The Boy Next Door - Weebly

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To: Nadine Wilcock From: Mel Fuller Subject: My humming How about this? I feel better AND I'm happy. I know. It seems hard to believe. But it's true. Want to know why I'm happy? Because I'm going out tonight. On a date. An actual date. With a man. What man, you ask? Why, Max Friedlander, if you must know. Where are we going? It's a surprise. But guess what? He's paying. And even though it's to say thank you for saving his aunt's life--though I must say I'm not sure she'd really appreciate my efforts, considering what her quality of life is at the moment--it's still a date. And Mrs. Friedlander might get better. So yes, I guess you could say that overall, I'm very happy. But if my humming bothers you, I'll stop, by all means. Mel To: Mel Fuller From: Dolly Vargas Subject: Did someone say date? Darling, is it true? You and Max, I mean? You're so calm about it, sweetie, that's why I ask. I mean, considering it's the first time a man has asked you out since...well, you know. Why, speak of the devil...there he is, sulking over by the copier as we speak. Poor, poor Aaron. I would think you'd at least head over to Bumble and Bumble for a blow out and a manicure. Pedicure, too, if you're planning on going open-toe. And you know, I know the best little place for bikini waxing that is, if you think tonight is THE night. We always want to look our best in our Christian Diors, now, don't we? You know, I hear the Sphinx is becoming quite popular. Since I know you don't know what that is, I'll explain. It's when they wax not just your bikini line, but the whole Oh, pooh. Peter's on the phone. More later, I promise. XXXOOO Dolly To: Mel Fuller From: Nadine Wilcock Subject: Your date
Okay, I know it's been a long time (that little movie-and-a-slice thing you guys did doesn't count nor that night at Fresche when we all inspected him, or that other night you ended up spending at the animal hospital) so I'm going to make sure you haven't forgotten anything in your date survival kit. Now, check each off these items before you leave the apartment so you'll be sure not to forget them: 1.Lips tick 2.Compact 3.Metrocard (in case you need to make a quick getaway) 4.Money for cab fare (in case you need to make a quick getaway and there are no subway stops nearby) 5.Coverup in case he dumps you and you start crying and your mascara runs 6.Passport (in case he chloroforms you, puts you on a plane to Dubai, and sells you into white slavery, and you need to prove to the authorities after you escape that you are an American citizen) 7.Altoids 8.Hairbrush 9.Clean undies (just in case you end up spending the night) 10.Condoms (ditto) Hope this helps. Nad To: Nadine Wilcock From: Mel Fuller < melissa.fuller@thenyjournal> Subject: <strong>The</strong> List Thanks for that list of things I will supposedly need on my date, but you are forgetting one thing: WE LIVE NEXT DOOR TO EACH OTHER. So if I need clean underwear, I'll just have to go across the hall. Now stop talking about it. Between you and Dolly, I don’t know who's making me more nervous. It's just dinner, for God's sake. Oh, God, I have to go, or I'm going to be late. Mel To: Mel Fuller From: Dolly Vargas Subject: Just one more thing-- Do be sure you use a condom, darling, because Maxie has been around, if you know what I mean. Well, think about it. All those models. <strong>The</strong>re's no telling where they've been, bony little delights that they are. Ta for now.
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The Boy Next Door The Boy Next Door
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I thought I heard your name, of all
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7:55--Stagger to kitchen. Ingest no
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her brain from a giant blood clot t
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To: Aaron Spender From: Mel Fuller
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the wedding's off. Every girl in my
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To: Mel Fuller From: Nadine Wilcoc
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Well, enjoy! And you make sure you
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To: Mel Fuller From: George Sanche
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From: Mel Fuller Subject: I can't
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prostituting himself out for photo
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To: Tom Barrett From: Max Friedlan
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To: Jason Trent From: John Trent
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To: Max Friedlander From: John Tre
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To: Jason Trent From: John Trent
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you who are born into money, the in
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What's more important to him, a bun
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Subject: Well???? DON'T TELL NADINE
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all. Although I guess it wasn't rea
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To: Mel Fuller From: Aaron Spender
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From: Jason Trent Subject: How'd I
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Your loving sister-in-law, Stacy To
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And you do???????????? To: Sergeant
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prints, etc. But unless that happen
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From: Tony Salerno Subject: Cut it
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ad as you say, or are you exaggerat
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Sure. The seven o'clock show would
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of you at Stella's baby shower. And
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To: John Trent From: Jason Trent
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same time. This is a marked improve
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To: Nadine Wilcock From: Mel Fulle
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To: jerrylives@freemail.com From: M
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ever coming to visit us again. Are
Page 67 and 68: PS I don't have to tell you how muc
Page 69 and 70: To: jerrylives@freemail.com From: J
Page 71 and 72: To: Mel Fuller From: Tony Salerno
Page 73 and 74: humiliating! Tim Grabowski from Pro
Page 75 and 76: about dogs and chicken bones.... We
Page 77 and 78: was how much I hate the Chronicle,
Page 79 and 80: still have tomorrow's column to do.
