd Glasgow be ?
Those men who have been oarsmen in their day
should keep their stroke muscles in c,ondition as
there is a rumour to the effect that a boating club
might be formed. There is plenty of ancient
ocean around Troon.
These notes would be quite incomplete without
some reference to Major \V. Rounsfell Brown, who,
at the request of Sir A. M'Innes Shaw, consented to
act as our Adjutant until the Battalion was properly
established. Commencing' his duties on 7th Sep.
tember, he worked assiduously for our success, and
it was due to his untiring efforts and capacity for
organisation that we were placed on such a sound
footing at the start. We were most fortunate in
securing an officer of such wide experience. and his
services were fully appreciated by all ranks. Early
in October he left us, the Battalion by that time
heing well under weigh. Major Rounsfell Brown, has
however, since shown that his interest in our welfare
is still maintained, as he has given us two most
interesting lectures on "Stonewall Jackson" and
" The Royal Field Artillery."
t t t
The Battalion Bogey.
The" double" is the first parade, and it's a bit all
right,
I t helps to wake us up a bit, and whets the appetite;
If raining, and there's .. no parade," we don't
exactly weep,
But quickly hurry home again to get another sleep.
Chorus:
But the stuff we're not in love with, taking everything
all round,
Is that blasted squad drill, squad drill, in the bally
Polo Ground.
There's marching here and marching there, but
that's a blooming treat;
We've got used to our" bachals " now, and don't
get blistered feet.
A few more trips up Glasgow way would not be bad
at all,
Ah! how the" bhoys" could swank along the
" Rue de Sauchiehall ! "
There's Outpost duty on the hills and sham fights
all day long;
We like the days all right, you bet, with them
there's nothing wrong.
And digging trenches, it is fine. as with the pick and
spade
\-Ve look a lot of hardened toughs, of extra special
grade.
We do some night work now and then, which makes
us very glad,
Tt helps to keep us out of pubs, and therefore is'nt
bad.
It's cold at times, and blooming wet, and apt to
make us ill.
Rut it's the" beesiness " when compared with heartbreak,
viz.: squad drill.
For the stuff we're not in love with, taking everything
all round,
Is that blasted squad drill, squad drill, in the bally
Polo Ground.
A. D. H. S.

THE OUTPOST. 7
IT was suggested that this Magazine might be called
" The Bees-i.ness," but the consensus of opinion was
that such a title would" keel" it.
* * * *
Have you heard that the men of a certain platoon
> were told to stand with their feet at an angle of
45 inches?
* * * * *
A bumptious sergeant has told some ncw recrui ls
that" It takes a man of exceptional mental ability
to be an N.C.O."
* * * *
We all thought Wednesday, 3rd February, a bit
of a" killer," but proved ourselves" real hard nuts."
Of course we were inspired to a mighty effort in the
closing stages of the march by seeing our colonel
marching steadily along, his face illuminated by
that kindly smile that has so endeared him to his
men.
.. .. .. ..
*
Itis hard to say whether ihe baker or the isolated
platoon was the more pleased. when the van of the
one met the starving men of the other, when both
were miles away from Troon.
.. .. ..
* *
\Ve have heard one of our best known sergeants
called" The Butterfly." Do you know him-and
why?
..
* *
..
*
He is not the same one who reads" The Song of
Solomon" so assiduously during the sermon at
church parade-is he ?
*
..
*
..
Why some landladies are so scrimpy while others
can be so generous, we cannot say 1
.. .. ..
* *
When are the khaki unHorms coming?
.. .. .. ..
*
Have you seen the terrible s(ruggle every evening
to read the Battalion Orders on the notice board at
the Drill Hall ?
..
* * * *
.. ..
* '" '"
Are the Regimental Pets on the Strength?
They say the order about moustaches has alrcady
had the dire result of parting two loving souls-for
reasons of annoyance to the Fair One.
I-------~-~---

8 THE OUTPOST.
\
EDITORI~L . .....,.
" 0 Germany', tlvy oaks still stand,
RHt thou art fatten,
SUCH was the lament of a Gennan poet on the
occctsion of a previous downfall, and though the
Fatherland has recovered from this degradation,
sooner or later Gennany will again be overthrown.
In the meantime, however, the
quotation conveys a good deal of truth, for in
many respects Germany has already fallen.
The German people can no longer gain the respect
due to intellectual advance and honourable
action. They have fallen in our estimation,
having stooped to low, mean, debasing methods,
and made themselves so notorious for duplicity
that an officer writing home from the front
says :-" Never trust a German. It seems a
hard thing to say, but it is absolutely essentiaL"
A nation which allows its soldiers on active
service to indulge in drinking bouts, which are
bound to lead to inconveniences to the noncombatants,
if not to atrocities, cannot long
remain a Power. Germany has fallen morally;
her political downfall is sure to follow. This is
where we come in. It is to be our duty and
honour, to take part in aaministering the coupde-grace,
so we must fit ourselves for this task.
It's up to us to make ourselves superior to the
German soldiers in every way. \Ve must keep
on trying to make ourselves that" fine body of
men" that we like so much. to be considered.
In the Anny, as elsewhere, life is more or less a
game, and the game the soldier has to play is
what _Peter Pan called "an awfully big
adventure!" Each of us has a little part to
do, a different position to play in, and if we
forget that we are playing for a Great Team, our
si~e is sure to suffer. Undoubtedly we are
gomg to the Front sooner or later (probably
sooner), so let us never forget to play the game
for all we are worth. If each man just
remembers that he wears his old school colours,
the jersey of his ole! club, under his uniform.
he will always play the game; \Ve \~ill all
play up to one another, and the work of the
Battalion will go on hannoniously, with no
discord. We must follow the advice of one of
our own poets,
" Play up, Play up, ana Play the Game! "
We feel that it would be not inappropriate to
finish up the Outpost's first editorial with all
extract from "Germany and the Next War," bv
Genmal F. van Bernharcti, the man who has
done so much to propogate the great creed of
the" Duty to make War," explaining that, since
. the Germans are the finest people in the worlel,
I
• possessing more than any others, all the
attributes of the ideal man, it should be their
mission in life to Germanise the w0r1d (which
God forbid!) and for this end to use War if
necessary. The extract we have chosen,
however, does not deal with this phase of his
subject, but applies to us quite as much as it
does to the Gennans. I t is as fol1o\\ s :­
" Military service not only educates nations
in warlike capacity, but -it develops the
intellectual and moral qualities generally, for
the occupations of peace. It educates a man
to the full mastery of his body, to the exercise
and improvement of his muscles; it develops
his mental power3, his self-reliance and readiness
of decision'; it accustoms him to order and
subordination for a common end; it elevates
his self-respect and courage, and thus his
capacity for every kind of work."
Such i3 our message.
THE EDITOR.

THE OUTPOST,

10 THE OUTPOST.
Moustaches.
HOW TO GROW AND TRAIN THEM.
IN view of the fact that the Army Order
prohibiting the shaving of the upper lip is now
to be enforced, possibly a few hints from
"Moustache Regulations, I9I4" (Pale &
Golden, IQ /6) may be found useful to the men of
the Battalion. Few people realise that there is
an art in growing a r&1.lly beautiful hirsute
adornment. Nature unassisted may produce
hairs on the face, but before these hairs can
properly be called a moustache, the soldier
must take considerable pains and exercise much
patience if the best results are to be obtained.
In the first place, the upper lip should be
carefully cleaned morning and night for
three days. Vaseline and sand-paper applied
vigorously are best, and if the process hurts,
remember the motto of the Swedish Drill
instructors applies here: "If it did not hurt
it would be doing you no good." If part of
your face should be removed by the sandpaper,
remember that sick parade is at 8.30 a.m.
(All names to be given in at 7.T5.) On no
account use a file instead of sand-paper-files
are expensive and the metal is more useful in
other directions at present. After your face
has healed, watch carefully for the first signs of
the moustache, as the sprouting hairs are said
by the poets to be as beautiful and symbolical
as the shy crocus peeping from the earth in the
Spring. If you are able to perceive the hairs
on the fourth day without the magnifying glass,
do not be elated and do not expect to see them
growing. After a day or two, test the strength
of the moustache by striking a match on it.
lt is a good plan to measure the rate of growth,
and for this purpose use the back-sight of your
rifle. If the growth per diem amounts to half
the space between 300 and 400 yards, you have
every reason to hope. Should your moustache
grow more than one inch per day, apply for a
job at Pickard's Panopticon.
If the rate of growth does not satisfy you,
artificial fertilisation may be resorted to.
Collect some grease from a locomotive's
wheels, failing which, use the oil from the bolt
of your riile, and apply to the lip with a hard
scrubbing brush. Thereafter bathe the lip with
whisky, being careful not to swallow any of the
fluid. This latter exercise is verv difficult, for
if much of the alcohol is carelisslv imbibed,
you will be apt to lose all inter~st in the
moustache.
When you are certain your moustache has
grown one-fourth of an inch, you must decide
what colour you wish it to be, and its style.
There are three regulation colours :-black,
white and red. To get a black effect, rub with
dubbin before and after meals. For white,
use pipe clay, or if a military shade is required,
khaki blanco (6~d. at " Dunreggan ") may be
used. The red moustache is obtained by
staining with red ink, or preferably, port wine,
but only the best quality of the latter should be
used. With regard to style, the experts at
favour the straight or "right dress"
moustache. The ends should be pulled well out
and thoroughly soaped. The pulling out may
be done with the tongs, and good results can be
secured if you get a friend to help you. The
" U " shape is not fashionable now, and, if you
adopt it, you may be mistaken for the Kaiser.
Do not on any account grow a drooping
moustache; it has a very depressing effect on
observers, and makes one look like a love-"ick
walrus.
Lip drill assists the growth. Go to the
parade ground before retiring to bed and prone
fall, then go through the fo]Jowing exercise in
three motions
Bring the upper lip smartly over the nose.
Carry it to right and left until it touches the
ears.
Return to its natural position.
If this exercise hurts, remember it shows that
it is doing you good. Should you be arrested
during the exercise for being drunk and
incapable, you may expect seven days' hard
labour, as your explanation will not be accepted.
If your moustache does not show any signs of
appearing after l'''l''':',lding with the foregoing
methods for a you should leave the
Army and join the "y -uwcnv1"'" you will
probably get continuous extra drill for shaving
the upper lip.
Notes.-Abstain absolutely from osculation
during the period of moustache training. Be
careful that the moustache does not grow
inwards-it might choke you in your sleep.
M. 1..
Sing about the little daisies,
Some old kindergarten song;
Of the busy bees abuzzing
Down glades trimmed with pink chiffon.
Sing the ancient minstrel ditties,
\Vhiskered things we've heard before,
But for heaven's pity spare us
Those patriotic songs of war.
t t t
Tirpitz didn't succeed in giving Yorkshire the
Seydlitz powder. He got a few British pills to keep
him going.
~. t t
The Lieutenants in the German army are called
Loot-tenants by those who know the blighters best.

THE OUTPOST. 11
A Roundabout Journey Home
from the Alps.
IT was on the 23rd July last, nearly a fortnight
before the outbreak of war, that our party of
three had crossed the English' Channel en route
for the Italian Alps. We were in anything but
a war-like mood, and the unusual sight of a
complete cordon of Britain's grim, grey
floating sentinels, extending from Calais as far
as the eye could see into the misty north-east,
onlv aroused a vague curiosity. It was only
e.'{tended man'ruvres of the Fleet-an attempt
to block the .:-;rorth Sea. 1hat evening at the
Gare de Lvon, Paris, rumours \\ ere rife of
trouble at 'the Mont Cenis Tunnel between
France and Italy. We could get no definite
information, ho\-ievcr. It was a land"lide or a
cloud-burst, anyhow we would know when we
reached there! The train was going and that
was sufficient for U8, not a ,>uspicion was
aroused as to the real cause. Next morning
when we awoke we found ourselves in Geneva
instead of the Italian fron tier town, Modane,
No one knew why; no one knew how we \\ ere
going on: certainly no one cared. Eventually
we did arrive at Turin, via Switzerland and the
Simplon Tunnel, ana our destination, Cogne,
late on Saturaay night, 25th July.
In this primitive little Italian Alpine village,
6 hours by a tortuous mountain track from the
nearest main road, situated at a height of 5,200
feet in the centre of the Graian Alps, we spent a
few energetic days among the snows.
On Wednesday, the 29th, we shouldered our
packs, about 25 to 30 Ibs. each, and aisappeared
into the mountains. Five days later we
emerged far to the south at Ceresole Reale,
having w-ith the aid of our compasses, aneroid
and map, traversed two peaks, one the Gran
Paradiso (13,350 feet), the highest in Italy, and
crossed two glacier passes. The Italian maps,
at lea8t those of Northern Italy, are shockingly
bad, being not only inaccurate, but so badly
reproduced as to make even their inaccuracies
irmocuous on account of the impossibility of
decyphering them. "Ve had, however, a map
specially prepared by the Italian Alpine Club on
the Sw-iss model, beautifully contoured and
shaded, scale, 2 centimeters to the lrilomitre
(R.F. 1/50,000). That night, Monday, 3rd
August, disquieting rumours began to reach
us of warlike preparations just over the border
in France, and before morning it appeared
certain that France and Germany were at war.
To ascertain definite news we set off on the 4th
for Turin by motor, bus, and train. There we
learned all that had happened in the previous
week, and how Europe awaited breathlessly the
entry of Britain into the_conflict.
Not knowing which way Italy would jump,
we at once made tracks for the station. The
railway officials were very polite. "Yes, yes,
certainly," we could go to Modane by the Paris
expres3. But could we get over the French
frontier? Ah I that was quite another matter.
They were extremely distressed, but there were
already over 3,000 refugees stranded at Modane
Station, without food or shelter. Possibly III a
week or two, but now-! Disgusted, we raided
the shipping offices. The only hope here was
an Orient Liner due at Naples on the 7th.
Genoa being pretty much on the route there, '
we resolved to go there first ana set off at once,
an'iving that night. .:-;rext morning the" star
turn" on the newspaper bills was " The King
of England declares war on the Teutons," and
in the opinion of the local scribes, all was over
for Wilhelm and his friend3, bar some shooting.
The unanimity of opinion was remarkable, and
wherever we \\eut we were received most
cordially. Everyone seemed eager for Italy
to join in and get some of her own back. The
enthusiasm for England, the Fleet, and our
nation::tl resources was almost amusing.
Unfortunately CL financial crisis in a small
scale ensued, and paper money depreciated
rapidly 100 per cent. This was annoying, not
to say inconvenient, as we were carrying mostly
Bank of England notes. These were found of
no value; low class money-lenders even would
not look at them, and so we did what in the
circumstances was probably the best thing,
assumed an air of prosperity and put up at the
best hotel. Having no money we gave up all
thought of Naples, and applied ourselves to
raising cash at Genoa, primarily to book
passages on the British India Coy.'s steamer,
Nevasa, due on the 7th, en route for England,
and secondly. if possible, to buy tobacco, etc.,
and pay our trusting host. After a wearisome
day of great heat and many rebuffs, we managed
to raise some 700 Lire through business
connections. And then, of course, the Nevasa
never arrived, hav-1ng been scared off by the
Goeben and the Bres/au, and we had to start all
over again. Each morning we padded softly
along the shady side of the narrow Via Balbi to
the shipping offices, and then from there out
into the fierce glare of the newer city to the
British Consulate. Here we sat on cool marble
steps and met our friends in misfortune, mostly
English vicars, honeymoon couples and the
usual quaint mixture of the British tourist
abroad. The excitement was always immense:
no one had money; everyone wanted it;
nothing ever happened and no progress seemed
to be made.
Meantime Italy was busy mobilising, and
long lines of dusty troops passed daily through
the city. "A fine body of men" they were too.

12
THE OUTPOST.
Our only hope was that we might be away
before any necessity for them would arise.
One result of this mobilisation was an immense
rise in food prices, so that the poor were being
fed in Nineau, Turin and other big towns by the
lOth of August. In addition there was such a
shortage of coin that it was almost impossible
to purchage anything unless the exact sum was
tendered.
But at last the great British Government had
got to work and we were informed that the
Admiralty, the Foreign Office, and the White
Star Company. had put their heads together and
arranged to bring us all home on one of the
Company's boats, the S.5. Cretic, 13,900 tons,
lying dismantled in Genoa harbour. We were
to pay {lO each and the men were to have
steerage accommodation, and the ladies all
available cabins. The boat was filthy and full
of undesirable, albeit diminutive passengers,
having been used almost exclusively for Italian
emigrant traffic. The captain was fortunately
in Genoa, and we did finallv sail on the 13th of
August, at II p.m., after some trying days.
The weather throughout the voyage home was
perfect, but the conditions in the steerage bunk
were such as to give rise to a formal debate in
the saloon on " Pulex irritans, its position in the
human economy," and only the certain knowledge
that it was a scratch affair prevented a
very famon;'; professor from taking the chair.
It was stated that thehatches had been battened
down, and the place thoroughly disinfected.
On our remarking to a Scottish steward, a
'.' man frae Gourock," that that wonld hardly
be sufficient, he replied, "Mebbe no, but it
wad gie them an awfu' shock." We passed
Gibraltar on Sunday. At such a time this
particularly grim looking British outpost was
of special interest. Only two destroyers were
to be seen guarding the Straits. In the
Atlantic several flutters of excitement were
caused by the appearance of war vessels. Thev
never cameclose to us, buttwinkled questioningly
with their heliographs.
On account of the rascally character of the
crew, and the numerous cases of theft-suit
cases, bags and jewels-the captain formed
several of us into a Special Police Force. We
were continually on duty in relays day and
night, but the only excitement was during the
last night when sailing with only head lights,
some 100 miles off Land's End. About 2 a.m.
three evil looking shapes suddenly appeared
alongside. They were British· Destroyers,
patrolling without lights, but having read our
name they sheered off again into the darkness.
We reached Liverpool on Friday evening,
the 21st August, all precious glad to get home,
but with hardly a " fiver" among the 600 of us.
M.
Lieut.-Col. D. S. Morton, V.D.
TRE 1]1h (Service) Battalion H.L.I. has been
singularly fortunate in having as its Commanding
Officer, Lieut.-Colonel Morton. It was
fitting that one who had to fill such a post
should be a Glasgow man, and this may be
said emphatically of our C.O. He was born
and educated in Glasgow, his business career
has been in that city, and for many years he
has supported the Volunteer movement in the
West of Scotland. Though primarily a
Glasgow man, Lieut.-Colonel Morton's interests
have not been confined to the citv from which
our Battalion has been raised; f;r (to take an
instance) as a Rugby footballer his fame is
International. He played forward for the
West of Scotland Club for about eight years,
and was captain for two years, in one of which
the " West" was the champion team of Great
Britain. He was selected to play forward for
Scotland in 1887, and that year had the unique.
distinction of scoring in all the three International
matches, notching four tries in all. He
played for Scotland for four years, one year as
captain.
His Volunteering service has been varied,
and very thorough. He joined the 1St
Lanark Rifle Volunteers as private, and served
three years in the ranks, he then retired, and,
as Sergeant, joined the 1st Lanark R.E.
Volunteers. After having served four years
with that Corps, he received a Commission in
the 5th Battalion H.L.I., and was promoted
1st Lieutenant, Captain and Major in due
course, retiring with the rank of Lieut.-Colonel.
In 1900, when Captain, he was selected to
command the 1st Volunteer Service Company
of the H.L.L, and in that capacity served with
the 71St in South Africa for about a year and a
half with distinction, being mentioned in
despatches in connection with the operations
resulting in the capture of General Prinsloo and
3,000 Boers. His medals are" South Africa,"
with three clasps, and the Volunteer Decoration.
Not only on account of his previous work,
but also because of his family and business ties,
Lieut.-Colonel Morton might have been excused
if he had chosen to remain at home; but he
showed his character and patriotism by
volunteering at once for active service,
recognising, as every man ought to do, that in
the present crisis one's country has one's first
claim.
In person, tall and spare, and with a dignified
and courteous manner, Lieut.-Colonel Morton
bv his firmness, justness and humaneness has
gained the trust and affection of every one in his
command. It is the feeling of all ranks in the
Battalion, that we have in Lieut.-Colonel
Morton the commander we want.

THE
L ieut.-Colon el D . S. M RTON. V.D.

14 THE OUTPOST.
A Day in the Life of a
Company Orderly Sergeant.
J HAD just entered my billet last. Sunday in it
most sanctimonious frame of mind, due to
listening to our good parson elaborate on the
fearfulness of the war, and how we were to do
our " Bees-i-ness" by fighting to " Kiel," and
was in the act of removing what we had
hitherto called puttees, but which were now
being rapidly reduced to strips of green 'cloth
adorned 'with fringes at irregular intervals,
when in bounced that blighted ass Sergeant
Rightdress.
As his face was beaming all over, I said I was
pleased to see him, for I thought he had come
to tell me that the Q.~.L had at last received
the long looked for service uniforms, and we
would now have some resemblance to soldiers;
but, alas, no. The infernal grin on his ugly
dial was, as I quickly found, owing to the fact
that he had completed his term of office as
C.O.S., and was therefore about to hand over
these onerous and important duties to the next
Sergeant on the Company roster.
From beneath his greatcoat (save the mark),
he brought forth this precious book, and with
a sinister gleam in his eye, announced that I
could have the pleasure of making up the list of
duties for the following night, and without
fuIi;her ceremony he gleefully danced off,
which I thought was most unmannerly and
unkind.
However, I tackled the situation as befits one
who has had a " scheme" explained to him by a
platoon commander, and there and then
started to make out a list of the men, as
follows :-A RO.S. and his Corporal, a Sergeant
of th{1 Guard and his Corporal, six men to go
along with them, three more for---­
(censored) .
1 also selected another six men in case some
of the first lot should develop chicken-pox, or
corns, in the interim, and with a sigh of relief
I finished the first part of my task.
After a night during which I dreamt of being
C.O.S. to half a dozen companies and palading
duties for the rest of the British Army, with
Lord Kitchener himself as Captain of the day,
I awoke in a bath of perspiration to find that it
was 7.5 a.m., which just left me time to put on
my " balatas .. (part of which had melted O'Iving
to a bad habit of resting mv feet on the mantelpiece
while swotting up Field Service Regulations
of an evening), and a pair of shorts made
out of the first issue of trousers which we
received at Gailes, and hurry on parade.
The" great man" had just shouted" r-r-right
-dress" (a la Chelsea), in that silver toned
voice of his, when I rushed on to the parade
ground, and at the command "calltherolls,"
again rushed round to report all present to the
S.M. and just managed to warn the men on my
list to parade spick and span at the drill hall at
5.45 p.m. sharp, before the platoons gradually
melted away in the dusk of the early morning,
and left my Corporal and self to collect the
names of the half dozen or so chronic invalids
whose sole parade is at 7.15 a.m. when they
crawl out in all sorts of garments to show us
how deserving they are of our sympathy, which,
needless to say, they don't get. Our S.M.
then called me over to say that my number" of
the strength of the Company were all wrong,
and that I had l)etter look into the matter
before next parade, and as this generally takes
a goofl part of a day, I wandered back to the
billet in anything but a happy mood. By the
time that I had found that Private ]ones was
on leave till Tuesday morning, Corporal Rearrank
was in hospital with a swollen head or
foot, three men had been "discharged for the
purpoRe of being gazetted to a commission and
paid up to date, etc., etc. (the last mentioned
being now a daily occurrence in one of the
platoons), and other five had evidently slept in,
trusting to the inclemency of the weather that
there would be " no parade," and should have
been reported absent, the time had slipped
quickly by, and minus breakfast and with the
tape of one puttee showing below my knee (a
heinous offence now-a-days), I marched off to
the 9.15 parade, the remains of what used to be
a smart KC.O.
Again I doubled round to the front of the
Battalion and handed over a sheaf of names and
figures which looked like some secret code.
They evidently passed muster, so I doubled
back again to my platoon (a C.O.S.'s movements
are always done at the double), and our
Company marched off for the morning's work,
comisting, we were told in bated breath, of the
carrying out of a " scheme," which, as usual,
turned out to be that the left half of the Company
was to attack an impossible position,
defended by the other half, who could never
have got there. The afternoon's work consisted
of "blobbing" and other popular
movements which make us feel glad when we
are dismissed for tea.
The other men can then spend the rest of the
day as they please, but for the poor C.O.S. on
the night he parades duties, well! well!!
well!! !­
I was round sharp at the drill hall and found
all the men had turned up with the exception
of the B.O.S., who strolled in ten minutes later
with the excuse that he thought I had said
Tuesday, and also he was sure that it wasn't
his turn, and was still arguing the point, when
we were called to attention and the Adjutant

THE OUTPOST.
15
came along to find fault with what I thought
was an immaculate guard, but by the time he
had finished his inspection, it turned out to be
the worst he had ever seen, and I departed
cursing everybody from the Kaiser upwards,
and asking myself the oft quoted lines,
" Why did I join the H.L.I.? Why did I join
the army? " etc.
As I turned the corner of my street a seething
mob met my gaze, and, hastening up, I found
it was the rest of the Company clamouring for
their passes which I had omitted to get signed.
I managed to extricate myself out of the
difficulty by threatening to put everybody in
the guard-room for disrespect towards a N.C.O.,
and with a little judicious handling worthy of
General French himself, dispersed the crowd
and retired into my room to lose myself in the
heap of red books, notes from the front, Guides
to Promotion, etc., kindly supplied by a
generous Army Council, presumably for the
purpose of occupying the spa,re time of a
Sergeant when finished" Parading Duties."
A. M.C.
QUEEN
0'"
H[AIlrS.
On many-a jolly strand and gay parade,
By Brighton's piers and Eastbourne's chalky hills,
You passed your time, a very happy maid,
Too full of health to think of mortal ills.
1ben blew the Tyrtcen trump of martial Mars,
And soldiers sprung like mushrooms from the soil,
Cohorts of khaki, showers of jolly Tars,
To biff the Hun, to humble him and foil.
Where was your part, what, strictly, was your bit,
Amidst the hurly-burly of the war ?
Your brothers 'listed, you were badly hit
When your boy went to give the Huns" what for."
But you were grand, my word, you did your part,
I cannot praise, I spoil it more or less;
You took up nursing with a proper heart,
You turned out trump, the Queen of Hearts, I
guess.
Respectful serenaders dare not sing
Outside the chamber casements nowadays,
Even the poets do not care to sling ­
About so free their modicum of praise.
But take this wreath of laurel, so to speak,
I, one poor broken bloke, cast from the strife,
Thank God for you, and when his heart will break,
He'll mention you to them in that New Life.
W. J. F. H.
The Song of Strenuous Days.
(With apologies to Tom Hood.)
By THE .. GARRION" BROTHERHOOD.
\Vith muscles distorted and drawn,
With bodies oppressed with pain,
We are seeking to learn the soldier's art,
In frost, and sleet, and rain!
Drill! dri11! drill!
From sunrise till close of day,
With never a break in the cheerless task,
And, oh! what a paltry pay!
Work! work! work!
With rifle, or pick and spade;
And work! work! work!
Till daylight begins to fade.
March! double! extend!
Fix and gnard and thrust;
Digging deep down in the miry trench,
Or restoring the earthen crust.
Oh! men who stay at home!
Oh! men who recline at ease!
Just think at times how we save your skins,
By enduring ills like these!
Train! train! train!
Oft.times far into the night;
Creeping along on hands and knees,
With never a star in sight.
March! march! march!
O'er hills that are long and steep;
And march! march! march!
On the sands by the rolling deep.
Manceuvre--entrench-advance­
Take cover--detour-retire !
With" Non·C'oms." grousing when we are remiss,
And Officers spitting forth fire!
Oh! for a brief respite!
With freedom for one short day !­
A glimpse at the Rue de Sauchiehall,
Or the" Good Old Queen's" a t play!
For the" Rank" may enjoy the dance,
Have ladies to whist and to tea,
But the Private who hails a girl after hours
Is due a week's" c.B."!
Toil! toil! toil!
With hands that are hard and rough;
And toil! toil! toil!
Long after we've had enough!
Oh! the path to " stripes" is a narrow lane,
And" passes" too few are given-
The private's course lies the way of the guards,
The sergeant's-the route to heaven!
With muscles distorted and drawn,
And bodies oppressed with pain.
We are making speed in the soldier's art
In spite of aches, and rain!
March I march! march!
Oh! honour and glory we'll win,
When the Glasgow Third dash the Huns aside
And enter the gates of Berlin I

THE OUTPOST.
the Battalion, and beat them by 13 points (2 goals,
I try) to 3 points (I try). The second was played
on the 7th February, when No. 8 Platoon played
the rest of B Company, the result being a draw,
2 tries (6 points) each.
The following have played for the Regimental
Team on the occasions indicated by letters: G for
Glasgow Highlanders, F for Fettes College and C
for Canadian Highlanders :-
Pte. 'Warren, B Coy. (G, F and C) i Pte.Osborne,
D Coy. (G, F and C); Lieut. Laird, C Coy. (G, F and
C); Pte. Fraser, B Coy. (G, F and C); Sergt. Lang
E Coy. (G and F); Corpl. Smith, D Coy. (C)
Sergt. Reith, B Coy. (G and C); Pte. Gudgeon, A
Coy. (G, F and C) ; Lieut. Begg, B Coy. (G, F and C);
Lieut. Maxwell, E Coy. (F and C) ; Lieut. Paterson,
A Coy. (F); Lieut. Gardner, A Coy. (C); Pte.
Kennedy, C Coy. (G and F); Pte. Pattison, B Coy.
(G, F and C); Pte. Dobson, B Coy. (G, F and C) ;
Pte. MacDougall, B Coy. (G, F and C); Pte.
Fleming, B Coy. (G and F) ; Pte. Carpenter, B Coy.
(G and Cl; Pte. Cruickshanks, B Coy. (G);
Pt. Binnie, B Coy. (C).
Little was done seriously in the athletic sphere
until we came to Troon. 'While at
Rugby
Gailes we had some desultory
Football. games, and occasionally we were
" told off " by Sergeants for chucking a ball about
'in the lines. When we got settled in Troon,
arrangements for playing began to take more
concrete form, and eventually a match against the
Reserve Battalion of the Glasgow Highlanders was
fixed up, and played at Anniesland, on Saturday,
7th :'{ovember, 1914.
\Ve had the game pretty well in hand, and the
result was a win for the Regimental Team by 40
points to nil. It can be said for the Highlanders,
however, that a draft from Glasgow to their War
Station in Fife had taken a ,number of their best
players. This match was played just before the
vaccinations. When we had recovered, a game
was played at Troon, on 5th December, in aid of the
Burns' Ambulance Fund. One side was made up
entirely from No. 8 Platoon, the other being the
Battalion, and the game resulted in a win for the
Battalion team by 5 points to 3 (r goal to I try).
A pretty close game, in which the final score just
represents the run of the play.
On the I9th December the Regimental Team
travelled to Edinburgh to play Fettes College
1St XV. The ground was rather hard, but a good
game was played, the Battalion winning by I6
points (2 goals, 2 tries) to 8 points (I goal, r try).
During Christmas and New.Year Holidays a
number of the 48th Canadian Highlanders were in
Glasgow visiting friends, and they challenged us to
a game, which was played at Anniesland, on
Saturday, 2nd January. Here again we showed
our superiority by winning by 14 points (I goal,
3 tries) to 3 points (I try). The next Regimental
game is to be against 6th Bn. H.L.I. We have had
two smaller games since Christmas. In the first,
on I6th January, B Company opposed the rest: of
Although the attention of authorities seemed to
be occupied mainly with Rugby
Association Football at first, the large Associa·
Football. tion element in the Battalion soon
made its presence felt, for even in
the short time we were at Gailes a few "Soccer"
matches were arranged and played. One of them
was that between No. 10 Platoon and No. n.
This game though slightly one.sided, was very
interesting, and resulted in a win for No. 12
Platoon by two goals to nil. Another game at
Gailes which caused much comment was that
between No. 8 Platoon, of "Rugger" fame, and
No. 6, THE" Soccer" Platoon of B Company. The
Rugby men discovered to their dismay that
" handling the fut" is an art entirely different from
the handling to which they had been accustomed,
for they had to own defeat to the extent of 3 goals.
Some time later a committee was appointed to
arrange trial ,games for the purpose of choosing a
H.egimental Association Football Team. After due
consideration this team was picked, and made its
debut against Queen's Park F.C. on 23rd December,
1914. Much interest was taken in this game, and
it was worth it, for, afteI: a most exciting tussle,
the Battalion team, defeated, but not disgraced,
retired losers by 3 goals to 2. When the players
become better acquainted, and benefit by the
increased faciEties for training, they should be able
to make quite a good show against the majority of
First League Teams.
A start has at last been made in this grand sport,
and we hope to have, in our next
Cross-Country issue, the pleasure of reporting on
Running. many good runs. Quite a number
of running clubs whose fixture lists
have dropped would be pleased to send a few men
to run with, or against, a Battalion pack.

THE OUTPOST.
17
Although this is our latest venture amongst the
various sports which have sprung
Hockey into existence in our Battalion, it
Notes. has already been taken up,
especially by our Officers, with so
much enthusiasm, that we feel the game is now on
an equality with the more patronised Rugby and
Association.
We have been very fortunate in getting good
ground to play on, and have also the full comple.
ment of StIcks and pads, so that all we require now
is more men to come forward and increase the
number of players in order that representative
Company games may be arranged, from which a
Regimental team could be selected.
C Coy. versus A and D Coys. opened the Hockey
season for the Battalion, A and D winning by 5
goals to 3. C played one man short throughout,
otherwise a closer result might have been obtained.
A and D Coys.led by 4 goals to nil at half·time. On
resuming C Coy. at once started to reduce this
margin. and after 25 minutes play had the score
4-2. A and D again pressed hard, but were unable
to pierce the stubborn defence of Captain Anderson,
who was keeping goal well. Ultimately, in a
scrimmage in the-goal mouth, the ball was scraped
through. Lieuts. Paterson and Gardner combined
well on the wing, but failed to finish, C got their
third goal just on " time," after a splendid run on
the left. For the winners Keast, O'Kell, Philp
and Booth all played splendidly, while for C Coy.
Dickson, Famell, Walker and Anderson were best.
Nearly every branch of sport has received some
slight encouragement from head·
Why not quarters. "Soccer," Rugby, Hockey
a (lolf and Cross-Country work all have
Competition? their devotees, and have found
favour, but followers of the Royal
and Ancient Game have, so far, had very little
opportunity of competing against one another in
open competition.
Every Saturday sees the Municipal Courses of
Troon fairly' busy, and, now that the days are
lengthening, much more so than they were earlier
in the winter. The majority of the players are
drawn from the ranks of the Battalion, and it
would surely be an easy matter to bring all these
enthusiasts together and provide an excellent
meeting.
First of all the competition might be an
eliminating one between platoons, developing
through the various stages into a contest for the
championship of the Battalion.
The matter of handicapping is one which might
cause some little labour, but there are many
followers of the pastime who would devote a little
of their spare time to the carrying through of this
department. It is to be hoped that this short
paragraph will have the desiretl effect, and that by
the publication of our second issue, results of
preliminary rounds will be to hand.
Tennis? No! Not yet, Harold ! !
Berlin VIa The Polo Ground.
Bitter though the blast and biting, we must tumble
out of bed,
Polish up our belts and buckles, lest to trouble we
be wed,
And no man can say he's perfect, for the sergeant's
piercing eye
Picks out faults where least expected-I'll be caught
too, by and bye.
" Watch your right and get your dressing," thus the
Sergeant.:Ma,jor bawls,
As we shuffle to our places like a row of wooden
dolls,
Aud we do our drill at random, to be shouted at
again,
Till we wonder in abasement if we really once were
men.
Then each Company Commander, taking over his
command,
(Blithely conscious that he holds us in the hollow of
his hand),
Never deigning to consult us, drives us like a flock
of sheep
To the fields where mud is deepest, or .. squad
drills " us till we weep.
Oh! the joy of digging trenches, where the stones
are thick as thieves,
While the Officers are laughing up their brand-new
khaki sleeves,
And the N.C.O.'s are watching-but the subject
isn't one
That we Privates care to dwell on, for it's precious
little fun.
Turn we then to " Blob Formation": this is quite
the 'cutest plan
To ensure that" killed by doubling" is the lot of
every man.
Often do I wonder sadly, as my weary legs I steer,
Why a friendly German bullet doesn't stay my wild
career.
Like good soldiers, every Sunday we attend the
Church Parade,
And we march behind the Pipers very solemnly and
staid;
It may be we've got no option, but we never show
distress,
For the Church Parade on Sunday is the real
" business."
t t t
BEE.
There lived a Willie, bad and bold.
Beside the river Spree,
\\Tho swanked and lied from mom to night,
No man so base as he.
And still the burden of his song
For ever used to be :
" I care for nobody, no, not I,
And nobody cares for me !"

18 THE OUTPOST.
1b'e
&t.ll'2shdde
1i=lmmed
c:Jrfu
Ldce .... TO."'......
Lucy had a sunshade trimmed with lace,
A dainty halo for a pretty face.
But when Harry walked beside her
The sunshade seemed to hide her,
And he found it in the way and out of place.
Though he had come, to court the maid. from town,
Sarcastic words he uttered with a frown.
Of course, he didn't mean them,
But the sunshade came between them,
And he wished to goodness she would put it clown.
\Vhen Harry, with his patience almost spent,
Proposed to her, he found in the event
That in spite of its abuses
A sunshade has its uses
\Vhen a maiden coyly whispers her consent.
For he popped the question in a public place,
V{here lovers newly plighted can't embrace;
He couldn't quite resist her.
But no one knew he kissed her,
For Lucy had a sunshade trimmed with lace.
J. C. c.
A friend of ours was told on unimpeachable
authority that a firm in London has received an
order for I,500 pith helmets to be sent to Troon !
* * * *
Another rumour says ihat we are off to the
Continent for the summer, but we'll return to Troon
again when the cold weather comes. winter. I915-r6.
* * * * *
\Ve have it on unquestionable authority, however,
that we are leaving Troon for :i :-.CC::;; c, on Tuesday,
r7th C~";:;""';;;:. 19.:',.
* * * *
That we are a fine body of men is the con·
gratulatory remark one hears everywhere.
,.
*
If that is the case, why should someone say that
a certain platoon reminded him of the lost "legend 1"
,.
,.
Under Canvas.
OH 1 You joined since we came to Troon and
never saw life at Gailes at all? By jove ! you
missed what was in many ways the best part
of our training. The three weeks we spent
under canvas. in glorious autumn weather,
were simply splendid. You would hear of us
assembling in the Tec. and marching to St.
Enoch's with our kit on our shoulders. and of
the tremendous send off we got from our friends
in town. \Vell. when we got to Gailes we found
that Transport-Sergeant Fraser and his merry
men of the Advance Party had constructed a
nice little canvas village for our accommodation.
and we started camp life in high spirits.
Life under canvas requires to be experienced
to be appreciated, for no onc who has not lived
in camp can understand how interesting and
attractive it is. We spent the first afternoon
mainly in getting in tent boards and trying to
level up the floor, drawing paillasses. blankets,
and tartan rugs from the Q ..">1.. and generally
endeavouring to make our new home habitable.
For the most part we wore slacks (our own)
and jerseys, for the present clothing (some call
it uniform 1) had not been issued. and we
enjoyed the freedom from the convention of
collars. etc., very much.
The routine in camp is mainly as follows
The bugle blows Reveille at 6 a.m.• just when
one is deep in the most profound sleep imaginable,
for there is nothing like fresh air for
making one sleep like a log. The occupants of
each tent sit up on their straw-filled paillasses
and contemplate one another for a second or
two before ejaculating " Well 1 Welll!
Well! ! !" which is the recognised way of
starting a new day in the Army. Then the
various orderlies begin to buzz around-the
the Battn. Orderly-Sergeant and his Corporal,
to see that the Company Orderly-Sergeants are
doing their duty, that is. going round the
" lines." as the canvas streets are called, with
their authoritative shout of " Come away, No.
S tent! Get that flap open, No. II! All up
No. I7? Come, show a leg in there. No. 22 ! "
The Company Orderly Corporal must take
the names of the sick, lame and lazy. Then
the senior in each tent is meant to get busy and
insist on his men risi.ng and folding their beds
and blankets and rolling up the tent flaps, while
two from each tent (the mess orderlies for the
day) are despatched to the cook-house for
morning coffee. and biscuits. There is not
much time to consume these, get washed,
dressed and the tent tidied before morning
parade. \Vhen the markers are lined out, we
hurry on parade and the whole Battalion goes
off for what was at first considered a severe
double but which we would now think quite

THE OUTPOST.
19
insignificant. Then we go through some
evolutions in physical drill under Sergt-:Majors
or other instructors, soon hurrying back into
" Mass" to be dismissed for breakfast. This is
the interval usually used for shaving and the
other finer parts of the toilet for which we have
no time in the early morning.
Messing may be done in tents or, what was
much cheerier, in large marquees, where a great
jovial din was kicked IIp at every meal, varied
with such things as
A voice-" The squire has been foully
murdered I "
Chorus---" Shame! "
Voice--" And ve villain has escaped to
London with ye papers concealed in ye black
bag! "
Chorus-" Oh ! "
Voice-" Some say Laird has finger in pie! "
Chorus-" Ah I "
Voice-" But never mind these trivialities.
Let us hie to yonder Wet Canteen and have ye
ale with me ! "
Chorus-" Hurrah! "
Voice-- H
Exit the villagers."
Chorus-" Um-te-diddly, um-te-day,
We are the villagers, blithe and gay,
Um-te-didaly, um-te-day."
Or, " Bread and jam, bread and jam, bread
and jam again," to the old tunc.
On all the other parades throughout the day
we get squad drill with intervals, squad drill in
'Jingle rank, squad drill in two ranks, and all the
other variations of squad drill that E Coy. are
being treated to at present. One could write
volumes on life under canvas, but considerations
of Rpace limit one to a mere sketch. The
mention of such things as dixies to be washed,
lines to be cleaned, beds and kits to be put
outside, tents to be kept in order, rations to be
drawn, etc., etc., will bring the whole of that
glorious time back to the minds of many.
There is the Dry Canteen where one could buy
anything from a check for chips to a pair of sox,
the Wet Canteen where one drank one'3 modest
pint 0' bitter and enjoyed a good smoking
concert of an evening, the Guild Tent where
one could write letters, if he were lucky enough
to find a seat at a table, and Trvine or Troon
where we went to see a picture show. At
sunset the bugles blow "Retreat "-all
visitors must JerLYe the lines-the footballers
come in because it is getting too dark to see,
and soon the little village is lit up, for one must
have candles to play cards, write letters or
swot up the Red Book. At 9.30 p.m. "First
Post" is sounded, by which time all men should
be in their lines, and the thoughtful ones are
getting their beds down with a view to avoiding
trouble in the dark.
At 10 p.m. "Tattoo--Last Post" goes on
the bugle and by this time all Company Orderly
Sergeants have been round the tents, calling the
roll, so that they are ready to report "all
present" at the Tattoo Staff Parade. Everyone
now gets into pyjamas, helmets and
sleeping sox, ready to blowout the candle when
the bugle sounds" Lights Out "-10.15 p.m.
Such are the dry bones of the de:;;cription of
life under canvas. It would be impossible to
enumerate all the joyful little items that go to
make up one of n.e best forms of life one could
wish for.
CUEvALIlm.
The Recruit's Complaint.
I.
When we parted with our job,
And we took our Monarch's" bob,"
Then our thoughts of killing Germans gave us thrills,
But we're still put through the mill
Doing" Squad" and" Company" Drill,
And we fight and die upon Dundonald Hills!
n.
With our service rifles neat,
And our khaki all complete! ! ! !
We could see ourselves in Belgium right away.
Still no rifles 'mongst the lot,
But our khaki we have got
For we rub it on our belts 'most every day!
Ill.
Times we dream upon parade
Of a dreadful cannonade,
And we hear the shells go whistling out of sight!
Then we think that must be hell
Till the Sergeant starts to yell,
" Why the devil can't you dress up on the right! ! ! "
IV.
'When we left our girls in town
They were nearly breaking down,
But they told us to be brave and come back soon.
Now, if they only knew
That their lovers, brave and true,
'Were stilllearuing daily how to form Platoon'
V.
But of course it's only right
That we cannot hope to fight
Till we learn the military A B C,
Yet our souls are dead within
When the Sergeants rub it in,
" Now then smartly! Order Arr.ums!! One~Two
-Three ~ !!"
T. c.
t t t
Some one wants to know why Ayris out of bounds
without a pass. Tt is argued that the Government
clothes US and gives us food and drink, yet they
would deprive us of Ayr!

20 THE OUTPOST.
A lIeged Scarcity 0/ Girls.
IN view of the numerous complaints made by
the men and non-coms. (to mention no others)
as to the lamentable shortage of ladies of
youthful age in Troon, it was decided to hold a
meeting after Church Parade on Sunday,
~Ist January, to consider the matter and decide
what steps should be taken to bring about a
more satisfactory position.
The meeting was held in the commodious
premises of Giovanni M'Callum, Italian
Merchant, and there was almost a full
attendance of the Battalion. Some excitement
was caused by a rumour that disguised
officers were present, who had an interest in the
subject. This rumour was proved to be
unfounded through the remarkable presence of
mind of Sergeant Slobbie, who, in a loud voice,
ordered all present to salute. As everyone
saluted smartly and correctly, it was apparent
there were only privates and non-corns.
present.
The first business was the election of a
chairman. Numerous names were proposed,
but on its being pointed out that Private
Hartobeat (No. 271, Hillhead), had been
engaged three times and sued for breach of
promise twice, he was unanimously elected.
The chairman in explaining the objects of the
meeting, referred to the dullness which all the
unmarried men in the Battalion experienced in
the evenings. He' had several suggestions for
remedying affairs, but before making them, he
invited some of those present. to state their
views.
Lance-Corporal Osculate said that the
scarcity of girls was so pitiful in Troon that he
had almost forgotten what they tasted like.
He had been driven to devote his evenings to
"Infantry Training," and was so "fed up"
that he thought of applying for a commission.
Private Enterprise stated ,he had spoken to
several girls without the formality of an
introduction, and he was now in the unfortunate
position of being unable to meet more
than eight per week, with two houses per day
on Sunday. He thought the members of the
Battalion who had complained were lacking in
experience, and hoped they would prove better
soldiers than philanderers (cries of dissent).
Sergeant Nogood said that Private Enterprise
ought to be a Mohammedan. He had asked
several girls to walk out with him and was told
they were engaged every evening with privates.
He thought the sergeants should have a
preference in a matter of this kind, and was in
favour of restrictions being placed on privates
walking out girls.
When the uproar had been quelled, Private
Toogood expressed his dissatisfaction with
having to walk out" flappers" and nursemilids.
He said he felt humiliated, after having grown
the finest moustache in the Battalion, that the
best girls would not speak to him, preferring
clean-shaven men.
A discussion on moustaches which arose at
this point Was ruled out of order bv the
chairman.
•
Private Seely-Bate said the Battalion should
remember Lord Kitchener's advice. He
thought the meeting should request the O.C.
to hold more night marches, and then these
complaints would cease.
After Private Seely-Bate had been ejected (in
a damaged condition), Corporal Cute addressed
the meeting. He said he was not a ladies'
man (a voice, "Question! ") but he could
appreciate, to quote Shakespeare, It a bit of
fluff" now and again. Owing to the scarcity
of suitable material he had to devote his
evenings to nap, Milton and drink; and he felt
it would raise the moral and spiritual level of
the Battalion if more ladies were available.
Piper lWLucky said he had become engaged
to the finest girl in Scotland since coming to
Troon. (Loud cheers.) He hoped to repeat
this performance several times before leaving
it. (" Shame I")
Private Sparkes said he thought they were
wasting time discussing the matter further.
For his part, he had been forced to import
" the goods" from Glasgow, with very happy
results, and he advised others to follow the
same course.
Private Prospector said he knew of several
excellent " lines" in Prestwick and Ayr, and
would be very pleased to introduce any private
who cared. (Loud and prolonged applause.)
Finally it was agreed on the motion of the
chairman to postpone taking any steps until
after a consultation with the 15th Royal Scots,
who would doubtless act with them in the
matter.
, After singing "Who were you with last
night? " the meeting dispersed.
M. L.
A REAL "food by the way" to give stamina,
is Bovril Chocolate, and by partaking of a cake
or two during forced marches, there is a
tendency to alleviate fatigue. It is a delicious
confection of vanilla flavour, blended with the
nutritious constituents of Bovril, and b~ing put
up in silver paper Id. packets, takes up but
little room in the knapsack.
A great personage asked if the men of a certain
company were recruited principally from mining
districts. Can you guess who the colliers are?

THE OUTPOST.
21
A COMPANY.
SRORTLY after Britain's declaration of war on
Germany, Dr. Wilson and Mr. Agnew, both of the
Chemistry Department of the Royal Technical
College, opened a recruiting office in the College
prernis~s with the idea of raising a College
Battahon, but on the suggestion of the War Office
it was decided to merge the Tee. men with the
stalwarts who were being marshalled by the Glasgow
Chamber of Commerce.
A Company is almost wholly composed of
Technical College men. and their College motto,
"Mente et Manu," which might be freely translated,
"Brain and Brawn," is really indicative of this
Company.
There havebeenandare fewer sick in this Company
than in any other in the Battalion, which speaks
well for their brawn, and there have been more
N.C.O.s drawn from their platoons than from the
others. Their ranks have been depleted lately of
privates and N.C.O.s, who were transferred to other
platoons, but there is good stuff left, and an early
application for unattached stripes is necessary.
Major J. W. Paul first held the command of the
Company at its inception, and while he was acting
Adjutant in Troon, the direction devolved on
Captain W. M. Morton, who, much to. the regret
of the premier four platoons, has been transferred
to another Company. Captain J. M'M. Mitchell
is now the O.C., and the Tec. boys are doing well.
Lieutenant Neilson, of Rugby international fame,
has also been transferred. The other Companies
need the best, so we let them have it. A Company
seems to possess an intangible personality, very
loveable apparently, for the Battalion pets, official
and unofficial, human and canine, are attached, or
have attached themselves to it. Judy, an alleged
is more or less the Company pet, as she belongs
to Sergeant.Major, but every route march sees
A on the tramp accompanied by all its pets-buglers,
pipers, and its dumb admiring canine friends-a
pomeranian, two fox terriers, a retriever and J udy.
Goodness only knows who tells the tykes what time
the parade is; they are more promptly on the
ground than some of the" bhoys." The President
of the Tec. StUdents' Representative Council, six
feet four of him, is in No. 2 Platoon, and the Tec.
Magazine Assistant and Art Editor is in Xo. 3
Platoon. In fact, if we had a professor or two in
the Company it would seem just like the old days in
George Street. Sergeant Drummond, of Xo. 3
platoon, won the shooting prize among the
Battalion experienced shots, and all the Company
Signallers have won their flags. From the four
Platoons there could be produced experts of all
kinds-company promoters, doctors, lawyers,
engin~ers, chemists, architects, artists, poets,
mUSICIanS, and an honest man. The Company
has brains, and as often as the Battalion wants
them they are ungrudgingly given, whether for
soldiering, athletic or social purposes, their motto
being" Although you can never be like us, be as
like us as you ever can be." The notes ofB, C, D
and E Companies shadow forth their excellencies
in a faint phosphorescent light, and that light, in
toto, raised to the nth power, is what might be
flashed about A Company.
'*' '*' t
B COMPANY.
TRE following notes will justify the "Schools'
Company's" claim to being the best in the
Battalion. Our first platoon, No. 5, is composed
mainly of old boys of Glasgow High Scllool, and the
school motto, "H;.x;c Summa est" is true of this
platoon, as it is of the whole Company. Of course,
some people would like to translate the motto as
" This is the limit!" but we prefer to take it in its
original significance-" Above all." 1"0. 6 Platoon
has as its basis the former pupils of Allan Glen's
School. They are a jolly, happy-go-Iucky-dare.
devil crowd, and their" Remarks by the way" are
a treat. while they are particularly hot stuff at
"Soccer." Hillhead High School is very strongly
r:presented in No. 7 Platoon, and they certainly
hve up to the school motto, " Je maintiendrai "in
every respect. Robust and spirited, they are in
everything and have staying powers. The
spirit and traditions old school hold them
together and they will stick anything and stick at
nothing. No. 8 Platoon is the Glasgow Academicals'.
They are hard working, keen and ambitious,
as shown by the fact of the 36 members of
B Company who have attained commissioned rank,
nearly twenty were from No. 8 Platoon, eleven of
these being appointed to our own Battalion. Vie
need not dwell on the athletic qualities of this
platoon, as these are already well known. In
addition to the schools mentioned we have in B
Company representatives from most of the best
known schools in Scotland. Our Officers are also
.. Schools" men, for Major Young and Lieut. Orr
are Glasgow Academicals; Captain Hussell was
educated at Hillhead High School and Glasgow
Academy; Lieut. Begg is a Fettesian; Lieut.
Morton was educated at Kelvinside Academy, while
Lieut. Scott hails from Charterhouse.
Many of" ours" have former military experience,
some in the Corps of their respective schools, while
the University O.T.C. and Territorial Force have
also their quota in our Company.
Since the Battalion left Gailes in October,
numerous changes have taken place in B Company.
In respect of promotions our Company Commander,
Captain]. R. Young was gazetted Major, Lieut.
G. V. M. Boyd from command of No. 5 Platoon has
been posted to second in command of A Company,
while Sergeant T. P. Locking was gazetted
to a commission in the Battalion, and subsequently
appointed Adjutant.
In the beginning of November Lieut. F. D.
Morton, C Comp:ny, was transferred to B Company
and posted to 1"0. 8 Platoon, thus making up the

22
THE OUTPOST.
complement of B Company officers at that date.
Lieut. H. Orr has now been posted to No. 5 Platoon,
vice Lieut. Boyd.
By their transfer to E Company of Sergeants
Lang and Dobbie, and Corporals Wright and
M'Cluskie, B Company loses four promising young
N.C.O.s.
In the recent Miniature Range Competition B
Company headed the prize list, and Private Peters
of B Company registered the highest individual
score in the Battalion for the No. :2 Competition.
Of the 35 who qualified in the No. I Competition to
shoot in further Bat,talion Competition, 17, or 50
per cent., were from B Company, and B Company
had also the largest number who qualified in No. :2
Competition. 'While this is satisfactory, much
remains to be done to bring up the standard of
shooting in the Company, and same would be
improved by men acting on C.-S.-M. M'Luskie's
advice to practice aiming and snapping on every
possible occasion, both indoors and outside.
During the winter B Company has taken a
prominent part in the athletic and social functions
of the Battalion. The Regimental Rugby team,
still undefeated, is principally composed of B
Company men, and the Company is also represented
in the Regimental Association Football team. The
outstanding man of B Company, both in Rugby and
Association Football, has been Private A. D. Laird
(since gazetted to a commission in the Battalion).
Of others who played well in B Company mention
must be made of Sergeant Reith and Privates
Fraser and Pattison in the Rugby games, and of
Corporal Brown in the Association games.
A Battalion Hockey Club is now being formed,
for which a good number of B Company have
handed in their names, amongst whom are some
players of note, including Lance-Corporal Summers,
who got his International Trial and but for illness
would have been an Internationalist.
A t the various concerts B Company has been well
to the front, and special mention falls to be made
of the excellent performances given by C.-Q.-M.-S.
\Villiams, Sergeants Cohen amI MacArthur and
Private Marr (since gazetted to a commission in the
Battalion).
In the Troon Parish Church on the 17th Dec.,
191,1', was solemnised the wedding of Lieut. F. D.
Morton, B Company, to Miss M. Begg (sister of
Lieut. Begg, B Company). No. 8 Platoon formed
the Guard of Honour, and the remainder of the
Company were present at the ceremony.
B Company could also raise a first-class WaleI'
Polo team, as many players of note are ill Hj()
Company, mainly from the Western and Arlington
Clubs.
C COMPANY.
C COMPANY are still congratulating themselves.
\Vhen we were marching through a village in the
neighbourhood of Troon on a recent route march,
as C CorripaIlY passed, an interested onlooker was
overheard to remark, "These is the boys as can
march!" The Company mentioned, however, is
quite charitably inclined to the suggestion that it
was the Battalion as a whole which elicited the
laudatory remark, and not anyone Company in
particular.
This reminds us of the remark of a Kilmarnock
"dame," who, with Herculean arms folded was
standing at the roadside critically surveying the
passing scene-or was it the passing" uniforms"­
as the Battalion marched through that town; the
remark was addressed to the Rear Guard
Connecting-files, of whose duty she was apparently
ignorant. Their detached position was misunderstood,
and, her sympathy aroused, she addressed
them in a voice full of pathos, "Puir craters, are
yez tired ? "
No 9 Platoon are fast losing the reputation they
once possessed of being an excellent singing
platoon. Not only has the talent apparently
deteriorated, but their once ascetic taste seems
also to have gone, as a recent effort was greeted by
the Company Commander by " March at attention."
It seems a pity that the Platoon Football Matches
inaugurated at Gailes were not continued here at
Troon, and carried to a definite conclusion. Two
games were then played, but the winners have
never met to decide the championship of the
Company. Could the tournament not be started
anew, as there have been so many transfers lately?
It may be recalled, too, that one platoon, at least,
has a football to win, if successful. Besides the
Platoon Matches there are many in the Company
who would like to see a C team pitted against teams
representing the other Companies of the Battalion.
By the way, have the Royal Scots any pretentions ?
" There is a little soldier boy
Whose Company is C,
He trips along, oh! so coy!
A dam-I mean, a dancer be should be.
, Tears' are wept when the pace is hot,
And he's breathless, ev'n on the level.
He gets many a nasty word unsought,
For example-" Get on-."
LWe shall not go any further with this.-Ed.]'
Many have passed the opinion that C Company
probably possesses one of the best pli}toons in the
Battalion as far as Rifle Exercises are concerned.
At the recent inspection by the Brigadier, the latter
was particularly well pleased with the show made by
the Platoon mentioned. If it does show any
excellence it is assuredly due, to a great extent, to
the zeal displayed by its enthusiastic Commander.
D COMPANY.
THE appearance of D Company on parade, it is
generally understood, was responsible for that
appreciative and original comment, " A fine body
of men."
Rugby and Hockey seem the order of the day,
but what is the matter with" Soccer?" How's that
galaxy of talent spending its Saturday afternoons
that in the peaceful days of yore thnlled many a
football crowd in Glasgow? It's in the Company,
but alas! not of it. Come on, Mac, gather your
stalwarts together, doff your "good blue suits"
and you']] find no lack of challengers.
" Keep the step, keep the step" is.a chorus that
has been ehanted recently to a partIcular platoon
en route, but surely he was a malicious individual
who reminded them that there were only two steps.
---~'~--~'----

THE OUTPOST.
23
It was a wounded soldier discharged from Troon
Hospital and travelling home in the train who said,
that after examining the trenches dug by each
Company he considered those delved by D easily
the best. Come! this is gratifying, and with a
platoon of " colliers" in the Battalion, too! !
At the Miniature Range on \Vednesday, January
20, Private A. C. Thompson, of No. I3 Platoon,
plugged a hole in the" bull" with his five shots
that was covered by a threepenny bit. A record
performance we should say.
The men of No. I4 Platoon were brightening the
way by a series of vocal efforts, amongst them
being that somewhat misleading refrain :~
Inoculation, inoculation,
Its the cause of all the trouble,
Cause of all the p'ain.
When you're lying in your bed
And you're very nearly dead,
I ts through inoculation every time.
The Colonel riding beside the platoon noticing
a discrepancy in its truthfulness, suggested its
revision to­
" When you're lying in your bed
You're enjoying yourself top.hole."
'While the platoon mentioned is always anxious
to keep within the limits of truth it cannot do so
at the expense of rhyme, so until the Battalion poet
can make "top-hole" rhyme with" bed" we are
afraid the original rendition must stand. It is
possible that the author of this ballad was justified
inasmuch as he was inoculated on a Saturday.
During one of the bloodless battles that in these
days range round the Dundonald Hills, all was not
going well with the attacking force. The defenders,
under cover, in the intervals of a vigilant look-out
were playing nap and surreptitiously partaking of
lunch. The order came to temporarily suspend
hostilities, and scouts were called up and despatched
in all directions to seek a lost attacking platoon. It
turned up eventually and was found to have strayed
owing to some" last man" not having shut a gate.
'Die Company wit said, " Let the battle proceed,"
and was instantly shot. Hostilities did
recommence, however, not that the defenders
stopped lunching or nap, but in the interim the
other attacking platoon had at great pains
manceuvred itself into a fine position-from the
defenders' point of view-and its annihilation was
only a matter of minutes. This put the
extinguisher on operations and the attackers said
the battle was a draw! We hear there is talk of a
notice heing displayed on the Hills to the effect that
platoons must be led by a cord or chain.
E COMPANY.
THE formation of the" youngsters," as we were
aptly christened by Sergeant-Major Kelly on the
occasion of tbe Brigadier-General's inspection, gave
rise to considerable discussion throughout the
Battalion.
As many of the other Companies were over
strength, it was known that several of the N.C.O.s
and men would have to be transferred to the new
Company to form the nucleus of its strength.
The fact that transference meant possibly more
of the disliked squad drill, had a great deal to do
with the slight feeling of dissatisfaction created
amongst those who had been chosen to form the
backbone of the fifth company. It was only
natural that after having been in certain Companies
since the raising of the Battalion, men should be
rather disinclined to view their removal from their
friends with pleasure. True, in a regiment such as
ours, all are pals, still many of those friendships,
which on the march and in drill, mean such a lot,
were broken. In addition, men of the other
Companies were on occasion rather hard in their
remarks, the result being that at first the men of
E Company lacked that feeling of interest in their
work which is so essential to the success of the
Company, either on parade or in manceuvres.
The enthusiasm of the Officers, and their efforts
to make the Company equal, if not better than the
other four, soon had its effect however, and infected
the men to such an extent, that at present very few
are desirous of rejoining their original Companies.
The recruits which have now been drafted into
the various platoons of the Company are particularly
efficient, considering the short period of their
training. Some of them are splendid specimens
of manhood, while the majority are well up to the
standard as regards height and physical fitness.
Since the beginning of the month the Company
has been taking part in the Battalion manceuvres,
and has successfully defended many positions
against other Companies.
In sports E is strong, and the" Soccer" Team
gives promise of being an excellent one. Several
of the men are also of tried ability in the running
field, and will make a creditable show in crosscountry
work.
Finally it might be mentioned that the excellent
spirit of camarederie which exists between all ranks
is due in no small measure to the popularity of
Major Auld, our Commanding Officer.

24 THE OUTPOST.
MAGAZINE NOTICE.
\VE have no lack of talent in the Battalion, and we
sincerely trust that men who possess
Contributions. the gift of writing prose and verse,
and of drawing, will. send in their
work at once. \Ve want articles in serious
vein as well as the humorous, and don't delay the
turning out of MSS. because you think that there
must be so many others who are doing it. This
Magazine is not something created out of nothing,
but should be the product of you all. It is no one's
monopoly, and the more minds that go to its
make·up, the more interesting it will be. \Ve may
be an armed camp, but we don't wish to be
absolutely military and nothing else. Contributions
for the March number should be in our hands not
later than the 25th February, and the sooner the
better. Carpe diem.
THE Magazine Committee, consisting of two
members from each Company, have eleeted the
undernoted office· bearers :­
Editor-Sergt. S. D. REITH.
Sub.Editors-Corpl. GRIFFITHS.
Pte. W. HUTCHESON.
Art Editor-Pte. J. CHAPMAN.
Finance 1l1anager-Sergt. A. FERGUSON.
Contributions in prose and verse are solicited on
all subjects. and we would appeal to every member
of the Battalion to assist, especially with short
notes for the columns under the various headings,
Everything submitted will receive careful
consideration. Contributors will facilitate the.
work of. the Editorial staff by attending to the
undernoted suggestions :­
\Vrite on one side of the paper only.
Write in ink, and legibly.
Use sheets of uniform size.
Magazine is most suitable.
Paper the size of the
Leave a good margin on the left hand side for
Editorial corrections and remarks.
Sketches should be in black ink only, on white
stiff paper, and on separate sheets. '
Address all correspondence relaHng to Literary
matters to Editor, " Outpost," Dunreggan, Troon.
Advertisements and Finance to be addressed to
Finance Manager at same address.
crlie dportsman's emporium,
103 St. Vincent Street, GLASGOW.
The
Leading
Cricket
Croquet
Golf Tennis Hockey
House
for
Football
Chess
Dominoes Parlour Games
And all other SPORTING and ATHLETIC GOODS.
Telephone No, Central 8895.

