Untitled - ScholarWorks Home - California State University, Northridge
Untitled - ScholarWorks Home - California State University, Northridge
Untitled - ScholarWorks Home - California State University, Northridge
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��o Would you like to join uth?"<br />
"Who the hell?" I say, and am surprised at<br />
.�0;<br />
; the quiver in my voice. I sound afraid.<br />
§ And my phony mother cuts me with her eyes and puts a fin-<br />
Q)<br />
E ger to her suddenly pursed lips in a shh gesture. And I realize what<br />
0<br />
-; I've always known: That she likes Charity best because she failed<br />
� her most.<br />
()<br />
Q)<br />
-�<br />
And Bucky Tooth says, "Where are my mannerth? My name<br />
v' ith Tucker."<br />
b'<br />
So I say, "Mother Tucker." And my mom snaps and throws<br />
.,I<br />
Oci,,e � one of my sister's old, flattened square slippers at me and I laugh loud<br />
R<br />
to cover a new feeling creeping in that I can't name, and my mother, surely<br />
picking up on the tension I've brought, screams that Tucker is our cock sucking<br />
guardian angel and what kind of a degenerate am I anyway? At least that's<br />
what I hear.<br />
And I put my finger to my pursed lips and try to make her feel stupid,<br />
to go along with how she sounds and looks. And I say, "Mother, it's good to<br />
have you awake."<br />
Charity groans and narrows her eyes at me. She thinks I'm ruining<br />
everything. I meet her eyes and mimic her groan and tell her that everything's<br />
already been ruined.<br />
desperate.<br />
"Perhapth we're off to a bad thtart, Benjamin," Tucker says cheerful but<br />
"The name's Benny. Not Benjamin. Tucker, I don't know if mom has<br />
gotten to this part yet but I was named for her favorite drug. The benny." An<br />
outrageous lie, but I say it thoughtfully so it doesn't sound like one. 'Tm not<br />
sure why you're here," I continue, loudly, pouncing on every syllable with just<br />
the right amount of affect. "But, I assure you. You've got your work cut out for<br />
you." I lean against the frame of my sister's doorway; I cross my arms snug<br />
against my chest for punctuation and imagine I look imposing.<br />
"Benny, please. For me. Won't you, please," my sister says. "He's a<br />
gift. A gift from God. A real live manifestation of my prayers," she<br />
wheezes. She inhales as deeply as her body will allow and then really gets YJ<br />
.5l!<br />
going. "An angel sent from heaven! He's here to help with my, my re- -g<br />
cov-e-ree!" Chirp d1jrp. Cough cough.<br />
.:::;: �<br />
"Charity, Charity, pleath. You've got yourthelf in a dither,"<br />
�<br />
Tucker drones. He waves his hand across his torso stopping to stroke �<br />
()<br />
the message on hi chest. His index finger lingers on the glittery ��