MarC BrighTon - African Ascent Project

The journal of the
UCT
Mountain
& Ski
Club
2009

Who else? Ramblin’ Gus Mo’s personal effects at the Alder Ring
From the officials
Contents
Editor’s note: Steven Cohen 4
Editor’s note: JP Roux 5
Chairman’s report: “The way things have been” – Angus James Morrison 6
Treasurer’s report: “Creative accounting” – Phillip Cranz 8
Climbs convenor’s report: JP Roux 9
Outreach report – Lizelle Niit 10
Huts – Marc Brighton 12
Climbing wall – Calvin (Fuzzy) Kemp 13

From the hikers
Drakensberg – Phillip Cranz 14
Drakensberg route guide – JP Roux and David Karpul 21
Elandspad hike – Richard Bryer 26
The Roof – Marc Brighton 27
Milner Flakte – Mikhaela Levitas 28
Uganda – Simone Haysom 32
From the climbers
USSA – Julia Chen 39
Tafelberg – Sebastian Wyngaard 42
Rocklands – Robbie Fraser 47
Botswana bouldering – Marijus Šmigelskis 50
And then…
Orienteering “Report” – Nick de Klerk 53
Chocolate bananas – Kush Singh 56
Taxi Association newsletter – Lizelle Niit 57
Cheese and wine – JP Roux 58
On spontaneity – Jem Gorven 59
Notes from the Waaihoek Time Capsule 60
Cover photo
Simone Haysom, Steven Cohen, Jeremy Gorven and Ida-Maria
Heggelund in Uganda. See page 32.
This page, and illustration on page 58
Artwork by Jaas Raath, scanned from an old MSC journal.
Design and layout: Graham van de Ruit

TO THOSE WHO DON’T KNOW ME, I WAS A NEWLy
active member in 2008. I have been in the hiking
club since first year. And for the first three years I was
like so many of the members, completely inactive.
One day, Mikhaela suggested I come on the Hoare
Hut fresher’s hike. And for some strange reason I
thought: “Why not give it a go?” So I did. I went up to
our Hoare Hut and have been up several times since.
Just one push to experience hiking with the club and I
was hooked.
The famous Hoare Hut was what triggered my
interest in hiking. Though the walk up there is a slog,
and I was quite unfit at the time, the pools along the
way and the hut at the top were so worth it. The view
and talking nonsense, playing drinking games and
cooking in such a setting is something everyone should
experience. The only downside is the walk back; then
you have civilization to look forward to, and that is
often not as greatly anticipated.
The following times I have been up to Hoare Hut
have been even more momentous. The Hoare Hut
birthday bash, when you get to the top and are greeted
by people dressed formally with sparkling wine
in hand. I will never forget Angus wearing a dress
and Ida Maria in high heels. The occasion of Witels
comes to mind, when I bravely took on carrying a fire
extinguisher up to the hut, all I can say is that I still do
not like fire extinguishers. Also, when we encountered
the first rock pools on the way, a few people just took
4 The University of Cape Town
Letter from the editor:
The Mountain & Ski experience
STeven Cohen
off their clothes and swam naked. This was new to me,
but now I don’t even notice when hikers do that. The
most recent time I went up we walked to Waaihoek
peak and watched the sunset, with sundowners.
The club is full of people who have certain interests
in common, some of them a little bit crazy as well.
you meet people from every stage of their university
careers and from all faculties. To be honest if you, ever
want to learn about life, the world, physics, religion,
engineering, commerce, or anthropology, just go on a
few hikes and talk to your fellow hikers.
The sense of adventure is still maintained in the
club and the drive that the members have to not only
explore their surroundings mountains, but also to
show it to others. The adventures that occur are often
unexpected and wild, but such fun.
The more you put into the club the more you
get out. I was lucky enough to go on the expedition
to Uganda in 2008. It was one of the most amazing
experiences. you will read about it shortly, but after
five days of climbing at high altitude through swamps,
and one day of ice climbing, the hot shower at the end
and a flushing toilet were the greatest things in life. To
this day I still don’t understand why out of the seven
people who went on the expedition, I was the only one
to fall into every single swamp and also to get malaria
twice. Despite the bad luck, it’s a must do for anyone
who enjoys hiking.

Letter from the editor:
a word for the future
jp roux
WHILE STEvE AND MySELF LABOURED AT THE
2009 journal (Steve running after prospective
advertisers, me putting photos and articles together),
many things that never seemed apparent in the past
became embarrassingly obvious. I’d like to dedicate
this article to future MSC committees (and especially
the journal editors) in the hope of making this annual
exercise more efficacious and satisfying, both to the
readers and the editors.
a) What goes in the journal
Our annual journal is the vehicle by which we
communicate the stories of our adventures amongst
ourselves, the climbing-hiking-skiing community at UCT.
It’s not just about the mountains we’ve climbed, but
about how it felt to climb those mountains, and about
forgetting the gas and the teabags in the car. It’s the
qualitative recollections that make it fun to pick up any
MSC journal and laugh about the antics of the members of
that year. This is much how it has been and that’s good,
but an important part is also the historical record we
leave for future generations. How many conservation trips
did we do and how many pines did we cut down? What
maintenance has been done on Hoare Hut and what needs
to be done in the following year? What was the member
count and how many active members did we have? What
is the state of our affairs with UCT administration and
the MCSA? These are the quantitative questions that
seem to become more important once you take a step
back to evaluate the evolution of our club over a period
of time. In this regard the committee reports play an
essential role in tracking the factual issues. Importantly
these articles should serve to give account of what you’ve
achieved during your tenure as well as advice for the next
person who fills your portfolio. The 2008 journal editor,
Megan Greenwood, started a good trend by partitioning
the journal with a section that deals specifically with
committee reports. I have continued this trend, although
I am disappointed in missing several reports. Obviously
certain portfolios lend themselves to more informative
reports than others. So, for example, the position of
secretary, although administratively essential does not
seem to merit an individual report. But most portfolios
should be expected to give account; not just Chairman
FroM The oFFiCialS
and Treasurer, but also Conservation, Zuurberg, Huts and
the respective Convenors. In the 2007 journal for instance
there was no treasurer’s report (although Phil did do a
sterling job at the AGM!). It’s worthwhile considering this
as an obligation within our standing rules.
b) how we put it together
Since my own involvement with the committee started
it has always been the case that the journal was started
over the summer holidays and completed around March
of the following year. This creates a whole bunch of
headaches and inefficiencies. 1) It’s hard to get people to
write articles. A lot happens in a year and memories and
willpower fades as we party it up over the summer only
to embark on a new year’s adventures in January. This
means the journal is not always representative of the
club’s activities. In the 2009 journal for instance we don’t
have an article on any of the Freshers’ hikes/climbs. 2)
It means that the person elected to the journal portfolio
only starts with his/her work when the term of the
committee of which they were a part ends. 3) By the time
the journal is printed at the end of March of the following
year, many of the people who feature in the articles and
contributed to the journal are long gone from upper
campus and never receive a copy. very sad if you ask me!
A proposal to avoid such issues go as follows: The
journal editor should delegate the writing of articles
at the end of each term and make sure he/she has the
journal articles and photos for that term by early in
the following term. The layout of the journal can then
happen over the course of the year. When the AGM
comes around in September, the only things that need
to be added are the committee reports. The journal can
then move off to print fairly speedily so that when that
year’s members leave by mid November, whether for
the summer or forever, they can do so with a copy of
the journal in the hand, perfect for a nostalgic reading
session on a summer’s evening.
Lastly I’d like to thank (Long) Graham van de Ruit
who, for a nominal fee, was willing to design this
journal for us. It looks great, and neither Steve nor I
can imagine being forced to teach ourselves Adobe
InDesign on the fly. Muchas Gracias!
Mountain & Ski Club 2009 5

THIS yEAR HAS BEEN AN INTERESTING ONE, AS THE
Chinese are reputed to say. It has been a year of
challenges and triumphs, and one of change.
Within a week of the election of this year’s
committee, the anticipation of academic pressure
forced a number of resignations, notably Crazy Dave
Wilkinson as Secretary and Kirsty du Plessis as Socials,
although she remained on the committee without
portfolio. We decided to merge some portfolios
and abolish others, but were still left without an
equipment officer or secretary. However, Craig de
villiers, the new ski convenor and a second generation
MSCer introduced us to Chris Campbell who we coopted
as equipment officer, and whose legal training
we came to appreciate later in the year in dealing with
the abuse of permits for the Wit Els and for Hoare Hut.
Mikhaela Levitas, who had been elected vice chair in
addition to carrying on with her extremely successful
hikes portfolio, introduced us to Richard Bryer who
we co-opted as Secretary and who turned out to be
fantastically proactive in securing sponsorship for the
club from Cape Storm later in the year. This early crisis
averted, we were able to approach O-week with a full
and enthusiastic committee.
This year we signed up about 600 membersenough
to maintain our place as the second largest
mountain club in Africa, after the Cape Town section
of the MCSA, but nearly 200 less than last year. As
usual we put in a lot of effort on the Plaza; with the
traditional climbing wall, braai and paddling pool,
and as usual a good deal of our sign-ups were due
to the charm and charisma (and often bullying and
cajoling) of Mikhaela and JP Roux, who had taken
on the role of climbs convenor. However, this drop
in sign-up numbers was only the first symptom in a
malaise that was to infect the club for the rest of the
year. Whether as a result of the contracted academic
calendar, or merely due to the cyclic nature of student
6 The University of Cape Town
Chairman’s report
The way things have been
anguS MorriSon
interest, we were to suffer from a marked student
apathy that affected both the committee and the
ordinary membership. There seemed to be a decline in
the spontaneity that had become a hallmark of MSCers,
with very few hikes being proposed or organised by
non-committee members. A notable exception to this
was Nicholas de Klerk who made a noble effort to
resuscitate Orienteering in the MSC. There were also
fewer regulars on hikes, with students apparently
choosing only one or two hikes to go on each semester.
Despite this, we still managed to develop a strong
core of enthusiastic members, many of whom were
postgraduates joining for the first time, or returning
after a few years of inactivity.
This apathy was particularly noticeable in
our service portfolios – Outreach, Education and
Development and Conservation. Thanks to the grit
and determination of Lizelle Niit and her dedicated
group of Outreachers we were able to maintain our
enormously successful Outreach Program, often
against tremendous odds, and the jealousy and
opposition of some quarters within the communities
from which our learners come. Education and
Development and Conservation were not as fortunate
and, in Conservation in particular, it has been a shame
that we have not been able to maintain the head of
steam developed last year by Marc Brighton and Long
Graham van de Ruit. This year we also lost the driving
force of the former MSC and current MCSA members
Pierre Hoffa and Roger Diamond who had done so
much to help us with the organisation of pinehacks
over the previous two years.
One area that did not suffer from any lack of
enthusiasm, however, was climbing. Despite working
on his Honours, JP was able to organise and personally
lead up to 2 climbing meets a weekend, as well as
longer trips to Montagu, Rocklands and elsewhere. He
instituted a series of “Easy Fridays” to give beginners

a chance to improve their skills and more experienced
climbers to get a few hours of climbing in before the
weekend, and organised, with the help of our newly
elected climbs convenor, Joe Mohle, beginner trad
meets. JP also managed the UCT team that dominated
the USSA climbing tournament.
This year we opened our new climbing wall at
the recently-completed UCT Fitness Centre on middle
campus. That we were able to do so is due in no small
part to the dedication of Calvin “Fuzzykid” Kemp, who
carried the impetus he had built up last year with Greg
Bowden and Julia Chen into his new role as climbing
wall convenor. He tirelessly worked with John Donald
of Sports Admin to complete the wall and then spent
his holiday costing, designing and even building the
seamless crash mats that now line our climbing wall.
He has done much this year to rally the bouldering
community, even hosting a monthly Bouldering League
event organised by Marijus Smigelskis and Julia Chen.
Fuzzy was also instrumental in securing sponsorship
form the MCSA, through the intercession of that MSC
stalwart Julia Wakeling, for the purchase of grips for
the climbing wall.
Our second crisis as a committee came in early
March when Mikhaela, with characteristic spontaneity,
decided to take a year off to travel. It was quite a blow
to lose our hikes convenor, especially one with as
much drive and passion as Mikhaela, and even more
of a blow when her appointed successor, the legendary
Norwegian adventure-knitter Ida Maria Heggelund,
returned to Norway in the middle of the year. We
were saved by Steve Cohen who assumed the mantle
in his quiet and efficient way. He not only took over
the task of planning each quarter’s meets (as well as
his position as Journal Editor), but also, with Marc,
personally led most of them. Mikhaela had also been
vice chair, and that position was filled by the already
overworked JP, who proved his mettle by being the
FroM The oFFiCialS
most selfless and hard-working vice a heart could
desire. If in the latter part of my term as chair I was
able to achieve anything it was due to the help and
support I received from JP.
This year was also Andy Lewis’ first year as the new
president of the MSC, taking over from his godfather,
Greg Moseley. He immediately justified his appointment
last year by spearheading a legal response to a member
of the public who had advertised the Wit Els as an
adventure holiday, and he again proved his worth
later this year in helping us strike a balanced position
with regard to an MCSA member who had been caught
breaking into Hoare Hut during the ski season. Most
importantly, however, Andy has proved himself both
dedicated and involved, often joining me for a coffee in
the Physics Department tearoom for an update and to
offer advice on how to handle tricky situations in the
committee and in the club. He and my predecessor and
friend, Jeremy Gorven, have been the silent strength
behind the running of the club this year.
I realised with some surprise that this year was
my fifth as a member of the Mountain and Ski Club,
and my third as a member of the committee. For four
of those years I have known Jem and Phil Cranz, the
three-years-in-a-row treasurer, and although many
of my generation of MSCers graduated and moved on
last year, it was always the same old MSC as long as
Phil and Jem were around. I will still be a part of the
MSC next year, as will Andy, Claire Corbett, Ant Hall,
Long Graham, Mikhaela, Marc and, of course, JP, but I
can’t help feeling as though it is the end of an era and
that it is a very different club that JP will be chairing
next year. I’d like to thank every member of the MSC
for contributing to the spirit that makes our club what
it is, and especially I’d like to thank my committee for
just being super.
-Angus James Morrison
Mountain & Ski Club 2009 7