THE OUTPOST.
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"
No. 2. MARCH. 1915.
THE Highland Light Infantry, briefly and
more commonly referred to as the H.L.I.,
is a corps to which any man may well be
proud to belong, holding, as it does, an
honourable position in the roll of Scottishfighting
men and possessing a record of more than a
hundred years' useful service for King and
Country.
Originally raised, under the title of the 7ISt
Foot, about the middle of the 18th century, its
career was at first a somewhat chequered one,
no fewer than four distinct regiments being
formed and disbanded within a comparatively
short period. The fifth, which formed the
nucleus of the present H.L.I., was known at first
as Macleod's Highland Regiment of Foot, and
afterwards as the Glasgow Highland Light
Infantry; this was the only occasion, prior to
the present time, on which the word
" Glasgow" has been included as part of the
name of a corps of " regulars."
The first of these regiments had an existence
of five years, serving in the 'Vest Indies and at
the siege of Belleisle. The second, which, like
its predecessor, was known as the" 7ISt," was
disbanded after only one year in being. The
third, raised by the Master of Lovat, under the
the name of Fraser's Highlanders, lasted for
seven years and saw much arduous service in
the American War of Independence; whilst
the fourth, of which the sllrvivors of the
American campaign formed the greater part,
was disbanded very shortly after its inception,
without having an opportunity of testing its
quality.
Since the raising of the fifth regiment.
however, which took place about the end of the
18th century, the H.L.I. has had a continuous
and successful career.
The elephant shown on our regimental badge
tells of service in India, the word " Assaye "
commemorating tlle deeds of the highlanders
in one of the earlier victories of the Duke of
Wellington. Further laurels were won in the
Peninsular campaign, the H.L.l. being chiefly
responsible for the fortunate issue of the Battle
of Vittoria. It was in this engagement that
the famous order was given to "Charge 'em
down the Gallowgate "~an order which
appealed at once to the Glasgow soldiers. The
victorv was, however, marred for the Scottish
lads by the loss of their Colonel, the Honourable
Henry Cadogan, who fell mortally wounded in
the charge that gained the day.
Notable in Ollr regimental annals is the
heroic behaviour of the officers and men on the
ill-fated troopship Birkenhead, when, sending

26
THE OUTPOST.
the women and children to the boats, the
soldiers lined up on the deck of the sinking
vessel and calmly met their death in the raging
ocean.
In the South African War, too, the H.L.l.
had a share, one battalion taking part with the
Highland Brigade in the battle of Magersfontein;
whilst for evidence of more recent
activities of our famous regiment it is only
necessary to examine from day to day the
various newspaper accounts of the progress of
the European War. The Victoria Cross has
already been gained by an H.L.I. private, and
the all too heavy list of H.L.l. casualties tells of
stern work by our comrades in the fighting line.
Truly the new Battalions of " Glasgow's Own"
are endowed with a goodly heritage of tradition,
a tradition which, if signs and portents count
for anything, they may be trusted to carry on
not only worthily but with added lustre.
In Memoriam.
t t t
TEDDY, A POMERANIAN.
THE spring has come and primroses appear
Among the sylvan glades of Fullarton,
Arboreal minstrels hymn the verdant year,
And shall your memory be sung by none?
You loved to foot the wintry Aryshire miles
Alongside us-marching a thousand strong­
Nosing through fences, gates and rustic stiles,
Or trotting to the rhythm of our song.
That you should like us was a compliment
Not wasted on the fellows whom you took
As new-found comrades, though you came and went
As pleased yourself, without a bark or look.
You never tired on the hard Scots road,
But ran from A. to E. just as you pleased;
Now Pluto has you in his dark abode, .
Your vagrant rambles in this life have ceased.
Somewhere, perhaps, beyond our narrow creeds,
In happy hunting-grounds invisible,
You trot, with other warrior-loving breeds,
After heroic legions-who can tell?­
At great Achilles' vulnerable heel,
Caressed by Hector and Miltiades.
Loved by that Cresar slain by Brutus' steel.
In gardens sweet as the Hesperides.
Haply you hear our. pipers as they pace
.Nearby the spot whereon the vicious horse
Kicked you to death, and hear the big drum's bass
Awake the echoes o'er your little corse.
One pet the less we mourn, we liked you, all ;
The time is spring, the countryside is fair,
You'll come no more when goes tile bugle-caU
Along the Corraith road-your grave is there.
W. J. F.H.
Blaw Doon the Pipes.
BLA\V doon your bannie pipes, my men,
For feet are feelin' fain
To follow ye doon any path,
To hell and back again.
We'll hear the blast sugh through the pines,
The slogan for the charge,
The skite 0' steel on armoured men,
The claymore on the targe,
Fine are the lilts M'Crimmon made
To suit the tramp 0' men,
Wha trysted on the mountain side,
Frae mony a misty glen.
We'd hear the pibroch owre the storm,
That sped the fiery cross,
That roused the shiel and c1achan up,
Frae \Vigtonshire to Ross.
Gi'e us the tunes our faithers' lo'ed,
Airs generations auld,
'Which raise up something in the heart
That tongue has never tauld.
There's war in ye, there's love in ye,
There's feast and dance and death,
And wi' your skirlin' in our ears
\Ve'lI spend our hindmaist breath.
Blaw doon your bonnie pipes, my men,
And head us to the fray,
Our guid right hands will stronger be
For tunes tile pipers play.
Wha are the villains daur withstand
Our bayonets, shairp and fell,
\Vhen wi' your notes we'd charge the deiI
Right through the gates 0' helll
H.
t t t
The Deserter.
From the German poem hy Chamisso.
rThe poem referii to a soldier who deserted~ was caught. and
condemned to be shot. 1 he deserter was the only friend of
one of the hand of nine men who cGmpo:;ed the firing party.]
THEY march to drum of muffled beat:
How broad the square, how long the street!
Would all were past, and he at rest;
My heart is sad and sore distressed!
In this wide world, my only friend,
\Vhom now to meet his death they sena.
The rolling drum calls for parade,
The strict command must be obeyed.
One long last look upon the place,
Bathed in God's beautiful sun's rays,
His eyes are bound, he cannot see­
" God grant eternal rest to thee! "
Good aim the band of nine men took,
But eight through pain and pity shook;
Nine shots were fired, but eight went wide,
By mine, the ninth, my one friend died.
A. D. H. S.

,THE OUTPOST,
27
f
Plwto . h
A Route M arch.
Pte . .4. U. Dt'all~.
M O I\:\I:\ G d;l\l' II $, a.nd \"ith it the prom isc o f mom nl!:; ' eas\" to dis c u ~ ' \\'ith your pals la: t
;1 glo ri ous d;I\'. The winter ~ un is s hi nin g ni ghl's fortunes at nap or lh · latest in . lines. '
fortit

28 THE 0 TlO::;T,
Down, uown 'o u go, sk irting the IV ods a nd
pasl the quarry, a nd now yo u approach thot
fashionable countr ' vi Ilag of Dundonald, bu l
you du not en ler; you turn sharply to the ri h t ,
iUld now 'ou know >( II a rc lIlaking iur
Symington. On yo u gu. t ra mp, trmnp, traIIIP,
past fi Id and J r ·'s t, up hill a nd d own dale,
llll li l Y()U cOlll e within sight of this v illage o f
Sy mingtol1, famed for its acrubclti ' ,,"0l1l 11;
but you don't !';tol' here, although Hl inn has a
t;m -dizi ng look for a thirsty s Id ier. Thl!
pipe ar playing 11011', ,u ld you Illcu-ch th roug h
t.he vi ll :1g a lll! s wing out into the I'::il marnock
road, I\' lpre you agai n enjoy a I ric f h,LiL.
lunch, 'Lnd yuu sit down a ncl cal 'OUI san"wi ·11 '~,
dreaming

THE OUTPOST. 29
TTALI~.N [JOTES
~ I:
SIX months is not a long period measured on the
three. score years. and - ten principle. but it
seems a far cry back to those early days when we
pamded at. the various drill halls in Glasgow, full
of the novelty of emancipation from desk, workshop
and warehouse, and, in obedience to The Call, eager
to set about the business of soldiering. The transition
had been sudden. and it was a Battalion of
very green and very raw recruits which was initiated
into the rudiments of squad drill hy our Sergeant­
Majors.
We have travelled" some" in the interval and
novelty nas given place to the actualities of training.
We are still, perhaps, little more than recruits in
Army terminology, but the last v@stige of ink has
gone from. our fingers, and the noise of the
workshop no longer assails our ears.
The months have been a record of change. Faces
familiar have disappeared and new ones have come
in to take their places. The old bogey of squad
drill has done its worst-or best--and has been
relegated to the limbo of the past. In its stead has
come a daily round of duties more varied and
exciting. At home and afield rough corners have
been smoothed down, and in the multifarious
details of drill, deportment and manreuvre, the
adept stage has, in the main, been reached.
In these notes last month we brought the
chronology of our doings up to the end of January,
including the Brigadier-General's Inspection on the
Polo Ground, on 22nd January. Shortly after this
the II7th Infantry Brigade Office was opened in
Troon, and we commenced to train as a unit in the
Brigade, supervised from Brigade Headquarters,
rather than as an independent battalion. "Ve are
brigaded with the 15th and I6th (Service) Battalions
H.LL (1St and 2nd Glasgow) who are stationed at
Gailes, and the I5th (Service) Battalion Royal
Scots (1st Edinburgh) who arrived in Troon early
in the year. The London Gazette refers to appoint.
ments on our Brigade Staff as follows :-Brigade
C.ommander: Col. Frederick Hacket·Thomson, C.B.,
to be temporary Brigadier-General, dated 5th
January; Brigade Major: Captain Henry L. \Vood,
The Oxfordshire and Buckinghamshire Light
Infantry, and to be seconded, dated 8th January,
I915·
On February 2nd, Sergeant-Instructor Shuttle,
Army Gymnast. arrived in Troon to take up duty
with our Battalion. This brings our list of guests
up to the large total of two, the other being Sergeant
Halliday of the Cameron Highlanders, who reported
here for dnty some time before Christmas, when he
was just home from service in India. The advent
of these two experienced soldiers in our midst has
heen a distinct gain to the Battalion and we hope
they will long continue with us.
Early in February our Brigade Captain, the Hon.
Captain Drummond, made his appearanceln Troon,
and since then we have been fortunate enough to
benefit by his first·hand knowledge of manreuvres.
He is just home from the Front, so the suggestions
he makes in his courteous, kindly way are bound
to be valuable. On February I2th he delivered a
lecture to the officers and sergeants of the two
battalions stationed in Troon, viz. :-the I7th
H.L.l. and the 15th R.S. On the 24th the officers
and sergeants of the whole Brigade met in the
Unionist Rooms and listened to a very fine lecture
on Tactics by the Brigadier.General.
Special company field training was commenced
on the I5th February and since then the various
companies have been, and are doing, training by
themselves over certain prescrihed areas. Each
company, as it'l turn occurs for this manreUvTe
practice, is relieved of all duties and also from tile
.early morning parade during. that week. The
weather since this training began has been rather
inimical to this work and has occasionally atrophied
the manreuvres. \Ve are so hardened now that we
can stick anything, however, and take soakings as
all in the day's work.
The Outpost has made its debut and we feel sure
that future numbers will require neither introduction
nor apology. Its trial run having proved it an
unparalleled success, the Battalion Magazine now
takes its place among the standard journals of the
day. The first number, signed and autographed,
was sold by auction on the Parade Ground, on
February I8th, in aid of the Belgian Relief Fund.
;yrajor Paul was the highest hidder at £4 IOS. and he
gained the copy. Knowing that many others
coveted the book, he very kindly handed it back to
the Magazine staff to be raffled. The draw took
place on March 8th, and the lucky winner was
Private T. Bruce, C Company.
We had long looked forward to the days when we
would get service equipment. A large consign.
ment has now arrived, and from February 20th
onwards it has been in process of being issued, so
~hat probably by the time this appears in print, the
whole Battalion will be complete with field service
kit. On the route-marches every Monday and
Thursday, our distances varying from fifteen to
twenty miles, we wear full marching order and look
and feel very much more like soldiers.

30
-----------------------------------------_.-._­
THE OUTPOST.
The Great Idea.
OXE Saturday recently, I arrived in Glasgow
duly provided with that talisman, Army
Form B 295, entitling me to be absent from my
quarters until the following Monday morning.
Leaving the arrival platform in St. Enoch's,
with its odour of spilt milk, I passed quickly
through the streets, which formed my lunchhour
promenade in degenerate civilian days,
until my steps brought me to the Picture House
entrance, where I was astonished to find Alison
in waiting.
Do not imagine that I would have you believe
that the meeting was unpremeditated. I hasten
to state that it had been arranged some days
previously. My astonishment was entirely due
to Allson's punctuality. She is the proud
possessor of a wristlet watch, one of those pretty
tovs which are more suited for ornament than
utility. In addition, she is a firm believer in
its time-keeping powers, and places little faith
in Greenwich Observatory in consequence.
Having greeted her with my best salute, a
salute worthy of the Field Marshal who guards
the portals of the Picture House, I was
admonished for my unp1,lnctuality. This
rebuke I accepted in all humility, well knowing
that to argue with Alison regarding time is to
court defeat. I said nothing, but led the
way up the marble staircase to the lounge.
Over our tea we proceeded to discuss the
latest news regarding friends on active service
or in training. By and by, I was .permitted to
deliver a long monologue on the all-absorbing
topic of " our" Battalion's doings at Troon.
Then I asked her what she thought of the first
number of The Outpost. Of course, I had sent
her a copy.
" Oh, quite good," she said, condescendingly,
" but there was something wanting."
.. What was that?" I queried.
" Well, if you consider the number of copies
which must have been sent to lady friends,
don't you think you might have given over a
page or so to them? "
:' You forget that it is a Battalion magazine,"
I said. "It is written by ourselves for
ourselves."
.. But also for your friends," parried Alison.
" The Editor says so."
.. Yes, that's true," I admitted. "I had
forgotten that bit. Of course, as a record of
our doings, it might be said to fulfil that
purpose, and then you have forgotten the
article on the" Alleged Scarcity of Girls."
AIison raised her eyebrows disdainfully ...
" What would vou have," I ventured after a
jUdicious pause.. " A fa.'ihion page? "
" I hadn't thought of that altogether," she
said vaguely. "But now that you mention it,
why not? Fashions are really becoming quite
military. It's a Great Idea."
" Perhaps, but then who could write such a
page? "
"Couldn't vou do it," she suggested,
brightening at the thought. "All you have to
do is to study the shops. Didn't you tell me
that you had been acting as observer? "
I weakly admitted that such was the case,
but did not dare to explain that the nature of
such duties would not necessarily help me to
write an article on women's dress.
"I can take vou and show vou the latest
styles in the shop windows," she continued,
" and you can make notes. It's rather a pity
that the shops are closed for the half-holiday,
because they don't always put the absolutely
exclusive things in the windows."
I breathed a sigh of relief at awful possibilities
avoided.
"Afterwards I will give you some help
towards knocking the notes into shape. YOll
can draw a bit, can't you? I have some
illustrated fashion papers that will be useful."
I saw visions of my arriving with a bundle of
such papers at the billet that is presently my
home.
" The first thing to note," Alison went on
remorselessly, "is that shorter skirts will be
worn and that thev will be wider and, in some
cases, kilted." ­
" \Vhen I was last on leave you complained
that my steps were so long that you couldn't
keep pace with me," I said.
Alison ignored my remark and continued:
" Tunics are certain to become popular."
" I should say that they are so at present,"
I interrupted flippantly.
Again I was ignored.
" In many cases they will be braided,"--­
" Not quite service dress," I suggested.
" Coloured sashes will be much worn."
"Khaki and grey are the colours most
favoured by the Allies," I put in mildly.
" I wish you wouldn't interrupt! Heally,
I don't think you are listening properly. If
you don't llsten, how can you expect to
remember what I am telling you?"
In some ways I rather like to quarrel with
Alison. It is really good sport making it up
again, but a week-end is not a long enough time
to carry it through properly, so I remained
silent.
" Zouave effects may be expected, and also
high boots of a somewhat Hussian pattern,"
she proceeded, commencing to draw on her
gloves.
" Shall we do the pictures now?" I asked.
"No," she said emphatically. "We shall
require the rest of the afternoon to study the
shop wfndows."
J

THE OllTPOST.
31
1 paid my check at the cash desk and Alison
led the way into Sauchiehall Street.
I have a confused recollection of innumerable
shop windows filled with lay figures in semi·
military dress. One particular outfit remains
in my memory-a vision in a khaki tunic, with
breast and hip pockets, a sash combining the
colours of the Allies, a tartan kilted-skirt, and,
crowning all, a velvet fatigue cap. If these are
the fruits of war, let us have peace! Though
our young men have of necessity donned
military garb, r see no reason for our girls to
follow suit. We should like to return and find
them as feminine as we left them.
By the time we had boarded a westward·
bound car at Charing Cross, I was more tired
than I have been after a day's route·marching.
I was at long-last able to appreciate the temper
of our women folk at the end of an afternoon's
shopping.
" Alison," I said at length, being determined
to keep up, at least, a show of interest on the
subject of fashions, " You haven't said whether
blue is to be popular this Spring. It's the naval
colour, you know, not to speak of the Commercial
Battalion."
" What a pity you weren't in town when
the • Pearl Girl' was at the King's," said
Alison. "It was ripping."
I saw her again on Sunday afternoon, but
Spring fashions did not form the topic of
conversation.
Having safely caugb-t the seven o'clock train
on Monday morning, I spent the journey to
Troon considering whether I was bold enough
to write that ladies' page, but my courage
failed me. These lines, however, bear witness
of my loyalty to Alison's Great Idea--or was it
my own?
OBSEHVER,
I used to know a little maid,
A blossom fair,
With eyes a laughing brownish shade.
'Vith lips that seemed for kisses made,
And finer than an old brocade
Her silken hair.
Her smiles and frowns she threw on all,
Like an expert;
And though but ten years old, and small,
The host of gallants she could call
To hold her fan, her glove, her shawl­
The little flirt!
I used to be her willing slave,
Ah! happy lot!
She scolded, did I misbehave,
Then turned at once and quite forgave,
Because she had a boon to crave-
The artful tot!
And we were just as chummy then
As churns could be ;
Oft do I remember when
She wished that I were only ten,
Because, she said, she hated men-
All men but me !
But time has passed, and year by year
We both have aged:
She's now eighteen, or very near,
A reigning belle, calm and severe,
Then, too, what makes it seem more (lucer,
She's now engaged!
Sometimes I wonder if she thinks
Of days when she
And I were mates in childish jinks.
Ah, no! she's now a frozen Sphinx
For she's engaged, the little minx,
Engaged to me ! ! I
J. M'K,
" They also serve who only stand and wait,"
Thev also stand who only wait and serve;
Milton was right, but we would tell him straight,
'Waiting and standing need a tombstone's nerve.
* * '* '* *
Someone ventured to explain that "echelon"
was a little animal that changes its colour.
* * * * *
A Battalion hair cut is all the rage. It is
suggested that if our tonsorial artist was to set up
business as a cushion stuffer he'd make a fortune.

32 THE OUTPOST.
A COMPANY have in Sergeant-l\Jajor William
Dobbie an ideal soldier, who knows everything
worth learning about soldiering and its
multitudinous requirements. In a newly
recruited Battalion of young civilians, whose
erstwhile experience of military efficiency was
practically nothing, the constant attention of a
thoroughly good, old campaigner is necessary
to produce the best results, and all ranks of
A Company can testify to the application of
brains and initiative on the part of Sergeant­
Major Dobbie.
This keen soldier has spent sixteen years in
the Royal Scots, and holds the necessary
militarv certificates for all-round efficiency.
For a period of five years he was the Vigilant
instructor to the well-known Dumbarton
.Mounted Infantry Company, and under his
constant supervision they attained to a high
standard of military efficiency, which was
commendably remarked upon by those who
knew what work had been expended on their
development.
During the South African Vvax our S.-M. was
in the thick of hostilities, and was kept busy at
the siege of \'{epener, for which he was granted
the decoration, a somewhat rare distinction,
which is held bv less than a hundred British
soldiers, another'wearer being a member of the
Battalion, Sergeant-Master-Cook Mather.
S.-M. Dobbie is a noted shot. In I903 he
had the honour of compiling the best individual
score in the Queen Victoria Cup, which is
keenly competed for by the British Army at
home and abroad. The three following years
he was a member of the Army Sixty, and also
represented the Scottish Regiments in their
team matches. The Royal Scots Shooting
Team under his captaincy won many handsome
trophies, and made themselves prominent at
all Rifte Meetings.
On the formation of the I7th (S.) Battalion
S.-M. Dobbie was appointed President of the
Sergeants' Mess, a position he still holds, and in
such he is a recognised authority on Omar
Khayyam.
He holds the Good Conduct Medal, and being
an exemplary disciplinarian hjmself, he expects
and demands that all ranks under his care shall
also conform to the high standard of conduct
for which the British Armv is world-famous.
Our S.-M. knows every man in his Company
by name, and his eagle eye sees everything.
He has the confidence of commissioned and
non-commissioned officers and men, and we
know that A Company have a good friend in
Sergeant-Major Dobbie and he has good friends
in us.
Our Sergeant. Majors.
B COMPANY'S energetic Sergeant-Major, by
his kindly manner and the fatherly interest
which he has always shownin those submitted to
his tender care, has earned their filial affection.
" Pa" is recognised by all and sundry as a real,
good sort, and his fame as an excellent drill
instructor is not confined to the I7th H.L.L
Sergeant-Major M'Luskey enlisted in the
Scottish Riftes in I886, and latterly was
attached to the staff of the famous 1St Lanark
Rifle Volunteers. now known as the 5th (T.)
Scottish Rifles. He holds the Hythe School of
Musketry and the Army Gymnastic Certificates.
On the outbreak of war in South Africa our
S.-M. was recalled to his old regiment and went
through that campaign, receiving the South
African Medal with four clasps, including those
of Cape Colony and Orange Free State. He is
also the proud possessor of the Good Conduct
Medal.
On returning home, he was re-appointed tu
the staff of the Ist Lanark, and remained with
them till six months after their transference to
the Territorial Force. His tact and courtesy
gained him the respect of the officers and men,
which qualities are still in evidence in our
Battalion.
The Sergeant-.t\l[ajor's early anxiety to make
us smart and soldierly was responsible for the
following verse which we sing on the march. to
the tune of a well-known hymn :­
\,{hen we hear M'Luskey shouting,
" Do that movement ten times faster,"
All our efforts to oblige him,
End in chaos and disaster.
However, his efforts to make easy the
" straight and narrow way" of Army discipline
to those who had hitherto been accustomed to
the broad paths of commercial life, have been
highly appreciated and accordingl~ met with
success, as the present efficiency of Ius Company
will prove.
Sergeant-Major M'Luskey's previous experience
amounts to twenty-two years of service,
eighteen of which were 'spent as an Instructor,
and B Company considers itself exceptionally
lucky in securing his services.
t t t
In the davs of old a warrior could,
With his strong right arm and a chunk of wood,
Effectively quiet a fractious brood ;
Ta·ra·ra.
Nowadays there's a bit of a change:
We blot out the foe at a ten mile range;
That sounds like a yarn, it's true, though it's strange,
Ta·ra·ra again.

THE OUTPOST,
33
THEBES in Egypt. is known in the Old Testament
as NO. If LordKitchener wants us to go to Egypt,
whether or no. it will be YES.
.. .. .. .. ..
Are we going to Egypt?
Sphinx so.
• * * * •
\Ve have heen led to
Some brilliant chemist in No. Platoon dubbed
an N.C.O. Corporal Nitrogen. The non· corn. has
just discovered that that is a .. gas" remarkable for
its inertness. If we take N to mean Nitrogen, we
must also admit that CO (Carbon Monoxide) is
poisonous and very inflammable. That's your
N.C.O. for you!
* * • * *
Budding King's Prizemen complain that the
stopping of our weekly visit to the miniature range
is seriously interfering with their chances at the next
Bisley meeting.
* * * * *
The battalion order referring to the required
wearing of face·fungus has had a wide influence.
111e cheese in our billet has grown whiskers.
* .' * * *
Some of the chestnuts now in circulation amongst
the battalion caused quite a ripple of merriment in
the select court circles of Herod or the Hyksos
dynasty. They should get a decent burial. Blue.
bells by request.
.. .. .. .. ..
\Vith reference to the rumour that we are forming
a Camel Corps, is it true that the pipe band is
practising " The Camels are Coming? "
* * * * *
During a discussion on the. weight of the kit with
a full water-bottle it was proved to the entire
satisfaction of the thirsty ones that beer is of a
lower specific gravity than water. Drink beer and
assist the Government!
* * * * *
Who said that the Saturday inspection of 1500
boots was a " great feet? "
,. ,. .. ..
Some of the manuscripts we receive show that
" funetic" spelling has made several proselytes.
However, we don't mind giving" prose lights" and
" verse lights" a place in the. sun.
.. ,. ..
'"
\Vhen we asked a facetious private for a few
sketches he needn't have sent ;us The Daily
M£rror and Tlte Police ..Budget. LWe draw the
line at that.
A certain N.C.O. said the Brigadier General.. is a
decent "spud." Is that because he is all eyes?
Ach ay!
.. .. .. .. ..
What billet is smoking Egyptian ciragettes and
eating Turkish Delight so as to become acclimatized
to the land of the Pharaohs i
,. .. .. .. ..
Rumour says we might be sent to the Mediter·
ranean, near the Italian border. That would be
NICE.
.. .. .. .. ..
Is being made an N.C.O. another form of corporal
punishment?
* * * * *
Men's evil manners live in brass; their virtues we
write in water, but we drink their spirits, especially
if they be Kilmamock.
.. .. .. .. ..
Virtue is its own reward.
a day.
Patriotism gets a bob
* * * * *
\Ve may be the apples of the Colonel's eye, but
we're not still life.
.. .. .. .. ..
In Heraldry, a griffin erect on its hind legs ready
to fly is called" segreant," not sergeant.
.. .. .. .. ..
It is suggested that the Sergeants' Mess should be
presented with the Order of the Golden Fleece.
* * * * *
Some of the Germans need an iron tonic more than
an iron cross.
.. .. .. .. ..
A Fifer in the ranks was offended hy the battalion
musician when the latter said that Larghetto was
somewhat slow. but not so slow as Largo.
* * * * *
Chamber of Commerce in German is " Handels.
kammer." In Troon they didn't scheme to give us
a Handel. but they presented us with a pipe and
bugle band and the dr.r-r.ums.
.. .. .. ..
That the Editor is to be commended for the
fatherly letters he sends to his contributors.
.. ..
That the author of that pathetic ballad: "When
we are far away," has been discovered and will be
shot at dawn.
* * * * *
That there is not a decent place in Troon to take
our friends for tea. etc.. now that the South Beach
Lounge is " out of bounds."
.. .. .. .. ..
Is it true a paper chase will be run some Wednes·
day afternoon having a trail laid with caramel
papers gathered in Church on Sunday mornings?
.. .. .. .. ..
Can a Sergeant really feel sanctimonious?
* * * * *
The ants go worrying about their cares,
And think the business of the world is theirs.
The waxen combs seem palaces to bees,
And mites imagine that the world's a cheese.

34 THE OUTPOST.
\
EDITORI~L . ....,.
Why did we Join the H.L.l..
Why did we join the Army,
Why did we come to Troon at all ;
Because we're jolly-well barmy!
THIS is ': question that we of the 17th
Battahon often ask ourselves, usuallv
more in joke than in earnest. It is seldom use~I
as a complaint, even when we are out in a heavv
snowstorm, or digging trenches in wet antI
stony ground when all good folks are in bed.
At times, however, we feel constrained to ask
in all seriousness if it was not in a fit of foolish
enthusiasm that we gave in our names at the
Merchants' House, and later were examined,
attested, and passed into the ranks of the 3rd
Glasgow. These heart-searchings are usually
occasioned by seeing or hearing of the many
who have not yet enlisted, and who have
evidently no intention of taking an active part
in the Great War.
One funny thing that has struck us about
these people, is the ready manner in which they
hasten to give all their excuses to any man iit
uniform, even when the soldier makes no
reference to their non-conformity: they seem
to feel that the uniform is a rebuke in itself.
NO\~, we have always deprecated anything
sllmlar to a white feather crusade on these
individuals, for we feel that it is a case of everv
man for himself: it is for each man to settle
which way his course shall lie and no one has
any right to attempt to interfere. But what
we do object to, from the people who ate not in
the army, is the attitude that they are" not
such bally fools as to join." In other words,
our old chorus. the truth of which none of us
believed. is being thrust down our throats :~­
" Because we're jolly-well barmy! ..
There is, first of all, the case of the young
fellow who sees some recruits at drill, and is put
off, either by their uniform. or by the drudgery
of squad drill. He says :-" If they hadn't
these ill-fitting blue jackets and that convict
appearance . . . If your caps had coloured
dice round the edge . '. ." Pah! We do
r:.ot say we look well in the garb, but we FEEL
welt We didn't think of the uniform ~hen we
joined; our minds were occupied with greater
issues. Again :-" I cannot be bothered with
all) the amount of drilling they give you
chaps. If I could get straight out to the front
Yes, we thought that too at first, but
our sojourn in the Army has taught us many
things. among others. the truth of the old
maxim: "Nihil sine labore."
Another case-is that of the man whose firm is
doing Government work. We have not the
same quarrel with him, for his products are
necessary to our success. But how many of
those men took the O.H.M.S. badge with a sigh
of relief and hastened to shield themselves
behind it! We, too, are O.H.M.S., but WE
had to swear allegiance to his Majesty, and if
we turn traitor we are liable to be shot. Some
people " are not such fools," and prefer to take
advantage of the country's needs to strike for
more pay. What does it matter to them that
their honour is being maintained and paid for
by the blood of men in France getting seven
shillings a week, and that their homes are being
guarded and their positions held secure by men
on sea and land whose reward is an office boy's
salary. "\Ve aren't getting our share," they
say. \Vhat share are the poor fellows in the
trenches getting, who suffer hardships innumerable,
whose meals are irregular and often frugal,
but who " Greet the unseen with a cheer"?
What share has the look-out man on a torpedoboat
destroyer in the North Sea, standing in
glistening oilskins on a slippery deck awash
with water, buffeted by wind and spray, the
cold numbing his hands and feet, and alf!1ost
even his senses, and on whose alertness our
safety depends? What share have the soldiers
at certain war stations, sleeping on concrete
floors, in draughty mills or barns, or splashing
over acres of mud daily for King and Country's
sake? The answer is, " Seven Bob I "
However, they have the satisfaction that they
are Playing the Game, which the strikers, however
good their reasons, can never hope to have.
\Vhatever it was that made them join, it
certainly was not that they were" jolly-well
barmy...•

.----_._---_.__••.. _._---­
THE OlJTPOST.
35
THE MODERN LAOCOON.

36 THE OUTPOST.
The Gem o/Our Letter Bag.
DEAR EDITOR,
I feel I must jolly-well congratulate
vou on your beastly, awfully ripping paper, but
that is not what makes me honour you with
this letter. The fact is, I am overflowing with
indignation. The trouble started this way~
I was in the Pater's office in St. Vincent Place
-swing doors, private rooms, and all that sort
of thing. He, the bounder that he is, had been
interfering with me a bit too much, you know,
telling me I should have to be less generous with
my week-ends, declaring that Thursday night
till Tuesday morning was not going to do; and
all this before an old blighter of a Head Clerk,
even although he has LL.B. and all that sort
of rot after his name; the blighter-he's a
darned nuisance with his: "I promise faithfully
not to touch strong drink-" and:" I am
not ashamed-." Ignorance! and he's over
fifty, too, and has a family! Shame 1
\Vell, one morning as I was having a coffee
with Reggie-you know, he won the hurdles in
1912-when he, Reggie of course, produced a
letter he had received from a pal who had
joined the Chamber of Commerce Battalion.
He showed me it, and when I read that: "We
are having the time of our lives here," and
" there is a jolly fine canteen here" and" we
were down at Ayr last Saturday and struck a
great pair-" I thought to myself: "I'll pay
out the gov'nor! I'll leave his bally office and
enlist." I went and told the old man of my
intentions, and instead of gushing over me with
entreaties to stay, he took my hand-the
stupid old beggar-saying: .. Bertie, you are
worthy of me after all. ] oin, and do your part
for your country. And God bless you l" I
said" Not so much of the' God blessing,' Dad,
I am only going down to Troon !" The old
stumour, talking as if I were blooming-well
going to be fighting, real fighting~like the
rugby scrum at school-only with guns and yon
beastly rotten jaggy things, you know, bayonets,
I think you call 'em. Well, now came the
trouble. I joined and was sent down here to
Troon. I arrlved safely and was promptly
billeted, and h'ere was my first disappointment.
\Vould you believe it, I was put to share a
bedroom with another chap, decent enough, I
suppose; Glasgow Academy, or something of
that sort-but still I had only once before
shared a baBy bed. The food, too, was awfully
disheartening. Why, I havn't seen an oyster,
a quail, or even a saucy old turbot on the table
since I came down; and, as for a glass of lager?
well, let me just leave it at this~that only
yesterday I brought in a bottle of Bass and left
it lying after I had finished. When I came in
for tea, I was greeted with: .. Mr. Montmorency,
I am sorry, but I have never allowed
my husband even to talk about a bottle in my
house, so if you are going to drink in it you'll
have to look elsewhere." But it's not only the
bed and food-why, since I came down, I
havn't had a decent holiday, only a day now
and again. Not long ago, I DID go away for a
few days, and when I came back can you guess
what happened ?-why, they had the blighted
nerve to tell me I shouldn't have gone, and also
that I would be confined to the Guard Room
for seven days. Oh, those seven days! I
can't sav whether it is because there is no
fiat racing or not, but it was: "I'll try four! "
"Try abundance, you lucky devill" or
"It's a nap you had, Iky l" the whole
day and night. If Dad had only seen me then,
for you know, I did take a hand, devil that I
am, and lost: went nap with Queen, seven, six!
What drill we do get! They get us over to
that blest Polo Ground, and no sooner have they
formed us in" fours" than they form us" two
deep:" They give us " quick march" and no
sooner are the words out of their mouths than
they give us "Halt!" Stupids! You
daren't smoke a bally fag, or wet your lips with
blooming water, but some rotter of a chap,
who likely doesn't know the difference between
a White Horse and a Red Label, comes
up, and, well, stops you. If he has three
stripes he says: "You had better drop that or
there'll be trouble if anybody sees you." If he
has one stripe he says: "What's your name?
I'll see you brought before the officer." They
do have queer notions down here.
I'll have to close now, but before I do, let me
tell you this: About a week ago, we were given
a halt, and, as I happened to be close to an
officer-only a Lieutenant, but with enough
swank for a Second-Lieutenant who has been
in the ranks--I approached him and took him
by the arm, you know, and asked him: "What
the devil do you think's on to-day, Sonny? "
He turned round to me, and, after giving me a
look such as made me take my bearings to see
if I were still above ground, took me before a
Captain ] ohnny, and I got two hours extra
drill; why, I don't know yet!
But, now, don't you jolly-well think I have
something to be blessed-well indignant about?
Me coming down here for a bit of sport! Well!
Well I ! Would to Heaven there were signs of
peace in the papers to-night 1 That bad man
of a Kaiser 1 He's a~a rotter, he is 1
Yours" until the khaki comes,"
R. ST. CLAIR DE MONTMORENCY.
(LORETTO).

THE
OUTPOST.
37
Witb
ldens\ve
WITH pensive eye and thoughtful mien
She walks the bleak March garden llmmgh,
;\nd every morning she is seen
\Vith new-cut flowers of cheerful hne.
They may be tender hot-house blooms,
Or spartan blossoms of the spring,
She sends to cheer the wounded;;' rooms,
To ea.se the pain that battles bring.
With pensive eye a.nd thoughtful mien
Each day she sends her dear bouquet:
Her mind's eye had prophetic been,
For one she loved had pas;;ed away.
1\0 more o'er those wide pll.ths he'll iread
At morning clear and evening dim;
So flowers she sends to those ahe{l .
\Vho fought an,l almost died with him.
W. H.
t t t
Counter/oiled.
APPARENTLY the Battalion. was working
smoothlY,and anvmereClVlllan would have
thought that -there w;ts no hitch. Bllt in the
mind of Private \.vyre, whom weeklv readel'S
know _better as Blinker, there was it feeling of
i, - llneasmess, not to say suspicion. He had
joined the Battalion at the outbreak of hostilities,
and had enlisted under an assumed name
I not merelv for it professional whim, hut becaus~
a certain secrecy becomes habitual after working
for about 150 weeks under Golden Flake, the
world-famous detective. Blinker was n bright
youth, and had endeared himself to all bv his
skilful assistance in the captnre of two 'I11C~
who were wickedly smoking cigarettes on the
Polo-ground during a fall-out.
For some weeks Private \Vyre had subconsciously
felt that someone was going lip to
Glasgow on Saturdays \\'ithout a pass. One
evening after a long route march, Blinker was
sitting in his billet on an uptnrne(l arnw boot,
n;editatively smoking a fragrant Japanese
Crourdouh, when sllCldenlv he decided to confide
in his old chief, Coldell Flake. Nipping the
weed, he put it behind his ear and rushed out
to the South Beach l-Iotel. Once there
skilfully avoiding the IOllnge, he won througl~
to the telephone, where a well-spent eight-pence
Jl1lt the matter before (;olden Flake.
The great detective, his slJspicions at once
:uolIsed, immediately slipped on the disguise
or an old soldier, whicll had stood him in such
a good stead in many past adventures, and,
tossing a sovereign to his landlady, shoving a
tooth brush Into his pocket, and bundling a
sheaf of false faces into his holel-all, sallied forth.
Not wishing to create suspicion by pnrchasing
a tIcket, he avoided the station, and, from the
parapet of a bridge, dropped on to a passing
tmin'-~which took him to the North of Scotland.
Three weeks later he was in Troon.
At the station he was met by Blinker, who
was lookiug rather tired after his long vigil, and
who did not recognise Flake lllltil the great
detective gave the scarcely noticeable countersign
of arms stretching' in four directions.
Thereafter all went well. C;olden Flake.
having assumed the name of F. Bodyman, was
enlisted as a member of the Battalion ami
struck on to the strength accordingly. He was,
on llls own suggestion, put on light duties at the
nrill Hall, where lIe might watch all squads
come and go, ami thus be sure of coming in
contact with the criminal who hael baffled ~ the
H. P. and the Proyost-Sergeant for fOllr Ion 0­
months. Flake was not long in discoverin~
that the suspect was none other than George
1\Iarsden Stumour, who, as his attestation
papers showed, had meanly enlisted under the
name of Black, giving his (;ccupation as that of
it lighthouse-keeper. This rather tended to Pl.t­
Flake on his mettle, as he had many an old
score to 'I' il'c off against 11is ohl arch-enemy.
grim smile illllmined hIS keen, set fea tures'as he
carned a secoHI hucket of ashe" 011t of the
Drill Hid!.
* * * *
Tt was now the middle of February, ever\,
Saturcla\' for five weeks had Flake watched the
station in the hope of catching the suspected
man recl-handed. While thus occupied he was
greeted by none other than his old rival Sergeant
M'Clukos, formerly of Scotland Yard, who had
his own suspicions of Black.
Every Saturday hall StuJ1lonr, alias Black,
eluded the hawk-eye of F18ke by a different
ruse, and every Saturday had Flake become
more determined to bring hi 111 to hook. The
great detective usually adopted a demeanour of
incredible simplicity, and managed to amuse
himself, during tIle h011rs he was debarred from
A

38 THE OUTPOST.
the man-hunt, by letting the guard and others
make a fool of him. He would draw a dull veil
over his usually bright bird-like eyes, and even
Blinker thought that his old master HAD
become simple. At the station on Saturdays,
however, the old battle-light might be seen
flashing intermittently from his orbs.
It was now the sixth Saturday of the chase,
and Flake decided that he was not to be tricked
again. As he paced up and down the platform
he ran over in his mind the schemes by which he
had been foiled. They had undoubtedly been
very clever, and two of them were in his mind's
eye- at the moment. Once Stumour, completely
covering himself with cotton wool, and
making a noise like an escape of steam, had
travelled citywards on the boiler of the engine.
On the other occasion, with perhaps even
greater subtlety, he had not gone at all.
The station was crowded wi th jolly soldiers
all full of good spirits, and looking forward to it
large meal at home and a romp with the little
ones. In the mind of Flake, however, there
were no such thoughts. He scanned the faces
of all on the platform, the veil completely lifted
from his eyes. Sergeant M'Clukos was at his
heels, Hnd more thHn once put him on a false
track. He meant well, however, and Flake
kept his temper.
There was now a general movement as the
Clasgow train steamed into the station, and so
far there was no sign of Stumour. Flake's ears
began to twitch, as they always did when he
was excited, and he pulled hard at his rank
green Indian cheroot. \Vas he to be baulked
once more? Flake was now almost frantic
with excitement. He ran up and down the
platform, baying like the sleuth-hound that he
was, and on several occasions knocked over the
well-meaning, but simple M'Clukos, who was
following a false scent in the opposite direction.
Flake did not notice him, however, so intent was
he on his task.
Just then a whistle gounded, the train began
to move, and Flake, looking up from a footprint,
of which he was taking an impression
in wax, saw the guard leap nimbly on to the
train. It was StumoHr !
After recovering from his "hock, Flake got to
work at once. He deduced from the way the
p"el1do-guard j ul1lpecl on to the train, ami'from
the fact that he was wearing his balata shoes,
that he w01l1d return to Troon by the IO.25.
The deduction proved simple.
After having carefully examined the station,
Flake repaired to the Picture House, where he
regaled himself with a 3d. seat. So enthralled
was he by the Adventures of Ka.thlyn that
it was only a chance glance at his jewel-encrusted
wrist watch, a gift from the King of Camaria on
the occasion of his saving the crown jewels, that
he realised that the time for action had come.
Thinking nothing of his wasted 3d. he quitted
the building, a scheme already perfected in his
brain. Making a trumpet of his hands, he
imitated the call of a bullock, a trick he had
learned in India, and, as pre-arranged, was
immediately joined by Sergeant :vl'Clukog and
four armed stalwarts.
" ~ow, my good sergeant," said Flake, with
whom politeness was second nature, "you
must do as I tell you. Post two men {)n the
western side of the station to prevent Stumonr
escaping thence, you and I will go on the
eastern side with the other two."
The instructions were calTied out to the
letter, and all seemed safe. The only thing
that worried Flake was the fear that the
sergeant's imagination might carry him away.
At last the approaching train was heard, and
as soon as it stopped, M'Clukos rushed at the
guard, but was hauled off just in time to
prevent a nasty blow. Flake now scanned the
throng. Stumom- was not to be seen.
" It is impossible that he could have come
by any other train," muttered Flake. .. My
reasoning is perfect! "
Just then he gripped ;VI' Clukos by the arm
till his neck twitched. A man was seen
descending in a suspicious manner from the
roof of one of the carriages. He was smoking
nonchalantly, and with evident satisfaction, a
white pipe of fashionable shape, which he helt!
in his mouth.
" That's he ! " said Flake. always minclfnl of
his grammar.
" \Vbo ?" said MTlukos.
" That tall mall with the pin-leg and the golf
clubs! "
" That party?" ejaculated M'Clukos.
.. Not with them sticks! "
Stumouf, however, for he it was, detached
his pin-leg in three movements, and on the fourth
beat smote the astonished sergeant on the shin'l.
Evidentlv alive to the fact that further subterfuge
was 'Out of the question, the miscreant made
off at a run, closely pursued by Flake and the
now infuriated sergeant. After a long cha,('
the quarry was run to earth in the guard-room,
where Stumour was seen to plunge his right
hand into his left hand trouser pocket, whence
he produced a pass correct in every detail.
" Foiled!" muttered Flake.
" And counterfoiled !" added M'Clukos,
BENTTNCK.

1-­
THE OUTPOST. 3!)
A")it1B~"lfK •
On Rearing Children.
ON a recent route march we passed through it
little mining village whose chief feature
seemed to be its children. All around there were
children, children in arms, children tOddling,
children running about, children of all school
ages, and children looking after other children,
Considering we hear so much now-a-days about
declining birth rates, I fancied I'd be doing an
inestimable service if J could find out the secret
of the village's Sllccess, and with that in view I
sought out the very oldest inhabitant in the
hope that he would help me on my quest. It
is, perhaps, questionable whether he furnished
me with any real information, but I certainly
found his remarks interesting.
" Aye," he said, "we have a wheen weans
runnin' aboot here, an' ye want to ken hoo we
dae it ? "
"That's just it," said I, "do you think
climatic conditions seriously affect things? "
" Naw ! Ye ~an rear weans ony place ill
the wad if ye hae fresh air, watter, an' money-­
ve need monev ! "
. "Then do you have to take any special care
in the matter of the parents; this so-called
selection, for instance? "
.. Aye: Ye maun select yer parents verra
carefully! Ye see, often an' often it happe1ls
that whit ve micht ca' a reallv first class female
'H throw hersel' awa' on som~ fourth rate male,
or the ither way aboot, an' if you want good
stock ye daurna aloo that, altho', min' ye,
some no' bad specimens come oat 0' mongrel
types. Then it's more c1eeficult to rear rale
gUid stock because 0' whit ye micht term the
variability in its development; that mak's it
ye sometimes dinna ken just whaur ye arc, an'
as ye gang on, insteed 0' gettin' better ye seem
tae get waur. Hooever, it's the mic guid
stock that peys, it's aye in demand, an' that's
'whey A say ye maun select yer parents wi'
care. "
" \'\Tell, if you'd use selection in the case of tile
parents, would you carry that on where the
children are concerned? "
" Wid A whit? ,"Vid A no ? Ye 1l\allll

-tu
THE UUTPUST.
Kitchener's Boys.
FRUM Scotia's lonely moulltain glens,
From England's verdant vales,
From woods and bogs of Erin's Isle,
From gallant little \Vales,
Each patriot heard the bugle blast,
Which called him to the fray,
,\ud they who loved the dear Homeiawi
Could do naught but obey,
The roused and startled reaper left
His sickle and his sheaf,
To drive the grinding limber o'er
Blood.sodden plains 0 f grief.
The stalwart shepherd dropped his crook
To grasp the gleaming sword,
The sportsman left the purple lUoors
To face the Teutol1 horde.
The joiner from his workshop came,
The collier from the mine,
i\nd clerks and blacksmiths followed OH,
To swell the martial line.
The preacher from the pulpit stepped,
The weaver from the loom,
,\'11 eager to repel the foes
\\'ho sought to sound our doom.
They're the Belgiums!
Naw! they're nQ'. Ma faither says they'rI'
the Black Watch!
1~ sending comforts to our line regiment at the
front the necessity of supplying something of
which thev are most in need, cannot be too
strongly urged, and perhaps when it is understood
that milk does not form a part of the Army
rations, and that this is otherwise adequately
unobtainable except by the goodwill of friends
at home, it will be readily realised that milk is a
great need all the time'. There is a way of
helping which will not tax the resources of any
individual, for if the men of the Battalion
contribute just Id. each, cases of Kestle's
Condensed :VIilk can be forwarded free of
packing or carriage charges, direct to the
regiment; enough milk to supply every
individual of one whole Battalion with supplies
for three davs for use with his tea. This is
possible by ';irtue of an arrangement by Nestle's
with the War Office Authorities. By giving this
help you create a precedent for similar help by
your friends when your turn comes to go to the
front. The 1v1agazine Committee would suggest
that each Company in our Battalion should
arrange to send the corresponding Company of
our first line Battalio1l at least one supply of
Nestle's .Milk.
.\.n

THE OUTPOST.
41
Modern Artillery.
FIVE centuries ago explosive artillery W

42 THE OUTPOST.
famous 75 mm., or 3 inch field piece, which
has no rival in the world for accuracy and
timing and rapidity of fire, but, none the less,
Wilhelm's Generals by and by are going to
receive a shock when the British approach the
German fortresses.
Our naval type of military gun has done
excellent service in France and Flanders, and
the well-known 4.7 inch had the enemy on the
peak several times, and saw him counted out.
This gun throws a 45 lb. shell over an effective
range of I2,000 yards, and in its action much
resembles the shell of the" 75" when it bursts.
\Ve now have our " Jack Johnsons" and
other colloquially famous types of mincing
maciunes, and the Gerooys are getting a bit of
their own nonsense returned, plus :t' to the nth.
We may have been caught at ,t slight disvantage
at the outbreak of hostilities as
regards large calibre guns, but that has been
remedied, and" with the flower>; that bloom in
the spring tra-Ia," wc intend to hand over
some of the" line" to Fritz, free, gratis and for
nothing.
W. H.
t t *
The Great Adventure.
WHEN he turned out to Sports Parade,
. At half-past two on \Veduesday,
HIS socks were of a l)Ulple shade,
With arrows pointing up the way.
Hi;; semmit was of purest white,
Embroider'd at the neck with blue:
His pants were so absurdly tight
Oue wonder'd how his legs got through.
A nd as the rain-drops trielded down
liis gently-heaving bl'east,
The heavy sigh, the angry frown.
Were only half express 'd.
Unwittingly he took his place
Among the pack that led the way,
Beside the swiftest of the race,
Lined up in semi-nude array.
And, shivering on the sandy shore,
He wore a re.assuring smile,
Anticipating nothing more,
Than" steady double" fo:' a mile.
Then presently he sped away,
Fast as an arrow from the bow­
.\ little later in the day
I passed him in the " very slow."
And as the rain-drops trickled down
liis wildly-heaving breast.
Cunvinced he could nut earnycnown
He stopped and walked the rest. '
J. L. H.
Major W. J. Paul.
THE Second in Command of the 17th (Service)
Battalion Highland Light Infantry has
always impressed uswith his desire for efficiency.
He has been with us since the formation of the
Battalion, and his keenness has been manifest
all along; at first, in his attitude towards A
Company, who were initially under his
command; later, when he supervised the
discipline of the Battalion as Acting Adjutant;
and now, in his capacity of senior Major aHI
Second in Command. But he has not madl!
efficiency his shibboleth to the exclusion of
cverything else, for his innate good nature
ever asserted itself, and his demands for
perfection are always tempered by allowances
for the shortcomings of human nature.
His military career did not commencc with
service ill the -Chamber of Commerce Battalion
for he has long had a great interest in matte~
military. In 1892 he held a lieutenancy in the
4th V01 unteer Battalion Scottish Rifles, now
the 8th (1'.) S.R., and two years later he was
promoted Captain, and took over the command
of E Company in that corps. As O.c. E
Company, he was very popular with his men.
Hi!; kindly way of exacting smartness and
obedience, and the great intere!:lt he took in
. drill and shooting, soon gave him one of the
finest companies in the BattalioR, not only in
the matter of efficiency, but also as regards
numbers, for he knew how to keep the men he
had, and others were attracted by a desire to
serve in a crack company. ­
In 1

THE OUTPOST. 43
Major W. J. P A U L.

44 THE OUTPOST.
Signalling and Signallers.
BEACON fires were the methocls user! for
signalling triumphs and alarums in the old
days. The watchman in the Argos tower stood
" vVatching for the torch, the appointed flame
that wings a voice from Troy, telling of
captme," and in the days of the Spanish
Armada the flres on Skidda\v ronsed the
burghers of (:.c1.rlisle, as Macalllay notices in his
poem on the event.
The ancient Greeks also used a kind of
heliograph instrument in the shape of a highly
lXllisiled steel shield, but what kind of code they
llsed is unknown-it wasn't Morse. In
~elson's time the semaphore system was in
vogue, there being a chain of fourteen stations
between Portsmonth and vVhitehall, eight
doing service to the Plymouth line. London,
Yarmouth and Deal were likewise held in
communication: the distance between the
stations in all cases was ahout eight miles.
In France, Claude Chapp::: invented a
semaphore system in J796, ami it is affirme(1
that it was from onr present ally that Lord
George Murray introduced that mode of
signalling into this country.
That famous old Scout, Captain John Smith,
devised a signalling system whereby lighted
torches, set at different positions, stood for
words, and from that period, about three
hl1ndred years ago, we have made great strides
in the perfecting of the art of quick and efficient
signalling-l\forse ami Semaphore in some
shape or form.
~owadays the signaller must be as hard as
c1,st-iron, and his constitution mw,t be
impervious to the snell blast of BoreHs, the
insidious east winds, the bite of the cranrench
cold, and the nip of the air when the thermometer
is indicating some degrees of frost a foot
or two below zero. Of course, before he gets
to the flag-wagging stage he must swot up the
alphabet of Semaphore and the dashed dashand-dot
of Morse. \Vhen he is proflcient in
that, he spends hours in the inclement weather,
perhaps on the Ballast Bank in the whistle of a
ripping sou'-wester, wherein his flag persists in
assuming twenty fankles per seconci, ane! in
which the answering signalling station, somewhere
arouml the Marine Hotel, is suffering
from the same complaint, and he is expected
to receive messages at the rate of ten words per
minute with the aid of a pair of binoculars that
can scarcely be felt bY,benumbed fingers,
However, the company signallers have made
fine progress and they are rapidly approaching
that proficiency for which the Sergeant has set
the Army Standard. At 9.I5 a.m. in sun or
rain, the squad of enthusiasts are rilarched off
to the training ground-Dundonald Heights or
the golf courses, and there go through the
ilag-wagging exercises, like butchers trying to
tleg the ubiquitol1s blue-bottles off their meat.
Signalling plays a very important part in any
battalion's work when in the field, Signallers
might be called the battalion nerves through
which instructions and queries are transmitted
from the brain to the instruments of performance,
and such nerves must be beyond the
suspicion of flaccidity and out-of-sortness on
every occasion.
Vvhen our training i, completed we shall be
able to send and receive messages in Morse 'll1d
Semaphore, and also be able to erect field
telephones, la\' field cables, read maps, and do
despatch riding. The present war hac,
emphasised the fact that "flagging" is too
dangerous it method of communicating
information, as the enemy can see the signalling
ftags too easily and thus blot a comfortable
station off the earth with an accurate shot or
two. Instead of flags we now use discs painted
white on one side and black on the other, but
the anns are llsed up to a distance of four
hundred yards.
There are humorous sides to all hard training
and the feu d'esprit is always appreciated in
easy moments when we get the P.P.C.S., which
means :-" You may have pmctically five
minutes for a smoke." Unfortunatelv this
important signal only comes once in a forenoon.
vVhen one aspiring learner asked an oracular
"".CO, the question: " Is there any special sign
fOf a hyphen "the non-com. replied, sucking
his lower lip mightily, " Ay! but YOU don't
know it! "
The standard of efficiency is ten words a
minute in Semaphore, and eight wonls a minute
in Morse; of COUfse, SHch \vords as " tintinnabulation"
and "embarrassingly" are not
supposed to be given during the examination.
Finally. will all signallers, professional and
otherwise, please note that semaphore signalling
is onlv of use as physical drill unless all anf!:les
are correctly made and flags not allowed to smiJlf{
hack
H. :vI.
Swear words and impolite referenccs arc not used
hy privates in this Battalion. A memher of E
Company varied nicely the "terminological inexactitude"
idea by suggesting to the other chap
that he "nsed the truth with parsimonio1ls
frugality."
* * *
A recruit, while in the Post Office, true to llis
training, marked time six paces while saluting n
Lieutenant. Tu quoque.

THE OUTPOST.
45
SIR Lancelot was a Knight who went a.questing,
For tough adventures in King Arthur's day;
He cut up braggarts who required besting,
And laid out rotters in a Knightly way.
He looked precisely like an automatic
Machine wherefrom comes chocolate or match,
And through his visor, cool and autocratic,
For sudden trouble kept a constant watch.
In dismal forests, like a couniry smithy
He clanked along, with half a ton of steel
Fastened upon his body, stout and pithy,
The armour jingling like a minster peel.
He sang fine rhymes and Anglo-Saxon ditties,
He minced up dragons and slew wiCked squires,
Went courting casually in antique cities,
And prayed repentant under sacred spires.
He saved fair ladies from bad men's embraces,
His sword aye ready to protect the right;
Called dirty rascals villains to their faces,
And dared the devil on the darkest night.
He'd fight for hours until the perspiration
Wetted his feet and drowned his recreant foe;
He never felt the slightest cons tern a tion
Even when ambushed by a score or so.
He was the bhoy; his moHo: Carpe diem!
His casus belli, what he didn't like;
He slaughtered blackguards when he couldn't
dree 'em,
And punctured blighters with his lethal spike ....
Elaine adored him, like a silly lady,
To die for her, his Knightly oath implied,
And tltis is where Sir: Lancelot looks shady,­
He wouldn't do it, so site went and died.
W.H.
Our Landlady.
SHE is the best of landladies. We retire to our
feather beds at night free from all fear of
sleeping in. Her dread of " that man, Kelly"
is something frightful to behold, and, we are
sure, is the cause of her waking several times
during the silent watches. At 6.30 a.m. we
hear a tap on our bedroom door, followed by a
voice: "Are you up, you twa?" \Ve twa,
returning from utter oblivion, never answer
truthfully, but try to convey by a grunt that
we have been awake for some considerable time.
We rise shortly to a repast whicb the good lady
deems necessary for the maintenance of our
strength during the performance of those
exhausting contortions known as Swedish,
to say nothing of the superhuman effort
required for the accomplishment of a lengthy
" double."
At breakfast we are reprimanded for being
" last roun' the Crescent this morning." This
is received with becoming humility, and we are
left to do battle with-ah, well, some poor
chaps say that they get bread and water. \Ve
twa don't.
" Sandwiches to-day, Mrs. L--," is duly
reported. "You and your sandwiches!" is
the reply, in tones of deep disgust. "The
Colonel ought to ken better than to keep
growing lads out a' day on sandwiches."
" But we must get used to that sort of thingfor
the front, you know, Mrs. L--."
"You boys'will never go to the front. You
couldna' kill a fiea, far less a German," is the
reply.
\Ve can't swagger in front of our landlady.
\Ve can't even instil common sense into her on
this point. It certainly is annoying. However,
we depart with enough grub to keep ourselves
and the bread and water men going. Vve find
that our equipment is certainly of some use, as
we can now stow our sandwiches away
comfortably.
\Ve hear a rumour from our landlady once
every week. The latest extra special :-On the
23rd of April we are to proceed to St. Helena
to erect a prison for the Kaiser. Thence we go
to Tierra del Fuego to perform a similar office
for the Crown Prince. This is from the best of
sources, and besides, she has spotted the places
aforesaid on the map. She has always refused
"on good authority" to believe the Egypt
yarn.
~ \Ve know some nice Troon girl'>, too. We do.
Somewhere in Troon, some time ago, the billet
lights burned after 10.30 p.m.-till I I p.m.
Every five minutes from ID.30 p.m. till I I p.m.
our landlady sallied forth to keep a look-out for
. Fate in the shape of the H.,P. or some dread
person armed with authority. "Ve were
entertaining those girls.
One cold night we went to bed, and to our
horror found there-a hot water bottle! In
the piping times of peace this was all right, but
now---. That hot water bottle cooled
under the bed. Next day we persuaded our
landlady, gently but firmly, that this was not
to occur again. She didn't understand. It
still remains our one point of difference.
Take it from us, though, there isn't another
lady in Troon like our landlady. 'to W. A.

46 THE OUTPOST.
A Week in the Life of a
Company Orderly Corporal.
'fHE w?rries of a Company Orderly Sergeant
havmg been gone mto very thoroughly, it
follows as a natural sequence that we should
have this article, so that he who aspires to wear
the double stripe may know exactlv what
awaits him when fortunate enough to b"e called
upon to serve as Company Orderly Corporal.
As far as can be gathered, the difference
between a C.O.S. and a CO.C. lies in this, that
the Sergeant must attend all the parades,
whereas the Corporal attends very few parades,
l~ any, extra duties being easily arranged as
Clrcumstances and personal calls may (iJctate.
Going out at 7 o'clock in the morning he takes
his stand behind the Company to take the name,
age, and religion, of those who do not want to go
the route march or attend the manceuvres, which
may constitute the programme for the day. He
then confers with his Sergeant as to numbers,
and havmg corrected the various additions on
the parade state, and deleted the N.C.O.s from
the" horse" column, he doubles round to his
billet "ten times quicker than on ordinary
occasions," dons his puttees, puts on hts
belt without glancing at it (there is no
necessity to clean the belt during the whole
week), and makes a bee-line for the Orderlv
Room. There it is usual to find one or tw~
men who have slept in for the 7 o'clock run, and
who have accordingly, between 7 and 9,
developed symptoms of a sprained ankle. The
procedure in such cases is as follows :-add the
names to the sick report, alter the parade state,
afterwards find that the C.O.S. knew about both
cases, and take what you get. \Vhen getting it
you will doubtless be" able to judge whether or
not your friend is yet fit for promotion to the
office of Quarter-Master-Sergeant.
Being a man of exceptional mental ability
(rei. The Outpost, February issue, page 7) th'e
Orderly Corporal doesn't require any assistance
as to his next move. He immediatelv hastens
round to the laundry and devotes the remainder
of the forenoon to arranging walks, visits to
the movies, etc., and promises to come back in
the afternoon and see about the parcels. This
is the procedure on Monday, Tuesday and
\Vednesday forenoons. On Thursday, the term
of office drawing to a close, he looks in at the
Guard Room to see about letters, while on
Friday he " springs" to the Pavilion or the
Unionist Rooms to await the return of the
Company in order to get--no, not his pay, but
just as much as the Qr.-M.-S. cares to call out.
Perhaps it would not be out of place to say here
that there is no truth in the rumour that the
N.C.O.s of a certain company propose sending
a deputation to the Colonel regarding the
arrears. [That is a very delicate touch.--Ed.J
The subject of our discourse "must be a
fighter" in order to hold his own in the Drill
Hall at 6. o'clock while waiting for the orders.
Two copIes of these he takes along to the
Company Commander at Mar Lodge, and not
havmg read the orders on the road thither­
Oh I-he takes a turn round to the Club to
learn what's on for the next day.
The C.O.C. must be at the beck and call of all
and sundry in his own Company. Should he
appear on parade he will doubtless be asked by
hIS Platoon Commander if he is quite fit again.
At least a dozen of the bhoys will tell him that
the laundry hasn't called for the last three
weeks. The correct reply to this is that the
vanman was at the billet three times that very
forenoon, and the landlady said there was
~othing ready. Odd half hours may be spent
In the halrdresser's or at the machine in the
Italian's, although in the latter case it is well
to keep one eye on the Orderly Room window,
to see that the billiard table for which he has
spoken isn't engaged by someone else in his
absence.
In conclusion, and to assist my colleagues
who haven't yet had their turn of this job, I
should explain that a slight digression from the
routine laid down would not be considered an
offence worthy of punishment, but would, on
the contrary, rather commend a fellow to his
Senior N.C.O.g and Officers, thus paving the
way to that coveted commission for which
many apply, but few are chosen.
A.W.H.
\Ve wonder what the Major thought during night
manceuvres recently when he had taken cover from
view behind a bush, and a bright lad called out:
"Ha ~ ha! Spotted YOIl, Sexton Blake ! "
INOCULATION.

