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have difficulty obtaining a person who is willing to officiate. Most Christian
and Jewish clergy would not be willing to conduct a Pagan ritual. Some ways of
finding a cooperative presider are:
Ministers from congregations affiliated with the Unitarian Universalist Association will
frequently perform ceremonies that are written by the couple;
some even require it. 4 Since the UUA recognizes Neopaganism as one of the
sources of its religious and spiritual traditions, many of its clergy should
not object to conducting a Pagan ritual. Some Neopagan priests and priestesses have
been able to obtain a license to marry by presenting various legal documents which show
that they have been selected by their coven as their clergyperson. This process sometimes
takes persistence.
Some Neopagan priestesses and priests register as clergy with Universal Life Church,
and are subsequently able to obtain a state or provincial license to officiate at marriages.
5 The Universal Life Church has minimal requirements for ordination.
What happens at a Neopagan handfasting?
In some ways, a handfasting is much like a typical marriage. The couple, a presider,
friends and family are present. The couple exchange vows and (usually) rings. The
couple usually has some attendants to assist in the ceremony. The presider, and the
handfasting party sign the wedding license. Pictures are taken. Everybody smiles and
hugs.
But in some ways a handfasting is quite different from the typical marriage
ceremony. Most couples designed a unique ritual which fits their needs. Some
of the following components may be present, in any order that the couple feels
comfortable with. A heterosexual handfasting ceremony is described below; the
text can easily be modified for a same-sex couple. Some of the statements and
the ritual of casting and banishing the circle would be modified to match the
Wiccan tradition that the couple follows:
The date may be chosen to be near a full moon. Handfastings during the month of May
are rare because that is the month of the union of the Goddess and God. (Most Wiccans
are duotheistic: they believe in two deities, one female and the other male.
The ceremony is often held outdoors; preferably in a wooded area; ideally at a
crossroads. A backup location is selected in the case of rain. The bride will not be
dressed in a traditional wedding gown. The couple will wear attractive clothes for the
ceremony. The bride often wears red. A circle is formed on the ground with rocks,
crystals or some other marker. It is large enough to handle then entire wedding party, and
guests, with plenty of empty space. Candles will mark the four cardinal directions. An
altar is located near the center of the circle. It is large enough to support the marriage
documents; a knife; chalice; a cloth, rope or ribbon; a small silver box and a trowel! A
broomstick is laid beside the altar. Wildflowers may be spread inside the circle. The
bridal couple stands to the east of the circle. They wear circlets of flowers. Friends and
family are gathered around
the circle.
The presider rings a bell three times to indicate the start of the ritual and to demarcate
divisions within the handfasting ceremony. The couple approaches the circle from the
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