100 000
80 000
60 000
40 000
20 000
Other
0
O-week
Climbing
Outreach
Hiking
2007
Huts
8 The University of Cape Town
Treasurer’s report
a Beginners guide to the art of
Bookkeeping for Mountaineers
philipp Cranz
Total income
Conservation
Zuurberg
Total expenses
Climbing
Wall Socials
& Bar
2008
Skiing
VAT
Equipment
2009
Journals
Breakdown
HIGHLy DOUBT THAT ANyONE WILL MAKE THE
I effort of reading this complicated (yet highly
transparent) report. However, compelled by section
53c of the non-existing MSC constitution and the
unambiguous instructions from our authoritative
Chairperson, I saw no way out but to compile
this summary on money laundering and creative
bookkeeping…
Throughout my three years as treasurer the club
was successful in increasing its income by 54% to
R97 500 in 2009 – well done to all those recruiters
of naïve first years, those milking the system for
subsidies and those making advertising companies
believe that Hikers and Climbers had money to spend!
Total expenditures, in contrast, increased by only
4% over the last year to R52 400. I might have to add
that we had a minor capital expenditure for climbing
mats that I decided not to include as a general expense.
The fact that this acquisition cost the club some
R44 000 would anyway affect the bottom line only
marginally…
A Breakdown on which portfolio spends the most
is visible on the left – and fairly self-explanatory.
Unfortunately, I found no way to limit our social
engagement in the form of value Added Tax (vAT).
With R40 500 in the Special Account, R36 000 in
the Witels Account and an impressive balance in a
Savings Account, I am leaving my post as Treasurer
in the hands of Rich and the new Committee.
Looking forward, the Club will continue to focus its
expenditures on long-lasting capital investments
(Equipment, Improvements) and important
“Teambuilding Exercises” (Socials, Hikes, Climbs).

Climbs report
Climb on, you crazy diamond
jp roux
IT ALL SEEMS A BIT HAZy NOW. WE WERE AT THE
AGM. I was planning to man the bar again for
another year, or maybe the equipment room. Crazy
Dave shouted out: “JP for climbs convenor!” or
something to that effect. I thought: “That’s the one
with ropes, right?” And as the vikings used to say: the
rest is history.
I don’t know how often a novice has been elected as
climbs convenor, but in retrospect it seems that being
a good climber is not necessary to make a success of
this portfolio. In fact, sometimes being a good climber
might have an adverse effect on succeeding as climbs
convenor. ‘Succeeding’ here requires some unpacking:
In my instance I felt it meant making an otherwise
intimidating sport as approachable as possible for
as many people as possible. Regular climbers settle
into respective crews and mostly have the means at
their disposal to go out and climb. It’s the new kid;
the one without the shoes or the crash pad, without a
climbing partner, who doesn’t know where the crags
are or how to tie a figure of eight that can really use
a good convenor. Once the climbing virus has sunk its
tentacles into your brain, you don’t need a convenor to
organize your trips for you, and being a convenor can
only get in the way of your own climbing.
Montagu Freshers, as we’ve come to expect, was
a hit, with at least 60 students partying at the lapa at
De Bos on Saturday night. Again UCT’s top climbers
dominated USSA (refer to Julia Chen’s article). And
the year did not pass us by without a few visits to
Rocklands (refer to Robbie Fraser’s piece). But if there
was one thing that really expressed the climate of
climbing in the MSC in 2009, it was the Easy Fridays:
So you’ve only climbed once or twice before, or never
at all, but you’re interested? you had a stressful week;
you have plans for the weekend, but a Friday afternoon
FroM The oFFiCialS
free? Leaving school at lunch, heading off to one of the
close and easy peninsula crags, having some laughs
and wrapping the week up with a view. From the start
the concept was a hit, and every other Friday saw a
group of 12 – 18 students try their hand at climbing,
often for the first time. With the much appreciated
help of many committed climbers the MSC taught more
people how to tie a double figure of eight than I care
to remember. I don’t know exactly how many Easy
Fridays we did in the end, nor how many people went
in total, suffice to say that if I had to put up another
toprope on ‘Chicks dig it lank (14)’ at Lower Silvermine
I’ll throw myself off the top instead.
Many of the peeps I now see at the new wall on a
regular basis were fence sitters when they came on
their first Easy Friday. Many now crank much harder
than I do, and some have branched out to trad in a big
way. Many more of course did not catch the climbing
virus. For them, their happy association with climbing
will always only extend to sunny Friday afternoon
outing once a month to Silvermine to have fun
toproping a 16… and that’s great!
My commitment to pitching the majority of the
MSC climbing meets to noobs was of course far from
a self-denying act of charity. I also started my term as
convenor without shoes, a rope, or draws (I still don’t
have my own rope or draws). From not having lead a
route to working a 5* at Bosch crag, from only knowing
the indoor bouldering wall to seeing the sun set over
Rocklands and doing some night time at Roadcrew.
From not knowing what a cam was to falling on one I
placed, this is what the club gives in return! We have a
wealth of experience in the form of Joe, the 2010 climbs
convenor. I’m especially excited about learning some
sick trad skills from him. I also hope he manages to
keep the Easy Fridays going.
Mountain & Ski Club 2009 9

10 The University of Cape Town
Outreach report-back: Meet 1, March 2009
Kirstenbosch and beyond
lizelle niiT
2009’S OUTREACH CONvENOR, LIZELLE, THINKS
deep thoughts on a Sunday afternoon after the
previous day’s Outreach meet, and decides to record
those thoughts instead of doing homework. Here they
are now, for the first time in print.
Dear friends, enemies and primordial ancestors,
yesterday we had our first Outreach meet. It was
inspiring, terrifying and awesome fun all at once… all
in all, it was simply mucking afazing (to use a phrase
suitable for younger readers), and I am looking forward
to doing it again next weekend.
Not everything went smoothly, of course. I thought
for a while that transport for the MSC members was
going to be non-existent, and I dutifully freaked out
about this to the point of putting myself at risk of
a myocardial infarction. (This last term is simply
to prove that they are, contrary to popular belief,
actually teaching us something at medical school.)
My desperate emails and SMSes didn’t get too much
of a response, since it seemed that every club member
worthy of that title was either in Montague or having a
21st birthday party.
In the end, transport was organised at 1:30 on
Saturday morning. And no, you have not suddenly lost
your ability to read: I said “1:30 on Saturday morning”.
That was cutting it slightly fine, I will admit, and I
would like to express my sincere gratitude to my friend
SJ for rescuing me from my own stubbornness. He says
that, as repayment, I am not allowed to disagree with
anything he says ever again, but I strongly disagree
with that proposition.
On Saturday morning, “transport for the MSC
members” turned out to be “transport for Lizelle”, and
SJ and I drove to Constantia Neck alone. When we got
there, Thobela from SAEP and the 26 Grade 10 learners
were waiting for me, having just played a kissing game
I was relieved to have missed. We came up with a few
rules just so that I could write this email and say we
did, found volunteers to carry the food, and divided up
into groups. Then we set off along the contour path,
most of us hoping that we wouldn’t lose the way (or
too many hikers, for that matter).
There was great protest when I mentioned the MSC
rule that we need to get lost at least twice on every
hike. I tried my best to keep that rule and almost, but
not quite, succeeded: the fact that the contour path
doesn’t really branch and that Kirstenbosch has a
map at practically every corner made that task quite
challenging. We did, however, miss the turnoff to
Kirstenbosch at first (despite the very obvious sign
saying “Gardens” pointing towards it), and later had

some trouble finding Kirstenbosch’s main entrance. I am
very proud of myself for managing at least that much.
Being the genius I am, I also managed to hide the
fact that my mountain knowledge amounts to very
little by choosing Kirstenbosch as the destination for
our first hike. We walked around and I could read
the signs out loud, receiving applause after reading
one paragraph in Xhosa. I learned as much as, or
perhaps more than, the programme’s participants, and
every now and again Thobela had to put up with me
enthusiastically telling him what interesting new fact I
had just come across.
The sculptures were equally impressive. Some of
us were fascinated by their symbolic meanings, while
others found them appealing in a slightly… how shall
I put it… different way. you’ll need to see the picture
of Glen kissing a particularly beautiful lady statue to
appreciate this statement fully.
We played games such as “human knots”, we played
Frisbee, a few of the girls and I sang Westlife songs,
we had some hilarious Xhosa lessons, and in general
we simply did our best to disrupt the usual tranquil
atmosphere in Kirstenbosch as much as possible.
We ate seven loaves of bread, 2.5 kg of peanuts and
raisins and 40 fizz pops, and after a few reminders to
the participants managed to leave every picnic spot
clean and free of wrappers. I saw it as a tribute to my
sandwich-making ability when they enthusiastically
FroM The oFFiCialS
complained that the food was not nearly enough, but
I have to confess that that might have been more of a
tribute to their appetites than to anything else.
We spoke about mountains, hiking, future trips,
school, university and a bunch of other random topics.
We also had some conversations hinting ever-soslightly
at that kind of depth and meaningfulness
that those of us who have been hiking for some time
have come to anticipate in mountain conversations.
At those times we spoke about things like crime and
poverty, but also about beautiful, far-away countries
and our dreams for the future. I felt privileged to
catch glimpses into their world and to let them catch
glimpses into mine.
This meet was one of those experiences that shape
your life in a profound way without being anything
spectacular in themselves. Many people would see
nothing special about walking 7.5km along the contour
path and then hanging around at Kirstenbosch for a
few hours, and I would generally agree with them. But
there is somehow something special about propelling
people from less-than-perfect circumstances into a
place where, for one blissful day, nothing matters
except the mountain, the fresh air and the laughter
around them. We saw a past Kirstenbosch curator’s
grave with the subscript, “For his monument, look
around you.” We did, and what we saw enthralled and
delighted us.
Mountain & Ski Club 2009 11

THE HUTS PORTFOLIO COvERS ALL THE HUTS ON
our property; however I will admit that I have
focused almost entirely on Hoare Hut, just below the
top of Waaihoek peak. There are 2 parts in what has
been done this year: maintenance and new projects.
Maintenance is the mundane business of ensuring
that there is always gas for the stove, glass in the
windows and tea in the urn. For this I have to thank all
the poor people who have been saddled with all sorts
of heavy items (notably my brother Robin and Warren),
and the miserable nameless individuals who left it for
me to carry up.
My new projects for Hoare hut have focused on
making it a bit more user friendly, with less clutter and
getting rid of or replacing items that are not used. First
up were some apparently random pieces of wood that
12 The University of Cape Town
Huts report
out with the old…
MarC BrighTon
now form new shelving above the kitchen. Second was
getting rid of the manky old blankets which appear to
have been a happy home for generations of rastuses
(rasti?). Now at the hut are 10 large polar fleece
blankets (some of which made it up just in time for the
snow season).
To be honest, the hut is a never-ending source of
work, as soon as one job is done, the next appears: both
pressure lamps are demanding money with menaces
and more of the wood surfaces are going to need revarnishing
eventually.
yet, it is still completely worth it, to know that
we are maintaining such an amazing place in such a
remote and beautiful area.
See you at the hut sometime in the coming year!