THE OUTPOST.
47

48 'IHE OUTPOST,
for Lieut. Laird, but the state of the ground had a
good deal to do with this. The team against us was
pretty hot stuff, but we managed to display our
superiority and keep our record still unbroken.
The 6th are anxious for a return game and we
understand it is to take place at an early date.
Now that the Sports Committee has been formed,
and things are proceeding on
Association organised lines, .. Soccer" is receiv.
Football. ing more attention than formetly.
A Platoon league has helped greatly
to keep Association in the foreground, and the
Committee deserve commendation for the intro.
duction of organised matches, thus putting the game
on a sound,basis, I t is fine to see in Orders a big
list of the results of each day's play, which shows
that" Soccer" in the Battalion is very much alive.
There have been no matches with outside teams for
some time, and we are beginning to wonder what a
Battalion side could do against sOme first.class team.
This game, from occupying premier place in
Battalion sports, has now dropped
Rugby Football. considerably, This can be traced
. to many causes, the most important
bemg want of ground. The authorities complain
that the turf of the Polo ground, when sodden,
suffers severely if played upon, and we must admit
hav!ng seen many a good pitch ruined by play
durmg bad weather. The depreciation of Rugby
stock can ,also be traced to the attractions offered
by the other sports, for we now have far more
to choose from than we had in the early days when
it was football or nothing.--mostly nothing. The
chIef factor. however, has been the rain. which
rendered the ground too soft to play on. The Sports
Committee are endeavouring to find another pitch,
and we trust their efforts will meet with success.
Our last big game was at Anniesland, on Saturday,
13th February, when the Battalion team was
opposed by a team from the 6th cr.) Battalion
H.L.l. We held a practice game on the \Vednesday
before the match, and the following team was chosen
to represent our Battalion :-Pte. A. E. Warren
(E. Coy.), Pte. A. D. Montgomery (E Coy.), Lieut.
Laird (C Coy.), Pte. J. W. Fraser (B Coy.) and
Pte. T. Gudgeon (A Coy.), Sergt. Reith (B Coy.)
and Pte. K. S. Miller (B Coy.). Lieut. A. J. Begg
(B Coy.), Lieut. A. K. Maxwell (E Coy.). Pte.
D. H. Kennedy (C Coy.), Pte E. Dobson (B Coy.).
Pte. R. H. Pattison (B Coy.), Pte. J. W.
Binnie (B Coy.), Pte. J. A. :MacDougall (B Coy.)
and Pte. A. A. Cruickshanks (B Coy.)
The field was extremely muddy and the game
consequently fairly slow. The ball, greasy and
slippy, was difficult to handle. Our fOI'\\'ards played
a great game and to them and Lieut. Laird must be
given the credit of the victory for us by 8 points
(I goal, I ~ry). to, nil. Montgomery made a very
good show m hIs first appearance for the Battalion.
Our halves did not get the ball away so often or so
freely as they might. Fraser was much too slow
To quote C Company, we are still congratulating
ourselves. You must admit that
Tennis. " Harold " was right when he said
last month's Tennis note was
damsmart. \Ve have not made up our minds yet
whether we should congratulate ourselves on being
first with the news that Tennis was to form part of
our sports, or on the fact that it was our little note
that suggested Tennis to the minds of the powers
that be, and softened the hearts of the Troon Tennis
Club. In any case, the Committee of the Club has
kindly granted the use of the courts to the members
'of the Battalion until the beginning of the regular
season. Whichever way you look at it, we have
reason to congratulate ourselves. The Sports
Committee have arranged the matter very well,
allocating the courts to different Companies each
evening and on \Vednesday and Saturday after.
noons. A start has been made and it now remains
for the players to send blessings and cigarettes to
The Outpost" for wonders he hath done."
This idea of getting teams of ten men to run half
The Relay a mile eac!l competitively, is a very
Races good one mdeed. Lately, platoons
. were allowed to choose any ten men
to represent them in the Relay race, but now that
the teams are to be of a certain composition, the
N.C.O.'s who formerly lazed away the afternoon
trot~ing round about with a cross-country pack, or
loafmg about on a football or hockey field, or
wandering over one of the golf courses, will have to
go in for the more strenuous work required in the
Relay race. On the first day of these races C
Company was to the fore, No. 12 Platoon winning
with No. I I Platoon second. Since then, however:
B Company has taken premier place, the results
being :-24th February, 1st, No. 6 Platoon; 2nd,
No. 5 Platoon. 3rd l\farch, 1st, ~o_ 6 Platoon;
2nd. ~o. 7 Platoon.

THE OUTPOST.
49
It must be a fine sight for the onlookers 011 a
Wednesday afternoon to see us
Cross· Country assembling on parade in garbs of
Running. the most varied description ami
almost every combination of colours
imaginable. The parade ground just before the
"FaH in" reminds one of the market place in
Gibraltar, the wharf at Kurachee, or the beach at
Coney Island. After the roll call those who are
going to play themselves fall out, but we remain in
the ranks, for we have work before us. As we swing
off, like a of tartan ribbons being pulled in
some towards Loans, others to
across the golf course to
Monkton, we feel full of joi-de-vivre and begin to
wonder what makes those in front go so slow.
However, this is not an article on the joys of the
cross-country runner, but merely a short paragraph
which I will complete by saying that those who
prefer the drudgery of a game, where you move
about in one place and get nowhere, to a good crosscountry
run, must have a squint in their mental
vision.
After a most promising start. I;Iockey has
unfortunately come to a standstill
Hockey. meantime, owing to weather and
ground troubles. The latter has
been ruled unplayable, but possibly a start will be
made early in March.
Captain Russell, who has done so much for sports,
in arranging ground, etc., has put himself to a great
deal of trouble in this. \Ve cannot speak too
highly of him and we wish him every success in his
activities on our behalf.
On the IOth of February B Company was beaten
by E Company to the tune of 4 goals to 2. It is
evident that E can play hockey, but as for B, well
they have a great reputation for" Rugger" and
" Soccer."
A Company versus C Company on \Vednesday,
17th February, resulted in an easy victory for A
Company by 4 goals to I goal, and but for unsteadiness
in the circle A Company should easily have
added to their total. Play was fast but of a very
indifferent order. For A Company, \Valker, Leask
and Keast were best, "Walker being especially
prominent in the second half. For C Company
O'Kell spoiled good work by fouling. LieuL
MacBrayne was fair, but was not supported.
A Battalion team was picked to oppose a Glasgow
team on the 27th February, but in view of the heavy
rains the match was cancelled, as the Polo ground
would have suffered too much by the game.
The par. in last month's .Magazine seems to have
borne fruit, for small organized Golf
(jolf. Competitions between Companies,
limited to certain numbers, have
been sanctioned. It is to be hoped that this will
develop into Battalion Competitions at an early
date. On the 17th February, a team from A Company
played a team from C Company, and the
result was a win for A Company by 9 games to :\.
Another game was played on the 3rd March, when a
team of officers and men from B Company beat a
similar team from A Company by a very narrow
margin.
Application was macle to the Committee of the
Municipal Golf Club to consider the question of
reducing the presen t charge for play over the
Municipal Courses to members of the Battalion,
with the result that we may play any day except
Satnrdays and Sundays at 3d. per round in place
of the ordinary charge of 6d. Well done, Sporb
Committee!
Boxing has occupied a prominent place in army
sports, deservedly, we think, for
Boxing. many years. The resource and
speed of thought it incluces, and the
rapidity of action it necessitates. has long been
recognised by the vVar Office as invaluable in the
training of the soldier. Its neglect in this Battalion
has been due probably to lack of gymnastic accom·
modation, but now that the days have lengthened
boxing can be indulged in out of doors, and we hope
to see a start made soon .
A class could easily be formed to take instruction
from the capable men that we have, and if the
weather will not permit of practice outside, the
Pavilion and the Unionist Rall are available, while
there is a sufficient number of boxing gloves in the
Battalion to keep us going meantime.
To THE SPORTS EDITOR, "THE OUTPOST,"
SIR,
B Company of the 16th
Battalion H.L.I. will be glad to meet
Company in the Brigade in a friendly match
Football (Soccer).
to
Ko. 7 Pldtoon will be pleased
any other platoon in the Brigade.
I am, etc.,
R. M'C. DALY, C. S.-M.
B Company,
16th (Service) Battalion H.L.I.
GAILES, 13/3/15'
In Portland lI.F. Soldiers' Club a Draughts and
Chess Tournament has just been
The Soldiers' completed. The competition,
Club.
to members of the 15th Royal
and 17th R.L.I.. was very popular,
ami after several keenly contested games the following
were the prize winners :­
DRAUGHTS.
Private Love, R.L.L
Private M'Intosh, RS.
Private Freeland, R.L.l.
Private Chaddam, RS.
CHESS.
Private Blyth, R.L.L
Private Brown, RS.
On Saturday, 27th February, Colonel Morton,
with his usual kindness, visited the Club. and during
the course of the concert, which is held every
Saturday night. presented the prizes to the winners,
and thanked the managers of the Club for the work
which was being done.
The visit of the Colonel was highly appreciated
by the and the men. who were present in
large and before leaving he was accorded
a hearty vote of thanks for his kindness in visiting
the Club and the interest which he took in everything
that tended towards the comfort of the men.

THE OUTPOST.
THIS is a sorrowful sort of a song.
A sorrowful sort of a song;
A nymph of the flood called Cly(ie,
Three syllables in that name there bc,
Fell in love wi th Apollo. and he.
As you may infer.
Had no time for her.
This is a sorrowful sort of a song.
A sorrowful sort of a song;
Apollo turned her amorous head.
At last the deities found her dead;
The Gods soon settled her case, and said:
" She shall rise from the tomb
As a sunflower bloom! "
i{eally. this is a sorrowful song.
A sorrowful sort of a song;
Her head still turns. as the wise attest,
East at the dawn, at night towards the west;
Apollo. the SUll. still does his best,
As the ancients said,
To twist oft her head.
ESQUIRE.
t t t
Letter from the Front.
THE Army has suffered an awful rout
In the terrible battle of--(name left out),
But the enemy's hordes have been defeated
On the banks of the river~--~~(name deleted),
The Austrians under General Dank
Attacked the Russians at-~~-~-(name left blmtk).
On the (blank) road they fled in fear,
But they turned and fought at--(blue pencil here).
In Asia. I hear, three thousand Japs
Have taken some Forts (consult tlte maps).
Our men have had buL little rest
Since the fighting began at--~(name suppressed).
But a funny thing happened, we had to laugh,
'.Vhen ~--(word gone) we --(missing paragraph).
'Ve.laughed and laughed, it was lots of fun,
In spite of the awful---(sentence go"ne).
If the Censor destroys this letter. well
I wish the Censor would go to --- (the rest of the
page has been torn off by the Censor).
C.W. L.
Reflections ofa Sick Parader.
I AM roused from an uneasy slumber by yawns.
and a vigorous upheaval of bed-clothes.
followed by a neck-and-neck race for the bathroom.
Dawn is breaking. The rain patters
quickly on the window pane. and through the
narrow slot50f the blind I discern grey clouds
hurrying across the sky. With a little shiver of
satisfaction I turn on my side and go to sleep,
\Vhen I wake again there is a fire burning
brightly in the grate, and presently I am
balancing on my knees a tray laden with good
things. Suddenly I hear, far off, the note of
the bagpipe, and then the tramp, tramp of
many feet as the Battalion starts off on a route
march.
My mind wanders from the tray; the eggs
seem less toothsome, the rolls insipid. Then, as
the sound of the pipes melts away in the distance,
a deathlike stillness broods over all, and,
forgetful of breakfast, I stare across the sea,
speculating idly on where the Battalion is going.
if the platoon is singing the same old songs. if
the section still upholds its reputation for
grumbling. and when I shall be well and able to
grumble with the best of them. As 1 lie
watching the shadows on the water I dream of
mv old civilian life-how remote it seems t­
aIi'd fall to wondering if an existence so tame
would ever "satisfy me again. So, with an
occasional meal and a visit from the Doctor,
who tells me to stay in bed, the day passes.
Towards evening an unwonted bustle in the
kitchen and a tremendous clatter of plates,
together with a savoury smell that creeps
insidiously upstairs, proclaim the return of the
Battalion, and in a few minutes the house h,
invaded by a hungry mob who wolfishly
consume everything they see and ask me
between mouthfuls why I'm not eating.
With growing jealousy I listen to tactless
discussions as to how they mean to spend the
evening, and the girls they are going to meet.
At length, I retire bedwards. hate smouldering
in my heart, and lie dozing and tossing fitfully
and listening to the hurrying of feet now bent
on pleasure, but when. some hours later, they
follow me to bed, 1 pretend to be fast asleep,
though in reality I am drinking in the aroma
of strange tales and stranger waters.
Healthy, happy savages, they fall asleep
almost before their heads touch the pillow.
But they do envy me, these mornings!
BEE.
* * * * *
A tobacconist near Prestwick Cross intimates
that some swagger canes, which had been lost during
night manceuvres on the Links, have been handed
in to await claimants.
be more lynx.eyed.
Some of the bhoys should

THE OUTPOST.
51 '
A charge could be made for so many shots,
and the target would be handed to the marksman
as his property after he had fired hIS
rounds. If this plan be possible, many of us
could keep a constant watch over our progress
in the art of aiming and firing.
I am, etc.,
C. W. L.
SIR,
I wish to thank the Editorial Staff of
The Outpost, but somehow when I try to put my
words together I feel I am not equal to what is
required. When I first mooted the idea I was
ridiculed, but from my long experience of
men and their manners, I was certain the
material was in the Battalion which could run a
Magazine recounting the doings of its members,
relieving their minds from the everlasting
"Squad," "Platoon" and" Company Drill,"
and at the same time also give their young
minds a literary b,ent.
How far my foresight was correct The
Outpost has shown, and I am not saying too
much when I make the statement that it takes
a good first place among military and civilian
magazines of a like nature. To the staff and
the contributors, then, my thanks are due for
having turned out such an excellent paper.
That it will prosper goes without saying, for all
are triers and all vieing with each other how
much thev can do to further its interests,
working harmoniously with that spirit which
has been in the Battalion since its inception.
May good luck attend all your efforts, and
the work you are now doing. lVfay it be a help
to all of you on your return to civil life and a
Bright and Happy Remem brance of the time
when " The Dav " came and found you fit to
take your place ~vith your fellow-man for King
and Country.
Thank YOII all.
R. S.-M. KELLv.
SlR,
Might I make a suggestion, through
the medium of The Outpost, to the effect that the
miniature range at the Drill Hall be opened at
night, or on certaih evenings in the week, to
members of ~he Battalion who desire to improve
their shooting in their leisure time,
Sm,
On several occasions it has been
suggested that a Dramatic Club might be formed
amongst the Battalion.. Many men arr;ong. us
have practised the hlstnomc art, and, judgmg
from the talent displayed in the first number
of The Outpost, we should have sufficient brains
to get out original sketches for ourselves. We
certainly have men who can act, and who
require vety little tuition in the sCle;tce of
gesturing and articulatIOn. I rather thmk we
could produce good actors, and if not q~ite
Quintus Roscius', yet excellent enough to give
us all a splendid night's entertair:ment, whether
we be in billets, under canvas, or m a cattle shed
just clear of the firing line.
Al! our other social and athletic projects have
been successful, why not this?
I am, etc.,
6:2 B.C.
SlR,
I have been reading The Outpost with
much pleasure. It is a delight to me to see,
marching along our streets, such a number. of
splendid young men. I enclose a Marchmg L!lt.
Paddy has "Tipperary," which is n~ doubt
excellent for him, but surely there mIght be
something for Donald and Sandy. This lilt is
not perhaps ideally perfect, but it smacks of our
dear auld Scotland. I send you a couple of
verses as a trial.
TVLLOCHGORVM'S MY DELIGHT.
Tune-THE \VHlTE COCKADE.
o my! and 0 my! It's a far awa' cry
To the hills 0' bonnie Tullochgorum ;
\ViIlie ettled to get there, but he landed in a snare,
And he eouldna' fin d the road to Tullochgorum.
So it's Ha! ha! ha! he may cackle, he may era\\',
And pose as the w,or~d's cockielorum; . ,
At the hinder-end 0 a he WIll get a neht

52 THE OUTPOST.
A COMPANY.
WE commenced our week of special training on
Monday, nnd February, and after a fore.
noon's work, consisting of judging distances,
advancing under artillery fire, moving forward in
open order, and ending up with rushes into the
firing line, we marched back to the Drill Hall and
were served with service equipment-~valise,
haversack, ammunition pouches, entrenching tool,
and water bottle, etc. On Tuesday we paraded on
the shore, looking something like members of the
.. contemptible little army," and, with om bundles
on our Shoulders, marched off along the shore, via
Barassie towards Dundonald, in a villainous fall of
wet, blinding sleet; and ultimately reached our
field of operations, whereon our chef de batamon
elucidated his requirements to the N.C.O.s and
others.
The Brigadier gave us the benefit of his opinion,
and after the attack we again showed our skill in
judging and misjudging distances. Wednesday
saw us on the Troon Golf Course among the dunes,
and we shifted a phantom army from its covering
position and "point d'appui " with temerity and
despatch. Dundonald Hill saw us indulging in
cunning advances on a dastard foe during Thursday
forenoon, and on Thursday night we held the roads
in the same vicinity against the enemy. vVe were
dismissed at 9.30 p.m., and we stuck the lOt hours
work well. Friday was the limit. Jupiter Pluvius
turned on the H20, and the blast drove the rain
right through us, Manmuvres, as far as being
instructional, were no good in such a Noah's flood,
and, drookit to the skin, with boots like reserve
water bottles, we returned to Troon. vVe met in
the Unionist Rooms in the afternoon to cheer the
prize winners of the shooting competition, and,
incidentally, were paid our seven shillings
honorarium. On Saturdav we cleaned our rifles
at the Drill Hall, told stories, and awaited the
week·end passes, and were served out with r new
puttees. The following are the crack shots of A
Company, and also their scores and prizes. The
possible marks were 50. The first lot are the trained
shots, range equivalent to 500 yards; the second
lot the untrained shots, range equivalent 300 yards.
Lance.Sergt. Drummond, 46 points, prize ir 0 0
Private Gannaway, 37 0 6 J
Private W. Graham, 37 0 7 6
r " R. B. Craig, 36 0 5 IQ
Mailer, 34 0 .5 0
C. Long, 32 0 2 6
Drew,­ 3I 0 2 6
Many of the crack shots of the Company, whose
modesty prevented their entering the competition,
have sworn to compete next time and thus capture
the entire prize money from the Battalion. OPERlE
PRETIUM EST. In last number our pets were
referred to. One has gone to the happy hunting.
grounds-the Pomeranian-unfortunately killed
by a kick from the horse of one of the officers. One
of the fox terriers, Mick, cut its foot on barbed wire
during the Company's trek in the wet on Friday,
and the senior sub.editor applied the ligature, and
carried the beastie home, two miles away. The
starboard forward pedal extremity bled some, and,
although palmists may not believe it, the amateur
vet. got his hands' red' by that canine during the
walk back. vVe regret that Lieutenant Becket, of
~o. I Platoon, and Lieutenant Gardner, of No. 3
Platoon, have been ambushed by an army corps of
hostile influenza bacilli, and were absent from our
special training course. Lieutenant Paterson, of
No. 4 Platoon, got over his attack in time to
accompany us on the 2znd ult. Private Carmichael,
from No. 4 Platoon, has deserted us to take up a
commission, and a host of new N.C.O.s are now
sporting those unattached stripes mentioned last
month. Sergeant Carnan, of No. 3 Platoon, has
returned from near Cambridge, where for some time
he has been training the Lovat Scouts in the art of
war. He let them into the secret of bayonet
fighting, trenching, skirmishing and shooting, and
when their big drum lacked a drum-stick manipl1"
lator he also showed how that was done. A
versatile lot, is A Company•. In addition to our
other activities we support the Magazine well.
Aspiring Iitterateurs or artists should hand their
work to Pte. \'17. Hutcheson. No. 3 Platoon, or Pte.
Chapman, of No. 4­
B COMPANY.
t t t
SCARCELY a breath of wind. a cloudless sky of
azure blue, Arran peaks covered with snow
glistening in glorious sunshine. On such a morning
we sallied forth to commence our first week of
special training. It felt good to be alive, and the
shadow of coming ordeals':'vanished in the joyous
atmosphere. The second, day of our week was
perhaps the most interesting, when the Brigade
Captain, the Hon. Captain Drummond, was
present. But it was chilly work in the Old Quarry
notwithstanding the bonfires, and "covering fire"
from the hill tops was anything but a warm job.
Some cold wet weather followed, but at the end of
the week we all came up smiling, fit as the pro·
verbial fiddler, with our sick list practically at
decimal point. It may thus be concluded that hard
work agrees with B Company. If more proof were
wanting it could be furnished by the inhabitants of
Loans. Awakened one night from their beauty
sleep close on the magic hour by the iustie,t singing
ever heard in the neighbourhood, their first thought
was of a party of midnight revellers, but it was only
6 and 7 Platoons emerging from water.logged
trenches, mud from top to toe, getting into their
stride down the Loans Road. B Company appear to
enjoy night entrenching; at least it is a fact that a
number actually begged permission to work
overtime. The week ended, we handed over our
rifles to A Company, who took them over with scarce
a murmur. They mnst have been clean indeed!

THE OtJTPOST.
Equipment at last! After practical demonstration
behind the Drill Hall. in bitter North wind,
tempered by humorous comments from our
irrepressible C.Q.M.S., we have completely mastered
buckle and strap and feel quite like soldiers when
we go a route march in full marching order.
We shape well at the new bayonet fighting under
Sergt.-Instructor Shuttle, and as some remarked:
" They do ring the changes on us. Guess what we
don't know now about bayonet fighting ain't worth
knowin' !"
In the second Miniature Range Competition, C
Company were most successful from the purely
mercenary point of view, but out of the first 5 in
the No. I Section of the Competition, 4 were B
Company, so while second financially, we still lead
the way on merit.
Always versatile in athletics, we have now more
scope for our talents, since our games now include
Hockey, Golf and Tennis, and in a "Company
Athletic Championship" we look to B Company
to lead the field. Hockey seems to be the weak
spot, but a stronger side is certainly available than
that which went down so softly to E Company.
In the recent Rugby victory over 6th H.L.L, the
Regimental Team again contained a large contin.
gent from B Company. The forwards had a hard
tussle, and our win is greatly to their credit. The
ball did not come out from the halves so well as in
the Canadian game and the slippery ground did not
seem to suit Fraser. B Company has lost a .. star"
threequarter in Lieut. Laird, posted to C Company.
We were glad to see B Company come out so well
in the Platoon Relay Races. One day No. 6
Platoon were winners, with the No. 5 Platoon
second. And on another occasion No. 6 Platoon
again came in first. with No. 7 in second place.
Still another member of our Company has joined
the Commissioned ranks in the person of Private
J. L. Stirling (No. 8 Platoon).
Sergt. Cohen hopes he has made it perfectly clear
that pitch and toss is strictly prohibited behind the
scenes at pay time.
Invaluable for transport, aud unequalled in field
manceuvre, .. Huffer" the latest B Company
recruit is a distinct acquisitiOll. But he has given
us one anxious moment when, on a certain beautiful
morning, lie sniffed anxiously round the kneeling
forms of the section and platoon leaders. On such
momentous occasions he really should remain on
guard over the main body.
Those of B ('Almpany who wish to contribute to
the :Magazine and are too shy to approach the
Editor personally, might give their articles, poems,
drawings or photographs to Private Edmond. No. 6
Platoon.
C COMPANY.
SINCE the 17th September, when the Company
held its first parade in the hall of the 5th S.R.,
many changes have taken place among the officers,
Captain Anderson being the only officer who has
been with the Company from the start. When E
Company was raised, Major Auld was transferred
to the new Company. and to fill the vacancy Captain
Morton was transferred from A to take command.
Lieut. Ferguson and Lieut. Sharp took over the
command of their platoons shortly after the
formation of the Company. Lieut. Morton, of
No. 10 Platoon, was posted to B, and his place
has been taken by Lieut. Laird. Lieut. Miller,
who commanded No. II Platoon, since its formation,
with conspicuous ability, and who had thereby
earned the confidence of the men, has been
transferred to the Transport Section of the
Battalion. He is succeeded by Lieut. Morrison,
who has already ingratiated himself to the platoon
by the sympathetic consideration he at all times
evinces. In many of the Battalion events C has
more than held its own. This particularly applies
to the Shooting Competition, when the Company
lifted more of the prize money than any other
Company in the Battalion. In the Experienced
Shots' Competition Sergeant l'vlarshall tied for 7th
place, and Private T. D. Mackenzie for loth place.
The following list speaks for itself :-Inexperienced
ShotS-1St, Pte. A. G. Irvine; 2nd, L..Corpl. 1.
Andrews; 3rd. Pte. S. :\of. Watson; 4th, Pte. P. D.
2'vfenzies; 6th, Pte. 1. G. Spence; 12th, Pte.
A. M. Maitland; I3th, Pte. C. W. Lucas and Pte.
A. B. Graham (tie); 18th, Pte. G. A. M'Lelland and
Corpl. Dickson (tie).
In the various sports C has done remarkably well.
In the first Relav Race, No. 12 Platoon came in
first, No. I1, second, Nos. 9 and 10, sixth and
seventh respectively. On the following \Vednesday,
No. 12 Platoon were fourth, No. Jl sixth, and No. 10
seventh. Nevertheless, it has been said, and
perhaps with some justification. that the best teams
are not representing 'the platoons. When the
results are chronicled as they are, surely it behoves
those in authority to see that the best men are
chosen to run, and not those who would constitute
themselves a " Racing Committee."
Owing to the Company being engaged in Special
Training they did not take part in this race on the
3rd March.
In the Platoon Football League two matches
have been played~-No. 10 Platoon had a somewhat
easy win over No. 14, by 8 goals to nil; No. 9 drew
with No. 13, no goals being scored. Football is
!lOW coming into its own! All the platoons arc
now keenly interested in the game and are quite
enthusiastic regarding their respective chances.
There is only one fear, and that is expressed in the
hope of a subaltern of the Company that the war
would last long enough to allow the Competition to
be completed. The men appreciate very much
the interest taken by the Platoon Commanders in
the teams. The presentation of "togs" to the
players is also much appreciated, and shows that
the very best feelings exist between officers and men
-which is admitted to be a most important
consideration.
In the Hockey match against A, C won by 4 goals
to J. Lieut. Laird and Private D. H. Kennedy
played in the Battalion Rugby teams, and in the
Association game against the Queen's Park the
Company were represented in .the team by Lieut.
Laird, Sergeant Sturton, Privates H. C. Davie,
H. A. Martin and A. D. Thomson. In the Golf
match against A the Company received the" dull
thud," losing by 9 matches to 3.

_THE OUTPOST.
At the Church Parades the organ has almost
always been played by Private Hubbard, who is
also the conductor of the Male Voice Choir, which
leads the singmg (?) during route marches. Fn e
men have been discharged to take commissions in
other battalions. Sergeant Drummond has been
detailed to take charge of the Miniature Range,
and act as Sergt..lnstructor of Musketry, under
Major Auld.
C Company, we may confidently assert, does
everything, including large contributions to The
Outpost. Sergt. Marshall and Pte. Hall are burdened
daily with sheaves of letters to the Editor.
The first week of this month was devoted to
Special Training, but the Company was most
unfortunate in the matter of weather. Some of the
areas allotted to the Company had to be abandoned
owing to the state of the ground, so that a little of
the variety of the training was lost. A very
distinct improvement was noticed towards the end
of the week in the movements of the men, and the
Section Commanders learned much from the various
schemes which were so carefully thought out and
explained by Captain Morton. Although much
harder than usual, the week was enjoyed by all
ranks. It proved to be very instructive and
certainly much more interesting than "forming
line outwards" on the Polo Ground. The only
regret the men had about the special week was that
they were not allowed to take part in the Battalion
Double at 7 o'clock in the morning (?)
On a recent Friday, great excitement was created
among the junior ~ .C.O.s of the Company. After
pay at the Unionist Rooms the men were to be
marched along in groups of ten, or thereabouts,
as they came out after receiving their" salary"
(there was some to get this particular week as there
was nothing deducted for insurance) to the Dr ill
Hall to be furnished with khaki--mits and sleeping
helmets. The honour of leading men along
Portland Street seemed to appeal to the imagination
of what Lord Roberts once called the brains of
the Army. and there was an unprecedented rush
amongst them as to who should have the honours:
No wonder, then, one despairing "One Striper"
was heard to exclaim, in a wronged tone of voice;
"Hey, there-you've got eleven there. Leave
some for me !" This b'ame lad in taking along the
next group encountered a second.lieutenant of the
Royal Scots. Imagine the blushes on the faces of
the men when he gave in a confident, stentorious
voice-" Eyes Right!" "Eyes Front!" One
cruel private was heard to exe!aim; "that truly
they were the people, and wisdom would die with
them."
The fixing up of the new kit created great
diversion-if not anxiety~-among the members of
the Company, as doubtless would be the case with
the other companies also. So it was a proud,
young soldier of the King who, on coming on to
parade on the Saturday morning, and when asked
how he had got on with the equipment declared
with flashing eyes; "I've used all the bits, anyway,
except that darned yellow strap. I can't get it on
anywhere." By the way, is everybody carrying
water in the" bottles?" A remark regarding lime
juice was several times-overheard. Euphemism!
Perish the thought! ­
D COMPANY.
I'fHE representatives of the Company on the
Magazine Committee were glad to see the
first issue so well supported and trust that this will
continue. Sergt. Abercrombie or CorpI. Ellery
will be pleased to receive contributions.
It would be noticed in the first issue how modest
we were in reference to D Company's virtues and
accomplishments. It is unfortunate that some of
the others did not follow our example in this respect,
for we always maintained that self.praise was no
honour. Nevertheless, we have the material, and
when we come to the .. real thing" the "Irish
Brigade" will be there and in the thick of it.
~The news of the formation of a big drum band in
the Battalion is only of passing interest to D
Company since we hear that applications are being
restricted to the supermen from the "modest"
companies. (See last month's Company Comment.)
The 'result of the Miniature Range Competition
does not reflect great credit on our shots. It must
be remembered, however, that on the day allotted to
us at the range we had been at Kilmarnock, and
the men were tired. There was a long delay before
we lay down, with the result that half the entrants
did not fire. Under improved conditions we could
do much better. The following prizes were gained;
Lance.Sergt. Hughes, . prize £0 I 8
Pte. Gowans, " 0 I 0
Applications for commissions have been duly'
made.
A mmour is current that we men of D Company
are doctors, lawyers, chemists, company promoters.
etc. This libel has been circulated to our detriment
by some evil-minded person and opportunity is here
taken to deny it. Careful enquiries made amongst
all ranks prove finally, and beyond all shadow of
doubt, that we are, to a man, soldiers. What were
we, did you say? Ah! that is another maIter,
we are in the army now.
Throughout the route march the Company
philosopher was wrapped in deep thought--so much
so that at the halt be borrowed tobacco, forgetting
he had his own. On being dismissed he lifted up
his voice unto the multitude, saying these words:
.. They are what they are, despite Company Com.
ment; so are we." vVhereat the people marvelled
greatly, saying:" Verily. this, too, is an honest man,"
and each went his way and told his neighbour.
We beg respectfully to offer our congratulations
to Captain Neilson on his promotion. He comes of
a good soldiering family and is "to the manner
born." Captain Neilson's brother is a Brigade
Major and a D.S.O., so we are forced to the con·
c1usion that soldiering is hereditary. like most of our
vices. Captain Neilson should go far, and Major
Hutchison is fortunate in having him as second in
command.
One of the best stories we have heard for a long
time comes from No. 13 Platoon. The doctor wa~
in need of an orderly and one of the boys of 13
applied. "\Vell, my man, what do you know about
horses? .. said the doctor. "I've backed them for
the last ten years, Sir," was the unexpected reply.
Well! Well! Well!
The formation of E Company temporarily
depleted our ranks and bereft many of us of
pleasant marching companions, Some said it was

THE OUTPOST.
55
a pity to leave so good a Company as D. Modesty,
however, forbids, etc. Notable amongst the
transfers were those of Lieuts. Cassels and Kitchen.
These oflicers had earned the respect and confidence
of their commands and the news of their going was
received with regret.
One of the Company's many excellencies which
we did not mention last month, is the total absence
of its men from the defaulters' list. We may get
the hard work but we don't get the hard labour.
In matters unconnected with training the
Company has not distinguished itself, for our stay
in Troon has shown a singular paucity of events
and happenings that testifies to the socially
enervating effects of comfortable billets. In the
realm of sport a few platoon football matches stand
out as our solitary achievement. The advent of the
weekly sports day should prove eflicacious in
counteracting this woeful inertia and it will give
ample opportunity for using up our superfluous
energy I
\Vith the facilities for sport becoming more and
more numerous, it is gratifying to see the Company
taking advantage of them with such zeal. The
weekly programme is studied with interest, and is
responsible in no small measure for the general
desire to keep fit. 15 and 16 Platoons have a couple
of sprightly and well balanced "soccer" teams,
and will take some beating. In this connection we
hear that No. 14 Platoon, having lost count of the
goals scored against them, are arranging a match at
rounders with the local Kindergarten SchooL
E COMPANY.
t t t
BRAVO E! Whatever else may be said of us,
our support of The Outpost is second to none .
On all sides eulogistic remarks were heard regarding
the first issue, and the members of the Company
showed their appreciation of the journalistic effort
in a most tangible manner, so much so, that repeat
orders were the fashion at the far end of the parade
ground. So enthusiastic was the reception given
to the Platoon Sergeants when they appeared on
parade with the first edition, that only the strident
tones of S .. M. Kelly prevented a general rush from
the ranks. The call of duty is, however, very
strong down our way, and the command:
" Battalion! Right dress! " was obeyed with the
usual alacrity. After the rolls had been called,
and "Stand easy" given, those lucky enough to
have copies were bombarded with questions which
were replied to in monosyllabic fashion, what time
the speaker rapidly scanned ~he pages of the Mag.
So much for the first number. Now E, let the
other Companies see what you can do with the
second. Show them that the most encouraging
and appreciative answer to the efforts of the
budding journalists is to overwhelm them with
orders, and make them feel that the recompense is
a fitting one for their labours. Journalists. even
of the amateur brand, are susceptible to a little
flattery, and if all the Companies continue to support
The Outpost as E has done, then there is a prospect
of our Editor suffering from "Inflated Napper."
However, a few hours' company work with the
Brigadier in attendance will soon take down the
"Inflation," as possibly some of C Company's
N.C.O.s will admit. By the way, if you wish to
contribute to the Mag., give your productions to
Sergt. Ferguson or Corpl. Grifflths.
Since the last notes, we have progressed rapidly
in favour, and are now considered such a fine body
of men, that upon occasion we are deputed to lead
I' the Battalion in our route marches to--heaven
knows where. So smart and soldierly is our
I carriage that when passing through Ayr recentlyperhaps,
however, we had better not tell the other
Companies what the onlookers said, it might only
create a feeling of despondency, and it would hardly
be fair to discourage them too much, would it, boys?
\Ve have also experienced the delights (question)
of night work. if lying on damp grass, keeping as
silent as the grave, and trying to imagine that the
notorious Huns are within a c1eek shot, can be
considered work. Is it to be wondered at that a
few of the men were desirous of lighting matches to
see the time, while others were reduced to capture
an inoffensive maiden who was discovered passing
through the outpost lines? The slight diversion
created by these incidents helped to while away an
hour or two. Regarding these manreuvres, we
would like to have an answer to the following
'Vho were the commanders who were captured
because they had forgotten the pass-word? Is it
possible that they are members of A Company, or
did the little bird whisper wrongly?
A question which the Company is especially
interested in is :-Where are the half·mile relay
teams? On a recent \Vednesday afternoon, out of
8 teams competing, four were from E, and one of
these was the recruits. What has become of the
sporting element in the other Companies? In this
particular event No. 19 Platoon always shows up
well, and has finished second on two occasions.
The same platoon is also strong in " soccer" as No.
IS will doubtless admit, Possibly, when the two
teams meet again the lesson which No. 19 then
learned will be turned to advantage.

56 THE OUTPOST.
Sub-Editorial.
The first number of The Outpost has been a
great success, and the Press
The comments on the initial product
Outpost. have been flattering. When it
was decided to print two
thousand copies of No. I, the Committee had an
uneasy feeling that two or three hundred copies
might be left. Happily, the entire edition was
sold out inside three hours, and another five
hundred were put in hand. These were
snapped up inside an afternoon, and an
additional five hundred were also taken up in a
short time. Thus, in all, about three thousand
copies of your own little journal have passed
into appreciative hands, and 'the staff wish to
express their feeling of satisfaction over the
success of the venture. Several letters from
ladies and gentlemen who are interested in the
Battalion have been received at the Editorial
department, and it is hoped that contributors
will do their utmost to maintain or surpass the
merit of the first number. On the suggestion
of Sergeant-Major Kelly, the first copy that
came from the machine was signed by the
editorial staff, the ColOliel, the Second in
Command, the Adjutant and the Sergeant­
Major, and was put up for auction. The
Sergeant-Major made an ideal auctioneer, and
bidding was started at a shilling. In a minute
or two it leaped from shillings to pounds, and
amid great excitement, only two bidders were
left-a private from C Company, who stopped
at £4 75. 6d., and Major Paul, who went up to
£4 10S., and thus secured the treasure. Those
of you who missed the auction, missed a treat.
The proceeds were handed to the Belgian
Relief Fund.
If our contributors have heard some of the
appreciative remarks about their
The efforts which we have listened to,
Contributors. they have been amply repaid for
their labours. Our printers, too,
have had compliments paid them on their work,
and the magazine as a commercial advertising
medium has assumed quite an important
position. The Outpost has been despatched to
all parts of the world, and no matter to what
station the Battalion be sent, it is assured of a
warm welcome, as it has sent, so to speak,
its carte de visite before it. Contributions of all
kinds for the April number should be in our
hands on or before the 22nd March. The
original drawings which have appeared, and
which will appear in future numbers, are for
sale, and those who wish to possess these clever
souvenirs should apply to the Editor at once.
* * * * *
The Magazine Committee tackled the production
of The Outpost with
Magazine nothing in their exchequer except
Fund. their own private means, so, to
assure a bank balance of a
comfqrtable amount, Major Paul has most
generously handed back his famous first copy,
which has been raffled at threepence a ticket.
\Vhoever is fortunate enough to own this
autographed copy will possess a memento of the
Great War which must ultimately be of some
historical value. The Committee herewith
express their deep appreciation of Major Paul's
thoughtful kindness.
MAGAZINE NOTICE.
Contributions in prose and verse are solicited on
all subjeets, and we would appeal to every member
of the Battalion to assist, especially with short
notes for the columns under the various headings.
Everything submitted will receive careful
consideration. Contributors will facilitate the
work of the Editorial staff by attending to the
undernoted suggestions :­
'Write on one side of the paper only.
Write in ink, and legibly.
Use sheets of uniform size. Paper the size of the
Magazine is most suitable.
Leave a good margin on the left hand side for
Editorial corrections and remarks.
Sketches should be in black ink only, on white
stiff paper, and on separate sheets.
Address all eorrespondence relating to Literary
matters to Editor, "Outpost," Dunreggan, Troon.
Advertisements and Finance to be addressed 10
Finance Manager at same address.
The Outpost may be had in Glasgow from
D. Robertson & Co., Ltd., 23 Gordon Street;
J. Smith & Son, Ltd.. I9 Renfield Street; and
Porteous & Co., Royal Exchange Square,

THE OUTPOST;
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- ~Ul.V~CE ~l\lYl\lQe~ tt,L.. i..
-- MA(iAIi~t
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No. 3. APRIL. 1915.
IN view of the fact that a battalion of the
Royal Scots forms part of the Brigade to
which we have the honour to belong, a.
few notes on the history of this famous
regiment may be of interest to readers of our
Magazine; especially as the career of the
Lothian lads stands second to none in length
and interest.
The origin of the Royal Scots lies far back
indeed, being traceable to the 9th centurywhen
certain Scotsmen formed part of the
bodyguard of Charles' of France, From that
time, until its inclusion as part of the regular
British Army, it had a lengthy and creditable
existence on the Continent, serving under
various rulers, notably during the Thirty Years'
\Var under Gustavus of Sweden.
In 1661, the regiment was brought over
permanently to Britain, and, together with the
Horse Guards and the Coldstreams, was enrolled
at the he~d of the Army List of Charles n. as
the 1st Foot. The commander at this time was
George . Douglas, Earl of Dumbarton, whose
term of office is commemorated by the title of
the present regimental march, .. Dumbarton's
Drums," the air having been originally introduced
in 1678, and the close association of the
Douglas family with the regiment was
responSible for the old name, "Douglas's
Ecossais."
Brother Scots.
The "Scots" are the oldest .corps in the
service, and as such have been endowed with the
ancient-sounding title of "Pontius Pilate's
Bodyguard." To describe their many campaigns
would be to fill a volume, suffice it here
to mention that they served under Marlborough
at Blenheim, Oudenarde and Malplaquet, and
with Wellington at Waterloo, had a share in the
American War, and bear on their colours the
~omewhat unusual inscription-PF.Kl~. The
Roval Scots have also seen service in India,
went right through the PeniJi!sular War, and the
Sphinx, superscribed " Egypt," on their Clest,
tells of further honours. It may be our lot to
visit the scenes of our Brother Scots' past
triumphs. In South Africa they covered themselves
with glory, a notable achievement being
the taking of Zwaggenhock when, once more
commanded by a Douglas, under cover of night.
they ascended the slope of what has been 'aptly
described as a " miniature Spion Kop," and at
daybreak triumphantly put the enemy to
flight. .
As in the case of our own regiment, the daily
papers supply abundant proof of more recent
exploits, and it may be confidently expected
that when the time comes our brigade-mates
will show themselves fully worthy of their
regimental record.
A. I{,

58 THE OUTPOST.
The Rifle Squad.
IN the last two issues of the Magazine undue
notice is taken of the exploits of all the
Companies from A to E, but what about the
bhoys who haven't been "gazetted" to any
old company? What about The Rifle
Squad? In our opinion, WE are the "fine
body of men" which is often referred to down
here. Although Sergeant-Major Taylor
informed us we shall soon have a company
attached to us, to show them how to drill, and
otherwise manoeuvre, let it be understood that
we are "some" Squad. In fact, Sergeant
Dobbie said-how does he know?-that we
might even be promoted, should we be lucky
enough to draw the right ticket during the next
raffle for stripes. Did not our respected
Colonel hie into our pastures to cast a loving eye
on our proceedings? He did! What did he
say after we attacked the railway signal-box?
You don't know 1 We did it in grand form,
and we had real rifles, too. This conspiracy of
silence is not fair I We are here, and everybody
has got to know it. "Hackenschmidt," one of
The Rifle Squad, says he overheard the
Colonel remark that he had never seen such
an attack carried out in such a manner before,
and he was sure he'd never, possibly, seeits like
again.
Another thing, we don't all agree about the
efficacy of vaccination and inoculation--we
,yield to our obligations-but; say, can't they
inject something into us to make us bulletproof,
say iron tonic, or steel? It is highly
gratifying to know that our instructor, Sergeant
Halliday, has called us credits to him, even
although he has had to use red-hot sabre-cuts
of Saxon speech taus occasionally: lovable
words- in the Anny must have a nip in them.
Snuff and ginger, what! what I We'll disbancl
with regret, and think all the time that, as
The Rifle Squad, we could have preceded
the battalion into action, swiped the Gennans
into a panicky condition, and, like hefty
pioneers, left a path open for the other
companies to walk along. \Ve>d make ourselves
th.e sacrifice. Anyhow, we'll be leaven among
the battaJion-=" Hackenschmidt," " Napoleon,"
and" Harry Lauder,"-and although as The
Rifle Squad we may cease to exist, unlike
Rosalind, we'll have The Rifle Squad in our
dispositions.
" My word, by Gawd, we're The I{ifle Squad,
A dem fine body of men:
It is no cod when the folk applaud-
They won't see our like again." Amen.
D.M.H.
The Khaki and the Blue.
WE were quite the smartest lot
That Kitchener had got
To see his bit of business carried through;
Indisputably chic
Our appearance was unique
While still we wore our uniforms of blue.
The public quickly grasp'd,
As we went marching past,
Exactly who we were and whence we came;
And the ladies would admire
So distinctive an attire,
And smile approvingly upon the same.
And if on pleasure bent,
No matter where we went,
Our appeal was irresistible, when dress'd :
The clothes were quite enongh
To attract a bit of" fluff,"
And our captivating manner did the rest.
So, till quite a recent date,
We could charm and fascinate
By virtue of our uniform alone;
There was that about the dress
That tended more or less
To elevate the military tone.
Unfortunately. though,
Resistance to the foe
Necessitates less visible attire;
However" nice" the blue
In spectacular review,
It's rather too attractive under fire.
Accordingly, one day
A change in our array
Announced itself emphatically near,
As it lay upon the floor
Of the Quarter-Master's store,
Instilling fragrance to the atmosphere.
The new phenomenon
Was duly fitted on,
But the khaki left US critically cold;
As contrasted with the blue
Its merits were but few,
Its deficiencies were great and manifold.
So, humbly we submit,
Since the khaki doesn't fit.
And slacks and tunics are of diff'rent hue.
That those that are in power
Will improve the shining hour,
And re-instate our uniforms of blue.
J; L. H.
As a result of the Rugby Football Match at
Anniesland, between our Battalion XV. and
the 6th (1'.) Battn. H.L.L XV., the Belgian
Relief Fund has benefited to the extent of
{2I 4s. 6d. .

THE OUTPOST.
IT certainly looked as if it \vere going to be a
particularly vile Sunday. It had snowed
during the night and we had scuttled home
from Church without the customary grand
procession along to the Marine and back to the
parade ground. Not only was the weather
against me, but my worthy bedfellow and
billet-sharer had been fortunate enough to
secure a Week-End Pass, and was now no
doubt at home relating to his folks his manifold
activities in the Army. I was undoubtedly in
for a miserable day; no one with whom to have
a friendly game of bezique; no one to argue
with on the correct manner of forming fours
,with a blank even file, the rear rank being in
front, or some other brain puzzler.
At the end of what seemed the longest forenoon
in mv life, a knock at the door announced
dinner and gave me something to occupy my
mind for the time being. The melancholy
feast over; I became more and more determined
to do something to pass the afternoon. One by
one I enumerated the things which I might do ;
I could go round and play whist or "Old
Maggie '" with 16 Section in their billet; I
could go through to the back window and have
some air-gun practice at the windows of the
houses over on the Esplanade. None of these
quite appealed to my particular frame of mind
at that moment. Suddenly I bethought myself
of my long-lost brother with whom I had joined
the Army in September, and whom I had seen
but thrice since. I would go round for him and
drag him off on a photographic expedition.
As I stamped into his bedroom he gave my
bulging pocket a suspicious look and glanced out
at the snow. "Lovely day," I chirruped.
L .•Cp/. A. G. Dea"••
" Damned!" he answered, still eyeing my coat
pocket.
" Some fine snow scenes to be had up yonder,"
I hazarded, indicating the shadowy outline of
the Dundonald Hills through his window.
" Possibly," he conceded in his usual laconic
fashion. He apparently was not very enthusiastic,
but after some ten minutes lecture on
the beauties of Nature in her Winter garb, he
capitulated, and I promptly hurried my
prisoner off.
For a while I could make nothing of him, but
as I knew nothing pleased him better than to
see me waste a plate on some impossible
SUbject, I thought the time had arrived for me
to 'take' something. We had just passed
under the small railway bridge on the Wallacefield
Golf Course, and I had been holding forth
at some length on the beautiful pictures it was
possible to make with very little in them, when
I pointed out that the two of us trudging along
the snow-covered paths made quite a nice little
picture in itself. To point my argument, I
commanded him to walk past while I
, snapped' him, and he did so, remarking in
his usual way, "Another spoilt plate." The
operation completed, we pushed onward r and
as we neared the hills my companion's
spirits rose from zero with a bound. His
enthusiasm was worked up to fever heat whel)
we reached the woods above the Reservoir and
beheld the beautiful efJects of the snow-topped
trees. "This is some picture," remarked he, at
the same time producing a small vest-pocket
camera, which, unknown to me, he had brought
with him, and before I had recovered from my
astonishment he had snapped a beautiful little
woodland scene. Shortly afterwards I. got

'1
60 THE OUTPOST,
------------------------------------~------------------------------------I
another, almost as good, and soon the pair of us
Were scrambling ankle-deep in snow through
the woods in sCCLrch of more ' pictures.'
really magnificent, the chalky whitencss of the
earth being in strange contrast to the leaden
greync:;s of the sky, so we immorta.lised the
IN DUNDONALD GLEN,
At length we reached the Loch and were
amply rewarded for our exertions by the Alpin e
aspect of that beautiful little lake among the
firs . Taking farewell of UUI' prctty little Loch
we turned our fa es Troon-wards. Thc ' s now
covered land:;cape stretching for miles before
us, vic\\'cd frunt the top of the hill, .was
DUNDONALD LOCH.
view in a semi-genre study and hurried onwards.
This concluded our camera work for thc day, so,
shutting up our instruments, we pocketed them
a nd became once more two respcctable
" F eather-beds" hurrying home for a wellearned
tea.
BEZ1QUE.
T'ROON FROM THE HILL,
L..Cpl. A. G, D.ans,

THE OUTPOST. 61
TALION [:]OTES~·~
THIS issue of The Outpost marks off one more
division of time and brings us, as we hope,
nearer to our goal-fitness for the front. It is
somewhat startling, as each issue appears, to realise
that another month has passed by, so swift seems
the passage of time, and all too short for what we
feel we have to do. Yet, steady progress is being
made, perhaps, as we hope, more than is realised.
The Brigadier has been out with each of the
training compallies, helping them with advice and
criticism on many occasions.
Since our last issue, Captain the Hon. M.
Drummond has been recalled to rejoin his own unit,
and his departure is a cause for regret by all ranks,
since his knowledge of the present conditions of
warfare has proved invaluable to all during field
training. We wish him a speedy recovery of his
health and good luck in his future labours.
As each company completes another week of
special training the" soldier instinct" takes deeper
root, and all ranks acquire the habits of conduct in
the field that make for efficiency. Each day brings
its lesson, sometimes hard to learn, but all the more
valuable when learned, and each day makes us
more and more able to profit by the advice, praise,
or blame, meted out to us.
Bad weather has interfered most unfortunately
on more than one occasion with the training weeks,
and the Brigade Office has been obliged to prohibit
the use of certain training areas owing to the state
of the ground, but as Spring advances such
disappointing interferences should cease.
Now the training companies are undergoing a
week's preliminary field training under their
Company Officers before going on to special
training, and, as is the case when undergoing their
regular course, they are relieved of all duties to
enable them to carry out their schemes.
On I5th March Lieutenant Gardner, Company
Sergeant.Major Dobbie and Sergeant Maxwell
attended a course pf instruction in Musketry at
Strensall.
During the last month our Battalion cooks have
been undergoing courses of cookery to teach them
to make the best use of issued rations, and to fit
them to take up their most important duties. At
first we were accustomed to look on cooks as some·
thing in the nature of a joke, but time has made all
wiser, and we realise at last that the cook is the real
hero of every campaign, for, without him, no army,
however trained or armed, could live even at home
much less in the field of war. It is with a sigh of
relief that we hear reports that our cooks have
learned well.
The transport section and pioneers are now in
course of training, and by the time we go once more
under canvas these sections will be able to make a
camp for us and carry in our necessities.
Service equipment has now been issued to the
four companies undergoing special training, and
that for the remaining company has now arrived.
Each man now goes to his training carrying the
equipment he will wear at the front, and as time
goes on he will carry the weight of ammunition and
kit that necessity demands he should carry into
battle.
As each company comes off special training it
undergoes a course of instruction in bayonetfighting
under Gymnastic Instructor Shuttle, and,
at the same time, is taught to climb obstacles,
knot-tying and lashing, and musketry, etc.
The field service khaki uniform has at last
arrived, and several of the companies have been
fi tted. This in itself brings US one step forward,
for this much.looked·for event should help to point
the lesson that we are being trained for the front
and for war, if such a lesson is necessary. However,
we have heard sighs over the old' blues.'
Towards the end of last month we received the
splendid gift of two fully equipped field kitchens,
which have already proved a boon to companies
engaged in night operations. It is impossible to
over-estimate the value of this gift to the Battalion,
and the patriotism which prompted it, but those
who made. the present may feel sure that each day
on active service one thousand men will be happy
and comfortable by their generosity and foresight,
and each day will add to the value of their gift.
Postal arrangements since our last issue have
undergone a considerable change, and now letters
are distributed by the Orderly Corporals, as we
were accustomed to have them distributed in camp,
after the forenoon parade, and the constant stream
of parcel.recipients from the Guard Room shows
that the Battalion is keeping up its former reputa.
tion of one man one parcel per day.
A most successful Concert was held in the Picture
House in aid of the Belgian Relief Fund and those
who contributed to this success, both by taking
part or making preparatory arrangements, were
rewarded by having a considerable sum of money
to hand over. This is gratifying as their efforts
merited success. The sum realised was £70 os. 6d.

62 THE OUTPOST.
The Trooper's Yarn.
HERE'S the yarn I've got to tell yer­
Fill yer pipe and take a seat,
And I'll tell yer 'ow it 'appened
In that ghastly Mons retreat.
Th' Eleventh Hussars, the Cherry Pickers,
Was my regiment in them days,
Battery L of Field Artil!'ry,
They was with us, and the Bays,
Doin' rear-guard on the sixth day
After biddin' Mons adieu,
Night found us at Neury village,
Precious glad to get there, too.
Frontin' Keury is a gully,
'Alf mile wide, a giant trench:
Batt'ry L unlimbered, our side;
On the other was some French.
'Alf the village lies well sheltered
In a sort of woody cleft,
'Ere, by luck, we 'ad our quarters
On the flank well to the left.
After we 'ad groomed the 'osses ;
Cleaned and fed ourselves as well,
Restin' there, sad thoughts came throngin'
Of my chum in Batt'ry L.
T'aint the thing to stand much tellin',
'Ow a chap feels for 'is pal,
But I was as soft for Bill as
Other fellers for a gal.
We 'ad 'ad a kind of squabble,
Nothin' much, down at the Base;
'Adn't time ter laugh things over
'Fore we left the bloomin' place.
'Adn't never met 'im since then.
Shook 'is 'and or 'erd 'is shout,
'Adn't told 'im I'd forgotten
\Vhat it was we'd groused about.
All that night the rain kept drippin',
'Nough ter give a chap the creeps.
Mankind, as a rule, feels cheerless
Wnen the 'Eaven above 'im weeps.
P'raps that's why I lay and shivered,
Feelin' anything but brave;
Like as if, some folks would put it,
Ghosts 'ad walked across my grave.
Thought I 'eard the dead a-croonin'­
.. You won't see yer pal again! "
In a sad, unearthly rhythm,
With the patter of the rain.
Mornin' came at last, all greyness;
Sun ne'er opened 'alf an eye,
'S if 'e knew, and didn't want ter
See so many brave men die.
I
Through the mist across the gully
Hazy figgers might be seen,
But we didn't take much notice,
That was where the French 'ad been,
Yes, I says, that's where they 'ad been,
'Ow the 'ell was wc; to know
They 'ad gone off in the night.time ?
And before us was the foe.
That's why, after we 'ad saddled,
And was waitin', messin' round;
Washin', shavin', smokin', cnssin',
Or a-lying on the ground,
Galloped up to us the Major,
Cool enough, 'e was a brick,
Shoutin' out: "Take up position,
And for God's sake, lads, be quick! "
" Germans r "-by 'is movin' lips we
Knew that 'e was sayin' more,
But we couldn't 'ear 'im speakin'
In that blastin', 'ellish roar.
Like a thunder, mad for slaughter,
'Owlin' in its lustful ire,
\Vas the crash of bursting shrapnel
\Vhen the Germans opened fire.
Batt'ry L, surprised and shattered,
Served their guns as best they could;
\'1e stood by, and watched 'em fallin',
From the shelter of our wood.
Saw our comrades fightin', dyin',
Never thinkin' how or why;
So when bugle blew: " Get at 'em,"
\Ve 'ad seen 'ow soldiers die.
'Cross the gully charged we, vengeful;
Gave no quarter, asked for none;
Smashed the wheels, and broke the breeches,
Captured every German gun.
Yes, we done our little business,
But what of the lads behind?
Them as stood still to be slaughtered
Done their duty, done it blind!
Out of all the gallant Batt'ry,
But one gun came safely through:
And the men who served 'em gladly,
Dead or dyin', all but two.
I got back, and found Billlyin'
By 'is gun, 'e 'eard my shout,
Tried to answer, but 'e couldn't,
Smiled, and then 'is soul went out.
\Ve was rear-guard, so we left 'em,
Earth to earth, just as they fell,
What they done was just their duty,
We 'ad ours to do as welL
That's the yarn. It's just It story,
'Ow some gunners died, but still
When I gets my call to glory,
God grant I goes out like Bill. T,

THE OUTPOST.
n:.l
COMMANDERS, 117TH
INFANTRY BRIGADE.
Lieut.·Colonel F. J. STE ENSON,
Commanding 15th (Se rvice) Baltalion,
The Hig hland Li"h t Infa n t ry
(1St Glasgow).
Colonel D. L .\lDL AW, V.D.,
Commandi ng I lh (Service) BallaJ ion,
The Highland Light Infa ntry
(2 nd Glasgow).
Rrigadi r·Gellera l F RED . H ACKET TH oMl'soN, C.B.,
'ommanrling 117th Infantry B rigade.
. MORTON, V.D.,
Command ing 17th (Service) Ballalion
T he H ighln.ncl Light Infantry
(3 r(\ Glasgow).
Lieu!'.· olon I .\. G. , U RM STO••
Commanding 15t h (Service) Battalioll,
The Roya.l • cuts
([s t E dinburgll).

64
THE OUTPOST.
Our Sergeant.M ajors.
C COMPANY are proud to have as their
Company Sergeant-Major, John Garrow.
a man who has had much military experience,
and who is ever ready to place his knowledge
at the disposal of the rank and file of the
Company.
In 1886. while the 1St Battalion of the
Highland Light Infantry were stationed in
Belfast, C.-S.-M. Garrow joined that famous
regiment. and early received his baptism of fire
by helping to quell the riots which took place
that year in Belfast. When peace had been
declared he was transferred to the Curragh
Camp where he received his first stripe. After
a short stay at the Camp he was sent out to
India to join the 2nd Battn. H.L.I., the regiment
which carries three Colours on parade. It was
in India that he was promoted to the rank of
Corporal, and in 1892 his abilities won for him
the rank of Sergeant. In 1896 he left India.
During his period of service in India. C.-S.-M.
Garrow saw much fighting, his regiment having
taken part in putting down tribal risings. On
returning to this country he was attached to
E Company of the 1St V.B.H.LI.. where he
held the rank of Colour-Sergeant, and mainly
through his individual efforts that Company
was the best drilled in the battalion. While in
India, he held the post of Gymnastic Instructor
in his regiment, and when he left the Volunteers
in 1904, the Glasgow School Board were quick
to secure his services in a similar capacity.
After giving to the Board ten years' splendid
service, in September of last year he was" dug
out" and posted to C Company of the 17th,
where he is repeating history. C.-S.-M. Garrow
takes an active interest in the affairs of the
Battalion, and of the Sergeants' Mess in
particular, in which he holds the position of
Mess Treasurer.
IN a certain Drill Hall in the early days of last
September were gathered together a
couple of hundred young men chatting, smoking
cigarettes, and displaying generally a listless,
come-and-have-a-coffee air-the hall mark of
the city youth. .' Fall in !" Above the hum
of conversation rose the voice, crisp and clear,
and fraught with that compelling quality
which makes men jump to obey. It was the
voice of D Company S.-M. Dunsmore, and the
brief command, that served as an introduction,
was full of prophetic import. In the months
of training that have elapsed, right nobly.has
our S.-M. striven, by example, encouragement,
and all the wiles and cunning in handling men
that a long record of service can impart, to
enable us to "fall in" as soldiers who are a
credit to themselves and to their battalion.
Behind him, our S.-M. has a record of service
second to none in the battalion. Thirty years
ago-to be correct, in March, 188s-he enlisted
in the 1St Battn. The Argyll and Sutherland
Highlanders, and at home and abroad completed
22! years with the regiment, afterwards
serving on the staff of the 4th Battalion in the
capacity of Musketry Instructor. He retired
from this post a couple of years ago with a
G.C.M. and an enthusiasm for musketry that
his few years of retirement have in no wise
dulled. In fact he confesses it is his hobby, and
the Company may look forward to a good time
when the rifles come along.
You are, indeed, fortunate if you happen to
be present when S.-JVL Dunsmore grows
reminiscent over the Boer War. He was in it
and well in it. He treats one to a recital of
battles, skirmishes, night attacks, bayonet
charges, and forced marches. Place namesnow
forgotten-fall from his lips in bewildering
and unspellable variety. Magersfontein, the
scene of that" regrettable incident" when the
Highland Brigade was so nearly wiped out, has
a place in the retrospect, and the horror of it
is implied rather than spoken. Fortunately all
the bullets in the war were destined for billets
other than our S.-M., and he left South Africa
in May, 1903~having been out there since the
outbreak of the war-unscratched and carrying
a Queen's Medal with 4 clasps and a King's ditto
with 2 clasps. Incidentally he marched 3,000
miles with his Brigade while there--a record.
Finallv-we write the word with reluctanceour
S.-]\"r, has given us of his best, and D
Company hold him in high esteem.
we respond to his" fall in ! "
t t t
The Spirit 0/ the Deep_
Long may
WHEN daylight breaks on the rolling deep,
And the mariner sings his morning song,
My soul descends to its watery keep,
While the good ships glide along.
But when the sun's last rays have shone
Across the isles I love,
I rise from the bed I lie upon,
And heave me up above.
And through the night I deftly steer
The ships along their course,
When the waves roll high 'neath a clouded sky,
And the voice of the wind is hoarse.
.. .. .. ..
And the sailor sees with vacant eye
The phantom shores of Destiny. J. L. H.
,

THE
OUTPOST.
65
NEARL Y four thousand copies of The Outpost for
:\farch have been sold. Some Magazine!
* * * * *
Mosquito nets will probably be served out soon.
* * * * *
" Pyramids" experts should report themselves
for duty in the promised land. A snake·charming
and crocodile·snaring cla;;s may be formed as soon
as the French studies arc more advanced.
* * * * *
That arrangements have been made with the
Egyptian authorities to billet the Battalion in the
Catacombs.
..
* * * *
It is to be hoped that the company cooks will
receive proper instruction in the preparation of ices
and fruit salads if we are really going to such a
warm climate.
* * * * *
Will the girls of Cairo be as plentiful as the girls
of Troon? This point will require investigation
before the Battalion can proceed there.
.. .. .. .. ..
If the rumour is constant, it is Constant.inople.
..
*
..
* *
Two strenuous members of E Company returned
by an early morning workmen's train from week·end
leave, so that they should not miss the" double."
\Vait till they grow a month or two older.
.. .. .. ..
*
Look out for our GRAND SUMMER NU.~BER
early in May. Price Sixpence.
*
.. .. ..
*
As the Battalion must not shave the upper lip,
several sporty members are fetching down their
greyhounds to chase the hairs off. A bit off, Eh ?
* * *
..
*
A certain officer said that some privates are too
prone to lie on their backs, shut their eyes and look
at the sky.
I .. .. .. ..
*
,
It
will be much easier to " Tak' a pint tae march
on," now that the service water bottles have been
served out.
That the men of the Battalion run a greater risk
than ever of being mistaken for soldiers, now that
the khaki has been issued.
.. ..
An ardent golfing N.C.O. before
giving the
order; "One round rapid! Fire!" was heard to
shout" Fore! "
.. .. .. ..
An anxious scout wants to know if a cemetery is
to be reported as " dead" or " deceased" ground.
He has been buried in thought.
.. .. .. ..
*
Is it true that some of the knuts are bringing
down their studs for the Polo season? "Gold.
mounted?" Clarence has asked.
.. .. .. .. ..
\Vhen are we to receive lines for getting our balata
shoes re.soled? They need repairs badly.
.. .. .. .. ..
The latest recruit asked a sergeant at the Armoury
for" a bit 0' gun·cotton to clean my rifle with,"
whereat the N.C.O. exploded, but ~ afterwards
explained that gun.cotton did likewise.
.. .. .. ..
*
Is this the same fellow who asked the medical
orderly for some nitro-glycerine for his sore throat?
.. .. .. .. ..
The first lecture on entomology was much
appreciated. It is to be hoped that it is only the
first of an interesting series.
.. .. .. ..
The rifles at the range must be awfully" bored"
by having such a dull time. No doubt they
sometimes feel inclined to "boIL" They may,
however, " pull through."
.. .. .. ..
*
It is one of the wonders of the Battalion how the
doctor finally cured Private MacPhut of parading
sick.
* *
.. .. ..
What is the consensus of opinion as to the effect
created by a well-known local ecclesiastic when he
appeared with two pairs of trousers on, the outside
pair hitched two inches higher than the unde~. It
certainly showed his individlfality.
*
.. .. .. ..
Was the Major surprised when, on the command,
" Follow me in column ofruit," his company bore a
close resemblance to a bunch of grapes?
*
.. .. .. ..
Certain Troon ladies have been heard extolling
the virtues of Stirling as a billeting area. Strange!
.. .. ..
* *
It is rumoured that a certain commander has
generously given his platoon a number of .. marks ..
in case they should be suddenly sent off to Germany.
.. ..
* * *
What does A Company mean by GUMBA ?

