Why do Asians really get straight A's? - Project Gutenberg Consortia ...

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letters on the top of my hand. “ Don't wash your hands, ” Emilie instructs, “ and you better call. ” She smiles with a hint of seriousness. I pull out my mobile phone from my right pocket, scrolling down to select the camera option. With the click of a button, I take a snapshot of her number on my hand. “ In the event that my left hand gets chopped off, I can still call you with my right.” “ I like a guy with a sense of humor. Anyway, I gotta get going. Do call me. ” Emilie departs through the door, looking fantastic in her @ss-hugging jeans. I like @ss-hugging jeans— correction: I love @ss-hugging jeans. I can't believe what just happened! I don't know how, but I think I got lucky. Actually, I know I got lucky. How could I, a certifiable loser— as verified by my parents and numerous other sources— get the phone number of literally the most beautiful girl at UCI? What can she possibly see in me? It can't be because of the size of my you-know-what because everyone knows that Asian guys are small you-know-where. All jokes aside, can it be that Emilie empathizes with me, sharing the same parental pressure of becoming a doctor, thus, forming a common bond altogether? Maybe I shouldn't ask so many questions and just be happy with my situation. And I should be happy that things are really changing for me, for the better, much better than I can ever hope for. I've let my parents control me all of my life and in turn, inducing my criticism of Asian culture. It will be different now, since things are really looking up. I'm starting to feel much better about my life. Perhaps it's not so bad to be Asian.
9 I hate grocery shopping by myself, especially when my parents make me come here to Culver Plaza, the Chinatown of Irvine and ergo Orange County. It's always crowded with Asian people of course, all looking for a wide selection of cheap Asian goods. Now when I say cheap, I don't mean just the price; I also mean the quality. Many people are aware of lead toys manufactured in China, but not many are aware of cadmium-laden kitchenware, which has been linked to birth defects and cancer; or chopped up pieces of bleached cardboard in frozen wontons; or contaminated, toxic pet food that has killed a copious number of animals here in the United States; or milk and baby formula laced with melamine, a banned industrial chemical, the same chemical used in the contaminated, toxic pet food; or the extreme levels of formaldehyde— normally for embalming dead bodies— used in clothing, and unbelievably, also in noodles which prompted the shutdown of one of the biggest noodle manufacturers in China. Not to mention the complete violation of human rights and the advocacy of slave labor, but of course, Asians don't care because it's always about the money, so ethical and moral values go out the window. It's not just with the Chinese; the Vietnamese also use formaldehyde in their noodles, and the Thais fry their foods with thin layers of plastic lacquer for a crispier texture— whatever it takes to make a buck, never mind your health. I find it interesting that Asian people like to buy the most expensive houses and the most expensive cars, yet, they shop for the absolute cheapest food, groceries, cleaning products, kitchenware— anything else, you name it. Asians will only spend lots of money on items that they can show off but be cheap with items that they can't. In Asia, for instance, there is a flood of counterfeit— aka knock-off— items from fake designer clothes and accessories to fake Rolex watches and mobile phones— anything else, you name it. Remember what I said about Asians wanting to show off? Asians love to buy fake name-brand clothing and other fake name-brand items in order to show off— Asian Pride
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Why do Asians really get straight A
Page 4 and 5: Yellow on the Outside, Shame on the
Page 6 and 7: THANKS TO: You, the reader Ryan & C
Page 8 and 9: Outset
Page 10 and 11: gigolo? A gigolo only screws one pe
Page 12 and 13: “ Are you daydreaming again? ”
Page 14 and 15: didn't come to America for the free
Page 16 and 17: pay taxes, fees, and other expenses
Page 18 and 19: school program, to strengthen and d
Page 20 and 21: 3 I got up this morning feeling ver
Page 22 and 23: Since it's an Asian custom to alway
Page 24 and 25: that's when they get you for the bi
Page 26 and 27: slaps my right arm and says, “ Yo
Page 28 and 29: pressure from my parents. Plus, Asi
Page 30 and 31: that this guy thinks incest is best
Page 32 and 33: 5 I start to fall asleep at the whe
Page 34 and 35: my eyes. “ All these yuppies are
Page 36 and 37: the picture. Before stepping into t
Page 38 and 39: that plenty of Asians have endured
Page 40 and 41: Of course, cops would always use th
Page 42 and 43: and even a Starbucks inside for all
Page 44 and 45: goodbye to them. “ Gabriel! What'
Page 46 and 47: “ And this is coming from a perso
Page 48 and 49: That's great if that's what she rea
Page 50 and 51: 8 I can't believe that I actually f
Page 52 and 53: Rushing to my molecular biology cla
Page 56 and 57: Theorem Number 2: Status; because i
Page 58 and 59: is quite discourteous. I almost got
Page 60 and 61: 10 Waiting at the airport is easily
Page 62 and 63: happen to me— feather duster! So
Page 64 and 65: Who really needs to work 100 hours
Page 66 and 67: 11 The plane lands as I start to wa
Page 68 and 69: just for the sake of getting a gift
Page 70 and 71: With all of us at the kitchen table
Page 72 and 73: grades they get and most importantl
Page 74 and 75: light up the incense— provided to
Page 76 and 77: Asian people are so obsessed with m
Page 78 and 79: Interlude
Page 80 and 81: throat and ease my nervousness. Per
Page 82 and 83: for-a-date routine, which isn't rea
Page 84 and 85: through me with ineffable waves of
Page 86 and 87: uy all of our groceries. How about
Page 88 and 89: answer that you get. Then come and
Page 90 and 91: willingly put my trust in her. She
Page 92 and 93: Calliope alludes, with a perplexed
Page 94 and 95: ut she explains to me that the brok
Page 96 and 97: oad, other than mine of course, and
Page 98 and 99: picture frame, right next to the bo
Page 100 and 101: want to admit that they failed as p
Page 102 and 103: 16 Today is the greatest day in the
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testicles, obviously not his own be
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17 Today's the big day. Today will
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The instructor comes into the room
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do well the second time. Plus we'll
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toasted almond flakes along the sid
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19 My phone is ringing off the hook
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“ Yeah. This is a snack. I'm a gr
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segregation by the restaurant. I fi
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Hollywood is f*cked up but it's als
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spike heel platforms, peeping-tom p
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We both stagger down the hallway, a
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20 Today's the big day. Today will
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now we're doing the complete opposi
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The main problem with the cupidity
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that I've always wanted from my par
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with the power of control, per my A
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year programs. Do you know why it's
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(continued) Question: Do you know t
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