Climbing wall report
Safe landing
Calvin (Fuzzy) KeMp
2009 SAW THE INSTALLATION OF THE NEW CLIMBING
wall at the UCT gym complex on lower campus. This
facility, designed by avid UCT climbers, was graciously
paid for by UCT Sports admin as means to ensure that
UCT continued to produce good results in the years to
come at varsity champs, which indeed happened in
2009. The R120 000 training facility caters to a variety
of climbers, from the beginners to the guys focused
on training hard every week. The MSC invested about
R50 000 of its own money in 2009 to invest in a huge
mat covering that the vast majority of the floor, thus
Notes from the Waaihoek Time Capsule. See page 60 for more.
FroM The oFFiCialS
ensuring injuries are kept to a minimum. The wall also
played host to numerous rounds of the Western Province
Boulder League, which acts as the selection system for
the WP Bouldering team which took top honours at the
2009 Nationals. MCSA Cape Town generously donated
money to the MSC for the purchase of new climbing
holds, a much needed and appreciated donation.
All in all the new climbing wall facility definitely
boosted interest in climbing with its very visible location,
thus creating a great opportunity to introduce more and
more people to the awesome sport of climbing.
Mountain & Ski Club 2009 13

14 The University of Cape Town
8 great Berg-ies
phillip Cranz remembers an epic Drakensberg trip

FroM The hiKerS
it all started with me pulling the shortest straw. Thus, while everyone else
experienced the excessive luxury of Dave’s Land Rover, I got banned to join
old Patrick on a 17 hours bus ride. Exhausted, we arrived at Amphitheatre
Backpackers at 5am the next morning to find the others comfortably rolled up
in their sleeping bags.
After a quick, cold shower a worn out minibus took us up the washed out
road to Sentinel Car Park (half way up we had to point out to Pat that he was
about to lose his mattress off the side of the trailer; he kept trying to lose
his mattress throughout the remainder of the trip). The clouds pulled in as
we were about to take a happy group picture (in hindsight we should have
interpreted this as a warning sign!) but off we went, cheerfully shaking our
backpacks, taking pictures at every corner and throwing snow balls at naive
group members. The first challenge for Dave was the chain ladder leading
up to the escarpment. Dangling in the middle of nowhere he refused to
appreciate our well meant comments (and later persisted in exaggerating just
how high it was).
What a stunning view from the edge of the escarpment overlooking the
Amphitheatre! The drop-off close to a kilometre, the majestic peaks in the
distance, the miniature landscape way down below. We had lunch at the
world’s second highest waterfall, JP took a well documented dump on the
escarpment and finally all eight of us lined up at the edge to do what men have
to do at every cliff.
This is probably a good moment to introduce the team. Eight of us, all lined
up along the edge, all brave men prepared for nature’s challenges. Numerous
individuals had questioned the fact that we didn’t have any female followers.
Mountain & Ski Club 2009 15

The answers ranged from speculations (“the girls were too afraid”), to
frustration (“girls don’t like us”), to rational thinking (“they would only slow us
down”). But away from a hypothetical team and back to a real team:
Without a question, we’d have to start with Marc(us Aurelius Maximus
Thor). With his red woolen Santa Clause gloves, shorts, and a 19th century back
pack, he was the most hard core amongst all of us. The only one to dare meet
the sunrise at the edge of the Amphi armed only with a pair of boxers. And
don’t dare to challenge his status! At one stage he tried to attack Jem with a
frozen stalactite, just to realise that it had better use when melted, boiled and
flavoured with a tea bag.
Second in line, I’ll nominate Mr Karpul. With his holy white hat, his walking
stick and what he calls “a manly grin” he looked like a misplaced grandfather
wandering along the escarpment. In our eyes his character was complete when
we discovered his passionate, yet amusingly hopeless attempts at catching
16 The University of Cape Town

trout, and the fact that a half empty bag of sushi rice had almost prevented him
from climbing Mweni’s pass.
Having had a near death experience after the stalactite attack, Jem had
a sudden urge to run behind the next rock. His hands must still have been
shaking, as moments later we got to admire a strip of toilette paper dancing
and throwing loopings in the wind outside our cave.
JP, the proud owner of the third version of a green jersey had only one
weakness besides losing things. When Dave saw JP with a map in his hands
he smiled, encouraging JP to huff: “why is that ironic Dave… huh? As with
most situations depicted in Alanis Morrisette’s timeless and misnamed classic
‘Ironic’ it’s not so much irony as simple bad luck for whoever follows me as I
trudge of in the wrong direction. Which never happened. Ever.”
Craig, had a badly wounded foot. He was however wise enough not to look
for pity from the rest of us. Instead he trotted behind Dave with his tongue
out, biting on it to hide the pain. Overall, however, he was a daring man, one
of the few willing to brave the mountain for another week and always the one
standing the closest to the edge.
Then we had the random German exchange student, Steffen Pfannkuchen.
His surname translated means pan cake and you are welcome to draw whatever
conclusions you want from this. I felt special pity for Marc who had to share a
tent with Steffen’s lush curly locks. The most optimistic member of our company.
Don’t ask him for directions though; he’s not from around here you know.
The man of secrets was Patrick. We spent days puzzling over the Mweni-pass
“mattress incident.” Why had he dropped his mattress down a gorge and how
did he manage to get Marc to get it for him? On Facebook, Jem summarised:
“Some say that Patrick threatened him with a stick and some maintain he
experienced a momentary lapse in sanity. We will probably never know!”
As the humble and quiet observer I have not a lot to share about myself
with the reader. I had the newest backpack and the nicest camera; I read the
maps better than anyone, was the fittest and dared to stand the closest to the
edges. I cooked the best supper and threw five Basothos and three dogs to the
ground when we were attacked.
But now enough of describing the characters! The trip was an unbelievably
FroM The hiKerS
“We watched Basothos hunt baboons with their dogs, and tried skating on
a frozen lake ( especially JP turned out to have a real talent… ).”
Mountain & Ski Club 2009 17

eautiful and stunning experience. Never had I known that there was
such paradise right in the middle of South Africa. The beauty, but also the
mercilessness of nature was incredible. Combining the first and second trip, we
spent close to two weeks without seeing another human being. Carrying food,
warm clothes and tents on our backs we followed winding paths only trusting
JP’s map-reading abilities and Dave’s GPS. We found caves in the cliffs of the
escarpment, protecting us from the ice cold wind and offering a phenomenal
view over the landscape way below us.
It was in the middle of winter. As the sun slowly disappeared behind
the closest peak, we hastily pitched out tents. The moment the last ray had
disappeared temperatures dropped by ten degrees. Only seconds after sunset
you could draw pictures with your gloved fingers in the layer of ice on the
tents. It got especially bad when the ice-cold wind started, biting into your face
and bending the tent poles. Not surprisingly the exhausting day hikes, the high
altitude and the cold made us crawl into our sleeping bags as soon as possible.
Wearing all the clothes we had, even a three man tent was so cold that a litre
bottle of water placed between our sleeping bags was frozen solid the next
morning. Lying awake in the dark and cold, we took turns reading the only
book we brought.
The beauty of the Berg are the passes. Having spread the maps out on the
floor back in Cape Town it was easy to run the finger back and forth and plan a
route zig zagged up and down. But, oh my Basoth, those passes were steep and
long! We sang “Mweni pass’ ass’ grass, Mweni pass’ ass’ grass, Mweni pass’ ass’
grass” for what felt like eternity while placing one foot before the other. Later, in
the safety of Cape Town, JP made an ode to Mbundini pass: “One leg descending;
“Crawling on all fours, trying to keep the resistance of the backpack as
low as possible and grabbing on to every rock and grass bushel, we moved
forward, centimetre by centimetre.”
18 The University of Cape Town

FroM The hiKerS
One leg traversing; One ankle turning; One ankle twisting; Pathless, grinding,
aching gist.” But as the hike progressed our muscles toughened and our skin
hardened. By the time Craig, JP and I descended our last pass (the infamous
Ship’s Prow) down to Injisuthi, we were hardy mountain goats.
The most adventurous (to put it mildly) day was the second last of the first
trip. A snow storm had covered the escarpment with a white carpet overnight.
As the ice-cold wind turned into a storm it felt like our eyeballs got frozen.
Having left the shelter of our cave, we fought our way forward through the
first hundred meters leaning against the wind in a 45 degrees angle, pulling
the balaclavas over the faces. Facing each other at arms length but having to
shout at full volume over the gale, we decided to split the group. Craig needed
to give his foot a rest, this was not Dave’s idea of trout fishing in the berg, and
Patrick… well he is the man of secrets. So Dave, Craig and Pat took the shorter
route down Rockeries back to civilization, while the rest of us followed the
Orange River, somewhat protected by the river banks. Walking past a frozen
waterfall, I struggled to imaging that this was supposed to be the same river
that ran through the burning heat of the Namibian dessert. But sooner or later
we had to leave the protected river banks, and at the top of Mhlambonja Pass
things got crazy as the wind struck with hurricane force. It was only a couple
of hundred meters from the top of the pass to where the cave was indicated
on the map, but it took as more than half an hour to make the little descent
to where the path split. The wind got channelled into a roaring river of air
that ripped everything in its way. We later heard that hundreds of meters
below us the highway between Joburg and Durban had been closed as strong
winds had blown over two trucks. Only in the news had I seen people gripping
Mountain & Ski Club 2009 19

lampposts or railings during hurricanes. But now I experienced it myself. The
only complication was that there weren’t any lampposts to hold onto and
that we found ourselves on an extremely steep incline, perilously balancing
between the rocks on the one side and a fatal tumble on the other. Crawling on
all fours, trying to keep the resistance of the backpack as low as possible and
grabbing on to every rock and grass bushel, we moved forward, centimetre
by centimetre. Impossible to communicate through the howling of the storm,
swallowing dust, and cutting your hands. The only thought that went through
my head was: “Please, just let the cave be where it is indicated on the map!” We
took the turnoff for the Bell traverse, towards the cave and crawled over the
little saddle between the Twins and the escarpment. We turned the corner and
looked about with a mixture of hope and anxiety – there was no cave. No, this
can’t be! It must be here somewhere! We hurried a couple of meters forward to
see Twins cave open up big and inviting – sweet release! Well protected from
the wind, huge and dry, some stalactites hanging from the roof, a stunning
view. Just the howling sound of the wind around the corner, like a fighter jet
accelerating for lift-off, reminded us of what we had been through.
It is difficult to describe our feelings when we reached Cathedral Peak Hotel
the next day. Covered in dirt, sweaty and exhausted we dropped our backpacks
on the veranda of the four start hotel, pushed together two tables and had
what must have been the best beer of my life. After more than a week of eating
nothing but mash, Imama soya mince (chilli flavour!), provita and instant oats,
the large burger with chips was heaven on earth.
After a day’s break only JP, Craig and myself were brave enough to challenge
the Berg for another week. Dave tried his luck catching trout and girls (neither
was successful), while the rest of the group went back to civilisation. A second
week in the Berg with a smaller group was a lot different. We had gotten fitter
and used to the hardship, this allowed us to appreciate the stunning views
even more, cover greater distances per day and waist our energy climbing
surrounding peaks or just rock-sitting on the edge of the escarpment. We
watched Basothos hunt baboons with their dogs, and tried skating on a frozen
lake (especially JP turned out to have a real talent…). (Editorial: We made
a campsite close to Champange castle and named it after Craig’s domestic
worker, Flora, who had been with his family for many years and who had
passed away on our day up Grays pass. GPS for “Flora’s view” S29 04.917 E29
19.677. It requires a bit more leveling).
Craig, Dave and I decided to road trip back to the mother city. We got
spoiled at Jem’s place in Durban, smoked weed in Coffee Bay, visited the
Grahamstown festival, chased girls at the Oyster Festival in Kysna and lunched
at Craig’s place in Somerset West. Sitting here in Johannesburg, half a year
later, recollecting the events, reliving the adventures, and feeling the emotions
of fear and joy once more – I have to admit, this was the best trip ever!
20 The University of Cape Town

Drakensberg
route guide
jp roux anD DaviD Karpul
FroM The hiKerS
one of the top five highlights of my time at UCT, which includes
actually getting a degree, is without a doubt the trips I’ve made to
the Drakensberg. Hiking in the Berg however, as I realized on my first
trip, is not hiking the Otter Trail. There’s a greater sense of adventure, and a
greater sense of truly being in the wilderness that accompanies any foray up
the escarpment. Many of the most beautiful routes are on faint or non-existent
paths. Often you find yourself simply making your own way; stumbling down
Mbundini pass, clutching grass, thinking “Where is that path?” (Aside: there
is no path down Mbundini, but it definitely is a “way to go” so to speak).
This is no doubt part of what makes hiking in the Berg so damn great! There
might well be a whole bunch of good Drakensberg guidebooks out there for
all I know, but I’ve never looked at, much less put down good money for one.
My previous trips to the berg were, either directly or indirectly, structured
around the content of a rather obscure website. Obscure but for the fact that it
was created by an ex-MSC member, famous for his Drakensberg exploits. I’ve
never met Stijn Laenen, but his exploration of the berg is legendary. Geocities
has unfortunately closed down, and with it Stijn’s highly informative page
no longer floats around in cyberspace. He has assured me though that he will
repost the content on www.verticle-endevour.com.
What follows in this article are five suggested routes for hiking the
northern and central berg, from the Amphitheater to Injisuthi. They range from
four to seven days in duration. It includes important GPS coordinates as well as
basic route information. Dave (the most amazing trout fisher I have ever met)
and I have hiked all of these trails between the two of us. The GPS coordinates
are from Stijn’s webpage as well as Dave and my last trip (of which you can see
the photos elsewhere in this journal). Taking any of the suggested “Tours” will
guarantee you sights of some of the most spectacular and remote corners of
the escarpment. Where deemed necessary we’ve included some tips and info
regarding travel and permit logistics, but in this department the reader would
have to do their own research. Our hope is that this article will give many a
Berg virgin the confidence to venture off and see for themselves more than
they’ll find in any travel magazine or coffee table book.
Maps: hiking in the Berg requires a proper 1:50 000 hiking map. Ezemvelo
KZN Wildlife publishes a set of six maps that covers the entire Berg. The MSC
has the complete set in the equipment room and any member may rent them. Or
alternatively you can purchase your own copies at www.themaps.co.za. Tour 1 will
require Map No. 1, “Royal Natal”, in this series. Tour 2 and 3 will require Map No. 1
as well as Map No. 2, “Cathedral Peak”. Tour 4 and 5 will only require Map No. 2.
Mountain & Ski Club 2009 21

