The Boy Next Door - Weebly

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To: John Trent From: Jason Trent Subject: Max Friedlander The horses don't dance in dressage, you moron. They step. And have you ever considered that you and Heidi might have been perfectly suited for one another? I mean, with the kind of luck you've been having with women lately, Heidi could very well have been your last chance at real happiness. Just think, if you'd followed your heart, instead of Max Friedlander's head, you could be the one providing Mim with a grandkid next December, instead of me. Jason To: Jason Trent From: John Trent Subject: Max Friedlander Have I mentioned lately how much I hate you? To: Max Friedlander From: John Trent Subject: SOS Okay, I'll do it. To: John Trent From: Max Friedlander Subject: Operation Paco All right. I'll let the neighbor know to expect you (I mean, me) tonight for the big key exchange. She's got my aunt's spare. It has not apparently occurred to her to wonder why Aunt Helen never gave me a key to her place (that fire in her last apartment was not my fault. There was something wrong with the wiring). Remember, you're supposed to be me, so try to act like you care about the old lady's hemotoma, or whatever it is. And listen, as long as you're being me, could you try to dress with a little...what's the word I'm looking for here? Oh, I know. STYLE. I know for guys like
you who are born into money, the instinct is to downplay the trillions you're worth. And that's cool with me. I mean, I can understand this whole thing you're doing, getting a real job instead of the cushy family one your big brother offered. And I'm totally fine with it. If you want to pretend like you're only making forty five grand a year, that's just great. But while you're being me, could you PLEASE not dress like a grad student? I am begging you: No Grateful Dead T-shirts. And stone-washed jeans? Yeah, those are OUT, John. And those deck shoes you always wear? Would something in a tassel kill you? And for the love of God, invest in a leather jacket. Please. I know it will mean touching some of those precious millions in that trust fund your grandfather left you, but really, something NOT from the Gap would be good. That's all. That's all I ask. Just try to look good when you're imitating me. I have a reputation to uphold, you know. Max PS The neighbor left a number, but I lost it. Her email's melissa.fuller@thenyjournal. To: Max Friedlander From: John Trent Subject: SOS Christ, Friedlander, she works for the NY JOURNAL???? You didn't say that. You didn't say anything about your aunt's neighbor working for the NY Journal. Don't you get it, Max? She might KNOW me. I'm a journalist. So is she. Yeah, we work for rival papers, but for God's sake, the field's pretty small. What if she opens the door and it turns out we've been to the same conferences--or crime scenes? Your cover will be blown. Or do you not care? J PS And how am I supposed to email her? She's going to know I'm not you when she reads my address. To: John Trent From: Max Friedlander Subject: Operation Paco
Page 1 and 2: The Boy Next Door The Boy Next Door
Page 3 and 4: I thought I heard your name, of all
Page 5 and 6: 7:55--Stagger to kitchen. Ingest no
Page 7 and 8: her brain from a giant blood clot t
Page 9 and 10: To: Aaron Spender From: Mel Fuller
Page 11 and 12: the wedding's off. Every girl in my
Page 13 and 14: To: Mel Fuller From: Nadine Wilcoc
Page 15 and 16: Well, enjoy! And you make sure you
Page 17 and 18: To: Mel Fuller From: George Sanche
Page 19 and 20: From: Mel Fuller Subject: I can't
Page 21 and 22: prostituting himself out for photo
Page 23 and 24: To: Tom Barrett From: Max Friedlan
Page 25 and 26: To: Jason Trent From: John Trent
Page 27 and 28: To: Max Friedlander From: John Tre
Page 29: To: Jason Trent From: John Trent
Page 33 and 34: What's more important to him, a bun
Page 35 and 36: Subject: Well???? DON'T TELL NADINE
Page 37 and 38: all. Although I guess it wasn't rea
Page 39 and 40: To: Mel Fuller From: Aaron Spender
Page 41 and 42: From: Jason Trent Subject: How'd I
Page 43 and 44: Your loving sister-in-law, Stacy To
Page 45 and 46: And you do???????????? To: Sergeant
Page 47 and 48: prints, etc. But unless that happen
Page 49 and 50: From: Tony Salerno Subject: Cut it
Page 51 and 52: ad as you say, or are you exaggerat
Page 53 and 54: Sure. The seven o'clock show would
Page 55 and 56: of you at Stella's baby shower. And
Page 57 and 58: To: John Trent From: Jason Trent
Page 59 and 60: same time. This is a marked improve
Page 61 and 62: To: Nadine Wilcock From: Mel Fulle
Page 63 and 64: To: jerrylives@freemail.com From: M
Page 65 and 66: ever coming to visit us again. Are
Page 67 and 68: PS I don't have to tell you how muc
Page 69 and 70: To: jerrylives@freemail.com From: J
Page 71 and 72: To: Mel Fuller From: Tony Salerno
Page 73 and 74: humiliating! Tim Grabowski from Pro
Page 75 and 76: about dogs and chicken bones.... We
Page 77 and 78: was how much I hate the Chronicle,
Page 79 and 80: still have tomorrow's column to do.
