The Boy Next Door - Weebly

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To: John Trent From: Jason Trent Subject: You are unbelievable Film Forum? That's why you can't be at the dedication? You're going to the movies? The redhead has something to do with this, doesn't she? To: Nadine Wilcock From: Mel Fuller Subject: My Date-A-Logue 18:00 Preparation for my date begins. I put on the stunning little blue dress you helped me pick out. I notice that it looks a little too stunning for dinner and a movie. Add a cotton sweater. Mom would be pleased. Remember her adage: You know how cold it can get in movie theaters in the summertime. Practice walking in new platform mules for half an hour. Only turn my ankle twice. I'm ready as I'll ever be. 18:30 Depart for downtown. Know I must look nice, as I am groped on the 9 train between Times Square and Penn Station. Elbow groper in the midriff. Receive round of applause from fellow strap-hangers. Groper disembarks, looking shame-faced. 19:00 Arrive outside movie theater. There is a huge line! Scan line nervously for John (did I tell you Max asked me to call him John? It's an old college nickname). Finally spot him at end of line, already holding tickets. My plan to go Dutch (therefore making this an outing between friends, and not a date, per your suggestion) instantly ruined! I rally by informing him I will buy popcorn and sodas. You will be pleased to know that John graciously acquiesces to this plan. 19:00-19:20 Stand in line chatting about giant sink hole that has opened up on Church Street. You know how I love weather disasters. Well, it turns out John does, too! This leads to a long conversation about our favorite disasters--though we spoke very softly in case anyone in line with us might have lost a relative in the latest tsunami or an F5 tornado, or something. 19:21 Line begins to move. John goes to find seats. I go to buy popcorn and soda. Realize with dismay I forgot to tell him to get me a seat on the aisle due to absurdly small bladder. But when I get inside the theater, he has done just that--saved me the aisle seat! Now, really, Nadine, has Tony ever once let you have the aisle seat? No, never, and you know it. 19:30-21:30 Watch movie. Eat popcorn. Notice John can chew and breathe through his nose at the
same time. This is a marked improvement over Aaron, who you will recall had a problem with that. I wonder if Dolly has noticed it yet. Also, John does not look at his watch while the movie is running. This was one of Aaron's most annoying habits. Then I notice that John does not even wear a watch. Definitely an improvement over Aaron, who not only wore one but checked it obsessively every twenty minutes. 21:30-22:00 We walk over to Brothers Barbecue and discover that it, like most popular Manhattan eateries, has been overrun by out-of-towners. There is a two hour wait for a table. I suggest we go for a slice at Joe's, which as you know has the best pizza in the city. On the way, John tells amusing anecdote about his brother and a drunken midnight pilgrimage to Joe's. I say I did not know he had a brother, and then he says he meant a fraternity brother. This is upsetting: I don't know if I ever told you that after a particularly embarrassing incident involving a Delta Upsilon and a sock back when I was in college, I vowed never again to date another frat guy. Then I remembered that this was not a date, but a friendly outing like you suggested, and I was able to relax again. 22:30-24:00 Pizza consumed standing up because there is no place to sit. While we eat, I relate amusing anecdote about how one time I ran into Gwyneth Paltrow at Joe's, and she ordered a slice with veggies and sauce but no cheese! This leads to discussion about my job, and how much I want to write features. It turns out John has been reading Page Ten, and admires my sprightly but pithy style! Those were the words he used! Sprightly! And pithy! I am sprightly and pithy, aren't I? So then I tried to talk to him about his job. I thought I could subtly find out the truth about that whole nipple thing. But he didn't want to talk about himself at all! He just wanted to know where I went to college, and stuff like that. He kept asking all these questions about Lansing. As if that's interesting! Although I did my best to make it interesting. I told him about the time the Hell's Angels came to town, and of course about the tornado that took out the middle school's cafeteria (unfortunately during summer, so we didn't even get out of going to class). Finally, I ran out of steam and suggested we head home. But on our way to the subway, we passed a bar where live blues were being played! You know I can't resist the blues. I don't know if he saw me looking wistful or what, but he went, Let's go in. When I saw there was a $15 cover and two drink minimum I was like, No, we don't have to, but he said he'd buy the drinks if I paid the cover, which I thought was very decent because you know those places charge like ten bucks just for a beer, and so we went in and I got a second wind and had a very fun time and drank beer and ate peanuts and threw the shells on the floor and then the band took a break and we realized it was midnight and we were both like, Oh, my God! Paco! So we rushed home--we split a cab, which was expensive, but at that time of night was much faster than the subway--and got home before any major accidents or howling had occurred, and I said good night by the elevator, and he said we should do it again sometime, and I said I would love that and that he knows how to reach me, and then I went into my apartment and took a shower to wash all the smoke from the bar out of my hair, and Febrezed my new dress. You will note that no passes were made (by either party) and that everything was very friendly and above board and mature. And now I hope you are ashamed of yourself for all the mean things you thought about him because he is really very sweet and funny and wore the nicest jeans I ever saw, not
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The Boy Next Door The Boy Next Door
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I thought I heard your name, of all
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7:55--Stagger to kitchen. Ingest no
Page 7 and 8: her brain from a giant blood clot t
Page 9 and 10: To: Aaron Spender From: Mel Fuller
Page 11 and 12: the wedding's off. Every girl in my
Page 13 and 14: To: Mel Fuller From: Nadine Wilcoc
Page 15 and 16: Well, enjoy! And you make sure you
Page 17 and 18: To: Mel Fuller From: George Sanche
Page 19 and 20: From: Mel Fuller Subject: I can't
Page 21 and 22: prostituting himself out for photo
Page 23 and 24: To: Tom Barrett From: Max Friedlan
Page 25 and 26: To: Jason Trent From: John Trent
Page 27 and 28: To: Max Friedlander From: John Tre
Page 29 and 30: To: Jason Trent From: John Trent
Page 31 and 32: you who are born into money, the in
Page 33 and 34: What's more important to him, a bun