Tour 1:
amphitheater to
Mweni
Duration: four days
Day 1
The day’s hiking starts at the Sentinel car park. you
can either drive yourself up the trecherous gravel road
that leads to the car park or organize a ride with the
Amphitheater Backpackers bus that takes guided day
trips up the Amphitheater (we paid R100 pp for the
ride it was worth it!). Along the way there is a parks
fee to be paid. On this trip the fee came to about 70pp.
There is only a half day worth of hiking to be done,
but make sure you get started before noon as you
want to explore the Amphitheater from the top (and it
gets dark really early in the winter). From the Sentinel
car park head up via the well trodden “chain ladder”
route. This is probably the most used pass in the Berg
and likely the only place where you will come across
a dozen or so day trippers and a few concrete steps on
your way. Once you’re up the ladders, follow the path to
the edge of the Thukela falls. Spend the late afternoon
exploring the Amphitheater. There is more than enough
camping space where ever you can find level ground.
We recommend picking a spot a little further along
the Amphi (S28 45.549 E28 54.119) where a rough
bush camp has been built. Be careful for opportunistic
Basotho herders who might pinch your gear during the
night. Better to keep everything inside the tents.
22 The University of Cape Town
Day 2
Leave the Amphitheater behind you as you hike along
the Kubedu river into Lesotho. Where the second big
tributary joins the Kubedu from the left (S28 49.023 E28
54.110), turn left and follow this tributary all the way to
its source at the edge of the escarpment. you will find
yourself at the northern edge of the Stimela Ridge. The
view from the escarpment here is truly spectacular.
Camp where ever you find level, dry(ish) ground.
Day 3
Hike up the last valley immediately behind and parallel
to the Stimela Ridge to the saddle behind Stimela
Peak. A short detour will find you on top of this peak
with an amazing view of the Mweni cutback. Go down
Mbundini Pass (Top: S28 50.750 E28 56.850) to where
the Mubudini river meats the Mweni river. Aside: The
map shows Mbundini pass as a “way to go” which
basically means there’s no path for much of the way;
be careful for sprain ankles on the way down! Try to
stay high up on the slopes and far above the river. Turn
right up the Mweni river and camp at the campsite a
little further up (S28 52.060 E28 59.768). Alternatively
head down the Mweni staying on the west bank (not
a warzone) for about 2 km and set up camp on the flat
field just after the cascading sandstone rock pools ideal
for swimming and said to be one of the seven natural
wonders of the Drakensberg
Day 4
Hike along the contour path that follows the Mweni
river out to Mweni visitors centre (S28 49.150 E29
06.090). Where the management can organise some
local public transport back to where ever you left your
car. Don’t give sweets to the locals, it’s bad for them.

alternative route, days 2 and 3
Day 2
This option sees more hiking and thus less time for
Rock-sitting on your second day so be sure to leave the
Amphitheater early. The map indicates a faint path that
follows the Kubedu river further along, and instead of
turning off at the suggested point above, heads up the
next valley and ends at the top of Fang’s pass. Camp on
the escarpment.
Day 3
Instead of taking Mbundini pass down, take Fang’s
pass. Camp at the spot suggested above.
important gpS coordinates
Sentinel Car Park S28 43.371 E28 53.204
Chain Ladders S28 44.816 E28 52.810
Possible camping Amphitheater 1st
night S28 45.549 E28 54.119
Turnoff point from Kubedu river to Stimela
Ridge S28 49.023 E28 54.110
Possible camping Stimela ridge 2nd
night S28 49.754 E28 56.837
Top of Mbundini pass S28 50.750 E28 56.850
Top of Fang’s pass S28 51.686 E28 56.411
Camping spot Mweni river 3rd night S28 52.060 E28 59.768
FroM The hiKerS
Tour 2: Mweni to
Cathedral peak
Duration: four days
Day 1
Hike from the Mweni visitors info center up
the Mweni river to the suggested camping spot
(S28 52.060 E28 59.768).
Day 2
Hike up Mweni pass. At the top stay on the path that
leads to the top of Rockeries pass. Cross the source
of the Orange river. About half way along the path,
turn left up the hill to the edge of the escarpment.
There should be cairns at the top pointing the way
to Mponjwane cave (S28 53.450 E29 01.792). The
cave is slightly tucked away from your approach but
is well sheltered against some pretty fierce gales.
Alternatively stay in Ledger’s cave, suggested by Stijn
for its spectacular views. (S28 52.982 E29 00.893).
Day 3
Hike along the Orange river. Where the Kokoatsoan
joins the Orange from the left, turn left and follow the
former. Stay on the main tributary of the Kokoatsoan
when it turns to the right and follow this valley up to
the edge of the escarpment. Hike down on the ridge
that is the border between Lesotho and SA to the top of
Ntonjelana pass. From their there a faint path heads up
above the Kwakwatsi river to the top of Mhlambonja
pass. Start going down this pass for a short bit until
the path splits. Go left over a tiny saddle on the Bell
Traverse path. Twins Cave is almost immediately to
your right. (S28 57.075 E29 06.784).
Day 4
you have two alternative routes down to the Cathedral
Peak Hotel: Either the Bell Traverse or Mhlambonja
pass. The Bell Traverse is not to be tried in bad
weather and may not be the route for people with
fear of heights, but is otherwise more scenic than its
alternative. Enjoy a well deserved burger and beer at
the Cathedral Peak Hotel restaurant.
Mountain & Ski Club 2009 23

Tour 3:
amphitheater to
Cathedral peak
Duration: seven days
A combination of Tours 1 and 2. Instead of hiking out
to Mweni visitors centre on the fourth day of Tour 1,
continue with Day 2 of Tour 2 up Mweni pass. I can’t
think of any better way to spend seven days in the
whole of South Africa. For photos of our trip along this
route last year, refer to the photo page in this journal.
24 The University of Cape Town
Tour 4: Circular
hike, Cathedral
peak area
Duration: five days
Day 1
Hike from Cathedral Peak Hotel to Xeni pass. About
150 meters after leaving the contour path to head up
the Xeni cutback there is a tiny camp site for the night
(S28 58.202 E29 08.581).
Day 2
Follow the river up the “way to go” which is Xeni pass.
About 1.5 km from where you left the contour path
you will pass the Plume on your left. Another river
joins from the left directly after this. Turn left here
up Cockade pass to the top. The going is steep, but
rewarding. Camp anywhere at the top.
Day 3
From the top of Cockade pass, stay on the Lesotho-SA
border all along the edge of the escarpment and finally
down to Windy Gap. This day does not involve hiking
to far (as a reward for conquering Cockade pass. Sleep

in Roland’s Cave (S29 00.505 E29 11.165). The cave is
slightly hard to find and perilous to approach, but well
worth the effort: one of the finest views for any cave
in the Berg. Facing Windy gap from the top, there is
a faint path that goes up the right to a narrow ledge.
Mind your step, don’t look down, and around the
corner is your reward.
Day 4
This is a fairly long day of hiking, so make sure you
hit the path early. Hike down the Organ Pipes pass, on
the ridge past the Organ Pipes and the old fire lookout.
Where the path forks at the end of the ridge, turn right
down Phillip’s Folly to the Thuthumi river. Cross the
Thuthumi and Didima rivers and follow the contour path
for another 5km. Take the turnoff to the left after about
5.5km and hike a further +/- 0.5km to Poacher’s cave.
Day 5
Follow the contour path. Cross the eMhlwazini river,
stay on the well trodden path pass the field rangers
outpost all the way to the tar road. Hopefully you can
hitch a ride back to the hikers’ parking.
important gpS coordinates
Camp bottom of Xeni pass 1st night S28 58.202 E29 08.581
Top of Organ Pipes pass S29 00.383 E29 10.561
Roland’s cave S29 00.505 E29 11.165
Tour 5: Monk’s
Cowl to injisuthi
Duration: five days
FroM The hiKerS
Day 1
Take the well trodden path from the Monk’s Cowl
wildlife office pass the Crystal falls up towards
verkykerskop. At the top follow the path as it heads
straight towards the scenic Caithkin peak. At the
T-junction turn right on the contour path and stay on it
all the way around Caithkin peak. Shortly after joining
the eMhlwazini river you will find Keith’s camp (S29
04.043 E29 20.335).
Day 2
Head up Grays pass from Keith’s camp. Spend the
afternoon exploring the escarpment from the top
including the views form Champagne Castle. Camp in
Nkosazana cave or anywhere on the escarpment (our
suggestion: Flora’s Camp, S29 04.917 E29 19.677).
Day 3
Hike down Ship’s Prow pass. Be sure to take the
south fork of the pass as the north fork is rocky and
dangerous. Stay along Ship’s Prow stream. Be prepared
to bash through bushes from time to time. The camp
site is just above where the pass meets up with the
contour path (S29 06.408 E29 21.930).
Day 4
Follow the contour path as it snakes back to Injisuthi
Wildlife office.
important gpS coordinates
Keith’s camp S29 04.043 E29 20.335
Top of Grays pass S29 04.297 E29 19.385
Camp site 2nd night (Flora’s Camp) S29 04.917 E29 19.677
Nkosazana Cave S29 04.314 E29 19.120
Top of Ship’s Prow pass S29 05.978 E29 19.523
Camp 3rd night bottom of Ship’s
Prow S29 06.408 E29 21.930
Mountain & Ski Club 2009 25

elandspad escape
riCharD Bryer
The time has come my little friends, to talk of other things; of boots, of pics
of fynbos kloofs, of waterfalls and kings. No, not the hills of the infamous
Sports Centre parking lot, or the “waterfalls” outside the maths building.
Nay, this trip was about city kids escaping – escaping the electronics, the drugs
and the parking guard at Rhodes Mem who makes you pay R5.
Nestled, like a Nestlé bunny in a tub full of jelly babies, in a valley just after
the Hugenot tunnel, this hike is a real peacher. The hike starts underneath the
highway and slowly as you make your way up into the mountains, the buzz of
the tunnel ventilation (and any semblance of the city life you had before) fades
into the sweet chirping of the yellow-breasted doveling (okay I made that up, but
there were birds okay!) The route lead us upstream for about an hour, and then
up onto the mountainside for another hour. We descended into the river valley,
and marched on for about a kilometer. It was beautiful – a 100 foot waterfall
greeted us with its giant, watery arms – and this would be our destination.
After much screaming in delight, naked frolicking and sandwich dominating,
we turned around and headed home, refreshed and ready to tackle the daily
nuisances and nightly depravity which drove us out there in the first place.
A chilled day hike which packs a serious splendor-punch.
26 The University of Cape Town
More details:
Elandspad is an easy hike close to the Du Toits Kloof
tunnel. The path follows the valley above the river, and
after an hour or two you rejoin the river at a very welcome
pool at Fisherman’s Cave. The river just above the cave is
quite easy to explore, with a bit of wading, and some nice
landmarks like the “Gog and Magog” rocks overlooking
the river. You’ll probably see some disas on the cliffs in
summer. A steep tributary to the right goes off into a very
spectacular narrow gorge ending in a very high waterfall
which few people ever visit. In the main kloof, there
are some wonderful pools, waterslides and one or two
optional jumps. Remember that you can’t go too far past
Fishermans Cave, as you will reach private property, and
your permit doesn’t allow you to go this far. On your way
down, you can follow the river all the way back to the road.
The lower reaches are quite mellow and calm, and make for
pleasant wading, although this annoys the trout-fishermen
who share the lower parts of the river with you. Since the
bottom part of the kloof is quite accessible from the road,
there are often crowds of day-trippers in this area, who
(unlike you) didn’t pay for a permit to be in this area.
Courtesy of (okay I lie, I just stole it):
http://cw.scouting.org.za/greathikes/dayhikes.html

FroM The hiKerS
local is lekker: The roof
MarC BrighTon
The roof tried to happen in the first semester,
however it was called off after a good look at
the weather forecast. Thank goodness, as the
planned date turned out to have some of the worst
storms of that month!
Eventually, well into the second semester, 2 dates
were chosen: the main date and a backup in case of need.
A large group of people signed up for Sunday the 16th
of August, and the majority of them arrived at 5h20am,
none of them having experienced the roof before.
25 people started hiking at 5h30 from the UCT Info
Centre, and made rapid progress up to the blockhouse,
‘persuading’ 3 members of the group that excessive
exercise was not their chosen task for the day. A quick
breakfast was had at the top of minor peak before we
summited devils peak.
Another group member left us to go home via
Newlands ravine. The rest of the group slowly
navigated the challenges of ledges, with 21 people
meaning that the 2 scrambles on the route took over
an hour. We reached Maclears beacon about 11am, and
then had to hustle to cross the top of Table Mountain
in order to reach Constantia Nek in time to meet
Graham Poulter (completing the 2nd half of the roof
after a gap of several years).
Kalk Bay
A baking hot ascent of vlakkenberg was followed
by lunch at the top. By now the strain was starting to
show on some of the group members, but everyone (now
down to 18 people) made it up the top of Constantiaberg,
the last major peak of the day. A quick trot down to
Silvermine was followed by a dip in the dam there.
The problem with the roof hike is always the 7pm
deadline at Kalk bay, when the last train (our means to
get home) leaves. We were now rushing though east
Silvermine trying to make sure that we didn’t get left
behind (like some people last year).
Tired and footsore, we arrived in Kalk bay, and had
just enough time for a quick beer at the Brass Bell. This
was interrupted by a screech that sounded exactly like
a train pulling up at the station, so we sprinted to the
platform to find that it must have been feed-back howl
on the bar’s speakers!
I carried a GPS the whole way, and though it
lost signal for part of the ledges route, it would be
safe to say that the Roof is just under 40km with
approximately 2200 metres of ascent and descent.
This is the epic hike, taking 12-14 hours and
covering in 1 day more than you thought was possible.
Definitely one of the highlights of the MSC calendar; I
look forward to next year’s roof!
UCT
Mountain & Ski Club 2009 27

exploring with
The Captain
28 The University of Cape Town
MiKhaela leviTaS goes skinny dipping, scrambling
and caving on the Milner vlakte
Mid October, Mighty Captain Morgan (Morgan Behr of MCSA) leads
some new and some old into the Hex mountains to summit the
infamous Milner Peak, traverse the vlakte , and bundu bash through
some of the Cape’s thorniest and hardest fynbos.
Day 1: Swim and relax. We left on Friday and hiked up to the Freshers’ dam.
After some epic skinny dipping and a delicious dinner we went to sleep only to
be kept awake by the brightest full moon. At 5am we were awoken by Captain
Morgan. Three hours later we started hiking.
Day 2: Up to the Milner vlakte. We enjoyed lunch at a beautiful spot next to
some great pools about 300m from our campsite for the night. Wedged between
beautiful rock formations we set up camp under the peak. With about 6 hours
till sunset we decided to go exploring and went looking for a cave Morgan had
promised, Chris and company getting very sidetracked, climbed any protrusion.
Eventually we found our cave, wet and dark, and the way out was by tunnelling
up and out through a 3m hole. Jut next door to this cave is another cave that
opens up to two massive arches. We had such fun exploring the vlakte and were
very lucky to have an old-timer to show us the hidden gems.
Day 3: Summit. Don’t be fooled by how easy it looks; it really ain’t. It’s a slog
up to the peak with many a false horizon. The way up is traversed with these
crazy overhangs into the Milner Amphitheatre; quite a thrill lying on the edge.
We climbed to the peak and then some of us scrambled up the needle. After
a long day, bleeding legs and tired eyes, we treated ourselves to Col Cacchios
pizzas. Great weekend, definitely to be repeated!

