Conversations with Avant-garde Sages - The Wizard LLC

Conversations with Avant-garde Sages
But to accept it, to accept it, because when you accept it, what real
love is which is what we are, it's seamless, and that doesn't start
flickering. And the desires are shown to be what they are, it's just
desires. And that becomes self-evident, nobody has to tell you
anything, it's self-evident. And I hear you, and I'm thankful for my
own bitter fierce grace there.
PAUL NAGY: Your explanation of the issues that you went
through in adapting to your current relationship was very similar
structurally to what you're talking about beliefs earlier, right. And
you said, but your prescription for beliefs was, and you gave your
prescription for beliefs. Here you said you had to engage with
these changes of belief, you see, and you worked with them, and
you changed them, and in that way you had a stability, which will
destabilize over time in a variety of ways, they're always
unexpected. But that's the dance of love. And myself, I've been
through umpteen relationships, none of them last more than a few
months, because I'm such a jerk. And so I decided that in order to
have a true and fulfilling love life, because I'm such a jerk, I had to
learn that I had to go to the source of love, which is that abiding
simple true awareness, and radical acceptance. That's the source,
so I can love everybody but don't, as long as I don't have to relate,
gee, don't ask me to do that, it's not for very long.
BRIAN ADLER: What I found is that's what relationship is great
for, is it's a place, it's one thing to say like an affirmation, I am
abiding in infinite love as the source or whatever, I don't. But to
actually rest in our experience as it is which is what you're talking
about, not just in an easy moment when we're in a cave or on a
hill, or watching the sunset, but in a moment when our lover is
telling us something that deeply insults our preferences and
expectations about how things should be. In that moment, to be
willing to notice that it's my own thinking about how things should
be that is obstructing my experience of being, my enjoyment of
life, it's got nothing to do with her.
I actually think they work hand in hand to the extent that I am
resting in and relying on the enjoyment of my own existence, in
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