From Ignorance to Innocence - Osho - Oshorajneesh.com

CHAPTER 22. THE COMMUNE: THE DISTILLATION OF REBELLIOUS SPIRITS
on that I am not deceiving you. If you had asked before I would have told you; it was just your
assumption. You presumed that I am also a celibate, you projected that idea.”
But he was so afraid of seeing a woman. And I said. ”Now that you have raised the question I would
like to say to you that your celibacy is not worth anything. You can’t even look at a woman? Are you
so afraid? Your umbrella is nothing but your cowardice. You are continually carrying it all around the
university, and everybody is laughing. People can’t see your face, you can’t see people’s faces.” He
would walk so fast that nobody could start walking with him or talking with him. And he had a really
good walking pace – fast... covered with his umbrella.
”How long is this umbrella going to protect your celibacy, you tell me. And have you heard of any
scripture that says an umbrella can help you to remain celibate? Have you seen any pictures of
Mahavira, Buddha, Krishna carrying an umbrella? You are the first celibate in the world who is
trying to be celibate by using an umbrella. And I know perfectly well that you must be looking; here
in class also you must be looking sometimes, just opening your eyes a little bit.”
He said, ”But how do you know, because you are fast asleep?”
I said,”How do you know that I am fast asleep? You must be looking. How long can you keep your
eyes closed? And then to teach....”
The family tries to make something of you. My family wanted me to become a scientist; they saw a
potential. I said, ”I do understand that as a scientist I will be paid more, I will be respected more. As
a philosopher perhaps I may remain unemployed. But the time has come that I should choose my
own path. If it leads into the desert at least I will be happy that I have followed my own path; there
will be no grudge against anybody. Following your path, even if I become the greatest scientist, I will
not be happy because I have been forced; it is a kind of slavery. And you have the power to force
me, but remember that I will not in any way allow anything to be imposed upon me.”
That time my father became angry. He said, ”Okay, you go to the arts department but I am not going
to give you any money.”
I said, ”That’s settled. Money is yours; I am not yours. If you don’t want to give me money, that I can
understand. And I can understand that if I go to the science department, you are ready to give me
money because then I am following your desire. You are ready to give money to me only if I remain
under your control.
”So that’s perfectly clear: you are using money to force me in a certain direction which I refuse. But,”
I said, ”you will suffer repentance just because you mentioned money. Do you think you can force
me by threatening that you are not going to give me any money?”
I left the house. For two years he was continually coming, saying, ”Forget that and forgive me. I am
really sorry that I mentioned the money. I can see your trouble, and I am the cause of it” – because
at night I used to work as an editor in a newspaper just to earn money so that in the day I could join
the university. But I said, ”Money from you, how can I accept?”
One day, when tears came to his eyes, I said, ”Okay, if you insist, just put the money on the table. I
will not take it from your hand. From the table I can take it because with the table I have no problem,
From Ignorance to Innocence 315 Osho