Ritual - St. Michael's Cemetery

Editor’s note: The content in this article has been prepared by The Indian Cremation
Society of Chicagoland (ICSC) to help Hindus to observe some basic rites that have to be
performed for the departed soul. Excerpts of the article are printed here with permission.
For more information visit www.indiancremationnfp.org.
It is estimated that there are about 2,290,000 Indians living in
the USA. Among most, a dignified funeral is an important
part of their lives; the funeral ritual is a key way for ethnic
groups to maintain their cultural identity. With the exception
of death in very early childhood, cremation is for the most part
the only prescribed option for the major religious groups among
Indian-Americans - whether they are they Hindu, Sikh, Jain or
even Buddhist.
At the time of the loss of a dear one, the grieving family and
friends are confronted with many important decisions and
choices about the funeral and cremation arrangements. These
decisions have to be made promptly and correctly all while the
family is still in a time of great emotional stress. And they have to
be made correctly.
The choices to be made are quite a few, and the costs of funerals
vary widely between funeral homes. It is an expensive purchase
for many people; a decision that the grief-stricken family has to
make in a very short period of time Most funeral directors are
professionals, dedicated to help the family achieve their goal of
compassionate and dignified funeral at a reasonable cost.
6 CREMATIONIST – Vol. 47, No. 2, Spring 2011
By the time a family gets to the funeral home or crematorium,
the family has typically gone through several procedures already.
First, there’s an extensive pre-death preparation before the body
is even transported to the deathcare facility. Once the person is
pronounced dead, the following formalities have to be attended
to, and the following items are required for cremation:
• Two mud pots (one big, one small), with covers
• One kilogram (or 2.2 pounds) of rice
• Betel leaf and nut
• Tulsi leaves, flowers, or garland
• A few packets of camphor, agarbathi (udubathi) and an oil
lamp if one is not available at home
• Few pieces of dry wood, charcoal, and a match box
• One sandal wood splinter, if available
• If deceased is a female non-widow: Turmeric, kumkumam
• If deceased is a male: sandalwood paste
• 2.5 meters of white cloth
Death
and
Ritual
A Deep Look
into Understanding
the Hindu
Funeral Ritual

• One packet of milk, if deceased is a child
• $10 worth of coins
• Ganges water
• Small wood splinters for torches (pandham)
• Abishegam materials for bathing (depending on family custom)
• One tin of ghee for torch
• Any other items depending on the advice of the elders in the
family, group, or community. Bear in mind that this is not the
time to argue with anyone about the relevance or irrelevance
of things; proceed calmly and patiently.
All the above items must be brought to the funeral home or
crematorium. All the mourners will wear old clothes that can either
be washed or discarded. White is the color of mourning, not black.
Upon reaching the crematorium:
1. The casket is carried from the vehicle to the platform with
legs pointing South first. It is preferable to keep the casket in
such a way that the leg faces the incineration chamber. In case
it is not in this direction (e.g. facing the gathering), please
ensure that it is carried with the legs first when entering the
incineration chamber.
2. After placing the body on the platform, the person who conducts
rites circumambulates to walk around anti-clockwise three
times, usually starting at the leg point followed by close relatives.
Others would do the same but just one round. A few grains of
rice, or coins or flowers are placed at the mouth by the relatives.
3. Last prayers - this is the time to recite the prayers which can
be mantras, slokas from the Bhagavad Gita, the Upanishads,
Thevaram, etc. The theme is to remind ourselves that the
eternal soul has to commence its journey leaving the mortal
body behind. The soul and body are finally separated, and the
soul peacefully journeys to its destination.
4. After the prayers are recited, the person who performs
the rites will carry a mud pot of water on his left shoulder.
Another person - next of kin, stands behind him with a
sharp iron instrument. Both of them go around the casket
anti-clockwise three times. When the person carrying the
pot reaches the head side, he stops for a second or two,
and the one with the iron instrument hits the pot gently to
make a hole so that water flows out from the hole. The first
hole is made at the bottom of the pot, the second one at the
center above the first hole and the third one at the top, above
the center hole. This water is splashed with the back of the
left hand onto the body by the person who follows. This
procedure is repeated until three holes are made. At the third
round, the pot is dropped behind the person carrying it. He
walks away without turning back or looking at the body. The
water or Ganga is the medium that separates the dead from
the living; in this case, the nearest of the kin.
5. The close relatives and friends may go up to the viewing
window. The others disperse quietly.
6. Whatever things that were brought from the home should be
left behind or discarded, and are not to be taken back home.
Keep the place clean.
Immediately after the funeral all the mourners may bathe before
going home (if possible) and change their clothes or sprinkle
water over themselves and wash their hands before entering
the house, immediately washing or discarding the clothes. The
immediate family is not to go straight home but may proceed to
the banks of a river, or to the sea-shore and after bathing in the
water remain there until sunset, then proceed to the home.
The person who performs the rites and others will go to the
crematorium the next morning to collect the ashes, bringing
several requirements for ash collection: two mud pots, big plastic
bags, one Kg of rice mixed with green gram, two or three banana
leaves (entire), Betel leaf and nut, few bananas, loose flowers,
cooked rice and green gram, few darbha grass, camphor match
box, two or three packets of milk, a small mud oil lamp, wick
and oil, a small towel or piece of cloth white or red and cooked
Sesbania (agathee) leaves.
The procedure is as follows:
1. The Karmi (performer) standing at the head-side will sprinkle
water, followed by milk on the ashes three times.
Rules for Mourning
The “mourners” are considered to be the close family
members on the male side. Women do not observe
mourning rituals for their own parents but for the
parents of their husbands, since through marriage
they change their “gotra.” Parents do not observe for
their children. Siblings can observe the rituals for each
other. The mourners should not eat meat, salt or
drink alcohol, wear perfumes or shave during the 10
days of mourning from the day of death onwards.
• Showering should be done daily with the
minimum amount of luxury.
Continued on page 8
• Cooking should not be done in the house and all
food should be brought from friends’ houses.
• The mourners should sleep on the ground and not
engage in any form of entertainment.
• It is customary not to greet anyone or even to
return a greeting.
• Visitors to the house should not be entertained in
any way.
• These rules should be observed until the 10th day
ceremonies.
• If due to social and professional circumstances
these rules of mourning cannot be observed for
all 10 days they should be observed for at least
3 days.
CREMATIONIST – Vol. 47, No. 2, Spring 2011 7