66 THE OUTPOST.
EDITORI~L . ....,.
SPRINGTIME is delightful any-where, but
spring in Sleepy-Hollow surpasses everything.
The baby-pinkness in the eastern sky,
that heralds the new-born day, is received by a
gentle rustle in the woods, as the people of the
wild turn in their sleep, preparatory to emerging
from their comatose state. The magic of the
spring morning is transmitted to the creatures,
and the "tur-tur-coo" of the wood-pigeon
from his perch in the tree tops, is answered by a
squawk from the cock pheasant in the covert,
calling the attention of his chicks to the
delightful feeling of spring in the air, in the
improviqent way that fathers have, rather than
lead them to the food left handy by the
gamekeeper,
Down yonder on the marsh, the gulls mutter,
fiutter and shuffle themselves awake, either to
start at once on the trail of the early wonn, or
to rise away into the blue and volplane down
again in a series of graceful curves. He earns
the admiration and envy of his spouse who is
sitting patiently on the eggs, or waiting, with
the open-mouthed youngsters, for a share of
lumbricus. A shrill piping nearer the shore
indicates that the snipe is already breakfasthunting
and evidently enjoying the pursuit of
the elusive larva. Further inland, a solitary
peewit is, making his morning toilet, standing
inch-deep in a little pool, presumably admiring
himself, like Narcissus. Just overhead is
another, describing meaningless circles, so close
that the sound of his wings can be distinctly
heard, fdr all the world as if they required
oiling. He emits an occasional homely wail
which seems to embody all the peace and
solitude of the bogs and mosses of Scotland,
The year's at the spring,
The day's at the morn,
_0/1 orning's at seven,
The hillside's dew-pearl'd ;
The lark's on the wing,
The snail's on the thorn,
God's in His Heaven,
A It's right with the world.
RORERT BROWNING.
and give a sense of the security of lonesomeness
to the hen on the speckled eggs in her lowly nest.
On the common, a startled hare jumps from
his fonn in the dew-soaked tangle, but, having
found no enemy in sight, he ambles off at an
easy canter, closely followed by his mate, who,
at this signal, "all clear," has risen from her
cosy neuk not a yard away. Along the dykebacks
innumerable rabbits are nibbling away
heartily at the young grass, oblivious of the
mavis' love-song or the lark's shrill ecstasy,
and takingno notice of the day-old lambs, with
their curly white coats and lanky limbs, who
are curious to know what the grey-brown fluffy
balls are, that eat gra.'ls " just like mother."
Springtime in Sleepy-Hollow is eminently
peaceful. The emerald-green of the pastures,
the regular furrows on the ploughed land, the
kirk on the hill, and the tidy appearance of the
newly trimmed heclges, where the green buds
are just bursting through their brown scales,
all indicate a freedom from disturbance and
diffuse a sense of the pennanence of things,
a sense of the uninterrupted procession of the
seasons. It is impossible to look on such
scenes of rural peace and security without
thinking of the fanus of Belgium and the fair
fields of France, mined and spoiled, pillaged
and L:Lid waste. The Garden of Europe is
blasted, trampled, trenched and seared by the
machinery of war. On Easter Sunday in
Sleepy-Hollow it is easy to believe that" God's
in His Heaven." But what of Flanders,
what of Alsace and the 'Woevre? Spring is a
meaningless word to them now. They must be
avenged. Remember Belgium!
This is the message of Spring, 1915.

THE OUTPOST. 67
Father Time:
"HAVE yOU OBSERVED MY GLASS?"
Draw" 6:1
Pt" CftaPman,

68 THE OUTPOST.
Our Sunday.
WE wake up with the realization-very
laggard-that Sunday has again arrived,
and in many cases complain of a headache
which we attribute to the absence of our usual
Swedish and 'double.' Civilians may suggest
another reason, but that is by the way.
The sun is streaming in at the windows and
foretells a glorious day. After a casual glance
in the mirror to see the effect of a longer sleep,
we busy ourselves in the preparation for the
Sunday parade to the Parish Church. Our
toilet is given extraordinary care this day, and
we are thankful for once that we don't have to
carry a pack, or even a " skeleton," which fact
lessens the number of brasses to polish. \Vith
a great deal of bustling we get through our
breakfast, and, after turning our white gloves
outside in, we put them on and make our way
to the parade ground, feeling very fresh, but
envying the boys who are lucky enough to be on
week-end leave. 'We find our platoon short of
almost half its complement, but, after the usual
roll-call, we make our sanctimonious way round
the corner and along Ayr Street to the Church
door, where we are greeted by an enthusiastic few
who wish to lengthen their lives by being out at
the early hour of 9.15 a.m. Once inside the
Church \ve hear what seems a battle between the
Pipe-Major and the pipe-organist, which, of
course, always results in victory for the kilty.
Dead silence isn't the order when we get seated,
as it is probably the first chance we have had of
recounting Saturday's experiences to each other,
and the Rev. ::VIr. Smith generally repeats his
hYmn announcements a few times before he is
satisfied we have all heard them. If the
hymns be of the Sunday School variety we are
in loud voice, but anything more advanced is
.---~--.-.-.---------
generally piped in more moderate tones. The
sermon finished, we, keep it dark, waken up
and put the finishing touch to the service by
singing the National Anthem. Outside, the
markers have already taken their places, and we
are soon marching behind the pipes along South
Beach. We meet practically the same people
on their way to Church every Sunday-notably
the young lady in black, who seems to be a
mother's darling, and the other one who can
actually smile to every section of fours throughout
the length of the column. The Esplanade
seems very long on Sundays, but, as we near the
parade ground, we put some extra spring into
our step so that before the crowd of onlookers
we may look the flower of Kitchener's Army.
There is something more impressive in our
dismissal salute on Sunday than on any other
day of the week, and we leave the parade ground
asking whether it is the white gloves or the
knowledge of an enlarged audience which
cause it. Some make their way to the docks
where they discuss torpedoes and other things
they know absolutely nothing about. After
dinner, the majority of the boys are usually to
be found on the Relief Golf Course accompanied
by swagger canes and flappers. The same
swagger canes often get left near Prestwick
later on in the evening, but what's that if the
flappers are brought home again! How dark
the place is as we wend our way to our billet!
To bed we go speculating as to whether
to-marrow's route march is going to be Ayr
again, but our hopes generally vanish in " air"
the following day, for "Nowhere" has been
located near Troon, and we go there far too
often.
Ecoy.
Drawn by THB KHAKI HAS AT LAST ARRIVBD. Pie. T~';mscn.

THE OUTPOST. 69,
"
,~
.
'
My DEAR YOUNG FRIENDS,
The Editor has asked me to write a
few words specially for you, and that is why
this letter is here.
I am going to tell you a little story.. One
day I saw some soldiers at drill, and I heard a
big, brave second-lieutenant, who is a very great
man indeed, tell them they were a lot of school
kids. Wasn't that funny of him!
But you are not big, brave soldiers yet, and
so I am just going to write a few little. childish
verses for you to read. I have no doubt that
some of the young recruits and the wee
lieutenants will also read them on the sly.
Now, the first verse will t~ach you that you
must always be clean and tIdy, and never be
late. Here it is; perhaps you have heard it
before;­
Little drops of water,
Little grains of sand.
Make rusty. gritty rifles.
Then a reprimand.
And the little moments.
Humble though they be,
Make us late at " fall in,"
Then we get C.B.
Should the soldiers be late for parade they are
bullied by a very terrible man called the
Regimental Sergeant-Major. But he means
well, and his bark is worse than his bite.
Listen to this
Kelly loves us. Yes. we know,
For he often tells us so :
If we don't behave too well,
He will run us all to -~l.
I have left the last word out because it is a
naughty word, and you might not like it. The
subs. can read this little poem instead; J think
they will like to read about themselves ;­
Twinkle. twinkle little star,
How I wonder what you are.
When you're on a khaki cuff
You denote a second.lieu·
Tenant. Great men? I don't think!
" Tennant's " also is a drink.
Now, I hope you will all be good little boys
and girls, and behave yourselves at school, or
your te",cher will give you black marks.
Lots of soldiers get black marks, too, and
when they get three black marks they have to
go before the Major and he gives them C.B.
Isn't it silly?
Perhaps you don't know what C.B. means.
\Vell! I will tell you. It means "Confined
to Brodie's," because you have to sit in Brodie's
Bar all night, and you just get out for a few
minutes every half hour to walk along to the .
Drill Hall and get a breath of fresh air.
And now here is a little competition for you.
Can you answer this little riddle :-" vVhy do
sergeants always keep on • yabbling , when we
are marching at attention?" It is not so easy
to answer as it looks,
You must write the answer very neatly on
Army Form B295-which only costs one halfpenny
if you go to the Quarter-Master, but if
you go to any stationer you get a hundred for
sixpence-and you must hand the answers to the
Company Orderly-Corporal before the Battalion
leaves Troon. So you will have lots of time.
At school you have a master, but in the army
we have only a quarter-master. I wonder if
you can tell me why he is only a quarter!
Because he is not all there? No 1 It is because
he only gives us about a quarter of our pay.
Now the Editor says I must stop, so I hope
you will send some nice little letters to
Your loving
UNCLE JAMES.
t t t
Good Luck to the Lads.
Air-" BONNIE DUNDEE,"
C
OME all you gay fellows who do yourselves well
In the pubs, at Mar Lodge, and the South
Beach Hotel j
Here's a toast for all times, be it morn, night, or
noon,
"Good luck to the lads who were quartered in
Troon ! "
Come fill up your glasses, and drink it with me,
Come fill up your glasses, and" sink it " with me,
With a hey I and a ho! that might reach to the
moon­
" Good luck to the lads who were quartered in
Troon! "
They've smart lads at Prestwick, and good boys in
Ayr:
At Gailes and Kilmarnock-they've stout fellows
there,
But take them together, platoon for platoon,
" Wha's like us? "--the lads who were quartered
in Troon!
Then let all the H.L.l. gather around,
Let ev'ry Royal Scot make the rafters resound,
And shout with a roar, like a raging typhoon:
" Hurrah for the lads who were quartered in Troon I"
A. K.

70 THE OUTPOST.
:>ang "Three for Jack." After the interval
Sergeant Thomson gave us another reading,
"Devil-may-care," and ':\liss Broadfoot again
appeared with her enchanting strings.
Sergeant Cohen gave us his second impersonation,
this time assuring us that" When I lays
dahn me tools, I lays 'em dahn!" Lieut.
Paterson serenaded us with a nice song.
Lieut. Marr, looking well in his newly acquired
khaki, which he has just donned after wearing
the private's blue serge, cheered us with a song
or two at the piano. The Choir finished the
second half of the entertainment, and Private
Hubbard, the conductor, must be congratulated
on the good performance of his apt pupils.
Altogether it was a most enjoyable evening.
t t t
Ballad of the Summer Girl.
WHAT nymph is she, do you surmise,
Sweet as Aurora at the dawn,
'Whom admiration can't surprise,
To whom all eyes are subtly drawn,
On whom the bhoys are crazy gone,
For whom, late in the afternoon,
They turn out spruce, and well-put-on ?
The Summer Girl has come to Troon.
M~\
-.______L­__IQ___ .l:sc...--;:r
~
THE Battalion Concert, which was held in
the Picture House, on Friday, 19th .!VIarch,
was an artistic and financial success. The
Belgian Relief Fund benefited from the proceeds
to the extent of over £70. The Colonel presided,
and around him were manv of the officers and
their friends, while the non-corns. and privates,
with a sprinkling of civilians, filled the rest of
the house. The Battalion Male Voice Choir
opened the programme with three well-rendered
songs. Private Erskine 3ang " Eleanore," and
as encore gave us Thomas .:\Ioore's touching
ballad, "She is far from the land "
Sergeant Thomson was fine in his rendition of
" The Green Eye of the Little YeUow God"
and "Snarley Yow." Following h:m came
Sergeant Cohen. made up as an old S:-M. 'Qf the
Red ,Army, who expatiated on our modern
mad, methods and weaknesses. Miss B.
Broadfoot treated us to a cOHple of very finely
pl.ayt?d violin solos, and Captain Russell
Nature in nothing else supplies
Such thrills as in that fairy fawn,
She makes the bhoys heave little sighs:
" Sandy, what dae ye think 0' yon? "
" My wor-r-rd, but she's a clinker, John,
I hope I'll get to know her soon! "
'What sets them dreaming thereupon?
The Summer Girl has come to Troon.
Dan Cupid, with his sly allies,
In spite of the 3rd Glasgow's brawn,
His arrow-shooting campaign plies
On promenade, street, links, and lawn.
\vny are our watches in the pawn?
Why are spare sponduliks a boon?
\Vhy have we grown so thin and wan?
The Summer Girl has come to Troon.
L'Envoi.
Princess, I've won no beauty prize,
I want to cut out my platoon;
Let me find favour in her eyes-
The Summer Girl has come to Troon.
W.H.
Dear Papa, I hope you're well,
There's nothing much in Troon to tell,
It's an expensive place, you know,
So please send me a pound or so.
\Ve're shifting under canvas soon,
I'll have to pay a cab from Troon,
Or hire a car to take my stuff
To camp·-I hope there's room enough.
With love, your patriotic kid,
Tom. (P,S.--Don't forget that quid).

.
THE ODTPOSl'. 71
..
C B is one of the many delightful privileges
• • which fall to the lot of any ordinary
private. There are innumerable methods of
gaining this distinction and participating in the
pastime (it is nothing else) of calling half-hourly
at the Guard Room from 6.30 till 10.30 of
an evening. A few of these will 'serve as
examples :-Comeon to the parade ground about
7.1 a.m.; pass jocose remarks to your neighbour
anent the personal appearance of some irritable
Non-Corn.; arrive on dress parade (9.15 a.m.)
disguised as a modem Esau; talk in stentorian
tones 'while standing at "'shun;" persistently
smoke cigarettes, or leave the "Hotel de
Brode" at 10.15 p.m. Having succeeded in
forcing s.ome one or other to take your name,
you will be called upon to interview the Major.
In th's trying ordeal an air of bovine calm, and
the reply" No, sir," to every question, has been
found to pay best. .
In spite of the large number who have already
gone through the experience and participated
Confined to Barracks.
in the delights of a day or two's C.B., only two
methods have been discovered of passing the
evening. The mest popular plan 1S to spend
the intervening spaces of twenty-five minutes
in one or other of the many proximate hostelries
and indulge in cop'ous libations; the draw- ,
backs being lack of funds on which to do oneself
well, and a probability of the punishment being
altered from c.B. to imprisonment for an
indefinite period, when one can neither smoke
nor drink. The other way is to be affable to the
Guard, which course may result in one of the
followIng queries :-" Will you make a
fourth?" "Do yo.u play solo?" "What
about shuffling the tickets?" By the time
9.30 p.m. has arrived many a delinquent has left
jingling shekels and followed by imprecations.
It must be clearlv understood that offenders
who have been aw"arded this punishment are
not entitled to write the letters "C.B." after
their names.
AET•
THE HALT OF THE SEASON-DUNDONALD.
P18. Thom.on.

72 THE OUTPOST.
LITTLE flower of azure hue.
Pretty little eyes of blue.
Emblem of the loyal and true~-
Forget-me-not.
Sweeter floweret never grew.
Nature ne'er gave nearer clue
Aright her message to construe-
Forget-me-not.
Conforter of friends apart,
Hearing balm of wounded heart.
Softly soothing sorrow's smart-
Forget-me-not.
J. M'K.
t t t
A Bitter Reverse.
(lI

'THE TPOST 73
Major W. AULD, V.D.

74 THE OUTPOST.
Marksmanship.
IT must never be forgotten that skill in
marksmanship is only acquired by earnest
personal effort. All mere reading about it,
or all the instructors in Scotland, could never
make a marksman of you if you do not apply
yourself with determination to succeed. Every
man who has properly passed the medical tests
at enlistment can make himself become a good,
reliable shot for service purpDses, even if he
may never develop into one of the noted crack
long-range target shots who lift the big prizes at
Bisley, Darnley, and other rifle meetings.
To judge smartlyhow far off an enemyis, to set
the back-sight accordingly, and to get the shot
off properly, quickly, and accurately, so as to
hit that enemy and stop him from making
himself disagreeable with his shooting, is the
highest form of marksmanship, and claims the
very first place in the varied phases of a
soldier's training. Xo matter if a man can dress
himself like a perfect fashion-plate, march like
a Guardsman, and be as handsome as Adonis,
still, if he be a clumsy, awkward, shaky rifleman,
he is practically useless as a real soldier.
After a man understands the elementary
principles of aiming and firing, then he must
exerc'se the qualities of determination and
will-power; he must force himself to concentrate
all his energies of mind and body on the shot he
is about to fire.
Just as the athlete trains his muscles, so
must the would-be marksman, by daily
snapp:ng practice, train the qualities of mind
just mentioned, so that his brain, his eye, and
his trigger-finger will all come to work
harmoniously together, and give h:m confidence
in h'8 increasing ability to master the many
little details which go to make up a correct aim
a'ld a perfect let-off. Good shooting may be
defined as a c:mglomeration of trivialities, but
g,)od shooting is no triviality, and must be the
ambition of every true soldier.
Position-drill and snapping-practice should
be gone through daily, or even several times
every day, and the following pJints should be
carefully noted ;­
Always open the breech of any weapon you
lift, and make certain the chamber is
empty. Don't be an ass of the" didn'tknow-it-was-loaded
" type.
Take some small, indistinct mark for aiming
at, imagine it at a certain distance, and
set your back-sight accordingly.
Take up a proper regulation firing position.
The positions laid down have been found
by years of endless experiment to give
the best results. To use any new, fancy
tricks in holding, aiming, or triggerpressing,
is a mistake.
Take aim and press the trigger as you have
been taught, and don't dwell too long on
the.aim-the eye gets tired.
Be able to tell where your sights were aligned
at the instant the trigger was released.
This is called" declaring the aim."
Hold your sights on the mark, after pressing,
for a couple of seconds.
Complete your practice with some snapshooting
and rapid-firing exercises.
Be sure your firing position, whether prone,
sitting, kneeling, or standing. is correct-with
good, firm grasp on the rifle, the butt well
pressed into the hollow of the shoulder (not out
on the muscle of the arm). and no cramped,
strained, uncomfortable feeling in any part of
your body.
In aiming, make sure that your sights are
upright, that the blade of your foresight is
central in the U, and that you take a full,
consistent sight for each she,t.
Trigger-pressing is the stumbling-block for
beginners, and th:s specially is where the
determination and concentratkm of thought
must be exercised, so as to secure. a good
let-off, without snatching or pulling, but
only by squeezing the thumb and fore-finger
towards each other.
Note also that the first joint c,f the forefinger
is put round the lowest part of the trigger.
not up at the top, where a much greater
leverage is required to release the mechanism.
A good exerc;se for testing your let-off is to
balance a coin near the muzzle, and try to press
the trigger without disturbing the coin.
You have heard of the old Highlandman who
indignantly declared that there was no " such
thing in the world as bad whisky, but some of it
is better than others." So, also, the man is not
yet hem who can hold a rifle absolutely steady
for any appreciable length of time, but some
men shake more than others. The whole secret
of a good let-off is to get into the knack of
applying the final pressure in the infinitesimal
fraction of time that the sights are truly aligned
on the mark. This is where the combined
act:on of brain. eye and trigger-finger comes in.
Accuracy must be a man's first consideration,
then rapidity will be practised. It is worse
than useless for a man to blaze away good
ammunition before he can do fairly well in
grouping and slow application practices. Th's
is recognised in the Musketry Training for the
New Army, where, out of the fourteen shoots
in the three stages (Instructional, Table A, and.
Table B), there is only one rapid-fire practice,.
at zoo yards.
Still, -the fact must not be neglected that good
rapid-fire is the ultimate goal, the ability to get
off three clips (15 rounds) of well-aimed shots
per minute, or, at least, to fire a named number

I
THE OUTPOST.
75
of rounds at that rate. In this connection, it
is interesting to note that the smartest handling
of the Short Lee-Enfield of which the writer is
aware, is the 32 aimed rounds in one minute (all
on the regulation target at 200 yards), fired by
Sergeant-Major Instructor of Musketry Wallingford.
This well-known Hythe specialist, now
Captain and Director of Musketry Instruction
in the Australian Army, had unrivalled
opportunities for rapid-fire practice, and the
above shoot is very probably a record for the
British service ri fl e.
General Sir O'Moore Creagh, V.C., mentions
that the maximum rate of fire of the German
Mauser rifle is about 9 rounds per minute, but
very few of their men are trained in rapid-firing,
and it is well-known that the long bolt and
clumsy, although powerful, bolt-closure preclude
continuous magazine fire from the
shoulder; besides, the Mauser clip is not so
easy to insert as the British. However, its very
high initial velocity and flat trajectory make
the ..vIauser an ideal rifle for sniping tactics.
German musketry officers at one time considered
our rapid-fire training as an utter waste
of time and ammunition, but they have
probably all changed their opinion now; wellqualified
German critics who have had to face the
rapid-fire of British Infantry describe it as the
most terrible instrument of destruction that has
yet been produced by warfare. A captured
German officer described it as H marvellous,"
and said that they had counted on being able
to rush the British troops at Mons, Le Chateau,
etc., by their" three-line" system of advancing,
but. had found that they were quite unable to
do so, even with their immense numbers,
because of the British rifle-fire which came" so
straight and so quick."
He plaintively added that " they had never
had a chance against the British," because,
although they had reckoned on their third line
with the machine guns being able to get within
400 yards, they had never once been able to do
this over anything like open ground, as their
first line was down too soon~-sometimes at 800
to rooo yards. This officer also mentioned
that at the Aisne his machine-gun battery came
under the concentrated fire of British infantry
at over rooo yards, and, while his men
suffered' severely, they were unable to reply to
the British, whom they could not see.
Just as the gallant English yeoman, in days of
long ago, spent infinite care on his cherished
long-bow, and as our hardy Scottish forefathers
kept their keen claymores and mighty
battle-axes in the finest possible fighting
condition, So their modern prototype, the
soldier of the New Army, should grudge neither
time nor trouble in attending to the thorough
cleaning and general care of his rifle. He must
keep a constant and vigilant eye on the rifling
and chamber, the sights, and the magazine,
seeing that they are thoroughly cleaned and
oiled after use, and in perfect working order at
all times. Let me, also, point out another
paramount duty which confronts the soldierto
be " master of himself" as well of his rifieto
avoid any excess which will militate against
a good mental, nervous, and physical condition.
Moderation in all things is the key to " a sound
mind in a healthy body."
Concentration of thought, firmness of
character, steadiness of muscle, clearness of
vision, and perfect nerve-control, are not
found in the man who swills his gallon a day, or
its equivalent in a more potent concoction, nor
are they found in the man who smokes 30
cigarettes per day. I do not suppose there are
any gallon-a-day men in our Battalion, but
undoubtedly the insidious cigarette has too
many devotees. Continuous blinking at
cinema pictures is another fruitful source of
eve-strain. .
- In short, if a man is not going to give himself
a thorough chance of becoming a good
marksman, then he may well sing, in the words
of our classic refrain, " Oh, why did I join the
H.L.I. ? "-or any other regiment for that
matter.
There are a great many other details and
theoretical principles on which one might
expatiate at considerable length, such as the
influences of wind on the bullet, effects of light
and shade, and of changes in barometric
pressures, on the aim, analysis of possible
faults in rifles or, more likely, in their firers, and
so on, but further remarks may perhaps be
better deferred to a future occasion.
M. DRuMMoND, Serge.
t t t
"While one of the companies was on outpost duty
the other evening, in the course of their special
training, a rather hospitable farmer's wife gave two
of our boys a very cheering cup of tea, and conseq
uently it has been suggested that a slight alteration
might be made in the Battalion's now famous song:
Outpost duty in cold weather,
Fills our hearts with dire distress,
But when cups of tea are going,
Outpost-­
The remainder of this line has been censored.
t t t
Of all the drill we ever got
None beats the joyous jinks
Of night manceuvring, what! what!
Upon the Prestwick Links.
Take cover, judging your own time,
Aye keep the" line" in mind,
The exercise is just sublime,
But-don't leave canes behind I

THE OUTPOST.
" ...... ' ."'''-\' .
Draw"by
"I SAID. 'RIGHT TURNI' WHERE THE 'ELL'S YOUR EARSIGHT?"
Our Watch Dogs.
NEVER been on guard? Well! You've
washed the dishes twice~-. That may be,
but until you have been on guard you can never
truly appreciate the military machine at its very
best. Kitchener may rest assured that no
matter how little attention he is able to give
to our Battalion, the Guard goes on for ever-at
least it goes on every night.
I was Corporal of the Guard. which made the
job even more entertaining. though I was told
by one of the sentries at the Drill Hall that
watching for the Officer of the Day on his
visiting rounds was far more exciting than, on
outpost duty, watching for an enemy that
didn't exist. Then. too. the race with the
Sergeant-Major to turn out the Guard when the
sentry had been surprised, is described as an
excellent cure for liver complaints. This
business of calling out the Guard is always a
troublesome affair, and many are the valuable
solo hands that have been nipped in the bud
on the call of " Guar-r-d-turn out." During
a popular breakfast hour I was left in sole
command of the Guard Room, which contained
two men of the Guard and two prisoners.
Kipling says there is no crime in the New Army
--neither there is-it's just cussedness. A
surprise call to turn-out saw me rush away
with my two men for inspection, but I was
hastily drawn up by the prisoners-who, mark
you. are· not supposed to utter a wordcomplaining
bitterly that they were being left
without one of the guard to protect them.
That meant that only two men, including the
sentry, turned out with the Corporal. It also
meant an expLanation.
What is an armed party within the
meaning of the Act? This is always a matter
for debate, but, since men who don't carrv arms
have a very poor argument, it would appear
quite natural to go on with your game and
allow the alleged armed party to drop their
picks and shoveL~ in the Drill Hall without
official recognition from the Guard.
Changing reliefs is a thrilling experience, and
to be able to give" eyes right" or " eyes left"
to bearers of the King's Commission is truly
uplifting for a supernumerary Lance-Corporal.
Butdifficulties arise, as when I gave" eyes right"
to the O.C. a Gailes Company, and then saw our
Colonel approaching at the same time on ou~
left. Only, by judiciously timing to get a well

THE OUTPOST.
77
loaded lorry to come between the Colonel and
the reliefs was I able to avoid getting myself
tied in a knot and the eyesight of my men
permanently damaged by trying to give two
salutes at once. As the Corporal has to listen
to the sentries giving over their orders 26 times
during 24 hours, he will never require to learn
them again. Some of the orders are distinctly
good and distinctly military. In time of peace,
a fire at Mar Lodge would see you call up the
Fire Brigade, but under the present regime
you call up the Adjutant. What room the
Adjutant occupies is a mystery, and the job
of finding him always struck me as full of great
possibilities, and an Outpost article a probable
outcome. Rumour has it that he sleeps in
Room No. I3. but I can hardly believe this.
Did you ever hear of the wicked way in
which a weary Corporal changed the sentries
between the dark hours from midnight to
6 a.m.? Well, being certain that the Se:r:geant
was asleep, he just took the reliefs outside the
Guard Room and told them to swop for
themselves, as he had to go back to see that the
fire, didn't go out. That Corporal is now a
Sergeant-serveshim right. To witnessthereliefs
provisioning themselves for their hvo hours'
duty made one think of the enormous job the
A's'.C. has to face. One man was taking out so
manv eatables that I had to remind him that
he was going out to his beat and not to his meat.
\Vhat puzzled me most was what the
Sergeant was meant to do besides sleep. The
only time our Sergeant really showed any
animation was when the Orderly Officer handed
over the recognised ten bob to celebrate the
occasion of his name being gazetted-with the
remark, "Custom of the Army, Sergeant!"
Two working Corporals would be a bettel
scheme, but then, I suppose, they must
encourage the desire for promotion somehow,
-the military machine at work again.
I enjoyed my spell of guard, but I could never
find anything in the King's Regulations, or
elsewhere, entitling the prisoners to the two best
seats in the Guard Room.
GIAH.
'A hearty response'*'has'*'been'*' given to the appeal
for Pennies to send Nestle's Milk to our first line
Battalion at the Front; over £6 wascollected, and
we were able to send quite a large consignment.
Thank you, gentlemen.
\Ve now recommend
that this be made a monthly donation, so that
the second line Battalion may also benefit.
'*' .~ t
M. F. Thompson, 17 Gordon Street, Glasgow,
will supply you with a good tonic if you are
physically" fed up," and should route-marching
give you any trouble, his Foot-Joy will scan
put you right.
I'VE played for the Rangers, the Celts and Queen's
Park:
International games two or three
Were won by my being a tower of strength
To my side, for I'm Sandy M'Phee.
At dribbling a ball through the backs to the goal
There is none who can do it like me ;
I have dam nearly won a match all by myself,
For they're frightened of Sandy M'Phee.
I can skim down the' touch' with the ball at my toe,
And jink backs as I'd jink round a tree;
A hundred yards out I can send in a shot
That would kill a man-I am ::\1'Phee !
The clubs in the south are aye nosing around
\Vith a big cheque and fat transfer fee,
And Andrew Carnegie may come, if he likes,
But he'll never buy Sandy M'Phee.
The papers are full every Saturday night
How I diddied the men against me ,
It's a snip, if I play, that my side always wins,
I'm infallible Sandy M'Phee.
The ladies flock in from the East and the West
\Vhen we're playing at home, for you see,
They're daft about football, at least so they say,
Blit they're all after Sandy M'Phee.
The bhoys hang around for a glimpse of my face,
They're as happy as happy can be
\Vhen I tip them a wink, or give a bit nod,
I'm their hero-I'm Sandy M'Phee.
I drive my own car like a blooming old lord;
And no peeler would ever pinch me,
They'd lie in the gutter for me to run o'er,
It's an honour from Sandy ::\1'Phee.
W.H.

78 THE OUTPOST.
The Scout's Report.
FROM information received from a hitherto reliable
source, we understand that a certain private in our
Battalion, who wishes to qualify as a scout, decided,
in pursuit of this worthy ambition, to practice
scou~ing in his spare time and write model reports
on h1S observations. Apparently he lost his note
book, which the finder kindly handed in to our
office, and in order to discover the owner, we print
one of his reports. By applying at this office
between the hours of 12 p.m. and 6 a.m. he will
find the book referred to in Our Glory Hole, where
it is being used as a Day Book.-Editor.
On the evening of Monday, 29th February,
about the hour of 7 p.m., I proceeded, as the
crow flies, to the Esplanade. There were few
people in the vicinity, but after a few moments
I espied a female figure proceeding leisurely in
a westerly direction. Thinking to obtain some
valuable information, I approached her and
tactfully engaged her in conversation, when the
following dialogue took place ;­
lv!e.-Good evening.
She.-(A stony silence and head turned
smartly seawards, as in Eyes Right.)
Ale.-It's a nice evening.
She.-I don't think I have the pleasure of
your acquaintance.
1Y!e.-1 don't mind that. I can introduce
myself.
She.-(Haughtily.) You are very impertinent.
1Vle.~-·(l\llmicking.) Knut at all! Would
you mind taking me for a walk?
She.-(:Ylore haughtily.) If you don't take
yourself off at once, I shall give you in charge of
the first policeman I see.
It being evident that no progress could be
made and that capture was imminent, I
executed a tactical movement to the rear.
My mental equi.librium having been slightly
disarranged by this episode, I proceeded in the
direction of the town for the .purpose of
ascertaining what liquid refreshment suitable
for troops could be obtained there. Before
long I discovered a well-known local character
making for a place within the meaning of the
Act, and him I stealthily approached and
followed beyond the folding doors giving access
to what is colloquially or affectionately known
as a Pub. After opening the conversation,
I said:­
" \Vhat's your age? "
"Twenty-three," he replied, looking surprised.
"\Vhat's yours? "
"Thanks," I answered. "I'll have a
whisky and soda."
Having thus succeeded in tempting him to
imbibe alcohol, I had great hopes that he
would become garrulous and enable me to
gather information as to the presence of alleged
soldiers in the neighbourhood; but to my
surprise he became exceedingly taciturn and
spake not a word. Disappointed, I left him
to his own resources and continued my operations.
On betaking myself in a southerly direction
towards the neighbourhood of the Marine Hotel,
I observed, among the sand dunes, a female in
the company ofa male, attired in a blue suitevidently
a trayesty of a military uniform. In
order to approach them unseen, I deployed to
the left flank and suddenly precipitated myself
into a deep trench, known locally as a" bunker,"
filled with mud and water which, judging from
its taste, appeared to have been poisoned,
indicating the probable activity of a treacherous
enemy.
Extricating myself, I cautiously approached
the party under observation with the intention
of overhearing their conversation and reporting
same. The following mysterious words were
spoken :­
The female suspect.-Darling!
The male ditto.-Yes, duckie, what is it ?
The female ditto.-Nothing-only darling!
Thereupon the lips of the parties came into
close proximity and they simultaneously
emitted a sound like a soldier supping soupevidently
a signal to an enemy submarine in the
offing.
Unfortunately at this moment I was observed
by the male suspect, and in accordance with
" the first duty of a scout," I endeavoured to
retreat rapidly. The enemy overtook me,
however, and attacked me vigorously. He was
heavily armed and inflicted considerable injury
by means of a loaded cane and hobnailed boots,
uttering the while strange words in a foreign
tongue, which I have been unable to trace in
any dictionary. \Vhen I succeeded in effecting
my escape, I crawled to the nearest hospital,
where this report is being written.
In spite of my injuries I shall not be deterred
from the pursuit of my ambition to become a
scout. and shall resume my operations in the
course of two or three months, when I have
recovered.
M. L.
Your King and Country need you,
And we think you olJght to go
To do the soldier's noble job,
And try to live on seven bob,
U Double" in boots that weigh five pounu,
Crawl on your knees on dam-damp ground,
Get groused at by the N.C.O.s,
And, on the top of other woes,
Find that .your khaki-blanco tin
Is now for keeping tallow in.

THE OUTPOST.
79
Ever since the elimination of Rugby and Hockey,
Association has formed the main­
Association stay of the Battalion Sports, and
Football. every Wednesday lIO footballers
obtain an opportunity of participating
in the national game. Our Platoon League,
which has recently been formed, has proved a great
success, the only fault being the great want of
suitable pitches to enable us to get through our
games in the" limited" tiine at our disposal.
The results have shown that A Company's talent
appears to be confined to No. I Platoon, who are so
far undefeated, whilst B Company rely solely on
No. 6 to defend their sporting reputation.
The positions in the League to date are as follows:
Platoon.
No. 6,
No. I,
No. 15,
No. 16,
No. 10,
No. 7,
No. 12,
No. 13,
No. 11,
No. 2,
No. 19,
No. 4,
No. 14,
No. 17,
No. 9.
No. r8,
No. 5,
No. 3,
No. 20,
No. 8,
No. 6 by
GOALS.
,-'-..
P. W. L. D. For Ag'st. Pt,.
3 3 0 0 30 . 4 6
3 3 0 0 13 2 6
3 3 0 0 II 3 6
2 2' 0 0 12 4 4
3 2 1 0 13 4 4
3 2 I 0 II 7 4
3 2 lOll 11 4
2 0 I 3 2 3
2 I 0 5 4 2
3 I 2 0 7 7 2
2 1 0 5 6 2
2 0 4 6 2
2 0 5 9 2
:I I 2 0 5 20 2
2 0 I I 3 4
3 0 3 0 2 6 0
2 0 2 0 I 7 0
2 0 2 0 2 12 0
3 0 3 0 7 18 0
2 0 2 0 2 16 0
virtue of their goal scoring abilities
occupy the leading position on the table, but Nos. 15
and 16 Platoons of D Company are well to the fore,
and at the same time they have got over stiffer
hurdles than No. 6.
C and E Companies have not fared quite so wel!,
their platoons having allsuffered at least one reverse.
There is really no outstanding platoon in C Company,
because, although No. 9 is plaeed last, they have
been rather unfortunate, and are sure to come away
strong in their remaining games.
No. 19 Platoon have proved themselves to be E
Company's strongest team, and judging by their
recent form they are sure to give any team in the
League a hard run for it.
vVithin the pa.~t month quite a number of intra­
Brigade games of " Soccer" have been played. On
\Vednesday, loth March, A Company of ours
played A Company of the 13th (5.) Battalion, The
Royal Scots, the result being a draw, 2 goals each.
On the same day No. 19 Platoon of ours beat another
Royal Scots' XI. by 10 goals to 3. In our last issue
we published a letter from B Company, I6th (5.)
Battalion H.L.I. asking for fixtures; on Tuesday.
23rd March, our No. 6 Platoon travelled to Gailes
and beat No. 7 Platoon of the 16th by .'\ goals to I.
The game caused much interest and a goodly
number of supporters from Troon accompanied the
team. It did not take long to find who were to be
the ultimate winners, for the forwards of No. f)
Platoon settled down at once into a long swinging
style of play, and completely mastered their
opponents' defence. The score, I goal to nil at
half-time, did not represent the run of the play, for
it does not show the extent of the superiority of
our No. 6. In the second half they rattled on other
four goals, while losing only one, and ran out easy
winners by 5 goals to 1. The game was well worth
travelling to see, and No. 6 Platoon are to be
complimented on the fine exhibition they gave.
While all did extremely well, special mention might
be made of Privates Hill and Follett; the former's
flash runs and the latter's elusive dribbling were
quite the features of the game.
A very interesting match took place on the Polo
Ground on the evening of \Vednesday, 31St MarCh,
between teams representing the \Vartant Officers,
Staff-Sergts. and Sergts. of the Battalion and the
Petty Officers of H.M.S., T ..B.D. "Rifleman."
Teams :-17th H.L.I., C.Q.-M .. S. Core,' C.S.-M.
M'Luskey and e.Q.-M.-S. Williams; Pipe-Major
Gilbert, Sergt.-Bugler Paterson and Sergt. Mack;
Sergt. Hamilton, Sergt. Tilley, Sergt..Major Kelly,
Sergt. Angus and Sergt. Ferguson. H.M.S.
Destroyer, "Rifleman:" P.O. Verning; P.O.
Murphy and P.O. Pearson; P.O. \Vycroft. E.R.A.
Chicken and P.O. Marks; P.O. Oman, C.P.O.
Bernie, P.O. Colli;;,:e.P.O. Breen and c.P.O. Keast.
Notable absentees in the Army team included,
O..R.-Sergt. Copland and e.-Q.-M.-S. Ferris, and the·
defence of our team was therefore considerably
weakened. S.-M. Kelly kicked off and it was
ea.~i1y seen that the Navy had found their land feet,
as their bustling centre soon made his presence felt.
The first goal, however, fell to the Army, who were
showing, if anything, better tactics. c.P.O.
Murphy on the right did splendid work for the Navy
and the bulkiness of their goalkeeper narrowed the
opening for any possible chances that came the
way of the Army shots. Just before half-time the
Navy equalized through a magnificent cross from
the right. The point was thoroughly deserved.
The second half, though devoid of scores, was
brimful of interest, and the spectators, amongst

80 THE OUTPOST.
whom were many officers, got fnll value. C.-S..M.
M'Luskey and C..Q..M..S. Williams tackled beauti.
fully, and the Army centre, althongh a bit stiff,
showed his knowledge of the finer points of the
game. \Vell on in the game, Sergt. Angns sent in a
lightning shot which was stopped by a Navy hand,
and from the subsequent penalty, the Navy
custodian brought off a great save. Tom Core, the
Army goalkeeper, was also great, and if only the sun
had not shone at the psychological moment, the
ball would never have beaten him at all, and the
Navy would not have got that equalizer. Still, one
goal each was a very satisfactory ending to a very
happy game.
A regrettable incident occurred shortly after the
match had started. Sergt. \Vishart of the Army
team was unfortnnate enough to sustain a fractured
ankle. Both teams, and the members of the
Battalion generally, extend their deepest sympathy
and wish him a happy sojourn in Stobhill and a
speedy recovery.
On the same day as the above game, a scratch
Battalion team beat another team from H.M.S.
T.·B.D. " Rifleman," by 5 goals to 1.
Our Tennis season is now in full swing, and we
have had splendid weather in which
Tennis. to take advantage of the kindness
of the Troon Tennis Club in giving
us their courts. For those of us who play, March
has been about onr most enjoyable month in the
Army. So far there has been a scarcity of inter·
company matches. On \Vednesday, 24th MarCh,
B Company was playing E Company, but the match
had to be stopped owing to rain. There are a
number of good Tennis players in the Battalion, and
many of us would like a series of inter.company
games to be inaugurated just to see how we stand.
" Harold" is grateful for the use of the courts,
and will be very sorry when the time comes to
make way for the Club members.
This strenuous exercise has lately been included
in the programme of Wednesday
Tug-of-War. afternoons, and Company Commanders
have even gone so far as
to introduce it into their day's work, in order to give
variety to the daily. round, and also to use up our
superfluous energy. It certainly does relieve the
tedium of a forenoon's bayonet.fighting to finish
up with.a few section or platoon tug-of-war contests.
Great interest has attached to the Company" pulls ..
on \Vednesdays, as each Company is anxious to
prove itself superior. On Wednesday, loth Mareh,
C Company beat A Company and B Company beat
E Company, while D Company was on Special
Training and could not compete. The following
week B Company was on Special Training, and the
contests resulted in C Company beating E Company
and A Company beating D Company. On Wedues.
day, 24th March, it was A Company's turn tobe away
on Special Training and the following were the results
among the other companies: C Company beat
B Company, D Company beat E Company. From
these results it will be seen that C Company is
unbeaten, winning three out of three. A Company
has won one and lost one, as also have B Company
and D Company, while E Company has lost three
out of three.
The performance of our teams at the Military
Cross.Country Meeting at Bogside,
Cross-Country on 27th March, was a splendid
Running. testimony of the training and
physical fitness of our men. This
is not merely judged from the results, good as they
are, but from the fact that although numerous
competitors fell out on the way, all our teams stuck
to it well, and, almost without exception, every man
ran to a finish. Twelve teams competed and four
of our Company teams were in the first seven, as
noted in Orders, but it may interest our readers
to know the other competing teams who were not
in the first seven. These were C Company, 16th (5.)
Battalion H.L.L; 5th Argyll and Sutherland
Highlanders, 1st line; Renfrewshire Fortress Royal
Engineers (2nd line); aud 18th L.F.A. R.A.M.C.,
Y orkhill. As we all know, after going about two
miles of the course the leading string of some
twenty.two runners went off the trail and were
disqualified. Unfortunately, the majority of these,
some fourteen or fifteen, were our best men, including
Private J. Bruce, D Company, Privates Deans and
Rogerson, A Company, Privates Barrie, Dunlop and
Paterson, B Company, Private M'Lean, C Company,
etc. In spite of this severe handicap, W/'l managed
to secure most of the prizes, four of our men being
placed in the first six home, surely a fitting reward
for all our conscientious cross·country running on
\Vednesdays.
RESULTS.
INDIVIDUAL PRIZES.
Ist-Private Merrilees, 15th (S.) Battn. The Royal
Scots.
2nd-Private J. Allan, 17th (5.) Battn. H.L.L,
B Company.
3rd-Private J. Hillier, 16th (S.) Battn. H.L.L,
B Company.
4th-Private Glen. 17th (S.) Battn. H.L.l., C Company.
WINNING TEAMS.
1st-Battalion Team, 15th (S.) Battn., The Royal
Scots.-III points.
2nd-A Company Team, 17th (5.) Battn., H.L.L
Sergt. Ritchie, 10; Private Slater, 13; Private
Hyslop, 15; Private Currie, 17; Private J. E.
Rogerson, 26; Private Hawthorn, 3r.­
Il2 points.
3rd--D Company Team, 17th (5.) Battn., H.L.L
Private J. Reid, 5; L,.Cpl. Lothian, 7;
Private Grant, IO; Private Archibald, 27;
Private J. F. Stllbbs, 29; Private Bowman, 33.
4th-B Company Team, 17th (5.) Battn., H.L.L
Private J. Allan, 2; Private D. G. M'Meechan,
12; Private J. Dawson, 20; Private Aitken·
head, 23; Corpl. Todd, 30; Private Wilson, 42.
The three Glasgow Battalions H.L.I. entered
Company Teams as requested, but certain units
were allowed to enter one Battalion Team. Taking
Battalion results only. the 17th (5.) Battn., H.I..L
were easily first with 34 points ;-Private J. Allan
(B Company), 2; Private Glen (C Company). 4;
Private Reid (D Company). 5; Private Harper
(E Company), 6; L .. CorpL Lothian (D Company),
7; Sergt. Ritchie (A Company), IO.

THE OUTPOST.
81
Our Sports Parade.
ON Wednesday afternoons the streets of
Troon present an extraordinary spectacle.
All the shops are closely shuttered, and in the
houses lining the main thoroughfares the blinds
are drawn; careful mothers shut their
daughters in rooms overlooking backyards;
even the very dogs which are wont to bark
their appreciation of the Battalion shoot up
alleys, tails between legs.
The casual stranger immediately concludes
that Lady Godiva has come to life again, and is
at her old tricks. He is wrong, but very hot on
the scent. Instead of that historical dame,
however, it is a host of males eager to emulate
her example, and dressed, not as she was in a
wealth of glorious hair-for they have little or
none, poor fellows-but in transparent running
zephyrs, through which one sees the blush that
mantles their manly chests, and khaki shorts
specially made for bantam boy scouts.
Let us not prejudice them. Ordinarily,
they, like most young men from Glasgow, are
modest and retiring to a degree, and would feel
embarrassed if caught in their shirt sleeves.
Nevertheless, on this particular afternoon they,
one and all, succumb to a desire to rush into
the street in as critical a state of undress as
possible. It may be due to something in the
atmosphere.
Taken by surprise the first time, the douce
folks of Troon stood aghast, incredulous of their
eyesight, but now, on the advice of their elders
and church deacons, they retire behind their
more or less well-fitting blinds and curtains
until the phenomenon has passed. Even
yet, however, an occasional maiden is taken
unawares and makes off in dismav after the
first horrified glance. Some, indeed, are said
to remain rooted to the spot as if paralysed.
(I have no particulars as to the latter, but I
am making diligent enquiries.)
Common justice compels me to admit having
been seized with the same disorder myself, but
my modesty is such that before I can screw
myself to the sticking point, the other members
of the billet are ready, and consequently leave
me but little choice of attire-if I may so term
it. I am not difficult to please, however, and,
donning a pair of shorts-split and discarded by
a plumper man than myself, black stockings
stolen from my landlady's daughter (a charming
creature, but not over fond of soldiers), arid a
white sweater which looks as if it, too, belonged
to her, but doesn't, I sally forth to join the
revellers, and, incidentally, put the R.S.·M. in
a good humour.
Taken en masse we are an inspiring sight.
Almost every kind of leg is to be seen, and it is
related that an N.C.O. whose duty it was to go
round the camp in the early morning shouting
"show a leg," was so overwhelmed by his
apparent success that he now issues his orders
in a whisper.
The precise nature of the revels in which we
are supposed to indulge is somewhat obscure,
as, by a strange fatality, a heavy downpour of
rain just as we are formed up on parade, causes
the powers that be to dismiss us hastily to our
billets. It may be also that the powers
aforesaid, seeing the all too successful result of
their labours, are glad to wash their hands of the
whole affair ..
What the local opinion is I can guess, and my
sympathy is with the natives, but what is one
to make of the unquestionably unprecedented
demand for houses for the Easter holidays and
the great influx of visitors of the fair sex?
Drawn by
BEE.
I
THE ETERNAL QUESTION: WHERE r
PI•. M'Nidder.

82 THE OUTPOST.
OUR LETTER BOX.
To THE EDITOR OF "THE OUTPOST."
SIR,
The following appeal from a Company
Sergt.-Major of the King's o..,n Scottish
Borderers has been forwarded to me by Mr.
\Vm. Jones, Secretary to the Insurance
Committee for the Burgh of Glasgow, 59 Bell
Street, City, asking me to do the best I can.
If members of the Battalion or their friends can
assist, please communicate with Mr. Jones
direct. I personally know Coy. Sergt.-Major
Fitzgerald, and any articles sent will be greatly
appreciated by him and his interned companions
in arms.
R. S.-M. KELLY.
[COpy.]
My address is-
No. 5741, Coy. Sergt.-Major Fitzgerald,
2 K.O. Scottish Borderers,
Hut 10/8.
GEFANGENEN-LAGER DOEBERITZ,
DEUTSCHLAND, 3/3/15.
DEAR WILL,
I am writing to let you know that we
are getting on all right, and to ask you to
interest yourself on behalf of our needy ones.
Will it be asking too much of you to collect
any part-worn underclothing (shirts, vests,
pants, etc.). that any friends may care to give,
and send them in bundles addressed to me.
They will be extremely useful, when the warm
weather comes, as a change of underclothing. I
am all right myself. but there are some of us
here who get nothing from home and have to
depend on the kindness of others. Packets of
tobacco, etc., would also be very useful.
Best wishes to all from
(Signed) NED.
SIR,
Members of the Battalion will soon be
turning their thoughts from football to cricket,
and here, a.

THE OUTPOST.
Drawn by
A DREAMER OF DREAMS.
Comrades in Arms.
SOLDIERING, soldiering through the war
together,
Never mind the way we go, never mind what port:
Follow trails leaving Gailes, start in any weather,
·While we're marching side by side everything is
sport.
Soldiering, soldiering, leaving care and worry,
Never mind the "if" and "but," words for
coward lips,
Put them out with" fear" aJild " d6ubt ; " in the
-paek with" hurry,"
While we march, a sturdy throng, forth to camps
or ships.
Soldiering. soldiering, where our duty calls us,
Never mind what others say, or what others do,
Should they rather stay at home, heedless what
befalls us,
We will do our little bit, striving to be true.
Soldiering, soldiering, kee,P your spirits cheery,
Never mind the" why' of it, duty must be done.
Truth and right win the fight; remember when
you're weary
Wrongs are yet to be avenged against the coward
Hun.
Soldiering, soldiering, although we should go under
Fighting in a noble cause, giving of our best,
There will be for you and me, lying over yonder,
Solace in that other Land wherein the weary rest.
J. B. (GAILES).

84 THE OUTPOST.
A COMPANY.
pRIOR to our commencing our second week of
special training, the Company indulged in a
few days' preliminary canter, comlt)encing on
Tuesday, I6th March, when we attacked a position
on Dundonald Hills in ideal, Riviera weather. The
larks trilled their lay, the few.days.old lambs
gambolled about their sedate dams, and a primrose
or two, peeping bashfully from mossy neuks here
and there, made our creeping to the fire position
quite sweet. On Wednesday forenoon we paraded
at the Drill Hall, where the smaller lads were fitted
out with khaki, while the taller bhoys stood enviously
by to await the arrival of the larger garments,
which, it is said, are coming soon.
The afternoon was spent in cross.country running,
football, tug.oi.war, and so forth. We have in our
Company the winner of the battalion five mile
record, in the person of Private Deans of No. 4
Platoon. \Ve have also pulled the D Company
team all over the grass at the t,ug·of.war. Thursday
was spent on the Municipal Golf Course, where we
practised little attacks in a biting north·east wind,
and on Friday we graced the battalion route march
to nowhere in particular. On Saturday we took
over rifles and bayonets from,B Company. Special
training on Monday, 22nd March, found us near
Irvine, on the Gailes Golf Course, where we
attacked a position in such a masterly fashion that
Major Paul, in a transport of delight, characterised
it as the best he had seen done in the western
hemisphere, Tuesday saw us at the Reservoir,
above which we commenced a subtle attack against
a position beside Hillhouse mansion. Our piper
blew down his pipes as we charged over the last
few yards, for which he will receive an iron cross.
At night we guarded the Kilmarnock·Gailes road
junction, and the way No. 3 Platoon doubled over
the half·mile from their reserve position was magni.
ficent. We trekked to a place just behind
Dundonald on \Vednesday in a close atmosphere,
and during a halt the boys divested themselves of
jerseys, and many took out their towels to wipe
away the exuding adipose tissue from their
perspiring persons. The Brigadier.General was
present, fresh and spruce, looking as though he had
stepped out of a military canvas of Edouard
Detaille, and half·way through the attack he gave
the officers and N.C.O.s an invaluable tip or two.
It rained during the march back, and, wet to the
skin, we were dismissed for the night. We did not
parade until I p.m. on Thursday-at least, not the
privates-and then we proceeded to Harpercroft,
south of Dundonald, from whence we attacked a
position at the so.called Roman Ca.mp, 500 feet
above sea leveL \Ve ma.rched from there, after
lunch, to Dundonald village, and in the evening
played at outposts and piquets, The field kitchen
came out with hot coffee, which tasted like ambrosia
to the cold and hungry. During the march back
we resurrected the old Scots songs, and at 9,45 we
were dismissed, and got the rest of the night to
ourselves. \Ve sited trenches beside the Todcigs
burn, due east of Dundonald, on Friday, and laid
out wire entanglements, behind which we repulsed
an attack by a strong enemy in close formation.
\Ve suffered no casualties. Saturday was spent
partly at the Drill Hall, where we handed over
arms to C Company, and partly at the Unionist
Rooms, where we got our letters, parcels, passes,
and our microscopic monetary remuneration.
Lieutenant Gardner, of No. 3 Platoon, and Sergeant.
;'vIajor Dobbie, have been to Strensall to go through
a machine-gun and musketry course. Quarter.
Master.Sergeant Ferguson took up S.·:\I. Dobbie's
duties in the latter's absence. Private Leslie Orr,
Associate Royal Technical College, No. 4 Platoon,
has been gazetted to a commission in the R.G.A.,
and thus we lose another good man. It is reported
that Mick, one of our pets, has been missing for over
a week at his abode, and it is feared he has wandered
into some wood and died in a trap. Two pets in
two monthsl
B COMPANY.
WE have got through our second week of special
training, and were specially favoured in the
way of weather. On our first day the attack thro'
the woods N.E. of the Reservoir was not so energetic
and spirited as usual, doubtless due to our missing the
usual morning run and" physical" before breakfast.
In the evening we successfully held the Loans­
Dundonald road, and path through the Glen, with
only the loss of a rifle bolt. \Ve had become quite
adept at charging in the" On Guard" position with
bayonets fixed and are naturally disappointed at
now having to assault with rifles at the slope.
However" ours not to reason why." Our third
day on Gailes area was interesting and instructive,
but without incident if we except the wiping out of
No. 5 Platoon in their heroic attempt to assault our
defensive position. In the evening we were guard·
ing the Irvine-Ayr road and Kilmarnock railway,
and must compliment the supports, posted at
Barassie Farm, on the rapidity with which they came
up to the piquet when the latter was attacked,
although, of course, the piquet had not the slightest
need of them. On our fourth day we marched
through a mixture of snow and dust to the area
round Newfield House, but owing to snow, ploughed
land, and red flags, the attack fell flat, and the only
decent bit of fighting was the snowballing at the
intervals.
Our final field day was on Troon Old Course, and
judging distance in the forenoon was quite exhilar·
ating; one never knew exactly what would happen
next. For one thing, section commanders learned
that it was not their business to lie with their
section basking in the sun while their sister sections
were straining their eyesight to gauge how far off
they were. The low percentage of error was very
satisfactory, but then that's where golf tells. On
Saturday we parted with our rifles and received our
hard.earned pay.