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But what I simply cannot forgive yo
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PS You'll never guess what! One of
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Tim To: Tim Grabowski From: Nadine
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Friend Tim: Likewise, I'm sure. Our
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Subject: Miss Fuller Dearest John,
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To: John Trent From: Stacy Trent >
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PS We're out of Cheerios. Can you p
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To: Mel Fuller From: Aaron Spender
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ecipe for crab-stuffed flounder. I
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From: Mel Fuller Subject: My Last
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my sheets, which are sticky now, bu
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as far as I could tell. I mean, the
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From: Mel Fuller Subject: Snickerd
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To: Mel Fuller From: Nadine Wilcoc
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knocked a little while ago, but you
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IS THERE SOMETHING WRONG WITH YOU??
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LOVE, BRITTANY AND ASHLEY To: John
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To: David J. Belew From: John Tren
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Okay, I know it's been a long time
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hours. She never goes twenty-four h
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Tim To: Nadine Wilcock From: Georg
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To:Nadine Wilcock From: Mel Fuller
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I just don't understand what a guy
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To: Mel Fuller From: George Sanche
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Now, we can't really tell if any of
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Anyway, she's wracked all my credit
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was just lovely, and Donny looked s
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ight? Did you tell her it was too l
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To: Dolly Vargas From: Mel Fuller
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To: Nadine Wilcock From: Mel Fulle
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To: Sebastian Leandro From: Max Fr
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To: Mel Fuller From: jerrylives@fr
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Subject: Well, this is it We're lea
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that means it’s time for WORKING?
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To: Mel Fuller From: jerrylives@fr
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To: John Trent From: Stacy Trent
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To: jerrylives@freemail.com From:Me
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stalls.... Go in there and tell her
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security desk, trying to get signed
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To: Mel Fuller From: Dolly Vargas
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pursue a restraining order against
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Something has got to be done about
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could do for all the advice she's g
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think we should just print a big bl
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To: John Trent From: Michael Evere
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If Trent doesn't sue the pants off
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From: Sergeant Paul Reese Subject:
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To: John Trent From: Mel Fuller S
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To: Nadine Wilcock From: Mel Fulle
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To: Mel Fuller From: Max Friedland
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To: John Trent From: Mel Fuller S
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To: Max Friedlander From: Sebastia
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anyway. And what do you think happe
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I would be honored to go to lunch w
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I just spoke with John. He is so do
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whole thing with John has sent you
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Geez, calm down, will you? Max isn'
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To: Tony Salerno From: Nadine Wilc
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Tim Grabowski ; George Sanchez Fro
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From: Mel Fuller Subject: Lunch Oh
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To: George Sanchez From: Mel Fulle
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From: Genevieve Randolph Trent Sub
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But Nadine, I do now, I really beli
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To: Mel Fuller From: Max Friedland
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Don't try to tell me she won't, eit
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Um, I think she had to do some rese
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Max: Don't you know it. Then she ha
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"The perpetrator wished to throw in
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To: Mel Fuller From: Vivica@sophis
Page 228:
To: Mel Fuller From: John Trent S
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