Page 81 and 82: But what I simply cannot forgive yo
Page 83 and 84: PS You'll never guess what! One of
Page 85 and 86: Tim To: Tim Grabowski From: Nadine
Page 87 and 88: Friend Tim: Likewise, I'm sure. Our
Page 89 and 90: Subject: Miss Fuller Dearest John,
Page 91 and 92: To: John Trent From: Stacy Trent >
Page 93 and 94: PS We're out of Cheerios. Can you p
Page 95 and 96: To: Mel Fuller From: Aaron Spender
Page 97 and 98: ecipe for crab-stuffed flounder. I
Page 99 and 100: From: Mel Fuller Subject: My Last
Page 101 and 102: my sheets, which are sticky now, bu
Page 103 and 104: as far as I could tell. I mean, the
Page 105 and 106: From: Mel Fuller Subject: Snickerd
Page 107 and 108: To: Mel Fuller From: Nadine Wilcoc
Page 111 and 112: knocked a little while ago, but you
Page 113 and 114: IS THERE SOMETHING WRONG WITH YOU??
Page 115 and 116: LOVE, BRITTANY AND ASHLEY To: John
Page 117: To: David J. Belew From: John Tren
Page 121 and 122: hours. She never goes twenty-four h
Page 123 and 124: Tim To: Nadine Wilcock From: Georg
Page 125 and 126: To:Nadine Wilcock From: Mel Fuller
Page 127 and 128: I just don't understand what a guy
Page 129 and 130: To: Mel Fuller From: George Sanche
Page 131 and 132: Now, we can't really tell if any of
Page 133 and 134: Anyway, she's wracked all my credit
Page 135 and 136: was just lovely, and Donny looked s
Page 137 and 138: ight? Did you tell her it was too l
Page 139 and 140: To: Dolly Vargas From: Mel Fuller
Page 141 and 142: To: Nadine Wilcock From: Mel Fulle
Page 143 and 144: To: Sebastian Leandro From: Max Fr
Page 147 and 148: To: Mel Fuller From: jerrylives@fr
Page 149 and 150: Subject: Well, this is it We're lea
Page 151: that means it’s time for WORKING?
Page 154 and 155: To: Mel Fuller From: jerrylives@fr
Page 156 and 157: To: John Trent From: Stacy Trent
Page 158 and 159: To: jerrylives@freemail.com From:Me
Page 160 and 161: stalls.... Go in there and tell her
Page 162 and 163: security desk, trying to get signed
Page 164 and 165: To: Mel Fuller From: Dolly Vargas
Page 166 and 167: pursue a restraining order against
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Something has got to be done about
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could do for all the advice she's g
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think we should just print a big bl
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To: John Trent From: Michael Evere
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If Trent doesn't sue the pants off
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From: Sergeant Paul Reese Subject:
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To: John Trent From: Mel Fuller S
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To: Nadine Wilcock From: Mel Fulle
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To: Mel Fuller From: Max Friedland
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To: John Trent From: Mel Fuller S
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To: Max Friedlander From: Sebastia
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anyway. And what do you think happe
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I would be honored to go to lunch w
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I just spoke with John. He is so do
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whole thing with John has sent you
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Geez, calm down, will you? Max isn'
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To: Tony Salerno From: Nadine Wilc
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Tim Grabowski ; George Sanchez Fro
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From: Mel Fuller Subject: Lunch Oh
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To: George Sanchez From: Mel Fulle
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From: Genevieve Randolph Trent Sub
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But Nadine, I do now, I really beli
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To: Mel Fuller From: Max Friedland
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Don't try to tell me she won't, eit
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Um, I think she had to do some rese
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Max: Don't you know it. Then she ha
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"The perpetrator wished to throw in
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To: Mel Fuller From: Vivica@sophis
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To: Mel Fuller From: John Trent S
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