aDverTorial
african ascent project
have you climbed Mount Kilimanjaro? Do you plan on climbing it in the future?
If you have you will have experienced the same inner conflict that we did when
we climbed: wanting to enjoy the beauty and sheer exhilaration of the climb but
constantly being confronted with the substandard working conditions of our trusted
guides and porters, without whose help the expedition would have been impossible.
When climbing Mount Kilimanjaro most people book through a European or
American company which has partners in Tanzania. The company hires a guide for
each expedition, and each guide is responsible for organizing enough porters. The
company has no contract with the porters and takes no responsibility for their safety
and wellbeing.
Kilimanjaro National Park sets out a minimum wage for porters and guides, and on
average companies pay them half this amount. Porters carry up to 30 kg of luggage on
every given expedition, while the National Park suggests a maximum of 20 kg. They
generally eat only one meal a day, which is almost pure starch. Moreover, porters sleep
in overcrowded tents and are not given the correct gear to summit the mountain.
The porters make most of their money from tips. However, if tips are given directly
to the guides this money seldom finds its way to the deserving porters.
If you have experienced this and wished that there were something you could do
then you are in the right place. The African Ascent Project is a non-profit organisation
with the aim of partnering with local guiding companies and the private sector in
making quality climbing equipment accessible to porters and guides working on
mountains in Africa. By doing this we aim to not only improve mountain safety but
also empower the porters and guides.
To further break the poverty cycle and improve mountain safety, we partner
with other projects, foundations, and the local community in running education and
support programs that uplift porters’ and guides’ lives.
you can now make a difference by donating to our cause and helping us empower
guides and porters through education, access to clothing and improved mountain safety.
Currently, guides and porters are able to ‘rent’ clothing from one facility in Moshi,
however due to the large distances between villages, the facility is inaccessible for most
guides and porters. We are raising funds to support four clothing centres at the gates of
the Kilimanjaro National Park and are accepting clothing donations to fill the centres.
To get involved, to donate and for more information please go visit our website at
www.africanascentproject.com, or email us at info@africanascentproject.com.
FroM The hiKerS
Mountain & Ski Club 2009 29

hall of fame
jp roux
uCT climbers excelled at the 2009 UCT sports
awards, bagging a few prestigious awards
including the Landstem trophy for performance
of the year.
Half Colours were awarded to Duncan Fraser and
Anthony Hall for bouldering and sports climbing
respectively. Double Full Colours went to Julia Chen
and Marijus Šmigelski for bouldering and sports
climbing, whilst Anthony Wood received the same for
bouldering and Joe Mohle for traditional climbing.
Marijus was also nominated for sportsman of the
year. Some of his achievements included winning
the national boulder league, first place at USSA for
bouldering, and being ranked 1st in South Africa and
in the top 100 in the world.
30 The University of Cape Town
The big trophy for the evening, the Landstem
trophy for performance of the year, went to Julia Chen
however for sending Shrek 2, and thus setting the
record for the hardest grade ever bouldered by a South
African woman.
Three committee stalwarts were rewarded for
their efforts over the years in running an efficient and
professional club. Phil Cranz; a dedicated treasurer for
three years running, Jeremy Gorven; for the various
capacities he’s served in, including 2008 Chairman,
Angus Morrison; for literally being part of the
furniture (oh, and 2009 Chairman). Their efforts have
proved instrumental in keeping a large and active club
on the straight and narrow.

gallery
Mountain & Ski Club 2009 i

ii The University of Cape Town

Previous page
Phil Cranz in the Drakensberg
Above
Mnweni sunrise, the Drakensberg
Above right, right, and left
Tafelberg trad expedition
gallery
Mountain & Ski Club 2009 iii

Top
Mlambonja, the Drakensberg
iv The University of Cape Town
Above
Amphitheatre sunrise, the Drakensberg

gallery
Mountain & Ski Club 2009 v

Above
Andrew Wood working ‘Who the Fuck is Minki?’, 7C, Rocklands
Opposite, top
Greg Bowden on ‘Poison Dwarf ’, 7B, Rocklands
Opposite, bottom
Julia Chen tackling ‘Orange Heart’, 6C, Rocklands
vi The University of Cape Town
Next page, top
Sunshine in the Ruwenzori, Uganda
Next page, bottom
(Left to right) Craig de Villiers, Phillip Cranz, Simone Haysom, Steven
Cohen, Jeremy Gorven and Ida-Maria Heggelund in Uganda
(Designer’s note: It broke my heart to have to crop this photo for the cover,
so here it is unspoilt.)

gallery
Mountain & Ski Club 2009 vii

viii The University of Cape Town

32 The University of Cape Town
uganda in
gumboots
SiMone haySoM remembers the
mud, the snow, the highs and the
lows of eight days in the Ruwezori

When JP first asked me to write a piece about our Uganda expedition
I felt nervous at the prospect of translating such an impressive
experience into words, and excited to be able to relive those eight
wild days again. But writing about the luscious Ruwenzoris beneath the grey cap
of English sky in a flat shire eighteen months after the fact has proved to be as
challenging a feat as summiting Margherita. Unable to do it justice as a linear
narrative I’ve had to just put together a few of my best memories and hope that
paints an adequate picture.
To set the scene, the Ruwenzori are a three million year old range on the border
of the DRC and Uganda. The range is 120 km long, snow capped and consists of
six massifs separated by deep gorges: Mount Stanley, Mount Speke, Mount Emin,
Mount Gessi, Mount Baker, and Mount Luigi di Savoia. The formation of the range
allows you to walk a circular route through the Ruwenzori Mountain National
Park in Uganda, staying in huts and on paths of varying quality. Porters from
the villages nearby accompany you, as do three guides from the inestimable
Ruwenzori Mountaineering Service (RMS).The highest point is Margherita Peak
on Mount Stanley which racks in at a stately 5 109 m.
Getting going: ‘Us’ consisted of Phil, Jem, Ida, Mix, Steve, Craig and myself.
Getting to the base of the mountains had already entailed some adventures of
the not so wild kind: the team’s research from SA, Jem’s tough bargaining of
a good deal from the RMS, Jem’s expired passport (not a problem for Uganda
immigration apparently), Mix and Ida’s lost baggage, and travelling in two
groups from Kampala to the the far East of Uganda.
We got to the RMS offices early and met our guides. The wise Elias, the silent
Jonson, and the more silent Johnson were all from the area and had hiked the
FroM The hiKerS
Mountain & Ski Club 2009 33

Ruwenzori more times than we’d had hot meals. Once we’d all tried and tested
the equipment we were hiring (crampons, axes, harnesses) and weighed up what
to leave behind we set off down a dirt track to the National Park. On either side of
the track were huts and families, kids carrying kid-sized bunches of bananas, and
patches of coffee beans drying outside in the sun. They called out news and good
wishes to the guides and us.
The first dinner: Was red Thai curry cooked on the stoep of a wooden hut
that overlooked the deep forested valley we’d walked up that first day, a not
too-taxing start. At one point Jem came storming out of the night to call us all
out, stumbling over the tree roots in the dark to see ‘why they call these the
mountains of the moon!’. Between the canopy there was fat and juicy globe,
just about the brightest moon I’ve yet seen.
A to B: The one thing everyone seems to know about the Ruwenzoris is Mud.
Gumboots are a necessary piece of kit and you hardly wear anything else. They
say you walk through five vegetative belts: grassland, montane forest, bamboo,
Heather and the afro-alpine moorland zone. But in truth there is a sixth: the
mud bog. And what do you do if you are Phil, Jem and Craig when confronted
with a mud bog? Try to push each other in, obviously.
Chameleons: Grey ones, green ones, blueish ones, tiny ones, medium ones.
Jonson had an eye for spotting them. Rumour is there are still forest elephants
on the mountains but with all the crashing about, screaming as we nearly fell/
got pushed into mud bog etc the only things slow enough to still be left around
were the colour-changing lizards.
Extreme balcony: Ida and Mix did some extreme things off the balcony of
one of the huts which I won’t go into the details of, for which they were both
34 The University of Cape Town

awarded ‘Man cards’. Mix also got one for lifting Steve about a metre off the
ground with one arm. The female porter got one for making it look easy.
Extreme Ida, extreme Phil and Craig: Two days before the summit we took an
acclimatisation day at a hut near a looking glass lake. Phil and Craig decided
they were acclimatised enough, thank you very much, and popped up Mount
Speke (4 890 m). The rest of us explored the heather, played chess and watched
Ida dance it up with one of the porters to the Swahili tunes on a portable radio
who spontaneously grabbed her boobs and hightailed it back to his hut to the
general hilarity of all, including the madam herself.
Crazy vegetation: Think emerald green, viridian and chrome green in the
form of mosses, huge ferns, old trees, and new shoots. This turned into a brief
patch of minimalist bamboo forest and then gave way to fantastic plants once
again. The mountains are famous for gigantic lobelias and fields of bio-diverse
heathers. I’d have to say the eeriest were the rust coloured ‘clumpy-mosstumour-things’
that added big bulges to tree branches, in misty valleys.
Lady Margharita: By the time we were approaching the last hut before the
summit, it was slow going. The hut is just below the glacier so you are already
almost 5 000 meters at that point, and it is cold. (The porters, though, were still
gamboling up in threadbare clothes with their huge loads supported by a strap
round their foreheads). Our chalet for the night was a tiny triangular thing on a
rocky outcrop. Despite the freezing temperatures with seven of us in it we were
more than cosy enough. We woke up in the dark and put on and packed our
snow gear and a small lunch. With our crampons clanking and our headlamps
on we tramped over the rocks like miners in shackles but travelling up and up
towards the white slopes above. We moved slowly at all stages – clambering
FroM The hiKerS
Mountain & Ski Club 2009 35

over wet rocks, up and down ladders once on the snow and through the soft
deep drifts themselves.
With the peak in sight – but still feeling a mile away – our saddest moment
came. Mix, whose toughness on mountains is matched only by her love for them,
was forced to go down by altitude sickness. She was wise enough to know it,
and to mention it. I can only compare this moment to the scene in the first Lord
of Rings where the mighty Gandalf gets pulled into the depths by the Belroth,
and says ‘Fly you fools!’ and all the hobbits go to pieces and Aragorn looks stoic
and the elf looks inscrutable yet still pained and… Well, it was truly sad.
The stretch that lay ahead though was as mean as it was beautiful. A
blizzard started and the snow was soft. Each step could find you knee or
even thigh-deep. We roped together and practised digging in our axes in case
anyone slid. We passed huge icicles and haunting formations in the ice. We
passed them very, very slowly.
After the snow slope there was some precarious manoeuvring in snow
boots over sharp rocks and soon enough a small, weather-beaten sign came
into view: Margherita Peak, 5 109 m. We cracked open the cheese and crackers,
howled like hyenas and drank in a view all the way into the DRC.
If getting from the hut to the peak was a challenge, it seemed brief and
simple compared to the trip back. I was roped in with Phil and Steve. Ida, Jem
and Craig went on ahead and arrived back at the hut to find Mix feeling a bit
better. They decided it would be best to head to lower ground and added a few
extra hours to summit day to get the next hut.
Phil, Steve and I took a little longer. I don’t know which of them was a bigger
hero – Steve for pushing on through intense exhaustion, or Phil for cracking
36 The University of Cape Town

jokes until the end. By the time we got back to the hut it was dark and more
walking was no option. We relaxed on huge piles of mattresses, ate chocolate
doused in disinfectant (not as good as it sounds) and played card games.
Log Jumping Champions: We rejoined the others the next morning and
decided to power through the last two days in one. By this time we were
mud pros and much of the the remaining bog stretches we spent discussing
the lucrative bog-themed computer game that we could design based on our
experiences, and testing out the moves of course. 100 points for a long jump!
200 points for spotting a chameleon!
Back to humankind: Well, I won’t pretend that after a week of sweat and mud
and temperatures that strongly discouraged stream bathing we weren’t feeling
a powerful desire for a shower. But even then I could tell that saying goodbye
to those mountains would be hard.
We repaired to: lakes and islands in the south of the country for post-hike
R&R, gave Rwanda a look in and spent our last few nights together around a
wood fire with warthogs and hippos wondering around. Uganda was full of
laughs, lessons and friendly people. But the Ruwenzoris have that quality that
only unspoilt mountains can, of being part of another world of moss and ferns,
icy streams and calm lakes, winds and heights, companions and adventurers.
Rereading this I have to conclude it’s a rubbish description of eight days of
hard hiking. you’ll have to go there yourselves. Don’t forget to check when your
passport expires and wear in your wellies.
I’d like to end with some poetry. I had this memorised as a young’un and
the Ruwenzoris inspired me to dig up from the depths of the internet. Next
time I’m in a bog, I know what to shout at the forest elephants:
FroM The hiKerS
Mountain & Ski Club 2009 37

The Muddy Puddle by Dennis Lee
I am sitting in the middle
Of a rather Muddy Puddle,
With my bottom full of bubbles
And my rubbers full of mud,
While my jacket and my sweater
Go on slowly getting wetter
As I very slowly settle
To the Bottom of the Mud.
38 The University of Cape Town
And I find that what a person
With a puddle round his middle
Thinks of mostly in the muddle
Is the Muddiness of Mud.