,THE OUTPOST.
85
We paraded for khaki uniform in a state of mild
excitement and expectation. It soon cooled off,
however. Apparently, we had got a consignment
intended for the" Bantams" at Gir'Van. Certainly,
some got trousers, but only a few were able to
struggle into tunics. \Ve can only hope our blue
will hold together till the arrival of extra size khaki,
but, what with scaling walls. vaulting fences, and
clearing obstacles, there is really no saying what may
happen. We have now completed our course of
bayonet-fighting under Sergt. Shuttle, and with a
little more practice we reckon to give a very good
account of ourselves when it comes to cold steel.
We congratulate No. 12 Section on winning the
prizes given by Major Young in the Competition
for the best section average at deliberate and rapid
fire on the Miniature Range. Other six members
of B Company have departed to take up Commissions,
viz.; Lance-Sergt. J. C. Thomson.
Privates R. Maxwell, D. D. MacMillan, S. H, Dow,
R. M'L. Laing and J. Ainslie Miller. Our best
wishes go with them.
In athletics No. 6 Platoon have so far won all
their Platoon League Matches and they look like
being as formidable in football as they are in relay
racing. On one of the sports days. recently, they
had actually three elevens playing. Since the
closure on the Polo Ground our rugby and hockey
teams have taken to other games and are making
good practice at tennis and association football.
No. 8 Platoon, however, have been recently engaged
in one or two very friendly games of hockey away
from Troon. Most enjoyable outings from all
accounts. Itis rumoured also that the old Hillhead
boys (No. 7) have followed their lead, but, like the
Press Bureau, we can neither homologate nor deny.
Although muscular and well balanced. B Company
Tug-oi-war ''team is perhaps on the light side, and,
after beating E Company, succumbed rather easily
to the crack C Company team. Our next contest
is with A Company and should prove an interesting
tussle. We are also down to play A Company at
golf and tennis and look forward to the re'sults
with confidence. B Company need· not be disappointed
over their performance in the Military
Cross-Country Team Race. Three of Our best
runners; Privates Barrie. C. B. Dunlop and G. K.
Paterson, unfortunately went on a wrong course,
and our other nine runners all finished over the full
. five mile course, which shows the stamina of our
men. Our reserves did exceedingly well, particularly
Privates M'Dougall and Aitkenhead, who
finished 12th and 23rd respectively. The feather
in our cap was Priyate J. Allen; not only was he
the first man home in our Battalion but he finished
second in a' field of 144 runners-a brilliant performance
on which we heartily congratulate him.
Another _military Cross-Country ~Ieeting is likely
to take place two or three weeks hence, so we shall
have this further opportunity of showing what we
can do.
B Company is certainly taking full advantage of
the tennis courts.
The first match was played on Wednesday. 24th
March-B Company v. C Company, but, owing to
the usual \Vednesday afternoon weather, the game
had to be left unfinished; the first four couples of
B Company having each won the first set.
C COMPANY.
A FTER the completion of the second week's
special training it was evident that appreciable
progress had been made on the first week's work;
more especially, perhaps. in the direction of the
individual interest tbat the men were taking in the
various manceu vres. The men seemed to understand
more correctly and clearly what was required of
them, and to have a better idea of the situation.
Not only so, but with very few exceptions they
endeavoured to act up to their knowledge, which
naturallv resulted in very much better results being
obtained. Apart from the reason that the rank and
file now recognise that they should conform to the
directions given by their officers regarding getting
up and down quickly, seeking the best available
cover, and so on, the men of C Company are anxiolls
to do their best to repay in some measure, and in
the only way open to them. the consideration of our
Company Commander at all times, but more especially
during these training weeks, who is making
the work on hand more interesting. congenial, and
remunerative to the men under his command. The
weather was very much better than on the previous
week's training, and grumbling, modified or in any
sense whatsoever, was conspicuous by its absense.
If there had been one indolent man in the
Company-there is not (maybe)-even he would
certainly have remarked that the training week was
completed under most satisfactory conditions. To
have completed the work of the week early in the
Friday morning was" very snice." It would be
greatly appreciated by the men who had just
finished special training if their work were always
ended on the Friday afternoon, giving them the
Saturday free. Perhaps, however, that would
savour too much of " the gentleman's life, ' and be
inconsistent with military ideals!
Owing to unfavourable weather, football has not
been quite so prominent during the past month.
However, in the platoon games the Company did
quite well. )io. 9 suffered a first defeat through
misfortune as much as anything else. The defence
of this platoon is very good, and among the best in
the Battalion, The other platoons have evidently
a plethora of scoring forwards, as fi ve goals in the
one game is a comparatively common total for them
to run up against less fortunate opponents. The
congratulations of the Company are cordially
extended to No. 6 Platoon on their emphatic success
at Gailes in their first away game.
In the other branches of sport the Company is
still taking a prominent part, more especially in that
strenuous form of exercise-who shall say amusement-tug-of.war.
The C Team have yet to suffer
their first defeat. The Cross-Country Team
suffered as much as any other team in the regrettable
incidents which tended to mar the military
Cross-Country Meeting at Bogside, several of our
most prominent runners taking the wrong turning.
Ifcricket be played in the Battalion-and why not?­
the Company should have a very serviceable eleven.
which would include R. R. Waters, the popular
Glasgow University and Kelburne player.
It is never really desirable to individualise among
the platoons, b'Ut it is in no form of comparison that
the following remark is made. On the Tuesday of

86 THE OUTPOST.
the training week the aitack in the morning did not
develop at all well, being corisidered a fiasco in
official quarters. Thecnarge particularly waS of a
most depressing nature, and would not have
inspired awe in a pair of white mice. In the afternoon,
the attack was repeated over the same gwrrnd,
an{! was really well done. The charge, indeed· the
work from the fire position, was the best yet seen in
the Company, and No. 10 deserve to be mentioned
in despatches, as to them more than to any of the
other platoons of the Company, is praise due in
creating the pleasing situation which prevented our
Company Commander having any comments to
make. Could it not always be done so satisfactorily?
The system of defence was explained at
some considerable length by the Platoon Commander.
The line of trenches was here; the
supports were there ; -~ platoon was on our right,
covering the mound in front; such and such a
company was on our left; at the end of our line
a machine gun (making its presence known by a
nice border of shrubbery ingenuously-no misspelling
I-placed there by a zealous disciple of
Baden Povvell) which would develop an enfilading
fire on any attack on us; these were the obstacles
(God forbid i). All this was being kindly elaborated
upon, and the men of the Platoon were standing as
if transfixed with amazement at the ingenuity of
modern military strategy. It was then that one of
the number--one, by the way, who more than any
other, perhi;tps, would be qualified to tell you when
the Guard is called up, what you may expect in
rounding up a Carlton breakfast, and so on--turned
round, and in a relieved tone of voice, upraising his
eyebrows the while, said" Ach, weH,-it's only in
funny, anyway."
A great cheer rent the air as the Company topped
Dundollald Hill and came within view of the Field
Kitchen. It had been a cold afternoon, and with
outpost work confronting us, hot coffee was much
to be preferred to water, which by this time was
developing a strong"Apenta "flavour. "Jimmy's "
nice ruddy complexion and smiling countenance
betokened a successful venture, and the confidence
replaced in him to see that C Company would get
something tasty was not belied. The coffee was a
great success and very greatly appreciated by the
men. It was undoubtedly the appearance of the
Lune Valley Kitchen which prompted the query of
one enthusiast, " Chips, and have you any peas? "
It is said that very tasty dishes can be prepared with
the aid of this outdoor cooker, and the minds of the
men are wandering to thoughts of roast beef, etc. To
talk more modestly, a pie might not be out of place,
and the punishing of such a " sedative" would be
" some swank," although, perhaps, not conducive
to success in any " assaultine; n work.
D COMPANY.
WE had no rain-merely the after effects. and
that was" some" mud. Company training
made a thrilling week, with incident and experience
in plenty, and the close of each day sent us to " our
resting beds, weary and content." Unfortunately,
the preceding .week's Iain interfered with the
interesting programme arranged, by placing a
numberof areas out of bounds. Sometimes it looked
as if we were to be restricted to the Golf Courses we
know so well. Old Sol relented, however, and
calling out his reserves, opened up a heavy fire with
such effect that the forces of mud were completely
overcome, and by 'Wednesday the programme
originally arranged was taken up. On that day we
journeyed to a far, far distant land-by name New
Field-which lies over the Hill of Dundonald, and
there, under the eagle eye of the Brigadier, attacked
the hidden enemy with such vigour and dash as to
be completely victorious. \Ve flung their corpses
into the bum and composed ourselves--as comfortably
as mud and moisture would permit-for lunch.
The remainder of the day (and night) was spent in
marching home and dry-cleaning our" good blues"
with a pen knife.
On Monday we paraded at the Drill Hall and
were the recipients of a large and varied assortment
of straps and buckles, with a lesser quantity of
canvas bags, etc. This, we were informed, was
our Kit, and an initiation ceremony was arranged at
the Pavilion for the same evening. This is the
second time on record where order has been evolved
from chaos. The third and last time will be when
our planet reverts 'to its primal elements. There
will be a considerable quantity of gas in evi;lence
then, and should certain of our worthy ~'I.C.O_s be
present, they will experience some difficulty in
keeping their end up_
On \Vednesday operations were carried on
between the Relief Course and Sandhills, and a
piquancy was added to the attack by the activity
of the enemey's cavalry, which thundered down
upon us at great speed at unexpected moments.
The snorting of the leading charger, however,
usually gave the game away and enabled our brave
men to so act as to make its capture at Troon
Station a certainty. A machine gun, the product
of Lieut. M'Roberts' fertile imagination, producing
volumes of smoke and a trifle less rattle, stimulated
fire-direction and contributed to the interest of the
day's work. The Hon. Captain Drummond carefully
criticised the work done and said-but there,
we will refrain from repeating his remarks and 80
spare the feelings of our less gifted brethren in the
Aerated Bread Companies.
On Thursday we tripped with light hearts and
heavy haversacks to Ploughland-the abode of a
treacherous burn that took some of us in-and there
" initiated. continued and completed an attack with
ail possible vigour" (for further examples see
Haking, or remain awake while he is being read).
The Brigade Major, Captain Wood, was present
throughout operations and afterwards delivered a
highly interesting and instructive lecture to the
N,C.O.s. Friday saw us on the Gailes Golf Course
under ideal weather conditions and many voted it
the best day of the week.
" "VeIl done, D, third place!" We never heard
you fancied for the Bogside Cross-Country event,
and therefore our congratulations are the heartier.
Our advice to you is: "Run, run, run and go faster
and faster and faster, and then walk awav with the
event!" Our sympathies are extended to those of
the Battalion who missed the course, and especially
to Private Bruce of 15 Platoon who has consistently

THE OUTPOST. 87
proved himself a runner of merit, and deserved a
hetter fate than disqualification.
They were disCllssing the merits of .. soccer "
players in a cer',Lin platoon, with a view to a
sh'onger team. The name of him who off,ciates at
the ta rtan-covered table in the absence of the
C.-Q.-M.-S. was mentioned, and on the subject of
inclusion, the question was" to be, or not to be."
The majority favoured " to be." The Sergeant
said, .. No! The experiment would be too costly! "
The majority lifted their eyebro ws and said,
"'Explain." "You sce," explained the jovial
Sergeant, "he would want a ha'penny for every
pass h e gave ! "­ The matter was dropped ..
Vie are pleased to welcome a new contributor
from No. 15 Platoon. Further efforts are respectfully
solicited- in lieu of copy send cash--do not,
however, emulate the unblushing aspirant who
carefully copied out and haneled us that interesti ng
tit-bit of war nC' ws regarding the capture of Cascara.
During the intervals between sleep we are usually
awake.
E COMPANY.
ABOUT the end of March the principallopic o(
conversation throughou t the Company \\'a.;;­
KHAKI, and for some time, drill, sports, and the
da.ily routine of ollr exis tence wcre all banished
from our minds by the magic word and its attendan t
poss ibilities.
The majori ty are incl ineel to view the khaki
as an in l

88 THE OUTPOST:
Sub-Editorial.
As far as we have gone, it would appea(that
the circulation of The Outpost is
Our tending to increase each month by
Circulation. about a thousand copies. When
we have reason to order from the
printers an edition of ten thousand, then we'll
enter into active competition with the popular
Magazines, and do as Peter Pan did-crow.
According to reports sent in from the Finance
department, more than four thousand copies of
our ::Vlarch issue have been taken up, and we are
pleased also to have the. comforting assurance
that not only is this the result of the Battalion's
esprit de corps, but the effect of our being
blessed in the ranks with so much merit that
appeals to minds outside the I7th H.L.I. By
and bye, if our growing circulation warrants
the expenditure, the Editorial staff may
include a fine coloured plate, from paintings
done by our own artlst boys, in certain issues.
We have exchanged Magazines with other
battalions and squadrons, and we hope that
Editors of such, should this catch their eyes, be
good enough to forward us their productions
for our mutual benefit. Lest some are not
aware of it, all proceeds from the sale of the
Magazine are devOted to the improvement of
the ensuing issue. We do not see, at the
moment, anything to prevent our journal's
being the absolute "limit" of its kind. To
achieve this rests solely with the members of
each Company, A to E,'so put your best efforts
at the disposal of the staff. In some quarters
it was suggested that gifted outsiders were
doing the best work for us: absolute rubbish!
Everything in the Magazine is, and has been,
the production of members of the H.L.I., and
from things seen and heard we know that we
have not tapped half the genius of our smart
set. We are gratified at the continued notices
of approval which have appeared in the Press.
Such give our· contributors faith' in their
prowess, and that is a more valuable stimulus
to constant exertion than any honeyed praise
that might emanate from the interested
sanctum of the Editorial staff.
Pro tanto quid
retribuamus.
* * * * *
The difficulty of pleasing everybody was
appreciated long before The
Outpost came into being. Some
Pleasing desire an entirely humorous pro­
Everybody. duction, others a sort of shandygaff,
and various resthetes ask for
something with a decided literary flavour.
How, in this world of graded tastes and
temperaments, can we achieve the seemingly
impcssible result of satisfying each one when
the Great Infinite has not succeeded! In this
you all can help; if you wish tQ see eertain
shades of intellectual entertainment in these
pages, why, sit down and embody it on paper.
Frankly, we cannot promise an'ything more than
a splendid· olIapodrida, and this, we believe, is
what Nature is herseif-

---------.-----.~---- -----_.
THE OUTPOST.
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No. 4. MAY. 1915.
_._-_._--­
IT is the hour when weary nature seeks repose;
Thomas Atkins is standing at the gate
embracing his lady for the last time, while on
her shoulder he posts a wary eye for the
Orderly Corporal; the bar-tenders are
endeavouring to persuade sceptical customers
(mostly civilians) that another day will dawn
and their thirst remain; landladies are turning
the gas off at the meter; a chill wind moans
up channel, and with it comes the rain.
It is ten 0'clock.
Let us leave these gay scenes and pick our
way carefully towards the shore, avoiding
amorous couples who turn to stare at our
approach.
In the dark we gradually become aware of a
Company formed up on parade. It is silent
and menacing. One feels instinctively that
these men mean business. But for an occasional
hoarse whisper as a sergeant lovingly shows
someone how to form fours, and the dull gleam
of a lantern, it might be a phantom army.
Turn away for a moment, and la! when you
look again they are gone. At an almost
imperceptible sign from the Commander they
moved off silently and with alacrity on their
night manreuvres: .
Sleep on, little town, nor let Zeppelins or
submarines distnrb your dreams; Company
are awake!
Night M anreuvres.
BY A PRIVATE.
What, then, are' Night Manreuvres ? '
Ask your sergeant, and he will purse his lips
and look wise. (All sergeants look wise; that's
why they are chosen. I, cursed with a laughing
face never can be anything but a private.
Not for me the raptures of the Sergeants' Mess
or the round-eyed look of awe on my lady's
face.)
Ask your Platoon Commander-and you'll
be lucky if the result is no worse than an hour'S
extra drill.
I am, therefore, in the unfortunate position
of having put in a week of night manreuvres
with but the vaguest notion of what it was all
about. True, I approached my Section
Commander on the subject one night as we lay
on the hillside, but his annoyance at being
wakened rendered his views of little valne.
So far as I was able to make out, each platoon
marches by compass on a certain rendezvous,
the whereabouts of which its Commander is
perfectly familiar. Should the compass fail
to locate the desired spot, its owner reprovingly
returns it to its case. Freed from this incubus
he then marches straight for his object. Or he
may elect to follow his nose, which, unless the
treacherous instrument has led him too far
astray, should by this time readily detect the
aroma of coffee. Coffee, I should explain, is
brought out for us in a' cooker: and is the only

90 THE OUTPOST.
tangible result of our labours, though why we
cannot be allowed to consume it decently and in
order in onr respective billets is a thing no
fellah can understand.
There is a sweet little anecdote in this
connection. Just as dawn was breaking one
morning, a certain major (ears cocked) turned
to his sergeant and asked him if he didn't hear
the cuckoo. The sergeant, whose thoughts had
been lovingly on the' cooker' all night, sa.id,
. No, but I can see its lights.'
The remainder of the night is spent in
climbing to a hilltop and falling on our faces on
the wet grass. \Ve lie in that position until
sunrise, when those who are awake and have not
contracted rheumatism get up, rush forward a
hundred yards, and fall prostrate again. This
game is continued until the Major feels ready
for breakfast, and the men for a quiet life. It
is probably some form of sun-worship, and I
would respectfully call our Chaplain's attention
to it. Personally, I am of the opinion that it
should be nipped in the bud lest it spread like a
disease throughout the Battalion.
After scouring the hills for the platoons whose
Commanders have manfully stuck to their
compasses, we form up and march home, happy
in the knowledge that the whole day is ours to
do with what we will-except, of course, for an
hour or two in the forenoon and afternoon when
we go on parade.
Night manccuvres, by the way, have had the
unlooked for effect of rousing in the N.C.O.s a
sudden enthusiasm for driving, and they have
many little excursions over the hills on sunny
afternoons when we rankers are boring ourselves
to death in bed. .Needless to say, compasses
are not used on these occasions a

THE
OUTPOST.
91
Why Did I Join the Army?
NoT so very long ago, but long enough to
ena ble me to ;~pp r ec i ate thc puint of a
li ttle . Lury b tiN t ha n ever- l'll t ell you L11a t
Dlory later-I, imbll'd with t he id ea of " doing
m y uit, " decided t o takc the King's shilling
(bythc w ay, 1 nev r :;", the hard cash), a nd on
a really deli ' htful S, turday afternoon I found
m yself in Troon. The ni k na mes given t o the
3nl G lasgow aJ:lJ?cu led to me-" God's Ow n,"
.. 1'h.e F eather Bccis," et c., but " V\ l hal';; in a
name ? " \,... ;WOll forcib ly hrou ht home to lII e,
and if ther ' a re .1IIY other poor, misgll ici cd 501l ls
thinking of joining Lhem beca u e of the c
so-caJled 11l111l0rOUS tit! 'S , lel thelll cons id er the
following as a t ypical week 's work :­
J1ondal'- l{o Ll te Ma rch tc " ·owhere."
Di:;iance, ahout 18 miles.
Tuesday - Trench fi lling near Barass ie.
Total m a rch, cluont 1 2 miles, carrYin g
either a p ick or shoye l. ]'/(I!c. Tr"n 'h
fi lling lS som cwork, bnt, heingenthusi:l!:>ls
wc a lled it ,·po rt. In a Ma gazine like
th i~ we da ren 't say what wc called it
n ext day.
TVcri llesday --':Squacl Drill in the Polo Ground
during the forenoon. Afternoon- 6
miles cross-country run, L1le lailer being
m ost enjoyable, especially if you were
never ill i.h ' habi l of running morc tlla n
50 'ards after a tram. I
lhltJ'sday- H.oul.e March to" Nowhere 1'\0. H ."
S urrounding scenery much t he same as
lVlond a r's m arch; dis ta nce a lso simi lar.
Friday- More Squad Drill, Fa (so-called) in
t he afternoon ; lll Cln CC ll v res al. night.
Saturday--S till more Squad Drill.
SlI1Hlay-The d i1.Y ot r ·t, ,md per>:;llnally
havn 'L III ,toan" in the ba tta lion d csirOll s
u C the Co ntill ~ llt a J S Ullday . Onc II 'eels
l.he rcst.
Of coursc 1 had quite a number o f little t hings
lo go through iJeJore ucing a ll owed to take par t
in a Ll th,LL work. The Yer y first of tbc:;c was l.o
get m y uillel fixt.:cl up. H:tving intcrviewed [he
lns pcctor 01 Po li ce, T was sen t io :1 lad~; who
tllrned oul lu be, as I Jall 'v s he'cl d "scribc
herself, " ;\ warmer," and 1 ha-cl t he llli ~ (o rtun e
In ruffl e h 'r tempcr a lmos t immediate!, by
asking i1 tll r ' was a b,IUl ill her house. or the
nicknamcs I hadn't hea rd, ., The Bath-room
BllOyS " \\'.lS on c, lOb " fo re\\'.ll'ned would have
been forearmed. ~-r y qll e~li on cli cited the
cheering infurmation : " W c'r j ust guicJ
\\·orking-c1. -s folk, a nd y needna com e hcrc
~e e kin' ony 0' yer philmag' rie , fllr ye'JI no' get
t hem." Evid nUy a. bath was a phi l--huw
do you sp II tha1- ?, a nd J \\'as sum e sur of
specia l anima l for d esiri ng on. Il owever.
d iplomacy \\'on the L1 a ~ r. the landlady's t e mper
\\·ct.' soon soothed anr! she ad mitted herself
tha.L she was a bit nippy . Laler on 1 used
to deri ve Cl cerl

02 THE OUTPOST.
A young man died a nd naturally mad e
H ea ven his d estination, but on his arrival there
he was kept oubide II'ha t t ime enquiri e_' w ere
m 'lde r egarding him . H had given his name
as John Ca m erun from 1'ro011, and he was
certainly dumbfounded wh.en h e was ultimately
t old that he h ad n evcr been heard of. UncleI'
the circumstances there was nothing left for
him but to tum his st eps towards lhe regions
governed by His ~atanic Majesty, where he w' s
abo refused ad mission.
Poor John! A H h e turned aW Lly tears rose
int o his cyes, "d1cn another m a n going toward .;
the gat e, I' .cogniS8d him, anc! shoutecl, " Hullo,
Jock! \\That's wrong with you?" Jock
tolc! his story! "1 went up to Heaven," he
said, "but they wouldn't l · t 111e in, so I came
down here, but they lIon't le t me in either."
" \Vell," :;,Lid the other, " whilt havc you got to
cry about ? " a nd, \\'i Lh a break in 11 is voice,
J ock replied, "I-I-I'Jl n-n eecl to go back to
Troon! "
However, being in tl1C A rm ' has i b COlllpensations.
"Vc do get eel up, a nd II'e
h;w to work, but it h as its humours and,
perh ps , the greatest of the, .., is saluting twice
for seven shillings. Y et it seems easy to keep
onc's expenditure within s llch a princely SIIIlI,
but this is how oneof my early week's

THE OUTPOST. 93
THE past month has been crowded with incident
for all ranks of the Battalion. The Special
Training Companies have carried on the work each
week on the training areas under the careful
supervision of the Brigade and their own Officers,
and steady progress is being made. A prominent
feature of this month's training has been the
practice obtained in handling of ammunition
supplies. The Transport Section have followed the
Training Companies with wagons containing
supplies of practice ammunition, and the Company
pack horses have accompanied their Companies in
the field. This exercise is one of the most important
parts of training and therefore is of the greatest
value to the Battalion.
During the month, on some waste ground off
Bentinck Drive, some of the Companies of the
Battalion constructed a system of trenches on plans
from the front published by the \Var Office. These
have proved of exceptional value, not only to this
Battalion, but to the Brigade.
Towards the middle of the month the four Training
Companies commenced a course of instruction and
practice in night operations. The use of the
compass, reconnaissance of positions by day for use
at night, and the siteing of trenches have been
practised. The men of the Battalion have been
taught the use of silence, the value of the shock of
an attack in the grey. raw minutes of early dawn,
when the spirits ofthe enemy are at theidowestebb,
and the importance of accurate measurement of
time and space. The field cookers have accom·
panied the Companies on night work, and hot coffee
has proved a great boon to all ranks.
The 27th of this month is marked with a white
stone for the Battalion, for on this day the Lord
Provost of Glasgow and the Directors of the Glasgow
Chamber of Commerce visited Troon. and with the
Brigadier inspected the Battalion. The march.past
was carried out in fine style and the Lord Provost
complimented the Officers, ~.C.O.s and men on their
appearance and work. The Directors expressed
themselves as delighted with the progress of the
Battalion they had been instrumental in raising.
The letters published later in Orders bore witness
to their appreciation and should inspire each
member of the Battalion with pride in his Regiment.
The Signallers have from the first made very
satisfactory progress, and have now been having
field days, during which a message travels over
twenty miles from start to finish. The efficiency
of this section is very gratifying, and the appointment
of Lieut. Paterson as Signalling Officer is a
mark that this section is now in full working order.
During the month Lieut. Kitchin has left the
Battalion to take up a Commission in the Royal
Marines. \Ve take this opportunity of congratu.
lating him on his success in obtaining first place
in the qualifying examination and wishing him luck
in his fu ture career.
This month, alas, has also seen another well
known Officer leave to join another unit. Captain
Kilpatrick, our most popular Doctor, having becn
recalled to the Territorial Forces. This is a sad loss
to the Battalion, and all ranks will join in regret at
his departure and in wishing him God-speed in his
fu ture labours.
The following Officers and N.C.O.s have been
undergoing courses of instruction during the month:
Capt. Keilson, Machine Gun Course at Strensall.
Lieut. :V[orton, Course of Musketry at Chelsea.
Lieut. Begg, Course in Physical Training at
Aldershot.
Sergt. Mather, Course of Cookery at Aldershot.
Sergt. Hamilton, Course of Instruction at Chelsea.
Each Company has been undergoing during the
month a special course of Physical Training under
Sergt. Shuttle and tent pitching under the Company
Staff.
During the latter days of last month L..Corpl.
Morrison of the Royal Engineers was attachel to
this Battalion to instruct the men in the con·
struction of obstacles and bombs an j their uses.
VerY momentous news has been received since
these notes were commenced. The Battalion is to
proceed to Prees Heath, in Shropshire, on the 13th
May. This is, inieed, a step in the right direction,
and is a cause for self congratuL!tion by all ranks,
as we are told it is promotion.
However, our gratification at the move is
tempered by a good deal of regret at leaving the
II7th Brigade. Brigadier.General F. Hackett·
Thompson and Capt. H. L. \Vood have always made
our work interesting, and while making themselves
popular with all ranks, have not stinted praise or
blame where it was likely to prove beneficial, and
all ranks will be exceeding sorry that orders compel
them to say good.bye !
\Ve have another cause for deep regret. E
Company is not to go with us to Prees; but is to
form a depot under lVlajor W. Auld at Gai~es. This
is a sad business, as we shall leave behmd many
popular Officers, N.C.O.s and men. However, we
must hope that the parting is to be brief. and that
E Company will soon follow and accompany us to
France. our goal.
T. P. L.

04 THE OUTPOST.
Nocturne-Night Work.
THE hour of ten is ushered in
S .. M.'s shou t of " Markers, steady! "
Dropt the fag; the cuss· word sped ;
Once more for night-work we get ready.
Out and away o'er dusty roads
\Ve toil, at spoonful couples staring.
And bv eleven we're on the track
Of an elusive compass bearing.
Th' assembling place is reach,d, and as
In slumber's cupboard we are shelving,
All thought of weary hours to come,
The distant chimes are softly twelving.
'Ere ever Time's long restless hand
The clock's plain face has nearly rounded;
Before the hour of one is nigh
To " Follow me, in fours" we're hounded.
The trenches sited, after two
O'clock with joyful merry ch3.ffing
We hie us to the Kitchen, and
The fragrant coffee soon are quaffing.
Yet back again at three to oc­
Cupy imaginary trenches;
\Vaiting a listless laggard dawn,
The while our knees the dew.drop drenches.
His secret nest the song· lark leaves,
The ebon blackbird does likewisely ;
Their mellow matins heav'nwards rise
At half-past three o'clock precisely.
The half-past three verse does for four.
If five lack one no tear we're shedding.
For 10, 'Us six! \Ve softly sink
To slumber on the springful bedding.
* * * * *
Ye pilgrims of the night, I trow,
Agree nemo dis. that night's no play-time,
And yet (how paradoxical)
Night_work,s a pie-nie-yes, at daytime!
T.
Semaphore.
THE primitive method of army semaphore
signalling, it is said, was not an invention,
nor had it any definite origin, but simply
evolved itself. \Vhen it was first introduced to
the notice of the military authorities, I do not
know-perhaps the authorities themselves don't
know, though judging from the thorough
manner in which these people perform and
record everything, this is scarcely possible.
There is one story of the origin of semaphore
which has an air of probability about it. It is
said that, about a century or two ago, a certain
cave on the south-east coast of England was
tenanted by smugglers. In a field above the
cliffs there stood a scarecrow, and the smugglers'
G.I.C., a man with a stern, rugged face, and a
promising career, hit on the brilliant idea of
using this scarecrow for signalling instructions
to his gang on the boat. Thus, by glancing at
the angle at which the scarecrow's arms were
placed, the desperadoes on board knew at once
whether to land, go back out to sea, or to sink
the boat and swim for it. It chanced, however,
that one evening the crew had used up a keg of
their cargo, and they subsequently saw a
scarecrow with anything between four and
eight arms. In the excitement and confusion
which ensued, they were captured, and their
secret signals became known.
The system then gradually evolved itself
until finally it was adopted by the army. It
was not anything like perfect, and consequently
much trouble was experienced; but the deathblow
to the system was dealt when, on
manoeuvres, the Signallers were posted along a
road to signal the approach of the commanding
officer. The words were sent through. "c.o.
in sight," but owing to the similarity between
the letters n, s, and t, the message. which
unfortunately reached its destination about ten
minutes after the C.O. had arrived, read;
"C.O. is tight." For a period of fifty years
after this unhappy occurrence signalliI'lg was
dropped.
Drawn by TRANSPORT. Pie. Tho",••".

However, a new system was invented, or
rather the old system was improved upon, by a
certain Professor PhJagge, Mus. B., M.D., LL.A.,
in which the letters n, s, and t were made as
widely different as possible, and accordingly the
ne'w method was accepted bythemilitaryexperts.
In the earlier days of Phlagge, before the
elementary difficulties of the system had been
overcome, a signaller's life was full of tyrannical
hardships. He did not enjoy immunity from
the terror of ponderous words-which terror
signallers of the present day never experience.
Take for instance, the case of the commander
who wished to report to the General that:
" Considerable ambiguity exists as to whether
the preliminary reconnaissances" etc., etc,
Three signallers were carried away before the
crack man was sent for. He bravely stuck to
his post until the message was finished, but the
mental strain knocked hIm cock-eyed, and, it is
recorded, he subsequently died of plague. The
signaller who read the message died of a broken
neck through trying to follow the angles.
Happily the modern system, which is the
Phlagge system raised to super-perfection, and
is called Semaphore, holds no difficulties for
anyone, and can be learned in about a week.
S.M.
Drawn iy
Pie. Birr./I.
THE BEST OF FRIENDS MUST PART.
To-Morrow.
WE'VE packed our bloomin' 'aversacks, the
troopship lies in port,
To-morrow sees us on the deep, the time is precious
short.
But to-night we're all off dooty, and we'll 'ave a
right good spree,
And the soldier swells will walk the gels they never
more may see,
To stroll around the town to-night, by Gawd, is
something grand !
Good pals we never met before extend a friendly
'and.
We'll take their paper compliments and drink their
'eal ths in beer;
True soldier boys who fear no noise, and lads who
like good cheer.
It aint so many months ago, I'm thinkin', all the
same,
Since certain good folks gave the boys a rather easy
name,
" Oh, yes! 'e's just a soldier," which words meant
lots 0' blame:
To-night, we're real live 'eroes, with a stainless,
deathless name.
But, devil take me, if I mean to stand a-preach in'
here,
So, matey, come alongwi' me and have a drop 0' beer,
A glass 0' Scotch, a quart 0' ale, don't cause this kid
much pain,
And I must have one more before I walk with Mary
Jane.
Oh! rH tell 'er 'ow I love 'er, vowin' never to forget,
An' w'en I get a chance I'll mash some other
charmin' pet.
Excuse me, mate, for talkin' light, it ain't just
straight I know,
But soldiers get unsettled like, when orders come
to go.
There's Charlie lookin' prouder nor a Chinese
Mandarin,
And sober as the chaplain who condemns the old
canteen. ~
I promised I should fix 'im up, with pretty Mary's
chum,
And if I fail to do it, you can bet 'e'll make things
hum.
Good-bye, old sport, I'm going now, per'aps we'll
meet again,
If wanderin' death don't stop me breath, across the
rollin' main.
I'm seein' rather misty, an' me legs are wobblin' so,
But, soldiers, pals, and gentlemen - Are we
down'earted? No!
SPEAKER.
t t t
Our golfing enthusiasts will be interested in
the advertisement on another page of Mr. David
Adams, Royal Exchange Square, Glasgow. At
this well known centre there is a splendid
selection in stock just now.

96 THE OUTPOST.
VI.
Indeed, to be Teetotal oft before
I swore-but was I sober when I swore?
And then, and then came Pals with Cash in hand,
And good Resolves all into pieces tore.
VII.
Well, strange to tell, among the Thirsty lot
Some could articulate, while others not;
And suddenly one more impatient cried­
" Fetch me a Shandy, please, I'm very hot."
VIII.
Then said another with a long-drawn Sigh
" My Tongue with Field Manceuvres is gone dry;
But, fill me with the old familiar juice,
Methinks I might recover by and bye! "
IX.
And while we Tommies one by one were speaking,
One spied the little Girli all were seeking;
And then we jogg'd each other, " Brother, brother I
Let's toss the Coin and see which Man she's
meeting! "
X.
I've won! The \Vise may wrangle, let them be,
I'll trip by yellow Sands and Moonlit Sea:
And in some corner of the Golf Course coucht
Make Game of that which makes as much of me.
Drawn b,
PI•. Blrrell.
THE OUTPOST has caught on!
Not a dry page! !
Our Rubaiyat.
1.
A WAKE! for Morning takes the place of Night,
The wild Alarm has put our Dreams to Flight;
And lo! the jangling Cups we hear below
Tell of the Morning Coffee-It's all Right!
Xl.
And that delightful Down, whose tender sheen
Fledges the Soldier's lip on which She'll lean­
Ah! lean upon it lightly, for who knows
What Kelly'd say, if it could not be seen!
AUDAx.
H.
And, as the Cock crows, those who stand before
The Bathroom shout out-" Open then the Door!
You know how little time we have to dress,
And if we're late we get C.B. once more."
Ill.
\Ve Men no question make of Ayes and Noes,
But follow il!st where our Commander goes;
The General who sees us in the Field,
He knows about it all-He knows-HE knows!
IV.
After parade, Pavilion they freguent­
Corp'ral to Major-and hold argument
About it and about: but evermore
Come out about as wise as in they went.
V.
Listen again. One evening at the Close
Of our Day's \Vork, before the Moon arose,
I went into the South Beach Bar to get
Of Medicine my ante·prandial Doze.
Drawn by
1'1•. Wa/s.n.
" Did you not get your hair cut yesterday l' "
" Yes: out my Platoon Commander didn't
think so; you'd better take it ALL off! "

THE OUTPOST.
Should you see thrC'c worried-looking nwmiJers
of the Battalion 1Il tuwn on the Jirti ( F riday and
Saturday of each month, g ive L1lem grea t sympa.thy
-they a re the ed itorial staff pushing the Maga zine
through a.t the prin ler". ~
"
Cwnpo Santo isn 't L atin fu r the Ciw 'I , oC U",
Sainlly Third: il means ' d CC l''' Sl' d ' g rnuuri, nnd
o ur camp will be anything but ckal1.
If lh bllOYs continue tu ' pra.in their

98 THE OUTPOST,
EDITORI~L.
PREES.
MAY, 1915.
It's the humour we find in this life that makes it beantble.-Private T. A., Royal Scots.
We must thrash this out.-Countess BARCYNSKA.
LIFE in the army would be fairly tediolls if
it were not for the various little things in
it that serve to brighten it up and break the
monotony of training. Military routine and
manmuvres are all very interesting. but it is
only when we appreciate and make the most of
the humour in them, that we prevent ourselves
from getting 'fed-up.' There is, curiously
enough, a sameness about our life which is due
not to lack of variety, but to the long continued
stay in one place and the regularity of the
changes offered by the various branches of our
trammg. Our days are not'all the same, but
the feeling of monotony is there, and the spirit
of it is well expressed in one of our choruses, to
a hymn tune,
Marching, marching, marching.
Always jolly-well marching.
If we are not marching, we arc 'jolly-well'
doing something else, and thus the sameness
gets hold of us. Our life is more or less
uneventful, and naturally this reflects itself on
the pages of our Magazine.
The Outpost must of necessity take a somewhat
similar complexion to that of the life led
by its producers. There is a certain amount of
similarity running through the successive issues.
\Vhat we try to do is to make the most of any
jokes or novelties that do arise; we try, as far
as possible, to collect and dispense as much as
we can of the lighter side of army life. Of
course, our Magazine m ust be something more
than an agency for the production of promiscuous
merriment to the Battalion, but it
can never be a newspaper in the sense that
some would like it to be. \Ve report on things
that are past, both in the realms of work and
sport, and we may even go so far as to announce
prospective changes in either case, but we can
never hope to give information of the kind
desired by some. The Outpost is a literary and
artistic venture rather than a news agency, and
the work published is in the nature of original
compositions, rather than news. vVe are not
in Cl position to pay any of our contributors for
their work, and so it is a case of Art for i\rt's
sake. The contributions are not always of a
humorous nature, for we aim at edification as
well as entertainment. A contribution or two
of a more serious type gives relish to the dishstrength
to the structure.
One saving grace of the present condition of
our existence is that we do not descend to
personalities to obtain the humour of which our
friend of the Royal Scots spoke. \Ve are saved
from entertaining ourselves at the expense of
others by the fact that we are now all working
together in one great cause. In the army
" we're a' Jock Tamson's bairns." as a popular
Q.-~f.-S. often says. and under a superficial
irritation, which comes sometimes to the best
of us, lies a spirit of Comradeship and Patriotism
which rises above the petty squabbles so often
met with in Civil Life. It is on these lines that
The Outpost is run, and we hope that we are
always sensitive enough of the feelings of others
to refrain from printing anything that might
offend the most susceptible.

THE OUTPOST. ,99
THE EMPTY LIMBER.
I
Drawn by
[It is monstrous to come home and find that munitions of war that would saye the lives of our boys at the Front
are not sent out to them in the quantities that they ought to be sent out. , , . It makes one's blood
boil to find disputes about a halfpenny an hou".-THE BISHOP OF LONDON.]
WHOSE FAULT?

100 THE OUTPOST.
Unto the Hills.
HE was only a shepherd lad. So might a
townsman have spoken of him.
But Jock was born in the shadow of the hills.
His mother's cottage stood by the burnside at
their foot, and from childhood he was versed in
their ways.
He knew them in their sullen winter moods,
when the mists crept down from their tops to the
glens below. and when the cold winds swept
them and filled their every crack and crann\'
with snow. He had watched their dull winter
colourings change to the brightness of spring.
He had seen these colours grow richer and
warmer until, with the purple of the autumn
heather, they attained their greatest glorv. He
knew of things that no townsman ever learns.
When he was old enough for a man's work,
what more natural than that he should take to
shepherding on the hills he knew and loved so
well.
And then came war.
Jock was among the first in the countryside
to follow the drum. He told his mother on the
day he left her that he would return in the spring
when the bracken showed green and the first
lambs of the year were born •..
So autumn and winter passed and with the
spring, as he had promised, came Jock. But
he was blind. An enemy shell had darkened
these keen shepherd's eyes of his for ever.
As you pass, you may see him seated at the
cottage door-step. The spring breezes rustle
through the birches.
On the moor the peesweep's call is heard.
From far up the hillside comes the bleating of
sheep calling to their lambs. Jock sits there.
listening to catch every sound of awakened
nature, his sightless eyes lifted to the everlasting
Wlli. ~
Duggie's Stripe.
HIS nose is cockit in the air,
He greets you wi' a vacant stare
An' richt fu' weel the man can swear' '
In gey clear type
'
The reason, if ye're no' aware,
Is Duggie's stripe.
His heid is swellin', yin can see,
He throws his weight aboot wi' glee,
And in his bonnet there's a bee
That needs a swipe;
The cause 0' a' this jamboree
Is Duggie's stripe,
He used to be a cheery lad,
Ane 0' the best oor company had,
But noo, because he has a squad,
He's changed his pipe;
I sometimes think 'twill drive him mad,
Poor Duggie's stripe.
He bawls and struts aboot the place,
Ye maunna stoop to tie your lace,
Ye canna even dieht your face
Or gie't a wipe,
For if ye did it wid disgrace,
001' Duggie's stripe.
Tho' Duggie's strict he's yet sincere,
While we ha'e him we'll ha'e nae fear
0' our squad gettin' out 0' gear
When foemen snipe;
Wi' richt guid will we'll gie a cheer
For Duggie's stripe.
When at the Front, and ready baith
Tae ficht for honour an' oor faith,
Wi' bayonets fixed an' gaspin' braith,
An' hefty swipe,
We'll follow aye, e'en to the daith,
Oor Duggie's stripe.
J. B. (GAILES).
'
EVOLUTION.
Pt., Thomlon,

THE OUTPOST.
101
My DEAR LITTLE CHICKS,
Some of you will soon be old enough
to get commIssIons III Lord Kitchener's Armv
so this month I am going to give you a few lit{l~
hints on the work you will have'to do.
.You will have command of a platoon right off.
FIrst of all must make them fall in in two
ranks, and you will take a good look at the
men. And they will look very funny-they
usually do. But there will very likelv be one
p:trtlcularly funny-looking man and 'you will
have to make him stand behind the' platoon
where no one can see him. He is called the
Platoon
and whenever yOU are in
doubt as to drill you should ask the Platoon
Sergeant and he will tell you wrong.
Then you will be sure to notice three or four
men who are clumsy and slow or who break the
regular appearance of the ranks. You can put
one at each end of the front rank and then put
two together in the middle where they are just
behind you and where you can keep watch on
them. These are called the section commanders.
Their duty is to
back-chat with the
men in the ranks.
Finally. there will be one or two nasty men
and one or two who know too much. Give them
each a stripe to their mouths shut.
The men who are are called the rank and
file and they do the work.
You can now start drill. The most important
piece of drill is called" counting the rifles" and
is very complicated. Leave it to the Platoon
SergeaJ.lt. Suppose there are four sections of
twelve men each with a rifle, how many rifles
are there altogether? Forty-eight? No. You
are wrong. There are forty-nine, but the
Platoon Sergeant always forgets to count his
own rifle. This makes the operation very
intricate, and by the time the count is corrected
it is too late for the men on week-end pass to
catch their train.
Of course you don't do this drill with real
rifles. The real rifles won't come for manv
moons yet, and you do the drill with ancient
rusty pieces of prehistoric pipe.
Then you have to the oil bottles and
pull-throughs, and the section commanders will
do this. How is it done? Well! think
of a number, double it, multiply it by date
and wnte down an altogether different answer
on a piece of paper which they hand to the
Platoon Sergeant who promptly loses it. This
will not matter as you will have forgotten all
about the oil bottles and pull·throughs by that
tIme.
Two other important points to note. See
that your men all shave--it doesn't matter
whether they wash their faces or get no breakfast.
But they must shave.
Also on route marches see that no paper or
crust or orange peel is left lying on the road at
the halts. Rifles or water bottles and so on
be left, but don't leave any paper.
other morning I had such a surprise.
When I went down to the parade ground I saw
the battalion all in khaki and I thought for a
moment that they had all got commissions.
Wasn't it stupid of me? 'When I got closer I
saw they weren't wearing khaki at all but all
sorts of funny colours instead. And the big
men were wearing the uniforms of the little mon,
and the little men were wearing big uniforms,
I wonder who arranged it all. It was such a
funny idea.
I am afraid the men of the battalion are
growing very wild and reckless. A little bird
whispered to me that one night in the Picture
House they were nearly as noisy as they usually
are in Church on Sunday. Oh! ves. It's very
sad indeed. ' . .
And now I must close. Next month I hOPe
to deal with some of the letters I have received
from m y little friends.
Your loving
All's Well.
t t t
UNCLE JAMES.
In the pocket of 0 soldier, killed In o,ti." durin, the tr".n·
War, was found an • o/ficlal' postcard, addressed IQ hi. su:eel·
hearl. All senle"ce. therein had bee" obllteraled 'ICC.bt the bhrase
, I am quite well!' '
I HAVE a letter from my love,
Across the sea from France it came;
My boy-see, there he signed his name,
An,d there the printing shows above-
Ah look! what blessed news these four
words tell,
See how his message reads; • I am quite
well.'
What though the stain that blots the page
Came from his life.blood, ebbing fast,
He is not dead-his soul bas passed
Beyond-and waits; a heritage
Is bis. 'Tis simple truth the four words
tell,
See bow his message reads-' I am quite
well.'
A. K.

102 THE OUTPOST.
Press Features.
HAVE you ever noticed that the various
journals that obtrude themselves on our
peaceful lives have all, what might be called,
their notable feature. In looking over such
notable features of our more prominent
weeklies I have come to the conclusIOn that if
we are to judge the Press of to-day by such
articles-well, God save the King!
Let us look at some of these examples, and
take first of all that journal of the Home which
you so surreptitiously produce in a crowded
railway compartment and back with an Hvening
News to hide the title-" THE LONDON
NAIL"
THINGS WE WANT TO KNOW.
If it be the case that a certain young lady of
fair hair and five guinea hose, in making her
exit from a certain notorious gambling house in
Tarbolton, collided with 2 III which a famous
Marquis-who, by the way, keeps pigeonswas
carrying in his trouser pocket, and if the
noble Lord threatened to inform recalcitrant's
ma-a lady weH-known in Belgravia for taking
her meals out of a mess-tin-and if he was not
forthwith presenterl with a bss; and if it is
spotted fever or concussion of the brain that is
causing his medical adviser so much anxiety
just now?
What a certain pretty little housemaid of
twenty-one summers could tell us in connection
with a recent Brigade injunction, issued to
certain battalions of our new Army, prohibiting,
nnder sentence of death, the waving to lady
friends in the street or at windows while the
men are marching at ease. And if it is quite
fair for the distingu'shed officer to get his own
back in th's manner.
And now let us turn to that philanthropic
institution known as "AN(D)SWE(A)RS,"
which offers prizes amounting to £1,500 in
certain competitions, receiving as entry money
any paltry sum around {25,000. The strong
feature here seems to be :
DO YOU KNOW THAT
If the nails in the boots of all the men fighting
on the Continent of Europe just now were
placed side by side they would extend from
Petrograd to Vladivostock (touching Prznzph
en route), across the floor of the Pacific, through
the Panama Canal and fourteen feet bevonda
matter of approximately 40,876,237 yards.
That if all the serviceable rWes supplied to
the 17th (Barnardoes) Battn. H.L.I. were
placed muzzle to butt they would extend from
the entrance to the Unionist Rooms, Troon, to a
poin t 7 feet 6 inches beyond that place.
And now let us have a change and take up
that stirring exhibition of powerful, penetrating
journahsm-" THE PEOPLE'S SPEND," and
take as its feature the "Home Hints" by
Eleanor.
SOMETHING FOR TOMMY.
Procure from your grocer a good ham bone.
Allow the dog to spend a P.S.A. with it, then
boil in a mixture of any odd thing lying about.
Take out and enclose in a paste of the following
ingredients :­
! lb. mustard (ohta.inahle from any billet
in Troon).
2. oz. Cream of Tartar (this may be got from
Sergt.-Major KeUy, Sergeants' 2Vtess,
Troon).
2 ~ Breakfastcupsfull of Self-Raising Flour
(which can be easily obtained from any
RC.O. in Kitchener's Army).
The whole should be allowed to cook in a
moderate oven for IO days or so, after which it
should be " pulled through" and forwarded to
one of our dear Tommies. It will be greatly
appreciated, if not as a delicacy, then as a
Hand Grenade.
It is my intention to put forward only one
other exampie and that is the "SUNDAY
WEEKLY MALE" (which comes up to see the
daughter then). Undoubtedly the feature here
is the illuminating, lucid and specially contributed
articles on the war by " Ally Sloper."
THE GREAT WAR.
The fall of Pourri-les-porrige has resulted, as
anticipated in my notes of last week, in its
occupation by the Allies. The booty taken is
considerable, and, I hear, is likely to include
men and material. It is possible a machinegun,
or even guns, may also be included because.
as I hinted here in the early days of the war, it
is customary for the infantry regiments to carry
such guns.
On the Russian front the tenth Army continues
to make progress. more particularly on
the now famIliar line-Rookinglenn-Prz,
]amnsundamn. Their idea, I take it, is to
drive back the German forces opposed to them,
and in this they should be successful, always
providing. of course, they are superior in
artillery and men and munitions. On ·the
southe~ front Von Bleeryi has managed to
divert attention to the Bukowina and as a
result the Russians are looking in that direction.
In the Dardanelles nothing of im.portance
has occurred in the past week, and it is not
likely that the bombardment will be resumed
until the Council of Admirals, which, I hear
from an unusually reliable source. has been

meeting on i\. French or B ritish w:lrs hip off the
THE TPOST. 103
Forewarned.
entra nce to the Stmits, d e ide it is e. pedlent to
do so, H ad enuff P aslm has resigned, owing , rr is often said that the looker-o n se's mos t of
it is said , to a n a llercatio n a uont a Bill a t the game. It miglIt be add 'cl that
Chipshoppej wiLlI Von d er Zwa nk, generall y he becomes t hcr hy posses,; cl of Cl
There is only c ne other point i\.nd that i ~ that ct e ~ ir e to join in t he fllll , tho llgh t ile opportunit ·
I a m ini:Jrllll'd bl' i\. Mlii La,TI' Attach ' , jnst may ue denied him.
rdurnecl from Ki lia rnev, tha l 'the entrance of Such is my positio n in t hese days of W \ 'hen Tsi Quill much

104 THE OUTPOST.
wrappers she collectit, an' mark ye, he was a
sea-farin' man tae."
" 'Weel, ae nicht when the faimly was a' at
tea, the pictur' fell aft the wa' an' broke in
smithereens on the floor. She's never clappit
eyes on her man from that day to this. If a
broken pictur' means a' that, what can a broken
ring no' mean? "
" Wi' that Mrs. Shairp got kin 0' excitet like,
an' she's been fair dithert a' day. .Noo, a
warnin' is a warnin' is what I say an' I'll bide by
It. If ever Mrs. Shairp sees,"-­
As Mrs .. Emm drew a deep breath preparatory
to resummg, the door of my room creaked
uneasily. Then it began to open slowly, inch
by inch, till the space between it and the doorpost
might have been a foot wide. Through
this modest opening came the head of Mrs.
Emm's youngest.
"'Maw, Shairp's came back safe. He got tae
the Broomielaw twa days syne, but he went on
the spree an' took the wrang caur,-the la..o;;t
ane tae Paisley, an' he's only fund h:8 way back
the day."
The head withdrew. So did ?vfrs. Emm.
From the kitchen came sounds of scolding and
angry remarks regarding manners and the
-respect due to parents.
For the remainder of that evening Mrs. Emm
left me severely alone. Y.
l'HE picquet waits-the soldier's bane­
. To pmch us when our crafty brain
Invents such ruses as would make
Us buy a ticket, and then take
A journey in an ontward train.
When we're in Ayr, and down comes rain
Without a pass, risks must be ta'en, '
Train it-·and for the sinner's sake
The picquet waits.
He nips us time and time again;
Our little dodges are in vain'
The blooming sergeant's wid~ awake,
His sense of duty takes the cake;
Perhaps in hell, to cause more pain,
The picquet waits.
ESQUIRE.
Humour (?) and
Special Training.
WHEN your Company commences Special
Training, the first remark that makes you
smile is when the Major says, " There will be no
parade at 7 a.m. during the week for the
Company." Some say this is the only time you
do get a smile, but I thmk they ought to see a
doctor. There really IS a little dry (and sometimes
wet) humour about it. 'When the" lion
tamer" makes the" lions" sit up, if you don't
actually smIle you can at least " let the facial
muscles relax," as the M.O. said to the recruit
'who was being inoculated.
Whether the commissioned ranks really see
any humour in telling you that, "It wasn't
really necessary, as the enemy's fire was
masked," after vou have doubled three or four
hundred yards, -I don't really know, still when
one of the gentlemen steps up to the ankle in
lovely rich Dundonald mud and says, "Desh
it ! " you " laugh and the platoon laughs with
you" (with apologies to Ella). From the
landlady's point of view, however, I doubt if
there is really any humour in it, unless it be
when we say, "Sandwiches to-morrow, mamma,"
and she imagines our faces when we try guessing
what this" horrible looking mixture" is.
The only point of view that we have to
consider now 1S that of the N.C.O., but has this
person any sense of humour? When one N .C.O.
asked a humble, if rotund private, what a " fine
sight" was, a..nd he replied, " A double helping
of meat on the one plate," why did the XC.O.
angnly tell him that he had better resign or
apply for a commission?
Who was the man from E Company enthusiastic
enough to take the packets of weights
along with his equipment when he was
re-transferred to hIS old Company? vVhat
were his remarks after the first mile or so anent
the "iron ring"? Also, is it true that the
scouts have now learned what a first class
metalled road is, and is there any truth in the
yarn that a certain orderly room has sent a
sarcastic letter to headquarters about laying a
false trail for the cross-country runners?
This
makes one wonder whether the runners really
were cross.
Weighing things up (with the aid of our
scrap-iron) we have come to the conclusion that
there really is a funny side to everything (even
Special Training) if you look at it in the right
way.
F. A.
t t t
For the sake of those who do not know their
geography, Frees is somewhere in England.

THE OUTPOST,
J05
Sergea nt.Major H . C.WE ,
15th (Service) Battalion,
The Highland Ligh L lnfan try,
Scrgcan t·iVlajor 3. T.\ YI.CJI( ,
16th (Service) Batta lion,
The Highland Light Infantry ,
.. "" .. ,
REGIMENTAL SERGEANT.MAJORS,
= 117th INFANTRY BRIGADE. =
, , . (') . , .
'ergean t-:\1ajor J. K ELl.Y,
I 7lh ( 'crvice) B attalion,
1'h Highla nd Lighl In ~lllt ry.
Sergean t·Major J. Bu R HE LL,
15th (Service) Ba ttalion,
The Royal Scols.

106 THE OUTPOST.
The New Musketry Tables.
IT may be safely affirmed that these tests of
marksmanship present no insuperable
difficulty to any man who has earnestly bent
his mind to the instruction he has already
received, and who has attained a fairly good
standard of proficiency in Miniature Shooting
and other preliminary work.
Every soldier must go to the rifle-range with
firm detemlination to do his best, and he must
never lose his confidence and self-reliance. He
should get to know his own rifle, and study its
little ways as to any slight variations, say in
trigger-release, elevation, or side-throw. It
certainly happens very occasionally that a rifle
shoots inaccurately through some faulty fitting
or adjustment of the fore end, bands, barrel,
bolt, or sights, but the chance of a soldier
getting such a fau1ty weapon is very remote
indeed. Every man must, therefore, strive to
acquire confidence in his rifle as in himself.
\Vhen firing he must not get flurried or
excited, but quietly note the result of each
round he fires, and calculate what alteration
may be requisite to ensure an improvement in
his next shot.
On the range, it must always be remembered
that powerful and potentially dangerous
weapons are being used, and every man must
go about his work in a cool and self-possessed
manner, observing every precaution according
to the Range Regulations. The newspapers
often contain notices of the results of silly fooling
with loaded amlS, and it is to be-sincerely hoped
that no accidents of fuis kind will ever stain the
records of the 17th H.L.I.
The study of the changes in ammunition and
the improvements thereby obtained is as
interesting as the study of the development of
the military rifle itself, so a few observations
may not be out of place as to the two patterns
of ammunition that may now be used,-the
Mark VI. and the Mark VII.; and also as to the
effects of fixing the bayonet on the Short
Lee-Enfield rifle.
It is perhaps needless to specify the peculiarities
of the earlier and now obsolete types of
the .303" cartridge, but I might mention the
Mark Ill., with its soft solid lead nose which
caused the bullet to expand on striking animal
tissue, and thus deliver a paralysing knock-out
blow. This bullet was designed twenty years
ago, for use against savage tribes only, by
Captain Bert Clay, at that time on the staff of
the Indian Government Ammunition Factory
at the town of Dum-dum, near Calcutta, and
this is the origin of the curious term" dum·dum
bullet" that we so often hear used to describe
any soft lead or hollow-nosed projectile which
is meant to open out on impact.
The Mark VI. cartridge with its reinforced
base, 30 grains of cordite, and finely proportioned
bullet wifu gently sloping, or, to use
the correct term, hemispheroidal head, was
introduced at the time of the Boer War. It
develops the moderate Chamber-pressure of IS
tons per square inch, and gives improved longrange
target results.
In I908 the quest for a flatter trajectory, with
all its military advantages, led to the development
of the powerful Mark VII. cartridge with
38 grains of tubular cordite, giving 20 tons per
square inch of chamber pressure, and firing a
light sharp-pointed bullet designed on the
model of the " spitz-kogel" of the Germans,
which was introduced by them for the Mauser
in I905.
\Vhen bayonets were fixed on the old-style
rifles such as the Enfield muzzle-loader, the
Snider, the Martini-Henry, and the earlier
models of the Lee-Metford' and Lee-Enfield, a
high aim had to be taken, as the weight of the
bayonet simply held down the muzzle when the
shot was fired.
On the introduction of the Short Lee-Enfield
rifle in I904 it was found that with the Mark VI.
cartridge no alteration in aim was required
when the bayonet was fixed. This curious
behaviour of the rifle fairly puzzled the experts
at the B.S.A. works, at Enfield Lock, and at
Hyi:he, for some time, till instantaneous

--....---....~~--~-
THE OUTPOST.
107
photography came to their aid, and solved the
mystery. Photographs of the bullet in the act
of leaving the muzzle showed that the final
vibration of the 25 inch barrel was downward
or negative when without the bayonet. but
upward or positive when the bayonet was in
place. This "throw-up" exactly counterbalanced
the weight of the bayonet, with the
aforesaid result that no alteration in aim was
necessary.
When the stronger Mark VII. cartridge is
used, this" throw-up" or positive vibration is
all the greater, and therefore a lower aim must
be taken when the bayonet is fixed,-with the
backsight leaf in its lowest position the correct
point of aim is only six inches above the
bottom of the target when firing at 200 yards,
and exactly at the bottom when at 300.
Here, in brief form, is the Course to be fired
by the New Army, Parts 1. and n. being mainly
instructional, and Parts lIT. and IV. being for
the classification of soldiers as Marksmen, Firstclass.
Second-class, or Third-class shots.
One clip or charger is loaded into the magazine
and fired in each practice.
PART 1.
Practice No. 1.-100 yards. 2nd Class Elementary
(Bulls-eye) target. Grouping test.
Lying with rest. Standard required-4
shots in 12 inch circle.
Practice No. 2.-100 yards. Same target.
Application of fire. Lying without rest.
Standard required-5 in 12 inch circle.
Practice No. 3.-200 yards. 2nd Class Figure
target (showing head and shoulders).
Application of fire. Lying-slow. Must
have 5 hits on target, or 12 points.
Practice No. 4.-200 yards. Same target.
Snap-shooting. Exposure of 4 seconds for
each shot. Must have 4 hits on target.
Practice No. 5.-200 yards. Same target.
Rapid fire. Lying, firing over cover.
25 seconds allowed. Minimum required
-10 points.
PART Il.
Practice No. 6.-300 yards. 2nd Class Figure
target. Application of fire. Lying. taking
cover.
Practice No. 7.-300 yards. Same target.
Rapid. Firing over cover. 25 seconds
allowed.
(Note.-The shooting at 200 and 300 yards
is done with bayonet fixed).
Practice No. 8.-400 yards. 1St Class Figure
target. Lying-slow fire.
Practice No. 9.-400 yards. Same target.
Rapid 'fire. Lying. 30 seconds allowed.
Practice No. rO.-500 yards. Same target.
Application of fire. Lying-slow.
Practice No. 11.-600 yards. Same target.
Application of fire. Lying-slow.
PART Ill.
The Classification Practices follow almost
exactly according to Table Bin "Musketry
Regulations."
PART IV.
This portion of the Course refers to the
expenditure of surplus ammunition for repetition
practices and extra instruction of
inferior shots. and will be settled by the General
Officer Commanding each Brigade.
Following all this comes training in Individual
and Collective Field-firing at figure, silhouette,
moving, and disappearing targets, at unknown
ranges.
'When a soldier has successfully completed
the foregoing course of Musketry he may
consider himself well qualified to take an
effective part in his country's battles, so far as
the use of his rifle is concerned.
M. DRt:MMOND, Sergt.
t t t
Ship me away to Egypt's shore,
Somewhere across the foam,
Where I have never been before,
Where snakes and lions roam.
Send me to some outlandish hole.
And, oh! let it be soon;
Teenie has ruffled up my soul,
She's jilted me in Troon.
Drawn by)
[PI•• St.wart.
Landlady: ..Good-bye Mr. Pri1)atf1, and we'll be glad
to see you back agoin in OCTOBER."

108 THE OUTPOST.
tJ.:rI. -15 .
Drawn by Pt•• Hutche .....
She.-" What position do YOU fill in the Battalion-­
Colonel, Captain or what?"
He.-" A B/ank Fi/e."
The Soldiers' Club.
"WHAT we have never had we never miss,"
but that would not warrant one's saying
that the above-mentioned club could have been
done without. Not a bit, as the boys of the
H.L.I. and the Royal Scots would testify. The
good people of the Portland U.F. Church knew
that too, and shewed their thought for the
"blue clad warriors" by generously presenting
them with a large comfortable room in Church
Street to which they could hie themselves, as
circumstances and opportunities permitted. for
the purpose of passing away hours in innocent
amusement and recreation.
The donors must have imagined a serious
dislocation of traffic, due to 1300 men being in
Troon, and seeing that the worry occasioned in
regulating the same might have upset the
calculations of the local police, and caused
unnecessary work for the administrators of the
law, the difficulty was solved in the most
practicable way-the Soldiers' Club was brought
into being. No one would have cared to see
Portland Street governed as are the streets of
most Continental cities and towns. 'Keep to
the right' would have had a distressing effect
on all. and promiscuous friendships would not
have been so easily formed. That would have
been the "most unkindest cut of all."
Imagine having a constable at each end of the
street to keep us right! Fortune stepped in,
and 'God's Own' were saved the ignominy of
such a fate, and the air seemed easier to breathe.
Much might be said about The Soldiers'
Club if time and space would only permit.
Suffice to say that we all look upon the Club as a
boon. which but for the forethought and kindness
of our generollS friends we should most
probably not have had, Let us shew our
appreciation by keeping the ball rolling. and
thanking all most sincerely for the efforts put
forth to make our evenings pleasant.
Just a few words to the ladies and gentlemen
who have given up their evenings for us.
Evening after evening these good ladies present
themselves at the Club to make tea and porridge
for the bhoys.
\Ve have to thank the ladies who take turns
in doing this work. All the food. etc., is
provided by them. How can we thank them
for what they have so freely given? Perhaps
the smiling faces around them will tell much
more than any words of mine. I leave it there.
The social atmosphere created would take
some beating. and we give our heartiest vote of
thanks to "Mr. M'Allister and Mr. Burrows who.
having the interest of the soldier laddies at
heart, are always working and ready with a
cheery word for all-that is their way with us.
\Ve have to thank the Provost, Mr. Muir. and
also Mrs. Muir, for their kindness in lending so
many fine pictures, which have helped to make
the room look so home-like.
All the furniture has been given by members
of the Portland U.F. Church, to whom we are
indebted.
Mr. A. Crichton, who is now officiating in
place of the Rev. G. L. Brander (who enlisted
as private in the Scots Greys at the beginning
of the war, and now holds a commission in the
13th Battalion Royal Scots). has displayed
great interest in the Club.
At present we .have the Club near us, but the
time will come when we shall have to move
away, then we shall remember the nights we
spent at the Soldiers' Club, and the memory
will be a happy one.
A.N.R.

THE OUTPOST.
100
A little of what we think
of them.
FIRST impressions are often the most
accurate, and best, so if you will follow me
back to the time when the Battalion first
entered Troon, fresh from the fields, I shall
endeavour to describe the predominant feelings
of the fair, although somewhat scarce, sex of
our peaceful village when these " Denizens of
glory past imagining" swung into our midst.
In normal winter seasons we have, perhaps,
eight or nine stalwart swains resident in Troon,
so it is not a matter for surprise that the first
thought to strike the village damsels, causing
their little heart's to flutter with mingled throbs
of awe and anticipation, was the immensity of
the Battalion.
Other thoughts chased one another in quick
succession, but the fair ones all agreed that it
was curious that city gents. should have such
a limited knowledge of the most ordinary civic
customs. Imagine the surprise in the eyes of
one little lady when asked on the evening of the
first day if the Troon Post Office sold stamps?
and if the said hamlet were far from Glasgow?
Where was the fellow dragged up ? One of the
, miners,' perchance.
It was quite apparent there had been no
ladies at Gailes, unl€lss perhaps a few Saturday
visitors, for, no sooner had billets been procured
and kit bags dumped down, than there was a
hue and cry for 'fluff,' which word, it was
gathered on- enquiry, is the Glasgow term for
• girl.' No one seems to know the root or
derivation. Introductions seemed quite unnecessary,
and, indeed, prim and prudent little
maids-some of them engaged to gallants far
away-were at a loss to know how to proceed
unmolested to town and back. \Vhen a
Battalion youth beamed sweetly on two ladies
in Ayr Street, one of them stared aghast and
exclaimed, in a tone of disgust, "Ida! gyse
upon it!" It's annoying, you know. But,
then, they are so delightfully charming and
childish with it all, and they do so like to be
loved. It is a pity the amount of ' skirt' is so
limited at the moment, but the summer is
coming, and-and then!
\\-'bile the Battalion impresses us all with its
healthy appearance, which has certainly been
accentuated by Troon, we are indeed sorry that
such a serious throat trouble should have made
its appearance among the bhoys. This seems
most prevalent after dark, after the sermon on
Sundays (accompanied by a sigh) and is not
unheard on the links on Sunday afternoons.
It is a deep clearing of the throat, followed by a
chuckle like that of a most elated hen, and such
expressions as 'All alone?' 'Lonely?' or
'Fine evening: which last is kept for storms
and blinding rain. One brave French scholar
on one occasion remarked to his friend," Une
petite piece de tout droit,"-but we didn't know
what he meant!
Then they are so intelligent. This is most
evident in the general expression on the faces
of the members during Sunday morning service.
Masters of the old art? Of course they are !
Every girl in the hamlet has been told the same
old tale, with variations, and these little fairies
are so innocent and guileless that they
thoroughly believe it all-perhaps I
So long as we have the brave lads, we shall
do what we can for them, but it will not be
until they really leave us that our impressions
of them will seem good and beautiful, and we'll
watch with interest their daring deeds in
danger's hour-that's when they go..
'SOME' GEL.
CIVILIANS try their winning way,
But cannot charm Penelope ;
Though Mistress Grundy has her say,
Pen. still prefers to walk with me.
Beside the restless, rolling sea,
'While dulse and tangled seaweed swirl,
The saintly' Third' is seen, Oui! Oui!
Stravaiging with the Soldier's Girl.
The long-haired, knutty, slacker jay
Discovers he is up a tree,
His glad-eye swank goes all astray,
Maids are not what they used to be.
The H.L.l. come out, and he
Is left alone with wits awhirl
To slink back to his lonely tea-
He can't pick up the Soldier's Girl.
To woo in mufti now.a.day
Is blooming.well feZo de se;
The reasons may be what they may,
They don't deceive Penelope.
True to Ulysses still is she,
His bold heart beats for her-his pearl ;
He joined to fight for liberty,
That's something to the Soldier's Girl.
L'Envoi.
Princess, I hope she'll bide awee
In Troon until I steal a curl;
I hope her Ma will heed my plea-
I'm dotty on the Soldier's Girl. H.

no
THE
OUTPOST.
n..ltn,d by
Pt,. Hutches.n.
MEMORIAL WINDOW
in Troon Parish Church. in Memory of the Saintly Third
Suhscribed by the Parishioners.
•
Troon.
TRO?N is a military suburb of Glasgow,
slt.uated on the coast of Ayrshire, about
3000 mIles from Egypt and a cannon-shot from
Dundonald. The original founders of the town
thoughtfully selected a site among golf-courses,
at a part of the coast provided with an esplanade
and within easy evening reach of Prestwick and
Ayr. The population comprises three social
strata, namely, the 17th H.L.I., the 15th Royal
Scots, and landladies, with a number of young
ladies to bridge the gulfs between them. It is
not yet officially determined which of these is
the elite, but the H.L.I. men go abou~ as though
they owned the place. Troon is exceptional
among the to\~ns of Western Europe in having
an overwhelmmg preponderance of males in jt~
population, a condition of things highly favourable
to the designs of the Troan'damsel.,.
Another striking feature is the excellent climate,
which maintains the people in such youthful
vigour that the average age is probably under
thirty. This has a bearing upon the rents of
summer houses. Most of the people live in
places called billets, closely resembling houses,
but although they are • billets' they are not
ticketed houses. The beds are understood to he
feather ones. The rate of wages in Troon is
exceptionally low, most able-bodied men having
no more than a shilling a day; but the
inhabitants are so thrifty that they can save
enough to enable the local Opera House to pay
more than 50 per cent. dividend--without
advertising.
The neighbourhood of Troon is constantly
swarming with enemies, but they are system.
atically routed and wiped out every day except
Sundays. Consequently the town feels perfectly
secure. There are noteworthy signs of
an agricultural revival in the district, because
large numbers of the inhabitants are being
trained in the use of the spade. This may be
part of a new Government scheme for developing
the derelict glens of the Highlands. Strict
sumptuary laws are in operation. Most of the
male popUlation are compelled to dress in a
prescribed style, and only genuine moustaches
are approved. The daily programme of most
of the male population consists of eight hours'
sleep, eight hours of what is called parade, and
eight hours of polishing buckles. Parade
denotes a series of very strange games, some of
them reminiscent of childhood. Some look
dangerous, but the ammunition is believed to
be seriously defective.
Troon has a flourishing shipbuilding yard
where ships of war may often be seen on the
stocks.. Its harbour could easily contain the
whole of a Dreadnought. The shipyard also
makes ammunition for the H.L.I. Its defences
comprise the fortress of Dundonald Castle,
believed to be one of a projected series of ring
forts, and the Ballast Bank, consisting of
accumulated deposits. The founders of Troon'
thoughtfully arranged to have ample week-end
communication with Glasgow, and these communications
are cut only during special training.
It is extravagance to pay a first-class fare to
Troon on Saturday, because the return trains
are always mixed." It is quite enough to wait
till the Thirds are full. W. M.

