Psychosocial Notebook - IOM Publications - International ...

Chapter 1 • Silvia Salvatici
her English and broadened her employable skills. She came away from
this experience with a still vivid sense of usefulness and power, of personal
and professional fulfilment, in sharp contrast to the “impression of
having just your soul, your body and nothing else”, that is often central in
refugees’ accounts. After her experience in the camp, it was easier for
Sadete to find a job within an international organization. Ever since
the day of that meeting in the refugee camp, Sadete has never stopped
working.
The massive presence of international organizations and NGOs is significant
in that it provides more women with new employment opportunities,
but also because it offers alternative models of feminine roles, even as the
women of Kosovo regain their freedom of movement, and even as newly
flourishing forms of entertainment are also changing the shapes and
rhythms of their daily lives. Lindita, Mimoza and Blerta are three friends
in their twenties, and living in Pristina. During the NATO bombings, they
were all refugees abroad, but came back immediately after the end of the
war. Since Mimoza and Blerta came back earlier than their families, the
three friends lived alone together and experienced a period of extraordinary
independence. In their words: “Well, our parents left us very free
even before, but in that period it was different… It was… It was very good.
Actually we felt sorry when our parents came back”. At the same time,
they were employed by different international agencies and their jobs gave
them a certain financial independence (only Mimoza gives a portion of her
salary to her family). While they had not planned to begin working before
completing their education, the war left them in a different environment,
where they were presented with opportunities they had never before imagined.
The three friends spend their free time in pubs, cafeterias, and nightclubs.
They told interviewers that they were trying to enjoy themselves, as
being “in the face of death” had taught them “what life is about: to feel free
to do what you feel like”.
Lindita, Mimoza and Blerta also felt that gender relations were different in
post-war Kosovo:
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Blerta: Three or four years ago here in Prishtina there were only
girls and only a small number of boys because many of them
were working abroad. I think at that time one boy had three
or four girlfriends.
Lindita: Maybe more! But now I think that it is just a habit of the
past. They used to have many girlfriends, for example most
of them used to go out for two weeks and then they broke up
and started with another one, so it was a habit. So, if you
managed to be with somebody longer than two weeks, it was
a good relationship. […] I think that the number now is
equal, it’s half-half, because many guys came back from