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"California would be a good place," Pacey said. Dawson gave one nervous cough and plunged in. "California. Okay. Well, I took Joey to California with me, and I knew she wasn't really happy at first, but I really believed that she would be okay once we got out there, you know? Somehow she'd get in the sun, and she'd sort of perk up." Pacey nodded slowly. "Like a plant." Dawson shook his head and smiled ruefully. "I walked into that one, I guess." He fidgeted and looked at the ground. "Look, I was wrong to ask her to come with me to California. I knew -- I mean, I didn't consciously know, but I knew on the inside, I think -- that everything with her dad had her so crazy that she wasn't exactly going to make the best possible decisions on a day-to-day basis. Just the fact that she wasn't going to go to school . . . it was crazy, you know?" Dawson searched Pacey's face for a sign, but there seemed to be nothing yet. "And I think," he continued, nodding slowly, "that I also knew that she wanted to be back here with you." Pacey looked at Dawson quizzically. "Then how could you put her on that plane with you, Dawson?" "I put her on the plane because . . . " He glanced over his shoulder at Joey, who was inside dancing with Jack. She suddenly seemed incredibly far away, unrecognizable to him in her red dress and heels, so impossibly happy. "I put her on the plane because I hoped I was wrong, I guess. And because it seemed like it was so right that it couldn't possibly be as wrong as the signs all suggested it was." "I thought you just didn't see those signs," Pacey said, staring out into the dark. "I saw them." Dawson laughed. "I ignored them, but I saw them. I sort of hoped that <strong>by</strong> making it my full-time job to prove they were false, I might actually make it happen." "That's the part I've never understood." Pacey turned a little to face Dawson, leaning against an iron railing at the patio's edge. "Why you thought you could change how she felt." Dawson put his hands in his pockets and scraped the patio stones with his toe. Finally, he looked up at Pacey. "Give me a minute. I'm trying to think of something that sounds better than 'unbridled arrogance and a twisted notion of the nobility of unending pursuit.'" This, to his great relief, made Pacey chuckle. "I think," Dawson went on, "that everybody has always understood that Joey relied on me and my family for a lot, you know, because of how crazy everything was at her house when she was a kid. But I'm not sure they ever really get how much I relied on her, and how much it threw me when she walked away from me." Now, he had Pacey's attention. "Go on." "In one fell swoop," Dawson said, gesturing broadly, "you and Joey made me obsolete in each other's lives. She didn't need me as the boyfriend, because she had you. You
didn't need me as the best friend, because you had Joey. So the happier the two of you looked, the more I felt like everything was sliding out from under me." Pacey considered this for a minute. "You know, though, that we both would have enormously preferred not to have you disappear? That we both would rather have had you around for the last couple of years." "It's like I said before, I was wrong." Dawson looked up and locked eyes with Pacey. "I want to make it right." Pacey sighed heavily. "I'm glad, Dawson. I am. I know how much it means to Joey, and it means a lot to me, too." "I have a feeling you're about to say 'but.'" "But it's not that simple." Pacey looked past Dawson, into the party, and saw Joey being dipped <strong>by</strong> a laughing Jack. A warm rush of affection flooded him. "She's quite a girl, Dawson, but she's really not the issue." Dawson blinked. "What do you mean?" "I mean," Pacey continued, "that the problems between us go back a lot farther than Joey. I mean that we weren't okay before I got together with her. I mean that there are old wounds there, and it's going to take some time. I don't want to be the poster boy for Junior Underachievement, and I don't think you want to carry the banner for the Quiet Hero Society, so . . . " "So what?" "Well, so we have to figure out whether, when you tear all that crap down, there's anything left." Dawson raised his eyebrows a little, but couldn't argue. Just then, Joey, breathless from a heady combination of dancing and laughing, came toward them. "Hey, you two," she said hopefully. "What's this little tête-à-tête all about?" Pacey put an arm around her and pulled her to him. "Dawson and I were just talking about how amazing you look in that dress, and how much we both want to dance with you next." She looked back and forth between the two of them. "And what did you decide?" "You two go ahead," Dawson said quickly. "Really, go. Have fun." Joey took Pacey's hand and started toward the doors, but he pulled her back. "No. No, Joey and I have plenty of time to talk. Besides, the girl's got two left feet. You'd be doing me a favor, man." He picked up Joey's hand and kissed the inside of her wrist. "Go on," he said softly, looking in her eyes and tilting his head back toward the party.
Page 1 and 2:
Disclaimers: Nope, don't own them.
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what she really wants, and you know
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Joey suddenly felt the crush of sil
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"It was weird," Jen mused. "I reall
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Pacey, on the other hand, was usual
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Jack held up his hands in defeat. "
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Jack and Jen both turned around to
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"Pacey, it's really good to see you
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Pacey would spend the next twenty y
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"You are not." He grinned again. "A
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How sad, she somehow had the time t
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he repeated. At this, she smiled, a
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*** Joey's mind wandered back to Th
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"You did. You thought I didn't want
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"Because if you didn't have that lo
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"You and I are meant to be, Jo." It
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*** part seven: pass When the phone
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"No." Joey stared out the window de
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It was cold, even for January, and
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He froze. "Is that the real reason?
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"Then why didn't you just get the h
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He wanted to take it back. It was t
Page 45 and 46: "Hello?" "Jen?" "Pacey?" "Yeah, yea
Page 47 and 48: "I'm crazy about you, Lindley, you
Page 49 and 50: This was a development Dawson hadn'
Page 51 and 52: pouncing on her mouth and kissing h
Page 53 and 54: "Well," Dawson said, picking up his
Page 55 and 56: "Thank you." He tossed the messages
Page 57 and 58: "What happened?" She leaned forward
Page 59 and 60: "And eventually she made the last a
Page 61 and 62: Jen suddenly could hear herself bre
Page 63 and 64: "Well, I'm proud of you." For some
Page 65 and 66: He scratched his head. "Well, I'm n
Page 67 and 68: "And how is the blushing bride?" Pa
Page 69 and 70: Pacey narrowed his eyes. "You'd rat
Page 71 and 72: on her brave face and tried to pull
Page 73 and 74: it's the perfect moment if you were
Page 75 and 76: "Have I ever told you that I find e
Page 77 and 78: "This is taking more than five minu
Page 79 and 80: They both laughed, low and throaty,
Page 81 and 82: Jen swallowed hard. "And you're tel
Page 83 and 84: She closed her eyes again, and list
Page 85 and 86: He put his feet on the coffee table
Page 87 and 88: "Joey?" Jen put a hand on Joey's ar
Page 89 and 90: inadvertent right cross. Seeing him
Page 91 and 92: "The buddy. The friend. The famous
Page 93 and 94: But not me, she thought with a nost
Page 95: them, sweeping them into something
Page 99 and 100: "I feel bad," he said simply. "I fe
Page 101 and 102: He leaned over and brushed his lips
Page 103 and 104: She turned to look at him again, st
Page 105 and 106: Jen reached into the car through th
Page 107 and 108: "You never will, either. Just anoth
Page 109 and 110: The West coast had the sand and the
Page 111 and 112: "Me, too." She hit the button, drop
Page 113 and 114: "Yes." She nodded slowly. "I was fe
Page 115 and 116: Jen's eyes widened. "It -- it doesn
Page 117 and 118: One of Pacey's eyes popped open. "I
Page 119 and 120: day reminding himself -- in a way t
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