old-path-white-clouds-thich-nhat-hanh

Chapter Forty-Four
The Elements Will Recombine
One day Meghiya spoke to the Buddha about Nanda’s unhappiness as a monk. Nanda had confided to Meghiya how much he missed his
fiancée in Kapilavatthu. Nanda said, “I still remember the day I carried the Buddha’s bowl back to Nigrodha Park. As I was leaving,
Janapada Kalyani looked into my eyes and said, ‘Hurry back. I will be waiting for you.’ I can so clearly recall the sheen of her black hair as
it brushes her slender shoulders. Her image often arises during my sitting meditation. Every time I see her in my mind, I am filled with
longing. I am not happy being a monk.”
The next afternoon, the Buddha invited Nanda to go for a walk with him. They left Jetavana and headed towards a distant hamlet located
by a lake. They sat on a large boulder that overlooked the crystal clear water. A family of ducks swam by leisurely. Birds sang in the
overhanging branches of trees.
The Buddha said, “Some of our brothers have told me that you are not happy living the life of a bhikkhu. Is that true?”
Nanda was silent. After a moment, the Buddha asked, “Do you feel ready to return to Kapilavatthu to prepare to take over the throne?”
Nanda replied hastily, “No, no. I have already told everyone that I do not like politics. I know I don’t have the ability to rule a kingdom.
I do not wish to become the next king.”
“Then why are you unhappy being a bhikkhu?”
Again Nanda was silent.
“Do you miss Kalyani?”
Nanda blushed but he did not speak.
The Buddha said, “Nanda, there are many young women here in Kosala as beautiful as your Kalyani. Do you remember the reception
we attended at King Pasenadi’s palace? Did you notice any women there as pretty as Kalyani?”
Nanda admitted, “Perhaps there are young women here as pretty as she is. But I care only for Kalyani. In this life there is only one
Kalyani.”
“Nanda, attachment can be a great barrier to spiritual practice. The physical beauty of a woman fades as surely as the beauty of a rose.
You know that all things are impermanent. You must learn to penetrate the impermanent nature of things. Look.” The Buddha pointed to an
old woman leaning on a cane and hobbling across the bamboo bridge. Her face was covered with wrinkles.
“That old woman was surely once a beauty. Kalyani’s beauty will also fade with the years. During that same time your search for
enlightenment could bring peace and joy for this life and lives to come. Nanda, look at the two monkeys playing over on that branch. You
might not find the female attractive with her long, pointed snout and red bottom, but to the male she is the most beautiful monkey on earth.
To him she is unique and he would sacrifice his very life to protect her. Can you see that—”
Nanda interrupted the Buddha. “Please don’t say anything more. I understand what you are trying to say. I will devote myself more
wholeheartedly to my practice.”
The Buddha smiled at his younger brother. “Pay special attention to observing your breath. Meditate on your body, feelings, mental
formations, consciousness, and objects of your consciousness. Look deeply in order to see the process of birth, growth, and fading of
every phenomenon, from your own body, emotions, mind, and objects of your mind. If there is anything you don’t understand, come and
ask me or Sariputta. Nanda, remember that the happiness liberation brings is true, unconditional happiness. It can never be destroyed.
Aspire to that happiness.”
The sky was growing dark. The Buddha and Nanda stood and walked back to the monastery.
Jetavana now hosted a strong and stable monastic life. The number of bhikkhus living there had risen to five hundred. The following year
the Buddha returned to Vesali for the retreat season. The Licchavi princes had transformed Great Forest into a monastery. They had built a
two-story Dharma hall with a roof, which they named Kutagara. A number of smaller buildings were scattered throughout the forest of sal
trees. The princes were the sponsors of the retreat season with generous contributions from Ambapali.
Bhikkhus throughout Magadha and as far away as Sakya gathered to spend the retreat season there with the Buddha. They numbered
six hundred in all. Lay disciples traveled to spend the rainy season there, as well, in order to receive the Buddha’s teaching. They brought
daily food offerings and attended all the Dharma talks.