Did you Know?
A question and answer session with
Pondit Moshan Persaud, a Hindu Pondit
from Brooklyn, NY
Why do Hindus typically choose
cremation?
Hindus typically choose cremation to
release the soul to the five elements of the
world (earth, water, air, heat and space)
as soon as possible. Once the body has
passed away, the process of cremation will
release the soul so that the spirit or soul can
return to the five elements.
A. Pick up the bones from the head, neck, chest region
(vertebrae), the hip and leg and place them in two pots.
The remaining ashes can be lumped together and placed
on a banana leaf. Any excess to be placed in plastic bags.
B. If the ashes are taken to the sea, carry three to four liters
of water with you. Whether at the crematorium or near
the sea, the performer and others who help him will take a
bath and remain in wet clothes while performing the rites.
2. Whether it is done in the crematorium or at the seaside, the
following rites are performed:
A. Spread the banana leaves one over the other with ends visible
(tips facing south). Spread the rice and gram on the leaves
in an oval shape. Arrange the bones on the spread of rice.
Place the bigger bones in the same order it was collected
(from head to toe, with head facing south). Place the other
pot with ashes next to the bones on the banana leaves.
B. Light the lamp and udubathi. Arrange the betel leaf, nut,
and fruits and place them near head side. The towel or the
cloth is to be placed around the heap of bones and the mud
pot with ashes.
C. Take the Ganges water, mix it with tap water and sprinkle
it over the bones followed by milk and water. Make sure
that all the bones are soaked completely. Recite the names
of Shiva, Narayana, Govinda or whatever name you or the
deceased used to recite.
D. Sprinkle the water on the betel leaf, rice, and fruits and
offer it to the departed. Say the appropriate mantras (if
known). Pindas to be placed on darbha.
E. Perform the final aarti, anti-clockwise.
F. The performer should place all the contents in one mud
pot. Then, pour milk and water to the brim so that the
contents are immersed with the liquid.
8 CREMATIONIST – Vol. 47, No. 2, Spring 2011
Why do a large number of people
typically attend Hindu cremation
services?
Hindu’s have large families and also
believe that all neighbors are part of
that family and out of respect to the
deceased they attend the service.
Why do you start the fire?
For closure, the custom comes from
starting the pyre on the beach and
witnessing the entire process.
Who is responsible to start the fire?
The son or brother of the deceased, or
the person in charge of the last rites.
What do you do with the remains?
Within the first 10 days of the cremation
the remains should be released in the
sea or water so that there is no body
remaining on earth and the soul can be
released to the elements.
Why the five-step process with the
casket?
It represents the five elements of the
world and the same with circling the
casket five times.
Does the cremation have to be
carried out by flame or could you
use alternative forms of cremation
such as resomation?
Must be flame.
We have witnessed different customs
such as cutting of hair, breaking of clay
pots. Where do these customs come?
Just like in Christian religion, we have
different forms of Hinduism that have
their own traditions and customs.
G. If it is done near the seaside, immerse the ashes in the sea
by walking into the sea up to the chest with a supporter.
When doing this, one is to look at the sun or turn east
and offer a silent prayer to God requesting that peace be
granted to the departed soul. The performer and others
will take a bath in the sea, recite the names of God or offer
a prayer before returning home.
H. Clean the premises before you leave. Except for the
utensils, pack up all the perishables and place them in the
garbage bins. Nothing is to be taken back home.
I. While doing the above in the crematorium, the attendants
will assist in washing out the ashes and bones. Before
returning home from the crematorium, take a bath.
3. On the 10th, 12th, 16th, 31st day, or any other day depending
on family tradition, mourners will visit the Shiva or Vishnu
temple to pray for a peaceful journey for the departed soul.
Post Cremation Rites
After leaving the crematorium the Karta offers three libations
of water with sesame seeds. The Karta should abstain from
shedding tears while giving the post cremation libations, because
it is believed that the deceased has to consume all the tears.
Whatever things that were brought from the home should be
left behind or discarded and are not to be taken back home. The
place should be kept clean.
The mourners may then all go for bath in a river or sea chanting
some bhajans or kirtans, with the youth walking ahead. The chief
mourner may shave his head.
If the sea bath is not possible then all the mourners should at
least visit the beach, spend some time there and then return
home. At the door of their houses they should chew neem leaves,