THE OUTPOST.
111
two sets to the Battalion team's ten. B Company
always managed to get a good team together, and
on 'Wednesday, 21st April, beat C Company team
by 12 sets to love.
The last Hugby match of the season was played
tw
on Saturday, 17th April, against the
Rugby 15th Battalion Royal Scots. The
Football. Battalion team had lost two of
their best forwards in Pattison and
Kennedy, who have both gone for Commissions, but
in spite of that we won very easily by 37 points to
nil. The following are the players who took part in
the game :-Pte. 'Warren (B Coy.), Pte. Murray
(E Coy.), Pte. Fraser (B Coy.), Lieut. Laird (C Coy.),
Pte. Montgomery (E Coy.). Pte. Gudgeon (B Coy.).
Sergt. Reith (B Coy.), Lieut. Begg (B Coy.), Lieut.
Maxwell (E Coy.), Lieut. Gardner (A Coy.), Pte.
Dobson (B Coy.), Pte. MacDougaU (B Coy.), Pte.
Fleming (B Coy.), Pte. Carpenter (B Coy.). Pte.
Harris (E Coy.).
With regard to the actual game, it was by no
means so one·sided as the score represents. The
Royal Scots' forwards were really very good, and
their efforts deserved at least one score, but the most
they could get was a touch down. Their back
division, however, was poor, and could give their
forwards no support., Our own backs at first were
not too good, their passing being feeble. but after.
wards they settled down and scored pretty much as
they liked. Lieu!. Laird, as usual. played
brilliantly, and he scored one really great try. He
got the ball at centre. and dodged through practic.
ally the whole of the Royal Scots' team, finally
placing the ball between the posts. Pte. 'Warren
played a very sound game at back. He has played
consistently well in all the Battalion games, and we
have been very fortunate in having such an ex·
cellent full back. The halves and forwards also
played well, and the ball seemed to get to the three·
quarters better in this game. There was quite a
fair number present, so that the funds of the Reel
Cross Society should be appreciably augmented.
An interesting match was played on \¥ednesday,
14th April. between a team of
Tennis. Officers and a representative
team from the Battalion. The
Officers were completely outclassed, and only won
Although the progress of our Platoon League
appears to be very slow, yet we are
Association steadily progressing, and another
Football. stage has been reached towards the
completion of our fixtures. The
positions on the table have slightly
altered, and there have been some rather surprising
results since our last month's issue.
The most outstanding game so far has been that
between Nos. I and 6. both undefeated. The
result of 4'3 in favour of No. I was rather unexpected
as No. 6 was the more fancied team. No. 16, at the
expense of No. 12, added 2 more points to their
total, and have along with No. 15 still to lose their
first point in the competition.
If No. I thought that after beating No. 6, they
had only to gather in the points, they were slightly
mistaken, as they found when playing against No. 10
in their next match. Here again previous results
were of no avail in" spotting the winner," as No. I
was well held, and just managed to keep their
undefeated record, the result being a draw. I goal
each.
As will be seen by the table, No. 19 are steadily
advancing, but it looks as though the remaining
pIa:toons of E Company will require to wait for
more likely recruits before they will be able to
follow. Another surprising result was the score of
2 goals each between Nos. 8 and 11. No. II have
been going so strong and No. 8 so poorly that every
thing pointed to a substantial win in favour of
No. I I. Of course No. I I were greatly handicapped
by a number of their players being on duty.
The positions in the League are as follows
GOALS.
--'--­
Platoon. 1'. W. L. D. For Ag·st. Pts.
No. I. 5 4 0 18 6 Y
No.6, 5 4
0 3;1

112 THE OUTPOST.
many of whom had come from Gailes to support
their representatives. From the start it was
evident that D Company would have to do their
utmost if they wished to make any show against
the Gailes boys, who were shaping very well. The
16th team wasted no time in gaining ground, and
their lead at half time showed their superiority.
In tile second half they maintained their ascendency,
and D Company had to admit defeat by 4 goals to 2.
The team from Gailes created a fine impression, and
are to be complimented on their victory.
B Company and D Company on Wednesday,
21st April, proved a good game, and attracted the
attention of the soccer enthusiasts in these Corn.
panies. In the first half D Company, playing with
the wind, had easily the best of matters. The score
at the interval of I goal each did not represent the
run of the play, which was mostly in favour of D
Company, and had their forwards been able to
finish, they would have had a good lead at the
interval. Play in the second half was more evenly
contested, but there was no further scoring, though
towards the enci B Company almost secured a win.
Another Inter.Company match took place on tbe
Polo Ground, on Monday evening, the 26th ulto.,
between teams representing A anci E Companies.
This was the first appearance of the " youngsters"
aptly named by our R. S.-)1., and that they ga\'e
a good account is evident from the final result which
ended in their favour by 3 goals to 1.
Half time saw E Company leading by 2 goals to 0,
although the game up to this stage was very evenly
contested. A high shot from the right early in the
second half gave A their first and only goal, and
against the wind E Company came away in grand
style, and Clark their centre forward, had the honom
of completing the hat trick. Prominent for E
Company were Armour, Clark, Brackenridge and
Gulhooly, and for A Company Cox, Crocker, Sergt.
\Vatson.
No doubt from the result of the grand display
given by E Company, they will now be allowed a
place in the Battalion,
A trial game between two teams chosen frolll
players in the Battalion and called the" Black and
White," and" Blue" team, took place on Friday
evening, 30th nit., on the Polo Ground.
This game was arranged for the purpose of
" spotting" any talent previously unobserved, but
lacked a great deal of interest 011 account of quile a
number of selected players not turning out. A
fairly interesting game however, was served up,
and ended in favour of " Black and \Vhite " team
by 3 goals to 1. Another game will, no doubt, take
place shortly between a selected Battalion team and
the" Rest," and should prove very interesting.
15th April.--Battalion versus Glasgow Xl.
Played at Polo Ground, Troon,
Hockey Notes. resulted in an easy victory for the
Battalion, by 9 goals to 3. The
Battalion showed excellent form throughout the
game, and were easily value their big margin.
\Vednesday, 14th April.-A Company versus
D Company. A won by 3 goals to 2.
21st April.-B Company versus C Company.
Although C were favourites, B however got a lead
early and managed to come out on top, worthy
winners of a keenly contested game by 3 goals to 2.
28th April.-A Company versus E Company.
E won easily by 6 goals to 2.
28th April.-B Company XL versus Ayr Depot
XI., played at Polo Ground, Troon. B Company
opened in fine fashion and in two minutes gained a
corner, Ayr recovered and almost scored with a
splendid individual effort. Following this B
pressed hard, and after a nice run on the left scored
the first goal. Play ruled fast after this ancl Ayr
scored two goals in quick succession. Half time
arrived, Ayr leading by two goals to one. On
resuming Ayr attacked and scored easily. B then
took the game on hand ancl shortly after added
number two. Five minutes from time B equalised.
Ayr pressed hard till finish, but were unable to
score. Ayr were the better side, but lacked finish.
ing powers. Result-3 goals each.
5th May.-No. 8 Platoon versus "Rest of 13
Company." 13 Company won easily by 5 goals to r.
On Monday, 19th April, C Company of Ours
beat D Company, 15th (S.) Battalion
Tug-of·War. Royal Scots. On \Vednesday, 21st
April, C Company, who are still
unbeaten, successfully pulled a comrosite Battalion
team. On \Ve

THE OUTPOST, 113
Special Training.
A NEW MARCHING SONG.
OH! we're out on Special Training, over hills and
on the sands,
'With ' Full.kit' upon our shoulders and our
rifles in our hands,
'We've our bayonets, and our bottles, and our little
haversacks,
And our knapsacks and entrenching tools a.hanging
at our backs.
Then bang the drums, and blow the pipes, and watch
us all advance,
Up and down the Golf Links like a blooming country
nee /
Buglers, blow your bugles till you haven't left a
squeak-
ThEre's a Company a.going on its Special Training
Week!
We miss the early mom parade-we don't wake
with the cock,
We may lie like landed gentlemen till after eight
o'clock.
If, after that, we wish to sleep we've chances for
repose
While the Captain pitches into all the bally KC.O.s.
Then bang the drums-
\Ve go rushing strong positions held by gunners with
no gun,
And we fire five hundred rounds a day, thank Gawd
, it's only fun; ,
Our advances under shell fire we can rate as up to
par,
If the Brigadier should want to know what' blob.
formations' are.
Then bang the drums-
You should see our section rushes; our Commander,
all intent,
Said: "\Ve will rush from pole to pole "-'twas
telegraphs he meant;
So on we rushed' from pole to pole,' but, Goodness,
when we'd done
We felt as if we had been all around the Torrid Zone!
Then bang the dyums-
But vou know, in
you don't
. you'll find
Like marriage wine (see "rru",tn""'Q all the best is
kept till last;
The finest part is when, to other members of the
Corps,
At the Drill Hall on the Saturday, you hand the
rifles o'er.
Then bang the drums-
A. K.
Drawn by
Voice from Grey Gables: .. Come inside! "
Pt•• SI,wart.

114 THE OUTPOST.
S.-M. Tay/or, E Company.
IF loyalty and unstinted praise by the men o.f
E Company count for anythmg, Sergeant­
Major George Taylor has scored a success.
From the start it needed no tellmg that he was
a man of wide experience. Haw recruds under
his able command quickly developed into
capable privates, and to-day the standard of
efficiency attained by the Cumpany generally is
eloquent of the success of a heavy task. Without
disparaglllg the "newly jmed" in the
slightest, it is a heavy task to train a new
company quickly and thoroughly, and it was
only after very deliberate consideration and
selection from many" possibles " that the final
choice rested on the present S.-M. One only
needs to follow the movements of E Company
at drill nowadays to realize how fortunate was
that choice. .
To those unaware of the fact, it will be
interesting to know that the senior Non-Com.
of No. 5 is an H.L.I. man, and it is his proud
boast to have had 21 years' service in the 7Ist,
that famous fighting body which figured so
gloriously in the battle history of the past, and is
now maintaining its prestige agamst our
enemies in France. He joined the 71st in 1893,
and eighteen months afterwards sailed for Malta
where, during a three years' stay, he rapIdly
rose to be full Corporal-a rank then more
honoured and much more difficult to achieve
than in these days of emergency. From this
station Sergt.-Major Taylor went to Devonport
to the regImental depot, where he had done
about eighteen months" work when war was
declared against the Boers in South Africa.
Much a.s he would have liked, he was unable to
proceed to the front at once, having to wait
until his two years' tour of duty had been
completed, but on the expiration of that time he
went out with a draft and rejoined the 7Ist
at Orange River.
Serving through the latter half of the campaign,
the Sergt.-Major expected to return on
the cessation of hostilities, but it was not until
six months after peace had been signed that the
regiment moved out of Africa. The 7ISt then
proceeded to Egypt-how familiar the name in
these davs when rumours seem to hustle around!
-and Cairo was their principal station for about
a year. From lower Egypt Sergt.-Major
Taylor was sent with his regiment to the Soudan
and was garrisoned at Khartoum for twelve
months, following which he proceeded to India,
and was stationed for several years in the
Bengal Presidency. The last four or five years
of hIS service \Vere spent at Hamilton on the
Permanent Staff. ~ot long before Britain
declared war against Germany, in June, 1914,
to be exact, the Sergt.-Major took out his
discharge as a Colour-Sergeant, a rank which he
had enjoyed for close upon eleven years.
Assuredly he had done his little bit, but
although he was enjoying the quietude of
ciVIlian life and occupymg a good position,
Sergeant-Major Taylor could not resist the
temptation to re-enlist, and hostIlIties had no
sooner commenced than hIS mind was made up
to give KItchener's Army the benefit of hIS
experience.
We are, indeed, glad to have such
a capable soldier in our midst.
t t t
Ode to My Pack.
O
Rapid Fire.
LOATHSOME Pack
That sore dost rack
My patient back!
Alas! alack 1
To hang thee 'xac­
-t I fear I lack
The happy knack.
Thy grip-like wrack
My bones doth crack,
Or else thou'rt slack
And then dost ac­
-t the Jumping Jack,
And mak'st me tack
Along the tract,
As does a smack
'When skies are black.
But do not cack­
-le, bloated Pack,
Wnen we attack
y ou'11 get the sack;
With ready" jack"
Thy straps I'll hack,
Accursed Pack 1
t t t
c. W. S.
IN the article on "l\farksmanship" in the
last number of The Outpost, reference was
made to Sergt.-Major Instructor of Musketry
Wallingford's score of 32 hits at 200 yards with
32 rounds in one minute.
Colonel Morton lately received, in a letter
from Strensall, Yorks, particulars of a new
record for one minute's firmg that has just been
set up there at the end of ApriL
Lieutenant Jackson actually got off 35
rounds and put them all on the regulation
target at 200 yards. He scored 9 bulls =36
points, 18 inners = 54 points, 5 magpies = 10
points, and 3 outers =3 points, a total of 103
out of a possible 140.
This feat shows marvellous rapidity and
precision of movement in loading, manipulating
the breech mechanism, aiming, and firing, and
constitutes a record which will certainlv take
some beating. "
It is further valuable as an example to all of
what the fine weapon, with which the British
soldier is armed, is really capable. M. D.
I

THE OUTPOST.
115
I
A Visit to the Range.
When the last shot had been fired, and the
targets brought up to be examined, an eager
group gathered round the sergeant, as he
THE platoon had been marched off from the
applied the chip potato lifter to the first card.
Parade Ground to the Drill Hall to the
entire satisfaction of the officer in charge and " Verrie good! Yin at each corner and a
his satellite, the platoon sergeant. Though the miss. You should try shrapneL 'Wait and
ultimate destination of the rank and file was the shoot again, my lad."
range, a temporary p;)sition was taken up in the "Number two? That's better, ver fower
rich, undulating meadows behind the hall itself, shots all well grouped, but then ye've a miss~
for the purpose of enabling the men to have a Nothing."
little recreation in the form of bayonet fighting, " Three) All missed! Oh, aye, you wit
while their less fortunate companions were shootin' wi' blank? Wait and shoot again."
instructed in musketry. "Number four? Not bad, just missed a
The first half dozen men fell in on their right 'p;)ssible.' Twenty fur that."
marker and were soon steadily swinging along " Number five? Three hits. J tel't ye, ve
in column of route in the direction of the range, wir shootin' at the fioor~Nothing. Try again."
where a very pleasant ten minutes were spent
"'Who's is this-number six? Fine card.
in receiving final instruction in aiming and
Lovely group. Twenty-five."
'letting-off." "First pressure, three p;)unds,
Second pressure, five pounds. Total pressure, " Next six ready? Come on then, mo-o-o-ve.
five pounds!" Thus spak:; the sergeant in This is nnt a fall-oot ! "
charge of the class. Sergeants, by the way,
J. T. S.
have a wonderful piece of mechanism, called a
Slide Rule, for working out intricate calculations
such as this. "Now, in case ye don't all
understand, I'll go over it again. First
pressure, three pounds. Second pressure, five
pounds. Total pressure, five pounds." The
sergeant's instructive remarks were here
interrupted by the voice of the companysergeant-major
in charge of the shooting
accommodation.
" First six fur shootin', get fell in."
The first six were then led by devious paths,
till each man stood on the edge of the raised
platform, with a rifie on his right front, and a
copious supply of ammunition beside it. At
the word" Commence," each individual flopped
down as if he were doing an attack under the
very nose of the Brigadier-General, and took
up his rifle. After a few preliminary snaps, the
firing began in earnest. When each man had
fired cne shot, the order to "Cease fire," wc s
given, and the attendant went up to the end of
the range to rep;)rt the results of the shots.
"Miss-Miss-Miss--Outer, three o'clock­
Miss-Magpie, six o'clock." Thus ran the
scoring. 'When the marker had regained a
p:>sition of cornpara ive safety behind the firing
line, the shooting e-commenced. Occasional
clouds of dust from the floor indicated the close
proximity of some bullet's billet, and such
clouds were immediately followed bv volley
o( blank verse from the- sergeant-major. That
worthy, however, always encouraged the men
by his kindly, if sarcastic remarks.
" If ye open yer eyes, Tamson, e'll maybe
have a better chance 0' hittin' the target," or, Drawn b:I Pt•. 81,.,,11.
" Try the other end 0' yer gun, Mack."
Oh Lor'! This is more like a convulsion than a fit.

116 THE OUTPOST.
A COMPANY.
OUR week of Special Training commenced on
Monday, I9th April, when, under adverse
climatic conditions we trekked to Ploughland Farm,
prepared at an cost to " put a sprag" in the enemy's
wheel. Having entrenched ourselves, we sat down
to lunch. (\Vhere. oh wher,:; had our two-wheeled
Coffee Pot gone /) After lunch the enemy appeared
in the usual close formation which cheered the
hearts of our Maxim Gunnists. Up came our
reserves, so, needless to say. we cleared the field of
our foe. also of our trenches which we wound up
preparatory to returning.
The following day the enemy was reported to be
at West Gaiies, so on we went, and to our Company
fell the lot of ousting the enemy (S ..M. Dobbie,
section boards, etc.), from his advanced post. This
we promptly did, in fact we had to repeat it, ere the
en ,my believed it. n the afternoon, before the
advance of General Hinderburglar's army corps we
executed a strategic retirement. He was for the
time being outwitted, but on Wednesday, pushing
on towards the \Vaterworks, regarding which he had
base designs, he was prepared to contest the ground
to the N.E. of the Reservoir. Forewarned of the
comin(( Budget increases, we must needs win and
save the Waterworks. Over hill and dale we pressed
till, getting to grips, we dealt him the coup de grace,
wrested the position from him and rested on it
subsequently for lunch. Th3 prisoners were
brought to Troon and were interned or interred
according to choice.
Thursday morning saw our friend the enemy
occupying the Old Troon Golf Course. Our scouts,
ever awake and knowing that machine guns and
rifles are not included in the golfer's kit, at once
decided that they were ho enemy. \Vith one
platoon as advance screen we moved cautiously
forward till, sighting tile foe, we dealt him such
blows on the right and left flanks respectively and
respectably as to brin; him to a discussion of terms
of surrender. These were discussed durins lunch,
but strong reinforcements appeared against us and
we decided to withdraw. This we did by diverse
means, contesting every foot of ground, and
exacting a heavy toll by means of our two stick
machine gun. The enemy's right was wrong in
sauntering over exposed ground. They were
accordingly scored off ere we retired for the night.
The scene of our engagement on Friday was
Cleavance Farm, and, notwithstanding the
difficult ground we had to cross, we succeeded in
putting the enemy to rout. Our efforts were so
appreci~ted that we had to repeat the dose a
second, aye, a third time. \Vearied with well
doing, etc., we arrived at the Drill Hall where we
handed up the remainder of our ammunition.
Having cleaned our rifles and washed down our
bayonets we received our weakl; pay.
We were up betimes on Saturday, and after
Battalion Drill handed up our weapon 1 to others
to •• carry on. I j
After a week of physical drill, "Haking," wall
climbing and other manly sports we proceed on a
series of night operations of which more anon.
Sergt. Wishart, who met with accident at the foot.
ball match with Petty.Officer of H.M.S. Rifleman,
is now progressing towards recovery, and we hope
to have him back amongst us soon.
t t t
B COMPANY.
FOR a brief space Burns' Cottage had to take a
back seat as the chief place of interest in
Ayrshire, all on account of a small piece of ground
facing Bentinck Crescent. There, where many a
platoon league game has been fought, B Company
had the honour of digging trenches in the latest
design sent home from the front. From far and
wide came sailor, soldier and civilian to view the
barbed wire entanglements, look·out posts, machine
gun pit, shelters, cook house, dressing station,
garrison, etc., and the invisible subterranean
sniper's post, out on the flank, constructed by our
C.·S.·M. But the historic spot is now no more, as
we have had to restore the ground to its normal
condition.
We completed our third week of Special Training
carrying full weight in the shape of loose iron
wrapped in our old socks. If it is suggested that
the socks were holey it is a libel; it was our respect
for Government property which was holy.
Although again on the same areas. we manceuvred
over some new ground, and gained fresh experience,
including a good grounding in " mutual support."
Following the Training \Veek we had a most
inspiriting period of bayonet fighting and physical
training under Sergt. Shuttle, with pleasant
intervals of "Haking" in ideal summer weather. If
we entered upon our first week of night training
with somewhat mixed feelings, these were dispelled
by the bright moonlight. Such a succession of
brilliant Venetian nights, while hardly ideal from a
training point of view, found none of us regretting
our beds. Our work was, however, put to the test
on our last night which was dark and lowering. and
we got full value of our luminous compass. The
most interesting compass marching in attack
formation was, of course, that which brought us
into touch with the cooker on Harpercroft Road,
the attack on which left nothing either to be
desired or otherwise. We congratulate our
C.Q.. M .. S. on the excellence of his coffee. The
hour before dawn was a little trying, but the driving
mists, although chilly and spectre like, enabled us,
when day broke, to carry out our assault success·
fully under its cover, without expenditure of
ammunition-a verv vital consideration in these
days. .
Congratulations to Lieut. F. D. Morton, on his
promotion to second in command of E Company,
and to his Platoon Sergeant and successor, Sergt. J.
Macarthur, on being appointed to a Commission ip
the Battalion and posted Commander of No. 8
Platoon; also to Sergt. W. 1. Thomson, on his

THE OUTPOST.
117
promotion to Platoon Sergeantvice Sergt. Macarthur.
Congratulations likewise to the other members of
B Company on being appointed to Commissions in
the Battalion, namely Private P. H. Graham (posted
to No. 6 Platoon), and Privates H. C. Colvil and
H. G. Hendry. Since our last report other eight
members of B Company have departed to take up
Commissions, viz.: Lance-Corporals J. H. Haddow
and W. B. Robertson, Privates R. M. Pattison,
J. Laing, J. W. Binnie, K. S. ~Iiller, J. T. Hayes
and J. W. Anderson. We wish them the best of
luck.
To tUrll tu Athletics, we can unly commiserate
with No. 6 Platoon upon their first defeat in the
Platoon League, inflicted by No. I Platoon, which
likewise had won all previous matches. The
result was a surprise, considering that No. 6 Platoon
Xl., representing B Company, had just given
further demonstration of their calibre by playing a
drawn game with the formidable D Company XI.
As regards Tennis and Golf, we have been very
successful in our Inter-Company matches, and are
showing a marked improvement at Hockey. \Ve
do not yet despair of getting together a good
Tug-of-war team, and Private Murray is doing his
best to this end. B Company are not at all satisfied
with the result of the last pull against C Company,
and are firmly resolved to reverse the result at the
first opportunity.
\Ve hope to be well represented in the Battalion
teams, presently being selected for the proposed
Brigade Sports. Up to time of going to press
Battalion trials for three events have taken place,
viz.: the One Mile, the 100 Yards, and the Broad
Jump. In the One Mile trial we made an excellent
appearance as the following results will show :-I:

118 THE OUTPOST.
--eloquent in its simplicity of pastoral peace-­
strike responsive chords. Round and about us
were the "everlasting hills," but their noble
contours were made to serve no higher purpose
than "fire positions" from "first" right up to
" final." Our good Colonel, by remitting a couple
of hours of work, made us thankful, but nature left
us dumb. \Vednesday provided a fine experience
of attacking under difficulties. It was on Gailes
Golf Course, and the clouds at intervals gave us a
sample of their frozen contents. During the
afternoon an extra big one outdid the previous
smaller fry and ponred from its ample bosom a
storm of sleet that was borne along by a tearing
wind to our utter confusion and serious discomfort.
Never have we been better able to realise the fine
spirit and endurance that animated our Allies
in the East in their great battles in the frozen
Carpathians. Even a friendly hedgehog captured
by one, Andrew W.B.G. complained of the unexampled
severity of the weather which, it said,
made it bristle with annoyance.
A very interesting scheme of outposts had been
arranged for Thursday night, and the services of the
cotIee and hot potato cart had been requisitioned,
After spending the morning in our various back
gardens judging distance and attacking strongly
fortificd wash-houses and other apartments that
abut our various billets, we betook ourselves to the
parade ground at 1 p_m. packed and puttied, only
to be told that in view of the unsettled weather
there would be no parade. In confirmation of this
weather description the sun soon after burst forth
and condemned us to football and other tiring
recreatiolls for the whole afternoon. The poor old
hot spud cart didn't even get a look in.
Briefly, our second week of Special Trailling
emphasised lessons previously learned and provided
new ones. There was more confidence in the
attacks, and the initiative of fire units was displayed
by their facile adaptation to thc varieties of cover
offered by our training areas. Truly may it be
said here that as we advance we learn.
\Vc embarked with mixed feelings on our first
week of night operations. We spread our sails
all an hitherto untried ocean and while there was a
novelty in it pleasurably alluring, the proverbial
length of the hours of darkness foreshadowed a
tedious undertaking. Marching by compass-" that
funny little thing with lights in it," as ont; of our
lady friends remarked-is tiresome and woefully
slow. On the other hand there is much in night
operations which is delightful. Darkness shuts all
the distracting influences of day, and as Olle lies
amidst the huddled forms of the platoon waiting
Jar the rest of the Company to " come up," gazing
into space with its infinity of starry wonders, the
prettiness of daylight gives place to a broader
appreciation of the work of the Great Architect, and
belittles to vanishing point the puny, yet sanguinary
efforts of earth's would-be emFire builders.
Again, how fine it was on Dundonald Hill on
Thursday night with a new moon shedding its
luminous light on the Firth until it looked like a
sea of silver, ami the gradual coming of dawn from
the first blush that paled the stars in tlle east and
sent the lark aloft with its p;:ean of praise for the
gift of another day, to that fulness of light which
turned the blurred outlines of darknes3 into the
firm lines of reality. We occupied the trenches
that existed only in imagination, and gave rein to
our tongues while the sacrificial smoke from an
hundred pipes ascended heavcnwards. 'Wc made
the welkin ring with song and chorus on the bright
morning march home, and not a few incautious
maidens in slumber attire beat a hasty retreat
without even putting down the blind again on
learning the cause of the r.acket. Friday night was
as the preceding~-minus the compass march~
except that rain and mist made the al}pea.rance of
the field kitchen a very welcome event. Never
was coffee quaffed with'such relish, and we salute
the kitchen staff who provided without stint in
both quality and quantity. The morning and the
week's training concluded with a sleepy hour of
Battalion Drill on the Polo Ground, and we
returned to our billets with the prospect of starting
the daily round of routine on Monday.
Our congratulations (somewhat belated, but
none the less sincere) to Company S.-M. Dunsmore
on being elected President of the Sergeants' Mess.
During the month we have had our first defeat
and first win as a Company. The former when we
bit the dust at soccer to the tUlle of 4 goals to 2
before the onslaught of B Company, 16th H.L.I.,
Gailes, and the latter when we beat E Company
at tug-of-war. The Company romped home in a
Battalion two mile race on the Polo Ground on
the 1st lilt., and we have no doubt that our very
excellent Company has other victories to its credit
which, ullfortunately, have not come to the notice
of the miserable hack responsible for this column.
The vacancy caused by the transfer of Captain
1'\eilson is to be filled by Captain Alldersol1, who,
since the formabon of the Baitalion, has been
attached to C Company. The ~.C.O.s and men
extend a hearty welcome to Captain Anderson, of
whom they have heard many good things.
t t t
E COMPANY.
THE last month has oeeu ouc of rumours.
Egypt, India, France,all have been spoken
of as the destination of the Battali'oll which, as every
one knows, is E Company, including a few other
groups of men. The rumOl1rs about warmer climes
(in more ways than one) latterly changed to a place
nearer home, and the scent was very hot ill conl1ection
with Prees Heath, which by the way, is in
Shropshire, in case anybody ill the Battalion may
not have found the information for himself. By
Jove! you did cause a stir with that cutting,
"Mack." Even our worthy S..M. was excited.
Now all are satisfied that for the present WaIlacefield
is good enough, and there we are.
Talking of rumours, how many times have wc
been told that we start Company Training. This
information even got the length of being on Orders,
but was cancelled the following day. The Orderly
Room should reaily be a little more careful, shocks
of this nature are bad for the heart, and none of us
want to appear on Orders as being" Struck off the
strength of the Battalion accordingly," unless it be
for the purpose of being gazetted to a Commission.
like our popular Sergeants Angus and Dobbie.
They are not very far away, however, and it is
quite possible that we shall see a great deal of them
before leaving for ~~-.-- somewhere in-­

THE 01JTPOST.
119
At last we have all been reduced to the commOli
ruck, namely khaki. clad warriors, Judging,
however, from the manner in which some of the
bhoys swank along" La Rue d'Esplanade," they are
highly pleased with it, and the fervent protestations
of love for the blue have given place very quickly to
admiration for the khaki. \Vho was the bold lad
who fancied that our white woollen gloves were
intended to be worn with our latest suits? Does
he hail from Paisley?
Kow to training. The few days which we have
been privileged to spend on the specified training
areas. have been voted on all hands a great success,
and the general opinion iF; that we could do with
more of them. Our first visit to Ko. 6 was under
the watchful eye of the Colonel, but as his remarks
:were fairly praiseworthy we must have performed
quite creditably. Another day spent beyond
Dundonald was not so enjoyable, a fairly keen East
wind making it rather chilly. Old Troon Course
should also by now know the steady marching and
doubling powers of the Company, as we have lately
made a few attacks there.
Since the last notes, several changes have taken
place amongst our Commissioned ranks. Lieut.
Kitchin first of all left to take up duty with the
Royal Marines, much to the disappointment of
Ko. 20 Platoon. His place has recently been filled
by Lieut. Brown from A Company. Captain
Cassels has also left us to become second in command
of C Company, while Lieut. Morton of No. 8 Platoon
now occupies his place. Among the N.C.O.s
Lance.Sergt. Woyka is now a full.fledged triple
striper.
The sporting side has been fairly well maintained,
but there is still a lack of keen interest in some
sports. Possibly the hot weather is responsible,
hut for the honour of the Company some of our lads
must buck up. In golf we flattered only to deceive.
After a comparatively easy victory over C Company
B Company came along and wiped us out. Now,
where are our followers of the Royal and Ancient
game, that they allow this?
In soccer and hockey we are doing well. No. 19
Platoon in particular are upholding the Company's
honour in the former sport, and have only lost one
game out of five played. As this was the Jirst game
played by No. 19, and their team was far below its
present standard, other platoons had better take
note. Their victims to date have been Nos. 2, 7, 14
and 9, while Ko. 15 were lucky enough to meet them
when they were very much under strength. The
victory of the Company over A was only to be
expected when our stars were at top form.
DI'Qun by] Scout-")f I get over you'll damwell toss me UP. and if I don't II'll. Hutclu,olf.
the Captain will blooming well blow me up."

12() THE OUTPOST.
Sub·Editorial.
the Battalion, and it would be a great pity
should the little inconveniences of the tented
field prevent our artists and writers from
interesting and amusing us. Contributions are
maintaining a high standard, and compliments
for The Outpost come from all quarters. Our
physical qualities are eye-apparent on parade.
and we wish to have our intellectual excellencies
also made tangible, and this can best be done
through the medium of the Magazine. It
supplies thatincentive to polish and keeps active
just those attributes of culture and education
which are apt to be neglected in these strange
days.
All matter intended for the June number
should be in our hands on or
Contributions. before Monday 24th May. We
trust that those who don't see
\Vhen we go under canvas we hope that their work in a certain issue will possess themcontributions
will not fall off. It selves with patience, as it is not always expedient
In Camp. may be urged that we shall have or possible to produce a contribution in a given
fewer facilities for writing and month, but so good is everything sent in that
drawing than we had in billets. When a tent practically all of it will appear sooner or later.
is full of the genus homo, clothes, equipment Last issue sold exceedingly well, and our
and other impedimenta, one may not feel civilian neighbours seem as interested in our
inclined to squat on a valise and write a sonnet journalistic activities as ourselves. However,
to a lady's eyebrow, or draw on bristol board the time is nigh when we shall have to relinquish
the trials and humours of life in camp.
all pens and papers and get into the hurly-burly
We have unearthed a lot of excellent talent in where it must be aut Caesar aut nullus.
I OPENING NOTICE.
TROON PAVILION
ESPLANADE, TROON.
The Merry Golfers Party.
_.. ' ­
THIS SBASON WILL INCLUDB :-~
HAIDEE ST. GEORGE A ARCHIE DAYNE
(After their successful World Tour).
CONSTANCE WII.I..S
(The Troon Favourite, Season 1914).
CICLEY ESDAII..E " BERNARD KNOWLES
(From Tivoli and Pavilion, London), and
CHAR...IE WHITEHI......
Producer and Manager,
The Successful Comedian of Prestwick and Glasgow Exhibition, 1911•
Principal Comedian of the big Revues" Hullo Ragtime,"" Happy Days," etc.
FIRST PERFORMANCE :-­
7.30 p.m. .,... Saturday, 29th May.
Thereafter Twice Dally. 3 and 7.30. POPULAR PRICES.

THE OUTPOST.
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No. 5.
UR first Wednesday at Prees Heath Camp
O will long live in the memory of the
Battalion, not so much on account of the
sensatlon we created in the district bv our
turn-out in scant attire for the usual sports'
parade, but for the more scantily clad parade
which disturbed our slumber later in the
evening. Amid the nightly din to be heard in
the Mad Musicians' hut, the Egyptian mummy
was asked what he would do in case of fire
breaking out, and he facetiously remarked,
" Call out the Guard, of course." The mummy,
we might explain, rolls himself up in his three
blankets, and then securelv fastens the ends
with a host of pins. '" Lights out" had,
as it seemed to our sleepy heads, just sounded,
when an awful uproar brought us partially to
our senses. At first it looked as if the eleven
o'clock pass contingent had just arrived, but no:
something unusual had occurred, and the word
flew round that fire had broken out. The flare
which lit up our hut windows lent colour to the
rumour, and this was confirmed by the ensuing
bugle calls and whistle blasts. So we woke up.
It was evidently a case of every man for himself,
and we scrambled into the nearest articles of
apparel we could feel in the confusing darkness.
One man, who appeared in nothing but pyjamas,
and evidently thought shaving for parade was of
first importance, clung tenaciously to his safety
razor, and it was said aftenvards that quite a
JUNE.
The Fire Alarm.
number had made their way to the parade
ground with nothing on but a look and-­
their money belts.
We were a motley crew, probably very like
the survivors of a wrecked liner, but assurance
was soon given when we heard the commanding
voice of our Sergeant-::Vrajor call for" lESS noise
on parade," just as if we were on parade.
Squads were flying past by this time, and we
were sure the Company on duty would get
V.C.'s galore by the shape they were making.
What if the fire spread to Whitchurch and the
ladies of the League of Honour were imperilled ?
What a p:cnic. It would give us a chance to
take some of them in our strong arms for once
at least. But the phantom stretchers were only
the fire-screens, and the picquet must have been
successful in their labours, as not even the glare
of a lighted match was now to be seen.
'Tallion-'Shun-Dis-miss t
We could scarcelv believe our ears when we
heard the clear, metallic ring of the Adjutant's
voice scattering the parade and shattering our
hopes of some midnight fun. We had at least
expected half-an-hour's " Swedish" to complete
the last hour's work of the fast-closing day, but
that was reserved for our usual seven a.m.
parade next day. Snores greeted our entrance
to the hut and we asked ourselves, "was it
possible?" Yes. The Egyptian mummy had
blissfully slept through it all. DECOY.

]22 THE OUTPOST.
Do You Know.
THAT boot polish should not be used for
cleaning windows? \Vindow cleaning may
be done as follows :-Take a clean wet cloth in
the right hand, and grasping the v.'indow
(turned right inside) firmly in the left, pass the
cloth gently over the surf

THE
TP T ,
T
'
H E order to Jeayc T roon had p -t1" OIll C
at I ;L~t, rLnd s p 'c ulation \\" Cl:; ri re as lu th '
:uilability of I'r '~, fro m 0 111' p oint uf vil'\\',
T lte packing- lip o E lInmilitary illlpcd imenta ,
prep ;t ra t ol'y t o s n ling S,I,llle h om e, was" hig
jo b, a ne! tht:! say ing "ood -bye tu la ndlords and
la odladios, amI t;d (r iend, ; now
\\'(' \\ er e r o;t!l y goin ' a way, T h firs t eonli u ' 'nl
l() I>"ve \\ as ,\ Conipan:', l () \\'It i ,It was t Ul ch d
tll ' pi pe llil d e r ~ ' halllrtlen;
rlro" nail,; i u l 'l adj aceot IIllflnisll'd h uts and
v ibrated thl) roof"in g i run, Il lI lil 'om liS
onjurNI u p v i:i(mi u f l11 ' 'Iydc llipyard ~ ,
H wcver, \ ' 11 er . :,()on I >cl into /J 11 h u ls , Ilid
s lowe cl a w;! ~ ' ali i' gear. '0 c'ljXl.c:o u ' \\ ' ardr o l> e~
a nd spacio ll, h 'b f d , wers 11 re ; only a
n ,1ITOW s h 1, two cloth 's 1 e"s 'I,no (! ~ mall ki t
ba g, D r iye a n addi t ional n a il in 0 t l1 c ~'
;;;~ red wa lls, .' re,"" in ,tn exlr;\ n ecc~s a ry l !1lll k,
]Ju t up a handy n ee>;:;

124 T - < OUTPOST,
gen t le m en, w ho cl erve the U rder of ;\ler; l.
But the a mp i.. miles from a ny \\ here , P rces
is tLlr e mii ofT, )fa rk t-D rayton c ght miles
1\11 a v, aod \Vhilc!turc!t, Lhe neares l 'town .'
another t.h rec mi las,
H UlVev r, on 'atllrclav aft ernoons . the bhors
rh ck into Ch. l ' r and 'Shre\\"sbllrv-tllt:!V g .~; c
Cr 'we a m b s in baulk a nd t h ll~ sholl: th ir
wisdom-an d from w h aL can be ~cc n a nd !teard,
LiteI' a re vl'ry, ' " ry ma'l)" a ttra Lio ns ill the
aiu rc.lllen tinn (\ tall ns that h;we ea u. eel the
le'ls to forget ~(J m e of tlleir regpts a t being (J ut
of 'colland , U ur parclllc gro und \I 'a~ a heat ll:'
WA,SlC wben we illT ived. but a Saturd a y morni ng
s p ~ n t: on it with n rcnc!t ;ng LUols removed Cl
ton or t \\" of ileat lle r alllI renclcTcci it fai rl v
pre entabl ',
'
A WlltC march l o :\'[ark t­ Dnly[oll. in
;,:tmosph ere rescm ll in g" that in t he I i 1.J1.J le
P ahl c o f the C; iasgO\\ B OLa nic Ga nkn>i, \1,1,
s uccessfully Cl 'col1lp li,' h >c1, n.nd the t(J\lntol);
gave us a. fin rec ph n, ' \ n t her nlarch [olJk
us to J [In-b erwick, ab u l Jifl n m iil'>i in all.
find a lihu ugh t h er e wa:; no pul!. or inn, t hen,
\I·c. a letter 1.J x and g.tl lons uf pure >ip riug \I·,iler.
, nother chy \I'C lI'ent to \VCI1I, and s'l lnpkd ih
cid r d uring a n h , ur's (all-out , lI'h :ch cider
didn't aitog ' ther pruve to he a bsol ukk void of
t rac s of iavs l\'t' arc
lea"ing h 'rc soon fo r a n ther pa rt oi Iura fi rlllll ,
,.Lnd ~o me o f th ' b huys wit I g ruJ'\lbled ';0 Il IUCiJ
at t he Camp's isol; ltion, a rc' nOli' ,jell ing "
tliliin" wi th iIl1J11 ul a1.Jk re"'r ts .

TU,· OUTP ST .
l ~ii
BATTALION
NOTES.
L .\ST month's 15Sl\'; saIl the Batlalion mak ing
preparations fo r a move ; t hi ~ month'" i ~s Ll '
,;,,~s the move an nc o mpli ~h d fact. • 'othi ng ill
the history 0 the Battalio n s ince it , inceptio n has
bccn so Illomento ll lor the wel a re 0 every member
II I the unit. ,\ t P r ' c~ Camp we a re a ll loge ther ,
admin istra liou is ea.;;~', disCipline IS III re asily
Inain l ined , a.nd the urderly arrange men t uf the
lille,; 'Ind lhe It C'~c d Rndllhe be.·t C) f luck. ­ 1"h 'ir
p lace in the Brigade has b"en tak ' ll hy I he n t h
( '.) Bn. 11e Border Hegtmenl, whn own l lt" ir
incepLion to Lord L Oll dale. T ltey we rai,'eel ill
Carl i, [" a nd a re qui le a likely lot.
_
,\ I 'r Gein at our ncw slatio n fo r so me cw.da}'s
\I't' rC eil·cd. th' pleasing 1Il telllgenc' that tit"
B rigade wml1l.am]c r and Brigade Major. fro m
whom 11-' hac! pa rted willl !ill b n:gr -I whell l e~v in f(
1'1'000 11' re to lal ' up lb ir qua rlcrs at P rces. \\.{'
were l urt her gra t ifie I to lea.rn thu t B t-i!!:ad icr­
General 1". Hack t-'1l1ul11 l>so n \l iI:; 10 tak' cOIlllnnIld
01 t h 97th r igadc a nti that '(Lp la in 11. L. Wuod
\\'as 10 ac l as his Brigad" \la jar. We ongrat 1I1 (l le
ourselves on haung U U I' fu rmer Ge neral wiLli 11
once more.
The Batta lion has bad lhe honour paid t o it uf
It avin" a pta lll R T, 1\eil 'on selecled as Brigadg
Machine Gun Ofllcer. v\'e regret h is I ss as a
Cumpany o mc r, bU l {he honour of supplyin a
membcr of 1 he Staff ou t of Lhe Batta lion aJrurd ~
some solace. L ie u!. ,\. J. B cgg ha a1.o been
selected to act as I'hysica l I ns truclion O ,lcer to
the Bri1:)ad ,
\ \' have plea:mre in welcoming p la in A. H.
e ray, who joined us as Chapla in 0 11 9th :\Iay, Wld
Lieu t. D, . E a ns , wbu \Vas [lusted Lo l he attalion
as :'.Iecl ical (fie r on t he ut h Mav.
' tall-Sergean t Shnttle joined'l he Battalion o n
)st I1ebruary and bns 110 1\' L It 11 up the pOSl of
Physical Drill and B ayonet ,i 'hLi ng I nstTlI Cl0 1' tu
lhc B rigade.
The followi ng N. '.0 .. have undergone COlll'S uf
Ins tructio 11 dUI­ing !l,e mo nth :-
SergeanL ]. \Val 'on. E '01l1p a,ny, t~ lI d o rpoml
.\ . . EJtery, D ompany, dol th chnol uf
Gvm nasia, .\[c1 ersltoL
rgeant k 'oh n , 13 "ompan', a t. t he -chool of
General luslru tiOIl, Chelsea a rra I

126 THE OUTPOST.
Typical?
SOMEWHERE 1;

THE 0
TPOST.
J27
variety in the bosom of the mo t e. peri enced
sea-side landladv. It- is a lso tl1 t:' du r of t h e~e
orderlies to w;·, he dishes aft r each meal.
Valua ble crib ism is passed on their work at the
next meal by the other occupants of Lhe huts.
_ Each 'ahllTJaya m O:it complete spring-clea n­
IIlg IS earned o ut . E verything is hfted 0 11 of
the huts for a n airing, a nd the deck bein g ' hus
cleared for actIon, the floors arc scrubbed ,
windows are cleaned and ledges dusted. T hen
everything i ~ put back in its place a nd everythmg
tha t. hasn 't a place is hidden in kit-bags
or under the bed!;, ready for hut insp ction.
Th in. pecting proces ion having tlHtrched
throngh, the huts a re again quite read y for
further practice in spring-clea ning.
If you a re very lucky you may get a chance of
gaining mo re valuable experience in peelinO'
potat es . And if you arc very daring, yuu 11l

12R
THE
OUTPOST.
assure t he beliE's a.nd g ntlemen, " 'ho give up
: ( mnch time on our account, that t heir
services ;ere m IIch apprec iateri by all, especiall y
b ~r t he' Sa inUy Th i.n.1 .'
p emlanent staff f eigh t m en live on t h
premises, and get throu h a n normo us a mo un l
of work with liti le relie , for the work never
eems to fini sh . After a t ed iOlls day'. I\'ork in
the training fields, or ro ute- marching, a visit to
lh 'y.:I'r.' to sec lite bright, 'heery, kindly
"fa ces of the la li el; i.' uplifting, a.nd s in e the days
when Bohemia \\· a.s on th coast, llothillg S'l
appea lin g and r ci ilisin g as f'1.ir m Riris in a
y . ~,1. ,A. hut has been a rranged . One njoys
• cak e Clnd coffee whi 'h h ave been ha nd d o ut
by a ' modest Dia na, or douce da me who,
pcrh a p ~ , 11, 11 rself g t t\\"o or thre boys in
th A rmy. Th tot a l cost o f a but comp let ,
exclusive of billia rd : , piano, Oypaper and
mousetra I is approximately £ - 0. When
a ll e:qJr sses thanks to the Iadie' \\ Ito providel\
the cas h and th ir sel'vices, they sn ile mod e ·t-ly
'l.!1d ~a ,' thev like to serve 11,. M,' \\"or-r-1'd !
What \~ ' o llld ' P r es Camp be wit hout." our fri litis
-a bJas ell hea h! and ma nv )f t lte hilo\'
\\"uuld h ave gone enquiring: " H ow f ar is 'it
Ga lled to Forres," or giving vent to the old
pl;lint : " Lt's a far cry to Loch ,,·e."
However, \y e havc made ma llY friends , a nd the
cmharra

THE OUTPOST,
129
It's a better day this!
.. ..
* *
When a budding' litterateur' }i.C.O. was asked
if he had any pars for' ong dee ' he only tumbled to
the idea when it was pronounced' on ditt:
* * '* * +:
The man who usually contributes this column is
indisposed. I will try to copy his inimitable
style :-There are more Preesbyterians in the
Battalion than other denominations. Ah! I have
it. Preesbywhitchurch.-Prees, then Ypres.-The
Lord preeserve us.
* * * * *
One of our Knuts referred to the canteen beer as
Ondine. This, he explained, is a \Vater.spirit.
* * * * *
"\Vhit church dae ye gang tae on Sunday? ..
" Whitchurch r" "Sixty days 1 "
* * * * *
One ofthe bhoys. new to the' get.your.ticket-first'
arrangement in the Y.M.C.A. hut, ordered his
nourishment and on his tendering hard cash for his
investment, the ministering angel asked: "Have
you not got a ticket?" "No," he answered, "but
my number is 17936 ! "
* * * * '*
Gerald thinks the rule about standing to one's
bed at 9.30 p.m. should not apply to such good boys
as the' Saintly Third.'
* * * * *
Naughty boys are Jock and Berty,
Reformatory lads-ahem!
Got to be in at nine·thirty,
Lights out ten·fifteen p.m.
* * * * +:
\Vhile one of our kilted pipers awaited the Chester
train at Whitchurch, a citizen of the latter' town'
enquired of him where he had come from. "From
Glasgow!" "And where's that? " the Salopian
asked.
* * * * *
Some of the bhoys are beginning to a·Preesiate
the' beauties' of Prees. \Vhat? what?
* * * +: '*
Y.M.C.A. here means-due to the Hon. Mrs.
Corbet's endeavours- Young Men's Constant
Attraction.
* .. .. .. *
Seven bob a week doesn't go far, but most of it
gets to Chester.
* .. * .. ..
The order demanding back our third blanket left
us critically cold. \Vhen the order was cancelled
we took it back with a warm glow of satisfaction.
" For it's Oh to be in England now that Scotland's
there." \Ve are browning'
* * * * *
One man tells us that the recruits in E Coy. can
give points to the older hands in extended order
drill, while another insists that they are being held
up as an example in the matter of how to handle
the rifle. Good luck to them 1
* * * * *
Who said: "Men without rifles,-Slope Arms,"
* * * * *
When one of our Depot Sergeants was doing
recruiting work in Auld St. Mungo lately, he sent
an anxious letter to Gailes to enquire whether he
would recruit a NIGGER. He must be fond of Jack
J ohnsons, surely!
* * * *' *
Prees Parish Church steeple has been requisitioned
for gymnastic purposes. In view of recent events
this does not come altogether as a surprise.
t t t
Answers to Correspondents.
" CURIOUs."-It is purely a matter of opinion.
Prees has been termed a hamlet, a Village, an
accident, and a disease, but never a town.
"S.A.T. NlTE."-We have heard instances of
signposts being incorrect, but the "Raven" is
certainly not 12,324 paces from Whitchurch. Pace
it again on a Sunday. Requiescat in pace.
"\V11y."-A person with a highly developed
sense of humour could tell you. Try some of the
yokels between here and Market-Drayton.
" P.I. CUPPE."-The league which causes you so
much anxiety is not worth the worry if you have
a pleasant smile.
" ONLY A PRIVATE."-Vacuum Cleaners would,
no doubt, be a valuable asset to the huts' equipment.
\Ve, however, can do nothing in the matter.
" B. \V1LDERED."-We are afraid you have your·
self to blame. A joke's a joke, but a sergeant's joke
is different. You should have laughed.
" OPTIMIST."-,,ve are unaware of the presence of
any skating ponds around these parts. But arell't
you a little previous?
" B.Sc."-(a) Alcohol can certainly be used as a
substitute for the mercury in thermometers.
(b) Old soldiers are always pretty accurate in
estimating the temperature, due, we think, to long
practice and experience.
"ONE OF MANY."-·~Bacon, as a rule, is not
transparent, but is difficult to see against certain
backgrounds.
" ASTONISHED."-There is no truth in the rumour
that we are being fumished with Turkish Baths.
Moreover, route marches just now make these
unnecessary.
"POTTED HEAD."-Your question is obviously
frivolous. Blanc Mange is never on the Army
menu.
" DUBIOus."-Lemon Squash is a good tonic for
nerves. Drink plenty of this and you may be able
to cheek the canteen wrestler. .

130 THE OUTPOST.
,
; \
I EDITORI~L
[
.....,.~
f
t
PREES. JUNE. 1915.
The Glory of the Romance of War.-Shakespere.
TO those who have been taking an interest
in war (and who does not in these days?)
it may seem an anachronism to talk of glory or
romance in connection with this war. :\1any will
contend that the days are past when one could
speak with some degree of truth of " All the
pride, pomp and circumstance of glorious war."
Wars, they say, are no longer waged, and
battles are no longer fought, in any ;;pirit that
permits of the consideration of romance. vVar
has become not an art, but a science, we are
told; it has been reduced to a cold, calculated,
more or less exact science, in which the side
which is the more long-headed, better prepared,
more resourceful, more advanced in the study
'of the Science of \Var-that side is bound to
win. Well, to a large extent, this is quite true.
Those who wish to win must devote their
attention to the study of the scientific side of
war. They must a'pply themselves to it
assiduously, working out in theory what they
intend to put into practice, finding out, if
possible, the laws of the science, the principles
which govern success and failure. Of course,
this does not include the crude, school-boy
knowledge that the German professors have
taken advantage of, with such fiendish joy in
the horrible effects on our comrades. That
could never be considered as part of any science
but that of the Borgias. Real science is a noble
and an ennobling thing, which the German
professors have unfortunately entirely missed.
The other evening our Colonel treated us to a
short dissertation on the Science of War, in the
Regimental' Institute. The lecture was very
interesting and instructive, and we could not
help thinking that this was exactly what was
wanted. If we are to win, we must studv our·
subject until we know all about it. If success
depends on close mental application to the
Science of vVar, the knowledge of certain laws
and principles, then it behoves us to make these
our study. This is precisely where the New
Armies will have the advantage. Take our
own battalion, for instance. \Ve have a wliole
Company of Technical College students and in
the other companies there are many who have
applied themselves to the mastery of some
subject or SUbjects. There is scarcely a man
who has not attended classes of some kind or
another since ever he left school. \Ve are,
therefore, in a position to take up this new
science and master it next. And we are doing
so. vVe are being taught soldiering, but of a
kind which embraces all the good points of the
old training, and, in addition, encourages us in
the study of war as a science. Authoritative
books on the subject are read to us; we read
them ourselves, and we hope to be so far
successful in our study, that obedience to the
principles which encourage success in battle
becomes a second nature. Vile are taught to
understand the why and wherefore for eVen'­
thing we do, and so we do it more gladly. in
short, if we are to win, we require to make use
of every faculty we possess, to use our brains,
and "be not like dumb, driven cattle," but
students of the Science of War, who know their
subject so thoroughly that success is assured.
It is by doing this that the interest of the rank
and file is maintained.
\:Vnere then does the Romance come into all
this discussion ? We are all in favour of classes
for the study of the Science of vVar, and yet we
insist on the glory and romance. The
explanation is simple. War depends largely
on the human element; that is, it is not an
exact science. Considerations whose value
cannot be computed in figures take part in it,
and that is where the romance comes in. It i,
this personal element, the element of human
nature that is so difficult to estimate, so
disturbing to all our calculations, that to such a
great extent governs and over-rules the laws of
the Science of War. That is what makes it
romantic, for where one has human beings to
deal with, 'one never knows: as the old gag
has it, or, in the words of a good play'\vright,

THE FATES AND AUSTRIA.
131
THE CURSE OF THE HOUSE OF HAPSBURG.

132 THE OUTPOST,
but a poor patriot, " You never can tell." It is
this unknown quant.ty wh,ch introduces
romance into what some people would term the
hard facts, and others the tragedy, of war.
Soldiers may be well up in their business and
their leaders may be experts in the Science of
War, but who can tell how these soldiers will do
in action? No one. We can only guess. It
is romantic to think that there are millions of
soldier-students studying the Science of War
at present, and when they go into action they
must show, in addition to the results of their
study, what sort of stuff they are made of.
Human nature, the unknown quantity
probably plays a greater part in war than
anyth:ng else. To quote General Haking. one
of our 'authorities,' "The characteristlcs or
emotions of the human mind wh_ch reqUlre the
most serious consideration are courage and
fear, surpr se, respect and disrespect, cheerfulness
and dejection, comradeship, emulation,
and esprit de corps." Isn't that romantic?
Knowledge of laws or principles goes for naught
if we have not the necessary moral characteristics
to make use of it in a crisis. As Field
Service Regulations has it, "Skill cannot
compensate for want of courage, energy and
determination." And where shall we find
these moral characteristics more strongly
represented than in our Voluntary Army? It
is just among these amateur soldiers that we
are most likely to find courage, respect, cheerfulness,
comradeship and above all, esprit de
corps. We feel sure that our Battalion will
acquit itself well when it is put on its trial, for
we have studied our subject. we are being
carefully prepared and sk,lfully directed, arid
we show everywhere our cheerfulness, our
comradeship and our esprit de corps. These are
the things that count, and they are responsible
for the glory of the romance of war.
CAR.TeR'$ CR.C,I7c, I
) Sou, HFRE \1
~~-.~
/)rIJIlIn by PI,. Th.m •• ",
" Ay! they're awfu' nice lassies, but it's gey expensive buyin' stuff ye dinna want,
jist tae get speakin' tae them."

THE OUTPOST.
133
My DEAR CHICKS,
I have received such a nice letter
which has come all the way from Troon.
Perhaps you would like to read it, so here it is-
H TROON, 30th 1vlay, 191 5.
" DEAR UNKEI, JAl'.iES,
" In the funny magzeen which mummy
bys me now sted off Allysloppers haf Holiday i
allways reed your nice leters to youre ritle
nefews. I am so sorry i can't be a nefew­
Mums says it is too late to arang it-but i wood
like so much to be a neese. Pleese let me--l
have such a lot of sings to whisper. Of course I
can't whisper in a leter, eau I, but i can make
pretend, Do you know your litle nefews were
aful good at make pretend. They used to make
pretend were my sweetharts, and they
eoud do it most like growed up peeples.
"You know, acoarse, deer unkle, that all the
litle nefews are away-way. That Kelly man
took them-I saw him do it-and they al
looked cross wif him too. But 0, Unkle, I am
so lonely wifout them. We uzed to hav such
nise gariJ.es on the shor and links, and it was
jolly meen to take them away. We uzed to
pley in the dark too, and they hided there faces
in my pinafore wen they saw there nurs coming
--who was cald Pikets. Sometimes we uzed to
lern lesons about the stars and the man in the
moon, and wunder where the water went when
the tide goed out. I know now, so will you
pleeze tell my little cousins it goes in to the
caves at Ailsa Craig. If you cood pleese send
a few of youre nefews back to Troon there is a
lot of sings I cood lern them, I am not a good
speller, but I know sum other sings, Please
send sum soon and I will always be
" Your loving little Neese,
" TEENIE."
Teenie must not be sorry she is only a little
niece. If it were not for the nieces, Troon
would not have been so attractive to the
Battalion. And if Teenie is lonely, a great
many of the lads have been lonely, too, since
they left Troon. But, of course, we are all
going back to Troon shortly; October will
see us all back in our comfy billets again.
Uncle James is sorry he can't send any of the
boys back to Troon, as Teenie suggests, as he is
not one of the" high heid-yins," but if the
" Kelly-man " were asked very nicely he might
send some of them to Troon-and a great
deal further, too.
Now that we are all safely settled at Frees I
am going to tell you a story about this spot. It
is called
THE SAD STORY OF 'NEE PETER.
Peter, you must know, was a little beetle who
lived on a peat-bog in Shropshire, called Frees
Heath. At least it was a peat-bog until the
War Office discovered it and built huts on it and
called it a camp. Why they built the camp
there, God alone knows! And when the huts
were ready they began to look about for men to
occupy them, and suddenly they became aware
of the existence of the 17th Battalion of the
H.L.L And that is how we were sent to Prees
Heath.
Peter was born when the huts were well on
their way to completion, and he had four little
brothers. What with the coming and going of
workmen and latterly of soldiers-of a kind­
Peter's mother had a most anxious time of it.
Peter's folk had lived on the Heath undisturbed
for many generations, but now they had been
caught up in the whirl of the great war and
were landed in a regular mess-just as we have
been.
One comfort was that there were nice dry
huts for the little beetles to live in, and old
;vIa-Beetle told her offspring that bye-and-bye
there would be plenty food lying about when
the soldiers came, and so her family looked
forward to good times. But here she was
wrong, because at first there was none. There
was not enough for the brave soldiers, let alone
beetles.
Things improved, it is true, after a bit when
the ruling powers began to learn their job. But
a series of calamities befell the beetle family.
First old Pa-Beetle began to frequent the
wet-canteen at nights and had a rare old time
on the beer spilled on the floor. It was not
good beer-but good enough for Tommies. In
other words, i't was dam rotten. (This is not
original.) And so it came about that one night
Pa-Beetle never came home. .:vIa-Beetle never
found out what had happened to him. But I
may as well tell you that he was found deadnot
drunk, but poisoned. The beer was too
much even for a beetle.
And then Ma-Beetle was 'called' rather
suddenly. The bad language in the huts was
demoralising her little ones, and she decided to
flit. When she was out house-hunting she
came to the hot-and-cold sprays and thought
this was a nice quiet spot to rest in. But one
morning the water was on and Ma-Beetle got a

131 THE OUTPOST.
nasty surprise. The Battalion were surprised
too, when they heard there was actually a good
supply of water. They were qUlte pleased.
But Ma-Beetle wasn't pleased. She was
drowned.
And so the little beetles were left orphans.
One place Ma-Beetle had partICularly warned
her children agamst was the cook-house.
"Beware," she saId, "the SPOTTED-DoG."
The spotted-dog was the beetle family's bogey
man. And wee Peter was intensely curlOUS
about it. At first he thought it must be a low
publ.c-house, and had a vague fear on account
of h.s father's fate. But sometimes he had an
idea, too, that it might be a real dog. So as
soon as they were free from maternal restraint
the five lIttle beetles made straight for the
warmth of the cook-house. There was no sign
of any dog there, but plenty of food, and after a
hearty meal, Peter went out for a stroll. When
he came back his little brothers were gonegone
without a sign, never to return. The
SPOTTED-DoG had got them. Peter found this
out later-next day, in fact. He was enjoying
a nice piece of pudding and came upon a big,
juicy currant. Oh no! not a currant at all
but just one of his little brothers. And only
then did he understand what his mother had
meant.
Wee Peter was now alone in the world, but he
was becoming very fly, and so he decided to live
in a hut safe from cook-house or canteen
dangers. He was rather particular and had
been well brought up, and so he made his home
with No. 27 Platoon, and you have no idea what
a lot of funny things he saw in the hut. For
example, on the days the huts were inspected
there was an awful lot of bother. For three
hours all the men kept shifting things aboutand
the actual inspection only lasted three
seconds. As soon as everything was in order,
a man would come to the door and shout and
all the soldiers would have to rush about and
re-arrange everything. This would happen
about six times each inspection. The fact is,
the' heid-yins ' never knew what they wanted.
It is a way they have in the army.
And then all the clothes and things were taken
off the pegs and hung up on the floor. Wet
towels were thrust into kIt bags on the top of
clean, dry clothes. Sloppy-clouts were hidden
away. The surplus bread and cakes were
stowed behind the beds and pails of water were
put on the table in place thereof. There was
no end of bother. I can tell you hut inspections
were anxious times for wee Peter and finally
led to his undoing. But of that I will tell you
later.
There were other beetles in the hut, and at
night they would come out and do squad drill
on the floor. If you lay awake you could watch
them in the moonlight. And sometimes--on a
Saturday night--some of the men could see
them when they weren't there at all.
One day during hut inspection, Peter came
out of his corner and got snugly settled in the
end of a loaf which was lying about. When the
inspection was over, the men began to put things
in order and to make the hut really clean and
comfy. And the loaf was lifted up on to the
table. Wee Peter, taken by surprise, fell out
of his hiding place, and one of the soldiers saw
him.
" Oh, hell! " said the man, " look at this."
A second soldier came up.
" Wait a second," said he, " I'll show you."
And with that he got the handle of his
trenching tool and smote wee Peter so that he
died. He died suddenly, and there was nothing
left but a stain and a dent in the table.
The soldier laughed. "There," said he,
" that will learn you to be a beetle."
That's the end of the story. Perhaps I will
tell a story about a wee louse next mO.'1th, but
at present I have not yet met any.
Your loving, UNCLE JA~ES.
Off for the Ham and Jam. Pte. Tho",l ....

