old-path-white-clouds-thich-nhat-hanh

One bhikkhu wiped his tears and answered, “Lord, we have just come from Bamboo Forest. On the road we met brothers Sariputta
and Moggallana. When we asked them where they were headed, they said they were crossing over to Gayasisa. We are so upset we
cannot hold back our tears. More than five hundred other bhikkhus have abandoned the sangha, but we never expected your two most
esteemed disciples to forsake you.”
The Buddha smiled and comforted the bhikkhus by saying, “Bhikkhus, do not grieve. The Tathagata trusts Sariputta and Moggallana.
They will not betray the sangha.”
Eased, the bhikkhus sat quietly at the Buddha’s feet.
The following day, Jivaka invited the Buddha for a meal offering at his Mango Grove. Venerable Ananda accompanied the Buddha.
When they were finished eating, Jivaka informed them that Queen Videhi happened to be visiting. He wondered if the Buddha would mind
meeting with her. The Buddha understood that Jivaka had secretly arranged this meeting to take place, and he asked Jivaka to summon the
former queen.
After she bowed to the Buddha, the queen began to sob. The Buddha let her ease her pain and then he gently said, “Please tell me
everything.”
The queen said, “Lord, King Bimbisara’s life is in grave danger. Ajatasattu plans to starve him to death. He won’t allow me to bring any
more food to my husband.”
She told the Buddha that when the king had first been placed under house arrest, she had been allowed to bring him food each day.
Then one day the guards confiscated the tray of food she was bringing to the king before allowing her to enter his chambers. She told the
Buddha how, even though she wept, Bimbisara had consoled her and told her that he bore no hatred towards their son for his actions. He
said he would rather suffer hunger than have the country plunged into war. The next morning, the queen hid small rice balls in her hair while
also carrying a platter of food. The guards took away the platter, but the rice in her hair went undetected. She managed to feed her
husband in such a manner for several days. But when the king did not die, Ajatasattu ordered the guards to more thoroughly search the
queen. They discovered the hidden rice, and she was no longer able to bring him food that way.
Three days later she devised another plan. She mixed a paste of milk, honey, and flour which she spread over her body after bathing and
drying herself. When the paste was dry, she put on her clothes. When the guards found no rice in her hair, they allowed her to enter the
king’s chamber. Once inside, she undressed and scraped off the paste to feed him. She had fed her husband twice now in this manner, but
she feared she would soon be discovered and forbidden to visit him at all.
The former queen began to sob again. The Buddha sat silently. After a long moment, he asked about the king’s state of health, both
physical and spiritual. The queen said that although he had lost a lot of weight, his strength was holding up, and his spirit was most elevated.
He expressed no feelings of hatred or regret. He continued to smile and carry on a conversation as if nothing had happened. He was using
his time as a prisoner to practice meditation. There was a long corridor in his chamber where he did walking meditation. The room also had
a window which faced Vulture Peak. He gazed at the mountain everyday for long periods and did his sitting meditation at the same
window.
The Buddha asked the queen whether or not she had been able to send news to her brother King Pasenadi. She replied that she had no
means to do so. The Buddha said he would send a bhikkhu to Savatthi and ask King Pasenadi to help her any way he could.
The queen thanked the Buddha. She then confided how before Prince Ajatasattu was born, the royal astrologers predicted he would
betray his father. One day during her pregnancy she was suddenly seized with a bizarre urge to bite King Bimbisara’s finger and suck his
blood. She was frightened and shocked by her desire, unable to believe she could give rise to so terrible a thought. From the time she was
a little girl, she had always been afraid of the sight of blood and could not even bear to watch a fish or chicken slaughtered. Yet on that day
she desired nothing more than to taste her husband’s blood. She struggled against her urge with all her strength until she finally burst into
tears. Overcome with shame, she covered her face in her hands but would not tell the king what was disturbing her. One day not long after
that, King Bimbisara accidentally cut his finger while peeling a piece of fruit. Unable to control herself, the queen grabbed his finger and
sucked the drops of blood. The king was startled but he did not stop her. Then the queen collapsed to the floor and sobbed. Alarmed, the
king helped her up and asked her what the matter was. She told him of her strange and terrible desire. She told him how she had struggled
against it but had finally been defeated. She knew that the baby growing within her was the source of her violent urge.
The royal astrologers suggested the baby be aborted or killed at birth. King Bimbisara could not agree to such a thing and neither could
the queen. When the prince was born, they named him Ajatasattu which means “the enemy not born.”
The Buddha advised the queen to visit her husband only once every two or three days to prevent arousing Ajatasattu’s suspicions. She
could spend a longer time with him on the days she did visit him. He also suggested that the king eat only a small amount of the nourishing
paste at a time in order to save some for the days the queen did not visit. After offering these suggestions to the queen, the Buddha bid
farewell to Jivaka and returned to Vulture Peak.