inse their mouths with water, and touch black sesame seeds,
lawn grass, or any other auspicious thing. Touching their feet
lightly on a stone, they should enter the house and take a shower
immediately with their clothes on.
In the Evening of the Day of Cremation
When the sun is setting the chief mourner should light a lamp
of sesame oil and place it under a tree out of the draft. [If this is
not possible then the lamp should be lit in a corner of the house
and kept burning for ten days or until the completion of the
mourning rituals].
At the time of lighting the lamp the following prayer should be
recited and then water poured around the lamp.
om andhakaara mahaa ghore mahattaa tamas-aavrute;
tamo nivaaran arthaaya imam deepam dadaamyaham
“ O deceased one, surrounded by a terrible darkness,
encompassed by the mode of nescience, for the
removal of that darkness, I offer this lamp to you”
If possible a learned person should be invited in the evening to give
a discourse on the ephemeral nature of time and the unsubstantial
nature of the universe. The person should discuss the emptiness
of life and the futility of searching for substantiality in the human
body which resembles the trunk of a banana tree. The body
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is constituted of five elements and if it returns to the elements
through natural causes; there is nothing to grieve over. The earth,
ocean, and even deities are bound to be destroyed. The same fate
awaits the entire universe which has arisen like a bubble. How can
it escape destruction? Thus, one should speak to mourners about
the transient nature of life and importance of good karma.
Post Mourning Rituals
On the 10th, 11th, 12th, and 13th day after the death, rituals
are performed in order to mark the termination of the social
isolation of mourning and the returning to normal life. These
rituals consist of a purification ceremony; a fire-ritual for peace
of mind for the family and for the departed one; inviting a return
to joyous living and severance with death and mourning; a rite
to mark the transition of the deceased and a merging with the
ancestors; offerings are made to the nine planets and all the
mourners bathe and wear new clothes. In the evening all the
relatives and friends are invited for a feast; and giving gifts in
charity. These are a minimum of five sesame seeds, clothing,
gold, a water vessel, and a coconut representing a cow and the
price thereof. According to the wishes of the family a further 10
items may be given or even 16.
For more information or to get the Indian Cremation NFP
Resource book, please visit www.indiancremationnfp.org. C
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CREMATIONIST – Vol. 47, No. 2, Spring 2011 9

The raising and lowering of the casket five times, above.
10 CREMATIONIST – Vol. 47, No. 2, Spring 2011
The Hindu Cremation at
St. Michael’s Cemetery
By Dennis Werner
W
hile planning to build a crematory and chapel, we
were researching the best ways to serve the local
NYC metropolitan area. Through our research, we
came to find out that the Hindu community not only prefers
cremation, but they also have ceremonial rituals that require a
chapel substantial enough to hold large amounts of people. While
visiting the local Hindu Temples in Queens, we found that the
majority of Hindu cremations have at least 100 people from the
community come to the crematory to witness final prayers and
the beginning of the cremation process. With this information,
we increased the size of our chapel and built a brick wall around
the retorts so that the people viewing would only be exposed to
the front of the cremation unit and the control panel. We also
use this room to proudly display our CANA and New York State
Certifications. Each of our six crematory operators and all office
management and administration is CANA and New York State
Certified to operate a crematory.
We also learned the importance of the Hindu symbol Om (see
above). By learning more about the Hindu symbols and customs,
we gained mutual respect and agreed to work together to allow
the Hindu families to carry out their beliefs, customs and rituals.
Our two main crematory operators, Lenny and Gene, have
been become well respected within the local Hindu community,
because of their willingness to work with them and allow them
White is the color of mourning in Indian culture.
to carry out their customs. We now know that a Hindu service
usually takes from 30-45 minutes so we allow for time in between
services. We sometimes get backed up, but we still believe that
the service cannot be rushed in order for the families to have
proper closure.
Not all Hindu cremation ceremonies are the same. We have
witnessed several different ceremonial customs such as the five
step process (see Q&A sidebar), breaking of clay pots and hitting a
large clay pot filled with water with a stick. We have also witnessed
hair cutting, chanting while circling the casket several times.
Like most religions, different groups have different customs.
By working with the Hindu community and learning about their
customs and beliefs we are better able to serve their community
and provide a dignified service during their time of need. C
Dennis Werner is currently the General Manager of
St. Michael’s Cemetery and Crematory in Queens,
NY and he also serves on the Boards of CANA and
the Metropolitan Cemetery Association. St. Michael’s
Cemetery is a religious cemetery open to all faiths
since 1852. St. Michael’s opened All Souls Crematory
and Chapel in 2005 to help better serve the diverse community of
Queens, NY.