December 2004 Ensign - The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day ...

More documents

Recommendations

Info

42 QUESTIONS ANSWERS Question I am an elderly woman, and due to my fragile health, I recently came to live with my daughter and her family. It has been difficult to leave behind my friends, my home, and especially my independence. I know it hasn’t been easy for my daughter’s family either. What can we do to make the change easier for all of us? Tips for Those Moving In with Family When at age 82 I moved in with my daughter and her husband, I made a conscious decision that I would not mourn, that I would accept the decision cheerfully, and that I would look forward to new adventures. I discovered that many of my “precious things” were just stuff, and as I unloaded them, I felt a freedom that was wonderful. I sold my home and thought of all the freedom from upkeep and repairs. A burden was lifted off my shoulders. I now keep busy by writing letters and working on my autobiography. I sort and place my photographs in albums. I go for walks. I subscribe to several good magazines. I invite friends to drop by. I teach the Beehives in the Young Women organization, and my daughter and I are visiting teaching companions. It is important for me to feel useful around the house. I help make lunch and prepare dinner most evenings. Other tasks I help with include doing the laundry, folding clothes, watering houseplants, and dusting furniture. Dorothy L. Clark, Rainier Ward, Rainier Oregon Stake One advantage to growing older is that your pool of people to love grows larger. Keep in touch with the old friends you left behind by writing letters, making phone calls, and planning visits. Make new friends in your daughter’s neighborhood. If there is a senior citizens’ center nearby, take advantage of it. However, do not limit yourself to the elderly. Many young people find great satisfaction in associating with those who are the age of their grandparents and great-grandparents. Another advantage to aging is that you continue to amass memories to Meaningful hobbies can help make life rich and interesting. cherish. Your home you left behind is probably not the first one you have moved from. Each home from your past can become a memory to hold dear. Colleen Young Staker, Jordan North Fourth Ward, Salt Lake Jordan North Stake We cared for my mother-in-law for almost a year before her death. These are the things I appreciated most about her: She was never bossy or demanding with our children or me. With five children there, our home got noisy and crazy sometimes, but she was slow to correct or complain.
She left the disciplining of the children to me or my husband. Instead, she always encouraged them or helped them with their homework. She would ask them about their day and listen intently as they talked. She was a peacemaker and could help our young boys change the subject and forget their quarrels. I loved the talks we had when she and I were home alone during the day. And she knew just when to insist on buying pizza for dinner! Because of her gracious and loving ways, it was a joy to have her in our home. Debra Thiemann, Pocatello Eighth Branch, Pocatello Idaho West Stake I am living with my oldest daughter and her husband. When she asked me to live with them, the first thing I decided was that in no way would I come between them. For example, they’ve always sat by each other in their car. When I go somewhere with them, they want me to sit in the front seat. Though it would be easier to get into the front, I stubbornly say, “No, I’d rather sit in the back,” and I’m in before they know it. They’re both together in the front. I know they need time together for private conversations. They both work full-time and have various activities, so they come and go at different times. When they’re both home, I make myself scarce for the next 30 or 40 minutes. Many times they go out to dinner or a show and invite me to go with them. Occasionally I do, but more often I excuse myself so they can have a real date together. All married couples need private time together. They have managed to live without my help for years; hence I learned early on to never question PHOTOGRAPH BY CHRISTINA SMITH Home teachers and visiting teachers can help elderly ward members feel loved and valued. their decisions or give suggestions unless the subject involves me or they request my help. I was given a mouth that closes and ears that don’t. So I just listen and observe. It’s surprising what I can learn. Helen L. Baird, Mount Vernon Ward, Mount Vernon Virginia Stake When my husband’s parents moved into our home, several factors made the transition easier for us, including the following: 1. His parents never acted as though we owed them anything. They received even the smallest favors with gratitude, despite the awkwardness they may have felt in accepting them. Their gratitude made it much easier for us to give. 2. Our ward leaders gave our family Through participation in Church callings, many elderly members become a positive influence in others’ lives. PHOTOGRAPH BY JOHN LUKE ENSIGN DECEMBER 2004 43
Page 1 and 2: T H E C H U R C H O F J E S U S C H
Page 3 and 4: 28 Making Weak Things Become Strong
Page 5 and 6: F I R S T P R E S I D E N C Y M E S
Page 7 and 8: “The girl sang with all the convi
Page 9 and 10: PHOTOGRAPH © PHOTODISC; BEHOLD MY
Page 11 and 12: THE LIVING CHRIST THE TESTIMONY OF
Page 13 and 14: efore the Lord so that your weaknes
Page 15 and 16: ILLUSTRATED BY GREG RAGLAND [and] w
Page 17 and 18: Up until a few years ago, I was a f
Page 19 and 20: Searching for Answers A few days af
Page 21 and 22: JOSEPH, I WILL NOT LEAVE YOU, BY TH
Page 23 and 24: ORGANIZATION OF THE RELIEF SOCIETY,
Page 25 and 26: the ground bleeding, waiting for a
Page 27 and 28: Prayer with this comment: “Your F
Page 29 and 30: etween her and her parents would be
Page 31 and 32: it: “Because thou hast seen thy w
Page 33 and 34: RIGHT: PHOTOGRAPH BY BUSATH PHOTOGR
Page 35 and 36: “I’m not going through this lif
Page 37 and 38: On each anniversary of her accident
Page 39 and 40: PHOTOGRAPHY BY JOHN LUKE, EXCEPT AS
Page 41 and 42: Be Flexible Watch-care is certainly
Page 43: BACKGROUND: PHOTOGRAPH BY JOHN LUKE
Page 47 and 48: wisdom. And he gave us an opportuni
Page 49 and 50: BY JANENE WOLSEY BAADSGAARD Ithink
Page 51 and 52: their children, having grandchildre
Page 53 and 54: discourage parents from placing the
Page 55 and 56: CROSS-STITCH RE-CREATED BY KATHLEEN
Page 57 and 58: BY LORRAINE F. DAY Christmas c a m
Page 59 and 60: I never expected my teenage daughte
Page 61 and 62: ILLUSTRATED BY DANIEL LEWIS Christm
Page 63 and 64: One evening just before Christmas I
Page 65 and 66: eason. Such was the case with Elder
Page 67 and 68: ILLUSTRATED BY JOE FLORES; SILHOUET
Page 69 and 70: New Temple Presidents and Matrons B
Page 71 and 72: PHOTOGRAPH COURTESY OF CHURCH NEWS
Page 73 and 74: INDEX for 2004 V O L U M E 34 Key t
Page 75 and 76: Reaching Spencer, Emma Jo Anderson,
Page 77 and 78: JESUS CHRIST Atonement and the Valu
Page 79 and 80: Perpetual Education Fund: A Bright
Page 81 and 82: Outnumbered, Paolo Martin N. Macari
Page 83 and 84: MAY NOT BE COPIED Holiday Glow, by

December 2004 Ensign - The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day ...

Create successful ePaper yourself

Delete template?

Save as template?