Page 35 and 36: Subject: Well???? DON'T TELL NADINE
Page 37 and 38: all. Although I guess it wasn't rea
Page 39 and 40: To: Mel Fuller From: Aaron Spender
Page 41 and 42: From: Jason Trent Subject: How'd I
Page 43 and 44: Your loving sister-in-law, Stacy To
Page 45 and 46: And you do???????????? To: Sergeant
Page 47 and 48: prints, etc. But unless that happen
Page 49 and 50: From: Tony Salerno Subject: Cut it
Page 51 and 52: ad as you say, or are you exaggerat
Page 53 and 54: Sure. The seven o'clock show would
Page 55 and 56: of you at Stella's baby shower. And
Page 57: To: John Trent From: Jason Trent
Page 61 and 62: To: Nadine Wilcock From: Mel Fulle
Page 63 and 64: To: jerrylives@freemail.com From: M
Page 65 and 66: ever coming to visit us again. Are
Page 67 and 68: PS I don't have to tell you how muc
Page 69 and 70: To: jerrylives@freemail.com From: J
Page 71 and 72: To: Mel Fuller From: Tony Salerno
Page 73 and 74: humiliating! Tim Grabowski from Pro
Page 75 and 76: about dogs and chicken bones.... We
Page 77 and 78: was how much I hate the Chronicle,
Page 79 and 80: still have tomorrow's column to do.
Page 81 and 82: But what I simply cannot forgive yo
Page 83 and 84: PS You'll never guess what! One of
Page 85 and 86: Tim To: Tim Grabowski From: Nadine
Page 87 and 88: Friend Tim: Likewise, I'm sure. Our
Page 89 and 90: Subject: Miss Fuller Dearest John,
Page 91 and 92: To: John Trent From: Stacy Trent >
Page 93 and 94: PS We're out of Cheerios. Can you p
Page 95 and 96: To: Mel Fuller From: Aaron Spender
Page 97 and 98: ecipe for crab-stuffed flounder. I
Page 99 and 100: From: Mel Fuller Subject: My Last
Page 101 and 102: my sheets, which are sticky now, bu
Page 103 and 104: as far as I could tell. I mean, the
Page 105 and 106: From: Mel Fuller Subject: Snickerd
Page 107 and 108: To: Mel Fuller From: Nadine Wilcoc
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To: Mel Fuller From: Nadine Wilcoc
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knocked a little while ago, but you
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IS THERE SOMETHING WRONG WITH YOU??
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LOVE, BRITTANY AND ASHLEY To: John
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To: David J. Belew From: John Tren
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Okay, I know it's been a long time
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hours. She never goes twenty-four h
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Tim To: Nadine Wilcock From: Georg
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To:Nadine Wilcock From: Mel Fuller
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I just don't understand what a guy
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To: Mel Fuller From: George Sanche
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Now, we can't really tell if any of
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Anyway, she's wracked all my credit
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was just lovely, and Donny looked s
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ight? Did you tell her it was too l
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To: Dolly Vargas From: Mel Fuller
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To: Nadine Wilcock From: Mel Fulle
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To: Sebastian Leandro From: Max Fr
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To: Mel Fuller From: jerrylives@fr
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Subject: Well, this is it We're lea
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that means it’s time for WORKING?
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To: Mel Fuller From: jerrylives@fr
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To: John Trent From: Stacy Trent
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To: jerrylives@freemail.com From:Me
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stalls.... Go in there and tell her
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security desk, trying to get signed
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To: Mel Fuller From: Dolly Vargas
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pursue a restraining order against
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Something has got to be done about
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could do for all the advice she's g
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think we should just print a big bl
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To: John Trent From: Michael Evere
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If Trent doesn't sue the pants off
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From: Sergeant Paul Reese Subject:
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To: John Trent From: Mel Fuller S
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To: Nadine Wilcock From: Mel Fulle
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To: Mel Fuller From: Max Friedland
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To: John Trent From: Mel Fuller S
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To: Max Friedlander From: Sebastia
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anyway. And what do you think happe
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I would be honored to go to lunch w
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I just spoke with John. He is so do
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whole thing with John has sent you
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Geez, calm down, will you? Max isn'
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To: Tony Salerno From: Nadine Wilc
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Tim Grabowski ; George Sanchez Fro
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From: Mel Fuller Subject: Lunch Oh
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To: George Sanchez From: Mel Fulle
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From: Genevieve Randolph Trent Sub
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But Nadine, I do now, I really beli
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To: Mel Fuller From: Max Friedland
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Don't try to tell me she won't, eit
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Um, I think she had to do some rese
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Max: Don't you know it. Then she ha
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"The perpetrator wished to throw in
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To: Mel Fuller From: Vivica@sophis
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To: Mel Fuller From: John Trent S
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The Boy Next Door - Weebly

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