THE OUTPOST.
135
Walking-Out.
WHEN, conscience clear and duty free,
'Ve contemplate our evening leisure.
'Vhere we will go to after tea
To find the maximum of pleasure.
'Ve gaze across the landscape far, .
\Vhat time the evening shades are falling,
And feel assured the prospects are
Appalling.
On hedgerows tall and pastures green
The eye will roam delightfully,
Until a cow comes in between
And blocks the vision spitefully.
'Twas Providence that put it there
To keep the moving eye from tiring
Of scenes that flatly will not bear
Admiring.
Unconsciously, you wend your way
By narrow lanes with scarce a turning,
And wonder where you can allay
A thirst that's positively burning;
But close-confining hedges keep
The erring eye from such temptation,
So rescuing the soul from deep
Damnation.
In fact, there's every evidence
That walking-out was not intended
To be encouraged, nay, commenced
Until the present war had ended.
So many places' Out of Bounds'
So much from which to keep refraining.
And all within the daily rounds
OtTraining.
J. L. H.
Mess Orderly.
THERE is no end to'fatigues' in camp; some
of these are good and some the other thing,
but th:s orderly business is the blessed Lmit and
quite enough to kill any Featherbed. I have
humphed sacks of flour and sides of beef,
carried letters and gathered heather, scrubbed
floors and scraped pJtatoes, but when it comes
to the orderly job I confess I feel like applying
for a commission in the flying squad.
When one has been sweeping floors and
washing dishes for two days one becomes as
domesticated as any Mary Ann or Bridget.
Then there are grub parades morning, noon and
night, when the orderly struggles home under a
hefty load of provender that requires all the
strength and skill of an acrobat to bring in
safely. Business in th;s line commences with
the early morning coffee, which sees a mix-up
between pyjamas and pants, a mad rush to the
cook-house for the savoury liquid when all the
rest of the fellows are keeping the blankets
warm like sensible chaps.
However, if ham and stew are on the day's
menu the orderly may look out for a certain
liveliness in the hut. It really requires the
brains of a mathematician to dole out these
army luxuries into thirty odd lots, each of the
same size and dimensions. Then there is the
trek back again to the wash house with the
greasy dishes when the rest are smoking
cigarettes. Oh 1 It's a-- 1
But the orderly has also got to keep the hut
clean, for there is sure to be a visit from one of
these cheeky duffers with the stripes they call
Sergeants. He will pop inside and tell you in a
single breath to sweep the floor, lower the
windows, clean the tables, dress the beds,
empty the rubbish box, and pick up all the
straws, cigarette ends and matches you can see
outside, and then vanish like the wind. But
you have not served ten months in the
Featherbeds without acquiring the habits
of an old soldier, and you continue to smoke
in silence and study the latest reports about
the number of Russian prisoners in the hands
of the Germans.
Truly the orderly fatigue can't compare with
judging distances or studying Haking under the
fatherly care and guidance of the platoon
commander.
S. J.
.Drawn by
A Miss-adventure in Camp.
Pt,. SttwMt.
The peculiar thing about this climate is the fact
that the bhoys prefer milk and cake in the Y.M.C.A.
to beer and biscuits in the cante6m. Bella, horrida
bella.

136 THE OUTPOST.
I- A Day in the Life of a
Battalion Ordinary Private.
THE trials and tribulations of the Battalion
Orderly Corporal and Orderly Sergeant
have been enlarged upon in previous issues of
this Magazine, but no one has attempted to give
the outside world a description of the afflictions
a Battalion Ordinary Private has to undergo;
possibly for the simple reason that a detailed
account of the tasks performed by a simple
" Tommy " would necessitate the addition of at
least half-a-dozen pages to this periodical and
the elimination of the usual subject matter,
It is my intention, however, to attempt to give
a short account of some of the more familiar
daily operations of a Battalion Ordinary Private
in the r7th Service Battalion of the H.L.I.
The day's work starts about 5 a.m., when the
private anticipates what is known as " Reveille"
-'-:a row caused by the Orderly Bugler when
trying to free his instrument from bread crumbs
which have accumulated in it during the nightand
springs out of, or rather off, his straw and
beetle bed, and transports it, and his supply of
rugs outside his hut and proceeds to shake and
brush them for about ten minutes, after which
he folds them very systematically and takes
them inside again. He then engages in a
pugilistic encounter with his neighbour for the
possession of a brush, with which he proceeds
to sweep away all traces of dust and any
remaining beetles. This done, he fixes up his
bed in its app::>inted place, with the blankets on
top, and proceeds to wash the window behind
his bed, or scrub the tables in preparation for
breakfast. About this time "Reveille" goes,
but makes little difference to him, as the
call is only intended to warn the Non-Coms.
that they will require to get up within an hour.
He therefore finishes his scrubbing and then
proceeds to wash and shave, polish his equipment,
clean his rifle, and amuse himself trying
to rub the picture off his tunic buttons bv means
of "Brasso." When 6.45 a,m. approaches, he
walks smartly along to the parade ground,
rigged out in running costume and commences
to pick up papers and straws, and generallv
tidy up the ground till 6.55, when he falls-i~
for physical drill. If he be very lucky, and does
his" knees bend" well, he is dismissed after only
fifty minutes Swedish drill, and is at liberty to
proceed to his hut and draw his breakfast
rations, consisting of perhapsi~ OZ5. of cheese,
a basin containing three parts ginger-coloured
water and one pail sundries--sand, granitechips,
horse hair, etc.-and bread. The armv
allowance of cheese is, by the way, 2 ozs., but
this, of course, is subjected to the influences of
evaporation, Sergeants' Mess, etc. If a recruit
is very hungry he can sometimes manage to
eat all his allowance, but, as a geneml rule,
there is quite a quantity left over, which, of
course, looks well.
Hrs morning meal over, "Tommy" again
sweeps his hut, scrubs the tables and doubles
along to the parade ground to await the posting
of the markers for the 9.15 parade. About 9.25
the platoon commander arrives, tells off his
charge and starts to inspect it. in which operation
he is not at all particular. As long as a
man has all his buckles polished (Non-Coms,
tarnished), buttons, cap badge and boots
shining, hands clean, face newly shaven, rifle
approximately free from rust and pieces of cake
in the barrel, he is quite well pleased. When
the lieutenant has finished his round of
inspection, a few preliminary movements are
gone through, and the victim, accompanied by
his companions, is marched off to commence his
morning course of training.
This training, he is constantly informed, will
ultimately transform him into a soldier capable
of taking his place in the firing line, but the date
of that transformation seems to be repeatedly
postponed, and the training still goes on.
Squad drill, route-marching, skirmishing, and
so forth, all form part of the great scheme, but
shooting is practically neglected, and is only
engaged in when it is found that the ammunition
in stock is getting blue-mouldy. The forenoon
is spent, therefore, in one of the above mentioned
ways. and the mellow tones of the sub-lieutenants
drilling men, vie with the lark in creating
melodv! !
If the lieutenant is administering squad drill
to his platoon, he gives them a number of
commands-which he has just heard a sergeant
in another corner of the field giving-till he gets
his platoon jumbled into inextricable confusion,
when he says, "Now men, you must fall-in
much sharper than you are in the habit of
doing. Fallout-Fall-in!!!"
About II o'clock the officer feels very much
in need of a look at "the !lttlered book," so he
allows his men to fall out for five minutes for a
smoke. The volume having accomplished its
purpose, the platoon is permitted to fall-in
again, and the drill proceeds till dinner time,
Strangely enough, the Battalion always
enjoys a route march more than squad drill,
because when a route march takes place the
destination is often a beautiful estate, two or
three miles from anv town, and in this secluded
spot the men are ~allowed to gambol in the
summer sun, and regale themselves on " nectar
and ambrosia "-which is the polite name for'
frozen mutton sandwiches, and water-while the
officers go into the mansion house to look at the
pictures-perhaps.

THE OUTPOST,

138 THE OUTPOST.
Skirmishing is not quite so enjoyable as
route-marching, but as it is on the programme
it . must occasionally be carried out. As it
requires a Brigadier to understand the
principles of skirmishing, it would be hig~ly
inconsiderate to bore the average reader wIth
, an account of how it is carried out during
man~uvres.
To begin with, an impregnable position is
usually selected for an attack; the defence
consisting of a seven-pence-half-penny novel,
a sergeant-major, and a few squares of half-inch
flooring. No matter how strongly fortified
such a position may be, it can always be carried
by lunch time, so long as the Non-Corns. see
that their sections always double in "deadground"
and proceed at a leisurely pace when
under fire. During these attacks the rangeto
the nearest half-mile-is indicated by the
section commanders, and th;s is, of course, a
great help. To use the words of an enthusiastic
lance-corporal, " Skirmishing is both interesting
and instructive."
Unless the Battalion is engaged in routemarching
or field man~uvres, the dinner hour
is from about 12.45 till Z.IO. The dinner hour,
as well as the meal itself, is much appreciated,
because, after a sumptuous repast has been
disposed of, the hut can be swept out quite a
few times before next parade. Dinner consists
of any amount of roast beef and potatoes,
steak pie, or perhaps chicken, followed by a
dessert, consisting of sometimes as many as
three whole cubes of pine apple, an apple ring,
or say, a large helping of lovely bread pudding! !
Two o'clock finds the Battalion again on the
parade ground ready for afternoon parade.
Afternoon operations are frequently of the same
nature as those engaged in during the earlier
part of the day, but a Company may be
fortunate enough to secure the services of the
" Yellow Peril;" the nom de guerre of a
favourite physical-mson.

THE OUTPOST. 13\1
OF]:.thou has lured m ' lo deserted places,
l a gloam -blue mountains and dim league. of
pine,
W11ere wild-born Silence sanctifies the space ',
And every pa th is thine.
In. l;uman haunts I even hear your calling,
I hou draw'st me to thee, but thou will nol stay.
ln happy woods, where crystal floods are fallin'Y,
Thou tak'st my peacc away.
I hear lhy fool:;lCp .. echo hrough lhe gloaming,
Through moonlil gla c.leti and lege lld- ha un led vales;
I hear l hy pageantry a.lld rega.l roaming
Borne on th sum mcr gales.
1 feel thy presence in t he awful va lleys,
AJld lose thy furm WIthin a sudden mis l
When cloudy hos ts ·teer down t hei r phan lOlll
galleys
Through seas of amethyst.
L sce thy retinu of wood-folk follow
. . Thy mystic beauty o'cr t11C flowery lea;
I hy godh ke sp lendour issues irom the hollow,
It vealcd to all but me.
: urely thou wilt not hide thyself for ever;
·omeday. perhaps, benealb a purple hill
I'll fin d thee sea led by a quiet r iver,
Deep tuned to cleep, and still.
By c.ertain signs I'll know that I have found tllee­
An all-wi 'e pity in illu nortal eyes,
A ChriSl·lik sadLlc ' over and aroulld lltl!l',
Tlle air of acritice.
Then wi lt thou change m ' by thy lonely fuuntai ns,
The world forsaken all for love of thee.
That thou and I may roam the g lorjoll s~mou ntail1s
For all temily!
'.,V. J. F. H.
Cells and Inspiration.
HY, oh, wily do wc all find iL a ll at h em~L
W to undertak Gu~u-d duties while the
Battalion is busy drilling, or smoking c.igar -·ttes,
or maybe a ll asleep, wh n the time spent on
duties co uld be utilised for a far belt ' r object?
For in sl~nce , on Guard dut-y on i: (old a lot
about how t o carry a s illy gun , t.o m;m.:l! in
smart fashion, and if anything llllusuall1

140 THE OUTPOST.
A1inor, taken from german documents during
his confinement in prison in the kaiser's
fatherland. Owing to the present grave crisis,
only small letters are used in connection with
everything appertaining to the fatherland, as
capitals are to be abolished.
Charles the First, in prison at Holmsby,
wrote Eikon Bastike and The Royal Image,
addressed to his son; and again, John Bunyan
executed his masterpiece, Pilgrim's Progress,
while in durance vile.
So why is it that before anyone can gain
admittance to these special quarters, where all
the poetic thoughts and ideas can mature, one
ha~, of necessity, to go and get drunk or refuse
to get out of bed, or lose a rifle pull-through or
oil can. Surely someone in the know could
arrange free admittance and exit, and then
another name wi 11 be added to the famous
authors' roll, and, contributions to The Outpost
will go up a hundred per cent. in quality and
quantity.
C. W. L.
How We Recruited.
THE recruiting expedition, which was
embarked up::m by three members from
each Company, was a p3sthumous success-it
got recruits all right, but not during the campaign
week. Some of the experiences of one
member may be interesting, perhaps amusing.
On a certain Monday morning, seventeen
braw bhoys met at the Glasgow Chamber of
Commerce, the meeting being presided over by
our papa, Sergeant-Major Kelly, and a plan of
operations was decided on. \Ve received red,
white and blue recruiting ribbons for our
glengarries, and away we hied to our • beats.'
Two of us wended our way to the Students'
Union of the Royal Technical College, put in it
diplomatic half-hour at the billiard table there,
and, when a crowd of students had collected,
tactfully introduced the subject of our requiring
the best of stuff to fill up vacancies in the best of
Battalions. One sweet youth intimated his
desire to join a horsey corps, but when we
p3inted out the never ending fatigues consequent
on keeping a gee-gee in tip-top
condition, he succumbed to our seductive
arguments, expressed willingness to be one of us,
and so we escorted him to the Gallowgate and
saw him passed. So far so good. In the
afternoon we interviewed various picture
house managers, who very courteously condescended
to show an announcement on the
screen if we supplied the slide. We negotiated
terms for slides at a Sauchiehall Street optician,
and next morning we got the slides, which were
subsequently shown during the ensuing evenings
...r.~/
Drawn by
Pie. Slewart
Officer :-" On the whole, the day's operations were
fairly well done, but-there was far too much
paper and peel left lying about."
of that week. We also talked nicelv to the
manageresses of tea rooms and got ~them to
place our pamphlets on the tea tables, and if the
patriot bhoys missed an appeal so obvious,
brought under their very noses, then they were
blind, purblind and possessed high vacua in
their hearts, 'Ne trotted into restaurants,
pubs de luxe. coffee rooms and music halls, and
put forth the country's requirements to bland
youths who awaited the last trains home in the
Central, St. Enoch, and Queen Street Stations.
One morning three of us marched in column of
route to the Municipal Chambers and interviewed
the Town Clerk. We wanted carteblanche
to work through the various
departments of the Corporation's activities and
net the slackers, and he advised us to see the
Lord Provost. After wiShing us good luck, the
Town Clerk bade us good morning, handed
each of us a very excellent cigar, intimating
that the regulations precluded his offering us
a ' wee hauL' Next morning we called on the
Lord Provost and were ushered into the
presence in a preconceived precedence thus:­
The six-feet four man entered first, the six feet
one and a half next, then the six footer. Like
automatons we saluted as one man. The
Provost was impressed, jumped from his chair
resplendent in khaki, sword and spurs, and
ventured the opinion that we were fine fellows
and capable of stopping a bullet. He
animadverted on slackers in general, said that
some of the kidney were snug and safe at work
in the Municipal Buildings, and added that he
wished he had the power to give us permission
to take them by any handy part of their

. THE OUTPOST. 141
anatomy and bear them off to the attesting
officer, all of which we humbly seconded. He
gave us full permission to go through the many
offices, so we. brought up reinforcements,
worked round the fta.nks, made frontal attacks,
enfiladed the coves, drove in their advance
defences, and ultimately left them without any
excuse for not joining the Army. Some have
done so, most haven't! Of Cllurse we presented
the rosy side only, and said nothmg about
having to be in quarters at 9.30 p.m., and C.B.
for naughty boys-for, you see, some boys are
naughty congen,tally, and can't help it. It's a
gift.* Another day we lunched with the City
Business Club in Sloan's Cafe in the Argyle
Arcade, and after a decent 'tuck in' the
chairman mentioned the apparent fact that
they had the hcmour of having as guests two of
the' Saintly Third!' He asked the members
to put our requirements before their friends and
employees, and we received cards from several
gentlemen with the invitation to look up their
staff and try our luck, all of which we did. It
w.iLS dry ~ork. My word, the ladies! We
could have raised an Amazon corps (no, not
amazin', Gerald) in twenty-fllur hours. Britain
is. all right-the women have the heart, even if
some mere males haven't. After a really
strenuous week in stations, offices, sales,
theatre ·queues, and so forth, we returned to
Troon and were packed off to Prees, and each
night we view the Orders to count up the
recruits who are still coming in, undoubtedly due
to our giving the Battalion the best advertisement
p;)ssible in Glasg0w and environs.
l' l'
t
Fremshan Ponds, near Aldershot.
June 24th, I914.
H ere I lie on a rounded hill top, underneath a
spreading tree,
Such a wide outlook over shining water, fringed
with brightest green,
And miles and miles of heather, edged with pine
trees-
Overhead, vast, splendid, rolling clouds and deepest
blue:
\Vild ducks and water fowl flighting across, coots
crying, larks singing, swifts shrilling.
On the near horizon sharp silhouettes of mounted
troops;
A1ld again, miles and miles of heather; and the
keen poignant scent of firs and heathland,
almost intoxicatillg-
Everywhere life and universal praise and deep
thanksgiving for such a glorious day-- .
And I lie out and give of heartfelt thanks to all the
Nature's praise of God, around me.
K. C.
'" Of course we agree with Kipling and Patrick
M'Gill that there is no crime in the New Army: as
one contributor to The Outpost has said, it is jllst
cussedness.
To H.I.M.
'lbe Kaiser's Bogey.
Dream no longer of conquest, nor drink to " The
Day,"
The strong men of our Empire are girt for the fray.
Put avarice, ambition, and anger aside;
They shall storm your grea t strongholds and humble
your pride.
\\,ith guilt and with shame you have covered your
name)
At your door lie a thousand dark deeds of ill fame,
Do not hope to evade them with flame and with
flood,
You shall pay for your rapine in treasure and blood.
Your fast.steaming ships have swept Scarborough
town,
Your vile submarines put our merchantmen down;
Like fierce birds ofill-omen your airShips o'erhead
Have made peaceful green valleys the home of the
dead.
Leash your savage grey wolves, sink in fear to the
knee,
Your foul submarine pirates recall from the sea;
And whistle your Zeppelin hawks from the air,
For the dread hour of doom, Iron Despot, prepare 1
In the east and the west stalwart freemen arise
To contend with the carrion they loathe and despise;
And the bold British legions shall rest not nor spare,
Till the grey wolf of Europe is run to his lair.
Your merciless bondsmen-a black-hearted band,
Like road-thieves shall hang in the grim Fatherland;
And you, coward prince and false prophet of sin,
Dethroned and dishonoured shall fall in Berlin.
Hence, hound to your kennel, and keep you your
place,
From the gaze of the world hide your ill-favoured
face,
The strong men of our Empire are girt for the fray,
Dream no longer of conquest, nor drink to " The
Day."
SPEAKER,

142 THE OUTP OST.
R.Q.-M.·S. Thomas Keith.
A
:tfAN o f remarkcLble facult y fur organisat ion
a nd posses.. in .... a ll th· q ua li ties that "0 10
mal- a good a nd pop ul ar n on-conllnissiuned
officer, H_egimcn tal lIa rter - i\l: ler - 'erg a n t
I( ilh is a. sold ier )[ \\ ho;.e li fe in the arm y m ucll
co ulrl b w ritten, Tlt S UC 'l!:_ of hi s m ili ta ry
career might be d terI1Iin d by the ma ny
recugnit ions uf hi s \\'Ortlt on which a l this
nl(Hn n L, "'heu h · is ,ti ll tU!; ' in th serv ic of
il i - (~ lIn tr ', i l is hi ~ privileg to Tcficci, bUl with
:J non-cum , held in s ucll lLigh es teem a nd so well
Imo\\, ll arcl
' l!'ner solos in sucb_ p l;tccs

THE OUTPOST.
143
8 players from the 16th and 17th Service Battalions
H.L.I., and the Lonsdales have been entered. The
system is Company eights drawn against one another,
each Company bats an hour, and the oJ1e scoring the
larger number of runs wins. The system may not
be productive of brilliant cricket, but it is certain
that some right good sport should be seen.
The first match in the competition was played on
Wednesday, 2nd June, at Whitchurch-C Company
VIII. of our Battalion played A Company VIII. of
the Lonsdales, and had a run·away victory, dispos.
ing of the Lonsdales for 17, and then leisurely
composing the good total of 75. C Company should
give a particularly good account of itself in the
competition, as they have a very strong batting side
comprising such well·known West of Scotland
players as Lieut. A. D. Laird, Pte. Waters,. Scott,
Whiteford and Gardmer, the last four bemg all
members of the well.known Paisley team, Kelburne.
Look out, boys, in the Battalion orders for Inter·
Battalion cricket matches, turn out and lend the
matches your support.
Since the Battalion has come to Prees Camp.
cricket, which we looked forward to
Cricket. while in Troon, has been started.
The cricket outfit, which was
presented to the Battalion. is an ideal one, and it is
to be hoped that the cricketing members of the
Battalion will take an interest in the game, and show
their appreciation of the gift by turning out to
practice and improving their game-all for the
benefit of, and to keep up, the sporting records of the
Battalion. ­
The Cricket Club at Whitchurch kindly granted
the use of their ground to the troops, and a large
number turned out on vVednesday, 26th May, for
net practice. On Saturday, 29th May, an XI.,
picked from the officers, N.C.O.'s and men of our
Battalion, played an XI. of the Lonsdales (IIth
Border Regiment). \Ve batted first, and after a
very weak start ran up the total of lo6-a fairly
good score considering the small amount of practice
the players have had. The Lonsdales made a very
good start and had 50 runs on for the first wicket.
After the separation was effected, wickets fell at
regular intervals, and the eighth wicket fell with 10
runs wanted to win. Amidst great excitement the
Lonsdales won a very fine sporting game. They
won because of their steady bowling, good fielding,
and good batting start; they were assisted also by
our careless batting and weak fielding-at least four
possible catches being dropped. Some of our
bowling was steady-espeCIally the bowhng of
Pte. M'Allan, D Company, and Pte. Thom, A Com.
pany, and some of it was very erratic-due possibly
to want of practice. The bright patches in our
innings were supplied by L..Cpl. Brodie, D Company,
who played very refined cricket for 25 runs, and
Pte. Whiteford, C Company, who hit merrily all
round the wicket for 45 runs-the top score of the
match. Captains Smith and Hogarth gave the
Lonsdales a very good start with a useful stand of
50 runs. Their cricket was very quiet, but very
useful.
A knock·out competition has been inauguratecl
by the Whitchurch Club. Company teams of
Owing to the weather, Association Football has
been on the wane lately. Since we
Association came to Prees we have seen a little
Football. of 'the Association game, however,
on the White Lion Meadow where
we of the 97th Infantry Brigade are encouraged to
disport ourselves of an evening. Our Battalion had
two fixtures on successive evenings, so it was
considered advisable to allow our reserve team to
maintain our reputation against the, 15th H.L.I.
The result was 2 goals each, and the game proved
very interesting, the sides being evenly matched.
On the following evening our best side took the
field against the Lonsdales, and the result of 7 goals
to 2 in our favour did not exaggerate our superiority.
The features of the game were the combination and
fine shooting of our fonvards. A Company's game
with A Company of the 2nd Glasgow was put off.
Our B Company played the formidable B Company
team of the 2nd Glasgow shortly after our arrival
at Prees. The game was very evenly contested, but
if anything, our team :-vere a little fortunate, in
securing a draw, no scorIng. On the same evemng
our C Company were opposed by the corresponding
Company of the 2nd Glasgow, and won very easily,
proving their superiority. This was the first match
in which C Company had trIed the players posted
from E Company, and with the new talent included,
C Company should be about the best soccer players
in the BrIgade. They contributed seven players to
the team which defeated the Lonsdales, and eight
to the reserve team which drew with'the Tramway.
men. D Company have still to play their game
with the corresponding Company of the 2nd Glasgow.
Their representatives in the Battalion team are still
showing great prowess.
* * *
At Gailes, the Depot Companies are still keen on
soccer, and several matches have been played.
E Company of ours defeated E Company of the
16th by 5 goals to nil, after a very one-sided gamp,
It is only fair to the losers, however, to say that
they had not their best team playing. So far the
Bantams have not been met, but a match between
them and our Depot is to be arranged soon,

144 THE TP
The Supernumerary L.-C.
H\
can t he unuoubted t al nt f the
upern UnlCrilry L a n rporals be best
utilised ?
By \ ay of ex n pI, I sh all m ntion it
case in p int. ]--, for man' wee' has been
nursing in 0 b eLn no a m oustache, and , at th e
halt s, I hav ' It llim IlI rtiv ly m easure the
ra. e of growth b r m a ns of j h bacl(-sigh of
his ri fle s howing t hat he is, in part at 1 w t ,
fn llowing t h ath'icc giv 11 by our tonsvr'al
expect i n. ti,e l'ebrumy Iss ue. No\\", is I t r igJl t
that this cn.refully n urtured growth h Lluld
remain unu i ul, as well as un rnam 'nt,Li ?
The a nswer is in the negative. T b p roducer
is a L a nce- orp oral, Sup rnumcrary. and hi
natural prl li die houkl b pres ed into the
service witilOut d eja\'. J:;o\\" some of ur
soldier:; are weak in . yesight, a nd ibey ha \if'
b een passed b y an o lcl -fru;llion d, ineifi. 'If'n f
m ethod. L tour above-lUentloned fn nd take
uI t he duties I :'In E. -Test r, ,vhich all es
h is so weil qua l.fi cl b ' l -at u re to aSSlmH~ .
T ile pr0 .edurc would be ;)..'l il) llol\' : Ne",
r ecruils t u b(" rl ra,nl up 1 0 pace' frum the ~ ye
Tester. At the orrl er: " 1 yard s
mous tach in Iront . grt z ! " ih
would-be 'old ier ''''ulllcl ' ~n tlIe face GLrefull\".
The co mma cl o uld t hen b made : "M~n
eein y the objl"ct in (ra nt, fa ll ut on the r ght
fia'1 k I "
All m en thus falling Ol! l woulll at. on e be
proved liars, a '1 ~l struck oH tll(' s tr n g ! h oL the
batt."tlio l1 'l cor . 11)' unfit to be a
mem ber of the 17th Service Bat talion H.!..l.,
• TO(]'S wn,'TlI C".C1.i L1yThirri.'
Th n c.:"t order would be : H , our paces
forward march 1 a n you di s­
h ngu islt til e obj 'c l iv e lIOW? "
ShOll1c1 t. he ans\\" rs be in the affim < li ve, and
if l he umpires apPJinted arc sat;s ited wilh th ir
v ' r:1.c.t1', th re naits w uld b cOfl nid red rt.!.
h aving Tst lass ' Y si ht. If the ubj t be
distjngu: hed at ~ paces, t he re rutt would b
p. cl as 2nd cl..!..';!>; if at :2 pace.' t he recru it
could not rlistinguish the mom;tach , then he
shou ld be rd used as fallin T come li p t t h e
standLlrd of thi "fin ' bo I I of men."
TON. ORTALnIS.
Chester.
OH,where is tit place that we all wanllo f!:
To sp nd a few hours and a bob or so ?
W ell I'll tell yotl now, i( you'd lik 10 know,
It's h ster.
JL sla nds Oll the banks o( thc river D ee,
rn vitingl)' c lling whenever wc 'r ' free;
And t hc bdies arcswc t, !;ci wet:n y ou and mc,
In he ler.
'We privat s ar learning the older we grow
Some t hi ngs in our liJe WC ongh In' t to know,
For a usterit), slips (mm the N , . .
In hest.er.
.\nd now i t would please mc if I had the p wer,
To . eek from the hap, w bose vo i e makes LI S COI,'cr,
What he wilisp ' rcd to M aud 'neath J ing Charl,'S'
lo\\'cr,
In hesler.
B ll tlhen" a ll do it . for make no mis1a k(',
The rnaiclc 11S"an;: willing. and a ll for Ollr sak
T ~ h t)\\ · U" 111

THE OUTPOST.
141)
WIT14· THE:. :DEPOT· COM~
, ''''" > ,;"
AT·CAIL[5~CAMP·
AYRS~IQE
Drarr.. by
Pt•• Rlrr.lt.

146 THE OUTPOST.
HE was just beginning to feel fed-up when,
after manv wearv davs, Whit-Monday
had arrived: lIe had' been blameless the
previous day, so extra drill had no horrors for
him and, in a sense, he was free. In the old,
sweet days he had been an artist and, since
enlisting, he had been hard hit. Had they not
taken his long, black locks, once the pride of his
studio, and were they not desecrating his home
in Chelsea by sending down " high heid yins "
for instruction? There was one thing, he had
felt the pinch before, and the Army menu,
therefore, did not trouble him. Perhaps in
your heart you pity th's poor blameless artist,
but he was as happy as ever. His chum, a
disciple of the Deadwood Dick faith, also
enjoyed the solitude of the wilds for the
digestion of his literature, so naturally thev
decided to live, at least for a day, the old
Bohemian life that the Army had robbed them
of. After a long stroll they came to the house
with the striped gable where, close by, could be
seen the lazy barge-horses pulling their burden
on the placid canal. Vandyke, the artist, was
unsettled; he was disappointed with the scene
and wished to be on the move again, but Dick,
his chum, would not go on, replying " No' ae
noo, and ye micht gie's peace tae finish ane
chapter." Wandering around, the artist met
an old woman who greeted him with the typical
English, "Foine day." "Och yis, ay tae be
surty, whatefter, ma guid wumman," replied
the Scot in his mother tongue (?) "You'll be
Scottish?" ventured the old dame. Dick.
seeing that a conversation was going on. came
over and was in time to hear that they had just
missed the treat of the season. The thought of
missing a 'treat' made them wild, and they
listened with open ears to her tale. She
informed them that the school children had just
left for a sail up the canal in a barge, and she
was sure that they would have been very
welcome. The two pals looked at one another,
then Dick swayed, clutched at Brown, missed
him, and fell to mother earth. The thought of
a slow-moving barge when he had been reading
and dreaming of air ships, submarines, etc.,
made him sick, and when his eyes opened his
only words were "Onward, onward!"
Vandyke was only too willing, and as an excuse
to the good lady for their hurried departure he
tendered the plea that his chum" Wis kin' 0'
licht abin the gravit," and required to be kept
walking, The real reason was that they
thought that in her English kindness she might
call the barge back again, for not far away the
horse could be seen grazing on the bank while
some of the children were trying to coax it to
move.
After a respectable tramp, the happy pair
came to an inn where an old horse was tied to
the door-post. The owner was evidently in
quenching his thirst. The horse caught the
artist's eye. "It wis jist lovely" in his
opinion, but Dick only remarked that he hoped
it was not going near the camp as they might
ask it to 'step inside.' Ten minutes later the
sketching was commenced, but the artist's
hand suddenly grew shaky. Footsteps were
heard pattering along the lane, and to a
practised listener, these could be detected as
those of a maiden. When she approached, the
wicked Dick had the temerity to introduce
himself, and inquired if she knew anything that
was sketchable in the district, anything nice,
in fact if she cared to oblige it would be a
pleasure to them. At this point there was the
usual hesitation, but it passed off as t)1e carter
called over to see if they were finished with
his gee-gee. The wily artist evidently had a fresh
inspiration to work on, as he answered back,
" Na, I've only ae leg tae draw." The horsey
man, not wishing to spoil the work of an artist,
obliged, with a wink of his eye, by going in for
another cider. Dick had still kept up the
conversation with the lady. "Ye'Jl be fair

THE OUTPOST. 147
bate," the artist could hear him say. "Will
ye no' hae' a bit 0' an airmy piece ?~"-The:only
sandwich he had brought.
" Oh, dear no," said the fair one, " it should
be I that should bring refreshment to you."
Being of an appreciative nature the two
Bohemians were only too grateful and accepted'
the offer with relished joy. The lady had
evidently heard of the Scots appetite as it
required more maidens to assist in the carrying.
"Guid criftens! you're no' ill again,"
muttered the artist to Dick.
" A'm dash shair an' am no'. A'm jist fair
flabbergasted. They're s;c bonnie lassies."
The luncheon was duly set out and paper
napkins given to the soldiers in case they would
spoil their good khaki, which is, of course, not
their own, but Government property.
There was plenty of tuck and fun, and, as the
feast proceeded Vandyke the artist in an
emotional voice proposed the toast "To the
(Bohemian) Day," which has never been drunk
in the annals of the armywith such unparalleled
enthusiasm.
The repast finished, the festivities which go
to make an enjoyable day were commenced.
" Ab, at last we have found our Bohemia,"
whispered Dick to the artist. "What matters
it noo tho' we're kept at Prees? I'll arrange a
gowf match for Saturday. 'We canna pairt
wi' sic freens."
" But I canna play," confided the artist to
Dick.
" Och ! man, I'm shalr ye've bin a' this time in
the airmy and ken that its no the chiel that does
a' the talking that does the wark, and you're a
gey guid blether."
Saturday came after an anxious time for the
artist, and at last the golf field was reached.
The partners were arranged and the game
commenced. Dick and his partner drove off
first. Dick had a mighty drive, but Brown
thought that if his partner were the same as
Dick's, he would not look so bad. Then came
the trying moment, Vandyke had to swipe it.
He did his best, but after Dick had taken the
sand out of his eyes, he remarked, " Awa' man,
you're no' trench digging ~ "
" Ah! weel," replied the artist, " Am thinking
that I had better be your cuddy I "
The partner who had heard a little Scots
before, thought she saw a joke.
It was now Vandyke's turn to play again, his
ball having only gone a few yards. His stroke
was a perfect beauty, in his opinion, but it went
right into the centre of the river.
" That's ae guid shot wasted," he remarked,
but on second thoughts he recognised that fate
had just intended it.
" I'll need my pairtner tae help me tae fish it
out," he said, and Dick nodded accordingly.
On the road, he forgot, as usual, what he had
gone for. Last day he had gone sketching and
returned with a blank page; to-day golfing,
and it had gone out of his mind. Altogether
his absentmindedness was terrible, but could
you blame him? He had left Troon only six
weeks, and this was Merrie England. .
W.S.
Drawn 63/
Pie. Slewa,l

148 THE OUTPOST.
A COMPANY.
WE brought our course of training at Troon to a
finish with a week's night work, and for
variety and determination it would be hard to beat.
A modest example of one night's work is shewn on
page 90 ante. The news of our transfer to our War
Station put us all on the qui vive, as so many goodbyes
had to be said, with its usual batch of promises
re corresponding. Will Troon ever forget the
departure of the first train load, as slowly 'we slid
away southward to somewhere in England? Well
done, fair maids, and we will shew that our featherbed
campaigning has not been derogatory to our
military efficiency. As we whirled along the banks
of the NUh, old Sol bade us farewell, slipping away
to the glorious west, we, plunging into the gloom of
Carronbridge TunneL Our journey was devoid of
anything exciting, and at 4 a.m., our railway journey
w'!s completed, leaving us a three miles' march to
our new' home: We wakened up Whitchurch with
our hearty songs, the name and fame of Scotia being
our commonest theme. A couple ofdays sufficed to
accustom us to our new surroundings, during which
time the Quartermaster's department fully justified
itself. We had to take up duties immediately,
making the necessary arrangements for the remainder's
coming. The following forenoon was
given over to shaving the Parade Ground, the
afternoon to diverse occupations.
Our energetic Non-Coms. procured a motor and
scouted on towards Market Drayton, circuiting
Hodnet on the return journey. Not even the most
modest example of a Dundonald Hill was within
view. Sunday's story' Out of Bounds' was most
appropriate, in fact quite the bus-i-ness. Commencing
on the following day, we entered a week's
study at Musketry, and, with the exception of Route
Marches are still hard at it. The aforesaid Non­
Corns. paid a hurried visit to Chester, Hawarden,
, Flint, also to Mold,' returning via Wrexham. At
Flint. one native. on being informed that we came
from Scotland, put the question, ' But what do you
do there? The drive, particularly through Wales,
was much appreciated. but, woe unto thee, Flint,
not a p---, no nothing. being open. The party. by
some called the • Keystone' Fire Brigade, arrived
safely at Hutdom. That name reminds me that
our Company deserve praise for their rapid turn-out
on the night of the fire alarm. What though one
was in pyjamas and heavy marching order, we were
all there in z! minutes. Our expectations of a
Zeppelin raid with an accompanying power(less)
house were not realised. Company 'shun. Captain
Neilson from our Company has been appointed to
the important position of Brigade Machine Gun
Officer, our Lieut. Gardner being officer in charge of
our section. \Ve are also proud of Sergt. \Vatson's
performance at Aldershot. Not only did he win his
cross-swords, the insignia of a first·class gymnastic
instructor. but he has been asked to join the
Aldershot staff. A valuable addition has been
made to our staff by the arrival of O.C. Muscles,
Staff Sergeant Shuttle. whom I am sure is remembered
by all. Sticking our opponents whilst
standing on our head will soon be as child's play to
us. Rumour as to our departure is of course as
varied as ever, our destination being named the
Dardanelles, per York. \Vhy not ask everyone
where he desires to go ?
t t t
B COMPANY.
THE transfer to our ranks of a large contingent
from E Company prior to departure from
Troon forms one of the most important events in
the history of the Company. We welcome in our
midst those who were formerly members of B
Company. notably Sergeants Lang and Cameron.
We feel confident the new members of B Company
will work hard and earnestly to preserve the high
morale and efficiency which B Company has hitherto
enjoyed.
That we have so quietly settled down to the new
conditions of life in PreesCamp is doubtless partly
due to our adaptability and partly to the experience
gained in Camp at Gailes. It is gratifying to
observe that as in their tents at Gailes so in their
huts at Prees, B Company can still set a model, and
it must be a source of satisfaction to all ranks that
their huts have been so favourably commented upon.
It rests with every member to ensure that the
reputation gained is maintained in this. one of the
most important essentials in camp life, which more
than anything contributes to the health and
comfort of all concerned.
Since our advent to Prees our training has
consisted principally of Musketry and Route
Marching, but we look forward to resuming field
manceuvres at an early date. Our C.S.M. has been
indefatigable in Musketry, and the result of his
labours already shows in improvement in the
handling of the rifle. Sergeant Shuttle's welcome
reappearance will add variety to our work, and
enable us to improve on our bayonet fighting.
The members of B Company training with the
Machine Gun Sections include Sergeant S. D. Reith,
our senior Platoon Sergeant, Corpl. Parker and
others, who have done good work in the Company
since its formation. Should they be permanently
attached, as seems probable, it will be a distinct loss
to the Company, but we feel assured they will give
a good account of themselves with the Machine
Gun Section.
Lieut. F. D. Morton has returned to Gailes to
resume post of second in command of E Company.
Lieut. R. Scott is posted Commander of ::-ro. 8
Platoon vice Lieut. Morton, and Lieut. \V. Alexander
from E Company posted to No. 7 Platoon vice Lieut.
Scott.
Lieut. Begg has returned from a three wetks'
Gymnasia Course at Aldershot, and we have to congratulate
him on his appointment as Instructor of
Physical Drill and Bayonet Fighting to the Brigade.
We are glad to welcome Sergt. Cohen home again
after a strenuous general course at Chelsea Barracks.

,­
Further, seventeen members of B Company have
departed to take up Commissions, viz.: Sergt.
A. C. Baxter, L..Corpls. A. G. Marshall and A. S.
EIsworth. Privates J. Cowan, E. P. Rutherford,
E . .H. N. Stroud, A. W. Stroud, H. B. Taylor,
J, Hamilton, G. G. Henderson, J. L. M'Connell,
D. G. Younger, G. B. Walker, J. W. Fraser, W. A.
Herron, E. Dobson, J. N. Carpenter.
. Since leaving Troon our sports have been some·
what restricted. Football is on the wane owing to
warmer weather, but a few evening Inter.Company
Matches have been played. B Company did well
to draw their match with the formidable D Company
XI., of the 16th Service Battalion H.L.I., reckoned
to be the strongest Company team in the Brigade.
A satisfactory start was made with cricket
practice in the last week of May, on the gronnd
kindly lent by the \\'hitchurch Club. The Battalion
is fortunate in being splendidlv equipped with
cricket material, and each Company has been able
to carry out net practice independently. In the
first round of the Brigade Inter·Company Knock·out
Competition, B Company have drawn a bye. From
the form shown at the nets the Company should be
able to put quite a good XI. in the field.
C COMPANY.
IT is probable that in this number, all the talk
will be about our change of address. \Vell, so
far as C Company are concerned, we, in every sense
of the saying, have made onrselves at home.
Incidentally, it would seem that our conquests of
the fair sex already reach as far afield as Chester,
Shrewsbury, and even more remote places. Of
course this may be a very perverted view of making
oneself at home!
Paradoxically, we are glad and sorry to make
reference to Captain ~eilson, whose coming to the
Company the other week was hailed with joy. As
we write, alas, orders have it that he is no longer
connected with C. 'Well! well! after all, this is a
world of meetings and partings, joys and sorrows,
and we can only stifle our regrets to extend hearty
congratulations to the Captain on his appointment
to the important position of Brigade Machine Gun
Company Commander. The writer, with other
members of the Company has had personal contact
with Captain ~eilson in regimental matters, and
much admired the zealous manner in which he
interested himself in our Company affairs right from
the beginning of his appointment as second in
command. We shall watch his progress in his new
appointment with very great interest.
By the way, talking of appointments, C Company
furnishes more duties than any other Company in
the battalion. To brieflv enumerate these
Sergt. M. Drummond, in charge of the rifle range;
Bugle.Major W. Paterson; Signaller Sergt. H. W.
Duffus; Pioneer Sergt. W. Beck; Provost Sergt.
P. D. \Vatson; Master Shoemaker Sergt. J.
M'Intyre; L.-Corpl. J. S. Anderson, Postman;
several Battalion signallers, pipers, drnmmers,
buglers, storemen, etc., who are always employed on
Battalion duties.
Several aquatic members of the Company are
bemoaning the fact of there being no seashore here,
whereon to disport themselves, bnt it is a consola.
THE OUTPOST. 149
tion to know that there is a little drop of fresh water,
in which one may continue to imitate the lower
amphibious creation, a short distance away in an
" E. by N.E." direction. This for the benefit of
those who" know" their compass. \Ve indulge in
all sports; could we not now form a water polo team,
which game would be appreciably cooler than dry.
land football in this airless country? How we all
sigh for the ozone again' but like good soldiers we
settle down wherever powers that be care to
place us.
In common with other Companies, we shall be
glad when the other rifles arrive. Indeed, it will be
a day of great rejoicing, for we have several" shots"
who are positively dying to make a few" possibles "
on the target preparatory to coming in contact with
the Hun.
\Vhen we came here it was expected that there
would be some variation in our training, but,
unfortunately, the lie of the land does not afford
much facility for any new departures. Here again,
however, we rest contented. It is quite a good
thing to attain absolute proficiency in all drill,
loading, bayonet·fighting, visual training, etc., and
route marches in the surrounding country are
proving a mental feast, as well as highly beneficial to
the muscles. Also, there is the joy of anticipation
whilst on the march, of that refreshing spray bath,
which seems to make camp life twice as easy. In
the old camp days, the only spray bath was a pail
of cold water emptied over the back, as one stood in
a state of nudity in some corner, dreading, yet
hoping to receive it.
It is very gratifying to notice how the sick parade
has dwindled down to very small numbers, which
goes to prove that the Battalion is daily improving
in hardiness and endurance.
In conclusion, we must say that we like Prees, but
we wonder--, ah, we wonder, what will be the
outcome of the many rumours which are flying
around.
D COMPANY.
THE past month has been rather lacking in
events of any great interest, with the exception
of the move to our present station. The send.
off that the Company got will live long in the
memory of most of for more reasons than one.
Considering that we been running about Troon
all day saying good.bye to our many friends, and
also that we were all in the last train, the manner in
which the Company left the Esplanade for the last
time was very creditable. The scene at the station
will not be easily forgotten. After practically
fighting our way through the crowds round the
entrance we found the platform illuminated here
and there with acetylene flares, which gave every.
thing a rather weird aspect. At last Major Paul
had seen everybody safely aboard, and the train
moved out of the station. \Vho will ever forget the
lines of ghostly faces, the waving handkerchiefs,
and the ringing cheers which we echoed in cheers of
our own. Truly Troon did us well.
Like the other Companies in the Battalion, we
settled down to the new life very quickly, and
opinion is unanimous that the huts are very
comfortable. The distance of the camp from any

150 THE OUTPOST.
large centre is rather unfortunate, but this seems to
be no obstacle in the path of our budding Don
Juans, judging from the regularity with which
their names appear on the list of passes.
:\ month or so ago we prophesied concerning our
late second in command, Captain Neilson, but we
never anticipated such an early fulfilment. In the
words of Brigade Orders, Captain Neilson obtained
a certificate of specially high standard in the
Machine Gun Course, and we would like til add
D Company's congratulations to the many he has
already received. Corpl. Ellery is back from
Aldershot with all the latest ideas in Swedish Drill,
and is Sergt. Shuttle's right hand man, thereby
adding more glory to the Company, and at the same
time some lovely beaten brass work to the sleeve of
his tunic.
Every member of the Company, and No. 14
Platoon in particular, were exceedingly sorry to
hear about the accident which happened to Mr.
Gallie, in being kicked by a horse. It might have
been very much worse, and he was fortunate in
escaping so lightly. Mr. Gallie is at present on
leave and we wish him a speedy recovery, and hope
to see him back at Prees soon.
The departure of the Battalion from Troon was
marred by an unfortunate drowning accident which
took place the day before we left, resulting in the
death of Pte. D. M. M'Kenzie. The circumstances
were particularly sad as Pte. M'Kenzie was going
on furlough on the afternoon that he met his death.
He remarked to some of his chums in the billet that
he was going for a last bathe in Troon and it is
presumed that in diving from the springboard he
struck the bottom, as he was a strong swimmer.
The incident cast a gloom over the Company, and
over the whole Battalion. The funeral procession,
with military honours, from the Parish Church to
the station, was a most impressive sight, and was
witnessed by a large number of the public. Pte.
M'Kenzie was of a very bright disposition, and his
loss is deeply felt particularly amongst his own
chums. His remains were sent to his native place,
Bonar-Bridge, Sutherlandshire, for interment.
Athletics have been rather neglected lately, but
we will soon settle down to the old way of working.
In the Battalion team which defeated the Lonsdales,
we had three representatives, Sergt. Turnbull,
Sergt. M'Andrew and L.-Corpl. Roberts. Cricket
has made a good start, judging from the number of
enthusiasts who adjourn to Whitchurch on sports
day to have a game on the fine ground, kindly lent
by the "\Vhitchurch C.C. There are rumours of
boxing and wrestling matches, and the outcome is
awaited with great interest.
There is a story going the round of the Company
just now which will bear re-telling here. One day
recently a platoon was engaged in that most
exhilarating pastime, "judging distance," under its
Platoon Commander, arid under the watchful eye
of the Major. The Platoon Commander had placed
five men out at various distances partially concealed,
and was taking each man in turn to spot them.
After having one or two men out, the Platoon
Commander came to one man who could see four.
" Well," he said, " which is the one you can't see."
This takes the biscuit, and beats the yarn about
fixed bayonets at the trail, into a cocked hat.
E COMPANY.
GAILES, 31st May, 1

THE OUTPOST.
Hn
stones from the parade ground, some passers by
mistook us for the" Bantams."
Bathing parades have been quite numerous,
t.hanks to the fine weather. It was a fine to
see our stalwarts route.marching seawards the
hope of reaching swimming depth, The proximity
of the sea is one of the great advantages of the camp,
and the remark was frequently heard, " wouldn't
the hoys at Prees enjoy this? "
Physical Drill has become more lively at Gailes.
and no one has yet heen seen sleeping during this
parade, The ohstacles in the camp consisting of
jumping and vaulting beams, an inclined plank
leading to a narrow six foot jumping board, a ditch
for the hroad jump, and a ten foot wooden walI
enabled us to vary the old familiar exercises.
Surmounting the wall is perhaps our strongest point,
and it is rumoured the police suspect the Company
of harbouring some expert cracksmen and prison
breakers, in view of our adeptness.
Some special training has been given the XC.O.'s
in hayonet. fighting, etc. They also had the
privilege of attending several lectures to the officers.
which were both instructive and interesting.
Unfortunately, one or two N.C.O.'s fell asleep and
thus missed learning many valuahle points about
military law.
Recruits have not been coming down to join us as
rapidly as is necessary if our Company is to reach
its establishment soon, but the efforts of Sergts.
'Vattie and Thomson and Corp!. Tait, who were on
recruiting duty in Glasgow, will, it is hoped, result
in substantial progress being made, It is understood
that a number of other N.C.O.'s are not averse
to a week's recruiting duty in Glasgow! However,
the additions to our ranks are all good fellows, and
we have done our best to make them welcome.
So far the sport which has received the largest
number of devotees is soccer, and already a Hut
league is under way. Only preliminary matches
have been played, but to·morrow will see the ball
open in the true sense. To prove that the N.C.O.'s
are by no mean;; a spent force, a match was played
between them and the Officers. The latter appeared
to have more knowledge of" rugge'r " than" soccer"
and through the inability of some were heaten quite
easily hy 5 goals to nil. For the losers Lieu!. Orr
played quite a forceful game, as no doubt a few of
the N.C.O.'s can prove, and in the second half
provided some good runs on the wing. For the
winners, Sergt. Wattie was one of the stars, and
completely bottled up the left wing of the opposi.
tion, while CarpI. Mackay at left back proved that
his knowledge of the game is by no means that of a
juvenile. Sergt, M'Taggart and Corpl. Harvie
made an excellent right wing, and some very pretty
combination resulted between the two. The latter
accounted for no fewer than 4 of the goals. while
the former in his eagerness to score placed a corner
kick beautifully between the posts, hut as nobody
touched the ball, the goal was rightly disallowed.
Full advantage is being taken of the facilitie5
offered for golf, and the Dundonald Course is very
much in favour, So far no matches have been
arranged, but there is some talk of the N.C.O.'~
giving the Officers an opportunity of reversing the
result of the football match, Perhaps in the next
issue we may be able to publish the result of such a
game.
Draw" by
ROUTE MARCH IMPRESSIONS-SHROPSHIRE.
Pt., rh.m••n.

2 T H E OUTP S .
Su b·Editorial.
.\(le r our being in h\1t ~ i ll l'r cc' H a Ul fo r
Inarcbing at 'Pr 'R.
J. '. H.

THE OUTPOST.
~ 1111 11111111111111111 JIJIIIIIl H11111111 HIIIIIIIII IIJlIfIII 11 11 1111 11 11 11111111111"1111111111111111111111111
-
=­
~u('VgtE ~i\lYJ\l~e~ HeLJe
MAGAIiWt
No. 6. JULY. 1915.
CAMP life in Wensley undoubtedly has its
ups and downs, but for the present is
welcomed as a change from our "Flat"
existence at Prees. We understand that
"Housemaid's knee" is now entirely absent
from the dally sick report. .
Much as we appreciate the beauties of the
surrounding country, a~d realise the facilities
for enjoyment afforded to mountaineering
enthusiasts, still more would we appreciate the
proximity of a Chester, a Shrewsbury, or a
LiverpQol-to name a few of our favourite
week-end haunts,-and if the inquisitive private
who took the trouble to look over the postmarks
of the letters the other day speaks the truth,
our visits were not in vain. But why worry
about the shortage of "talent" in the
surrounding villages-or to be more correct,
hamlets-when each Company has its own
lines in camp.
Life under canvas was a little strange at first,
but even the guys soon got to know the ropes.
This is really essential, as lights are not allowed
after IQ.I5 p.m., and men on late
esp'ecially if they have had a peg or
would otherwise find it difficult to reach their
sleeping qnarters without having a rest on the
way.
We are sleeping twelve in a tent, but this
gives us no cause to grumble, as ,we have all
become very close friends in consequence. One
lance-corporal was heard to say that in his
Yorkshire Relish.
Itent they were so closely packed, that when, on
, a very cold night, one man put on an extra
semmit, it was noticed at once. This may be an
exaggeration, but it is an undoubted fact, that
in spite of the sobriety of our Battalion, we are
rather tight just now. Further proof of this
may be had from the number of registered
letters which our PQstman brings daily. We
hope that no man will be unable to take
advantage of the liberal week-ends which we
are getting just now, through not having the
opportunity to put his autograph in the receipt
book in the Guard tent.
We understand that every man is being
served out with two false faces. Although
some of the real faces are not all that could be
desired, this has nothing to do with the issue,
nor are they to be used as disguises for men
who wish to remain incog. No, they are to be
worn on the march, one on each side of the head,
but only when going from camp in the \Vensley
Station direction, and may be removed
immediately on the command ,; March at ease."
Trench d'igging was entirely absent from onr
p;',)gramme while at .Prees, but since our advent
h"re it has been given more attention. Th's;s
u:"doubtedly one of the most important phases
in our military training, and much may be
learned from a visit to the admirable trcr.ches
which have been dug in the rear of our camp.
They give us a slight impression of \\ hat our
" digs" may be like at the Front.

lIit
THE OUTPOST.
In spite of all we hear to the contrary, we
have come to the conclusion that the feeding
here is excellent. Had it not been, we hardly
think the two ravens which have been added to
our list of regimental pets would have stayed
with us so long, but some men must have their
grouse or they are not satisfied; still, though
often hungry, we are never ravenous.
The issue of the short rifles to the N.C.O.s has
given all-round satisfaction. The privates are
delighted to see the N.C.O.s doing the little bit
of extra work which the cleaning of this toy
necessitates, and the N.C.O.s are pleased
because they have something which, for the
present, the privates have not. They are
certainly looking a little worried and run down,
no doubt due to the responsibility which the
care of this weapon has placed on their
shoulders, but we hope they will pull through.
The system, on guard-mounting, of picking
out the three c1eanest men for stable guard-a
duty which only comes at retreat and allows
the men to be free all day-is an excellent one,
as it brings the men up to the scratch, and with
so many other battalions passing us daily, it is
up to us to see that our guards are presentable.
Since we arrived in camp there has been a
fresh outbreak of Rumouratism, a disease which
was very little heard of until it was found to
have broken out in Kitchener's Army. .
Our Battalion has suffered much from this
ailment, the epidelYJic first reaching us at Gailes
about the time we all had such bad fits of the
blues, and has been 'with us in varying degrees
ever since. The forms which this disease takes
are numerous; some are quite mild and require
very little attention, but others are very severe
and difficult to get rid of. As was practically
general throughout the country, we were first
infected with" Huts," a very mild form which
was quickly followed by one ~f the most deadlv,
namely, "Billets." Only our immediate
removal to Troon saved us, and there we were
quickly nursed back practically to our normal
state of health. Even there we had many
relapses; "France," "Egypt," and "South
Africa," all giving trouble. "France" has
proved the most troublesome and is continually
breaking out afresh. Little attention has been
paid to this form of the disease in spite of its
continual recurrence. This is no doubt due to
the fact that it passes from the patient so
quickly and doesn't leave any dregs. \Ve are
of opinion that a careful eye should be kept on
Rumouratism in this form, as some day it may
get a grip of us, and we may be taken away
before we realise it.
There was only a slight outbreak of " Egypt"
in Troon. Most of the patients were found to be
billeted quite near the Sergeants' quarters.
This led to an enquiry, and the source of the
trouble was found to be two pith helmets which,
on investigation, were found to belong to the
billeter. They were not samples, as was at first
suspected.
The" South Africa" epidemic was one which
would never had troubled us but for a talkative
and irresponsible private who found his way
into the Orderly Room. He came across a letter
with a South African post-mark on it, and, as it
was addressed to the Orderly Room, that was
enough for him. We need not dwell on the
trouble which he carried for days; sufficient
to say that it was only a letter from an aunt to
one of the Orderly Room clerks.
Such is the trouble which we experienced
while in Troon. Frees found us apparently
cured, and it was thought that our troubles
were at an end, but we had one slight relapse
which almost necessitated our removal to a
Yorkshire watering place. However, we were
not seriously affected, and we got our clean bill
of health without resorting to any such
unpleasant (2) cure.
We are now at Wensley and there has been
a fresh epidemic compared with which all our
previous attacks were as nothing. "India"
has raged throughout the camp for over a week
now, and all efforts of the medical profession
to stamp it out have been in vain. The disease
has not confined itself to the camp, but has
spread to Glasgow where thousands of the
popUlation have been infected. There is some
doubt as to whether the germs have been carried
in the letters from Glasgow to \Vensley or viceversa.
Although we have been unable to carry
out investigations in Glasgow we have done our
best here. A thorough search has only brought
one clue to light. The first patient on being
examined admitted that while crawling round
The Outpost tent he had overheard the editor
say something about India, and he immediately
got the impression that the Colonel had
given him some inside information, and, as
everyone knows, all news in The Outpost is
authentic. On questior:ing the editor he, with
difficulty, remembered having said something
about getting more Indian ink for the artists,
or it may have been India-rubber bands for the
Finance 2'vfanager's accounts. In any case he
pleads "Not guilty." We are ir:clined to
believe that Glasgow is responsible.
For our part we are heartily 'fed up , with
Rumouratism, and everybody admits that something
must be done to rid us of this malady.
\Ve understand that the First Army have
found a most effective cure, but in spite of our
suffering they refuse to yield the secret. We
have every hope of stumbling across it for
ourselves shortly, but, in the meantime we
suppose we shall have to snffer in silence.
APEX.

THE OUTPOST. 155
P.T.GOD
OF ISCOYD.
I AM one of those nearly extinct relics of a
bygone age, namely, a retired Volunteer
Adjutant; and my hobby is a keen desire to
get to understand how the English race came
to establish itself in the British Isles, as far west
as a line from Exeter to Edinburgh, to the
temporary exclusion of our Welsh and Gaelic
friends, and the permanent abolition of their
language, customs and place-names east of that
line. From my profession and training I have
naturally approached this question from the
military standpoint, and I find everything
explained, and from Hengist and Horsa down to
the founder of Edinburgh, a coherent and lucid
story evolves itself. This story may not be in
accordance with the patchwork of literary
quotations which University professors have
made to pass muster as history, but at anyrate
it is coherent, which is more than can be said of
more academical versions.
The most interesting feature of the neighbourhood
of Whitchurch is that it contains the
frontier where this great conquest was first
permanently checked, and that is why we find
Wales and Welsh names within three miles of
Whitchurch, and we shall see that, as we are
dealing with the vestiges of a conquest, military
science explains everything. Though there is
evidence that the site of \Vhitchurch was
occupied in Roman times, I have not space to
deal with that period beyond pointing out that
it lay near the route by which the Romans must
have travelled from Uriconium on the Severn to
Chester, their great fortress on the Dee.
Near Whitchurch more districts or territorial
divisions meet at one point than anywhere else in
the world. Where Judbrook and Grindley Brook
join the Wych Brook we find meeting, 2 Countries
-England and Wales, 3 Counties-Shropshire,
Cheshire and Flintshire, 2 Dioceses-Lichfield
a::ld Chester (in fact there will be 3 if the Welsh
Church Bill ever becomes law, since that will
put Iscoyd into St. Asaph), 2 Provinces-Canterbury
and York, 3 Hundreds-East Bradford,
Broxton and Maelor, 3 parishes, 3 townships,
3 properties, 3 farms, 3 brooks, etc., etc. Any
one of the first eighteen of these names might
head a chapter on national history, as the rest
might on locaL How has it come about that
so many divisions of sterling historical interest
meet at such a quiet and unassuming spot in a
pastoral district, and so many vestiges of
ancient conflicts in such an abode of peace?
Local people who see these topograph:cal
phenomena everyday cannot be expected to
take an interest in the questions they raise; in
fact 1 don't want them to, as they are far too
busy making cheese, without which we should
not get our rents, and, besides, we all wish the
neighbourhood of Whitchurch to retain the
position it holds as, facile princeps, the premier
cheese district of the world.
But r have some hopes that our local
arch

156 THE OUTPOST.
LLANGOLLEN.
dis 'barges, a nd then pa. ses thro ugh a deep
gu rge un til it ha ' passed Overton ,Lnd th n 11 011 s
northwa rds to he:ter a nd so by its estuary to
the sea.
Bnt, t u return to Whitchurch. It is evident
t ha t th great a rch

THE OUTPOST.
157
established by the Saxon conquest of the
::VIidlands. Prees Heath was too barren a spot
to interest the invaders of those days, but it
was probably from Tilstock that they drove the
Welsh back on to the Fenns ::\foss. The invaders
have left relics of the presence of the Welsh in
such names as Welshampton, and Whixall,
Welsh End and Cumberland Farm, which has
the same meaning as the county (i.e., the land of
the Cymri),
Men whu come from parts of Scotland where
the Lowlands meet the Highlands, and also
those who come from the Border, 'may be
interested to see how the same kind of border
questions affected us here, on the \Velsh border,
as those which so largely make up the history
of Scotland.
t t t
Our K-nuts.
WE are fairly going the pace,
Don't cher know,
Everywhere we hold the ace,
Don't cher know.
\Vhile we learn to hold a gun
We are experts everyone
\Vhen it comes to having fun,
Don't cher know.
There are amongst our ranks,
Don't cher know,
Some awfully jolly swanks,
Don't cher know.
At Chestah vou would evah
Find them boating on the rivah,
For they're beastly awfully c1evah,
Don't cher know.
Fine Body 0' Men.
WHEN new to Government control,
And feeling fairly" up the pole,"
""'hat words braced up my shrinking soul?
" Fine body 0' men I "
\\'hen, drawing stores, I said I had
Full twenty fellows in my .. squad,"
Who said-" Nineteen, my lucky lad" ?
.. Fine body 0' men."
Who said, when we to Nap sat down,
.. I'm simple, but I'll ha'e a roun',"
Then took away my last half·crown ?
" Fine body 0' men,"
And when, freed from aJl earthly things,
Peter, for us, his gate wide
""'ho then will issue harps and
Probably" Fine body 0' men.
A. K.
The' Glengarry,' it of course,
Don't cher know,
Has magnetic lines of force,
Don't cher know.
Though the bonnet adds its grace,
Still you always need a trace
Of a pleasant smiling face,
Don't cher know.
V...110 would ever dare deny,
Don't cher know,
That the gallant H.L.I.,
Don't cher know,
Are a manly·looking throng,
And in good looks pretty strong,
To Adonis they belong,
Don't cher know.
I don't wish to boast or brag,
Don't cher know,
For it's such a beastly fag,
Don't cher know.
If you don't believe my tale
Ask at \\-11itchurch without fail,
Or the girls (?) at Wensleydale,
Don't cher know. J. B.
f)rawn b;
" I think I'll try this brush now! "
Pit. Slewarl.

158 THE OUTPOST.
BATTAL ION NOTES.
J UT~Y fi n d ~ u. s IUe,1 down in \\'en.

THE OUTPOST. 1;:;9
PI•. N O" ,.,lo", PI • . Boolh , Pie. Dllnlop, Pie. M ',vair, Sergl. Duffu s.

