Genealogical notes of Barnstable families - citizen hylbom blog

GENEALOGICAL NOTES OF BARNSTABLE FAMILIES. 419
23. Ebenezer Gorham, the youngest son of James, resided
when a young man at Seituate. Nov. 1, 1725, he was dismissed
from the south church in that town, to the east church in Barnstable.
Sept. 22, 1727, he married Temperance Hawes, daughter of
Dea. Joseph of Yarmouth. He was a farmer, and his house stood
where Sylvanus Gorham's now stands. It was a large, two story
building, very ancient and may have been Joseph Hallett's, who
had a house very early on the same land. She died Feb. 21,
1767, in the 62d year of her age. He died Nov. 16, 1776, in the
83d year of his age. Both have monuments in the old graveyard
near the Unitarian Meeting House.
James Gorham was the richest man in Barnstable. His children
inherited that wealth ; but they did not inherit the art of
keeping it. Excepting Ebenezer, who appears to have been
brought up under different influences, they all died poor, some of
them insolvent. The poor boy who saves his little earnings forms
a habit of frugality, which he carries with him through life ; the
child of the wealthy does not feel the necessity of saving, and he
spends the little s.ums which his friends give him in toys, or in
vain amusements, and thus forms a habit which in its ultimate,
leads to poverty. In a free country, where the institution of slavery
is not tolerated, and where the estates of deceased intestate
persons are divided equally to all the children, these causes are in
constant operation, changing the relative position of families
every two or three generations. I have had in these articles, frequent
occasion to say that "the wealth of the parent was a curse
to his posterity." Physiological reasons afford a sufficient explanation.
The boy who is brought up in ease and affluence, whose
every want is provided for, when he becomes a man is often lacking
in energy of character,—he has not been taught to be self-reliant,
the great secret of success in life, in consequence, the son
of his poor neighbor, who has been taught to be frugal and industrious,
and above all, to believe that he must rely on himself, outstrips
the other in ttie race of life, and in old age, they find that
their relative positions in society have been reversed. This is
generally, not universally true ; for some wealthy parents teach
their children to be frugal, industrious and self-reliant, and they
thereby escape the perils to which they would otherwise be exposed.
Such boys make distinguished men—they start from a
higher stand-point—rhave the advantage of a good education—and
of friends who are able to assist them.
Lieut. Col. John Gorham, the brother of James, was his
neighbor. As has been stated, he ranked next to his brother in
point of wealth, both had large families, and both had the same
facilities to educate their children ; but no two families in Barn-
stable were more unlike. John was a mechanic and a military
man, he had traveled more and had seen more of the world than
James. The old school philosophers tell us the difference is to be