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Download - TRAMP - Arbeit und Leben DGB/VHS

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Working with Older Volunteers in Manual Intergenerational Projects<br />

Example 3: Gifts - resolution<br />

• While gifts in Germany are usually only made on special occasions, social relationships<br />

without a constant exchange of gifts are unthinkable in other countries. Gifts,<br />

whether suitable or not, symbolise the quality of relationships. It is less important as<br />

to what is given as a gift and whether it seems useful to the recipient than the value<br />

of the gift and its implied intention.<br />

• It might also be the case that the African relatives don’t want to embarrass the wealthy<br />

Germans with lesser gifts, but rather want to achieve an equal exchange and therefore<br />

an equal relationship.<br />

• To a lesser extent gifts also have a different significance in European countries, depending<br />

on the region.<br />

Opposing principles<br />

• orchestration ↔ authenticity<br />

Recommended course of action<br />

• The denial of gifts is usually considered an offence; this also applies to not bringing a<br />

gift when being invited.<br />

• The “economical” party should adapt to the situation and consider the symbolic character.<br />

In closer relationships an open discussion may also be advisable. Those who<br />

donate ab<strong>und</strong>antly should know that this is not a common practice everywhere and<br />

that they could actually embarrass others, if they feel that they haven’t got an (appropriate)<br />

gift in return.<br />

Example 4: Missed meetings - resolution<br />

• Depending on the culture, the family is more or less important. In some regions the<br />

intensive contacts are limited to the core family, while in other countries even very<br />

distant relatives are considered important members of the family. The cohesion is very<br />

important, particularly in places, where there’s no state insurance system.<br />

• This particularly applies to celebrations in connection with death and mourning. It<br />

is essential that all relatives are present, and in many cases the deceased have to be<br />

buried on own gro<strong>und</strong>s.<br />

• Depending on the culture, the social factor, thus the family or the job, is valued more<br />

highly.<br />

• While Germans might be considered “unsocial” due to their fewer family ties and the<br />

high priority given to the job, they in turn might assume that the other side is workshy<br />

and unreliable.<br />

Opposing principles<br />

• family ↔ job<br />

Recommended course of action:<br />

• The different priorities should be accepted as far as possible. Members of cultures<br />

with a lesser significance of family should consider the possibility that the other side<br />

is not acting out of unreliability.<br />

• In the abovementioned example the Spaniard might also be <strong>und</strong>er intense pressure<br />

from his family.<br />

• Sometimes the appropriate measure involves a compromise, e.g. searching for alternative<br />

meeting dates.<br />

Set of Methods 161

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