160 THE OUTPOST.
Reviews 0/ Books.
The Sergeants' Cyclopcedia. By General
Swein von Hoggenheimer. (Published by the
German War Office, Paris-I.D.T.).
The fact that this work is from the pen of a
well-known General, formerly a sergeant in the
crack "Loot and Lust" Dragoons, whose
atrocities have made him a national hero in the
Beer Gare'ens of the Fatherland, is our sole
reason for noticing it in these columns. We are
afraid some copies of this abominable publication
have fallen into the hands of certain
British sergeants, but we venture to hope none
of them will attempt to put into practice the
drastic discipline described. At the same time,
it is only fair to the nation which has specialised
in militarism, to say that some of the plans
elaborated by the gallant Hun could profitably
be studied by non-coms. of our New Army. "Ve
annex a few quotations from chapter MCXIX.,
" How the sergeant may gain the respect of the
private." "
Never be civil to an inferior-rudeness costs
nothing.
If a private on any occasion offers you an
explanation, do not be afraid to call him
a prevaricator. Probably he, or some
other private, has deceived you on other
occasions.
Report privates as often as possible to your
company commander for punishmentthis
will make the officer think you are
an efficient disciplinarian.
Remember that a private has no soul~-the
latter is only originated after he receives
his first stripe.
Ignore absolutely all privates when off
parade.
Endeavour to address the men in a raucous
tone-the correct tone may be cultivated
by imitating the barking of a dog.
These excerpts will give our readers a general
idea of the nature of the book. We understand
that no part of the profits from the sale
.of this work will be devoted to the Belgian
Relief Fund.
save himself many an extra drill. It is
undoubtedly a vade mecum which should be in
the bureau of every private.
God's Own Battalion. A novel by S. D. R.,
author of Outpost Duty. (The Outpost Office,
Wersley. Il!d.)
\Ve advise our readers to lose no time in
reading this delightful volume. Tbe book will
certainly enhance greatly the reputation of its
brillant and distinguished author. The theme
is a study of the career of Percy Vere de Vere,
the son of a Glasgow millionaire, who, during
the Great War, emigrates to the barren wilds
of Trocn and joins the 17th H.L.I.-whose
unofficial name gives the volume its title. The
story of the hero's rise from a humble private
to be Lance-Commander-in-Chief of the Allied
Armies, provides many thrilling moments; and
the description of his atJaire du coeur WIth the
Fishmonger's Assistant, a Duchess in disguise,
is one of the most charming love passages it has
been our good fortune to read.
Judging from the accurate descriptions vf
squad drill, and other intricate manreuvres, we
should say the author has himself had some
military experience.
This book should be an ideal Bible Clasf,
prize, although its language sometimes errs on
the vigorous side.
M.L.
The Private's Friend. By Lieut. A. Swank.
(Bass & Lager, Ltd., London, 4d.)
We expect a large demand for this most
useful pamphlet, copies of which may be
obtained at WeLsley Camp. The ingenious
author shows clearly how the private can
acquire in one week all the devices and subterfuges
of the old soldier. By studying this
invaluable work, one may avoid parades, turn
up late, neglect equipment, learn the art of
covert insolence, etc., and at the same time
Drawn by L•• Cor~/. Houslon.
A DRASTIC ORDER.
Ofticer~" Have all your Section shot yet?"
Sergeant··-" Yes, Sir ~ "
Ofticer~" Well, you can go and shoot yourself now!"

THE
TPOST.
l 11.1(' say Lhat Ca t;tai n LonglcgR
thought tha t l\ l,ejo r Demrot beli -vet! that Lieul.
Spark)' re i< oneLi th(lt CapLUin Cumhoil', groom h. d
told Clone! og ie's servan t thal he had h ea rd
Gusse ' sa' that ( 'S ' . bos' sa id Iha t \Vc wen ' likely
to re tu rn to hill.eb hI' the sea,
*
Cigare{ te,; don'r nd in , mol< ' in \\' cn. ley, bul in
]l'Lc k dnll. \\' ilat :t b astl y fag !
\Vhcn the I sraelites wcre on the rocl' as reg

162 THE OUTPOST.
EDITORIaL.
......,.
WENSLEY. JULY, 1915.
The spirit that only wants to be doing something is not a disciplined spirit: it is a veryul1disciplinecl spirit.
We ought all to be ready to do anything; but we ought also to be ready to do lIothing.--G. K. CHESTF.RTO~.
THIS, our sixth issue, completes the first
volume of The Outpost. In the production
of the July number we have just been
beginning to feel the inconveniences and
difficulties of publishing a .Magazine under active
service conditions. These circumstances are
not at all conducive to the concentration of
thought necessary for the production of literary
and artistic material of the high standard set by
our previous issues. In spite of the lack of
facilities, however, we anticipate no rlisappointment
on the part of our readers, for number six
is just as bright and interesting as any of its predecessors.
\Ve appreciate the patience and
self-denial which our contributors have put into
their work. Removed from the comparative
peace and quiet of billets and huddled now into
the small space of the regulation Army Bell
Tent, with noisy and perhaps unsympathetic
comrades, they have shown their perseverance
and ingenuity in turning out the very excellent
matter which composes this number. They
have thus assisted us to fulfil our object~" to
record, month by month, the various activities
of our life in the Army," for no better chronicle
of our doings could be produced than the
articles, poems, photographs and sketches that
appear on these pages, "mingling the serious
with the humorous in a happy-go-lucky,
indiscriminate way."
In our moves from station to station The
Outpost has gathered a lot of friends, and we
are proud to say we have been widening the
circle of our subscribers. So much is this the
case that" publishing day" is quite as much
looked forward to in Gailes, Troon, Prees,
,,7hitchurch and Market Dray'ion as it is in
Glasgow, and by the merits of this issue we
hope to add Leyburn and Middleham to that list.
Surprise will no doubt be felt by many, and
has, as a matter of fact, been expressed by some,
that we are still in a position to publish our
Magazine from a home station. This is quite
excusable, as in the early days of our training
we all fully expected to have taken a much more
prominent part in the hostilities long ere this.
\Ve realised later, however, that, having just
missed (by days, perhaps) inclusion in the first
few hundred thousands of the New Armies (for
so many units were receiving official recognition
at the one time), our entry to the actual field of
operations would naturally be p:>stponed for an
indefinite period. This fact was mainly respo::lsible
for the inauguration of The Outpost,
though it was not until February that we
persuaded ourselves that" this type of Magazine
could not merely exist on paying lines, but could
be made quite a literary success."
The Magazine has helped to sho\" the spirit
in which the members of the Battalion h.'we
taken the trials and tribulations of the arduous
months of training. The patriotism which
induced them to answer their CountrY's call for
men so promptly, has not dwindled,' and they
still have the same zeal for service which thev
felt when they were sworn in at the Technical
College soon 'after the outbreak of war. We
have declared on a former occasion that" we
try to collect and dispense as much as we can
of the lighter side of Army life," and it is a matter
for self congratulation to the member;; of the
Battalion that their Magazine is still able to
show to their friends the cheerful and goodspirited
manner in which they pursue their
present duties, which, to men of their character
and c01l1merci~.d training, must prove at times
irksome and monotonous. "Ve are still able
to embody in these pages all our comradeship,
cheerfulness and jollity of which we are so
justly proud.

THE OUTPOST,
163
Drawn by
"WE'LL FIGHT TO THE END."-Mr. Asquith.
Pts, Cnatmalt.

161 THE OUTPOST.
MARY QUEEN y
5COTS
VENc5Lc.1DA_~
TO us as Scotsmen it is interesting to know
that the broad and beautiful upland dale,
extending eastward and westward from our
present camping-ground, has been connected
with the life-storv of one of the most romantic
figures in British history, the lovely and
ill-starred :\lary, Queen of Scots.
Her enforced sojourn here began shortly after
that fatal morning of the 13th May, 1S68, when
, she stayed her steed upon a hill ' at Cathcart
Castle (not Crookston Castle, as Sir WaIter
Scott erroneously puts it). and saw her little
army melt away at Langside under thefterce
onslaught of the forces of her half-brother,
James Stewart, Earl of Moray.
Riding hard southwards, the Queen and her
meagre escort only drew bridle once, we are told,
when she halted for a few minutes to drink a
bowl of milk at a peasant's cot-house in the
Vale of Tarff.
After a brief stay at Dundrennan Abbey, she
passed over Solway Flow in a little boat from
Port Mary, in Kirkcudbrightshire, to Maryport
in Cumberla'ld, both towns taking their modern
names from the circumstance of her voyage.
. '. From here and from Carlisle Ha' the hapless
Queen sent to her royal cousin, Elizabeth of
England. that well-known pathetic message
which might have melted a heart of stone, but
had little effect on the adamantine nature of the
English Sovereign. Acting with the advice of
her astute and unscrupulous minister, Cecil,
Lord Burleigh, she first agreed to receive her
fugitive cousin, and then sent evasive replies to
Mary, but invited her southward, and thea
secretly consigned her to the charge of the
Warden of the Marches, Lord Scrope.
r', He conducted Queen Mary at once with
scant ceremony to his strong castle of Bolton,
which still rears its massive and time-shattered
walls above the vallev of the Yore, about three
miles west of the village of Wensley.
Here she remained with her faithful friend
the Lady Mary Carmichael, who had so bravely
held with her through all her vicissitudes. She
had a certain amount of liberty to move about
the castle grounds and neighbourhood, but
alwavs under strict and careful scrutinv. Often
must she have sighed and grieved at her lot as
the autumn and winter winds swept adown
I' Wensleydale, and the summit of Penhill across
the valley was wreathed in its misty mantle.
I Often must she have wondered why an unkind
fate had made her merely exchange one prison
I at Lochleven for another at Bolton Castle.
But when did the sight of beauty in distress
I fail to stir some gentle and chivalrous heart?
And just as that brave and resourceful youth,
I George Douglas, secured Queen Mary's release
from Lochleven Castle, so now another friend
I appeared, the young and susceptible Kit
Metcalfe, the second son of the Sheriff of the
North Riding, Sir Christopher :\fetcalfe of
Nappa Hall.
Whether stirred by the glamour of the
Queen's beauty or by the lovely Lady Mary,
tradition deponeth not, but the gallant lad
agreed to make an effort to aid them in the:r
wish to reach their friends in Scotland, and only
awaited a favourable opportunity.
The kindly Spring came round, and on a fine
evening in March, Kit had three palfreys ready
hidden in the village for the two ladies and a
serving-woman, as well as his own horse and
that of his faithful old forester, who was to act
as guide. The ladies slipped out quietly by the
postern gate, and the party mounted and rode
rapidly eastward towards \Vensley and Leyburn,
intending to reach BeUerby Hall, where the
Queen was to be kept quietly hidden for a time.
But the alarm was soon raised at Bolton
Castle, and Lord Scrope with his band of menat-arms
came thundering after.
The fugitives, however, would likely have
escaped in the gathering gloom, had not Queen
Mary refused to leave the serving-woman,
whose foot was sprained and bleeding through
the stumbling of her palfrey, just as they began
to breast the steep slope of the long limestone
escarpment that stretches from just n0rth of our
present camping-ground to Leyburn.

THE OUTPOST.
\Vhile the Queen was binding the woman's
foot, her mantle or shawl was laid on a bush
beside her, and when the party remounted, it
was forgotten and left behind. When the
pnrsuers arrived at the place, the tell-tale
shawl showed that the fug,tives had not held
to the lower ground, but had taken the upper
track along the top of the ridge.
They were soon overhauled, and Mary's
hopes of liberty were again shattered. ' Ever
since, the ridge has been called the Shawl Hill,
or, commonly, Leyburn Shawl, and the spot
where the fugitives were captured is still known
as the Queen's Gap.
Who can picture the sad thoughts of the
ill-fated Mary as the party slowly wended their
way back to Bolton Castle?
Soon after, Elizabeth and her counsellors
decided that Wenslevdale was too near Scotland
for Mary to be held in safe durance, and she was
shifted south from one place to another, until
at last she ended her weary nineteen years of
captivity on that raw, dark morning on the 8th
of February, I587, in the great hall of Fotheringay
Castle, in Northamptonshire. There as
her head rolled from the block under the axe of
the executioner, well might people forget her
weaknesses and mistakes in the sadness of her
hitter fate.
Admitted that Queen ~rary was not faultless
(who is? oh, ye smug pharisees), still, the mean,
jealous, treacherous, and vindictive treatment
meted out to her will a]wavs remain a dark
blot on the character of ~England's 'Good
Queen Bess.'
MARK DRUMMOND, Sergt.
DAWN broke; a gold-bespangled cloud
Toned the dull aznre of the sky,
Veiling obscurely, like a shroud,
The first fresh gaze of heaven's eye.
Peace reign'd, and all was undisturbed;
Nature lay unawakened still,
Save for the crooning of a bird,
Low·sweeping o'er the dew·touched hill.
Pausing, I listened to its note,
Re.echoing adown the vale;
The pathos of it seemed to float
The length and breadth of Wensleydale.
Richer and fuller did it swell,
Until in agony it broke,
'And then I knew, as in a spell,
These were the magic words it spoke:
" Unhappy vale of "Wensleydale,
My spirit haunts these fateful spots;
The shape is of a nightingale
The soul is Mary, Queen of Scots! "
J. L. H.
Pipers.
"WELL, boys, thur p'P8S 0' mine are gaun
like bees this mor,lin', and I'm feeHn' in
the best 0' form."
\Vhen we hear these remarks from our highly
respected Pipe ~rajor on the morning of a ruute
march day, while we are having the tuning of
our pipes seen to, we look at one another and
feel our hearts sink to zero, for in these hot days,
when' Pipey , is in form we know we are in for
some long spells of blowing, and will be pretty
well ' wabbit I by the time we get through with
Scotland the Brave .
"Ve fall in with our Companies and are
reported present, then march out to the right
lIank and line up as a bano.
Fortunately for us,
the preliminary tune is limited and does not
worry us much.
"Man, Jimmie, that tune went well this
mornin'; what will we play gaun oat, Eh?
\Yhat aboot the 79th) Ay! we'll just play
that, and mind YOll, boys, see and pit in a' thae
grace notes. ~oo, you drummers, gie us a
good beat, and nane 0' your fancy' flams.'
"Koo, Donald, see and catch it upright! Here
the" come, left~rjght--Ieft-right-Ieft-Ieft "
-" Go on, the band!" This last is in our
S.-1\1.'s stentorian tones-" Right noo, off you
go," and away we go with the anticipation of
some real hard work.
You bhoys scoff at us and say we have a right
easy time of it, but, let me tell YOU, when we
are-in front of You we have to \yC;RK some, and
we really do earn our seven bob.
t t t
The Battalion Alphabet.
A' is the" Adjer "-salute when you-pass,
B is the Battalion all formed up in mass,
C is the" Clink." let ill.doers beware,
L> is the Drink that will land you in there.
E stands for" Echelon,"-oh, please excuse
F the Fiasco that often ensues.
G is for Gailes, by the sea firth so broad,
H think of Halliday drilling his squad.
I -we're" It "-hear us swank in the pubs,
J is for" Jimmy," the kindest of Subs. ;
K is for KeJly and Khaki of course,
L 's a Lieutenant-for better or worse.
M is the Mascot, to bring us all luck,
N is an X.C.O.-oh, what a buck!
o 's for an Officer, say Wolfe or Clive,
P stands for Pass--it's Form B Two·nine·fi\'e.
Q is a Q..M.-S.-mention no name,
R is for Robber, it's sometimes the same.
S is a Sergeant, " the Army's backbone,"
T is the Troopship we wish to be shewn.
U is the" Unter den Linden "-they'll stare,
V --ven with V.C.'s ve all valk down there.
\y is for Wensley-nice place, " I don't think."
H is for Heres, 'twould drive YOll to drink.
Y is for" Yabbling," we're told we mnst drop,
Z is for" Z·zzz "-hear the syphon--I'll stop!

166 THE OUTPOST,
J\Iv DEAR CHICKS,
Last time I wrote to you we were III
huts at Prees Heath. Now we are in tents, and
I have quite a lot to say to you, but you must
not expect a very long letter because paper is
very dear here. They charge about three times
the proper price for writing pads in the canteen.
"\-Ve are getting on very fast with our training
now. Just fancy, all the N.C.O.'s carry rifles
at last. It is true they are not very smart at
handling them. You should just hear the
Sergeant-Major talking to them on parade.
But, in about ten months they should be nearly
as efficient as the privates 'are now. So we
have not very much longer to wait.
And, besides that, the Officers all full
service kit on our route marches. At the
Battalion Orders say they' are to do so, and
Battalion Orders are'alwa';'s correct. Of course
an air cushion and say a ,,{tit of pyjamas are not
as heavy as a great-coat and mess tin, bllt they
make the valise look verv full. And as onl\' a
few of the Officers appear'to possess air cushions,
you will see that it is unreasonable to expect
them all to carry full equipment.
There are quite a lot uf regiments here, and
when we march up by \Vensley Station in the
morning it is a case of " Eyes right," .. Eyes
front," " Eyes left," " Eyes front," the \yhole
,way through the lines. We would all have stiff
necks if we had not had so much Swedish Drill
at Troon and Pre('s. Xo\\' we can Rce the benefit
of the long course of neck twisting \\hich
Sergeant-[nstructor Shuttle used to inllict upon
us. Yes! And also the benefits of the full
knee bend.
There are a great man~' worries at camp.
\Ve h~L\'e to layout our bedding and kits even'
morning, and the Compally-Sergeant-:'\lajor is
never satisfied until the whole line has been
laid out about half-a-dozen times in half-a-dozen
different ways. I wonder why it is that
Sergeant-Majors never knO\\- \l'h'at they lYant
you to do-or at least why they never tell you
what they want you to do. They always say,
" All this should have been done half-an-honr
ago." And when you have done it they come
along again and want it all changed. To be a
really efficient Sergeant-Major you should never
gil-e definite instructions beforehand. You
might be wrong. You must wait until the rank
and file do the thing for themselves, and then
vou can find fanlt. This is a hint for the senior
Sergeants who desire to get 011. Itis part of the
game to have e\'erything done twice over at
least, for if you don't check the men it is a
victory for them.
And there is no end to the number of fatigues
which are devised to annoy liS. Dut some of
these fatigues have their compensations. For
instance, take the Sergeants' Mess fatigue party.
These men are actually allowed to go into the
Sergeants' Mess, which is a most exclusive place
indeed. Any person below the rank of Sergeant
going in there is liable to be shot, at least. It is
true the fatigne party have got to wash up in
return for the privilege of entry. And if we are
to believe them, it is indeed a" mess."
And it is a verY serious otIence to lose any
part of your clothIng or equipment. Take tl1e
sad case of Private Bawheid of the 7[st H.L.I.
Jacko,
DroIL'n .,
Snarley.
OUR
Margus.
PETS. PIe. Th.", •• n,

THE OUTPOST.
167
!
Of course that is not our Battalion. Private
Bawheid loses the cork of his water-bottle out
on the moors one day. Quite a small matter,
you think. Not at all! It is a \'er\, serious
~tffair. lIe tells his Section Comman~ter, who
tells the Platoon Sergeant. The Jatter tells the
COlllpany-Sergeant-:\Iajor, who tells the ':\Iajor,
and so finally it comes to the C.O. And Private
Ha\vheid is ~at last brought before his Colonel
under escort, charged with
leading
to the Joss of government property, to wit,
" \\'ater-bottle, I914 pattern, Mark 1.*, one cork
with cap tin galv." and is astounded to learn
that the value thereof is about 6d. He
explains that the loss does not the utility
of the water-bottle as it Im;; not any value as
sHch. It has had a hole in it since he l:eceived it.
This only makes the offence more serious.
Why did lIe not return it to the C. O.-1\1.-S.
He explains he was on guard the day tlle faulty
equipment was returned, and when he (lid
return it he was told to go away somewhere and
take it with him.
At this point one particularly bright Officer
suggests a reference to the roster-book to verify
the statement that the man was really on guard,
and so the inquiry is adjourned for three weeks
while search is made for the foster.
\Vhen it is found no one can make head or tail
of it. The practice in the 7ISt Battalion is to
start a new roster on it new system every month
orso, whenever the previous one gets into a mess.
And that is why there is such a lack of system in
telling off men"for guard and other duties.
Well, the C.O. and the other Officers all read
their wee books and find no reference to corks or
anything like that, and so they refer the matter
io the \Var Office, and then the trouble really
begins. \Vhat happens then we really can't
sa\", but \ye have at least the satisfaction of
kriowing that the correspondence will last for
years and will cause endless waITV to numerous
i)epartments and Generals. ~
But Private Bawheid never gets it new cork
and never pays the cost of same. Instead he
gets a cork from the canteen which serves the
purpose of the old onc, and his \\"

168 THE OUTPOST.
My Idea 0/ a Decent Camp.
N0W that we are under canvas again, and
getting gradually settled down to the
conditions, perhaps it will not be out of place to
make a few suggestions and comments.
Choosing a site for camp certainly deserves a
few words. This is a "bee-si-ness" that
requires a great deal of careful thought and
experience, and only experts can expect to
have their services made use of in the selection
of suitable ground. These good gentlemen
should be students of nature, geologists and
botanists preferred. Farmers run them pretty
close, for they like the peaceful parts of mother
earth. Town dwellers and city men ,ue not
encouraged.
The first thing required is a medium sized
field, two or three miles from the nearest
railway station, with a large village 50 miles or
so distant, to which one can go when fortunate
enough to get a Saturday afternoon pass.
There should not be any signs of habitation
near. The walk to the station is enjoyed by all
and sundry, also the return journey at night,
especially if there be an unusually heavy
downpour of rain, and one's overcoat has been
left in the tent.
With regard to the training area, it is
essential that there should be as little Hat
ground as possible. Hills and steep rocky
places are best, as one can thereby work off
the effects of a heavy meal. If possible, the
camp should be situated in a valley, far belo\\'
sea level. There is a double object in this.
The first is to favour marching, for climbing
with a heavy pack and rifle tends to increase
one's staying power, and soldiers can get more
pleasure out of it than they would do on
ordinary level roads. The second object is to
enable the rain and spare water to run over the
floors of the tents. This helps to remove bread
crumbs and any beetles, spiders, etc., that
happen to be lying about. ':\lany camps, of
course, are placed on hills, and thus miss a
periodical wash-out. Concerning tents, it
should be observed that space must be left
between them for an occasional route-march at
inspection hours. These inspections are beloveri
by soldiers, and the space so provided may be
utilized for the laying out of beds and kit bags.
It is not considered advisable from a colour
point of view to have the tents of one tint.
Grey and white predominate, but other colours
might be used so as to relieve the mOll(,tonv.
If one could have a little liberty in this respect,
the camp could be made to look very attractive
and artistic, SUrely it is possible fo get a few
hints from some good-natured paperhanger or
carpetweaver. With tents arranged on the
principle of flower beds in a park, one could
produce no end of combinations, and this would
prove a boon to stragglers returning to camp at
night after being on the Spree (our pet name for
the Lre!) There would not be so much
difficulty in finding one's retreat. Red, white
and blue stripes would find votaries and look
well. Bright yellows and scarlets would not be
so very much out of place. Those of the cubist
school might do well to indulge in other
variations,
\Vith regard to water supplies, the water men
might be able to arrange for a separate tap for
each tent. By doing so, the early mOlning
scramble at the ablution benches would be
avoided. For the benefit of those that don't
care for water, perhaps some arrangement
could be arrived at. Some brewery would, no
doubt, take on the job. Failing them, the
canteen could be tried. Such tents would,
undoubtedly, never have the flap closed, and
the number of unwashable faces would be a
special feature of all parades. This would be a
distinct change, and the other" bhoys " would
shine to advantage. The Officer of the Guard
would have no difficulty in picking out the best
dressed men. Lemonade could be laid on, but
one's face and hands would get too sticky.
As to the tents themselves, possible improvements
might be suggested. To begin with,
there is a great lack of cosy corners, and hiding
places. This is a general complaint, for onc
finds it extremely difficult to get out of the way
when the sergeants are out for blood in the
shape of poor innocents for fatigues. Thi~
could be avoided. Suppose, for instance, th,.t
a board could be fixed to the tent pole, and so
fashioned that it could be worked like the
revolving doors one sees in the entrance of any
decent cafe. Such being the condition, one
would simply get behind it, and by judiCious
working, gradually turn it round, until the
sergeant, satisfied that no one could possibly be
there, would go off to look for prey elsewhere.
The oracle worker could then sit down again.
Then, perhaps, a place might be made for
men who have pet hobbies. A few shelves here
and there might be fixed up for plant pots,
bird cages, and gold fish jars, Some men afe
fond of fretwork, painting, knitting and crochetwork.
A few dog kennels outside would
complete the picture, and make it more like
home. Also a cat might be kept. Its duty
would be to catch mice and lap up spare milk
left over from tea. Space permitting, a few
rabbits and squirrels could be allowed, and an
odd carrier pigeon for taking home urgent
requests for postal orders, cakes, etc. A cow
and a few hens would also be useful, and
perhaps a vegetable patch. :\Ien who go in for
trained fleas should not be encouraged. A
weather-vane could be fixed up on the top of

THE OUTPOST.
Hi!)

170 THE OUTPOST.
the tent pole, as also a barometer outside, on
the tent flap. A few gramophones, pianos, etc.,
might also be aliowed, on the understanding
that a man have at least two records.
For the purpose of getting tired and ,yeary
souls out of bed in the morning, the \Var Office
might be approached with a view to having
megaphones supplied to each tent. Also, seeing
so many of the" bhoys " like to talk all night,
it might not be out of the war to have the tents
lined with some slIper-non-sound-conductor
material. Failing that, a sleeping draught
should be included in the rations. The babeI
of voices would then be hanlh' heard outside,
and onc could be sure of getting to sleep if ~o
dbposed.
Some men seem to have no idea how much
luggage should be in a tent-at least
judging from om first experience of camp life.
A law should be passed limiting each man's
possessions to one furniture van load. Fishing
outfits, cricket sets, and billiard tables take up
too much room if present in qnantity. Before
going to sleep at night it is necessary to go round
the inside of the tent with et yardstick and pair
of cOll1pas~es.
To my mind, it battalion shoulll be composcd
of two companies of tall men, and hyo of small
bantams. The overcro\nling problern \\'ould
then be solved, and one would be able to find
one'~ own feet in the morning.
Let us now turn our eyes to the canteen. It
must be a sort of Klond):ke in its way. };105t of
our salary finds its way there, the greater part
being :=nndlO\yed up in cakes. One can easih'
get sixpennyworth of goods for a shilling, The
wet canteen is generally full to oycrllowing, amI
one has almost to book it se,it in ath',mce.
Seeing there isn't a decent to"'n ann\'here, wc
are obliged to spend most of 0111' time there.
Perhaps that is why onc sees so many" O\'cr
happy" faces about 9.30 p.m. Another
Y.M.C.A. hut would be as welcome as a sno\\'­
storm at the Equator. Once upon a time
bright girliSh faces beamed into our own, an

THE OUTPOST.
171
IT'S a litter of blankets and rifles and kits,
Of boots and balatas and khaki misfits,
But compared with the rest it resembles the Ritz I
It's our tent,
'We're out with" revallv " and in with" tattoo,"
\Ve sort up our tent just the same as you
And we're fed on the same uneatable stew
In our. ten t.
At inspections the spirit of tidiness spreads,
And the Corporal tells us to work with our heads.
So we push all the brock to the hack of the beds!
In our tent.
Domestic Military Service.
A FE\V days after the conclusion of the gTeat
Germanic 'World 'War, Private Pullthrough
fuund himself once more on his native heath,
with a fine bonus from his (;overnment in one
pocl{et. and his discharge in the other.
In ciyilian life Pullthrough had been a wellto-do
draper, with a good business, in a smaU
town situated on the banks of the Ch-de. His
instinctive patriotism, combined ~vith the
persuasions of his spouse caused him to join the
Chamber of Commerce Battalion, a few months
after its inauguration, and as a member of that
bodv hc full v believed that he could be of
material assistance to his King and Country.
In this he was somewhat disappointed, as he
was discharged along with his companions in
the autumn of 19I7, after about three years'
seryice, for which he had nothing to sho''

172 THE OUTPOST.
service bed lai(l out on his bedroom floor, and
three army blankets laid on top. As he had
slept on a camp bed for a matter of r ,000 (laYs,
he did not consider it worth while enquiring into
the matter, but contented himself with haying a
look rOllnel his room. His eye immediately
caught sight of a tY}lC'-written notice on tll(' \\illi,
which on perusal he fOll11d to read
OHDEHS FOR TITL'RSDA y,
5-.W a.111.-H.eveille, as usual.
6-8-30 a.lll,~Tidying bedroom, washing, de,
8-30-9-30 a,m.~Breakfast.
9-30-Il-O a.m.-Floors will be scrubbed, and
all utensils and equipmC'nt cleaned, for
inspection by the Orderly Officer.
TT-D-I-O p,m.--:-Shopping,
T-0-2-0 p.m.-Dinner.
2-0-,f-30 p.m.-General cleaning np of
premises and fittings, digging garden and
catting grass.
1fatt. could not refrain' fmm admiring what
he considered to be a t011ch of h llmOllJ' on his
wife's 'part, and retired to bed without further
delay, in a very complacent state of mind.
The following morning he was out .of bed and
was proceeding to fold his blankets in the old
familiar manner before he realised that his Ann,'
were past, and ih"t he should be still
sleeping in a feather bed, if his calculations of a
few days past had not miscarried. Heveille
sounded in his ears, however, and appeared to
be played hy an experienced situated
somewhere downstairs. and on proceeding
thither to inn'stigate, 1Tatt. was astonished to
find n magnificent gramophone 'hard at \york
emulating the pipes.
Again, tickled In' his wife's originality, he
determined to carry Ollt the spirit of the enterprise,
and accordingly proceeded to tid~' up his
room, wash, shave, etc., and when he had
titivated himself to his complete satisfaction,
he descended to the parlour, only to [md an
enamelled bowl and plate set on a spotless cloth,
accompanied by condiments which suggested a
yery appetising meal. He had been well feci in
the Arm\', and \\'as dreaming of white pwidings
and othe'r luscious dishes, which he had partaken
of in Camp, when he was awakened out of his
reverie In' the "Cook-House" call, which
caused hiri1 to automaticallv seize his plate and
bO\vl and go in search of victuals. He reached
the kitchen door, where a blushing Scots lassie
handed him a liberal ration of porridge and
cream, and ham and eggs, but she was a little
taken aback when Matt. gaye her a couple of
resounding kisses~--the kind he had learned to
at Chester.
Pullthrough was enjoying a quiet afterbreakfast
smoke when his beloved companion
entered, and in reph' to his assurances of
perpetual devotion and everlasting admiration,
asked him if he hac! read the Orders for the Day,
" Xo clear." .
" \Yell, my lad, \'on'cl better get a moyc 011­
you're in the Army now, you know! Draw
i'ations for two at ,Jinner time, and get these
mess

THE OUTPOST.
~-~..---...--------.-----­
the club, but on broaching the subject to his
wife a little later she said:
" Matt., my dear, to-night, to celebrate your
return, we are going to the Prayer Meeting! "
After four days" Special Training" our hero
read on the orders:
DISCHARGE.-Private Matthew Pnllthrough,
No. 12345, having been found unfit for
Military Domestic Service, is struck off
the strength of the Battalion accordingly.
Xot even "paid up to and including," he
murmured, as he turned away, a cherubic smile
illuminating his features.
J. T. S.
E are ready and fit,
W And we strain a t the collar
To be doing our' bit:
We are ready and fit,
So let's pack up our kit- ­
You may bet every dollar
We are ready and fit
And we strain at the collar.
BEE.
173
..,-------------------­
A Sigh for the Good Old Days.
o BUGLE that dost bid me rest
And seek repose before the sun is set,
Subdue thy note--a chastened air were best,
Sleep holds aloof when bones and ground are met.
Nightly I woo thee, :\lorpheus,
Bribe thee with beer when gentler arts are vain,
In other days thou didst not serve me thus;
Is it revenge for my one time disdain,
When, eyes unscaled, I put my book
And cheerful blaze before a feather bed,
Greeting the coming dawn without rebuke?
Now sounds reveille ere the night is dead.
Here, for my sins, in pain I crouch,
Praying for dawn and yet athirst for sleep,
Approach, 0 martyrs who had spikes for couch,
I know a torture that will make ye weep.
BEE.
HOME FOR THE WEEK.END--TELLlNG THE TALE.
Pt •. M'Nidder.

174 THE OUTPOST.
Night in the Tents.
A FTER spending the evening in luxurious
lounging around Camp, we hear "first
post" sounded with something of regret, and
realise that, when the last-minute-Iemon-squashtipplers
have been ejected from the canteen, and
come straggling tentwards, we shall have to
prepare to retire.
Our tent has no great reputation for orderliness,
and the method of getting to bed is as
follows. The contents of the tent, including
kit bags, equipment, old carpet slippers, small
libraries, and packs of cards are heaved outside
to form a confllsed and disorderly mass. Then
we proceed to lay the waterproof sheets and, as
there are two of these amongst three Privates,
this is a ticklish job. Next we hunt out our
belongings from the common mound, after much
difference of opinion as to the ownership of
various articles. When the two gentlemen,
with whom I have the honour to share two
sheets, and I pile up our effects inside we find
to our disgust that we have laid the sheets wrong
side down. Each member of the trio
strenuously denies his share of this piece of
carelessness. After the loss of much time and
temper, however, we set mitters aright, and
are in a position to sink to rest.
I have discarded my kit bag as a pillow on
account of the numerous small boxes, football
boots, etc., which it contains. Accordingly I
set it upright at the side of my pillow, which is
made up of my greatcoat, jersey, and a blue
fatigue suit. Still there is a pair of army boots
left, and for want of a better place, I place them
on top of my kit bag. One fine night they
remained there till I got wen off to sleep, when
I was awakened by a mighty clout on the head.
I jumped up, and (hearing noises, which to my
startled ears seemed to be deafening explosions,
but were in reality stertorous efforts on the part
of sleeping Privates with mouths wide open).
came to the conclusion that our Camp was the
object of an air attack. Soon. ho\vever, I
discovered that my right hand bed mate,
Fammishe. was dreaming. prob!l.bly of a good
meal, and in his excitement was wildly flinging
about his arms. and thus had caused the downfall
of the boots.
Before I get to sleep, however, I have to
suffer great inconvenience, due to my having to
lie in a cramped up position, despite the protests
of Fammishe, who gets my knees in his back.
Shanks is the cause of an the trouble. Shanks
and I form a diameter of the circular area
enclosed by the tent, but we aren't each a
radius. The proportion of our shares of the
diameter may be stated as Shanks; Me ; ; 3 ; 2.
I always go to bed before Shanks and straightway
get my feet to the pole. Shanks gets
to bed, however, and extends from the centre,
my legs are propelled upwards with great force
until my knees nearly touch my chin. Shanks
at rest is bad, but when he gets annoyed in his
sleep he is the---, well, a beastly nuisance.
Despite it all I sleep well, and am aroused by
the now familiar injunction to "show a leg,
t,here !" This is my first experience of camp
hfe, I may say, and, when I first heard this
order delivered in a tone of authority, I felt
obliged to rise and shove the desired limb
through the first hole I could see. Unfortunately
the zealous C.-O.-S.'s face was in close
proximity to that hole on the outside, and
when I gave my foot a graceful twirl close to his
probOSCis, he retreated ten yards. and instead of
being delighted with my promptitude in obeying
orders, he grabbed his nose and howled back
that the next time this sort of thing occurred
I should certainly get four days" C.B." and lose
two days' pay. Moreover, I should incur this
dread penalty in any case if my feet weren't
thoroughly washed before foot inspection at
7 a.m. I have since learned that the aforesaid
N.C.O. is allowed to use such a ridiculous order
merely to provide him with a little variation
from the pomp and formality of his usual
commands. In fact it serves as his dailv
allowance of humour. ­
Soon the whole tent is aroused, and Fammishe
and Shanks, who are Mess Orderlies for the day,
are arguing as to who is to go for early morning
coffee. Shanks wins.
SLEEPIEAD.
Draw" by
Pt.. Tnom••",
Signaller :_H Y ou're~practically wiped out. I'm
a Machine Gun! "
Scout :-"Rats! You were outflanked an hour
ago. I'm a Battalion 1"

THE OUTPOST.
175
In continuance of the Battalion Cricket matches
our Battalion XI. met the 16th (S.)
Cricket. Battalion H.L.I., and after an effort
we managed to defeat them by 39
runs. \Ve won the toss and, on a pitch practically
certain to crumble, naturally took first lease of
the wicket, but we were dismissed for the miserable
total of 79, of which Private R. R. \Vaters collected
40 by good forcing cricket. Our batsmen were, to
a certain extent, to blame for what almost amounted
to a debacle, but the brilliance of Sergt. Fotheringham
behind the wickets, and the steady bowling of
Lieut. M'Dermid were the principal factors in
keeping our men from scoring heavily. Sergt.
Fotheringham is a veteran, and somewhat eccentric
cricketer; I think he surprised himself by his own
play; certain it is that he opened the eyes of his
friends and opponents. He took four catches
behind the wickets-three of them on the by side-­
a very rare occurrence and a difficult feat, while he
also stumped one man. Mr. M'Dermid had the
very good bowling analysis of 6 wickets for 22 runsanalysis
that probably flatters his bowling somewhat.
On going in to bat, the r6th seemed to have a very
easy task before them, but the bowling of Private
M' AlIan and Private Thom proved too much for
them. They could gather only 40 runs, to which
Sergt. M'Kay, the Clydesdale fast bowler and heavy
hitter, contributed 23. Private M'Allan had the
excellent analysis of 7 wickets for 20, and Private
Thom 3 for 20.
On 2Ist June, a very interesting match took place
at Coton Hall, between the Officers, N.C.O.'s and
men of the Battalion. The Officers lost the toss,
and of course, fielded. Lce.-Sergt. Kennedy and
Private \Vaters were the first pair, and before they
were separated, 59 runs were on the board.
Kennedy was the first to go with 26 runs, while
Waters was top score with 39 runs. The noticeable
feature of the partnership was the hard hitting of
both batsmen. Despite such a good start the
N.C.O.'s and men were all out for 127. Captain
who came on to bowl late in the innings,
7 wickets cheaply. The Officers collected
I03 runs on a very difficult and dangerous wicket.
Lieut. Gardiner was top scorer with 23 runs.
Next day we had a mixed match at Shavingtonone
of the finest grounds that one could wish to play
on-a fast, true wicket, a good out-field amid ideal
surroundings. The match was between Officers and
men of A and B Companies, and C and D Companies.
A and B batted first and looked like doing very
badly when Lieut. Begg and Corpl. Dickson came to
the rescue with 2I runs and 57 respectively, while
:Mr. Stevens, an Officer of 3rd H.L.I. on furlough,
followed up with the most brilliant innings of the
afternoon-27 runs, not out, got by artistic cricket
all round the wicket. Altogether A and B totalled
r60 runs, C and D had not too much time in which
to get the runs, but by hard hitting they collected
the respectable total of 135 runs for 6 wickets.
Thus only shortage of time prevented them from
winning. The best bowler of the day was Private
Waterman of B Company. He bowls a fast
medium, right.handed bowl, with a natural off spin,
and he comes off the wicket like lightning, his height
helping him greatly.
... '*' '*'
Since our departure from Troon and its luxurious
life (judged from Army standards),
Boxing. Boxing has assumed a position
nearer to that which it usually
occupies in Army Athletics.
The lack of such a fine sports. field as the Troon
Polo Ground undoubtedly was, and the fewer
counter-attractions athletically which the loss of it
entailed, have been factors in the change. Moreover
our removal from town surroundings, where a black
eye meant loss of caste, to camp where life close to
mother earth overrules the tyrannies begotten of
city existence, has, we think, roused the latent
combativeness in us, and the resuscitation of Boxing
necessarily followed. This cannot be but for our
good in the days, which we hope are not too far
distant, when many lives may depend on our ability
to keep cool under fire and accept punishment with
a stiff upper lip.
\Ve have previously remarked in these columns
on the rapidity of thought which Boxing induces.
In bayonet fighting the foot work is very similar.
In both, perfect balance must be maintained; this
is got by a slight bending of the left knee as you
thrust or strike. The' On guard' position in either
is free from muscular tension, thus allowing the
maximum of speed and power to be attained with
the minimum expenditure of energy. The eye,
trained in the ring to anticipate, ward off and judge
the strength of a blow. must hold an overwhelming
advantage over one not so exercised, in parrying a
bayonet thrust. To these advantages must be
added the knowledge of the value of variety in
attack, and of speed when that attack is delivered.
The number of competitors, so far, has exceeded
our expectations, and the keenness with which they
have applied themselves is reflected in the good
form they now display. Among the spectators
there must be a considerable number who are being
kept from entering into the game by a false modesty
or the fear of being laughed at.' To these we extend
an invitation to come in and do their best. \Ve are
all learning, and only by co·operation and practice
can we hope to attain proficiency.

176 THE OUTPOST.
S.M.L.E., Mk. 1.*, (C.)
Md., H. V.A.
THE above somewhat cryptogramic condensation
is the War Office description of
the rifles which are now arriving from the great
Government Ordnance Stores at ---, and
are being issued to the 17th H.L.L as our
service arms, and with which presently our
whole brigade will be equipped.
The question is sometimes asked why the
British regular should be armed with a rifle
which is so short and dumpy in appearance
when compared with the rifles used by all other
armies; its barrel being in fact from five to
eight inches shorter than the barrels of foreign
rifles.
Well, its design was one of the results of the
South African \Var of 1899-1902. Profiting
by the lessons of that struggle, and with a view
to thlCl simplification and consequent cheapening
of the manufacture of our military small-arms,
the War Office authorities instructed the expert
designers at Enfield Lock and at the B.S.A.
Works to make out specifications for a weapon
which could be used by all the services alikeinfantry,
cavalry, artillery. engineers, the Royal
Navy, Indian and Colonial troops, etc.
The product of their labours was a kind of
compromise between the ordinary long rifle and
the carbine, viz., the Short Rifle, ~Iark I.,
Model 1905, a really fine, strong, well-balanced
little weapon which gave excellent results, but
which was designed only to handle and fire the
Mark VI. cartridge, at that time the standard
British ammunition.
With the introduction in 1:908 of the much
more powerful Mark VII. cartridge, however,
another factor came into play, namely, the
increased strain on the barrel and thrust of the
explosion on the bolt-head, amounting to an
extra five tons per square inch of chamberpressure.
This led to the designing of the :.'VIark n.,
Mark In. and Mark IV. Short Rifles, all of
whJch have extra-strong bolt closures.
And now, at this crisis in the Empire's
history, when the demand for service rifles is so
insistent, the very wise course is being taken of
altering and adapting all suitable ~Iark 1. arms
for use with the latest and most powerful
propellant.
The Short Magazine Lee-E)1field, Mark One
Star, Converted and Modifiectfor High-Velocity
Ammunition (to write all the cryptogram out in
full), is the same weapon as the first issue of the
British Short Rifle, but with certain verv
important improvements which fit it to take its
place as one of the most efficient military rifles
in use by atly army at the present time.
Firstly, the back-sight bed has been lowered
to allow for the flatter trajectory of the 174­
grain Mark VII. bullet. But the chief improvement
has been the stronger bolt with larger
locking-lug and bolt-head forming a powerful
wedge-grip behind the cartridge base. Also
a special auxiliary spring and extra lip have been
fitted to the magazine, giving a still nearer
approach to certainty in handling the n",edlepointed
bullet. In addition, many, if not all of
the rifles have been re-barrelled with finest
high-tensile chrome-steel barrels; altogether,
the Mark I. >11 forms as good and reliable a rifle as
any soldier need wish to handle and use.
On every barrel, just under the back-sight
elevating wheel, can be seen the Government
Proof-house stamp--HV, indicating that the
barrel and breech-action have successfully
withstood the severe strain of the final
proof-charge, which develops the tremendous
internal pressure of something like 3I tons per
square inch; the rifle is thus guaranteed for use
with the high-velocity cartridge.
The sliding charger-guide carried by the
bolt-head is perhap~. not quite so strong and
certain in its action as the bridge charger-guide
of later models, but many experienced shots,
whose 0pinions are worthy of respect, prefer the
former; a cours~ of steady practice in its use
will ensure surprisingly smart rapid-fire.
As to weight, the rifle is fully a pound
lighter than the original Lee-Metford, and, with
the long and terribly effective 1907 model
sword-bayonet, makes a combination which is
infinitely superior for hand-to-hand work to
the clumsy and top-heavy bayoneted Mauser of
the German infantryman, and partly explains
the growing disinclination of our foes to stand
the shock of British steel.
The Patriot.
MARK DRUMMOND, Sergt.
HIS the great love of a great heart
In which no selfish thought had part,
A love that sought no other prize
Than this-all things to sacrifice
To her he loved-his native land.
Of baser motives had he none,
No hope of glory spurred him on,
No love of battle, lust or strife,
He only knew he gave his life
For her he loved-his native land.
His grave is 'neath an alien sky;
No marble pillar rearing high
Doth mark the place where he is laid,
\Vho faced Hell's fury, unafraid,
For her he loved-his native land.
R.B.

THE 0 TPOST. 177
Impression of the 97th Brigade.
Al'Pl{E 1.\1'1 X JW doubt i ~iCl f e ; b ill i I' i t
should come to cr i Li cism of the ' -'ain lI v
T hinl ' 01' t lte ' ;0

178 THE OUTPOST.
One wonders whence the rumours come; who
is responsible for them l For my part, I
confess that I reached one of the most vivid
moments of my life when one of the most
startling of them all was given me on the
authority of " Gray of Govan." Bless the boys
who start the stories, for they keep up the
interest of life. But still the question presses,
" \Vhere are we going; when?" and for my
part I believe no man on earth knows the
answer.
Yes, it is a wonderful Brigade. There are
four best Battalions in it-a thousand men are
quite sure about each. And there are four best
Companies in each Battalion, with 250 men
prepared to take an oath on the subject. And
there are at least a dozen officers who are the
best all-round soldiers in the Brigade; and do
not scores of men know it for certain in each
c3.se? \Vhich things surely are among the best
signs the Brigade could show. If enthusiastic
loyalty to one's Battalion and one's officers is
one of the things which makes for military
efficiency, then, indeed, this Brigade is in a
happy condition.
I often look at this city of white tents and
wonder at it all. Here ~ve are in a peaceful
Yorkshire dale, where nature is beautiful, kind,
when the glories of summer delight our hearts,
and the people we meet are all kindness itself.
Our boys are gay, happy, and, in spite of early
hours, long marches, life has a hundred worthy
pleasures in it. Can it really be true that
mankind has reached one of the most tragic
hours of history, that the most cruel of all
modern wars is raging. Can it be that we have
a definite relation to it, that tragedy, death, lie
in wait for us also over the hill. It is hard to
believeit!
Yet t doubt whether any of us reallv ever
forget it.. The weight of heavy responsibility is
on all our leaders. Every man among us has been
through an hour when he said, " If my country
needs my life it may have it." Every man
gets through with the hardships, because they
all have sOPle real relation to a cause worth
dying for. It would seem that merely to keep
what our fathers.' won, we must he prepared to
die, and I have the impression that underneath
all its gaiety the Brigade is grimly determined
and entirely ready for its part. Unless I am
mistaken, there is really a new-dogged
seriousness in all its members.
These t4(ngs are not for talking about, and
it is well that sometimes they can be forgotten,
but what gives the Brigade its real character is
that its members have found something in life
bigger and better than either ordinary business
or ordinary pleasure, and that something has
done much to make many of them bigger and
better men than they were. •
Life is never so worth living as when at any
moment it may be lost, and though we are not
at the Front, we are in the grip of the same
cause that inspires the fighting line.
The question no doubt still presses, " \Vhere
are we going; when?" It presses because
men want the chance to fight and die.
God only knows when we are going, but
meantime does not this fact put meaning
enough into life-that here and now we can, if
we will become ready-ready and fit to fight,
yes, and ready and fit to die.
A. HERBERT GRAY, C.F.
t t t
Our Letter Bag.
To the EDITOR,
SIR,
In the April issue of The Outpost 1
appealed for tobacco and clothing for the
K.O.S.B.'s prisoners in Germany, and the
following letter is the thanks for same.
R. S.-M. KELJ.Y.
29/4/15·
DEAR SIR,
On behalf of the K.O.S.B. boys
here, under C.-S.-M. Fitzgerald, I beg to thank
you for your splendid gift of pipes, tobacco, and
cigarettes. We think not only of the gift but
of the kindly thought which prompted the
action, and means much to us here. Up-to-date
we have also to thank you for clothing parcels,
1I of which arrived. Much appreciated.'
.:vIy address is :­
Yours obediently,
W. N. GUl'

THE UTP ST, 179
J ust Talk.
T h !iC , r just t he odds anI! ends .thaL one
runs agaiust ill v i siti ng friends in di erellt tents
in '1,mp. If we w re i I Ro m , easiel r , drt, or
8 11 i ndu!';lri: tl cntr ', ollr vis itin g- Iis l might: be
co ns iJerau [\, lIlcrea ed b v t his time, bU l­ - ! ! !
W ell , one member of Ihe H,ltieJiioll, wri ting to a
fri end f f'gan li ng our re' ption ;I t \ '\'ensley, sa id ,
" ,>'Ill the I nhab ii::l.l1t s turneJ o u r t o \I' Icome u. ,
~Lnd we . hook h

180 THE OUTPOST.
If our meals aren't the finest part of our life
here a week-end pass just about is, and the
prospect of one keeps us going wonderfully.
One lucky private who has just returned from
enjoying one of these says that the great thing
about them is that the bugle never worries you,
especially at 5-30 a.m. According to him,
however, it is just glorious to waken at that
time in the morning and show your contempt
for the clock in the good old naughty boy
fashion. I wonder how many of us who have
still a pass to look forward to will take the
trouble to waken so early, even for the sake of
experiencing that delight?
Two of our six-footers went to York one
Saturday, and while there were approached by
a Tommy.-perhaps I should say another
soldier -who asked them .. Are you in the
17th Royal Scots?" .. No ! " answered one of
our lads "but are they not the Edinburgh
Bantams? " " Ay," said he who had asked
the qu~.!i~n;" ah'vea brither your sizein the 111 ." _.
Nearly everyone of us has had experience of
the utter stranger who approaches and engages
in conversation. One of our aristocrats was
tackled in that way by a man who said, "Do
you come from Glasgow?" In his best
Kelvinside, he replied, " Ye-s! Rath-er!!"
to which the stranger answered, " So dae ah !
Coocaddens !" Imagine! I !
Of course, claiming township is quite a
common thing. If one makes a success, it is
wonderful how many men and places will claim
relationship with the successful one. Look at
Harry Lauder. Everyone knows how many
different mining villages at one time claim~d to
be his birthplace. The same sort of thing has
been going on about the writer of this page.
For the last five years Edinburgh and Dundee
have been arguing about him; the Edinburgh
people swear he was born in Dundee and the
Dundee people swear he was born in Edinburgh!
Oh. L--!
A. M. ~l'N.
- . ~'""
.,.....,flIJ.-¥ ~ (~___
/ I~ •
-I .­
'"," r ~
IS":' ~- J.--,
~9 J t
Draw" DJ!
Pte. SI,wart
English Inspecting OJJicer-" Tell me what the scheme is!" Prioate-" D'ye see yon smeekin' lum,
yonder? \Veel, oor orders ur tae tak' the muckle sauny humplock tae the richt o' it!"
E.I.o.-" Er-er--exactly !"
~

,--------­ ...~~....~~~~~~~-~~-------------
THE OUTPOST.
181
A COMPANY,
COMPANY Comment for June will seem rather
like horses of the same colour, for the Company
activities have been the activities of the whole
Battalion, except in very minor points. In Prees
our training consisted of route marching-fifteen
miles, with short hourly halts-company, squad
and extended order drill on Twemloes Farm grounds,
and skirmishing in the policies of Shavington and
Clovelly Halls. The phenomenal weather which
held during our six weeks' sojourn in Shropshire
distilled many an ounce of perspiration from our
Scots skins. Although the roads were level, my
word, they were dusty, and the heat was often 88" in
the shade. One feature of our stay in Prees was
the extraordinary kindness shown on all sides to the
H.L.I.
The houses and halls for miles around th(, Camp
were Liberty Halls to the bhoys, and provided frills
to our austere military life. We left Prees on the
, 13th June, wondering what sort of hole \Vensley
would prove to be, and our farewell from the
Salopians in the Camp and Whitchurch was maist
aflectin', coming, as it did, about II p.m. \Vc
reached Wensley at 6-30 a.m. the following morning,
and proceeded to the camping ground, ten minutes
march from the station, and spread ourselves outtwelve
in a tent. Our work in Yorkshire has
consisted of route.marching, skirmishing, defending,
,and minor tactics, and the countryside is hilly
enough to suit any mountaineer. \Vhen in
Leyburn the other night an admirer of the Saintly
Third enquired what Company a certain soldier was
attached to. "A Company," he replied. "Is
that because it's the first Company? the AI-eh? "
.the admirer queried. "Yes, the first and best,"
answered Sandy M'Nab.
No. 3 Platoon will miss Sergeant Carnan, who
has been transferred to the Depot Company at
Gailes. He left his Platoon with very sincere
regrets, and the men wish to express their appreciation
of his tact, commonsense handling, and real
cleverness, especially in the department of field
engineering. They will follow his future with
/"interest, and wish him every success in his new
:. sphere. Cricket has been indulged in by the
Company platoons, and we think that more
opportunity should be given to the men to practice
at the nets at night. That's what the nets are for.
B COMPANY.
IT was with somewhat mixed feelings that we
took our departure from Prees. We were
leaving comfortable huts with all modern conveniences,
we had made many new friends amongst
the inhabitants, whose kindness and cordiality
will not readily be forgotten, and we were within
easy reach by road and rail of some of England's
most interesting centres. Nevertheless we could
not but look forward to a change from the flat
heaths and enclosed lanes of Shropshire to the
Yorkshire moors and hills. \Vhile one could not
but admire the beautiful surroundings on Prees
areas, they were cramped and enclosed from a
training point of view. Here at Wensley are great
tracts of open country admirably suited for our
Battalion and Brigade training, and we feel more in
our native element surrounded by river, moor and
hill.
Our senior N.C.O.s are now the proud possessors
of the new service rifle, and we like to regard it as
a hopeful sign that all ranks will shortly be in
possession of same. Meantime we have to rest
content with an issue of blank ammunition in the
morning which we return to store intact in the
afternoon. Boots at last! Some of us had given
up hope and bought our own, others are now
exchanging old boots for new, and we believe there
is prospect of effecting a similar bargain with our
glengarrys. But what about our blue uniforms?
Still two more members of B Company have
departed to take up Commissions, viz., L.-Corpls.
J. R. Young and H. P. M'Gavin.
Those of B Company who were privileged to
play Cricket will always have a very pleasant
memory of the games played at Whitchurch,
Coton Hall, and Shavington Hall. In our game
at Whitchurch with A Company, we were defeated
by a narrow margin, but we hope to do better in our
return match. Unfortunately, owing to our short
stay at Prees the Knock-out Tournament did not
get beyond the first round.
C COMPANY, * * *
pESSIMISM pays when it does not lead to
disappointment, as the following prognostication
indicates ;-
Prees,
The beez.,
Farewell !
Wensleydale,
Monotonous vale,
Oh,--!!
Thus wrote a certain C Company man in a young
lady's autograph album a day or two before our
departure from Shropshire, and although he spake
drivel, the fates must have inspired the forecast.
Approached the other evening the chappie in
question was asked if his prophecy had materialised,
and he gave a mournful shake of the head, murmuring
the while, "Oh, --!".
Now, from this little story, which gives a pretty
fair idea of Cs attitude towards the change, it must
not be taken that the" Saintly Third" are lacking
in the sense of appreciation. The equivocal" Oh,
I" is simply an opinion on the basis of corn·
parison, and let it be known at once that we do
admire the beauty of this sweet valley, which
almost rivals some of our best Scottish scenery in
natural magnificence. But, after all, we merely
appreciate Wensley as far as a lover of nature can
appreciate her wonders and at the same time hold a
rankling desire for the gay whirlpool of city life.

182 THE OUTPOST.
True. we have not just come from town, and Prees
Heath in itself fully deserved to be described as
one of the last places contemplated and with
reluctance carried into a state of fruition; but
those dear old huts (new, really, but they seem old
now) were so near Chester, Shrewsbury (H and
especially \Vem," a voice whispers as I write) that
we actually imagined ourselves living at those
places. Therefore, granted the loveliness of Wensley,
and the charm of her romance, she loses in the
comparison. Ere getting to the informative notes,
it might be remembered that this confounded wet
weather more than anything else has led to the
opinion that the implied colloquialism sums things
up to a nicety;
Folks away yonder in Glasgow, who have friends
in C, will be wonder~ng what the Company have
been doing since arrival at the North Riding.
Practically nil as a Company would be the proper
thing to say, but the almighty Editor has willed
that this pen must not stop yet awhile. The
Battalion, as the scribes of the other Companies no
doubt have observed, is making a bold effort to
work itself into a spot of grease by daily manreuvres
or route marches, and little chance has been given
the Companies individually to carry some of their
theories into practice. The other week, however,
Captain Morton had us at Middleham Moor, and
along with D we carried out some very successful
attacks. Poor C had to run the gauntlet in a
machine gun swept valley, but plied the rifle with
such accuracy that in a short time the gun signalled
itself out of action. Truly, we live in exciting
times 1
As indicated in the opening paragraph, C has a
decided eye for the beautifu,l, and some weird yarns
about sore feet have percolated through to the
Quarter.Master (via C.-Q.-M.-S. Ferds) since the
arrival of the brown boots. By the way, ye outsiders,
the "browns" are capital affairs with
broad toes, and if you look around you may get a
glimpse of them i·n Glasgow these days of week-end
leave-Please, Mr. Editor, the purpose of this par.
(oh, yes, it has a purpose 1) is to show that our
worldly needs are being attended to !
The arrival of the new rifles has set C, in common
with the other Companies, agog with excitement,
and a lust to use them. So far only the N.C.O.s
have got them, but it is understood that the men
will receive an issue shortly. To the day when they
will be used ! I /
D COMPANY.
IT is with some misgiving that we take up the pen
to put on record the doings of the Company for the
past month. It seems but yesterday since we were
confronted with the Editor's" Have you D Company's
notes ready yet?" Then followed a night
of tossing and turning on our late lamented
comfortable bed, and little or nothing to show for
it in the morning. Still we must" stick it" and
make the best of a bad job.
The one item of outstanding importance in the
last four weeks was the move from Prees to our
present station, which we expect is fully dealt with
elsewhere in this issue. As we were the first
Company to leave vVhitchurch, perhaps a word
here would not be amiss. Considering the short
time we were at Prees Heath we made some very
good friends. We were only beginning to get
settled down and used to the way of our English
friends when we had to leave. The hospitality
extended to us was a very pleasant surprise, and we
venture to think we would travel far in our own
country to find its equal. The send-off at the
station was very enthusiastic, and the road between
Dodington and the station must have held the best
part of the population of the district to see the last
of the " Scotties."
It will be of interest to D Company to know that
the Battalion huts at Prees were the cleanest in the
Brigade, and we have it on unimpeachable authority
that our own were the best in the Battalion. Bravo!
This is at least some recompense for all the hard
work we put in at floors, beds and tables.
Our life at \Venslev is not much different to what
it was before, excepf that we are getting nearer to
active service conditions, and have to dispense with
the little luxuries such as baths, etc., that we
enjoyed while in the huts.
The N.C.O.s have been issued with the rifle we
are to carry when we go abroad, and before this
appears in print the whole Battalion will probably
be armed with the same weapon.
The air and the climatic conditions are much
better here than at our last station, and when toiling
up some of the hills to the tralning areas it reminds
one of Dundonald Hill, only that was child's play
in comparison to some we have tackled recently.
It was rather unfortunate that .we were on
Company Training on the first sports day. We
returned to Camp after a gruelling day to find a
cricket match in progress and a boxing ring erected.
Some of the stalwarts of the noble art were standing
by to give instructions and incidentally a few bruises
to any aspirants. I't was noticed, however, that
even the best can come to grief, as one of our
instructors had a beautiful black eye in embryo.
\Ve must congratulate Sergeant Maxwell 011
coming out so well in the Machine Gun examination.
With regard to the new course of instruction. we
notice the name of Lieutenant RusselL We will be
very sorry to lose this officer, but as long as the
Battalion requires the best, D Company will not
grumble at their loss.
It is now beyond the shadow of a doubt that W'e
are going to India, as the C.-S.-M. is reported to
have a bottle of chutney in his tent. Keep it dark!
t t t
The Mascot Speaks.
THOUGH I'm young and feeble, shaky on my
feet,
Tethered in the camp lines, scarcely dare to bleat;
Still I've" let my light shine," as good books have
said,
And it's quite surprising how my influence spread.
For to-day a " corporal "-one stripe on his coat,
Called a shrinking private, " a silly blooming goat! "
And I've heard this also-twilight's shades amid,
"Soldier, stop your kiddin' !" "Good.night my
dearest kid! "
A. K.
-~~~----- ~-------------~--------------~

THE OUTPOST.
183
ITI'\ ·TF\f. 'l)t:POT' (aY.' AT ',~AILt5'
Drawn hy

184 THE OUTPOST.
Sub-Editorial.
The Outpost maintains a healthy circulation
of 4,000 copies each month, and
Us. continues to receive flattering notice
in the Press. In Prees it tickled the
Salopians, and we are gratified to learn that
many of our well-wishers around the Shropshire
Camp have become subscribers to the Magazine.
Her Grace, Katharine, Duchess of Westminster,
has been keenly interested in our journalistic
endeavours, and the bhoys who contribute to
the Mag. should feel' kin' 0' prood ' at the wide
appreciation expressed of their work.
"Ve have arranged with our printers to
prepare covers for binding the first six numbers,
and also a comprehensive index. This will then
be our first volume completed. We might be
able to complete a second-perhaps not.
We left Frees with something like real regret,
for we had made many· friends in Whitchurch,
Market-Drayton, Chester, Shrewsbury and
district. Our parting with them after a
short six weeks' acquaintanceship was touched
with genuine sorrow. We found the Proud
Salopians jolly fine people, and they were
hospitality itself.· Manet alta mente repostum.
We hope to re-visit Frees-if not as a battalion,
then as individuals. \
... ... ... ... ...
When there are twelve bhoys in one twelve
foot diameter bell' tent, we admit
MSS. that the ensuing stir militates
against a deluge of MSS. We
observe that certain letters to certain people
in certain places aw duly written, and we
respectfully request that Mr. Outpost be not
forgotten, or rather slighted. All matter for
the August number should be in .our hands on
or about the 22nd July. Covers for the
Magazine binding may be purchased at IS. each,
including index, and the binding will be done by
our printers for sixpence. Anyone desirous of
becoming subscribers to The Outpost should
send 5S. to Sergeant A. F. FERGUSON, A Company,
and two copies of each issue will be posted
free to any address for six months. Application
for covers should be made to The Outpost
Finance Manager, or to our printers.
t t
Outpo.d."
1 7TH (sERVICE) BATTN. H.L.I.,
WENSLEY CAMP, YORKS.
~
Editor.
Sergeant STEVEN D. REITH, B Company.
Assistant Editor.
Pte. W. J. FRASER HUTCHESON, A Company.
Art Editor.
L..Corpl. JOHN CHAPMAN, A Company.
Finance Manager.
Sergeant ALEX. F. FERGUSON. A Company.
Gailes Representative.
Corpl. JOHN L. GRIFFITHS. E Company.
MAGAZI~E COMMITTEE.
B Coy.-
Pte. ROXBURGH and Pte. J. L. HARDIE.
C Coy.-
Sergt. DRUMMOND and Sergt. G. D. LUGTON.
D Coy.-
Sergt. ABERCROMBIE and Pte. WILLIAM STEWART.
The Outpost will be sent post free to any address
in the United Kingdom on receipt of 4!d. A
quarterly subscription of 2S. 6d. entitles the sub·
scriber to two copies of each issue. The Outpost
may be had in Glasgow from John Menzies & Co.,
Ltd., 96 West Nile Street; John Smith & Son,
19 Renfield Street; David Robertson & Co., Ltd.,
23 Gordon Street; Porteous & Co., Royal Exchange
Square; and at all Railway Station Bookstalls•
FULLARTON WOODS, TROON.