Psychosocial Notebook - IOM Publications - International ...

Chapter 4 • Nicola Mai
122
Subject: The same. On one side, we had Shqiptarian neighbours, and
on the other, there were the Serbs. And I can’t say anything
about those Shqiptars. Maybe they were richer, maybe richer
than we were, but they also helped us when we were in
crisis.
Child (7): Who? The Shqiptars?
Subject: Yes, son. When we were in crisis.
Child: No, no. They didn’t help us.
Subject: Yes, they did, son. Not this time. This time…But we were in
crisis. They had their own stores. We could freely go there,
too. There were no problems. But when we came here, I
can’t…We are living in a village called---- I can’t say anything
about the village…I would feel sorry if I said anything
bad about it.
[(J2):Serb woman, aged 35, tailor, from a village near an urban area, now
living with her husband and children in a private accommodation. Her
house in Kosovo has been destroyed, her uncle and her brother in law
were kidnapped and the son of her brother died. She has experienced solidarity
with Albanian families in times of hardship].
Subject: Well, for instance, my relationship towards some people –
towards Shiptars, generally. Since I, it may sound incredible,
stupid – I regretted and I was sorry when they left for
Albania. And the same people saw us off warmly, from the
same area, only a few months later. I don’t know, I had too
much confidence in those people. I mean, it never crossed
my mind that something like that could be expected from
them, all that happened – as if those were some other people,
as if they didn’t do it. I mean, I don’t hold it against them
much – it may sound like a paradox, I eat my own words, I
understand their wish for independence, and all that. I hold it
against us a lot more, ourselves as a nation, because I think
we’re terrible, I don’t know how to define it…
Question: What do you mean when you say we are terrible?
Subject: Well, it means envious, it’s unlikely that someone will help
you out when you need it the most. We are all great friends,
on paper at least, until you really ask for something of a
man. I don’t know, he won’t help, only if he has some interest
in doing it. Everything that happened came out of that.
Question: So, you think it happened because of all that?
Subject: Well, let’s say it is one of the reasons. Not the only one for
sure. The first and the essential one, certainly is the fact that
it suited someone, someone out there. None of us “normal”
people, so to speak, can judge why it would suit anyone, I
think it’s definitely so. All I know is that I’m a pawn in
somebody else’s game of chess, and I act accordingly.
[(E4) Serbian man, aged 24, from urban context. A former university student,
the subject had had a meaningful experience of harmonious multiethnic
coexistence in the urban neighbourhood he used to live in].