Why do Asians really get straight A's? - Project Gutenberg Consortia ...

same, old scenery. What makes it worse is the heavy traffic, as you already know. But the
good thing about getting here early is getting a great parking spot, right in front of the School
of Biological Sciences. Now I have all the time in the world to plan out what to say to Emilie.
I'm in my first class of the day, biochemistry, feeling very tense and anxious. Time is a
killer especially when you're waiting for the big moment. So I decide, for the very first time
ever, to get out of class early just so I can go to the bathroom to freshen up, you know, to work
my magic and get ready for Emilie.
I'm standing at the urinal “ doing my thing ” when I notice, at the corner of my eye, a
guy standing right behind me, looking rather pensive and uncertain. There are a total of five
urinals in the men's bathroom, with me occupying the one farthest to the left, the remaining
four are empty. For you ladies out there, please understand that a guy should never stand
behind you if the other urinals are empty— that's what we call gay. Anyway, I finish “ doing my
thing ” and as I leave the bathroom, I see the guy immediately dashing to the center urinal, to
do “ his thing. ”
I ponder for a moment about his bizarre behavior and then I realize that this guy suffers
from shy bladder syndrome— supposedly a new disease according to a news article I read a
few months ago— in which a person experiences trouble peeing when there are people
around him. I can't believe this is actually a disease. For crying out loud, AIDS is on the rise,
cancer is everywhere, but we now have a more serious disease known as shy bladder
syndrome! Are you kidding me? What's so shy about peeing? There's a very easy way to
resolve his shy bladder syndrome and since I'm so nice, I'll help that guy out: I'll let him hold
my penis while I pee, just to show him that there's nothing to be shy about. If I can do it,
anyone can! Okay, maybe I won't let him hold my penis— actually, hell no I won't let him— but if
shy bladder is a big problem for him, all he needs to do is drink massive amounts of water,
then his body will have no choice but to pee, even with people around. Do it enough times
and it'll break the mental block, like the mental block a professional baseball player
experiences during a slump, in which the skill to hit is there but something is just in the way
mentally. By drinking massive amounts of water over time, he'll start peeing in front of people
and eventually break the mental block. After time, he'll start peeing normally with no more shy
bladder. Who needs medical school if someone like me can start curing diseases like shy
bladder syndrome? Anyway, I'll stop playing doctor since I need to get ready for my big
moment: Emilie.