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THE EDUCATION OF AYN RAND, 1905–1943
On some level Rand realized that her infatuation with Nietzsche,
however inspirational, was damaging to her creativity. The idea of the
Superman had lodged in her mind with problematic force. She struggled
to resist: “Try to forget yourself—to forget all high ideas, ambitions,
superman and so on. Try to put yourself into the psychology of
ordinary people, when you think of stories.” 38 Convinced of her own
worth yet stymied by her low position, Rand alternated between despair
and mania.
When she began writing to her family again after a long lapse, Anna
was shocked at the dark tone that had crept into her letters. She sensed
that Rand’s expectations were part of the problem, reminding her
daughter that success would not come without a struggle: “Your talent is
very clearly and fi rmly established. Your gift manifested itself very early
in life and long ago. Your talent is so clear that eventually it will break
through and spurt like a fountain.” 39 As her mother intuited, Rand’s
silence was due in part to her fear of disappointing her family. They had
pinned their hopes on her, and after such a promising start Rand had
little to report.
She did, however, have one success to share: a new husband. After
a year of regular dates Rand moved out of the Studio Club into a furnished
room that afforded her and Frank more privacy. Soon she began
pushing for marriage, reminding Frank that after several extensions her
visa was soon to expire. They were married in 1929, the year of the Great
Crash. A few months later Rand applied for citizenship as Mrs. Frank
O’Connor.
As it turned out, Rand’s stories about dashing heiresses and feckless
suitors proved a useful meditation for her marriage to Frank. A struggling
actor, he had always worked episodically and the economic depression
made jobs even more diffi cult to fi nd. Rand was the breadwinner
from the start. Soon after their marriage she was hired as a fi ling clerk in
the wardrobe department at RKO Radio Pictures after another Russian
employed there had given her a lead on the job. Focused, organized,
and desperate for work, Rand was an ideal employee. Within a year she
had risen to head of the department and was earning a comfortable
salary, which allowed the newlyweds to establish a stable life together.
They owned a collie and an automobile and lived in an apartment large
enough to accommodate long-term guests. When close friends of the
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