Conversations with Avant-garde Sages - The Wizard LLC

Conversations with Avant-garde Sages
today as always is the Wizard Baldour. You finally reframed your
father's once painfully experienced shortcomings as actually
blessings, and it really felt great. I think it was a transformative
shift for you, can you elaborate on that?
RICHARD YOUNG: Yes. I suppose we all grow up with at least
one problematic parent, or at least what we define as a
problematic parent, and for me it was my father. My father was a
very harsh man at times, he had a terrible temper, and as the
oldest of three sons I seemed to be the most common target for
that temper, and there was some physical abuse even through the
years. And so I grew up with a deep sense of disconnection from
him, and anger quite frankly, for how I felt he treated me through
the years. And I struggled with that on and off, I think it was a
dynamic in my personality that eventually bore fruit, but it was
certainly something that I struggled with early on. I couldn't tell
you why or how this came about, but there just came a time; I
think it was because as he started ageing and growing feeble, and I
just started seeing him differently. And I came to understand that,
what, he did the best he could do, he really just did the best he
knew how to do. And it wasn't my best, hopefully I was better as a
father, but , my sons someday are going to look back and see all
the faults that I have [Laughs]. I always kid them and say, “guys
don't worry, when that day comes, I've been saving up, I didn't
save up for your college, but I saved up for therapy, so you guys
can go and hash it out with your therapist".
So nobody's perfect, and I made mistakes, my father made
mistakes, and we're all just human and doing the best we can. So
that made it possible for me to just forgive him and let it go. And
then I began to see what things I was because of that man, who I
was because of him, and then I could honor that, I could honor
him and I could honor that in me that is part of him, and that
came from him and his influence. But I think I had to first get past
the anger and the bitterness and let go of all of that.
WIZARD: A good friend of ours, V. Ganesan, who is Ramana
Maharshi's grand nephew, shared with us one time that every
607