Climbing
in the
uSSa
julia Chen
FroM The CliMBerS
pretoria – Home of Jacarandas and the Blue Bulls. This was the setting for
the annual USSA climbing competition. Out in Mooiplaats at The Barn,
a few of us had arrived the night before and needless to say it was cold.
Not just cold as in “I’ll just put on a jacket” cold. It was “I’ve put all my clothes
on that I brought with me and I’m still cold” cold. It’s the kind of cold that you
feel right down to your bones and makes your tents freeze over. It was nice
to see the same faces from previous years and to meet new faces from other
universities. The air was filled with excitement and we knew it was going to be
a good three days.
The next morning – in true up country style – we were up, registered
and ready to climb by 7.30am! We started with the lead qualifiers, two routes
each for the men and ladies. Most of the UCT men qualified for the semis and I
qualified for the ladies. After lunch, we began the bouldering qualifiers. Twelve
problems for the men and ladies, a lot of them were shared with ladies having
any feet instead of tracking. A few hours later and many sweaty people, it was
time to chill and do what we came here to do. Socialise! The welcoming braai
was a great way to get to know everyone and the house-sized bonfire proved to
be a winner. But soon enough, everyone turned to their tents and sleeping bags
for warmth and there ended the first day.
Day two was lead day – semi-finals and finals. These up countrymen and
their early mornings! Two routes again to go to the next round, I flashed both
and four of our men qualified for the finals. Afternoon had arrived and the
competitive air had finally set in. The ladies went first; we each had one onsight
attempt whilst the others waited in isolation. The route started on a flat wall
and moved into the almost horizontal roof and then round the lip to finish at
Mountain & Ski Club 2009 39

40 The University of Cape Town
the chains. I went last and managed to get the highest point past the roof and
fell a few moves from the chain. The men’s finals were much more exciting
with Marijus and Heinrich battling it out on the Superfinal. In the end, Heinrich
mustered the strength to just get past by half a move, claiming the Men’s title.
Soon the day was over and the 40 odd of us queued for the showers. With the
bonfire up and going again, everyone was excited for movie night. Neil Margetts
showed up and presented his new vision for climbing in South Africa. Many
exciting things are happening and are going to be happening. It’s a good time to
be a climber in SA. Although it was too cold to sit anywhere outside a 2 m radius
from the fire, the movies definitely got us psyched to climb.
The next and final day was the bouldering semis and finals. So much
climbing, so little time! We got cracking right away and after an already hard
day of bouldering, it was down to me and Ilse in the finals and Marijus and
Andrew in the Men’s. We both sent all the final problems and so were going
to fight it out in a Superfinal. Marijus and Andrew also were head-to-head the
entire way right to the Mens’ Superfinal. We each took turns on a problem and
“It was down to me and Ilse in the finals and Marijus and Andrew
in the Men’s. We both sent all the final problems and so were
going to fight it out in a Superfinal.”

whoever got the furthest would be declared the winner.
And to add to the drama, each of us got to the same
high point as the other and so we went to the semifinal
scores. Ilse and Marijus had flashed more finals
problems than Andrew and I so that was the decider.
That night ended at Ting’s and Times in the student
village of Hatfield. Food was good, company was
great and the prizes were even better! UCT walked
away with the team prize, with Marijus and Duncan
on the podium for the lead comp, and UCT men
dominating the bouldering with Marijus, Andrew and
Duncan placing first, second and third respectively.
I represented my university and hopefully made
them proud with a first place lead and second place
bouldering. All in all, a great tournament! Thanks to
Peter, Ilse, JP, Lydia, Paul and everyone else who helped
make it possible. Candice – your KZN team will have
a tough job to match this year’s standards! Looking
forward to it!
FroM The CliMBerS
individual results Team results
Men sport climbing
1 Henrich Kahl (PUK) UCT
2 Marijus Smigelskis (UCT) PUK
3 Duncan Fraser (UCT) TUKS
Men bouldering
1 Marijus Smigelskis (UCT) UCT
2 Andrew Wood (UCT) PUK
3 Duncan Fraser (UCT) TUKS
Women sport climbing
1 Julia Chen (UCT) TUKS
2 Ilse Labuschagne (TUKS) UCT
3 Brumilda Badenhorst (PUK) WITS
Women bouldering
1 Ilse Labuschagne (TUKS) TUKS
2 Julia Chen (UCT) UCT
3 Emma Boyd (WITS) WITS
Mountain & Ski Club 2009 41

Tafelberg trad
SeBaSTian WyngaarD learns more than he anticipated
42 The University of Cape Town
after the very successful Trad 101 course and the Table Mountain meet
earlier in the year, Tafelberg, South Africa’s premier trad climbing
location, seemed like most suitable next step for our trad climbersin-the-making.
With Joe Mohle once again at the helm, our team of eager
climbers set out in search of fun and adventure in the heart of the Cedarberg.
The experienced trad climbers included Joe, Ant, Diana and Lars while the
newcomers consisted of Phil, Steve, Simon and me.
Thursday 19th Nov: Simon, Steve and I were the first to arrive at the
Driehoek campsite fairly late on Thursday evening. After setting up camp under
the Oak Trees beside the road, we waited for the rest of the team to arrive while
taking in the stellar night sky. Taking into consideration that we had to make an
early start for the hike up to the Spout Cave the next morning, it was not a great
start to the weekend for Joe, Ant and Phil when they arrived just after midnight
at the campsite. To make matters worse, Phil’s vW Polo suffered a punctured
tyre on the drive in. Just two weeks earlier he had punctured a tyre and had yet
to repair it. This left him with one flat tyre and no spare. Diana and Lars pitched
up even later during the night (or morning rather) after everyone else had
finished discussing the dilemma of the flat tyre and turned in.
Friday 20th Nov: We rose early to distribute food and gear and start the
fairly demanding walk in. Not far into the walk, Phil decided to abandon a little
blue tog bag containing a porcelain bowl, extra food and other amenities at
the side of the path since it was quite awkward to carry. Later, Joe would not
let him forget his mistake of leaving behind the much-desired bottle of Cane

within the little blue tog bag. Similarly, Lars later hid a tent on the side of the
path when informed that it would not be necessary. However, the consequences
for this action were negligible since it didn’t involve leaving any booze behind.
We eventually made it up to the base of The Spout, a relatively large formation
right next to the enormous Tafelberg, just in time for lunch. The sandy and
fairly well-sheltered Spout Cave would be our home for the next few days. Once
settled, we organised ourselves into groups and went off to climb.
Ant led Phil and me up Night Cap, a somewhat exposed two pitch grade 17.
Lars accompanied Diana up the same route a few minutes later. The relatively
easy Gully Buttress was Steve and Simon’s first encounter with Tafelberg’s
South Wall. Steve didn’t seem impressed with Joe’s gear placement though, a
single hex placement just a metre before the stance at the top of the 40 metre
climb. Joe later remarked that he “didn’t want you guys to think I’m reckless
or something.” After their first taste of Tafelberg, our newbies decided to play
around on the Original Route (17) and Woodro (18) while the rest of the gang
worked project (grade 27) on the ever conspicuous Pillar Box. Not content with
just following, Phil strayed off with Simon and Steve to test out his brand new
rack on Apathy (15) right before the sunset. We watched Ant and Diana conquer
Black Ice (19) from the Spout Cave as we started to prepare supper.
Sunset from the cave was beautiful, and after the long walk in supper never
tasted better. We ate, drank and promptly turned in for the night. The sound
of Lars snoring could be heard above the sound of the chilly breeze blowing
just beyond the warmth of the cave. Once the noise had died down, we awoke
to terrifying screams from within the dark cave. Apparently, Phil had had a
nightmare where he dreamed he was in a cave. Unfortunately for him, he was.
Saturday 21st Nov: We woke that morning to find that eight more people
had arrived during the night. They consisted of some of the Cape’s best trad
climbers including Douw Steyn and Gosia Lipinski.
FroM The CliMBerS
Mountain & Ski Club 2009 43

44 The University of Cape Town
“Once the noise had died down,
we awoke to terrifying screams
from within the dark cave.”
Simon and Steve asked Joe to take them up Maiden’s Prayer (16) that
morning. Meanwhile, Phil and I had decided to take on the Tafelberg Frontal
on our own. We thought a six pitch grade 13 would be a great opportunity to
test our gear placement skills while actually leading. The guide book had stated
“great route for its grade and a good introduction to the climbing in the area”
after all. Ultimately, however, it would be a test of our fortitude.
We set off at 10h00 in the rather chilly wind after having breakfast and few
sips of water, thinking we would make it back in time for lunch. Unfortunately,
not taking any food or water was the first of many mistakes. The first pitch
was a straight forward climb with lots of jugs onto a ledge where you could
set up a stance. We soon learned, however, that in trad climbing you have
to figure out where the route goes for yourself, there were no bolts to guide
you (or protect you, for that matter). This was evident when the second pitch
began with a down climb to the ledge below, where the stance was supposed
to be built, before the long but easy traverse to the next stance. Getting lost
and awkward down climbing was a recurring theme throughout the climb.
The next two pitches consisted of exciting chimney and crack climbing.
Interestingly enough, at one point I opted to climb inside a large crack instead
of proceeding up the arete on the outside of it. I explained that I had to
remove my helmet and shift my gear to my sides in order to make it through
a relatively tapered section within the crack. It was late in the afternoon and
well past lunchtime when we eventually made it to the end of the fourth pitch.
By now the wind had died down, our excitement had evolved into enjoyment as
we had proudly eased into the routine of placing gear. However, this was to be
the start of the troubles. The enjoyment soon evolved into determination as we
realised how late in the afternoon it actually was.

We started to pick up the pace now in order to be back before sunset. In
our haste, however, we had gone horribly off route. The route guide offered
no assistance, only the annoyingly frustrating realisation that we were lost.
Regardless, we climbed on in the hopes that we would somehow recognise
the descriptions in the route guide. We started on the tenth pitch, hungry and
tired. Phil started leading what seemed to be a grade 15 as the wind began to
pick up again. He set up a stance on a tiny ledge before belaying me who began
to follow after down climbing to retrieve a nut Phil had dropped earlier. Our
determination changed to feelings of anxiety and desperation when the light
started to fade as the sun steadily disappeared on the horizon. On my way up,
I struggled to retrieve a nut in darkness and ultimately had to leave it behind.
The wind was cold and howling to the point where we could barely hear each
other as we stood at the stance under the last pitch. We decided I would climb
the last pitch. I kitted up and ascended into the darkness of the route without a
headlamp. The climbing was simple but tense as I felt out the holds in the dark.
I ascended quickly and set up a belay. Phil followed with cellphone in mouth to
light the rock, collecting gear along the way. We were very happy to make it
up the Frontal and to the top of Tafelberg. Realising we had a decent cellphone
signal Phil, proceeded to call his girlfriend, “Babe, you would not believe what
just happened to me. I almost died!”.
By now everyone at camp began to worry, a rescue plan was put into action. Joe
and Ant went ahead in the dark with food, water and headlamps in search of the
lost climbers. Thinking that they may be spending the night on the Tafelberg rock
face, Steve and Simon followed with sleeping bags. Eventually, the very worried
and agitated team leader found a very relieved Phil and me who had just topped
FroM The CliMBerS
Mountain & Ski Club 2009 45

