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“Lesson Number Two: Accepting your boyfriend for
who he truly is, instead of wishing, manipulating, forcing,
begging, tricking him into becoming the guy you want him
to be, is the formula for a happy relationship. Choosing a
guy for his ‘potential’ is a recipe for disaster.”
An older gentleman eating alone at a table next to ours
must have overheard because he catches Aunt Marty’s gaze
and winks. In true Goddess fashion, she smiles slyly and
winks right back.
“Next,” she leans close to us, “never forget that a guy
will tell you exactly who he is and what he wants right off
the bat. You have to learn how to hear him. You also have to
believe what you hear. For instance, he won’t come out and
say, ‘I’ll cheat on you the moment I have the chance,’ but he
will say, ‘Rock stars have it made.’ He won’t say, ‘I don’t
want to talk about it,’ but he’ll instantly change the subject.
He may not say the words, ‘I’m sorry,’ but he’ll buy you
flowers. We are the ones who demand specific words. Who
says words are the only way to communicate?”
New York’s Goddess of Love spreads her pink linen
napkin on her lap and smoothes it flat with her hands. Like
Mini-Martys, we do exactly the same thing. In the soft light
of Le Bistro, my aunt looks like a movie star.
“Love,” she says, caressing the glass stem, “is what you
feel when someone makes you happy with yourself. Show a
man how to love himself and he will adore you. Love is the
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