Creating Circles and Ceremonies: Rituals for All ... - reading...

168 Creating Circles & Ceremonies
When a multiple marriage is successful, its fruits are bountiful: higher energy levels,
pooled resources, ecstatic sexual union, and most precious of all, a sense of freedom. This
freedom grows from the glad knowledge that no single partner has to meet all the needs of
another. Your mates are your allies in the pursuit of a joyous life. There are more hands to do
the work together, more shoulders to cry on, and more points of view with which to examine
the universe. When a multiple marriage is in difficulty, there are more systems to go wrong,
more lives at stake, and more hearts to be broken. In general the stakes are higher both ways;
the risks are greater but so are the rewards.
Multiple mates are pioneers on a road that leads to a new future in human community.
They must jettison all unnecessary cargo that holds them back: jealousy, possessiveness,
shame, righteousness, unhealthy addictions, antagonism, pettiness, and revenge are all poisonous
burdens that they cannot afford to bear. There will be bandits along the way who will
attack them for what they are, and sneak thieves in the night who will try to poison their well
or rob them of their bliss. They must hold onto each other as well as their resolve to reach
their goal.
Such a family will have a personality of its own. Oberon, Morning Glory, and Wolf are
a different energy dynamic than any of them separately or paired as two. The larger community
must learn to recognize and respect this group personality. And as this family grows,
each new person will change the group dynamic so that its collective persona will alter in a
fluid changing harmony – like a chorus that increases in power and beauty with each added
voice. This marriage will have to evolve systems to honor the smaller patterns within the
relationship as well as to embrace larger changes, for this will be a family of strong individuals
as well as powerful shifting magickal relationships.
Our community welcomes this marriage of bold pioneers and we honor their courage
and their efforts to give birth to a new entity that will grow and mature, and hopefully live far
beyond the span of years of its original creators; for such a family is a human creature with
immortal potential.
Poly Handfasting Components
(Here are but a few of the components that went into our triad handfasting
ten years ago; the entire rite is far too long to include here. —OZ )
HP: Dearly beloved, we are gathered together today to celebrate the sacred rites of
handfasting among Oberon, Morning
Glory, and Wolf. They have been joined
in love and life and they have learned to
work together in partnership, and to envision
and create new ways of living in
harmony. We are their friends and family,
and we have joined hands together
to create this sacred space to honor their
perfect love and trust. Here be magick;
here be love!
OZ (enters Circle to stand before altar):
One man alone is like a cripple bound to
his pillow, ennobled/humbled by the daily
discipline of conquering trivial detail, even
the lacing of boots a major challenge.
When does the one achieve more?
MG (enters Circle to stand at left of Oberon,
taking his hand):
Two may love serenely, with occasional
storms of high happiness, if the weather
and the times are with them, and chance
smiles on them, and death does not halve
them. When expectations are small, and
life benevolent, a two works well enough.
WOLF: (enters Circle to stand with Oberon
& Morning Glory, taking their hands):
Three restlessly seeks another mate like
water seeks the sea. But a triumvirate is
the freest of all marriages from conflict. A
chair with three legs does not wobble.
(—from Courtship Rite, by Donald Kingsbury)