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Chapter Ten
Unborn Child
During this time, King Suddhodana expressed the desire to have Siddhartha spend more time at his side so that he could instruct his son in
political and courtly affairs. The prince was invited to attend many official meetings, sometimes alone with the king, at other times with the
king’s court. Siddhartha gave his full attention to these affairs, and he came to understand that the political, economic, and military problems
that beset any kingdom had their roots in the selfish ambitions of those involved in politics. Concerned only with protecting their own
power, it was impossible for them to create enlightened policies for the common good. When Siddhartha saw corrupt officials feign virtue
and morality, anger filled his heart. But he concealed it, as he did not have any alternatives to offer.
“Why don’t you contribute ideas at court instead of always sitting so silently?” King Suddhodana asked one day after a long meeting
with several officials.
Siddhartha looked at his father. “It is not that I haven’t ideas, but it would be useless to state them. They only point to the disease. I do
not yet see a cure for the selfish ambitions of those in the court. Look at Vessamitta, for example. He holds an impressive amount of power
at court, yet you know he is corrupt. More than once he has tried to encroach upon your authority, but you are still forced to depend on his
services. Why? Because you know if you don’t, chaos will break loose.”
King Suddhodana looked at his son silently for a long moment. Then he spoke. “Siddhartha, you know well that in order to maintain
peace in one’s family and country, there are certain things one must tolerate. My own power is limited, but I am sure that if you prepared
yourself to be king, you would do far better than I have. You possess the talent needed to purge the ranks of corruption while preventing
chaos in our homeland.”
Siddhartha sighed. “Father, I do not think it is a question of talent. I believe the fundamental problem is to liberate one’s own heart and
mind. I too am trapped by feelings of anger, jealousy, fear, and desire.”
Similar exchanges between father and son made King Suddhodana grow increasingly anxious. He recognized that Siddhartha was a
person of unusual depth, and he saw how differently he and his son viewed the world. Still, he fostered the hope that over time, Siddhartha
would come to accept his role and fill it in a most worthy way.
In addition to his duties at court and assisting Yasodhara, Siddhartha continued to meet and study with well-known brahmans and
monks. He knew that the pursuit of religion was not just the study of the holy scriptures but included the practice of meditation to attain
liberation for one’s heart and mind, and he sought to learn more about meditation. He applied all that he learned in these studies to his own
life in the palace, and he shared these insights with Yasodhara.
“Gopa,” Siddhartha liked to call Yasodhara affectionately, “perhaps you should also practice meditation. It will bring peace to your heart
and enable you to continue your work for a long time.”
Yasodhara followed his advice. No matter how busy her work kept her, she reserved time for meditation. Husband and wife often sat
together silently. At such times, their attendants left them alone, and the couple asked their musicians and dancers to go perform elsewhere.
Husband and wife often sat together silently.