out. We arrived to applause once we finally made it back to the Spout Cave at
around 22h00 that night. The sad thing is that we still had to cook supper.
During the night, we once again awoke to the screams of Phil. We suspect
this time he dreamt he was still climbing on the Frontal.
Sunday 22nd Nov: After waking fairly late, Simon, Steve and I lumbered
towards the Apathy Wall for a second time to put our leading skills to the test
once more. It hadn’t worked out as we had hoped as we converted the single
pitch (30 metres) grade 15 into two pitches. A fairly experienced onlooker
commented, “Now you can see why they took so long on the Frontal.” Earlier
that morning Ant, Diana and Phil had a successful time with Bat, the highlyrated,
four pitch, classic grade 21 route on the Tafelberg’s Main Wall. In the
afternoon, Diana made easy work of Comes a Time (20) even after running
out the last third of the route (10 metres) when a bit of kit popped out. As she
watched the nut slide down the rope to settle ten metres below her, she said “I
guess that wasn’t a good placement!” She calmly proceeded to finish the climb.
That evening was the most beautiful by far, no wind at all and not a
cloud in sight. The stars shone brightly in the clear night sky. We cooked the
last of our food and proceeded to finish all of the alcohol. This lead to some
interesting conversations. For instance, if ever you have the opportunity to
meet Simon Braun, ask him, “Why do your feet stink?”.
Monday 23rd Nov: We rose early on Monday morning. Joe was off to attempt to
open the project he had been working after successfully opening the slightly easier
variation (grade 25) the day before. In the end, he didn’t manage to ascend and
would have to return someday to open the direct route. Ant lead Simon and Steve
up Tea Bag (15) on the Rooibosch Sector of the Main Wall while Diana easily linked
the five pitch Rooibosch (18) route into a lengthy two pitch climb with Phil and me.
For most, our stay in the Cedarberg had come to an end. Others were heading
off to climb at Rocklands for the coming week. Phil’s car keys in hand, Joe and
Lars were the first to make it back down to the Oak Trees. They hurried off to
Clanwilliam with Phil’s flat tyre in search of a mechanic. For some, my driving on
the way home would eventually be the most frightening part of the weekend.
Conclusion: Overall, it was a great weekend of climbing. The newcomers
had quite a decent amount of exposure to traditional climbing including
leading. The leaders enjoyed taking on the classic routes in the area. There has
been talk of another meet, soon.
46 The University of Cape Town

always bring both of your climbing shoes
Greg bought a brand new pair of climbing shoes for
this trip. Greg also decided he only needed to bring the
left one. *Slow clap for Greg*
always buy tuna in brine
The veg oil may be a little cheaper, but it’s a trap. It gets
everywhere and it stains. Seriously, spend the extra R1.
FroM The CliMBerS
20 things
i learned in rocklands
roBBie FraSer
During November of 2009 Duncan Fraser, Andrew Wood, Greg Bowden,
Julia Chen and myself set out for a 10 day stay in SA’s bouldering mecca.
We had loads of fun, and we might just have learned a few things…
pickettburg is amazing
Much like Disneyland, Pickettburg is a magical place
that lies exactly halfway between Rocklands and Cape
Town. This fantasy land is the home of the elusive
“Buster Burger”, a mythological meal that looks,
smells and tastes like a Spur burger, but costs half
the price. Also available at the Pickettburg garage is
the legendary Real Champs Get Thirsty. A soft drink
guaranteed to increase your sendage by 1.2%!
Mountain & Ski Club 2009 47

Don’t jump in the dam with your sunglasses on
Greg learned this. Unsurprisingly, Greg lost his glasses.
*Slow clap for Greg*
always drink all the champagne on the first night
Because… er… well, I’m sure we had a good reason
for this.
Slacklining is easy
Just focus on a single point in front of you, bend your
knees slightly and walk.
48 The University of Cape Town
Woody can’t slackline
No matter how many times he tried, he always ended
up in the drink. He also has a tendency to throw
boulders at other slackliners.
you can send when you least expect it
I sent my trip project on a throw-away attempt when I
was feeling my weakest. Perseverance always pays off!
It took Duncan six sessions to send his trip project.
Tape your wrists
Not only does it make you look significantly more
hardcore, but it helps avoid a lethal slicing if you want
to climb Dirty Lies.
Crate cake is surprisingly good
Clanwilliam Spar sells a cake in beer crate for R25.
Although it doesn’t look like much, the cake is actually
fantastic. Well, it beats Pronutro and water.
amber Cool is unsurprisingly bad
After our previous success with interestingly named
soft drinks, I thought I’d try the R5 for 2L bargain
of Amber Cool. The stuff is lethal. “It’s so damn hot,
Amber Cool was a bad choice”

Clanwilliam Spar is cool
Literally, besides the obvious fact that it’s a fantastic
place to buy stuff, it’s fully air conditioned. Loitering
for a couple of hours during mid day is highly
recommended.
always have a way down
Duncan fell into this trap many times after climbing
high boulders to take photos. Every time he got himself
stuck, and had to fall and break his legs.
always take photos
On our best day of climbing, when everyone sent their
projects, we got one photo… of Julia’s car… so that we
could get the time…
light trails are fun!
We managed to get some awesome long exposure shots
with headlamps. Lookout! It’s a glowing ninja!
Drop-knees are fun!
For the first time ever I’ve came across a problem
where a drop knee is easiest way to proceed. Collin The
Librarian is one of my all time favourite problems now!
FroM The CliMBerS
rocklands has signal
Up at the fortress, near Desperado, there is a spot
where you can get cellphone reception.
Duncan took the opportunity to secure a job interview.
Sleeping is an art
If you’re going in summer, you’d best be good at
sleeping. During the day it’ll be too hot to do anything
else.
panic room is hard
Easy 7B tick? yes please. Either I’m doing something
terribly wrong or everyone lies about it being easy,
probably the former. Either way, I got shut down.
go in winter
With temperatures in 40s you’ll end up doing most
of your climbing in caves, or at night. Summer is
definitely not Rocklands season.
Mountain & Ski Club 2009 49

one day, while surfing the net, I came across a photo of a small hill
covered in golden granite boulders somewhere in Botswana. I told my
friends about it and suggested we go check it out sometime. Everyone
agreed, but nothing really came of it. This picture lingered in the back of my
mind for several months until the winter of 2009 when the annual intervarsity
climbing competition is held, this year in Pretoria. I realised this would provide
the perfect opportunity to head northwest into Botswana. After doing some
more research, I started convincing my friends that we were all in need of a
bit of adventure and that we should go explore some virgin granite boulders in
a new land. Some were slightly apprehensive about driving to the edge of the
Kalahari looking for rocks guided by a single picture found on the internet, but
in the end, six hung-over UCT students piled into a combi after two hours sleep
and off we went…
50 The University of Cape Town
Botswana bloc
MarijuS ŠMigelSKiS sends it in virgin territory
Ok, let me back up a bit. Our first hurdle came before our trip even began.
Andrew Wood’s parents had kindly allowed us all to abuse their family combi
for the expedition. However, Andrew only realised days before, once most of us
were already in Pretoria, that his passport had expired. Fortunately he was able
to pull some strings in his small farming hometown in northern KZN and got
a temporary passport the morning he drove up to meet us and the rest of the
UCT team for the USSA competition. The competition came and went and soon
it was the prize-giving dinner, followed by partying in Hatfield which some
of us may not remember. We returned to The Barn at around 4am, scratched
the ice off our tents and crawled into bed for a bit of rest before our drive to
Gaborone at 6am.
Hurdle number two… We’re sitting in Pretoria morning traffic, trying to
head West. All of a sudden the combi stops accelerating. Six hours later, we
have a new clutch and we’re speeding along to make it to the border before it
closes for the night. By the way, Chicken Licken is amazing.
Hurdle number three… After negotiating the terrors of Botswana night
time drivers (maybe they don’t produce off switches for headlights brights over
there, and maybe the centre line on the road is a mere indication of where one
should drive, not an opposing lane marker) we arrive in Gaborone at around
midnight. We had very loose and unconfirmed plans to stay at a local climber’s
house for the night along with the vaguest directions ever with not a single
street name. We soon realised why though. After driving several times around
the highway that seems to loop the inner city and not finding a single street
sign, we realised we needed help. We managed to find a police station, where
we were sent to the traffic department (which consisted of a trailer out behind

the jail). After a long debate amongst themselves the police decide it’s easier
to escort us than try to explain how to get there. We follow the traffic cops,
speeding 30km above the limit and breaking just about every rule of the road
I can think of just to keep up with them. It’s 1am, we knock on the door and a
girl answers, she has no idea who we are and no idea about our supposed plan
to be staying there for the night. Fortunately, her housemate had sort of maybe
heard from somewhere that we might possibly be coming so she gives up her
room and all six of us pile in for the night.
The next morning dawns cool and clear and we set off for the village of
Thamaga. Driving into the Kalahari Basin, there isn’t much rock, so things
looked a bit sceptical at first. Soon however, small hills covered in rock start
popping up and eventually we get to the small settlement. We head straight
to the main hill in the centre of town and start exploring. There is a lot of rock
FroM The CliMBerS
“We camped out in the bush, cooked over a fire, climbed virgin rock and
debated physics late into the nights under a starry African sky.”
and we don’t know where to begin, so we decide to have some food and make
contact with some local climbers from Gaborone who we had emailed a few
times and that wanted to meet up with us. We find them on the North side of
the main hill and spend the afternoon establishing a few problems. Nothing
too significant, but several fun lines. Some local kids come join in on the fun
and scramble up the slabbier boulders barefoot. We failed to find anything
that really inspired us in Thamaga, although we only saw a tiny fraction of the
boulders there. So we moved on to another village further southwest called
Moshupo. We were all much more impressed with this second area. The hills
were smaller, easier to explore, and rockier. The quality of the granite also
seemed far better, it was less crystallised and more featured. The steep walls
had crimps and the slabs were blank enough for interesting climbing. We
camped out in the bush, cooked over a fire, climbed virgin rock and debated
physics late into the nights under a starry African sky.
We decide to focus our efforts on a single outcrop and, as a result, nearly
every problem we opened on Gotau Hill in Moshupo was a classic and still we
left so many boulders untouched. The very first problem we established was
10 metres from where we parked the combi – a perfect series of slaps up an
overhanging arête that we named “Donkey Kong” in honour of the population
of wild donkeys that seemed to easily exceed that of humans in Botswana.
Local story has it, once an aged donkey has been become too decrepit for any
further use, it is simply “traded-in” for a fresh, young one roped in cowboy
style from the wild. We climbed a few more problems at the roadside boulders
as a crowd of kids slowly gathered. Soon we had an audience of about 15
children that burst out laughing every time one of us fell with a dull thud onto
the bouldering pads. They seemed to find our failures highly amusing.
We, and our newly acquired entourage, starting moving up the hillside and
found more great problems. Andrew Wood opened a highly technical arête
which topped out up a huge flake wedged between two house-sized boulders
which he named “Hungry Lion”, while I focused on “Hot Soul Food” and several
other problems including a hanging slab perched between two boulders that
Mountain & Ski Club 2009 51

52 The University of Cape Town
had a campus start. Towards midday the African sun starts to get a bit too
hot for climbing, but fortunately I took a stroll around the hillside and found
another section of boulders that were shaded by large trees and offered plenty
new possibilities in much cooler conditions.
Andrew and I set to work on an arête, which had a series of perfect crimps
for the left hand and poor slopers on the corner for the right. We thrashed
around for an hour trying to figure out how to get our left heel-hook to stay on
a small crimp, which happened to also be occupied by our left hand. We tried
to shuffle our pinkie and ring fingers off the crimp to make room for our heel
“I had given up on any hope of success. Enter maple syrup. I took a
mouthful, neat, rested, and stuck the first move.”
but that did not seem to work very well. Eventually we realised the only way
to actually do the move was to heel-hook on your pinkie, then quickly pull your
hand out from under your heel and slap up to the next crimp before gravity
took over. This resulted in a wild cutloose off poor holds, a ravaged pinky and a
split tip, but in the end we persevered and Botswana’s first 7C boulder problem,
“Twin Paradox” was the result.
One line that particularly caught my attention was a short, blank,
overhanging prow. It was nothing spectacular, not more than four meters in
height, but it had everything I liked about climbing (except height of course).
Compression climbing on slopers! There are hardly any holds on the prow and
success on the problem depends entirely on your ability to squeeze negative
sloper pinches hard enough to lift your body off the ground and make a huge
slap up to a poor sloper. From there the next few moves ease off a bit, but are
by no means easy. I was very psyched that there were enough features for the
line to be climbable and it was the last problem I tried on our trip. My first
attempts were not very confidence boosting and I failed miserably to even
pull off the ground. I managed to work out the sequence for the problem for
the first moves onwards, but it seemed unlikely that I would walk away with
a send this trip. I kept trying the first move for another half hour, annoying
all my friends who had had enough and just wanted to go home. They, along
with myself, had given up on any hope of success. Enter maple syrup. I took a
mouthful, neat, rested, and stuck the first move. It nearly felt easy! I held on
extra tight and made sure I did not slip on the rest of the moves and seconds
later, I was on top! We decided to grade the problem 8A, making it the hardest
bit of climbing in Botswana. Sticking to our accidental theme of naming
everything we climbed either about physics or chicken, I named the problem
“Dark Matter”.
With a nice range of problems opened, we were all happy to call our trip a
success and head on back to South Africa. We left Moshupo knowing we will
return one day and I sure would recommend a trip out there for anyone who
wants a different experience in their climbing. At least know you know there is
good rock and tons of potential.
We filmed all of our sends and a clip will soon be posted on
www.cutloose.ca.tt. For more info email marijus3@gmail.com.
Marijus Šmigelskis is sponsored by Evolv, Trango and Blue Water.

Chasing
orange flags
niCK De KlerK tells us why his socks are
no longer white
okay, welcome to the article none of you know exists. This is almost not
so much a Mountain and Ski Club report so much as What-I-Did-In-My-
Spare-Time. This, Ladles and Jelly spoons, is the Orienteering Report!
you all just went “Sorry, what??” didn’t you. Well don’t fret; I’m here to
explain what happens in this dark and dusty nook of the club. At the moment
there is me. That’s it. Hopefully this will serve as a bizarre recruitment scheme
in fact; officially this corner of the club does not exist. It is my aim, nay, my
quest, my divine purpose to reinstate it. Orienteering, in short, is the sport of
“I managed to pull ahead, but with 10m to go completely bailed on the
uneven ground and fell flat on my face…”
anD Then…
running around aimlessly trying to find silly orange flags. Think cross country
running without an actual route. you get a map, you take a compass and you
set about trying to make your way from checkpoint to checkpoint. First one
back wins. Last one back is usually me. Sound simple enough?
This year I was the sole and only person running under the UCT-MSC banner
(although various technicalities meant this was in spirit only, officially I was
forced to be part of Peninsula Orienteering Club. This is a technicality I will
be eradicating this coming year) and did rather well in a few events. Please
indulge me as I recap my year’s highlights. Hopefully by next year this will be a
longer list, with more people’s highlights and more people’s memories.
The year kicked off with the sprint series. These are 3-4 km routes, usually
in semi-urban areas ranging from Tokai Forrest to UCT upper campus. Having
got lost in Tokai, and misread my map around UCT and all manner of things
happening in who knows where else, the final race of the sprint series was
in Bishopscourt, and after a huge bunching at a rather tricky control the race
became a bunch sprint for the line. I managed to pull ahead, but with 10m to
go completely bailed on the uneven ground and fell flat on my face, much to
Mountain & Ski Club 2009 53

54 The University of Cape Town
the mirth of those assembled at the finish. My overall time was good enough
for 6th (my best finish all season).
From the short stuff the races progressed to the colour coded events. Colour
coded means there are different courses depending on your ability or level of
fitness. Not exactly a gym bunny by any stretch I always naïvely sign up for
blue or brown (the longest and toughest courses) and regret my decision soon
after. On my return to Tokai (after a disastrous sprint) my race was naught by
a comedy of errors. I bailed on a collapsed fence, spent 5 minutes directly in
front of a control not-seeing it, and then decided to forgo a path to bundu bash,
and end up running for 10 minutes in knee high fynbos. This I assure you is the
single worst feeling for your legs. To cap a poor day out off, I got a cramp with
200m to go, and then still had a 2km walk back to the train station to negotiate.
The next outing was a fun one. The Western Cape Orienteering Championships
were held just outside Grabouw this year and not only did it transpire I was the
only UCT-MSC runner, I was also the only person in my age group competing for
the sprint race (on Day 1). This it turned out was rather fortunate for me as I pulled
the mother of all blunders and managed to run off 90 degrees off from where I
should have, only to find another piece of land that looked almost exactly like
where I was meant to be. A course I should have completed in 30 minutes took over
an hour. Ouch. But at least I won by default.
Day 2 of the competition was the classic distance. For my age group (under 20)
this was an 8.1 km race, and I was up against a 16 year old (who had competed
with the over 21s the previous day and placed 3rd!). Thankfully no such stuffups
that day apart from one point where I was searching in a field of Anthills for the
correct anthill. Not an easy task. I completed the course in 2hr 10, half an hour
behind my competitor. Still, gold and silver for default prizes is rather nice.
At the Gauteng Championships I had stiffer competition. There were three

of us racing, and with a fairly good race, I managed to pull off 2nd place in the
short course. The long course was fairly crazy (it’s open Highveld, so there is no
shade, a far cry from running around in forests in WC) and there was one point
where I basically had to daredevil down what was almost a cliff face. At speed.
That, surprisingly, was the easy bit; it was running back up that killed me. All
my efforts landed me only 3rd place.
A few other bits of fun running around Grabouw and it was time for the
main event of the year, the South African Champs. This year it was held in
Sabie in Mpumalanga. It was a lovely forest setting, with some fairly tricky but
fast routes. Day one saw all but one of the 4 competitors make fairly large stuff
ups on the short course. Alas I was not the one (managing to take a wrong turn
and be fairly far off-track). By the time I dragged myself across the finish line I
was alas only finishing back in 3rd place, 6 minutes off The Wits runner in 2nd.
The next day was the main event, the South African Championships Classic
Distance. I managed to take a turn too early and wind up in a river gorge with
sheer cliffs either side of me, and the only option to cut across a 200m wide
thicket. I also managed to get cramp in both calves simultaneously and had to
stop and stretch them out. After 8.1kms only 20 minutes separated the Wits
runner in first place from the last place runner (yes, me). Again a tale of “whatif”
for my fledgling orienteering career.
Okay, so most of my stories involve me getting lost or having my legs ripped
to shreds by Fynbos and thorns. This is possibly the world’s worst marketing
campaign, but for all you outdoor loving runners with a knack for map reading
(and perhaps a slight bent for self mutilation) you now know that you have a
corner of the MSC to call home (or at the very least, have timeshare).
anD Then…
“…there was one point where I
basically had to daredevil down
what was almost a cliff face. At
speed. That, surprisingly, was the
easy bit…”
Mountain & Ski Club 2009 55

Chocolate
56 The University of Cape Town
bananas
KuSh Singh
Ingredients
• One banana
• Chopped up chocolate of your choice
• Foil
Method
Slice banana down the middle but be careful not to cut
the bottom.
Pack it tightly with chocolate.
Seal the banana and wrap in foil.
Place in coals or oven for 10–12 mins and turn. Remove
after another 10–12 mins.
Open foil and scoop out melted chocolatey banana
goodness with a spoon. Warning: it can be hot if just
off the coals or out of the oven.
Suggestion
Try different chocolates e.g. plain chocolate, Top Deck,
caramel. you can also put marshmallows or condensed
milk in with the chocolate.
Adult version (not for under 18s ;)
Once you have stuffed your banana with chocolate,
drizzle some Amarula (or Cape velvet) over it and
seal and follow instructions as before. This alcoholic
banana will be an absolute treat on any camping trip!

Dear Comrades
In the name of taxi driverhood, I salute you! We have worked long and hard
towards this day, and finally a few small victories have been granted us.
FroM The oFFiCialS
Last week we attacked a golf course, since the Official Taxi Book of Law clearly
states that there is to be NO driving whatsoever within a 20-kilometre radius
of our taxi rank unless it is either done by us or involves the payment of
considerable bribes to whoever’s meant to be enforcing the rules. Can you believe
this, comrades? Driving of golf balls being done right on our doorstep? This was
clearly an abomination, and it is fortunate that we managed to stop it before
they got the ball rolling.
Another victory came when we managed to steal fifty toy minibuses from a toy
shop in our area. Apparently the shop owner’s sly intention was to sell these
buses to kids, allowing them to play games where they carried passengers around
--- possibly even pretending to charge them for it and then keeping the money.
Friends, we all know the effect of play on children’s development. Consider
the consequences if parents were to praise this behaviour, thereby positively
reinforcing it. Children would grow up and attempt to start their own taxi
businesses all over the place, and we would be hard-pressed to stem the tide. We
have limited ammunition, after all.
It was suggested in a taxi association meeting yesterday that, instead of fighting
the sale of toy minibuses, it would be more advantageous to our bank accounts in
the long run if we simply forced shop owners to hand out a set of instructions
with each minibus they sell. The instructions should explain to children that
99,85% of all money they earn should go towards our taxi association, and that
they will be killed if they refrain from obeying. According to our consulting
psychologist Dr GivememywigbackorIwillkillyou, threats have a remarkable effect
on the developing human psyche.
And as a last tribute to our sustained efforts to maintain a monopoly, this
morning we succeeded in preventing a group of teenagers from going on a
mountain outing. In typical arrogant Rondebosch fashion, a group of university
students hired a private minibus to transport twenty teenagers from our area to
Silvermine Nature Reserve.
Do you see anything wrong with this picture, dear friends? In the first place
we were not involved; they claim the reason for this is that we are unreliable.
What nonsense! Our association’s tardiness policy is among the most progressive
in the world. It even takes into account Einstein’s Theory of Special Relativity.
According to Einstein time moves more slowly for bodies travelling at great
speeds, and since we always travel at multiple times the speed of light, it is
perfectly understandable that we often seem to arrive later than expected.
In the second place, we object strongly to the idea of some of our kids going
on outings with a bunch of spoilt brats from UCT. What if the children had fun
and decided they wanted to go to university as well? Or even worse, what if
they developed the capacity for leadership and independent thinking? They might
even get rich and leave. This must be avoided at all costs: if we’re going to be
struggling and suffering, everyone else had better be struggling and suffering
with us.
This concludes our weekly newsletter. Please keep an eye out for next week’s
edition, in which we discuss how to annoy motorists, how to avoid paying traffic
fines and how to glue your minibus back together.
In the meantime, happy taxiing.
Lizelle Niit
Mountain & Ski Club 2009 57

Cheese with that w(h)ine?
jp roux tries to remember
everybody knows we only include the cheese to
make it sound polite. This becomes apparent
when an entire corner of the room is filled with
5l boxes of 19-something-or-other Cab-something-orother,
and the sum total of the cheese fits on a regular
household cutting board. Oh well. Line your stomach
before you attend one of our (cheese and) wine parties
then. The 2009 shin dig was held at the water polo
club. What a great venue! Conservative estimates
place attendance at around 100. The cheese was
finished by the first three lucky arrivals. As the night
progressed a strong correlation developed between
the number of empty papsakke and the discarding of
inhibiting pieces of clothing. This culminated in nude
and lewd activities in the pool. There may or may
not have been an intervention from campus security.
Come to think of it, I’m really not in a position to give
58 The University of Cape Town
a factual account of the evening’s proceedings. At
some point I must have insulted Jem or his girlfriend
or his family. This is the only explanation for why he
was chasing me at full speed through the parking lot
in front of Kopano. At some point before this Chris
Laidler left the party. This is the only explanation for
why he was driving through the same parking lot in
the opposite direction in his Land Rover. At one point
it dawned on me that running into the glaring lights
was possibly not advised. There wasn’t much time
to think (not that I had the capacity at that point),
so I played dead as I felt the force of something a
lot bigger and heavier crash into me. There was the
simultaneous dull thud of flesh-and-bone against
inanimate matter. At some point I was flying, and
shortly after I was dying. Then I was laughing
hysterically whilst other people looked on concerned.

On
Spontaneity
jereMy gorven
in Borneo is a cave so vast that a 747 could fly
through it, Dear Cave. Inside, 3 million Wrinklelipped
bats cling to the roof. Below them lies a
100 metre high mound of guano – bat droppings.
The surface of this mound is covered by millions of
cockroaches and all manner of kruipende dinge. These
creatures have no eyes and no ears. They are confined
to the writhing heap and the pitch black, to live off
guano for the rest of their days.
On the other side of the world, and on the
opposite side of the spectrum, students with limitless
possibilities arrive in the beautiful city of Cape Town
for their first year at UCT.
One of the many topics which spur endless debate
around the campfire, is that of destiny. I don’t believe in
destiny. At UCT, the most powerful ability I gained, the
most precious gift I received was that of spontaneity.
As the shock of cold water pulsed through me
I am drowned in silence. I revel for a split second
in the feeling of life which the coldness brings. My
senses heightened, my adrenaline pumping; the
moment is pure, unadulterated ecstasy. Opening my
eyes in the clear waters of the Hottentots Holland, I
breaststroke to the other side of Bumslide pool where
my companions stand smiling and chatting against
the lush green Fynbos backdrop of the kloof. This was
my first great adventure with the MSC, my first plunge
and my first exhilaration.
From then on, each spontaneous moment delivered
a new experience and a new adventure. Spontaneity
spawned spontaneity, and time after time we had our
worlds rocked. From hanging off a crag in Montague, to
waking up in Hoare Hut for a steaming breakfast of oats,
a fiery display of light and colour glinting off the frozen
slopes of Waaihoek as the dawn breaks. All of a sudden
I found myself surrounded by a crew which I hope to
keep forever. These guys were amped for anything. We
were all addicted to thrilling adventures together, and
it was their company which made my four years at UCT
anD Then…
worth fifty anywhere else. We soon began to wander,
from the rusty mountains of the Cederberg to the
mighty escarpment of the Ukahlamba Darkensburg in
KZN. Soon there was talk of an expedition to climb the
Rwenzoris in East Africa. We finally knew that life had
no limits and that any dream could become a reality. A
group of 7 bumped along a small dirt road in Uganda,
slowly winding through coffee plantations toward the
base of the mighty Mt Stanley.
UCT is over now. What has come of it all? What
does one leave with after all of this adventure, after
the crazy-adorable people are just a memory, after
the fun is captured in pictures and lives on only in
the whistling of the old wind as it gushes over point
high and down the steep grassy triangle. What of the
stunning beauty which still takes my breath away
whenever I flip through an album, and which once
made me feel as though I had glimpsed the very brush
strokes of God in Her most glorious act of creation.
It kills me to know that these moments are finite,
that these people will grow and disperse to far away
places. I wish that I could live these memories forever,
live amongst these people until my legs fail me, and
then still I’ll implore them to throw me into that cold
pool, deep in the Hottentots Holland. Alas, all will
eventually fade. This is regret.
This regret brings a lesson. It is spontaneity. I
believe this holds the secret to how we define our
own lives. you were born with this gift. Embrace it as
though the world is spinning through space and time
at a billion miles an hour. Do justice to the opportunity
of life with a dazzling array of experiences, people,
love, passion, sounds, smells and emotions. Thank you
MSCers, you rock my world!
Mountain & Ski Club 2009 59

Notes from the Waaihoek Time Capsule, some from
as far back as the 1980s. See anyone you know?
60 The University of Cape Town

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